[yuri-alexseygaybitch]

Really the main problem is politicians have forgotten they can be killed

[oneheadtoanother]

[dwergas-deactivated20180817]

yesterday my roommate got mad at me because i saw him eating kit-kats and said “oh, so you’re a little kit-kat boy, are you?” and then i had a dream about him killing me

[optimalmongoose4]

That was his psychic attack

[coolguycy]

listen, i dont care what you think. those women singing to me on the rocks are beautiful and im going to see them

[mrspider-deactivated20221213]

I don't punch bugs but my boyfriend is 6'7" and 220lbs so I'll call him to get the bugs and he walks in and does his best new york gangster voice (he's British) and goes "is that guy bothering you, toots?" and then puts them in a cup

if men arent like this theyre worthless

[girlblocker]

‘i can fix him’ ‘i can make him worse’ well I can pick him up like this.

[girlblocker]

‘i can fix him’ ‘i can make him worse’ well I can pick him up like this.

[blennie]

earlier I was driven by madness but I had lunch so I’m ok now 😎

[dementedgnomicwizard]

[farmlesbians]

whoever invented the cover letter got absolutely no pussy

[memewhore]

[solarsyrup]

heard that the queen is spending some time upstate on this big farm with other queens, where she's got lots of room to run around and play

[pointnclick]

being six feet tall seems a little excessive

[pointnclick]

it seems the talls have found this post whilst they were rooting about the foliage with their brontosaurus necks

[guooey]

[valtsv]

i want to be WOOED!!! i want to be ADORED!!! fuck anyone who says it’s “cheesy” or “a cliche” i want to be ROMANCED!!!

[valtsv]

i'm not sympathizing with that character i'm sexualizing them get it right

[valtsv]

i know what they did was fucked up and evil but they're hot and it was hot so i don't care

[dhoomtwo]

call me a cd player the way im sitting in the sun and eating oranges

[dhoomtwo]

vitamin c and d. its a thinker