average tumblr user

~ 22 she/her /brooke/ ~ the internet doesn't lie and I only post the truth ~ mostly reblogs ~

[pansyfemme]

yes im addicted to attention and orgasms and food and shiny jewlery and 7$ Iced Lattes. does that really not sound like an awesome lifestyle to you

[dankest-amoeba]

Locking up the vibrators at Walmart is crazy work, not that anyone was buying them anyways.

[evilvillain123456789]

step one: replace entire personality with open, festering wound

step two: contort absolutely all stimuli in my environment to relate to the my wound in some manner, ideally one which justifies random acts of unbridled aggression and vengeance

step three: marry a girl with generational wealth

[dankest-amoeba]

I got a new kitten yesterday and we gotta name her something silly, this is so stressful

[dankest-amoeba]

Came back to celebrate the ides

[swarnpert]

age aggressing to 65 so i can retire

[dankest-amoeba]

Im mixing vodka and pure cranberry juice in a 1:1 ratio because its all i have in the fridge

Its honestly better than straight cranberry juice

[leofwines-deactivated20250831]

affirmations: you are not real, you don’t have feelings, you don’t want anything, this will be over soon

[painless-innit-colourful]

she doom on my day until I was never meant to be

[aropride]

please god let chatgpt die out like nfts did. With a fast and graceless fall into irrelevancy

[bladespark]

Like to charge, reblog to cast.

[conservethis]

Casting with all my might

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

anyway re: the second to last reblog it is genuinely crazy how the default position in america is the sense that the military is inherently deserving of admiration and respect and early boarding on planes and discounts at fucking applebees or whatever just on the basis of being In The Military. they don't even have to do anything, fucking tyler who's 18 and just enlisted yesterday in a Brave Warrior of Democracy now and he deserves our respect. and this shit is bipartisan. you have to be soooooo far dirtbag left before it's okay to even lightly suggest that Maybe The Military Shouldn't Do All That, let alone that it shouldn't exist and that you don't think people should get any kind of hero worship for signing up to occupy a foreign country and kill civilians on demand. and it's doubly insane because the government so badly doesn't give a fuck about actual veterans, like so so so many of them are disabled or addicted or unhoused or whatever and they receive like. little to no support for it. but the CONCEPT of someone being in the military is supposed to make you nut with patriotism and if you hate the military it's obviously because you're commie scum. stupid ass theme park of a country.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

impossible to explain how hard my mind was blown when I started reading books from non-American authors and realized how many countries there are where a common and accepted opinion is that the military is dangerous and corrupt and full of shitheads, which by all accounts seems to me to be the most reasonable possible stance. it's like the fucking pledge of allegiance, you know? you don't realize how fucked it is until you realize not everyone is Like That.

[underwhelmingalchemist]

Tumblr has got to be one of the webbed sites of all time because sometimes you log on and it seems like the entire site has gotten really into stick figure juggling and you just kind of have to shrug and accept that that's part of the furniture now

[fluffle-system]

I guess we doin stick figures juggling now

[bynine]

tips and tricks to become popular:

take interest in the lives of others

be humble and admit when you are wrong

be encouraging in your criticism

secrete silk that can be used to manufacture clothing and textiles

eat aphids. you will be looked on fondly for removing this common garden pest

[thuesdaynightdykelife]

I love being friends with prostitutes and transsexuals and artists and drug dealers and perverts and queers

[enki2]

[nightcord-at-25]

(parent feeding a baby in the 1800s before airplanes were invented) here comes the nothing

[sexchangedotcom]

the laptop cd drive is a sort of dead wife

[pointnclick]

Someone is eating a fresh orange in this McDonald's. I smelled it and my head snapped up like a hunting dog. That smell doesn't belong in this wicked place