ACE

little scrunklie reading fanfiction/19

[murderbot]

making a new post for samah and her baby ammar @ammar-family24 as a compilation of their multiple posts

samah’s original campaign and account are shared by 90-ghost, but it was shut down as her organiser’s bank account was deactivated

proof samah asked me to use my paypal / ko-fi account here

starryeyedgiant is the ko-fi link used to raise funds for ammar's weekly digoxin injection - he needs this on time every week, or he will need a more intensive $3k+ injection in addition to this one to avoid his heart giving out

unfortunately, this is still a temporary measure and we urgently need to evacuate him in order to get him heart surgery in egypt, or he will still die as the injection does damage his heart over time

$0 / $1367

Buy starryeyedgiant a Coffee

Become a supporter of starryeyedgiant today!

acquisitioninitialization is where ammar's food needs go - currently, the doctor has recommended that he start eating solid food rather than just milk, so this is raising money for some fruits and meat for him

$5 / $402

Support Cam

Support Cam

systemprotocol is currently being used to raise funds for buying winter clothes and a blanket for ammar - at time of writing the focus is on buying him one set of winter clothes, as he is outgrowing all the clothes he currently has

$10 / $276

Support CAM.exe

Support CAM.exe

samah's gofundme campaign is focusing on raising the money for purchasing two passports so that she and ammar may leave for egypt. currently passports are $8k in cash per person

this will let her finally get him the heart surgery he desperately needs - as mentioned, the digoxin is only a temporary measure and the longer ammar is on it, the more it will also damage his heart. he can't take the injection for much longer

we really need this money in three months - this means by january.

$8,059 / $34,699

Donate to Help Samah and Ammar Find Safety in Egypt, organized by Macy Boulahcaine

I’m here raising funds for my friend Samah whose son Ammar was born three m… Macy Boulahcaine needs your support for Help Samah and Ammar Fi

adopts for donating

pwyw commissions for donating

the current cash conversion fee is 40%, everything is thus priced accordingly. breakdowns for prices are under the cut

for injection:

the base amount for the injection is $500, the $250 in cash now needs us to have $416.70, and therefore samah requires $666.70 in hand. the paypal fee will require us to have $952.40, and the ko-fi fee will require us to raise $1003 in total

the new transportation cost of $130 becomes $216.70 due to the cash conversion. the paypal fee will need us to have $309.60, and the ko-fi fee will need us to raise $325.90

the fever-reducing medicine is $15, which becomes $25 due to the cash commission. paypal's fee will require $35.71, and the ko-fi fee will need us to have $37.59

this means that in total, we now need to raise $1367

for food: samah has found a deal that will allow her to buy fruits and meat for $200 - and only half of it needs to be paid in cash.

half is $100 -> cash converted 40% = $166.70 $166.70 + $100 = $266.70 in hand 30% paypal fee = $381 needs to be sent for her to receive the correct amount 5% ko-fi fee = $402 needs to be raised total

for clothes / blanket: one set of winter clothes is $110, while the blanket is $235 $110 -> cash converted 40% = $183.30 30% paypal fee = $261.90 to be sent to her 5% ko-fi fee = $276 to be raised total

for gofundme / passport: currently, the rate she needs to pay is $8000 in cash for just the passport for each person - despite the fact that ammar is a baby, this is now the amount she needs to pay. so that is $16,000

the 55% cash conversion rate is slated to become 40% on 8th november, and it is quite likely that we will no longer need to use the paypal which asks for a 30% commission fee to get this money to samah

therefore, for now assuming that only the cash conversion fee needs to be accounted for, this would be $26,670 that we need to raise

@a1m3v @aria-ashryver @awesomepeoplehangingouttogether @batmaneveryway @bigleaf-girl

@blu-berriez @bongjoonheaux @bowsandbands @cemetaryvampire @cerastes

@certified-dentist @chemautopsy @chronicschmonic @communistchameleon @communistkenobi-archive

@conversationswithamillennial @cryptid-catnip @decolonize-the-everything @dirkcapitationn @dixxv

@fatalbloomsinmoon @fototingobug @g3wgaw @gainnecorpse @garfield-baybee

@gasfuzbj @gaza-evacuation-funds @gearbroth @greenpinkstraw @greydrits

@hamsterdads @haootia @ha-youwish @heba-20 @heijegerkannibal

@heritagepostsbot @himbo-noxx @ichor-arrows @ihavenoideashelp @imp-panada

@insufferablepilled

[murderbot]

a very cold winter storm hit samah 2 weeks ago and ammar was completely defenseless for it. it made his condition worse as no one raised the funds for him to buy any clothes.

ammar urgently needs winter clothes for this as well as underwear. samah needs three sets of clothes for him, but i have kept the goal small to let us focus on materially getting at least one set so that ammar will not freeze to death in the tent

the price calculation for the clothes is listed under the cut of the original post but the price for the underwear + cost of travel will be listed under this one - this is on systemprotocol

$377 / $535

unfortunately, the price for the injection at starryeyedgiant has also required another adjustment

due to ammar's weakness from his ongoing medical conditions, the doctor has told samah he needs an immune globulin injection throughout the winter to boost his immune system and protect him from winter illnesses

this injection costs $350 in cash and he will need it every week all winter, which makes the price we have to raise for him astronomically high - more than it's ever been before. he didn't need this last winter because he wasn't so sickly then. please understand that this is the toll not treating his conditions properly has taken

$48 / $2244

samah and i also had a discussion and there is the possibility of being able to get the passports at half the price first, and pay for the rest later.

we aren't sure if this will be a possibility that will work or not, but in anticipation for the possibility i have now changed the gofundme goal to be half the price of 2 passports, as well as the fee for coordinating travel across the border

$8,226 / $24,730

all adjusted calculations are under the cut

for underwear: one pair of underwear is $20, we are buying two for now $40 -> cash conversion fee 40% = $66.67 30% paypal fee = $95.24 to be sent to her 5% ko-fi fee = $100.30 to be raised underwear [$101] + winter clothes [$276] = $377

30% paypal fee = $150 is what she has stated she needs me to send after fees, this is being accepted without cash conversion 5% ko-fi fee = $158

clothes [$377] + transport costs [$158] = $535

for medicine: $350 for immune globulin injection $350 -> cash conversion fee 40% = $583.30 30% paypal fee = $833.30 to be sent to her 5% ko-fi fee = $877.20 to be raised immune globulin injection [$877] + rest of injection costs [$1367] = $2244 total

for passports: currently, the rate she needs to pay is $8000 in cash for just the passport for each person - despite the fact that ammar is a baby, this is now the amount she needs to pay. so that is $16,000

half of that price would just be $8000 again, and the co-ordination fees for travel would only need to be paid for samah. the co-ordination fee is not going to be more than $2000

$8000 + $2000 = $10,000 $10,000 -> cash conversion fee 40% = $16,670

this is going through a bank account with international banking, so there is neither paypal fees nor ko-fi fees. i am unclear if international banking has fees, but for now this means the total amount to raise is $16,670

@yael-things @therearenonutsforsomeendermen @noxumblog @ashkaranast @donationsmatter

@callie-flower @patchoulitoes @stonedustghost @ofishally @stellaristcs

@redmystery314 @asquidnotkid @omorimoroii @tanoroe @slightly-foolish

@sergeantsarga @thebluespacecow @reusablebagofrats @eptck @blackcrystalball

@lampthehealthminister @holyeaglecupcakesposts @teeethbrush @bunnannie @lesbitching

@lonelypotato23 @swaggy-hairy-thang @murenaaaaa @littlegaypancake @zimislockedinthefreezer

@catboywillferal @tspicer23 @cipherinator @missivorystone @4de2ssy0

@alpabett @99orangeblossoms @sematary-drive @knittedquails @masterofthepistachio

@gagreflexoxo @owlchow @specificiumray @valentinemailbox @patzw

@one-cold-witch @d1anna @esoteric-brustle @lpslover6669

[murderbot]

$152 / $2244

unfortunately, $117 of the money we had raised for ammar's injection next week had to be used to buy medicine for him, as he had an adverse side-effect to some vaccines babies at his age range needed to be given

we have 4 more days after this to raise the money for his injection

$6 / $535

we also were able to raise a little bit of money for ammar's winter clothes, and this is greatly appreciated

$8,749 / $24,730

we received no more donations to the gofundme today, but we have received a little bit more otherwise, and this is much appreciated

@russianimperialist @catgirlstalin @komsomolka @catgirlcommissar @cappucino-commie

@transmutationisms @gabajoofs @spaghettioverdose @thottacelli @deadbodyrave

@meshugenist @titiadocigarro @junglejim4322 @homeintoexile @moonlightdance

@maimonidiva @lacommunedeparis @yrn-te-ao @iranianbae @oxidization

@post-brahminism @riotdyke @ouroborosmoons @website-enjoyer @aristotels

@zvaigzdelasas @peng-dehuai @revmir @selamat-linting @ouroborosmoons

@tatarstani @hmltn44 @nyantara @genkishoujo @koucrunchwrap

@marxistlesbianist @phenakistoskope @marxistmegatron @chizhik-pyzhik @innerchildabortionclinic

@timetravellingkitty @whitesalmanrushdie @timetravelstudies @nekomahir @sivavakkiyar

@aristotels @deermouth @jingerpi @zapatism @xinakwans

@marxism-transgenderism @marxism-ex-solium @hurricanewindattack @huzni @marxistmegatron

[murderbot]

$223 / $2251

we were given some more donations, but unfortunately also had to use a little more of the money - the total amount needed was $169.70, as some of the fees weren't accounted for previously

samah has indicated the cash commission fee has increased from 40% to 45% as well, though we also have a new paypal whose fee is only 25% - this makes the money we need total only about $7 more, thank god

i have put the re-calculated amount for this under the cut, and we now have 3 more days left to raise this money

for injection:

the base amount for the injection is $500, the $250 in cash now needs us to have $454.50, and therefore samah requires $704.50 in hand. the paypal fee will require us to have $939.30, and the ko-fi fee will require us to raise $988.70 in total

the new transportation cost of $130 becomes $236.40 due to the cash conversion. the paypal fee will need us to have $315.20, and the ko-fi fee will need us to raise $331.80

the fever-reducing medicine is $15, which becomes $27.27 due to the cash commission. paypal's fee will require $36.36, and the ko-fi fee will need us to have $38.27

this means that in total for this injection, we now need to raise $1358

$350 for immune globulin injection $350 -> cash conversion fee 45% = $636.40 25% paypal fee = $848.50 to be sent to her 5% ko-fi fee = $893.20 to be raised immune globulin injection [$893.20] + rest of injection costs [$1358] = $2251 total

@prisonhannibal @genderdog @geekydragon @comrademango @amvs

@p0pp3t @t-800 @tethys-saturnalia @anghju @sniffingcinnamon

@sunnylittledragon @linkedsoul @jewfrogs @balaclava-trismegistus @avi-wings

@innovatorbunny @truffleskies  @not-a-hawk @indignantdessertbirds @ropes3amthoughts

@slagginbitch @rob-os-17 @oursapphirestars @virovac @misted-buttercup-enjoyer

@shykino @saltycharacters @2bu @strangestcase @darkmatterblade

@turtletoria @pretendingtobeaperson @pikslasrce @omtai @carfuckerlynch

@aristotels @toesuckingoctober  @bearie @lesbiandardevil @hjarta

@doubleca5t @wuntrum @nosferatu-library-for-palestine

[murderbot]

unfortunately, if you have clicked through to our ko-fis, you may have noticed that they no longer display.

i think it is possible someone has reported them - regardless, they are currently unpublished. ko-fi wants us to display evidence of how we are using our earnings, and while we have submitted such things, they say it will take up to 7 business days to get back to us

obviously, ammar cannot wait for that length of time for his injection. therefore, though it isn't ideal, we have found an alternative website that can accept payments to my friend's paypal

starryeyedgiant's profile - Liberapay

Samah and her baby son Ammar are currently living under siege in the Gaza Strip, much like millions of other people. Ammar is extremely ill

$0 / $2251

unfortunately, though this is the best option we have available, it automatically asks for repeat payments. you can just discontinue the donation immediately after the first time, as viewed below, and i hope this will still be a helpful alternative to let us obtain the money.

Can I make a one-time donation? One-time donations aren't properly supported yet, but you can discontinue your donation immediately after initiating the first payment.

if there are other alternative sites to ko-fi you think we can use while we're trying to see if ko-fi will even let us continue, feel free to let us know

$8,790 / $24,730

thank you for the continued donations to the gofundme campaign as well, it's very appreciated!

@rupertholmes @kingofdinosaurs @cainskeeper @romantic-cadaver @classy-thief

@subparcarrion @rainbowofoddcolours @cogdat @reasonablemilk3254 @autisticsquidward

@american-horror32 @cringearcade @manir01 @hibiscuslovecandles @shinjisdone

@thesneklordwithwings @its-just-an-expression @ghostlylicious @horsesharkinahatadventures @lionacuty

@bardthestoner @posherieee @genderandanger @multiifandomer @in-bituin-the-stars

@coffeeisaritual @salty-mush-soup @entryno17 @fraseris @odxball

@alexandersimpleton @sunflower-key @woolysstuff @pookietsunoda @mc-tummy-blur

@king-b0mbastic @pedrasacorn @leonw4nter @donnerpartyofone @aniihera

@winter-spark @typewriter-worries @61137 @crunchyspositivybubble @ashlingmizuoka

@ash-tea @ashlingnarcos

[twistedsweethearts]

People: Mental Health Matters!

Those same people seeing mentally ill people posting online: Reports their account resulting in that person losing their friends and their coping mechanism

People: I’m helping :D

-

Genuinely you’re not helping anyone by reporting accounts who talk about sui and sh. Often this is our only source of escapism. And we’re just venting out our frustrations to people who actually understand us and care.

Just leave us the hell alone, when I lost my first account I was in such utter panic, and I still have moots I’ve yet to find again because of the person who reported my last blog.

You’re just making everything worse.

Just block us and leave us alone.

[sunanthrope]

Does anyone else feel like they spent their whole lives learning about the world as if it were a separate thing they aren't a part of?

Really jarring for me to realize that hey I'm 18. My adult life is JUST beginning. I could have a kid if I wanted to. Or get a job or go to college. I'll grow old. That's so bizarre to me? I always sort of just assumed that the rules of humanity applied to everyone but me. As if I've been researching a video game that i now get to join in on, but... I never really wanted to join in on it? Can I just stay in spectator mode?? Maybe it's a DPDR thing but. What do you mean i now have to apply the life skills i learned? It was fun enough to just learn them.

[hymnhades]

Why does everything always have to be about everyone else. Why do I have to be the considerate one. Why can’t i have one fucking moment where my desires are priority.

[ammonite-collective]

To people who are kind for selfish reasons, I love you.

To people who are kind because it makes you look good, I love you.

To people who are kind because you get supply out of it, I love you.

If every kind thing you do is against your nature and the way you are wired, I love you. I see you. Your effort is noted and I’m proud of you.

[narcissisticpdcultureis]

suspected covert npd culture is externally having an inferiority complex to mask your superiority complex which may or may not be masking another more real inferiority complex

.

[sacredfang]

the npd experience is saying youre always right and are the best as a JOKE and someone combats it and now youre actually upset

[skyrages]

Why is no one talking about how having diagnosed ASPD or psychopathy (also a ‘lack of remorse’ also is a frequent determining factor on parole or sentencing, as if that’s fucking controllable) gets you worse sentencing, like longer prison time or lose parole or even death penalty over life according to some. Literally the most blatant ableism nobody talks about. All considered normal and valid and talked about casually. Occasionally, ive heard of non ableist psychiatrists refuse to diagnose people with aspd when they might get in trouble with the law in future because of a fear theyd get worse sentences or death because of this. Having a disorder about a lack of empathy and impulse control is somehow considered voluntary and making you more “evil” and deserving of suffering. Prison system is shit in general but this is a great example.

[niitroglycerin]

i hate learning new things from the beginning. why am i not immediately good at this ? why should i need to learn? Is this reflective of my overall worth as a person? if i do not pick it up quickly does that make me a useless and worthless idiot? and the answer is Yes

[suchanormalperson]

When you're expressing your NPD thoughts/behaviors to someone, but you're suddenly just hit with the urge to image control.

So you just immediately have to go "but yeah, I know that's irrational, and it's not my real thoughts. I know it's bad. I'm not actually like that, chat. Please believe me and don't think less/worse of me. I'm actually so cool and so self-aware which is Good. It all stays inside my head and I am Not Toxic or A Bad Person. Trust."

Bonus points if you're lying to some extent.

[equalperson]

I find it so ironic how many stereotypes about narcissists aren't just inaccurate, but are actually the complete opposite of how the average narcissist thinks.

"narcissism is excessive self-love" when most narcissists feel shame more easily than non-narcs do.

"narcissists don't work hard" when most narcissists are prone to perfectionism.

"narcissists are abusers who only pretend to be victims" when most narcissists were abused in childhood and are often on the receiving end of abusive relationships in adulthood.

"narcissists don't try to fit in" when most narcissists are constantly watching for signs of respect or criticism, constantly adjusting our behavior so those around us will see us as competent and pleasant.

and then when you describe what narcissism is actually like, they insist that a narcissist would never act like that, that anyone who fits that description must just have post-traumatic stress or one of the "good" PDs (if they believe there are good ones, that is).

[rabbitology]

(Absolutely seething with rage) oh yeah no I’m good don’t worry :).

[narcissisticpdcultureis]

NPD/ASPD culture is literally just this fucking image

.

[faxnmaxxing]

npd is like "i'm the best person ever i'm next to God everyone should worship me" and then someone points out The Mistake so now the only solution is to kill myself

[sodapillz]

“How to break a narcissist”

“How to manipulate a narcissist”

“How to isolate a narcissist”

Hey! That’s an awesome way to exacerbate a pwNPD’s symptoms and make BOTH of your situations even worse <33

[youlookkindadead]

i've seen quite a bit of confusion about this, so let me attempt to clear things up :

empathy is the ability to feel somebody's emotions as though they are affecting you personally. for example, somebody tells you "my dog died last night!" -> you now feel as though you've lost a pet personally -> you feel grief and sadness just like the other person. not everyone has empathy. it's a trait some people develop and others don't. some have high empathy, some have low empathy, some (like me) have none.

sympathy is the ability to understand and care about somebody else's struggles, even if you don't feel them yourself. so, somebody tells you their dog died -> you realize how this affects them emotionally -> you care about this person, and are upset that they are suffering. not everyone has sympathy either! it's a scale, just like empathy.

compassion is doing something to relieve another person's suffering or make them feel better. somebody tells you their dog died -> you don't want them to remain upset -> you come up with ways to help them feel better, like offering comfort and distractions, or other forms of support. compassion is a learned trait, not something you can be born with like empathy or sympathy. anyone can learn to be compassionate, although some may struggle more with it than others; it's a skill, just like anything else.

however, none of these are required to be a good person. that's a choice you make on your own accord. i hope this clears things up!

if you're reading this please boost my mutual aid post if you can to help me not starve

[tennaslovebug]

"narcissists will FEIGN empathy as a MANIPULATION TACTIC..." well what the fuck else am i supposed to do??? let you know that i dont care??? tarnish my good reputation with you for literally nothing??? why would i ever do that💀

-🫀