I didn’t mean to fall in love with you
Book: Queen B - Choices (Universe)
Pairing: Poppy Min-Sinclair x Trans!Male MC (Beck Hughes)
Genre: Canon re-write (Because I can)
Rating: Anyone can read it, really
Tags: @dopeyouth @theymakemegayer @save-me-the-last-dance @poppysmc (If anyone want to be tagged in, just tell me)
This is me trying to write by and for the Trans community, specially FTM community, meaning, trans guys, but I actually took the liberty to use They/them pronouns for everyone out there who´s interested (Also, the name Beck was the most neutral one I could find, trying to use the cannon Bea Hughes)
If you have any comment, PLEASE BE RESPECTFULL and patient with me. This is also my first english fanfic and english is not my mother language, so… i’m sorry fo the grammar errors. I also installed recently Grammary, so… hope its worth it.
“Zoey, please… Can we just talk about this?”
Beck asked, sounding tired but worried while sitting in the common room. Their eyes glued to the other girl passing back and forth inside the kitchen, pretending to be alright as she made some tea to herself. Even Pepes knew something was off, that little ugly face looked at her with those sad cute eyes as if he was grounded because of something he didn’t understand.
"Talk about what exactly?“ Zoey stopped for a second to look at them, she was pissed, the tension over her shoulders was like concrete. "About how you always manage to take my warnings and toss them in the trash? The way you keep going on and playing with fire over and over again despite my attempts to keep you safe? Whatever Beck, is your life.”
They closed their eyes for a second, breathing deep. This problem started the moment Zoey saw Poppy in the room with Beck a few moments ago, and while the Queen B left almost immediately after that because of some business back at the shelter, Beck could feel their roommate’s disagreement so thick and still in the air that they could almost cut it with a knife.
"Why are you so mad about it, anyway?“ Beck asked, feeling a bit upset. "I get that you don’t like her and all, but…”
"I don’t trust her, Beck.“ She replied sharply. "She’s mean, she’s selfish, she’s a spoiled brat who is not up to something good and you’re falling into her web. She’s gonna use you the moment she has the chance and throw you aside when she’s tired!”
Something inside Beck snapped at that. Yes, they definitely did understand where that came from, for all they knew, Poppy made Zoey’s life hell since day one, treating her badly constantly. Even Beck was once a victim of the blonde’s anger and resentment during their first months in Belvoire, so much so that Beck thought she was naturally mean and a complete bitch. But, somehow, they had a chance that maybe nobody had before, to get to know her, and slowly they began to see that- maybe she wasn’t a born-bitch, maybe she didn’t know another way. Maybe she wasn’t taught better. Something on their chest knew that, deep down, Poppy wasn’t that bad at all.
"How-how can you know that?!“ Beck said, standing on their feet. They didn’t like a bit the way Zoey was talking about the strawberry blonde. She wasn’t there every single time Poppy showed them how much she cared about them, how kind and attentive she could be every time they were alone, and Beck was tired of all these misjudgments. "She can be mean and cruel sometimes, but it doesn’t mean she has something planned to hurt me! I like her, a lot. And I think she likes me too. Why can’t you be happy for me just this time?”
To their surprise, Zoey scoffed sarcastically, as if she couldn’t believe exactly that.
"How can you be so naive, Beck? Do you think someone like Poppy is into someone like…"
She stopped abruptly, realizing how bad it might sound.
"Like me?“ Beck asked suddenly, feeling hurt. All the times they heard people say shit like that, every single mockery and awful stares came back to their memory, making their chest hurt. The way Zoey looked at them broke Beck a little more.
"Beck… I didn’t mean it like that…”
And they knew, Zoey would never say something to hurt them about being trans, but Beck couldn’t help but feel a hit in the stomach. They latched their fists and looked down, clenching his jaw, waiting for her to speak before they let all their anger out.
"What I meant to say is… “ Zoey walked towards them, stopping until both were face to face. "She has been awful to you all this time and suddenly, one day to another she treats you right? You are different from her… In a good way, you’re kind, talented, and down to earth. I’m just afraid you’ll fall into her claws and come to be like her, or worse… That she’d hurt you badly…”
"I don’t need your protection, Zoey" Beck said, feeling tired of being treated like some fragile being who needs to be protected. “I need you to trust me. Poppy has made some mistakes… But I know she cares about me. I know it! I can feel it every time we’re together…”
Zoey remained silent as if she was processing every word Beck said. In the meantime, Pepes jumped over their legs asking to be held, Beck took him carefully in their arms and snuggled him against them trying not to hurt their rib as they felt him curl up with a whimper.
"I know, Pepes… Poppy’s a whole different person to you too.“
Just at that moment, Zoey rested her arms around Beck, hugging them by the hips.
"Beck, you know this goodie-Poppy better than anyone else on campus at least, so tell me… What do you think she feels about you?”
"I think she wants me,“ Beck said, petting Pepes’ head softly. That wasn’t even a question to think about, it only took them a minute to bring back all the moments together, every time Beck could feel Poppy’s concern and protective side… Zoey had a point, but Beck decided to bet on Poppy’s good side no matter what. "She really wants me, Zoey. She has proven that to me in her way.”
"Ok, next question. The real question. The one that matters.“ Beck could feel her taking a deep breath as if she were preparing herself to hear something she didn’t want to listen to. "How do you feel about her?
"I…” Beck thought about all those moments together, how that caramel eyes made them shiver, every time Poppy managed to take their breath away, her touch, her smile, gosh, even their fights, and that thunder-like personality she had… “I want to be with her. She really makes me feel something special, Zoey. This thing between us is challenging, thrilling, and keeps me on my toes but it can be a good thing… I truly like her.”
For a moment, Beck noticed Zoey’s face fall for a second, defeated; but then, she pulled on a smile.
"Well, if you trust her… I can trust her as well.“
Beck couldn’t really believe that. Was she serious?
"Do you really mean that?”
"Why wouldn’t I?“ Zoey simply said. "I may still be skeptical of Poppy behavior, but I trust you, Beck. You’re a one of a kind.” Zoey sat down on the couch, slinging her feet up on the coffee table.
Pepes barked happily as if he could understand the massive step Zoey just made, and jumped right to her legs, licking her face as excited as Beck would do it if they were a dog.
"No, stop it! You’re ruining my makeup!“ Zoey laughed while Beck did the same, defiled by the scene. "You are so cute I actually forgive you for chewing on my Valentino pumps, you little monster.” She scooped him up and placed him on her lap before turning her attention back to Beck. “‘Kay, here’s what you’re gonna do about Poppy.”
"Take her on a date?“ Beck asked, resulting in a giggle coming from Zoey’s lips.
"I love when we do this whole telepathy thing.”
"Really? It scares the shit out of me sometimes…“ They said joking around. "Like that one time when…!”
And because of that telepathic bound, Zoey didn’t even let them finish that sentence, waving her hands in Beck’s face while a red color crossed her cheeks.
"Uh-uh-uh… We swore not to talk about it!“
Yep, they both swore that. Sometimes, being roommates was a door to discover a lot of things about the other that may or may not be expected… at all.
"Anyway…” Zoey continued. “You’re going to take Poppy on a date. A real date. We all already know her lifestyle, but it’s time to let her know about yours. To get to know you. And if you’re really willing to trust her… You need to tell her about Bree.” Beck looked away, biting the insides of their cheek. That actually made their heart jump with a little bit of fear. “That’s the only way she’ll be able to find out where her head is at and what your limits are.”
Pepes lunged for Zoey’s fingers, but she snatched them back just in time.
“Not the manicure.” She said angrily, making him off to go to break something maybe. Beck followed him with their eyes, feeling actually amused by the interactions, secretly loving that love-hate relationship Zoey and Pepes had, it was quite funny. “Quit smiling, Beck. It’s not funny.”
“Back to Poppy.” She quickly said, avoiding Beck’s jokes about how she would rather have a broken finger than a broken nail. “You have to show her what’s going to happen if she dates Beck, if she wants it or not, is up to her. Just remember one thing: you are totally worth it and priceless. No more underestimating you. Trust me, there’s a ton of ladies who would gladly take her place.”
Zoey smiled at them with a subtle hint Beck couldn’t fully place quite right, but they didn’t read too much into it, their mind was off, planning a lot of ideas for the date. There were a ton of possibilities for hot dates, but almost everything was so New York-ish that Poppy could do them with any person. Zoey was right, they needed to show her their true self, they had to open up to her…
And frankly, that was really scary.
So Beck took a deep breath and started typing on the phone.
Ok, that was it. Beck had to admit it, it was always Poppy, the one who made the plans, he wasn’t fully interested nor ready at the time, like… really, who would ever want to date their bully? But now things had changed and so did the dynamic.
Beck snorted, but a second message came in.
I knew you were obsessed with me. Happens a lot.
Take it easy, baby girl. It’s just a walk. Don’t read too much into it.
It was definitely a date, but they refused to let her win this one over; Beck could be as hard to get like her.
Ew, don’t you ever call me like that ever again.
Aren’t you supposed to be resting?
Poppy saw the message but then went off-line. That actually scared Beck a little, because even though they knew she was busy at the shelter, their nerves kept on saying she wasn’t as thrilled as them to hang out, maybe they should’ve waited until Poppy told them she wanted a date or something, but again, where was their initiative? They were interested, so they needed it to show her what they wanted. “Relax, you were fine.” Beck said to them, even though their heart was beating fast. The Poppy Min-Sinclair effect. So they spend a little too much time reading the whole conversation, was something they said? There were no signs of anything, it was actually a normal-flirty conversation… right?
Sooner rather than later, the typing sign showed up, alarming Beck. Quickly, they tapped the menu button just to get out of the chat. They definitely did not want her to think they were waiting for her reply… even though they were.
I just don’t want to make something to worsen your rib. I didn’t pay a doctor to go to waste.
Same old Poppy, Imma right?
It’s going to be low-key, I promise. Does tomorrow morning works for you?
See you then, tushi face 😉
Beck let out a breath they didn’t know they were holding, as the realization of what was happening hit them loud in their chest. Beck asked the Queen of Belvoire, their old enemy, the one and only Poppy Min-Sinclair for a date. And she said yes.
“Well… here goes nothing….”
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