..Out Of All The McFuckin Things..

howdy yall im a fucking MESS thomas jefferson was a little bitch my name isnt roger but uhhh call me roger or not-roger use any pronouns ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ please feel free to ask if you need me to tag something

[zhewhoisfate]

Me, watching my mutuals speak other languages, not understanding a single word: fucking superb you funky little bilinguals

[thembofication]

אני אוהב אותך!!!

[zhewhoisfate]

Me, sobbing: fucfink sup erbb,

[silverhawk]

can you imagine how freaky shark mermaids would be like unlike sharks, shark mermaids would have actual arms/hands and could rely on touching things with their hands to see if they’re prey rather than having to bite like sharks do. like youre just swimming in the ocean and suddenly you feel a strong grip on your leg, you freak the FUCK out because uh what????? the fuck??? youre swimming alone in the ocean??

a head pops out of the water, dorsal fin pointed from its back and it just points at you and says in a low whisper: “i thought you were a seal. please dont swim alone like this, im sorry i scared you i just wanted to see what you are” and then disappears back into the depth. what the fuck.

[aboxfullofocs]

I accept this headcannon.

[greelin]

what you said was very sweet and means a lot to me but i am incapable of properly responding in any way besides “thank you so much aaaah” because i do not know how to accurately express the exact level of my gratitude to where you completely understand how much what you said meant to me without me getting even more emotional and looking like a fucking nerd: an autobiography

[madejsbridge]

[cockyhorror]

I keep going back to watch this video it just captures my sense of humour perfectly

[shanexrayn]

Demön

[recreationalcannibalism]

I hate this. Things like this scare the shit out of me. Yes a parent should be protective. No they should not STALK their child. Yes a parent can get upset at a child. No they should not flip out or let their anger make them out of control, or take out their anger on their child. Yes a parent can lecture and maybe the kid feels like their parent is driving them crazy - but after the last two statements forgive me if I don’t exactly trust these definitions. A parent should never be their child’s worst nightmare. A pain sometimes, ok, but not a nightmare. And the idea of a parent “stalking” and “hunting down” their child is horrifying. If you were a good parent, maybe your child would have communicated whereabouts upfront with you already. And the last statement is the worst. “I will subject you to terror and treat you like my property…. Because I love you!” No one would ever put up with this from a partner, a friend, even a grandparent…. Why is it suddenly okay from a parent?

Fuck toxic parenting.

[prince-snoozy]

That graphic is basically acting like emotional and psychological abuse is okay as long as it’s framed as “it’s because I love you.” Which is basically part of the abuse cycle.

[carryondontlookhere]

Abuse is not justified by “love.” Period.

[devil-delta-deactivated20190915]

“I love these characters!” I say as I make the most depressing headcanons for them

“They are pure and filled with sunshine!” I say as a draw them crying and in pain.

“I must protect them at all cost” I say as a make them suffer.

[devil-delta-deactivated20190915]

This is still fucking accurate

[ao3tagoftheday]

[Image Description: Tag reading “on today’s list of things I’ll regret in the near future”]

The AO3 Tag of the Day is: The entire bag of stale tortilla chips I’m going to eat instead of having an actual meal

[uhhhhnvm-deactivated20210202]

phil’s ig story

i thought that was gonna be selfie

(it’s transparent!)

please don’t repost, reblogs appreciated!

[jauregxis]

[bob-belcher]

Who needs Meghan Trainor’s “NO” when there’s this masterpiece?

[vampirezigzagoon]

I THINK YOU COULD USE A MINT

[shezasag]

this is literally honestly a fucking bop

[pivotpivotpivot-archive]

Hey, how you doin’?

[the-bride-of-adventure]

“Finally a role where I do not have to carry a gun, I am not in a gang, I’m not selling drugs. I’m just a normal human being who happens to be hispanic and happens to live in this wonderful place called Washington Heights.”

- Robin De Jesús, about playing Sonny in In the Heights.

[just-shower-thoughts]

Maybe medieval people happened upon a T-Rex fossil and came to a relatively logical conclusion that dragons existed.

[beedlebeeb]

I’ve read a couple books on this actually, thats exactly what happened. Also cyclops are from looking at bones from a certain type of baby elephant. The giant note hole and tiny eyes made it look like a single eye.

[awed-frog]

Yep, can confirm! And what’s even funnier to me is that back in the dark ages, Greek people used to find a lot of prehistoric bear skeletons - and those look exactly like human skeletons, except they’re like eight feet tall or something - so they naturally assumed those were the heroes of legend, and made armour and clothes for them and reburied them with the most splendid and sacred religious ceremonies they could think of? Fast forward five centuries, Athens’ all modern and rational, philosophers and scientists aren’t taking any shit from anyone - but the problem is, people will randomly find graves containing giant-ass warriors, so that’s something that can’t be explained away and yeah, demigods were a thing and yeah, they used to be eight feet tall and sorry I don’t make the rules.

[memewhore]

[outofcontextdiscord]

pumperdickel bread

[outofcontextdiscord]

wait.

This was not meant for this blog.

fuck.

[blelbinems-deactivated20190925]

Power move: McElroy’s skipping episode 420 of one of their podcasts because they didn’t want to do an hour of weed jokes, but leave us open to an attack of a retroactive release of episode 420 at any given time with no warning when they know how they’re gonna thread that needle

[devoid-of-everything]

It is so fucking exhausting fighting your brain every day dude

[jesse-everlasting-tuck]

Winnie: if you were an animal you’d be an enchilada

Miles: I think you mean echidna

Jesse: Miles, let the woman speak!