너무나 힘들어...

i kinda know what it's like.

[kinqisms-blog]

Whaddup whaddup! I just wanted to say, it’s my boy ( @daseotsal ) J.Seph’s birthday!! Go give him some love, yeah? You only turn 25 once, y’know. He’s a quarter of a century old now.. daaaaayuuummm son. Next thing you know you’re aboutta be 50!! Ahahaha. Love ya though, and forreal, make his birthday an unforgettable one, everyone!

[daseotsal-blog]

j.seph_ thanks to vancouver 🇨🇦

[daseotsal-blog]

tuansum:

“eyyy hyung, how do you know? are you the expert on koalas now? should I have brought you here?” 

whether or not he’s actually searching for koalas is debatable, sometimes it’s just a convenience thing. he came looking for some fresh air and remembered his past conversation with taehyung, hence him mentioning it as soon as he calls. he also considers that the other might be busy soon which means less time to pass casual banter like now. he must look silly, cap pulled low and whispering the word koala into the air, but mark has never been too concerned with how he appears to strangers, even being an idol. especially since the moment taehyung’s laughter reaches his ears he’s laughing too, holding the phone an easy distance from his lips. “ahhh seriously if I’m looking for koalas for no reason I’m going to feel betrayed.”

“did i never tell you? i lived in australia before. i’ve had many encounters with koalas. kangaroos too!” little does mark know, the stay was more alike to a tourist visit rather than residing in the place as taehyung always claims without fail. but mark doesn’t have to know that, or his confident assertion would serve no purpose.

come to think of it, if mark really was looking for koalas it wouldn’t be a bad idea to surprise his groupmate with a photograph of it. even if it’s simply a photograph. because such celluloid stills are conduits to the best memories and fills for the parts that a person misses. the brain can only recollect so much, after all. and when not visited, those memories will fade, just like your first imaginary friend as a kid or the song you sing to your grandmother when she was still around. even if the deed then was done in thoughts of another, mark could store it as his own. “no, go on. you should take a video too while you’re at it. it can go viral, you know? popular guy mark tuan hanging out with a koala.” he continues in jest, as if mocking his friend’s efforts. “i’m just kidding,” he finally says. 

as the laughter fades, it’s then that sentimental thoughts of a hyung comes rushing. “seriously, though. while you’re there, you should make the most out of your time. i’m sure you worked hard. it’s only fair that you treat yourself.” he smiles to himself, thinking fondly on the quieter moments of joy he’d felt beneath the struggle that comes with the curse of living a life such as theirs.

[keurush-blog]

He sits alone on the sofa, clad in clothes that might as well belong to the reality of two decades ago, with a lightened cigarette between fingers of slightly rough skin. There isn’t much to shield his bare eyes from the world, no glitter nor mirages, just him and his music – inner workings of his mind conveyed through sounds.

신효섭 “크러쉬”: singer-songwriter, producer, rapper general / literate / sfw account. reblogs get starters ✌️

[daseotsal-blog]

@pullstrings​:

“Today. It happened today.” A friend of Jungah’s who was a stylist for some company (she couldn’t recall, there were just so many these days…) invited her to watch the chaos of preparing for a set at a club. Jungah always considered herself a fairly early riser, but it was nothing like her friend who had been busy doing finishing touches all day. So she was wandering around, until he spotted him, and she desperately wanted to change the placement of this guy’s quaff. She hadn’t paid attention to idols in years, so she wasn’t sure of his name but he seemed older. What she did know was that the group was called K.A.R.D. Cute name, she thought. The lie she told about shadowing stylists starting today seemed to, at the very least, grab his attention. Losing her own friend to the madness of some other dressing room didn’t leave for much excitement backstage, but it did leave her a lesson to never work in the entertainment industry. This was too exhausting just to visit for the evening. “Do you mind if I… fix your hair, just a bit?” Pinching her fingers together and giving him a small smile, she prayed he would comply. Otherwise, she’d just keep staring at the back of his head until his group went off to perform.

the shiftless waiting had him internalizing, vision aimless and blurry though his eyes seemed fixated on the ground. it would be interrupted by the occasional sip from his bottled water, until after a while he notices everything around him. he was easy to style, and taking a peek out wasn’t a wise option so he would simply be sitting around for a good chunk of their time in the dressing rooms. even though he jumps up a bit on his seat, he doesn’t exactly get startled when this new face hanging around approaches him. it was just the silence that stretched prior to her question. he figures she must have been a temporary part of the crew for this specific event or it would mean someone messed up and didn’t get her introduced, in which case he would have to be acting as sympathy would require.

“sure, sure.” he gives her a couple of instinctive bows before smiling shyly, a little awkwardly. it might have been a bad idea. after all, he doesn’t know who she is nor does he know whether she was authorized to do what she was suggesting but what harm is there in ‘just a bit’ as she claims. “just a bit, right?” he tries to joke in an attempt to quell the tension that his perception was projecting into the situation.

[daseotsal-blog]

j.seph_😝😖😊😋

[daseotsal-blog]

tuansum:

/ @daseotsal let’s fly!

( sms: kard j.seph ) calling in 3, 2, 1

“Koala where are you, koala, koala.” his voice is soft, a little scratchy from the fanmeet but softer because he likes the sounds in australia more. he doesn’t expect to actually find one. for one thing it’s late, it’s the only time he can actually venture out the hotel without worrying about being spotted. even now his cap is low and he’s got himself bundled in the most inconspicuous outfit he could manage. as inconspicuous as black and white combos could be. it’s peaceful though and there’s a slight bounce to his step despite his caution. “koala koala~” he’s humming an unknown tune, waiting for the face to pop up on the screen.

he doesn’t have time to respond to his message as the call comes in just as he checks, ears now pervaded by the hushing tone of the male on the other line calling out koalas. taehyung would have never expected him to actually look for some. when he told the friend, “look for some koalas then take a picture so i can show them to jiwoo!” it was partially as a ‘have fun there’ bid to send him off. and half meant. one, because mark doesn’t seem to be flying out for leisure. two, because nothing compares to the real thing.

“yah... you’re just gonna scare them away.” he laughs breathlessly against the mouthpiece, shoulders shrugging in hiccups.

[stankard]

K.A.R.D - RUMOR M/V

[nojitsui-blog]

when will you learn?

[daseotsal-blog]

nojitsui:

just as taehyung shows up, exactly 5 minutes after his agreed meet up time, he’s met with the greatest glare jitsui could muster as he takes a slow sip of beer for that dramatic edgy-effect. “if i were a girl, you’d probably be five minutes early and not five minutes late, right?” even when he offers the man a glance, his stone cold gaze stiffens. however, it immediately warms up to the sight of taehyung and his eyes wrinkle in contrast to the piercing glare that was supposedly meant to tease him. “ahhh. just kidding.” another sip, and he doesn’t even gleam at the mention of the ‘brunette vocalist’, but a small smile seeps into his lips against the rim of his glass like reserved child. 

“i don’t really know. work has been the same. oh. i noticed that if i wear.. a pink bear pin as oppose to a blue one? i get more tips! isn’t that great?”  at the same time jitsui’s over looking the other man, but he’s sure to make it subtle. when he’s not looking in his direction, the boy would follow his gaze, tracing it to wherever his attention was. it was the fastest way to get an idea as to what was on his mind. with taehyung, who’s book was quite shut tight, he’s only made guesses. ever since they’ve met, which was a whole different story on its own, he finds that he’s not as open with jitsui, or perhaps.. with anyone? which he didn’t mind to a certain degree, jitsui had enough enthusiasm to make up for the both of them. however, he’d wish he could make taehyung beam just a little more brightly each time they meet. he’s still working on it, slowly.. but surely. 

“yes. it’s just the two of us.” even though he’s casual about it, is he implying that this was definitely a date? “don’t laugh at me, but… i don’t think i have the stomach to finish a single-served dish.” he leans in a little closer like he’s about to spill some serious gossip, “basswood’s the only food place in the world where they triple- no, quadruple the food portions. haven’t you noticed all the employees here are almost seven feet tall? it makes you wonder.” jitsui couldn’t even try to hide his ecstasy as he spoke on and on about how the food was the first of its kind, biologically engineered, or something. his face was steadily getting redder and redder almost as if he were hot and bothered, but then he stops.

“ah yes, what’ll you be ordering?”

the laughter that comes after the question in jest gives away his thoughts and yet with the smile still visible in his face, he blatantly answers “no” with a forceful shake of his head. “i was just a little busy. you called me up on such short notice.” he excuses himself. although true to an extent, he could agree if it was an appointment with an attractive female, albeit planned beforehand, he would have come earlier to give them a good impression. either way, he thinks pretty good of himself for being able to come over quick despite the circumstances from earlier. if anything, that should give a positive feeling in sungjin’s bones.

when sungjin shares something random like this, he gets stiff and it’s even more awkward because there was nothing his hands could fiddle with or his lips to nervously nibble on. i.e utensils, a drink or a plate full of food (even though momma always said not to play with your food). nothing that could keep him occupied apart from glancing around like a creeper. what was he supposed to do with this information? what does a pink bear denote? what does it have to do with tips? these were questions swimming around his thoughts before sungjin finally answers him with something he should have realized sooner. 

he simply nods while slightly distracted by the waiting attempt of getting a drink from one of the waiters. “and oh, that’s great! yeah, more tips is always good!” he twitches slightly as he says this very dry and generic remark of encouragement, much as it was late. it doesn’t really mean anything else but a body mechanism. hopefully it won’t translate to anything else. a shrug comes next as his friend shares his worry. taehyung, on the other hand, could very well eat a lot, but when the oddity of everything about the establishment was conveniently enumerated to him so he stops thinking it was a simply him tripping and having delusions, his naturally tanned face turns pale. “quadruple... se...ven... feet tall...” he unknowingly repeats the words that shock him. 

this fact slaps his entire existence when a waiter finally comes to his signal. he freezes, slowly glancing back at sungjin who had this eerie overzealous expression on his face. his eyebrows meets midway and then again, slowly, he looks up at this tower of a man hospitably asking him for what he needs. “i-i’ll just... have some water... for now.” he laughs nervously and says nothing more to send away the attendant. who knows what things they inject in their food and drinks to get it all in massive portions? this was the safest choice. now his attention splits onto sungjin and the menu; the menu that proves even more these claims his odd friend here has made. “i don’t know yet... what are you getting?” everything he says from here on comes off timid and nervous. this was definitely a trip. he’s only staying because of the philosophy he has about changes and unfamiliarity. “i’ll base off mine from yours...”

[wordsnquotes]

Don’t assume, ask. Be kind. Tell the truth. Don’t say anything you can’t stand behind fully. Have integrity. Tell people how you feel.

Warsan Shire

[seongful-archived]

♬

Send a symbol and I’ll write you a drabble inspired by the first song that comes up in my music library. [ no longer accepting ]

EXO - My Turn To Cry [ ♬ ]

“Why are you crying?”          “Because he can’t.”

She must be drunk, Taehyung thinks, but no trace of intoxication is visible in her irises aside from a salty rain-shower. Warm shine of brilliant ambers gradually subsides and all he can stare at is the liquid bronze, its tides occasionally glistening under artificial lighting. It’s not his first time at the after party; His group rides fast stream of popularity, after all. But to meet baby faced woman in the packed crowd of smoke and loud music is a surprise. She oddly stands out. She seems like that number which prevents statement of mathematical equality to work;

Why is this odd number in pain? K.A.R.D’s rapper isn’t well versed in language of women but the sight of tears is enough to prompt such an assumption. She’s in pain. I should- He should what, exactly… Taehyung turns his head as if looking for her guardian. As if this skinny girl got lost in a shopping mall and fellow costumers keep ignoring silent plea for help. “…Did you come here alone?” Inquiry slides towards Joohyun just like that drink she ordered a while ago. Rapper can’t recognize the vocalist; Dim lights and dark clothes are covering every inch of her body, tattooing her skin with black ink of the turtleneck. Heat emanating from every corner of the facility doesn’t seem to bother her at all because grey cloud of melancholy keeps imperceptible radius around her frame- Frozen.  She’s strange. Most definitely.

Keep reading

[tuehyung]

Can jseph make 5 different hearts? 

[daseotsal-blog]

rules: you can only say guilty or innocent. you are not allowed to explain anything unless someone messages you or asks you. repost, don’t reblog!

tagged by: @pullstrings tagging: i’ve seen this meme going around for months now so i don’t know who hasn’t done it yet. tagging everyone. do it if you want to, then tag me on it so i can check it out and ask you about it.

asked someone to marry you? guilty. kissed one of your friends? innocent. danced on a table in a bar/tavern? innocent. ever told a lie? guilty. had feelings for someone whom you can’t have? innocent. ever kissed someone of the same sex? innocent. kissed a picture? innocent. slept in until 5pm? guilty. fallen asleep at work/school? guilty. held a snake? innocent. been suspended from school? innocent. worked at a fast food chain/restaurant? innocent. stolen something? innocent. been fired from a job? Innocent. done something you regret? guilty. laughed until something you were drinking came out of your nose? guilty. caught a snowflake on your tongue? innocent. kissed in the rain? innocent. sat on a roof top? guilty. kissed someone you shouldn’t? innocent. sang in the shower? guilty. been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on? guilty. shaved your head? innocent. slept naked? innocent. had a boxing membership? innocent. made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? guilty. been in a band? guilty. shot a gun? innocent. donated blood?  guilty. eaten alligator meat? innocent. eaten cheesecake? guilty. still loved someone you shouldn’t? innocent. have/had a tattoo? innocent. liked someone, but will never tell who? guilty. been too honest? innocent. ruined a surprise? guilty. ate in a restaurant and got really bloated that you can’t walk after? innocent. erased someone in your friends list? guilty. dressed in women’s clothes? guilty. joined a pageant? innocent. been told that you’re beautiful by someone who totally meant what they said? guilty. still have communication w/ your ex? innocent. cheated on someone? innocent. got totally drunk one night and you have an important exam tomorrow morning? innocent. a total stranger treated you by paying your fare? guilty. got so angry that you cried? innocent. tried to stay away from someone for their own good? guilty. thoughts about suicide? innocent. thoughts about murder? innocent. how about mass murder? innocent. rode in a stranger’s vehicle? guilty. stalked someone? innocent. had a girlfriend/boyfriend? guilty. gotten totally drunk during a holiday? guilty.

[daseotsal-blog]

copy this post into a new text post, remove my answers and put in yours, when you are done tag up to ten people and also tag the person who tagged you.

tagged by: @bonappo @femmetfille tagging: @qeachez @theoutcall @prkjnny @araous @seouy @jnsomin @clementide @blindsensed @nojitsui @methcd

A - age: 24 / 26 B - biggest fear: failure, abandonment i guess C - current time: 17:38 D - drink you last had: water E - every day starts with: brushing my teeth F - favourite song: maybe leessang’s pursuing happiness with jo hyuna sunbaenim G - ghosts are they real: i hope they don’t peep me in the shower if they exist I - in love with: @kinqisms oppa saranghae K - killed someone: no... L - last time you cried: when i saw my mom again last year M - middle name: none N - number of siblings: - O - one wish: to keep on making music that i like and for kard to become big (that’s two but... yeah) P - person you last called/texted: eomma Q - questions you are always asked: “what is the ace’s role in kard?”, “do you get uncomfortable being in the same group as girls?”, “will you marry me?”, “why don’t you sing in your songs?” R - reasons to smile: family (including kard), friends, fans S - song last sang: unknowingly started singing shakira’s hips don’t lie just before this part T - time you woke up: around 07:00 i guess U - underwear colour: hahahaha maybe not V - vacation destination: somewhere in south america W - worst habit: snapping my neck? X - x-rays you’ve had: dental, gastrointestinal Y - your favourite food: sushi, beef Z - zodiac sign: gemini

[daseotsal-blog]

it’s harder than you think. no using google. every answer must start with the first letter of your muse’s name.

please repost; don’t reblog.

name. taehyung

animal. tiger

boys name. taehyun

girls name. taehee

color. tangerine

movie. tomorrowland

something you wear. trousers

drink. tea

food. tangsuyuk

something found in a bathroom. tap water

place. tongyeong

reason for being late. tired from last night’s practice

tagged by: @femmetfille @seouy tagging: @zijeon @woojion @chngha @seolestial @spvtnik @blindsensed @pullstrings @abstrction @seungwcn @xunwei

[jiyuous]

😍

✨ send 😍 for a picture of yours that i really like!! ∙ ∙ ∙ wuju like, @daseotsal? 

from ‘he oppa who i should listen to’ to ‘the oppa who should share his food’ - look at you trying to gobble down all that food. but on a serious note, this one is very endearing. it makes me want to scoop you up and wrap a warm blanket around your shoulders. hopefully, you’re able to get more sleep these days. if not, i have to go wherever you are and sing ‘oh na na’ and ‘don’t recall’ repeatedly until you fall asleep because it’s been stuck in my head for days. 

[daseotsal-blog]

apologies for the inactivity. been busy but not so much anymore since 2 days ago, although in those 2 days i been on the “other side” but anyway, i’ll be here for a bit and maybe visit for more days depending on how much i have to reply to.

also wondering how many of my followers have wechat and would like to interact with jseph. i haven’t made one yet for this muse because i’m not sure i’ll even have anyone to have him talk to over there. so... i guess this is a survey. do you have a wechat account? do you think i should make one for jseph? would you interact with this muse on wechat if he was on it?