Dan's Project 365 - Journal Edition

I'm just a guy trying to be comfortable in my own skin.

[dans365journal-blog]

August 2nd.

Origin story 

Why did you start your blog? Is that still why you blog, or has your site gone in a different direction than you’d planned? 

I started this blog with an intention of showing that I can be comfortable in my own skin by answering various questions about life that I know the answer to, but won’t share because I am not eloquent enough.  I stopped doing it because I got stumped on one question, regarding my dream house simply because I could not put it into words.  After that, several nights came and I felt like I did not have my way with my writing.  As a result, I have not blogged in over a week and a half now.  

Despite that setback, I think that nothing really changes with this blog.  It is still a window as to who I am, but I’m thinking of ways to give my best answer on a really good night even though that defeats the purpose of blogging every night, kind of like working out come hell or high water because life is not all sunshine and rainbows.

[dans365journal-blog]

July 14 

Opposite day

 If you normally write non-fiction, post a photo. If you normally post images, write fiction. If you normally write fiction, write a poem. If you normally write poetry, draw a picture.

Bit of an explanation.  My current rotation right now is in 1858 at Seven Falls, one of the Broadmoor’s properties.  I currently work the grill station, after being sidelined for two months, being in the butcher shop for another two, and being a pastry cook for another two.  In short, I haven’t touched the hot line in six months.  

It’s a ribeye with mushroom gravy, vegetables and croquette.  Simple, yes.  But I remember my final for Skills and how I couldn’t cook a steak to med-rare because all I’ve eaten my whole life are well done meats.  And now, I can cook a steak to wherever I want to although I’m still working on it.

[dans365journal-blog]

July 13

July 13 Your life, the book

From a famous writer or celebrity, to a WordPress.com blogger or someone close to you — who would you like to be your biographer?

Anyone can have a way with words.  But if I wanted to have a biographer, I would have my brother do it.  He currently has two books out right now, Chance and Finding Summerland (Shameless plug.)  He likes writing as he finds that it is an escape from whatever doesn’t make him happy and somehow expresses those emotions into happiness.  That, and for him to know my life a little more since we’ve been distant these days, I think it would be a good experience.  I would only do it when I reach 60 or 70 though because for one, he can’t keep a secret to save his life, and secondly, I don’t think I’ve lived a life worth living just yet.

[dans365journal-blog]

July 12

Singular sensation 

If one experience or life change results from you writing your blog, what would you like it to be?

I had to rethink this question a little bit before I posted my answer.  Initially, I just wanted to be recognized for writing something real and genuine.  I still want to do it that way.  However, I want to publish myself into a more serious forum, like Thought Catalog.  It’s basically what it is, a thought catalog. From what I’ve seen, a lot of people read it, and a lot of people comment on it because everyone has something to say on a random matter.  After all, they are entitled to it.  So, that is my material goal.  Thought Catalog.

[dans365journal-blog]

July 11

Fandom

Are you a sports fan? Tell us about fandom. If you’re not, tell us why not.

The first time I got reeled into sports was when my parents wouldn’t buy me Time Crisis because it was way too violent.  As an alternative, I got to pick up NBA Live, I think it was 2000.  I got hooked on these games, and always picked the LA Lakers.

If you don’t know, the Lakers had a stellar run in championships somewhere around the early 2000’s (megafanatics can tell you what year it is, because I’m not gonna look it up.) But that team was great.  Shaq and Kobe.  I just fell in love.  So much so that when I moved to the states in 03, I kept looking for the roof of the Staples Center in ’03.  I somehow convinced myself that I was going to see that team play, but I never did.

Another team that I’m a fan of are the St. Louis Cardinals.  I often tell people that I don’t support the Dodgers because I don’t like anything LA.  But that’s false as you have already seen above.  The real reason is that they were the first team that I saw playing baseball, and even though the Cards had a loaded roster in ’05, everybody was rooting for the Red Sox.  So, I went with them.  And I’ve been a fan since.

As for the sport that I play the most these days, I loved seeing Andy Roddick play.  A fast serve, quick feet, good forehand, tenacious, and loud. Every time I wanted to try something new, it was something based off what I’ve seen on his couple of matches. Although I did try to mimic his serve at one point, that went away quickly.  But now, I’m distantly rooting for John Isner but my fandom is currently open at the moment in terms of tennis.

All the teams or player(s) that have been mentioned so far have been bandwagoned on one time or the other, which is why I always think it’s great when people bandwagon, because it’s just sports.  Sometimes, these bandwagoners turn out to be a good part of an athletic society. That, or it’s just a good conversation starter for them.  But whatever it is, fandom is always great.  Because somehow, it creates or will create one for somebody some day.

[dans365journal-blog]

July 9

Keep out

Who is the one person you hope isn’t reading your blog? Why?

I think that every thought that I have so far in this blog is crafted to that it would start a conversation.  Honestly, I don’t know anything in here that would hinder me in anything in any way. So for my answer, everyone’s welcome to read it.  If it offends people that I respect dearly, then I might take it down and slightly change my stance to it, but that’s not really hoping to keep people out of reading it.

[dans365journal-blog]

July 8

Barter system 

If the world worked on a barter system, how would you fare? Would you have services to barter? Would you be successful, or would you struggle?

I think I would be fine in a barter system.  If anybody is familiar with the whole “will work for food” thing, then that would be something I capitalize on.  

But then, there are questions.  How would I go getting food?  I’m pretty sure I have a lot of competition out there since there are many who are more skilled out there in terms of cooking food?  What’s even getting traded at this point?  Objects?  Services? There’s a lot of factors going into here like the Walking Dead where it practically exhausts every scenario in killing zombies (not that I’m a huge fan), but overall I think I would survive but eventually die because I’m an idiot somewhere down the line. 

[dans365journal-blog]

July 10

Earworm 

Write whatever you normally write about, and weave in a book quote, film quote, or song lyric that’s been sticking with you this week.

I write about a lot of things.  The reason why I choose to do something as structured like this is that it keeps my thoughts in check.  What happens sometimes is that I stay up too late, I got nothing in my brain.  At least, that’s what people say.  Really, that’s what my thoughts do – it keeps cruisin’, can’t stop, won’t stop movin.  It’s like, I got this music in my brain and everything’s going to be alright.

Writing past eleven o’ clock is fun, because sometimes it feels like a perfect night for breakfast at midnight and blogging for strangers.  I’m happy, free, confused and lonely at the same time.  It’s miserable, and magical.  When I write these posts, I kind of wait a day when I’m stuck on a topic, because like tonight, it’s time to forget about the deadlines…

Some nights when I write about a lot of things, I cash in my bad luck, sometimes I call it a draw.  I did it a lot in my second year when I overthought things.  Because of that, some nights I could build a castle, and sometimes I wish it would just fall off because Chef would just tell me to shut up because I talk in excess and do less.

Which is why I just want to use my way with words in this manner, it’s more fun that way.  When I have this feeling inside my bones, it goes electric wavey when I turn it on.  Whether I got sunshine in my pocket or good soul in my feet.

I can’t stop the feeling, because I don’t know about you… I’m feeling twenty-two.  And that’s always fun.

[dans365journal-blog]

July 7th

Rolling stone

If you could live a nomadic life, would you? Where would you go? How would you decide? What would life be like without a “home base”? I already am!  I’ve been to California, New York, Florida, and Colorado., so far.  A lot of my moves or the places I have been to were out of necessity.  For example, California.  My mom, aunt, and practically brother lived there, so I lived there when my mom brought me to the States.  

New York was a move that was based on me winning a scholarship in High School.  I was dead set on going to Johnson and Wales in Denver because I never, in a million years, had the belief in myself that I would get into The Culinary Institute of America in Hyde Park so I settled for the second best.  Next thing I knew, I was getting offered a two year scholarship to a very good school. It basically set me up for everything else that is currently happening in my life today.

Florida is where I did my externship.  I only did it because I wanted to go to Disneyland.  There’s other couple factors that played in that too – I wrote some externship dream sites to work for, and a lot of them declined.  I don’t know why, but looking back at it I would just chalk it up to a lack of experience.  For example, I staged at Le Bernardin and remembered putting some potatoes on a plate, not finding the green grapes quick enough in time, cleaning chantrelles, watching service, then catching the train home.  That stage still haunts me to this day… but there’s a story I want to tell about that later on.  It carries over.  But the nuts and bolts of me going to Florida was the sun.  I hated the winter, and I figured that reading about John’s Island that it was a reputable place to work for, which it was.

Colorado was a weird choice, but a good one at that.  It feels like it comes back full circle like I was weirdly destined to be here by some divine intervention.  The Broadmoor was one of the few companies I interviewed for coming out of graduating my Bachelor’s and something about it just spoke to me… maybe it was the apprenticeship?  That was probably it.  It’s had it’s highs and lows but that’s another post.

I already have decided on my next move, but only a handful of people know about it.  Nothing’s official yet, but I’m very excited to announce as to what it is when everything falls into place.  But right now, my focus is kicking ass in these upcoming days, because summer season is here and it’s always time to grind.

[dans365journal-blog]

July 6

Are you as comfortable in front of a camera as behind one? Being written about, as well as writing?

I’m trying to be.  I used to do a lot of photography and journalism work while I was at CIA.  My photography work stemmed from my Project 365 while dragging my camera around the place, and later it blossomed into something bigger when I asked if the school was hiring a photographer.  At the time, they were and I was in.  My pictures have been featured in the school’s website a couple of times as well as a couple of Mise En Place alumni magazines, so that’s definitely something to be proud of.

As for journalism, same thing.  I got to write a lot of interesting pieces, and some that I just was not quite into (sorry, Giuli and Jocelynn… don’t kill me.)  But when I have, it’s somewhat of a good feeling because some people read the paper and come up to me and talk about it.  I gotta go back to my scrapbook to see what I’ve written about though, it’s been quite a while.

Though being behind the scenes has always been fun for me, I’m constantly jealous of people I get to hang out, take pictures of, or write about.  To me, I see these people who grind and constantly make something out of themselves and in turn, they get rewarded with something amazing and they get written about, or get taken pictures of.  It’s kind of why I put my camera away for a while during this apprenticeship, and while I’m an avid social network user, I’ve put myself out a hell lot more these last three years in my apprenticeship in Colorado versus the three years that I was in New York, although it can be viewed as growth, or advertising myself in various ways.

I’m trying to be comfortable in front of a camera or getting written about because I’m working on the point where I want that to happen for me someday.  But for now, I’m always behind the scenes.  I’m enjoying the thrill of building 65 passionfruit crunch cakes in pastry, cutting 200 pounds of meat in butcher and teaching some externs a thing or two.  For now, that’s where my joy lies and if someone who I have met in the past has written about me for all the work that I’ve done, whether it’s shitty or great, I’ll take it because it puts me out there.

[dans365journal-blog]

July 5

Mirror, mirror 

Finish this sentence: “When I look in the mirror, I . . .”

Constantly think that I need to work out.  I still need to lose the vacation weight, but all that eating is not helping me at all no matter how much I lift.  My face looks fine, though.  At least it’s a start.  

[dans365journal-blog]

July 4th

From The Gut

Tell us about the last time you had a real, deep, crying-from laughing belly laugh.

It was in my current rotation now in pastry.  I was looking for egg yolks, and accidentally grabbed apricots… They looked the same.  I just lost it in the cooler.

[dans365journal-blog]

July 3rd

A mystery wrapped in an enigma

Tell us something most people probably don’t know about you

I had a hard time answering this question, but I think I finally know one…  

I almost lost my scholarship to the Culinary Institute of America.  Long story short, I was a bad student and with some luck, I got my second chance and stepped it up.  I guess I went so hard that they let me finish my bachelor’s, went to Spain, and now got a bachelor’s degree and an apprenticeship in my pocket.  I guess that’s something to be proud of.

[dans365journal-blog]

July 2nd

The Road Less Traveled. Pinpoint a moment in your past where you had to make a big decision.  Write about the other alternate life that could have unfolded.

My dad sat me down at the dinner table when I was thirteen.  He asked me if I wanted to move to the States with my mom.  I just casually said yes, because hey, what the hell? What a great opportunity.  Maybe.  I honestly didn’t know what I was thinking.  If I had not made that decision, I don’t know what I would be.

But, my alternate life, let’s see.

I probably would have continued my education at Bloomfield after sixth grade, and gone to high school, but I really would have been at a loss as to what I would have studied. Probably become a doctor because that’s what my parents and grandparents kept pushing me to do and I would have been alright at it, but that’s about it.

I really couldn’t even imagine the rest of that alternate life because I don’t have the imagination to think about the rest of it, I’m pretty sure it’s just one of those get a wife, and settle down situations which is boring.  

[dans365journal-blog]

July 1

Great or greatest What makes a blog great? What makes you follow a blog or “Like” a post?

Consistency and quality of posts. I remember doing the same project when I was at CIA, because there was so much to capture and write about, even if it was a dull moment.  There was a story behind every picture which captivated people.  I consistently put everything out there while keeping it concise which I thought was quality. Eventually, I got asked a million questions about the school itself, and funny enough I know two or three people in person who went to the CIA because of it – Hamilton, who lived in the room next to mine and is now a student at UNLV, and Jameson who now works at Jean Georges.  So, it’s a pretty wide world, but it’s still small enough that once you find your niche and become good at it, it’s what makes you great.  Not necessarily how many likes a post gets.  

[dans365journal-blog]

June 30

June 30

The natural world Describe your first memorable experience exploring and spending time in nature. Were you in awe? Or were you not impressed? Would you rather spend time in the forest or the city?

When I first moved to the states, we lived in Marina Del Rey in California.  Beautiful view, we lived a mile away from the beach and from all the yachts.  It was gorgeous.  However, my younger self was more wrapped up in playing NBA on the computer rather than enjoying that view, because I was not used to going outside nor I had the idea of independence.

However, when I did have that sliver of motivation to go out, I enjoyed the wind, the salty smell of the sea and the noises that the birds made.  It’s something that I always took for granted, because once I learned that we were moving to a place that wasn’t Marina Del Rey, it freaked me out a little bit because I was gaining a little bit of traction on the part and it started growing on me.  

But now that I’ve grown up a little more and have traveled as much as I could, I enjoy the city life more than I have the beach.  These days, it’s overcrowded, filthy, and too hot.  Call it overrated on my part.  Once in a while though, there will always be a patch of clean sand and a cold morning or a quiet evening where I can enjoy those moments that I once experienced, even though it’s in a pinch.

[dans365journal-blog]

June 29

No longer a mere mortal

You’ve imbibed a special potion that makes you immortal. Now that you’ve got forever, what changes will you make in your life? How will you live life differently, knowing you’ll always be around to be accountable for your actions?

Nothing changes.  I’m at the point in my life right now where I want to cook, work, get healthy, and travel.  Call it my version of GTL I suppose, but I want to work with every different kinds of food, different places, and travel to learn about those places.   I have forever, so why not?  If I wanted to learn more about Korean food, I’ll get myself to the best Korean Restaurant, then travel around the country to fully understand it.  So on, and so forth.  

I only said Korean because I have a craving right now, sue me.

But that’s the nuts and bolts of it.  I’m making myself a better cook by discovering different foods because I don’t want to pigeonhole myself as somebody who only cooks one kind of cuisine or get jaded because I do the same thing.  It’s fun doing it now, but honestly I couldn’t really do it with a couple strokes of luck and help along the way.