How to Procrastinate: Studies in @coldhands-and-clockwork - Tumblr Blog

I normally dont care about political intrigue/plots in fiction. HOWEVER Id LOVE to see Temeraires first parliament session (and in general Perscitia and Temeraire steamrolling idiots who still consider them talking animals)

the-griffons-saddlebag

💎 𝗡𝗲𝘄 𝗶𝘁𝗲𝗺! Conch of Water Communion Wondrous item, rare ___ Although all conch shells can sound like the ocean, this one lets you actually hear what it’s saying. While touching a body of water of at least 250 gallons, you can use an action to hold the shell to your ear and ask the water a question that can be answered with either “yes” or “no”. The water will answer the question to the best of its understanding, such as “has another creature stopped to drink from you today?” or “is there something buried in the sand beneath you?” The response may sound different based on what’s in the water—for instance, a blessed well of water may sound priestly, and a poisoned one may sound sick. Once used, this property of the shell shouldn’t be used again until the next dawn. Each time it’s used again before then, the shell has a 20% chance of cracking in half and becoming nonmagical. ___ ✨ Patrons get huge perks! Access this and hundreds of other item cards, art files, and compendium entries when you support The Griffon’s Saddlebag on Patreon for as little as $3 a month!

#loot

victusinveritas

itsjunetime

clowngirl getting an orchiectomy and the surgeon just keeps removing ball after ball after ball after ball after

estrogenesis-vaporeongelion

clown nurse standing by solemnly adding each successive ball to the ones she's already juggling

teaboot

As the resident clothing person in my family of Freaks (affectionate) with five hundred sensory sensitivities and no interest in Dressing Themselves Like The Adults They Are (this is fine and something we joke about) I am having Incredible And Genuine Amounts Of Fun scientifically quizzing and studying each of them individually like a bug in order to hunt down new stuff that 1. They will WEAR, and 2. They will Not Look Like A Trash Bag On The Freeway while wearing.

One of them has been receiving free company tee-shirts from his boss, who we believe suspects him to be homeless

dragoncarrion

Anytime i see a bunch of pride flags i have to restrain myself from saying "where mexico" bc i doubt anyone will know I'm referencing this

clowniconography

omg sooo true bestie! *camera pans over to reveal im talking to the silent, whithered corpse of god*

clowniconography

lets drink to that! *ive contorted the skeletal hand of the corpse to hold a mimosa glass*

clowniconography

shut up about zelda, shut up about locked tomb, shut up about spn. this is the only character tagged in this post that i approve of

pmamtraveller

The Wait by Darian Mederos

the-big-mood

I respect silent marketing.

kaijuno

tsunderebird

wizard-of-interesting-failure

WIZARD PSA: True names have power. Chosen names have more.

probuccalfat1

guy whose last post is "wood nymph pussy hits different" and is never heard from or seen again

wizard-of-interesting-failure

Scenarios:

Devoured, posted mid-coitus

Devoured, posted by nymph afterward

Devoured, but after a sufficient delay to make the post

Lying by implication, subsequently set upon by local nymph population

Now lives happily in an environment with no internet access, in no small part because it has no internet access

Made a new account post-transition

ieafy

I can’t stop drawing mantises I fear

tagfer

cell phone doesn't like water because it is a combination of the other three elements. it is a rock (earth) that we fill with lightning (fire) that can control radio waves (air). if it contained water too, it would be too perfect; it would be like a god. to prevent this, the universe kills the would be uniter-of-the-elements. it's basic science.