Lord of the Things @crowkenshield - Tumblr Blog

Man I just make banger hobbit posts this is awesome. I need to post my stupid shitpost drafts more often

Hmm 💭 I like the look of female dwarves with shorter beards compared to their male counterparts, but I don't wanna take the cowards way out , so now I'm wondering if dwarves as a SPECIES have different rules for their developmental hormones 💭💭 maybe female dwarves just naturally struggle growing hair in general? Even on the tops of their heads? Like estrogen and testosterone swapped their hair growth properties... Many thoughts

#apologies for the super gendered language I'm mainly talking from a like. biological standpoint yk.#ooo oo it'd help my tguy Kili headcanon cuz he also kinda has shorter head hair than the others! nodding nodding #// crow yaps #the hobbit #lotr #lord of the rings #tolkein #dwarves #oh and maybe female dwarves with naturally higher testosterone grow longer beards and it's like.. a beauty standard? hmm #deffo a lot to parse over

Thinking about how Thorin gave Bilbo the mithril shirt that no blade can pierce and then he marched right up that mountain and got pierced by a blade so badly he Died. Oooo I just know that keeps Bilbo up at night

#the hobbit #bilbo baggins #thorin oakenshield #bagginshield #lotr #// crow yaps

eddied1ass

rewatching the hobbit and oh my god the gender envy kili gives me is insane. someone pls sedate me RIGHT NOW😭😭😭😭😭 i can't deal with this rn

LIKE HELLO?????? HE'S SO GENDER

#wait. ponytail Kili 👀👀👀👀#truth nuke tho I've been on the trans Kili train for eons #I see a male dwarf with a patchy beard and beautiful eyes and I understand the transgender struggle /hj #kili durin

Bombur has so much screentime despite having 0 actual lines to the point that I low-key started headcanoning him as selectively mute without realizing it... When he talks in fics I get surprised

#// crow yaps #bombur #the hobbit #lotr #thorin's company

rutobuka2

I wanted to draw the LOTR gang as gamer boys 🎮

#wait faramir looks perfect here #they all do ofc rutobuka never misses #but like faramir is so difficult for me to draw so!! wow!! impressives!!#the understanding of form is also great again rutobuka never misses 🔥🔥

bochedogmeat

Dwobbit Frodo musings… also you know that scene in the extended cut of the first hobbit movie where Bofur gets up on elrond’s table and starts singing. So in the book of fellowship of the ring, Frodo gets up on a table amd sings that same song, stating that it was one of Bilbo’s favorites of all the songs he’d written. Which implies that at some point between meeting him and arriving at Rivendell, Bilbo took the time to teach Bofur that song. Which of course translates directly in my mind to them being besties. I need more Bagfur bestfriendisms like yesterday. Bofur is the favorite dwarf uncle(?) cousin(??) rivalled only by fili and kili. Amen.

#yayy dwobbit Frodo starts clapping gleefully #i loves dwobbit Frodo a lot he's always so cutieful

connieboldheart

I love making these - let me know in comments/reblogs where you'd sit! :)

#spot 7 in a heartbeat bro I didn't even think about it #cuz boromir and faramir actually LIKE each other yk. yeah it's gonna be a little awkward but I'm actually acting as a buffer for them #eowyn and eomer are squabbling like cats behind us but it's chill #gandalf and saruman keep side eyeing each other with enough tension to blow up the plane #but it's fine cuz it's low-key entertaining to watch #I'm also keeping a 10 mile distance from gollum and samfro #I love samfro but with gollum behind them it's likely to be the worst flight arrangement of all time #otherwise it's a bunch of couples that are gonna be making googoo eyes at each other the whole time and it'll make me groan in agony LMAOO #so yea. spot 7 #you guys are sorting out your familial trauma or sitting politely and silently and either way it works for me

Something I do think is really really funny is that Bilbo has turned into a man with 800 faces due to all the different sources to pick from, but because bagginshield is a uniquely Movie thing, Thorin always looks pretty predictable. I love my salt & pepper "decidedly tall for a dwarf" King Under The Mountain and my ambiguously blonde/brunette/redhead hobbit with brown/green/blue eyes that may or may not have a tail

#why did this also end up in the drafts #the hobbit #lotr #bagginshield #bilbo baggins #thorin oakenshield

Theoden said "why should we give aid to those who have abandoned us in the past" and in that moment Gandalf was transported 60 years into the past when a different, significantly shorter King was refusing to engage with the elves of Mirkwood (and he was almost twice as annoyed by it)

#gandalf saw a company of 13 dwarves and said “lemme bring a hobbit with me as a buffer”#and then Bilbo proved to be SO TROUBLESOME that when escorting 4 hobbits gandalf decided he needed at least 10 MEN as a buffer #gandalf is low-key my goat btw I love that old man so much #my gut pick for my favorite character is either Bilbo or Thorin but I'm also REALLY liking pippin rn #?? found this in my drafts idk why I didn't post it it's funny #the hobbit #lotr #lord of the rings #gandalf #theoden #thorin oakenshield

Wait ok might try rings of power again cuz I low-key jumped the gun and Completely lost interest when (spoilers) they called the raggedy mystery guy Sauron. Maybe he wasn't actually Sauron and it was just a fluke. A really annoying fluke that I dislike but a fluke nonetheless. Hopefully. Sweats

#// crow yaps

I will say my teeny tiny nitpick in fan versions of modern thorin is when they give him short hair. Give him his long hair back...

#part of me does understand it cuz yk #contextually he has long hair because its professional and royal in dwarf standards I know this #so contextually in a modern setting it would be short! because that's what is considered professional in the modern day #so yes nod I get it #but also BOOOO I LIKE HIS HAIR LONGG let him keep it #idc if he has to put it in a millennial man bun okay if anyone can pull that look off it's thorin #// crow yaps #thorin oakenshield

You know the LOTR trilogy is really such an anomaly when you start seriously thinking about it. If they'd released 5 years earlier, the CGI might've been unwatchable. If they'd released 5 years earlier, they wouldn't have had as big of a cultural impact on the internet as they did. If they'd released 10 years later, they would've been swimming in A-list too-pretty actors. 10 years later, and you'd be choking on the CGI every moment.* The fact that the LOTR films exist in their current form, with actors that aren't inhumanly gorgeous and with cgi that feels stylistic but not overbearing, and practical effects that immerse you so well you forget it's a movie in the first place... I don't think it could've been done in any other time period.

*(I love the hobbit movies and they do still use a healthy amount of practical, and I know WHY they went a little more cgi heavy, but it is still a common complaint people have.)

Sorta makes me sad to think we are NEVER getting anything like it again, but at the same time, it does make them really special by comparison...

#lord of the rings #lotr trilogy #lotr #the hobbit

Don't even talk to me. Mystery guy was decidedly Not gandalf. .......

#heartbroken bro THE GANDALF STOCKS WERE HIGHHH #I'm so tired of the “actually evil the whole time” plotline bro #// crow yaps

crowkenshield

I realize I haven't seen any rings of power spoilers ever so my mind is buzzing with theories about who all these characters are (I've never read the books so I'm not super familiar with names)

Leading theory on the man from the stars is that he's one of the wizards... LIKELY gandalf but I'm unsure...

crowkenshield

I like this mystery man a LOTTT... I really hope he's gandalf I'll be really sad if he turns evil or something

I realize I haven't seen any rings of power spoilers ever so my mind is buzzing with theories about who all these characters are (I've never read the books so I'm not super familiar with names)

Leading theory on the man from the stars is that he's one of the wizards... LIKELY gandalf but I'm unsure...

#always nervous to post stuff like this cuz I feel like some tolkein lorehead is gonna pull up and call me STUPID #it's okay.. I'll have my fun clueless theories..#// crow yaps

crowkenshield

Started watching rings of power on a whim. Disappointed by the lack of dwarves so far (only one episode in)

crowkenshield

DWARVES SPOTTED!! A little disappointed by the lack of bearded dwarrowdams.. but otherwise WOOHOOO IM HAVING SO MUCH FUN YAYY

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