nothing but honey

Bee | (Actually a doctor) | 27 | She/her. I used to be incredibly tumblr prolific but now I'm too lazy . Follow for occasional bursts of puppies, baking, and gay shit, I guess. In love with my life, my couch, my girl, and my doggo. 100000% willing to be your mom friend 5ever. My doggo has his own tumblr. Please love him: @beausregards. He is the cutest. Sidebar image by Katie Daisy.

[doctorbee]

Haven’t logged into my tumblr for like 4 years. Also love that my profile says I’m 27.

But. Was vaguely on writer twitter for the past year and it wasn’t great and mostly made me miss tumblr so ta-da. I’m 27 again.

(I’m gonna need to get out a calculator to know how old I actually am, but I know it’s not 27.)

[doctorbee]

a wild bee appears!  (& she promptly disappears again)

Apparently my last major update post was this one and hey everything needs an update there!!

Work now includes Significantly Higher Burnout, but I’m managing.  The majority of my job can be described as “putting out fires everywhere”.  Research is chaotic.  Academics like to do whatever they want and figure it out later.  My job is wrangling them all.  It’s rough sometimes.  I do still enjoy my work some of the time, just maybe not as enthusiastically and wholeheartedly as before.  However, I have been pushing my bosses to let me get more involved in community outreach and science communication, and FINALLY I’m starting to be heard a little, so optimistic there.  Got do speak at an outreach event this week and was very well received and it made me happy.  My bosses still are incredibly appreciative and supportive of me, but also nobody actually knows exactly what I do so they don’t understand the underlying causes when I’m overwhelmed or stressed.  However, I ask and I receive whatever I want, so I now have my own assistant.  She is also my closest friend now and honestly the reason I am still a functional human being, in all aspects of my life.  We spend more time with each other than anyone else in our respective lives, but in a good way.

I also have applied to become a volunteer at the local science museum because if I can’t get it through work, I still want to be sharing science somewhere.  Haven’t finished that process yet (started with fingerprinting, then a few more steps), but YOU GUYS.  THEY HAVE SCIENCE BIRTHDAY PARTIES.   Gonna volunteer at those and meet all the children who are modern versions of me as a kid.

Beau is a majestic and noble petite gremlin, as always.  We did agility training for a while and it was going really well.  He made huge progress and really gained a lot of confidence and lost a lot of fearfulness.  Unfortunately, the building that housed our agility gym was purchased by new owners who decided to replace the agility business with a pot growing facility.  We’re still waiting for the agility folks to find a new location.  But Beau is still doing great and he’s still crooked and I still love him more than all of everything in all of existence.

Supergirl moved to California!  She moved in May, while I was in the Netherlands for a conference.  (By the way, I went to the Netherlands!  For free!  Because work!  The furthest I’ve previously ever been outside the U.S. was Toronto which is like 2 feet from the border.)  She now has her own apartment, and she works for a non-profit tree foundation that works to increase “urban forests”.  TREES IN CITIES.  It’s perfect.  She works on a program that provides free trees to anyone who asks.  I get my free trees next month.

Where will I put those trees, you ask?  AT MY HOUSE.  THAT I OWN.  BECAUSE I FUCKING BOUGHT A HOUSE LIKE A GODDAMN ADULT.  I bought this awesome house that was previously owned by a tiny 85 year old Japanese lady with absolutely wild taste in wallpaper.  She died a year before I bought the house, but obviously because I’m me, I looked her up and read her obituary and I love her.  I named the house after her because honestly what else was I going to call it.

The last post had me trying to get a diagnosis and getting referred to ADHD skills class.  Well.  The teacher of that class is an incredibly amazing doctor, the best I’ve ever had.  She made me her patient, gave me an official diagnosis (”I don’t know how nobody saw this because it’s very obvious!), and has been working on helping me with treatments and coping skills.  Bad news, stimulants are not a great treatment for me.  Well, actually Adderall was great in terms of helping my focus, but I also didn’t like or care about food at all while I was on it, so I lost 10lbs in 8 weeks and we were all concerned and stopped that.  I also have been absolutely crashing in my depression over the course of this year, so she has helped me with a combination of meds that help me with my depression, sleep problems, appetite issues, and focus problems all in one nice cocktail.  I also have been doing treatment classes like ADHD skills and stress management skills.  I’m trying.  My doctor actually listens to me and treats me like an intelligent and rational person, and provides me complete information about every option she offers and involves me in decisions regarding my own treatment.  It sounds basic, but it’s fucking revolutionary and I love her so much.

Munchkin graduated high school and is now attending community college with plans to transfer to university.  She might come live with me starting in January, which should be fun.  Bugga is a senior in high school now too... All the smol people all grown up.  (Well like sorta grown.... they’re both barely 5ft pretty much so a very tiny sort of grown up.)

I feel like those are all the main things... I’m putting some finishing touches on organization and decorating at the new house, but then I plan to take pictures of stuff and share those (along with the before pictures) because I love my house and I’m very happy with all the work I’ve put in to making it mine (and Beau’s) perfect place.

I’ll probably update again in a ridiculously long time.  As always, if you followed me a long time and want to still know stuff, shoot me a private message and I’ll give you my other social media info for better staying in touch skills!

[sweetoothgirl]

Marshmallow Creme Stuffed Chocolate Chip Cookies

[shiraglassman]

This is even funnier than gal pal

We just bought a cute sofa from an antique shop, while being very obviously a couple and looking like a butch/femme salt and pepper shaker set, and the shop owner wanted to know how long we’d been, and I quote, “hanging out.”

[shiraglassman]

I’ll still laughing at this the next morning.

[fireandwonder]

*gets down on one knee in front of gal pal* *takes out ring* Will you hang out with me?

[skunkydpoopy]

There was one time I was out shoe shopping with my partner and I was debating buying these cute pastel green shoes. The saleswoman was like “well why don’t we ask your friend here?” I said “oh actually this is my partner.” The woman stared at us blank faced for a few awkward seconds before forcibly smiling and saying, “partner in crime?”

[shiraglassman]

JAW….DROP…. 

[lady-patra]

In a store once with a girl I used to date, browsing through all these different mattresses. One of the sales ladies came over and talked about all the beds with us for quite some time while we told her what we were looking for. It was painfully obvious we were a couple, like literally holding hands and calling each cute pet names out loud. Finally the sales lady laughs nervously and says “sooo.. wow, what kind of roommate setup is that that forces you two to have to share a bed!?” I just sort of stared at her for second at a complete loss and said “… the dating kind…”

[vibinwitch]

Cute nicknames to call your same gender partner:

-hang out buddy -partner in crime -roommate I’m forced to share a bed with

[doctorbee]

Okay I very rarely add on to long posts like this, but Supergirl and I went to the bank last year to take out a loan together. After quite a while of holding hands, discussing interest rates, talking about our various options, a personal loan was approved in my name. The banker then had to write the purpose of the loan and she had gotten the part where it was to help Supergirl with some medical stuff, but she started typing and goes "Okay, so for purpose of loan, I'll list it as helping your.... sister?"

[miggylol]

I’ve found it. I’ve found the worst thing.

[friendlyneighborhoodpixie]

“The worst thing?”

You FOOL.

It can ALWAYS be worse.

[beaft]

you are like a little baby. watch this.

[trinklied]

#please keep adding terrible jeans to this post  

ok

[rigberts]

@deanbeltingbohemianrhapsody

[trashcanbees-deactivated2019120]

This is fucking jarmageddon

[greatmardini]

[doctorbee]

@ex-cunnus-mea

[sweetoothgirl]

Dark Chocolate Bread Pudding

[nichorello]

Jane Fonda in Barefoot In the Park (1967) [Part 1/3]

[doctorbee]

I just want to buy a house and pay a mortgage instead of rent and have a little yard and nice kitchen and be all adult and not sit here and look at how I’ve done incredibly well cultivating a large savings before the age of 30 and I have NOWHERE near enough to make a downpayment for a house and it would take me at least 6 more years to have the downpayment I need and that’s pretending my rent never goes up and I can continue to save money in the meantime.

[sweetoothgirl]

Apple Pecan Pie with Salted Pumpkin Caramel

[0deerling0-inactive]

If you’re one of those people who thinks executive dysfunction only happens for things we don’t like (school, cleaning,) then please consider the fact that I’ve been meaning to plug my phone in for 20 minutes and I’m now at 2% and still putting it off to write this post ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[doctorbee]

My dad just discovered Black Mirror about a week ago and he messaged me today to say there’s an episode call San Junipero and even if I don’t watch any other episodes, he thinks I should watch that one and it’s really really good and he thinks I’ll really like it.

I’ve raised him well.  Also this is incredibly endearing.  Also yes dad, I’ve seen San Junipero, as all lesbians have.

[sweetoothgirl]

Almond Joy Thumbprint Cookies

[sweetoothgirl]

cranberry brie pull apart bread

[goblinkind]

This Test Will Reveal Your Dominant Personality Trait

Let's find out about the real you.

Reblog this and write your results in the tags!

[slowdissolveto]

#curiosity

[thisisgonnabemymonkey]

COMPASSION

[doctorbee]

Bee makes an appearance and gives a life update (and then disappears again)

Hello.  It’s me.  I’m still alive.  I still barely ever get on tumblr.  My life is hectic.  But in case you were wondering, here’s a brief update on my life:

Continuing to work in autism research.  In September we were awarded one of 5 prestigious and huge NIH grants given nationally for autism research, in sum setting us up to launch 3 new research studies with about $12 million.  I am now the manager of 5 research studies.  Our new ones aim to understand and treat comorbid anxiety (using treatment plans specifically designed for autistic kids) and another to understand early brain growth and enlargement from a cell and molecular level to brain structure to behavior.  I continue to not talk about my work on social media much in part because the majority of cool stuff and cool people and kids I see is HIPAA protected.  I’m also crazy crazy crazy busy.  Oh also I told my primary boss a few months ago that I deserved a promotion and he and my two other bosses all wholeheartedly agreed and gave me both a title promotion and a 9.5% salary raise.  (This is so much different than grad school when my boss told me I was incapable and not smart.... Everyone here loves and supports me???  It’s cool.)

My dog is the love and joy of my life.  We’ve just completed 5 months of beginner obedience training (it’s a 1 month long class.... we just repeated it 5 times).  He’s improved so much over the past year that I’ve had him.  He still has some anxieties, but he’s really learning to be good and overcome his fears.  This month we will be starting intermediate obedience and next month we will start formal agility training.  This dog can fucking FLY so agility is going to be awesome.  He’s also the cutest dog in the world and is goofy and his tongue STILL doesn’t fit in his mouth.

Supergirl and I continue to be your favorite ginger femme lesbians.  She had a whole bunch of both mental and physical health problems over the past year but she’d been working really hard of recovery and I’m so goddamn proud of her, you would not believe.  She’s still far away but our ability to cope with long distance is decent and we continue to work on a plan to move her to California, hopefully sometime in 2018.  I visited her for New Years and Pennsylvania was fucking COLD AS HELL so next winter we really gotta get her out here.

If you followed along with Bee’s Family Hive at any point, just FYI, Munchkin is graduating high school this year... So that’s weird.  But she’s still awesome, just like weirdly grown up awesome.  Still like the size of a pinto bean though.  The rest of my family is mostly good, my brother is a disaster, etc, etc, etc.

My rent is increasing and it’s sparked a potential moving up of my life plans and while I originally planned to buy a house in 2020, I’m seriously looking into buying a house this year.  IT’S WEIRD AND ADULT.  I’m also planning to hopefully buy something that’s large enough for me to expand in so I can eventually round myself up some children.  (You guys, there are an estimated 600 queer kids in the foster system in my county so like... it’s totally reasonable for me to get a 600 bedroom house, right???  HI KIDS IT’S YOUR MOM BEE SHE’S INSANE BUT ALSO LOVES YOU A LOT.)

I’ve also been trying for the past 8 months to get an ADHD diagnosis.  As all of these demands at work continue to grow, a pattern of symptoms that I’ve been experiencing throughout my life has escalated.  (They’ve been escalating since high school, and particularly had an effect on my ability to function in grad school, but have always been overshadowed by either comorbid mental health issues like anxiety and depression or just masked by what my new therapist called “an abundance of compensatory mechanisms”.)  However, a mystery “they” of my health system keeps rejecting all my attempts to get properly assessed.  My therapist is on my side though and I’m going to keep working with her to see what we can do to get me help.  She did get me into an ADHD skills class that doesn’t require a diagnosis (loophole!) that starts next week so we’ll see how that goes.

As always, if you’re someone I’ve known for a while on tumblr and you want to stay in touch with me now that I’m not really around here, please please shoot me a message and I’ll give you my alternate contact.  (Also I do OPEN tumblr at least once a week, so like you can always still just message me here?)

[beausregards-blog]

Happy New Year! We made a Beauregard 2018 calendar to celebrate this kid’s face and also how much fun we’ve had in our first full year together. 🐄🐶❤️🐾

[doctorbee]

My dog is the love of my life, you guys...

[hilarious-nefarious]

Source

[cunningcelt]

This is bloody genius