Antonella

21 • roman catholic

[dear-orchid]

♡ Welcome

I am Antonella, a 21 years old historian who loves pink and books. Here I will be writing about the catholic faith, virtue, holiness, daily liturgy, some poetry, and random thoughts of mine. I will also be sharing about things I love, like embroidery, Sanrio and Jane Austen.

Here's a summary of my posts! 🐑

○ ATTENTION: PLEASE don't try to flirt with me and be respectful. I AM NOT INTERESTED!!!

[dear-orchid]

I talked to my priest today about my vocation. And, truly, I am called to be a nun and specially to educate children. Me and my mother told him all my story and, honestly, when we said I am a bit confused between marriage and religious life, considering everything we've told him, he showed me how I am called to be a nun.

And I am so relieved! My heart is at peace, I feel there's much less weight on my shoulders, and I truly believe I've found my way. 🤍

Now, I must only wait to receive the sacraments in some years. Until then, I'm going to read lots of spiritual books, to pray and to attend catechumenate. I am so happy!

He was so surprised by the amount of books I have and I believe I'm going to lend him some of them because he was very impressed and interested 🤭

Oh, and he loves history too!! Wayyy!!! I'm so happy we have something in common 🫶🫶

[littleflowercerise]

"All people are born as originals, but many did as photocopies." - Saint Carlo Acutis

Do not be afraid to be yourself 💝. Do what you want to do and be who you want to be

[atlantidea]

Ella Bruccoleri as Mary Bennet & Dónal Finn as Tom Hayward The Other Bennet Sister (2026)

[dear-orchid]

The way his eyes were glistening with happy tears and relief after he kissed her 🥹🥹🤏🩷🩷🩷

I CAAAAN'T AHDHWISJSKAHEJWIQOQO

[technoturian]

I love how The Other Bennet Sister was constantly showing Mary and Tom be just bad at things.

The way they were counting their steps while dancing. The stumbling over each other's words. Her inability to paint. His awful drawings.

I adore them. Just the absolute cringefail couple of my dreams.

[dear-orchid]

It's hard to discern my vocation during some days... To know what God wants from me (besides sainthood) and His plan for me to follow during my life. I feel like time is slipping through my fingers, yet I am stuck on the same place.

Somedays I dream about a husband. One just like St Joseph. Gentle, caring, masculine, loving, protective, leading our family with faith and love. Never harsh, never mean, never authoritative. Always giving me space, respect and room to flourish in my femininity and softness.

But then... I listen to other women, how they had terrible marriages or are still married and terribly unhappy. How most of them advice me to not get married... How most of them got married, hoping for exactly what I hope for but their dreams were crashed...

I wonder: is God talking through them? Or am I just listening to people I shouldn't be?

Then should I be a celibate and not get envolved with any man, giving myself to God but still living a normal life in the world? Or even more: become a nun and live in chastity, poverty and obedience, spending my life to give it as a sacrifice to the Lord through the service for others?

What should I do? I'm afraid I'll be alone, far from my family and unhappy...

My heart is aching, full of thorns I can't take off by myself...

[dear-orchid]

A Valsa dos Olhares

A luz dos olhos meus

Na luz dos olhos teus

Que são tão lindos quanto os de Romeu

Num delicado camafeu

Belos no museu

Do meu coração, se fazem teus.

- Antonella

[dear-orchid]

[leftoversl1ce]

'The Other Bennet Sister' - Theme: Books Tom gifting Mary books was definitely part of his love language...the act of giving itself gave him joy, but more than that, seeing how Mary grew to appreciate the art of poetry was truly beautiful. In contrast to the other women in his life, Mary studied poetry with an academic focus, approaching it with a genuine openness.

[dear-orchid]

PLEASE GOD, IF I AM CALLED TO MARRIAGE CAN I HAVE A MR HAYWARD TYPE OF MAN FOR MY MISS BENNET KIND OF GIRL???

PLS PLS PLS PLS PLS 🥹🤏

[kingdomreigns]

Jesus Christ is the best example of masculinity in a man.

Self-control, forgiveness, patience, sacrifice, love, leadership, ambition, responsibility.

[flamingartofheart]

Christ in the House of Martha and Mary, 1886 - oil on canvas

— Henryk Siemiradzki (Poland, 1843–1902)

[dear-orchid]

I went to the cinema all alone today. Made two friends: an 80y old lady that was very independent and a boy who shared his popcorn with me, commented during the movie with me and walked out of the cinema side by side with me while talking before we said our goodbyes.

The thing is: I can do things on my own. I am lovable, people truly like me when they meet me for the first time!

And now I know there's a slight chance and possibility I am called to matrimony, as I felt a pull towards the boy's actions.

I want to be taken care of. I want to have a date someday. I want to share popcorn with a guy I like. I want to steal glances. I want to hold hands. I want to simply be.

Thank you, St Joseph, for showing me that through the most interesting and unexpected way today.

What was supposed to be an afternoon alone, became an afternoon full of discoveries. I am thankful.

[dear-orchid]

Soft love and gentle hearts.

[dear-orchid]

Am I?

Somethings never change. They develop, grow, diminish and seem to die. But there's always roots... tiny, minuscule... but there.

I struggle with my feelings. All. The. Time.

Am i bored? Am i sad? Am i depressed? Am i truly happy? Am i numbing myself? Am i simply ignoring my conscience? Am i being scrupulous? Am i losing my essence? Am i, am i, am i?

Too many questions in my particular infinite, so little answers of my own...

I see days passing by, mornings coming and nights ending... but nothing seems to change besides the weather.

My feet become colder by the temperature. My eyes drier by the wind. But my heart... tighter by my thoughts.

It twists in my chest in an agony I can't control. My mind won't stop for a minute and I am not sure how to deal with it.

More hobbies? More responsibilities? Think more about my vocation? Maybe I am doing everything wrong...

At least I'm still breathing. At least, with this one single breath, I still got time.

At least...

[dear-orchid]

Afraid

I want romance

But i am too afraid

When will my heart stop?

Being so stubborn it aches...

Is it just a stance?

Or did I finally got

What my soul wants to take?

- poems by a girl

[dear-orchid]

I'm simply going through a vocational crisis... AGAIN.

Do I really want to be a nun or is it just escapism? What if I'm just called to be celibate in the world and have a normal life? But what if God really wants me to be a nun and if I don't listen to His calling I'll be unhappy? But what if my calling is to be celibate and bear witness in the world?

I CAN'T STAND IT ANYMOOOOREEE!!