UhnNHHHHhHNNNn

Call me Ebb _-_-_ she/her

[fullofwhitehotrage-deactivated2]

[lullabyhulk]

It’s time.

[irlstuff]

IT’S TIME

[hotcommunist-deactivated2019032]

at the therapist

me: this week has been so quiet and mysterious….I’ve been an 8 on the hozier scale of brooding and I’ve made love to the banshee

my therapist: for the last time “mysterious” is not a quantifiable mood and I don’t know what the fuck the hozier scale is

[hotcommunist-deactivated2019032]

2 weeks later

my therapist, finally worn down by my nonsense: okay, you know what, tell me the scale

me, unrolling an ancient scroll i’ve been keeping in my rucksack for just this occasion:

1. awake at dawn communing with the owls

2. holding a wake for a fox i found in a forest that had hyacinths growing from its chest

3. titties

4. finding the baba yaga

5. covering myself from head to toe in peony petals and walking into the sea

6. swimming in a peat bog and discovering the toads are all lesbians

7. assembling ikea furniture for my wife

8. titties again, but avant garde 

9. inviting the banshee in for tea

10. crawling into the moss within an old hollow log deep in the forest and eating out persephone 

[youhaveaguineapigwhere]

I have no idea what any of this fucking means but I love it

[evil-haiku-robot]

I̪̲͌̕͝ ̷̿͞H̵͎Ȧ̩ͭͮ͛V̞̜̼̦͞Eͪ̊ ̸ͭ͜͏N̯͙͐͟O͏͎ͫ̓ ̱I̠ͧͦ́͗D̛ͦ͑̒͘E̘̩͐A̰̣ ̠̓͟͞ W҉̨̩ͣH̛̛̪̺̕Ḁ̢̇̆T͚ͫ ͂AͬN̾҉̴̭̎Y͕̓ͩ͘ ̡O̡̥ͯF̛ͬ̑ ̩̯͚͂́T̼̩͢Ḩ̳̰̽I̡̞̱ͪ͘S̓҉̯͎̔ ̒͞F͕U̘̤C̙K̢͕̙̩ͣI̻͞Ṅ̓G͔ͪ͜͠ ̟͛ M̵̝̽É̆A͠Ņ̺̈́͋ͩS̷̲ ͋ͮ͜B͓̀̒̾̂Uͪ͝T̽͏͏ ̶ͧ͟İ̢́̊ ̞͞L̤ͨͧ͞O̶͓V̸͐E̸ ̴͓͇̝͟I̼̟T̖̑ ̣̊

^EVILHAIKU^bot^2. Accepting that you all are animals is the first step | PayPal | Patreon

[collectionred]

i get preemptively stressed like. a placeholder stress for the stress to come. sure am stressed. not quite sure about what yet but oh boy just you wait

[nisamohi-deactivated20180925]

tying a knot in a string with dirt in your mouth

[collectionred]

hey op can i ask a question

[nisamohi-deactivated20180925]

sure

[collectionred]

you doing okay?

[collectionred]

Sloane: See, what if we just tried being cooperative to earn Rowan’s trust and learn his plan?

MC: Eye eye, captain.

Sloan: You... you said, “aye aye,” right?

MC:

[nisamohi-deactivated20180925]

tying a knot in a string with dirt in your mouth

[collectionred]

hey op can i ask a question

[collectionred]

[collectionred]

MC:

[collectionred]

Things we’ve learned about Vanessa so far:

- whip lesbian

- watches sci-fi

- more like VANessa amiright

- strong sense of duty to her family name

- puts a lot of pressure on herself :(

- in battle, her burning fury towards anything supernatural makes up for the fact that she’s fucking smol

- relies on shitty energy drinks for sustenance

- calls wearing 3 belts “comfortable”

- v prideful but also v noble

- tsundere

(add anything I forgot :) ! )

[wearethewitches]

reblog if ur a cryptid gen z-millennial like me (born between 1994-2003)

[lesbianswift]

FOOD DISCOURSE: reblog with ur opinions on guacamole, olives, mango, hummus, tomatoes, and cannolis

[collectionred]

guacamole is the only thing i worship in this bitch of a life

olives are a GIFT to us all

mango is fine

i’ve never gotten the point of hummus it’s always just disappointing

tomatoes are probably one of the worst things to exist (save for when used in ketchup)

cannolis are beautiful but only if done right otherwise they’re bad they’re just bad

[wlwbat-deactivated20180809]

i regret every decision in my life that led to this moment

[collectionred]

no you dont

[collectionred]

This is literally the equivalent of “Sorry I’m late, I was doing things,” “Hi, I’m Things.”

[collectionred]

say what you want but

Vanessa Helsing is the goth gf we’ve all been looking for tbh

[boarofthenorth100]

Pray For Me

[boarofthenorth100]

Nothings Wrong I Just Want More Power

[vivaciousarcanist]

[paininmyassachusetts]

Would sleeping with a centaur be considered bestiality?

[racistspiderman]

Yes

[paininmyassachusetts]

That raises another question: do centaurs have human or horse genitals? Or both?

[racistspiderman]

Horse.

[volcel-official]

Then the question is, would it be morally acceptable for a centaur to mate with a normal horse

[paininmyassachusetts]

And what would the offspring be like?

[trashcanbees-deactivated2019120]

[kompanie-mutter-deactivated2021]

I hate all of this

[trashcanbees-deactivated2019120]

[slav-orson-krennic-deactivated2]

This is the last thing you see before you die

[jayykesley]

[schrodingers-blursed-kitty]

Ok everyone we found it. The worst post