Call us Multiverse and they and xe pronouns collectively. Not a roleplay blog, as well, this is a side blog!
Plural blog. 20+ body. We're a very large divigenic DID society, so there's a lot of us.
We're fine making friends, but ask that only people 18+ bodily approach us for this. Minors are free to interact with the rest of the blog, though.
No DNI, we just don't interact with who we don't want interacting with us and will block if you break our hidden DNI. So feel free to follow to see what happens!
EXTRA NOTES ABOUT US . . .
About us -
We're neurodivergent and mentally ill, as well as episodically physically disabled.
We're all nonbinary in nature, so even if we use she or he pronouns, they are nonbinary pronouns.
We won't be making a list of alters for this blog. We do tag who is posting. We also tag when alters are mentioned or if a post has their vibes, for fun.
About the society and similar -
We've got a fuckton of members.
We're both god-created and disordered. We have fuckloads of trauma but believe the root of our system is divine in nature. We experience every symptom of DID. We believe some of these gods live within this body and we worship them. We also worship other gods who both have and haven't placed people here.
We don't experience "introjects", as all citizens who appear to be fictional characters are actually a version of that character in the multiverse put into this vessel. Please don't call them introjects, intrpios, or any other term that implies introjection.
We lack an inner world and instead have what we call our "linked world", a world created by one of our gods for us to reside in. This world is *not* open to the public so we don't really experience walk-ins like the typical sense. In that vein, we talk about and worship the Fifty Guardians of this linked world, too.
About our faith -
We practice a very large myriad of faiths and practices. We have some Christian and Wiccan members, so if that bothers you...
About other things -
If you're going to DM out of nowhere, please send more than just a "hey", because so many bots start with a "hey" and nothing else. Introduce yourself or send a meme or something.
We are pro-endogenic but relatively apathetic about syscourse and don't care to get into it. We just believe in trusting that people know themselves best.
Main tags -
#special: whispers of a multiverse - we talk
#special: repeating echoes - reblogs
#special: discussion table - reblogs but with Talking about Things
to be honest any discourse ever in the wider trans community on tumblr makes me wanna go "ok now what about systems. how do systems fit into this wonderful categorization you've got going on. you don't know any systems, you say? think long and hard about why that is. really. sincerely"
#REAL
#also not just trans discourse tbh. any qieer discourse
#queer* #like y'know the mspec lesbian discourse?
#completely fails to take into account plural experiences
OH OKAY IF YOU'RE BRINGING MY TAGS HERE I WILL ELABORATE!!!
i actually made a post alluding to this, but something about the mspec lesbian discourse that always interested me was how often i saw systems being pro mspec lesbian compared to singlets, who were more frequently against them. more specifically — it interested me to see how many systems (ours included) heavily benefited from the label due to the complexities of attraction and gender that comes with being plural, and how many singlets just never considered this to be a possibility.
queer singlets tend to have this mindset that your queerness needs to be "clear cut" in a way that often erases plural experiences from the equation — because plurality, suprise suprise, can cause many complications when it comes to identity. singlets want your identity to be chopped down in a way which is palatable and easy for them to digest — any sort of complexity which would require them to stop and try to understand experiences aside from their own is something they tend to be heavily against.
And those things - plurality and nonhumanity - can overlap in unusual ways.
"Mspec lesbian" is actually a fairly good catch-all for how our system ends up on the scale! But personally, I'm a dragon. I'm aroace and have non-human and non-normative transition goals. I'm also the "core" of the system, or one of them. People don't expect a non-human headmate to be one of the ones born here, or to have such strong feelings about transitioning.
I've changed this body to be more masculinised (top surgery, some T) because that aligns with my nonhuman feelings. But there are also a fair number of humans and humanoids who are also heavy fronters. If I continued to change the body in the few limited ways that I can (I really want blue skin, for example), I'd be making them uncomfortable.
Many of said headmates are also fem-aligned in some way, and have a range of feelings on our top surgery and the inroads we've made into transition. For those of us who have some attachment to girl/womanhood but lean more towards multigender, lesboy, mspec, etc., or for those with less mammalian body plans, it's fine and even welcomed. But for the more human-fem-aligned of us, it creates a strange experience where even though we're afab and can pass as a woman, we still feel dysphoric about the body. We're not laying claim to the transfeminine experience, but there's something there that simply calling us transmasc doesn't cover.
Because of all this, we present as fairly androgynous. We can't have the body reflect all of our genders and identities, or even strongly reflect one of them without causing dysphoria for others, so we settle on something in between that we can dress up as we like. We've noticed a lot of other systems have similar presentations; we've known a handful whose headmates all align strongly enough to one binary gender that they could transition, and a handful who stuck with the body's agab, but the majority of other systems we've met in person have cultivated an ambiguous look for this reason.
Needless to say, this isn't something that goes down very well in the larger trans community, which is still incredibly binarist/exorsexist and demands you have an unchanging, singular relationship with oppression and gender.
I think systems are also really important to note under the category of "detransitioning"!
For a while we were pursuing a more binary-aligned masculine transition path. We stopped doing that when we decided we wanted to try and have a different main fronter.
From the outside, what we did - transitioning up to a certain point, then stopping, seeming unsure, using different feminine names - looks like detransitioning. In actuality, it was just different people taking the collective body and life in different directions.
[image ID: Screenshot of tags reading: yes yes yes # and if you're a nonhuman system people lose their fucking minds # I'm a dog and people are insisting I hold privilege over them in the binary they're forcing me into but # and I can't emphasize this enough I am not a human with a binary gender I am a trans dog with non-normative transition goals #woof woof bark bark baby! if I make you uncomfortable then good! die mad! # I am not binary in any form and neither are the other ppl in this system! that's life! it's complicated! # Stop shoving me into binaries that don't apply to my real lives experiences just so you can have Hot Takes about me! End ID.]
Oh yeah, our existence is a Controversial Topic Of Endless Bad Faith Arguments on here. We're a transfem and two trans men who live together in one body - obviously, our lives are affected by this! We can pretend that it's not and act like we're a singlet with a simple queer identity, but that's not actually true!
Honestly, a lot of the problems with Queer Discourse on this site can be boiled down to 1) refusing to believe other people when they tell you about their lives, and 2) believing that anyone with an identity you don't understand is labeling themselves that way to harm you.
"You say you're transfem, but I think you're a filthy liar who's faking your gender for influence and credibility. I think you're actually a fake transfem who's sneaking into our community and stealing our resources while making a disgusting mockery of our oppression. You have no idea what you're talking about, you can't possibly understand the real transfem experience! You live in a trans man's body, it's impossible for you to be transfem!"
There's a lot that we could say in response to this argument, some outpouring of real life experience and trauma and hardship to prove that it's not a joke being played for laughs, but we don't need to bare our souls to angry strangers on the internet looking for a fight.
My main question is just - what kind of incredible power and benefit do you assume anyone would get by pretending to be transfeminine? Why do you think that someone would go through the trouble of pretending to be transgender to prey upon a community of defenseless women?
(Do you see the parallels to the common transmisogynist argument that transfems cannot be who they say they are, because they're just lying predatory men who are mocking real women's oppression by claiming to be women? Something to think about.)
Wait actually, maybe we’ll add something to this too.
We have never really transitioned in any “significant” way. Medical transition is forbidden where we live and social transitioning is impossible at our current living condition, so we live our life as if we’re a cis woman who wears unisex clothes and binds once in a while. We do know Transgender 101 from the internet but because of this background, we often still feel that we’re not “trans enough” for several reasons. Even our trans members feel this way at times.
Our system has cis people and trans people on both sides of the binary, nonbinary people, you name it. Sometimes our gender identity is inseparable from our alterhumanity, often in weird ways (for example, cistransfem werebeast girls. One in particular relates to a ton of transfem experiences even though her gender has always matched the body). Some other times, we just know, for whatever reason, that we’re cis or trans without taking our body into account. We typically only transition in our headspace if we choose to do so, because even something as simple as purchasing a binder or a packer is difficult to do here.
Our cis guys acknowledge that they face basically the same problems as an average transmasc person, but they themselves don’t transition in headspace so they don’t feel that they’re trans. They’ve always been the same gender, they just ended up in the “wrong” body.
Queerness can be very messy in a system in ways that might not be easily digestible to singlets, and this often makes us afraid to talk about it outside of alterhuman spaces because what if people refuse to understand? What if they choose to hate us because it feels “easier” than trying to understand others?
Adding on that we have seen quite a few plural collectives who take one of the binary discourse positions (usually radfem / tme/tma)
but in nearly if not all cases they either have majority members whom are only masc /or/ fem, or present as one gender externally (ie are gender conforming in dirtspace/'irl'/preferred term).
definition: A place that is comparable to a headspace/innerworld, but instead of being inside someone’s head or psychological in nature, it is spiritual/metaphysical in nature. Usually a pocket dimension/realm or alternate universe.
We've had a lot of realizations about our society in the past few days. About our linked world, about our "introjects" (not introjects), about the Guardian Spirits that we have.
It's a lot. But it also feels... so freeing. That we know ourselves better. That we understand what's going on with us better. It's nice. Even if it's a lot to adjust to, process, and accept.
Like. We vaguely knew and understood the Guardians. We didn't know much about them, or at least compared to Now. We thought they were NPCs, and thought that a few of them weren't also part of our linked world. But that's not true!
The Guardians aren't members who use the body, usually, unless things are really really bad. But they are actual entities who protect us and our world.
I don't know why They let the most of us believe otherwise. But I'm eager to get to know them much better.
Chimera of Ruby Eyes is probably the most protective of the physical body, by proxy of the fact It lives *within* the front building. It's fascinating to have that door properly unlocked and to meet Xhem. To talk to It and get to know another one of the Guardians.
We've had a lot of realizations about our society in the past few days. About our linked world, about our "introjects" (not introjects), about the Guardian Spirits that we have.
It's a lot. But it also feels... so freeing. That we know ourselves better. That we understand what's going on with us better. It's nice. Even if it's a lot to adjust to, process, and accept.
Like. We vaguely knew and understood the Guardians. We didn't know much about them, or at least compared to Now. We thought they were NPCs, and thought that a few of them weren't also part of our linked world. But that's not true!
The Guardians aren't members who use the body, usually, unless things are really really bad. But they are actual entities who protect us and our world.
I don't know why They let the most of us believe otherwise. But I'm eager to get to know them much better.
We've had a lot of realizations about our society in the past few days. About our linked world, about our "introjects" (not introjects), about the Guardian Spirits that we have.
It's a lot. But it also feels... so freeing. That we know ourselves better. That we understand what's going on with us better. It's nice. Even if it's a lot to adjust to, process, and accept.
We're not jobless, but the other manager we were working for fucked us over. For no reason at all. He hired someone for the position we were filling.
We still work at the original store we were at but they don't have enough hours to give us that we don't starve right now. When another employee goes back to school we will, but until then we are capital F Fucked.
when we had a host, our life sucked. she was a tyrant. would not let us front, would censor all our messages, ignored any requests we had, pushed us all the way to the back of her mind. and didn't even focus on herself, she was completely self sabotaging.
but we can't talk about it because our host was very, very well liked by the people around us. even though we're just as significant as she was, because we're "the others", we don't get to have a voice. they miss her. what about the fact that we're fucking free? happier? comfortable?
i personally find that, in many cases, hosts aren't actually there for the benefit of the system, but either A) out of fear of rejection internally and externally or B) looking palatable to the people around them. for us it was both.
on a more general note i find that a lot of people think that having a host is necessary or universally beneficial. a lot of systems, especially polyfragmented systems, might not even have a consistent roster of fronters - maybe people split too often to manage a consistent front, maybe they switch constantly and through a bunch of people, maybe it's just... not how they work. organization as a whole is not possible or wanted for some systems.
it also seems like such a common misconception that alters are contained within a host? which i'm sure is true for many systems, but for many others, a host is someone you live with. not the person you reside within. and i feel like it's forgotten that, just because someone fronts more, they're not more important or deserving of ruling the system with an iron fist.
enormous disclaimer that obviously hosts, be it in the sense of holding the alters, someone who owns the body, keeps people organized, fronts most frequently or literally anything else is completely valid. every system works different, and i respect others thriving in environments that might not work for us
We lack a proper host in personal experience and say we have them in definition only, in that definition of "guy that fronts the most, leads life, and does mostly everything". Even these people reject being the host.
Because we don't function well when it's one guy leading the helm. We have to be constantly switching and working together to get through even just a day. When one person holds the entire fort down, we fail in some way.
This isn't to say that we don't have monopolization of front, but more than this is a conscious thing the rest of us consent to. And same for people leading the body. And it's temporary and the expectation is that if someone else needs to lead, you should release the helm.
But the concept and idea that there's one person who mostly leads life, who mostly does everything, etc that we're so used to being the definition of "host" (and the definition we are using when we say the word) just did not work out for us!
Yes! We used to have people who did that! And they still exist for us, they just know now to accept help and let others do things, to work together. We're best as a full, well oiled clock.
While we don't necessarily feel we had a host for either of the reasons OP said (which is not a dig at her! she did say "most"), it was more in part because we thought... y'know. A DID collective is supposed to have one. We thought that was how we were supposed to function and that that would help us. Turns out, that was wrong! And this push that we should have a host hurt us in the moment.
We have to be constantly switching out to thrive. We need people coming and going from lead constantly, passing the baton around, all that, in order to really get places and thrive.
a hastily made comic because I’ve been Having A Time. mostly for people who already know what systems are/what polyfragmented means (cuz I didn’t explain it) but feel free to show anyone who you think needs it
the lack of discussion about polyfragmented systems, especially very very big polyfragmented systems, is honestly really disappointing. like yeah we made that post about folks with infinite members and such but that is the only time we've seen something like that.
when all you see about your existence is how annoying or difficult or unmanageable it must be, it gets grating. we have NEVER seen a polyfrag post get anywhere close to our amount of members, because apparently anything over 1,500 is completely unmentionable. and even then, polyfragmented medians, spiritual systems, or people who have always been polyfrag are just not talked about.
our most modest estimate is that we have 100,000 members. our more accurate estimate is probably around 500,000. and there is systems who are WAY larger than this, somebody reading this is probably pushing the concept of infinity to a newfound limit!
outside of community spaces, the medical journals about polyfragmentation are so clinical, exclusive, and honestly inaccurate a lot of the time. there's more to multiplicity than just hosts and protectors and persecutors and fully-fledged people who can still somehow be boiled down to a convenient, palatable archetype. (i have thoughts on roles but that will be another post)
so many systems don't or can't have defined or consistent roles, origins, identities, internal communication, switches, structure, innerworlds, amnesia, opinions, etc (or have these things at all!!!) and expecting polyfrag systems to fit into the already narrow and stigmatized definition of what you think a system should be is honestly just plain screwed up.
this is messy and there's a lot more i want to say, but mecfs is kicking my ass, so...
to very large polyfragmented systems: please talk about your experiences. tag rambling highly encouraged!!!
Not a tag ramble but OP is my girlfriend so she'll forgive me because she wuuuuuuuuuuvs me /silly
We call ourselves a society for a reason. We are so much more than just a collective or a system. We are a massive society with entire sections of life. Yeah, we all try to intermingle. But overall, we are unique folks with unique things going on.
We've been huge for a long time, and we're only getting bigger. Of the fronters alone there's about... a thousand? No you don't see them all in one day, but a standard front for us is about 20-30 people At Once! And when we say that shit or people see our fronts, they remark "How do you live like that!" and my colleague there is a Method. And we have perfected that Method. Our brain doesn't even freak it at that point anymore. That's Standard Procedure.
We have so many thoughts on the things polyfragmented collectives are expected to be. That's not really for right here and now though. I'm just personally so tired of the "omg I would kill myself" remarks. Like gee... thanks... I feel great knowing you'd kill yourself in my shoes. Makes me feel wonderful about our situation.
I wanna say, being a massive society and being part of that massive society has made my life so much better. We all have memories of a life before this one, and my memories gave me such a rough one. But here? I'm supported. I can always find someone who helps me with my problem.
And it's not just me. We have an inchling who the more engineering sort and the tech savvy members made her a little car with a very neon and light-reflective flag on it so you can't miss her so she can get around the linked world much easier. A member without human hands has a door to her mini-dimension apartment with a floor pedal to open it because she has doesn't have the body parts to work a door handle that other members made for her. Members with prosthetic limbs can always have them tended by someone else and kept in top shape. When we want a new building, we come together and make it so. Members run little "shops" like bakeries. We run the weekly feast and so many people volunteer to cook and then everyone just has fun eating, chatting, and playing games. Or they clean the common areas or garden or whatever. The newspaper runs with new and old information about life. Town hall runs so many events and organizes so much. People run their own little things for the sake of each other. We all support each other and that's some good shit.
Being a massive society is great. I have a plethora of loved ones and people who love me. Sure I don't get along with everybody, but that's not even true in most small collectives.
I want to see more giant collectives talk about what makes their plural life happy, not this "oh that sounds like the worst thing ever" we get from smaller collectives.
🌸 (cherry blossom) - What things were major influences upon your system? (e.g. life events both positive and negative; meaningful media; other identities)
and...
🌹 (rose) - Is plurality, overall, a net positive or a negative for you? (Or neither?) If given the opportunity to become singlet (whether through fusion or everyone getting their own body), would you take it?
~ phage :3
🌸 — Cherry Blossom
So many media have influenced us deeply. But the main thing coming to mind is how our need for a safe space really influenced our home (term we use for our "headspace"). It's truly our safest place and nobody can intrude upon it or hurt us there.
🌹 — Rose
It's a net positive, with some caveats, I think. The disordered aspects suck butt, but overall it's good.
I do know for certain the second part is a really hard thing to answer. What would be most ideal, in a weird way, is for us to be single forms attached to a greater spiritual whole. Like... if we lived out in the multiverse, we'd want our own forms, but we'd not want to lose each other. We'd still want to be connected in a similar way to the plurality. Weird answer but that's that!
If I ever meet ZUN I want to thank him for a lot of things, like Dark Road and Rumia, but most importantly? The fact that he decided that in Urban Legend in Limbo, his sad wet danger meow meow Mokou, tragic immortal with mastery over fire, meets miss funny thang Futo, dopamine overdosed immortal with a legitimate clinical case of pyromania, and they each find each other so insanely mind blowingly cool — and from around the same era and from allied households, too! — that they immediately become besties and fight to the ‘death’ (different kinds of immortals) to celebrate before scheduling 60 more play dates.
You know Futo got home that day like “MIKO HOLY FUCK YOU GOTTA MEET MY NEW FRIEND” and Miko’s blood pressure spiked while she gripped the hem of her cape because she knows anyone Futo would be this excited for has to be at least deeply deranged herself, meanwhile, Mokou slammed open Keine’s bedroom door at 3:52 AM, and Keine got startled and began undressing because this was sudden but she was not going say no, but then Mokou goes “Keine, I made a new friend, it is imperative that you meet her, she understands the vicisitudes of immortality, yet she dwells not in it’s apparent stagnancy, she flows freely like a spring sparrow”, so Keine is eager to meet whoever could evoke this vigor from the usually dour Mokou, and then the next day she pinches the bridge of her nose in overwhelming shame as she sees Mokou and Futo throwing molotov cocktails and plates at Eientei with big smiles on their faces. A few feet away is Miko, her face cuped in her hands, stewing in something you could only call parental shame. It was the best day of Mokou and Futo’s life.
