Keni
No title available
tumblr dot com
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
Kaledo Art
Not today Justin
oozey mess
Cosimo Galluzzi
izzy's playlists!
Jules of Nature
occasionally subtle
Stranger Things
Today's Document
if i look back, i am lost
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
$LAYYYTER
trying on a metaphor
No title available
No title available
Product Placement
seen from United States
seen from Saudi Arabia
seen from Malaysia
seen from Malaysia
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Australia
seen from Singapore
seen from France
seen from Argentina
seen from United States
seen from Denmark
seen from United States
seen from Germany
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Singapore
seen from Italy
seen from Brazil
seen from China
@denriawhale
i made your favorite dish. i made you something you’ve never tried before. i love you. i spent twenty minutes chopping. my grandmother made this for me when i was little. i made this dairy free for you. i love you. i want to eat together. the onions made me cry. i love you. i learned this recipe for you. i love you. i made this special for your birthday. i love you. i know you don’t like peppers. i love you. i love you. i love you.
//If you ever need proof that Ardbert is the ultimate XIV himbo, please remember that he arrived on the Source, a completely new world in which absolutely no one could feasibly know him, and still thought to himself: ‘I should use a fake name while I am here, so I am not discovered.’
And the fake name that he came up with, his very best effort: Was Arbert.
He legitimately thought this was a good idea. And no one had the heart to tell him otherwise.
Bless his heart.
i wonder what evolutionary niche clowns evolved to fill
Apex predator.
No im pretty sure they started as a prey animal, that’s why their pupils are rectangles
Short answer: They are physiological designed to be the perfect children’s entertainer.
Long Answer: They didn’t really evolve at all. They were selectively bred alongside mimes, which share a common ancestor, the Jester. Jesters are, of course, the domesticated descendant of Bards, from which the entire Entertainer genus evolved.
Clowns were bred to be appealing to small children who would (theoretically) be more interested in the clown’s bright colors, silly antics, and slapstick comedy.
Mimes were bred to be more appealing to older audiences, for whom color and simplicity are as likely to be disinteresting as fascinating.
This is a dangerous oversimplification. Party clowns were bred to entertain children, and many modern circus clowns are crossbreeds with high party clown content (the party clown’s bright coloration being a desirable trait) but the party clown’s gentle nature and poor reflexes makes purebreeds a poor fit for the circus. The ones you see in the circus are generally crossed with mimes or acrobats.
Generalizing clowns as children’s entertainment leads to tragedy when people think they can trust any clown with small children when many breeds are temperamentally unsuited for that kind of thing - rodeo clowns are notoriously high-strung, funhouse clowns can be mean-spirited, and while the evil clown’s name is something of a misnomer you should still never leave a child alone with one.
To that note. The ancestry doesn’t stop at bards. It goes back to poets! See a particular breed of poet back in the Gaels time were actually quite formidable. They were ruthless and unstoppable to the point of dethroning kings with their sick burns alone. In attempt to harness their power and strength they were cross bred with european writers who were already fully domesticated under the heel of the ruling church. This produced the well known bard with their shanty and songs while still maintaining a bit of their ruthless bite they were prised for. While never quite as effective as the Gaelic poet they maintained their popularity.
The poets however began to fall out of favor and were mostly wiped out. But threads of their heraldry can still be seen today with americanized poet cross breeds. While not retaining their classic power of the Gaelic poets they still maintained their respectable cunning and might of word we can still see today in clubs and spoken word events.
actually entertainer species of one kind or another have been present throughout pretty much all of recorded history. even paleolithic art documents the evolution of homo coulros alongside early humans
history didn’t begin with europe. humans and clowns have coexisted since the beginning
fun fact: while prevailing scientific attitudes tend to assume that clowns were predominantly a scavenger species, there is some evidence that early clowns & humans hunted together
This entire thread is a fever dream am I dead??
surely death would be more peaceful
Unironically, as a trained clown (no, really) I find this really funny because you are literally describing how these types of clowns historically came about IRL and doing so with surprising accuracy. I learned this in actual clown school y'all. Your shitposting is accidentally (?) real, factual Clowning History and I can’t get over that.
They’re still evolving
I woke up after sleeping for the first time in 3 days and this was open on my computer. I have no recollection of making this presentation
(A bonus slide I decided to make when I came to because I noticed I’d left out someone important)
op are you ok
hhhhh your art is so beautiful u v u. I'm wondering if you could do some references on backs? Of course only if you have time and feel like doing so o v o;;;
forgive my handwriting I HOPE THIS HELPS A LITTLE BC IM NOT RLY SURE IF IT MAKES SENSE also here are some pics of rl backs which you can also locate via google 1,2,3,4,5(nsfw bc butt)
banana boy
Why is there so much cotton in this- oh….
Physics: More pencil tricks
Source
i.e. why when you or someone else gets stabbed or impaled, you should leave the object in the wound until medical help arrives.
THIS. RIGHT HERE. This is an amazing example!!
If you take the thing out, they’re going to bleed a lot more.
SO. DONT.
News Flash from the Medical Help ™ — we don’t touch it either! Unless the object they’re impaled with is literally too big to fit in the ambulance, We. Don’t. Touch. The. Thing.
The only people qualified to Take-The-Thing-Out are surgeons. End of story.
Okay, but for the love of God, please, PLEASE, if you did, if you panicked and took the thing out…. DON’T…. PUT IT BACK IN.
Or else, congratulations, you just stabbed them AGAIN. I reeeeeally shouldn’t have to say this guys, but I do.
Congratulations,
YOU JUST STABBED THEM AGAIN
i feel like that last comment should be accompanied by a bill-wurtz-style jingle
I’ve come to make an announcement: Shadow the Hedgehog’s a bitch-ass motherfucker, he pissed on my fucking wife! That’s right, he took his hedgehog-fuckin’ quilly dick out and he pissed on my fucking wife, and he said his dick was “this big,” and I said “that’s disgusting,” so I’m making a callout post on my Twitter.com: Shadow the Hedgehog, you’ve got a small dick, It’s the size of this walnut except WAY smaller. And guess what? Here’s what my dong looks like! That’s right, baby, tall points, no quills, no pillows — look at that, it looks like two balls and a bong! He fucked my wife, so guess what, I’m gonna fuck the Earth! That’s right, this is what you get: my SUPER LASER PISS!! Except I’m not gonna piss on the Earth, I’m gonna go higher!! I’m pissing ON THE MOON! How do you like that, Obama?! I PISSED ON THE MOON, YOU IDIOT!! You have twenty-three hours before the piss drrrrroplllllllets hit the fucking Earth! Now get outta my fucking sight, before I piss on you too!
How do you explain to someone that this is your sense of humor
I was wondering where this was going and lemme tell you I fell out of my chair
bananas ROTAT E
banan a
rotato faster banana
go
g O
can u fEel it„ b a n an ba ?
yES FEEL TH e SPED
WE HAV REAHCED MXAIMUN VLELOCIPY
Are you okay?
who are you to accuse me
Item: Puppy Of Infinite Dust
When the heart of the card responds to your trust just right
#does this make kaiba kuzco #is kaiba gonna build kaibaland on top of Yugi’s gameshop
#can we turn kaiba into a llama
#does kaiba dress in drag??
i hate you all
“You threw off my groove!”
“I’m sorry, but you’ve thrown off the CEO’s groove.”
#omg would Marik’s shoulder devil be Yami Marik?
“Don’t listen to that guy. He’s trying to lead you down the path of righteousness.”
“I’m gonna lead you down the path that rocks!”
#Rebecca should be the wife
#Ok Ok but Kuriboh would totally be the little squirrel >w>
#The Big 5 turning into animals
“Get them!”
“Hey, I’ve been turned into a penguin. Can I go home?”
“You’re excused.”
“For the last time, we did not order a Magic Cylinder!”
“You know pal, you could have told me that before I set it up.”
#would baby kaiba have blue eyes white dragon plushies?
i hate all 126,000 of you
“Hey Yugi, you just missed your relatives.”
“Yeah, we just sent them up to your house.”
#Kaiba lines up all the yugioh spinoff protags in a line looking for a rival
“Hate your hair. Your hair. And your hair. Annnnd…”
“Lemme guess, you have a great personality.”
#And instead of a sewer crocodile it’s some sewer dragon thing..lol…
#The dagger on Bakura’s leg is the Millennium Rod
“Then I bet you weren’t expecting THIS.”
[SCREAMS OF HORROR]
“AHA!”
“Oh, okay.”
#So, when Kuzco gets turned into other animals, does Kaiba get turned into other monster cards, like UFO turtle and Fortress Whale since the big 5 got turned into cards?
“Don’t you say a word…”
[If you like these crossover redraws, consider buying me a coffee?]
when the heart of the card responds to your trust just right
#does this make kaiba kuzco #is kaiba gonna build kaibaland on top of Yugi’s gameshop
#can we turn kaiba into a llama
PLEASE CAN WE HAVE BAKURA AND MALIK AS YZMA AND KRONK?
#does kaiba dress in drag??
i hate you all
THIS JUST GETS BETTER AND BETTER. All I need is Grandpa as the guy who breaks Kaiba’s groove.
“You threw off my groove!”
“I’m sorry, but you’ve thrown off the CEO’s groove.”
What’s next… Bakura becoming a cat?
#omg would Marik’s shoulder devil be Yami Marik?
“Don’t listen to that guy. He’s trying to lead you down the path of righteousness.”
“I’m gonna lead you down the path that rocks!”
What would that make Joey???
#Rebecca should be the wife
#Ok Ok but Kuriboh would totally be the little squirrel >w>
“Kurikurikuri??”
“No nonONONONONONO-”
“KURIK URIRIRHR!?”
THIS KEEPS GETTING BETTER OMFG
Ok just go ahead and redraw the movie scene by scene
So, would the jaguars be Beast-type monsters or Dragon-types?
# The Big 5 turning into animals
“Get them!”
“Hey, I’ve been turned into a penguin. Can I go home?”
“You’re excused.”
Instead of a giant trampoline, it’s magical cylinder.
“For the last time, we did not order a Magic Cylinder!”
“You know pal, you could have told me that before I set it up.”
#would baby kaiba have blue eyes white dragon plushies?
i hate all 126,000 of you
it just keeps getting better and better.
Top quality content on my dash
@squigglydigg
Would the two guys playing a board game be playing Dungeon Dice Monsters?
“Hey Yugi, you just missed your relatives.”
“Yeah, we just sent them up to your house.”
#Kaiba lines up all the yugioh spinoff protags in a line looking for a rival
“Hate your hair. Your hair. And your hair. Annnnd…”
“Lemme guess, you have a great personality.”
# And instead of a sewer crocodile it’s some sewer dragon thing..lol…
IT IS BACK AGAIN
good god I wish I can suggest ideas to this but I know jack shit bout this show
Last time I saw this Yami Marik had just been added. Seeing the future additions I have to reblog it this time.
EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS
I absolutely love this shit.
Whenever I see people quoting/referencing/parodying My Immortal it’s always one of the same four or five lines. You know the ones.
The iconic opening paragraph, “Hi my name is Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way and I have long ebony black hair… (et cetera).”
“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHERFUKERS!”
“I MAY BE A HOGWARTS STUDENT… BUT I AM ALSO A SATANIST!”
“Then he put his thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time.”
“And Loopin was masticating to it!”
As great as those are, I’d like to throw a spotlight on what I think are some of the underappreciated parts of this classic work of fanfiction.
Ebony puts blood on her Count Chocula cereal instead of milk.
Enoby is canonically a weeaboo and speaks to her friends in Fangirl Japanese.
Harry’s scar is now a pentagram instead of a lightning bolt, so either he found some sort of spell to alter the appearance of the scar or he actually took the time to carve a pentagram into his forehead.
There is an OC named either Tom Riddle or Tom Rid who works at a “punkgoff” store in Hogsmeade and has absolutely nothing to do with Voldemort, he just happens to have the exact same name.
Tara somehow got Fred and George mixed up with Crabbe and Goyle.
The reason Snape doesn’t like Harry in this fic is because Snape is Christian and Harry is a Satanist.
Marty McFly literally appears out of nowhere to help Enoby travel through “tim” with his “tim machine.”
Chapter 11 ends with Hagrid singing along to “a gothic version of a song by 50 Cent.”
Voldemort inexplicably speaks in Ye Olde Butcherede Englishe.
Voldemort wears high heels.
Draco has a flying black Mercedes-Benz and a black MCR broom.
Snape has a Dork Mark on his penis.
Speaking of penises, Draco is apparently “hung like a stallone.” I guess Tara is a Rambo fan?
The Hedwig/Voldemort sex scene, wherein Hedwig is a male human instead of a female owl, for some reason.
Dumbledore flies around on his broomstick while holding a loaf of rye bread. At least, that’s what I think Tara meant by “Sudenly a gothic old man flu in on his broomstick. He had lung black hair and a looong black bread.”
Oh yeah, and Dumbledore is an Avril Lavigne fanboy, because of course he is.
James Potter’s “goff” nickname is Samoro, because Tara erroneously believes this to be the masculine form of the name Samara.
Draco’s singing voice is described as “a cross between Gerard, Joel, Chester, Pierre and Marilyn Manson.”
Tara’s brief feud with her editor Raven, as chronicled in the author’s notes, may or may not have had something to do with Raven borrowing Tara’s sweater and not giving it back. IDK, it’s unclear.
Voldemort smokes a “gothic blak Nightmare b4 Christmas cigar.”
McGonagall has the best insults, like “horny simpletons” and “mediocre dunces” and probably some others I’m forgetting.
Dobby only appears once in the entire fic and literally all he does is watch Snape and Lupin have sex, and then run away crying.
Sirius is referred to as Harry’s dogfather, and not gonna lie, even if it was a typo I think that is a genuinely clever pun.
The Hogwarts janitor may or may not be Chuck Norris.
Tara accurately predicted how Harry would defeat Voldemort in Deathly Hallows. No, really. “nd den hairy wil have 2 kommit suicide so voldimort will die koz he will rilly be a horcrox!!!!!111”
This line: “Snap stated loafing meanly. He took out a kamera anvilly.”
And this one: “‘Crosio!’ I shited pointing my wound. Snoop scremed and started running around da room screming.”
“Azerbaijan”
“Hoes of Wax”
“Tom Bombodil”
“Cornelio Fuck”
“Professor Slutborn”
“Preacher McGongol”
“Lumpkin”
“TaEbory”
“The Bark Lord”
“Vadermort”
pick your fighter
the ‘$1000 to go to Hawaii’ bride, the ‘I bought a $99 polygraph on amazon’ lady, or the ‘why was $200 so huge’ birthday girl
a lot of people seem to be confused and think the hawaii bride and the polygraph lady are the same but they’re actually 2 separate people so here’s all 3 in one go
the “$1500 to go to hawaii” bride
Ms Polygraph Test
$200 birthday
bask in the unfiltered nonsense of it all
since someone mentioned this and I had forgotten, a last minute entry fighter: “Squire Sebastian” lady
New to the arena, Kristie and her surprise wedding
Y'all really gonna pass up childless millennial Disney Mom?
my FAVORITE angry facebook post of all time
me staring into my dumbass dog’s giant sweet brown eyes as he tries to eat the hair tie off my wrist: if your head is so big then why are you still so stupid you big dumb boy? huh???
look at him! there’s nothing at all in this giant head! it’s filled with air and love!!!
Scoob and the gang have an existential crisis.
i am desperate to watch this episode
