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@cxparadisi
i just want transmasc art to like me. because it doesnt. the art thats supposed to represent me hates me, actively, aggressively, and enough that most of the time it doesnt even want to look at me, and eventually that starts to do something kind of bad to your brain. and sure i guess i can write a poem that likes me but nobody else wants to read it
something that drives you fucking CRAZY when you notice it is the absolute frothing at the mouth eagerness trans people who don't want surgery have to describe gcs in the most stigmatized fearmongery way possible. they can't say "i think it's fucked up that some governments require gcs to change your legal gender" (true) they HAVE to say "THE GOVERNMENT WANTS ME TO MUTILATE MY GENITALS. THE GOVERNMENT WANTS ME TO CUT OPEN MY BODY AND HAVE SURGEONS MANGLE MY ORGANS AND DESTROY MY BREASTS AND WOMB. THE GOVERNMENT WANTS ME TO RUIN MY NATURAL BODY" and its like ok. ok slow down. do you think the problem with mandated gcs is that it is a surgery. and more importantly, are you aware what you're not even implying, outright stating about trans people who do have those surgeries. if you said "why are you letting surgeons mangle your genitals to create non-working facsimiles of cis opression" would you understand why i've punched you
also it's frustrating that i personally try to be very deliberate when i talk about non-op transmasc peoples' bodies because i am aware both of the transphobic disgust with which people talk about them AND the fact that being non-op transmasc is Good Actually... and then that energy is not at ALL reciprocated lmao. like any of the tmasc bloggers whose Blogging cachƩ is in large part due to their celebration of non-op transmasc bodies ALSO build that identity off disgust and hatred for gender confirmation surgery. a few of them will offer token platitudes that it's fine if you disgusting freaks want to mutilate yourselves by wasting thousands of dollars on hideous disfigurements if you can't love yourself enough to accept your natural body(a bold and progressive stance, thank you all for that), but the vast majority of them don't even bother. you know, using the exact language and reasoning of bog standard transphobia but with progressive language. it's a shame there's no word for that because it can't possibly be a relatively common problem in progressive spaces where people haven't actually unpacked a bigoted belief(transsexuals want to mutilate themselves with useless disfiguring surgeries because they're yucky perverts/self-hating sexists) so they just dress it up in the progressive language they've learned(why can't you accept that medical transition isn't necessary to be trans?). it would defeat the point of this complaint to add a bunch of disclaimers about how post-op people are also capable of lateral transphobia and requiring medical transition to legally change gender is transphobic and like i just said being non-op transmasc is Good Actually sparkle on my brothers, because the fact is that i feel the need to disclaim that while wolfertinger or whoever is just drafting up his 239420348093284093284th post about how he weeps for the trans people that medically transition like he's trying to be the posterboy for the forms i had to sign a billion of before i was even cleared to meet with a surgeon to make sure i knew i didn't have to do this to myself. speaking of, he frequently describes a magical utopia where the vast majority of transmasc media representation is buff post-op bears and i would like to know if he has any examples of art depicting these horrible creatures, uh, for a friend?
it's funny getting top surgery AFTER phalloplasty because its just like so much less eventful. when you come in for top surgery they assume youve never been under the knife before ever so i had to explain like five different times that i would DEFINITELY know if i was allergic to general anesthesia by now
honestly what kills you as a seeking-/post-bottom surgery trans in the online transmasc community isn't even the open disgust people have for your body or how quick they are to spread misinformation bc mysteriously their trans sex positivity only applies to transition they personally want/are attracted to. like yeah that stuff hurts, the fact that every couple months a post about how it's TOTALLY FINE to be grossed out by my body and assuring trans guys NOBODY wants to look like me gets 10k notes sucks, but that's actually a minority of the problem. the killer is that disgust towards bottom surgery is SO normalized that, in general, people just assume that no post-op people exist in transmasc spaces, if they think about them at all. you're just left out of everything by default.
jokes? sorry, every transmasc joke assumes you have a boypussy and menstruate and the only surgery you've ever had is top surgery and if bottom surgery does crop up it's a joke about how you'd never get it. sucks to suck! fictional representation? no post-op characters exist and in fact any characters that mention their junk specify that they're non-op just in case you were worried about that. sucks to suck! fictional character headcanons? i mean, sometimes you could imagine that the shapeshifting characters might change genitals...? the medieval fantasy characters DO get top surgery scars though, so really it's just an excuse not to have to think about how gross bottom surgery is even if you acknowledge the desire to swap your junk. sucks to suck! positivity posts? nope, even ones specific to surgery don't bother to acknowledge anything below the waist. sucks to suck! discussions of transmasc sexuality? hahahahaha yeah no, those are even more inaccessible to anyone without a boycunt. sucks to suck! discourse about obstacles to transmasc transition? nope, again, that just removes the possibility that people could care about you since not mentioning you in this context means they definitely just aren't thinking about it at all. sucks to suck! discourse specifically about bottom surgery? congrats, people acknowlege you...... as a 3rd party who can't possibly be present and definitely fits into the .01 x .01 inch box they have in their heads of the Cis-Passing Binary Transsexual Male who only wants to get bottom surgery to lick cis boots, and "discourse" is kind of a misnomer because in reality what that means is "discourse about how gross it is that people think me, a trans man, might have gotten bottom surgery". sucks to suck!
naturally i need to add a million disclaimers about how i don't think transmascs who don't want bottom surgery are any less trans than i am(true) or that transmascs who don't get bottom surgery face as much transphobia as i do (so true bestie) and i'm saying this as a reflection of my own personal experiences even though i'm sure you personally have nothing against us genital-mutilators. that same grace has never once been extended to me though so i will be cranky about it.
hey i'm not talking about misandry, i'm talking about transphobia that primarily comes from other transmascs. also ppl seeking vaginoplasty/genital nullo experience similar stigma bc the root issue is trans ppl refusing to unpack the systemic kneejerk disgust ppl have towards surgery/scarring/prostheses
i feel like a lot of transmascs feel on some level that admitting that they are fundamentally different than cis men is an invalidation of their masculinity and it makes them go to bat for cis dudes as if they face the same pressures and societal expectations as trans men which ends up in them being very stupid and transmisogynistic because they come into conversations where transfems are talking about transfem eggs and the way that amab people interact with masculinity and transmascs join the conversation with "let men be masculine".
because trans men do in fact face transphobia for being masculine. masculine transmascs are constantly scrutinized and attacked for being ruined women who will never truly be men, with our masculinity being held up as a prize we will never earn no matter what we do and which we are arrogant and destructive of our natural female bodies in our urge to reach. that joke about how if bathrooms are enforced by agab the trans dudes who look like kratos are gonna have to be in the ladies' room ends before the punchline which is that those trans men either piss at home or are forced to invade womens' spaces which has very real social consequences including threats to their safety. trans men with full beards and male pattern baldness cannot pass as women to most people, so to anyone who knows or finds out your agab immediately knows that you're transgender, which means that situations where a trans person might closet themselves for their safety(visiting transphobic relatives, not having to come out to people who knew you pre-transition, trying to access gender-locked healthcare) are unavailable to you, so the non-op ftm with a lumberjack beard still has that while he's trying to get a pap smear and that joke about mom insisting that the trans guy wear a dress to the family reunion only for him to show up looking like hulk hogan ends before they tell you what happens after that. chasers who expect every transmasc to be an androgynous twink happy to perform femininity for their sexual gratification absolutely punish trans men who don't fit that standard, and your current partner preventing you from transitioning because you won't be their girl on command anymore is a well-known issue. masculine transmascs also get a lot of shit from other afab queer people, often even other transmascs, who also expect trans men to fall neatly under "women and trans men who i consider women" so they consider you a bad ending for a cute tboy who transitions too much, which makes swimming in a toxic pit lake preferable to existing in some transmasc communities as everyone politely informs you that they wish you didn't exist.
so like yeah, trans men do face discrimination for being masculine. that discrimination is called transphobia, and is why it is politically necessary for them to advocate for themselves in a way that cis men do not need to.
so why do so many annoying transmasc people add "and cis men!" into any posts they make about transphobia? why attribute this to an attack on masculinity generally as if cis men are also told by their boyfriends that getting bottom surgery would render them sexual pariahs? probably most of it is extending "trans men, being men, are closer to cis men than cis women", which is true, past its logical limit into "therefore cis and trans mens' experiences are interchangeable", which is not true, and they know it's not true because when they're called out for being misogynistic a lot of them will suddenly understand that they're a politically separate category from cis men. i am sympathetic to the overextending thing because spending your entire life being told that you will always be a woman often leads to an urge to frantically dig your claws into the only men you've been told are Real men and associate yourself entirely with them. wanting to be cis is a form of internalized transphobia almost every trans person experiences and not examining that can make you say some real dumb shit. i am not so sympathetic to them derailing transfem conversations that operate with the correct assumption that some "cis men" are actually women because, having staked the validity of their masculinity on being just like cis men, the idea that they might actually be women and especially the idea of having someone try to convince them to be a woman is painful and triggering.
counterarguments:
some trans men consider themselves closer to cis women than cis men or find the idea of forcefem hot: yeah that's why i said "a lot of transmascs" and not "every transmasc in existence", but also trans people can have complicated or contradictory feelings on their assigned gender which is why transandro bros who talk about androphobia like they're considered cis men will still understand that many trans men are considered women outside of just failing to beat the transmisogyny allegations.
a lot of that sounds similar to transmisogyny: that's because transphobia is a part of transmisogyny! tma people are also simultaneously held to the standards of masculinity and femininity and punished for a percieved failure to achieve either, and of course some of this is misdirected transmisogyny from percieving masculine trans men as trans women who don't pass. this is misdirected both because what works for trans women often is not helpful to trans men and vice versa so analyzing it as the same issue leads to suggesting solutions that only work for one group and are useless or harmful to the other, and because even if you're attacked for being a dude who looks like a chick, a lot of that transphobia can be avoided by proving you're not a trans woman. if an afab person gets accused of being a trans woman the main thing people do to defend them is cite their assigned gender, not argue that trans women shouldn't be barred from the olympics. this doesn't mean that transphobia against trans men, masculine trans men included, isn't real, traumatizing, dangerous, and often life-threatening.
medically transitioning doesn't automatically make a trans man masculine and is not interchangeable with passing: yeah i know but "transmascs who present as and are generally percieved as male" is really long to type and a lot of stigma against medical transition is based on its masculinizing effects. this is itself transphobic because it relies on the assumption that beards and penises are masculine while boobs and vaginas are feminine, but that is unfortunately what is systemically accepted and enforced.
are you saying that being forced to closet yourself is a privilege: not in any systemic sense or outside of the most general definition of "being beneficial in some specific circumstances with heavy caveats and downsides". like yeah being able to get into a women's shelter is better than not having that option but also being forced into the closet makes people kill themselves so it evens out.
feminine trans men experience a lot of this too: yeah "feminine" and "masculine" are socially constructed categories that in practice no transmasc 100% falls into one binary side of, and transphobia against trans men affects all trans men.
what about the assumption that transmascs face less oppression than transfems?: dude trans girls aren't saying that oppression is a quantifiable resource you are allotted a measurable amount of they're just saying that there is an extra axis of oppression you're not experiencing. a disabled trans man living in bhutan experiences more axes of oppression than an abled trans woman living in canada but that doesn't mean either of their oppressions aren't real, just that in comparison to a disabled trans woman living in bhutan they are systemically less oppressed. it's also possible that despite belonging to more or less systemically oppressed groups they as individuals could have any range of experiences from a pretty good life with a supportive social network to being killed in a hate crime at age 14. nobody in existence is on every axis of oppression, and TME means that you aren't on this particular exact one and nothing else.
but cis men shouldn't be forced to be trans women if they don't want to: and people who like astronomy shouldn't be forced to become astronauts, a trans girl asking a cis guy if he's ever thought about why he's more comfortable playing games as a girl applies exactly as much societal pressure to transition as asking a kid who's obsessed with space if they want to be an astronaut when they grow up. most of the time feminine cis guys aren't going to end up transitioning, as most people into space aren't going to become astronauts, but just posing the hypothetical isn't harmful and at absolute worst might be a little annoying if you get that question a lot.
just the amount of people who refuse to do basic research is fucking insane. you could spend all day every day explaining that phalloplasties w/o vaginectomy are performed by most phallo surgeons and people would just ignore you and continue lying about it anyway. the same with erotic sensation and the same with erectile implants. people are so committed to viewing bottom surgery as a disgusting mutilating surgery with no possibility of functional results that they cannot be bothered to make any fucking effort to learn about it outside of just imagining how terrible it must be. i will enthusiastically and cheerfully explain even what i consider very basic information to well-meaning or even just basically fucking polite people, because at least they treat me like a fucking human being, but the amount of vitriol people will spew misinformation with as if i couldn't possibly even be in the room makes it really hard not to respond to someone saying that they would get bottom surgery if it wasn't so terrible because of [blatant misinformation] [thing that hasn't been true for twenty years] [misinformation] [transphobic talking point] [direct insult] with "hey man fuck you i hope you die in a tar pit"
do you want bottom surgery
yes(cis)
no(cis)
yes(trans+)
no(trans+)
have you already gotten bottom surgery?
yes- vaginoplasty
yes- phalloplasty
yes- metoidioplasty
yes- nullification surgery
yes- something else not mentioned
no
you don't have to get rid of it if you don't want to! phallo and meta can both be done without vaginectomy so you can keep your natal genitals. you can also have a vaginectomy done later if you change your mind.
"irreversible side effects of HRT" all of life is irreversible. i cannot go back a single second in time
also i know what i want. i know the risks. everything has risk. i am already living! why am i living half a life because of what YOU fear? stop talking down to transsexuals
made a visual for this one šš
victim complex cancelled i can jack off now and i think thats pretty cool. piss standing up too. and of course, be uncomfortable in shorts
saw the "my top surgery went well" "awesome my bottom surgery is next week" meme with two transmasc characters and the artist had EDITED THE SECOND ONE TO SAY "MY TOP SURGERY WENT WELL TOO". does the injustice never end
honestly what kills you as a seeking-/post-bottom surgery trans in the online transmasc community isn't even the open disgust people have for your body or how quick they are to spread misinformation bc mysteriously their trans sex positivity only applies to transition they personally want/are attracted to. like yeah that stuff hurts, the fact that every couple months a post about how it's TOTALLY FINE to be grossed out by my body and assuring trans guys NOBODY wants to look like me gets 10k notes sucks, but that's actually a minority of the problem. the killer is that disgust towards bottom surgery is SO normalized that, in general, people just assume that no post-op people exist in transmasc spaces, if they think about them at all. you're just left out of everything by default.
jokes? sorry, every transmasc joke assumes you have a boypussy and menstruate and the only surgery you've ever had is top surgery and if bottom surgery does crop up it's a joke about how you'd never get it. sucks to suck! fictional representation? no post-op characters exist and in fact any characters that mention their junk specify that they're non-op just in case you were worried about that. sucks to suck! fictional character headcanons? i mean, sometimes you could imagine that the shapeshifting characters might change genitals...? the medieval fantasy characters DO get top surgery scars though, so really it's just an excuse not to have to think about how gross bottom surgery is even if you acknowledge the desire to swap your junk. sucks to suck! positivity posts? nope, even ones specific to surgery don't bother to acknowledge anything below the waist. sucks to suck! discussions of transmasc sexuality? hahahahaha yeah no, those are even more inaccessible to anyone without a boycunt. sucks to suck! discourse about obstacles to transmasc transition? nope, again, that just removes the possibility that people could care about you since not mentioning you in this context means they definitely just aren't thinking about it at all. sucks to suck! discourse specifically about bottom surgery? congrats, people acknowlege you...... as a 3rd party who can't possibly be present and definitely fits into the .01 x .01 inch box they have in their heads of the Cis-Passing Binary Transsexual Male who only wants to get bottom surgery to lick cis boots, and "discourse" is kind of a misnomer because in reality what that means is "discourse about how gross it is that people think me, a trans man, might have gotten bottom surgery". sucks to suck!
naturally i need to add a million disclaimers about how i don't think transmascs who don't want bottom surgery are any less trans than i am(true) or that transmascs who don't get bottom surgery face as much transphobia as i do (so true bestie) and i'm saying this as a reflection of my own personal experiences even though i'm sure you personally have nothing against us genital-mutilators. that same grace has never once been extended to me though so i will be cranky about it.
what would you most like to see in upcoming patch updates for phalloplasty?
second smaller penis under the first penis
fun shapes(corkscrew, ribbing, U shape)
stylized donor site scars so it looks like you bravely fought off The Killer
phallo w/o vaginectomy you get a dick bendy enough to fit in your own hole
you dont need the superapubic catheter anymore
semisolid ED is slightly magnetic so you can stick fridge magnets to it
QR code that bricks the users computer if they try to upload pics to kiwifarms
compatible with 5G
option for extra sturdy dick so you can do advanced CBT
nerfed cost to $10USD maximum
split graft site doesn't get itchy
other/non-op
the amount of people who insist that theyre trans sex positive while simultaneously being openly disgusted by bottom surgery or literally saying postop people cant fuck is INSANE. there are like eight incredibly popular posts on here that are like "society constantly tells us bottom surgery is great[NOT TRUE] but remember that its okay to be disgusted by bottom surgery and actually loving your natal genitals is the most trans thing you can do <3 <3" and then they're like Nobody tells trans people this about phalloplasty [link to catholic blogger]. i feel like theres an entire community of ppl whose takeaway from transmedicalism wasnt "forcing trans ppl to imitate cis people to try and impress cis transphobes is transphobic" but instead "actually my disgust of surgery isnt informed by living in a transphobic and ableist society its proof that im The Real Progressive" so now we have transmascs who are simultaneously viscerally disgusted by phalloplasty and also convinced that this is a radical counterculture stance instead of something they and the people trying to outlaw gcs can agree on. and like i want to be understanding of peoples preferences but also while theres nothing wrong with not personally finding phallo dicks attractive i dont think you can call yourself trans sex/body positive if you find medical transition disgusting and if the only reason you find transmasc people attractive is the promise of a boypussy and you refuse to understand thats a subsection of transmasc people and not universal then youre just transphobic
this. and also the notion that phallo dicks and natal dicks can even be so clearly delineated
going to the crane center in SF. ik you also had urethral complications so do you know someone with better results?
not sure if ur from the bay area/surrounding area but a lot of crane center people (as well as norcal kaiser) who have urethral issues go to Dr Chen for urological repair
if ur from the east coast thereās a doctor out in NY (i think) who doesnāt do phallo BUT does a lot of phallo UL repair. i donāt remember his name tho im sure someone will comment with it
This will sound like a joke but Iām serious. My first introduction to postmodern queer theory was stumbling on a televised talent show as a pre-teen and watching this woman smash soda cans with her breasts. When the judges asked her a predictable question, if I recall correctly, she answered: ātheyāre fake but theyāre real.ā I knew what she meant. Sheād had implants, sure, but she wasnāt just wearing a prop she could put on or take off. She wasnāt trying for verisimilitudeāher breasts were real simply because they were hers. Ever since Iāve been fascinated by the possibility of something being real and fake at the same time, and the truth that these arenāt static or mutually exclusive categories. I think of all the people who have doubted the authenticity of my faggy mannerisms, accusing me of putting on an act instead of being myself. I feel so much pressure to say that this is just who I naturally am, but this is only half the truth. I do like being feminine, I do like being over the top, I do like being tacky in the most delightful ways, and sometimes I emphasize these parts of me just because I can. We can choose who we want to be and still be real. Anyway as I typed this I looked up the video and found that during that womanās performance Dynamite by Taio Cruz was playing so good for her.
Naur but i was thinking about the whole ātheyāre fake but theyāre realā with regards to phalloplasty & erectile devices & a lot of the rhetoric around it.
Very commonly people will criticize post op penises as ānot realā but what does it even mean for a penis to ānot be realā? How can it be unreal when it is literally attached to my body? It is warm, it is soft, it can bleed. I can wiggle it around.
My body is real simply because it is mine. Even if it is āfakeā itās still very real.
are you planning to get the ED periodically replaced for the rest of your life or are there gonna be periods where you just let it not be working/have it removed eventually? also generally do you have any thoughts on being post-phallo when you're an old person?
Yep figure every decade more or less Iāll have it switched.
Sounds pretty cool haha Iāll have the (third) leg up since mine is manual and i wonāt need a little blue pill š
Team transsexual wins again
