boundaries, gatekeeping, and the concept of exclusive posts (discussion)
[pt. boundaries, gatekeeping, and the concept of exclusive posts (discussion) /end pt.]
for this post only, and for any inboxes related to this post, radqueers and transid may talk to us about it. theres no point in making a post about radqueers and transids and preventing them from partaking in conversation, or explaining their side.
hi. something thats been sitting simmering on the backburner for a while. mainly forgot about it most days. every now and then we remembered that this is something we'd wanna talk about.
if you knew us in the past, or at least, scrolled back far enough, youd see posts of ours yelling and screaming about how we didnt want transids or radqueers to use them (the terms we made)
well heres the thing; we were very much so a anti-transid and anti-radqueer then, but we were vile. even so much so we look back on ways we used to think and we see downright ableist and exclusionary behavior in some of the way we think.
oh no, this isnt us about to say we're suddenly pro-radqueer or pro-transid. this is just us admitting we were absolutely unjustifiably hateful against them then. we've matured a lot since then. we dont often talk about transid and radqueer topics since they are commonly controversial, and a lot of folk within the mogai community label themselves as either strictly pro or anti radqueer and/or transid.
theres a reason why we say on our pinned post that any previous byi banner before the current one is outdated and shouldnt be referenced. weve adopted a strict "no gatekeeping" mindset with our terms and should only apply a exclusive label cautiously and sparingly.
but also, what we had was not really a "boundary". what we state now is our boundaries, or at least, is meant to be taken as one. and this post states some boundaries or rules when it comes to inboxing us, because this is talking to us directly.
so, this means its unnecessary to try to prevent groups of people we have opposing stances to from using our terms. thats not for us to decide. we provide terms for a larger community, we do not control or police who gets to identify as this or that. and we understand the risk of it.
so we limit our exclusive-labeled terms for terms intended for certain groups of people; take our central asian queer presentation terms for example. they are exclusive to central asian and/or mixed central asian exclusive, because of course, they are only intended for those people. same for our terms relating to cluster b disorders, they are intended for cluster b people, so we make it exclusive to them, simple.
we would gladly appreciate it if transid people who label themselves as transcentralasian to not use those terms, but weve accepted that theyll just do it anyway. thats the thing with so many terms, you can try to tell transid folk of them to not use it, but theyre likely still gonna use it anyway. and it used to bother us so much, but nowadays we care a lot less. we know theyre likely gonna use it. all we can do is just ask kindly that they dont.
and for the love of fuck you anti-transid people better not take what we said and use it as a excuse to be hateful or harass them. people are gonna exist, even ones we particularly dont like, and theyre going to use whatever terms they think apply to them. and believe us, learning to accept thats gonna happen made us a lot more calmer.
but we only make that little side argument in relation to transids alone because its a unique situation.
additionally, we cannot be entirely pro or anti radqueer and transid. we are anti-radqueer leaning. but the concept of what radqueers stand for is hopeful, but fuck, is the community repulsive. and for transids, they are not entirely good or bad. there are some fun transids, i mean hell, even we identify with some transids -yes, absolutely ground breaking news, we identify with a few! dont freak out on us about it, we dont care what you have to say about it-. thats just the truth. how one sees transids is really ambiguous. since educating on ourselves on transids and hearing both sides we'll always be somewhere outside the pro-anti box when it comes to them. we're sort of neutral and/or critical.
aside from terms exclusive to groups of people, theyre not the same thing as boundaries. similar, but not the same. dnis dont work, and we're a mogai blog, so we dont have one. its why we're okay with transids and radqueers generally using our terms. go ahead, we dont care, its not up to us how you identify. and applies to anti endos too; we have made it very known -or, at least i think we did- that we are pro endo or just generally very pro plural. we dont gatekeep.
any one from any side is open to discuss on this post, just dont start bitching at each other or start arguments. if this happens, we will block you from this blog, and at worse, turn off reblogs completly. so be civil.
