as requested- my zine about fat and plus size body types from instagram!š happy drawing everyone!

blake kathryn
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One Nice Bug Per Day
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Kiana Khansmith
Show & Tell
The Bright Sessions
I'd rather be in outer space šø
Color Me Curious
Not today Justin

bliss lane
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tannertan36
almost home

⣠Chile in a Photography ā£
sheepfilms
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

if i look back, i am lost

Jar Jar Binks Fan Club

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@concerningly-murder-y
as requested- my zine about fat and plus size body types from instagram!š happy drawing everyone!
Everything about this is a masterpiece: the girl that says āwowā and the girl that says āhiā shyly and bill awkwardly lifting his hand to say hi to them Iām cracking THE FUCK UP
The way they all immediately straightened up their postures like the fuckin pope walked in š the sheer power this cool science man has over the american people is palpable
Good morning and tuesday to everyone except the guy who stuck his dick in the public mailbox downtown and pissed all over the mail. If you're him fuck you
This is oddly specific. Is there a story there?
Yeah, some guy stuck his dick in the public mailbox downtown and pissed all over the mail
OP you have to tell us that story, I need context
Well you see, some guy stuck his dick in the public mailbox downtown
What happened next?
You wouldn't believe it but he pissed all over the mail
Op is denying us the fucking golden replies to this tweet omg
When i had breast reduction surgery, i got into the OR and got put on this table that looked like a flat crucifix (arms out so they could get to the girls), and i saidĀ āgod, donāt nail me downā
they put the mask on my face and the nurse saidĀ āno jesus treatment todayā
and the last thing i said to her wasĀ ājesus with some big ass tittiesā and then passed out.Ā
What ifā¦.Victoria was a closeted lesbian and accidentally marries Emilyāwho is bisexualāinstead of it being Victor?
(Pt 1)
ā
In all seriousness though, Iāve always had this idea in my head since I first watched this movie twice in theaters and Iām finally making it come true because dammit I want to; this alternate story wouldāve made my heart soar back when I was in the closet and had an embarrassing crush on Emily
Be careful who you call ugly in middle school
Based off my Camp Counselor Jason!AU
Knock Knock
Whoās there?
Coppa
Coppa who?
COPPPAAA CHISSEEEELLL HEAAADDD
Monster + Bubbline kiss
Happy first birthday Knife-Wielding Tentacle..š
dear god, it lives still
Save the date folks, Knife-Wielding Tentacleās second birthday is November 16th.
HAPPY SECOND BIRTHDAY, KNIFE-WIELDING TENTACLE!
Of course heās a Scorpio
HAPPY BIRTHDAY
knife-wielding tentacle is 5 years old todayā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦
They grow up so fast. :ā)
a playlist for when youāre a crewmate in among us <3
i love student housing. iām in the common room waiting for a friend and thereās some dude crying on the couch w a bunch of his friends around him and i can only hear bits and pieces but someone asked himĀ āwho gets the minecraft server if you guys break up?ā and he started crying harder and a 3rd person reached over to smack the guy who asked it on the back of the head
(source)
Whoa, I didnāt realize that it was so deliberate, I honestly thought it was unconscious
Scary, scary.
Gonna add on to this: From the other side of the bar, I see this crap all the time. Seriously. I work at a high-density bar, and let me tell you, I have anywhere from 10-20 guys every night come up and tell me to, āserve her a stronger drink, Iām trying to get lucky tonight, know what I mean?ā usually accompanied with a wink and a gesture at a girl who, in my experience, is going to go from mildly buzzed to definitively hammered if I keep serving her. Now, I like to think Iām a responsible bartender, so I usually tell guys like that to piss off, and, if I can, try to tell the girlās more sober friends that they need to keep an eye on her. But everyone- just so you know, most of the time, when someone you donāt know is buying you a drink, theyāre NOT doing it out of a sense of cordiality, theyāre buying you a drink for the sole purpose of making you let your guard down. So:
Tips for getting drinks-
1. ALWAYS GO TO THE BAR TO GET YOUR OWN DRINK, DO NOT LET STRANGERS CARRY YOUR DRINKS. This is an opportune time for dropping something into your cocktail, and youāre none the wiser.
2.IF YOU ORDER SOMETHING NON-ALCOHOLIC, I promise you, the bartender doesnāt give two shits that youāre not drinking cocktails with your friends, and often, totally understands that you donāt want to let your guard down around strangers. Usually, you can just tell the bartender that youād like something light, and thatās a big clue to us that youāre uncomfortable with whomever youāre standing next to. Again, we see this all the time.
3. If youāre in a position to where you feel uncomfortable not ordering alcohol:
Hereās a list of light liquors, and mixers that wonāt get you drunk, and will still look like an actual cocktail:
X-rated + sprite = easy to drink, sweet, and 12% alcoholic content. Not strong at all, usually runs $6-$8, depending on your state.
Amaretto + sour= sweet, not strong, 26%.
Peach Schnapps+ ginger ale= tastes like mellow butterscotch, 24%.
Melon liquor (Midori, in most bars) + soda water = not overly sweet, 21%
Coffee liquor (Kahlua) +soda = not super sweet, 20%.
Hope this helps someone out!
Backing this up from years of bar tending.
Adding to this:
When I was a fresh bartender, I had a couple sitting in the corner, already drinking when I started my shift. They seemed like they knew each other really well considering how much they had their hands on one another. But I still came by and asked if they were okay. The man just waved me off while the woman said, āI need some water.ā
The man laughed it off and told me, āShe doesnāt need any water. Sheās fine.ā
She was not fine. Clearly. I decided I was going to cut the two off anyway and bring them some water. As I was filling up the glasses, I heard the woman say, āStop. I said no. I donāt feel good.ā
Her tone and attitude changed instantly. She kept pushing his hand away when he reached for her face, turned her head away when he tried to kiss her. Loudly told him, āStop. Iām done for tonight.ā
So I made sure to refill her water the moment she finished it, and I stayed within earshot of them the whole night. And every time I did, the man got mad at me, told me to leave them alone. Their friends were there, surrounding them and told me that those two always fought when they were drunk and apologized, so I relaxed a little. But the last time I refilled her drink, I heard a loud crash.
She fell out of her stool and hit her head on the floor. And he calmly drank his drink. Their friends didnāt even blink. I jumped over the bar to tend to her and he just said, āDonāt worry, Iāll take her home. She always ends up like this. She drinks too much.ā
But it didnāt sound right.
Then the woman began convulsing.
I yelled for the other bartender to call 911 and when I did, the guy suddenly disappeared. I tried asking thr friends questions about him and they just blew it off as the woman being a black our drunk. And one of them said, āWeāll get her home. Donāt worry.ā
But when thr EMTs showed up with the police, they all disappeared too.
A few days later the woman came with an attorney. She asked me and the other bartender who worked before me some questions. Turns out, she didnāt know any of those people. They werenāt her friends or her boyfriend. They had met that night, when the guy asked her if he could buy her a drink. At the hospital, they found traces of Rohypnol in her system.
The guy had Roofied her. And his friends were in on it.
The security camera footage showed he had put something in her drink when she left for the bathroom before my shift.
So seriously, it happens. You have to be careful with your drinks! Always watch it, donāt let anyone handle it, and take it with you wherever you goāeven the bathroom. Or if youāre a regular at that bar, ask the bartender to put it behind the bar. Weāll do it.
Rb for that last add, donāt ever worry about being polite! Protect urself!
REBLOG AND SPREAD THE WORD!
Never EVER trust men
Take it one further, never, ever, trust strangers. Look, Iāve flown wing man with many a friend, gay, straight, and any other stripe of the rainbow. Iām your drink watcher, Iām the sober driver, Iām getting everyone home. Unless weāve agreed, in advance, that you arenāt coming home with meā¦and even then you get a status check before you split. Iāve seen women play just as dirty as men. Itās great to have drinks bought for you, but you owe them nothing. Remember, you didnāt ask that person to buy you a drink, they just did. If you donāt have a watcher, and the bar canāt cover,Ā either finish the drink before the bathroom, take it in with you, or simply never finish it. You didnāt buy it, you arenāt out anything!Ā
Non-alcoholic drinks that look like booze:
Seltzer water or club soda with a wedge of lime or lemon
Ginger ale or Sprite with a splash of grenadine (aka Shirley Temple)
Spicy V-8 or tomato juice
Coke and grenadine (aka Roy Rogers)
Iced tea and lemonade (aka an Arnold Palmer)
Kombucha
Sparkling cider or grape juice
You can also ask for virgin mojitos, daiquiris, or pretty much any fancy cocktail - bartenders have plenty of simple syrups and juices they can combine for something spectacular without a drop of alcohol.Ā Ā
Reblogging for this last list especially because guys, donāt assume how much alcohol you can handle if you donāt know.Ā
āMeet the Reaperā AKA Top 10 photos taken before disaster
Spoiler alert: Grim did not win the game.
Omg this is so amazing.
Grim had absolutely no idea what he was getting himself into here
I recently saw a meme on Facebook that said something along the lines ofĀ āhow to make a millennial panic: lock them in a room with only a phone book and a rotary phone and write the instructions in cursive!ā It had this smugĀ āaha, gotchaā vibe oozing out of it, and itā¦just sort of made me laugh. Like, really? Really? But it also made me thinkā¦
Beyond the fact that I know how to use both a phone book and a rotary phone and can read cursive (as long as itās not too horrifically messy), I think it was the attitude ofĀ āOh no, weāve got you because you couldnāt possibly figure out how to use something thatās new to youā that really made me snort. But I think thatās the key to this and similar memes that Iāve seen.
They donāt think we could figure out how to use something new to us, because they canāt do it.Ā
Like, if you presented a millennial with a rotary phone or a phone book and they had never, ever used one or seen one used before, I can guarantee pretty much any millennial could figure out how to use it. Because thatās what we do: we adapt. Weāve been through so many variations of technology and seen so many new forms of technology emerge that weāve had to learn to adapt swiftly and fluidly. Itās second nature to us.
Put a boomer in a room with a smartphone, laptop, and tablet however, and wellā¦different story.
Iām not sure if they literally donāt understand that presenting a millennial with something they havenāt encountered before would not be an obstacle and certainly not a panic-inducing one, or if they just say things like that to make themselves feel better that they couldnāt do the equivalent, or if itās a combination of the above.
I just realized that the original meme is also, quite accidentally, basically describing the principle behindā¦.. escape rooms.
You know, the recent popular trend in participatory entertainment in which thousands of millennials literally go out and pay money to voluntarily be locked in a room where they have to solve puzzles under a time pressure, often using antiquated or analog technology, secret codes, and mechanisms they donāt yet understand, all without using their phones/the internet. For fun.
For many of us, thatās not panic-inducing, thatās just our idea of an enjoyable Saturday night out with some friends!
Now Iām just laughing even harder.
I think part of the reason that older generations think millennials and younger canāt learn on the fly is that we all have personal computers and headphones so they have absolutely NO idea what we might be doing. Are we learning complex mathematics? Reading fanfiction? Laughing at cat gifs? Complete mystery to the person who canāt see the screen. They see what they perceive as us doing very little physically and assume our minds are doing the same.
another piece of this is that they have no idea how old millennials are and think they are much younger thanĀ āborn 1981-1996.ā
jenga the movie: best bits