gender’s a performance

and I’ve got a whole sitcom complete with laugh track

[conker-shell]

hallo! it’s conker shell, as seen on some tree 🌰

I’m 23 and I go by any pronouns 👍

my main is @hope-more-like-nope so that’s where the follows/likes/asks come from

have a good day!

[thememedaddy]

[energyprison]

Having a job is an awesome way to stay hydrated because you get so bored you start drinking water just for a little excitement

[conker-shell]

I love having theatre friends because every show we put on feels like we’re just in a different au

[angelicguy]

me and the boys have a couple of chains wrapped around the sword in the stone hooked up to mikes toyota tundra gonna pull that fucker out like a tooth.

[seaweed-station]

Me and the boys misunderstood the arcane nature of the stone and now the Toyota is king of England

[vitabreva]

[mariamlovesyou]

new uterine lining just dropped

[ocqueen]

[kingfucko]

i dont care if monday sucks... tuesday cost me sixty bucks... wednesday thursday give no fucks. it's friday im a duck

[thememedaddy]

[animentality]

[biglawbear]

I'm instituting a new policy of "if I can't easily read your crusty scanned PDF then I'm sending it back to you, telling you to get your shit together and save your .docx as .pdf, and causing snakes to manifest inside your house"

[christaaah]

this but also if you are in accounting and you have an Excel file please do not save it as a PDF or take a screenshot of it and then paste it into another Excel file

[biglawbear]

I take it back whatever you have going on is way worse than what I was dealing with holy shit

[firstbornsons-deactivated202605]

@thesummoningdark hello?????

[thesummoningdark]

yeah no this is a real thing an actual human being said to me

[biglawbear]

Good afternoon to everyone in the notes having a horrible time! Y'all are fighting demons I never knew existed!! I think every person that makes you do stupid time wasting shit like this because they refuse to learn basic computer literacy should be fired!!

[6qubed]

@unpretty complimentary psychic damage

[whisqrs]

why does my boyfriend have to turn everything into a game of saw

[adaine]

the death of dvds is so fucked. what about bonus features

[adaine]

far far away idol would never happen now

[whineosaur]

There is no greater bond on this earth than when you all despise and carry untold righteous anger about one person and then when you’re all together someone is like “so about that dead horse” and everyone starts sounding like Michael Jackson with the way they’re chanting beat it

[archliches]

[puntless]

[lvmimis]

tbh i love hear me outs but i also love the opposite of hear me outs where it’s like nearly everyone thinks they’re fuckable except you

[vintxgemiseries]

count me outs

[tallochar]

Adopting that immediately.

[orbitalyear-deactivated20230513]

oh my god im going fucking crazy *continues to live exactly the same*