༘⋆｡ things overheard at the bar starters.
no, i'm not hitting on you. unless it's working.
you're not doing karaoke again.
why are there fries in your purse?
what's the strongest drink on the menu?
no, i don't remember your name.
if you tell anyone what i'm about to say, i'll key your car.
it's last call. get a drink or go home.
they just tipped with monopoly money.
i'm saving this story for your future wedding toast.
i'm your wingperson tonight, give me the target.
you're not from around here, are you?
i'm your best friend, not your conscience.
say that again and i will make a scene.
you're my bestie now, i don't care that we met 30 seconds ago.
i'd buy you a drink but i'd rather make you breakfast.
i swear i only had two drinks...
this is a judgement free zone.
they said they were working late...
let's play pool. if i win, you owe me a real conversation.
if i tip you $20, will you say i was never here?
that was supposed to impress them...
it's not a fake, it's retro!
don't test me, i'm not drunk enough to forgive you.
can you lie and say i'm not allowed tequila anymore?
if you want a mojito, you can muddle the mint.
i don't think that's your real name.
make me something dangerous and don't ask questions.
you cannot cry on a stranger's shoulder!
can you get me something non-alcoholic? i'm designated driver.
no, i don't want to join the conga line.
if i ask for a double, will you pretend i'm not spiraling?
you always ruin nights like this!
okay but technically, i'm turning [18/21] this year.
i'm not your therapist. that'll be $14.
no, you don't need to text them, that's why i took your phone.
tell him i'm your sister or something.
you ever seen somebody ruin their own life in 5 minutes? watch this.
you can throw up now or in my car.
if i were a drink, i'd be the one you remember tomorrow.
we said no shots, why are there shots?!
promise you won't hate me tomorrow?
let's go somewhere quieter.
we always do this. drink, flirt, run...
i don't want tonight to end.
can we get pizza after this?
do you want to dance? i won't step on your feet.
don't climb on the table!
why are you laughing and texting?!
titsay
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