f i g h t o r d i e

ashlee michaela choi. known as 49. actually 28. hunter.

[the-write-ideas]

Send me a △ and ask a really invasive question aimed at my character

[museinspo]

the-write-ideas:

They’ll have to:

Rate on a scale of 1-10 how much they don’t want to answer that question.

Answer that question.

[lestanjager-blog]

As Lestan awoke from another nightmare of Angelica screaming for help but he never quite found her, he had the comfort in that he couldn’t be the only one that had these nightmares. He knew he wasn’t the only person that had lost someone so horribly. He couldn’t be the only one here that lost the only last good thing about themselves.

With the usual panic inducing pep talk from his phobia, he was out of bed and getting ready. It was another day but at least he didn’t have it off, he was hunting today… with Ashlee. They’re relationship is that they had no relationship. He’s pretty sure the most they’ve said to each other is a few grunts and nonverbal sounds. She was the hunter he worked the best with, as far as productivity goes. Perhaps it was the lack of words that allowed them to work so well. He held nothing but respect for her.

He decided to skip breakfast, this area of the country had edible winter berries where he knew where the best bushes were. He’d rather grab a handful of those then eat more caned food. 

It was about ten minutes before their shift and he didn’t have much else to do so he left for the warehouse where their weapons were stored to get a head start on prepping his weapons for the day’s hunt.

[destructivemeadow-blog]

Ashlee leaned upon a nearby wall, just thinking about the day ahead of her. Today was a relatively short shift - and by that, she meant it didn’t stretch into the ungodly hours of the night. She honestly didn’t know if that was a good thing or a bad thing; work always both distracted and tired her, meaning her body would always find away to drift off into sleep, which she often found hard to do. It was like her body and mind separated, and while her body was busy snoring away, her mind was too busy racing and thinking to slow down and shut up.

She sighed, snapping out of her thoughts as she turned her attention to what the day would actually entail doing. The Hunters tended to work in teams of two or three, unless they had particularly large or tough prey to take down, which meant they all worked together like one big destructive family. Luckily today it was just a normal two-team today - unluckily, today was with Lestan.

She had nothing personal against the man. He seemed... well, a person enough, and there was nothing obviously awful about him, which she was glad about. She just didn’t find him particularly interesting, nor very forthcoming with small talk, which was basically the only conversation she had, nowadays. Anything more than that was bordering on dangerous territory that she wasn’t willing to visit just yet.

Her mind conjured up that same, nightmarish image of Alex. Time to get moving. The itch was there, and it was scratching with a vengeance. Prepping the weapons was productive but tricky, meaning she’d have to focus and not worry about all these stupid fucking things clouding her mind. Incidentally, when she got there, Lestan was too. Joy. “Need any help with those?”

[orenmacnamus-blog]

“Boring? Aye, I suppose that’s why most end up with a scrap or two and come to the Doc for some pain killers.” A small and thoughtful hum escaped from his throat, “Definitely sounds borin’ t’ me.”

[destructivemeadow-blog]

Ashlee fixed Oren with a cold stare - all she knew about him was that he was one of the resident doctors, and so far, he was irritating. Besides, he kind of reminded her of Max, at least physically, and that instantly made her not trust him. “Well, you asked about it, so I’m sorry if you don’t like the answer.”

[odeliahayes]

Odelia looked at Ashlee and stared at he with a slightly confused expression. “Is it not common for other women to be sexist as well?” She wasn’t docile or elegant looking, not like other woman from before. She was used to her mother scolding her for not being lady-like, or for her brother wishing she was more girly than so rough when they were growing up. Her jaw ticked slightly at the thought of her brother now, hoping he was still okay. Her one action to save him and her family was now the ruination of them. That guilt was always going to be gnawing at her, she wondered if she’d ever learn to forgive herself or if she’ll always be wallowing in the hidden guilt. Maybe she needed therapy.

“How’s your punching? If you’re the only woman hunting, you need to be twice as good as them for them to take you seriously,” she muttered the last part bitterly, remembering how the Governor had undermined her strength too. “We’ll start with weights, do you know how much you benchpress? Because if not, we’re going to find out.” She stepped over to the bench, setting up the weights on it before raising an eyebrow at Ashlee to follow suit.

[destructivemeadow-blog]

Ashlee raised her eyebrows, confused but interested. Perhaps someone can talk about something interesting here, for once. What a revelation. “...No, you have a point. I’d hope you’d give me a chance to show I don’t doubt my female counterparts before assuming I’m sexist, but I understand why you’d do so.” Her tone was less soft, more direct - she sensed being friendly but hollow around Odelia wouldn’t do her any favours, and she respected her for that. She wished she didn’t have to talk the way she did for people, that her words could match her expression and her face but they never, ever did. “You’re a female trainer, the only one I know of, at least. I expect you understand why I want to show them that they don’t need to think of me as fragile or breakable just because I’m not male.”

She could tell by Odelia’s tone she wasn’t playing around, nor did she take her job lightly, and that she’d definitely been underestimated just because she was female before. Ash wasn’t surprised; the Governor had looked at her like that, unfortunately, like he was taking a risk putting a female on the Hunter team. “Not very good, I’m a much better shot. Just as good, if not better than the rest of the team. I don’t have great upper body strength, though.” She simply nodded, though flashbacks of her doctor saying ‘light exercise’ ran through her head. “Nope. Didn’t do a lot of gym in school.”

[ofblairs]

Arabella saw Ashlee around a few times in Palmer’s Square or leaving the hospital. Her expression was what Arabella felt almost always on the inside, but she wasn’t about to admit it or sympathize with her. She respected that she kept people at arms length, because Arabella did as well in her own way. Still, she knew that she was being seen as a naive little girl at the moment, especially since Ashlee wanted something from her. Her lips pursed together, yet she knew she’d be civil. “That’s right, you’re Ashlee?” She asked, smiling sweetly as she looked at her. 

“I mean…” she frowned slightly, rubbing her chin in thought. “Would the scraps be okay? There were a few bad crops that we still have for fertilizer, I think I can spare that.” She wanted something in return, however. She wanted a good piece of meat for once, but she wasn’t going to be picky. “I can give you something better in return for… the same?” She raised an eyebrow, lips curved in a sweet look to throw her off. She was trained to be a business shark from her parents once upon a time.

[destructivemeadow-blog]

Ashlee resisted the sudden intense desire to roll her eyes. Even Arabella’s voice ticked her off - it was all light and fairy-like, as if she was in some sacred library or if she so much as spoke too loudly, the wind would carry her away. It was infuriating, as whenever Ashlee spoke she usually sounded so grumpy and hard to talk to. Perhaps it was jealousy, perhaps it was simply because Arabella reminded her of the way one of her friends had talked in high school; but whatever the reason, she instantly had taken a strong dislike to this girl, as irrational and unwise as that was. “...Yes, my name’s Ashlee. How’d you know? We haven’t spoken before, right?”

She regarded the girl in front of her carefully; hopefully, she wouldn’t have to make some sort of backhand or subtle threat to get the message through, though she doubted Arabella would actually get what she was saying. “I believe so, yes. We just really need it, and soon, the animals are acting  a little strange lately and we especially need more bait now.” She narrowed her eyes slightly, a little thrown off. “You want a trade? Bait for good meat? Just for you?” That could be arranged. She was surprised the girl had the gall to come out and say it.

[oliver-darzi-blog]

He nods slowly, trying and failing to look enthusiastic - interested, maybe he was, though it was unlikely - blinking at the girl’s question, the one that he’s always hated.

Why, Oliver?

The voice always sounds so condescending in his head.

He brushes it off and quirks his lips into a glitched smile - god, he really needed to work on that - he really didn’t think that he’d need to smile this much in the apocalypse - words coming out slowly as he tried to think of a suitable answer.

“Just wondering how… our food gets onto our plates… with the whole apocalypse and all.” He gestures around him, though the movement is jagged and uncomfortable, even for him. “Haven’t really been outside since the whole thing… and then some before that.”

[destructivemeadow-blog]

Ashlee watched Oliver with interest - not in that way, of course - since she’d never really spoken to him before and she didn’t know a lot about him. Maybe it was the way he pretended to be interested in whatever boring stuff she was spewing out cautiously, or the way his eyes looked vaguely glazed over. She recognized that look, unfortunately; more often than not, she saw it in her own face.

Oh. A smile. She tried to mimic his own awkward, slightly disturbing one and failed. She wasn’t good at false smiles either, unfortunately. Ash rarely ever smiled because she ever wanted to, it was always because she was just trying to fit in with whatever pointless conversation topic she was on or because she recalled a good memory. Memories fade and turned negative. Always. Ash smiled less, still.

“...I understand your curiosity. It’s a lot less fun than it sounds, plus some of the animals are... very annoying to catch.” She shook her head, a grim, far away expression on her face. “Wish the zombies were chasing animals instead of us. What do you do?”

[littletexts]

[margaretstmaur]

Jake was unflappable. At least, he liked to think he was. Raising his eyebrows, he played with the whet stone in his hand for a moment, then glanced down at his hunting knife. “I wouldn’t have offered if I didn’t mean it,” he replied gently. “If you want me to sharpen your knife, it’s all good. I’m almost done anyway.”

[destructivemeadow-blog]

Ashlee resisted the urge to snap at Jake - she didn’t care whether his intentions were honourable or not, or whether he expected something in return, she just wanted him to catch on. She hated putting anything in someone else’s hands, even if it was as insignificant as a damn hunting knife. “Do you not think I can do it myself?”

[rxtributionist-deactivated20190]

“That’s nice, actually - waiting.. this week’s been a little too eventful for my liking.” Daniel cringed. “I was just curious about your opinion of the whole killing for a living ordeal.”

“I’ve seen another Hunter come back  c r y i n g -” He snorted. “It’s starting to make me wonder whether some people are actually qualified for this.” But of course, most weren’t as heartless as Daniel himself; that was the difference.

[destructivemeadow-blog]

Ashlee stared at Daniel warily, not sure what to say in response. This week... well, she didn’t particularly care it had been so eventful. It wasn’t as if she payed attention to anything anyone said unless it involved or threatened her.

“Seriously? Who? They a member of the team, or are you not gonna tell me?” She shrugged, though she did agree. “Well... what we do isn’t for everyone. Shouldn’t be doing it if you can’t handle it, though. Hunting is obviously better than doing something ridiculous like farming.”

[crpgconfessions-blog]

[ofblairs]

Smile pretty, Arabella. You’re a simple farmer now.

                     Ignore the fact you are u n l u c k y number thirteen.

A subtle yet twinkling smile graced her features to the fellow resident in front of her. Right now, she was tending to crops, being useful as ever. Tonight? She’d be tending to the Governor, but that wasn’t anything new. Arabella knew how to play her part, she knew when to be utterly ruthless or behave like the good little ex-florist she was supposed to be. No one from her past was supposed to be here, so she hoped. She didn’t know Amhiel was here, she didn’t know that the facade she built up was going to eventually c r u m b l e. “Hello,” she greeted, hand forming a first atop her shovel as she wiped the sweat off her brow. Oh, how she was once glamourous. “Do you need anything?”

[destructivemeadow-blog]

If Ashlee had her way, she wouldn’t be the one from the Hunters who had to come and beg for some more bait for some of the smaller creatures that they were hunting. Of course, she agreed after a moment of being stared at by the rest of the group - she hadn’t wanted to cause a scene or draw too much attention to herself, of course - and had reluctantly told them she’d make the trip to Lily’s Farm to find one of the more gullible farmers to ask for some of their freshest produce for. Maybe.... some kind of deal? Good fruit, good meat? She’d never been very good at negotiation, unfortunately.

Ash didn’t realize Arabella was there until she spoke for the first time. The girl in front of her was pretty, and very obviously as naive as they could be. In other words, the kind of girl Ash often felt like yelling or making fun of, but obviously didn’t; she wasn’t stupid enough to risk her life here just because of some dumb bimbo rubbing her the wrong way. “Hi... Arabella, is it?” She tried for a quick smile, which came out like more of a grimace. “I was wondering, uh, is there anyway you could spare some of your... produce, for the Hunters? We need it to capture some of the more nocturnal beasts, you see.”

[odeliahayes]

Dark brown eyes stared sullen to the tattoo on her wrist. Her grandmother had a similar tattoo, and so did her great grandfather. She wondered Israel was in shambles like the states were, but she knew that there was no use in hoping. Her father and brother were out there, maybe they were dead. She wouldn’t focus on that.

{Go, keep g o i n g, 

                                   do not stand still.}

She snapped her head up, eyes peering unflinching at the trainee before her. She pulled the glove down to cover her tattoo, jaw clenched and chin held high. “You’re training with me today. Keep up. Do not slow down because the Venatores won’t. And if you crack a sexist comment, you will regret it.” Even if her accent was still thick, she still didn’t fail to sound intimidating. 

[destructivemeadow-blog]

Her own dark brown eyes watched Odelia carefully as she stared at her now-tattooed wrist - the same sort of way she had just after it had been done, honestly. ‘Number 49, you’re finally into Princeton.’ Cold gazes and fake smiles; not much of celebration nor a welcoming for being accepted into Princeton, finally. She’d felt not relief but a strange sort of eagerness when she’d walked in the first time... but no matter, now. She was in. She had to prove herself. Hopefully, Odelia would help her do that.

It was obvious, even before she opened her mouth, that she was going to take no shit from Ash, which she couldn’t help but respect. It irritated her also, but she wasn’t dumb enough to let that show. “Sexist comment? You do realize we’re both female, right? And I’m the only female hunter currently?” Ash’s tone was vaguely amused, which was a first for her - at least, while talking to someone here. “Where do we start?”

[destructivemeadow-blog]

“Hunting? It’s... you know, mainly filled with waiting. It’s pretty boring for most of the time. Why?”

[margaretstmaur]

“Hey, do you want some help with that? I’m pretty good with my hands, and I don’t mind at all.”

[destructivemeadow-blog]

Ashlee eyed Jake suspiciously, her typical ‘I can do it myself’ attitude shining through as usual. “...No. Thanks. You probably have something better to do.”

[justanotherrpmeme]

bold which habits your muse has

nail biting | throat clearing | lying | interrupting | chewing the ends of pens | smoking | swearing | knuckle cracking | thumb sucking | muttering under their breath | talking to themselves | nose picking | binge drinking | oversleeping | snacking between meals | skipping meals | picking at skin | impulse buying | talking with their mouth full | humming/singing to themselves | chewing gum | leg jiggling | foot tapping | hair twirling | whistling | eye rolling | licking lips | sniffing | squinting | rubbing hands together | jaw clenching | gesturing while talking | putting feet up on tables | tucking hair behind ears | chewing lips | crossing arms over chest | putting hands on hips | rubbing the back or their neck | being late | procrastinating | doodling | shredding paper | peeling off bottle labels | forgetfulness | running hands through hair | overreacting | teeth grinding | nostril flaring | slouching | pacing | drumming fingers | fist clenching | pinching bridge of nose | rubbing temples | rolling shoulders

[destructivemeadow-blog]

      Ashlee had had enough of all these goddamn fucking nightmares. Every time she closed her eyes, her mind conjured up more and more horrific images she couldn’t seem to shake off. Alex, bloody and bruised on the concrete floor. Alex, walking among the undead. Alex, cursing Ash for leaving her behind like some sort of coward. Her mind hurt like hell, though her body was positively pumping to get going. It was one of her problems; the disconnection of the mind and the body, causing a bizarre, crippling numbing effect.

      Sleeping wasn’t restful. The pathetic small talk she engaged in daily wasn’t restful. Killing animals and working with a team of annoying, two-dimensional men wasn’t restful. Nothing was restful, anymore. The only option was to keep moving, and suffer through it. Those things starred in her daily thoughts - Keep moving. Suffer through it. Here, she had no roots or meaningful connections, for that she was grateful. She was number 49; just another walking resource for the Governor to exploit and keep in love. She hated them all, of course. Every single person she’d met here had been fake, disingenuous or just plain stupid.

                        (At least, that’s what she S A I D  to herself to keep things nice and simple;)

      So, this was life now. She slept on a hard mattress, with hard pillows and a hard duvet, to dream hard things and would awake to a hard life. She felt particularly groggy this morning, as she lazed around for a moment in her small apartment - she’d taken anything that wasn’t communal, no matter the location or the size. Being forced to live with someone, to sleep and eat and speak and be with someone else for the majority of the time was nauseating. Better this way. Nothing left. She tugged on her well-worn boots finally, opting to try and find something more substantial for breakfast than water.  She wouldn’t have bothered with it otherwise, but she wasn’t stupid - Ash saw what the Governor was doing. If she fell or became too much of a nuisance, she’d be swiftly and duly punished. 

     She wiped sleep out of her eyes as she finally got out to Palmer’s Square - the sun was glaring down on it, though it was still a cold winter’s morning. When she exhaled it looked almost like she was smoking a cigarette. Impossible, of course - Ash had never been a smoker nor had she the luxury of even possessing such a thing. Alcohol, drugs, sex... none of it appealed to her like it seemed to other people. She just wanted to live, and feel as if she was alive. She had... say, thirty minutes before she started her shift? 

[doona-baes]