Hello person having transgender thoughts but convinced they aren't trans because they don't have the requisite amount of dysphoria they think they need
Hi I transitioned without even thinking I had dysphoria. Like later in hindsight I can go "oh that's probably what it was" but for the first year of my transition I was straight up like "I like being a guy but I like being a girl WAY more" and you can do that!! There is no prerequisite amount of suffering needed to make yourself happier.
At the risk of sounding anti-intellectual, I think that college should be free and also not a requirement for employment outside of highly specialized career fields
technically you can, if you don't care about degrees.
Free Harvard courses.
Free Courses from Stanford.
Free Courses from MIT.
Free courses from Yale.
Free courses from Princeton.
Free courses on Coursera.
Free Courses on EDx
Free Courses on Alison
For paid, there's The Great Courses+/Wonderium. 20$ a month for unlimited courses.
When searching, the phrases you're looking for are Massive Open Online Courses (MOOCs), or you can do a general search of say, "free online college courses."
Oh, and so you don't get surprised like I did, have an avoid: Hillsdale College is a conservative Christian site and not a valid MOOC place. Sign up with them and you will get things like THIS IS WHY THE LEFT IS TURNING YOUR KIDS TRANS AND GAY in your inbox.
"im lazy" i truly sympathize with executive dysfunction, but this is one of those quality-of-life things you need to prioritize. 3 minutes of research/installation will save you a thousandfold in time and energy. it can even help with brain fog (most people don't realize how much mental energy ads actually steal)
"i like ads" my jaw is on the fucking floor. you chose to live in a sewer, yet you will never be a ninja nor a turtle. you do not have a warrior's heart.
*inhaling deeply and reminding myself that Shaking The Baby only endangers the baby, and does not assist it to learn or grow* in spite of everything there are beautiful and important truths within this world that you must learn, and i must help you to learn
⬆️⬆️⬆️ Can confirm, I use this method (alongside others) on android. for iOS the steps are different (and it may be easier to install the AdGuard DNS app instead)
the above will decrease the amount of ads you see system-wide. however: hands down the BEST ANDROID ADBLOCKING feature is the ability to install Firefox with uBlock Origin enabled.
this only blocks browser ads, but HOLY SHIT does that matter if you try browsing websites over apps when possible. which you should bc it's awesome and gives you SO much more control. E.g. blocks youtube.com ads and you can play videos in the background. works with spotify.com too
Pro tip: toggle on 'Desktop site' to avoid mobile sites that are purposely designed to bully you into using the app. Desktop mode fixes a surprising number of problems
Note: for iOS users this isn't possible bc Apple hates your guts, but there are other browser options with built-in adblocking.
Au where Simon is experiencing Trauma based psychosis and was admitted in the ward, found in someones yard, clutching a tree and screaming that he "Dosn't want to go".
His behavioral phycologist is Dr. Ava, but his truama therapist is (cane user genderfluid) Dr. Grace. Ft. Dr. Grace's therapy pup Laika and patiant human!Rocky (Ricky Ortiz) was admitted for rambles of not being human and everyone around him dying. He also keeps mentioning a person named Adrian, but when asked where Adrian is, he just points upwards. "They're not from here, I left, and now everyone is dead!" While curled into a ball. Head administrator Eva Stratt and nurse Carl included. Carl and Grace are lowkey enablers, but they want their patiants to feel cared for, not scared. Carl and Dr. Grace are also room mates with black cat named Suneater. (Sunny)
Simon having a panic attack, trying to merge himself with the wall in the common room, hyperventilating, gasping for air but visiblily not being able to keep it in his lungs.
"Ooh, Simon. This again?? I thought Dr. Ava prescribed you something for this.." Carl mutters, squatting down.
"Dont-! Don't fucking touch me! Are you real? This is a trick! Fuck you!- Im sorry! Dont.. dont put me back in! I-" Simon is actively clawing at the old outdated yellow wall paper. "I'll be good! Please-" he says, as if trying to crawl away from the nurse but was going nowhere.
Carl sighs, getting his walkie talkie. "Paging Dr. Ava. Event in the commons." He says, waiting for the womans response, but instead he got someone different.
"Hey Carl! Ava's out today. Simon or Rocky?"
Carl now stands, streatching as he steps back from Simon, giving him space. "Guess."
"Mmmh.. Simon?"
"Bingo."
"Orange or red?"
"No physical attempts of ourburst yet but I'm watching him." Carl states, watching as Simon now was crawling away, trying to hide himself under the coffee table. "Yo, Simon, you're okay. Deep breaths."
"Fuck you!- sorry.." He repeats, only fitting half way in the table.
Just as he's doing this, Ricky comes out of his room, inching like an anxious child. "Simon need help? Rocky help?" His hand comes to the door frame, tapping twice.
Carl smiles at him. "Oh hey, Ricky. Nah, Grace is coming. Thanks though."
The man rubs his arms, playing with his fingers as he thought. "..Not Rocky name.."
"Of course. I'm sorry, Rocky."
Just as he says this, the pitter patter of little feet comes down the hall, steps with the tap of a cane following. "Hello, Rocky. How are you, today?" He taps the cane twice on the tile.
Rocky gives a stary eyed grin, stepping forward to hug her. "Grace! Grace, grace, grace! Hi."
"Hi buddy!" Dr. Grace technically wasn't supposed to hug his patiants (Dr. Stratt has scolded him several times before), but he knew she was in a meeting right now, and sometimes trust was best for patiants whose main problem wasn't violence.
Simon.. on the other hand.. was a different story.
He fluctuated far too much. One day he was fine, the next he was swinging on anything that moved near him. One of the main things he and Grace spoke about was an entity of the name Ellie. Who allegedly stole his arm. Grace suspected his PTSD had made up some sort of story to cover what he saw during his time in the Navy.
According to records, Simon's sub oxygen had punctured, causing air loss to his brain. It was so bad that by the time they pulled him up, he had been unconscious for a good half a minute. So many of his memories were all gumbled that it was difficult to know what he was talking about most days. It annoyed Dr. Ava to death.
Laika, whos tail wagged seeing anyone, sniffed her nose at Simon under the table, play bowing at him with her tounge out.
At this point, The dog could handle it herself. And to think, she would be euthanized by now. Grace had picked her up off an ad from the local shelter. A "Last chance" kind of ad about dogs who would be put down due to not enough resources. Grace hadn't meant to get a dog during college, but he was now greatful for her.
Within minutes, she had Simon out from the table, petting her and taking deep breaths. She was licking his face, tail going in circles as she laid on Simon's chest. Rising and falling as he calmed.
After a quick chat with Rocky about his day, Grace excuses themself, getting closer. "Hey, Si. You doin' alright?" He asks, knowing the awnser.
Staring up at her, Simon, laying on his back, sees the ringed light above his head, shining into his eyes as he squints. Was he dead? Was that a fucking angel!?
Simon says nothing, jaw hanging open as he stares.
"Sorry that Ava wasn't able to come see you, but i'm here. In the meantime do you want to come to my office?" They ask, "I got a new star system for you."
Simon blinks, sitting up, letting the dog fall in his arms as he looks at Grace. "Are.. are you real?" He asks, the dog still slobbering on him, making him smile and hide his neck from her slimey tongue. He didn't like his neck touched..
"Yes, Simon. I am real. She is real. Carl is real. Rocky is real. What else can you see that is real? Hm? Anything purple?" She asks him.
Grace puts a hand out. Simon flinches.
"She can't hurt you anymore. You're safe. I promise." Dr. Grace whispers.
Simon, hesitantly took his hand, allowing help to be pulled up. Laika had gotten off his lap the second their hands touched, knowing she'd just fall off if she didn't.
"Come on. Lets go look at stars and talk about whats real. Were going to play around the world, okay?"
"O-okay.." Simon agrees, holding his hand as they walk back towards the office.
Around the world was pretty easy. Low maintenance that can open doors. First, Simon would talk, and then toss the earth hackie sack to Dr. Grace. After that, Grace would toss it back, asking a question again while looking at the projected stars on the ceiling.
Simon liked the stars. Sometimes Dr. Grace would ask which he could name inbetween questions to keep from overwhelming him.
"Oh, oh! Can Rocky come? Grace Rocky see stars?"
Just before Grace can open their mouth, Carl speaks up. "Come and talk with me for a bit, Rock. Im sure Dr. Grace will play with you once Simon gets calmed down."
"Carl Rocky play cards?"
"I was thinking I whoop you at connect 4 again?"
Grace, walking down the hall gives him a fond smile. "Thanks." He mouthed. Carl nods. God, Carl really was the best. He never forgot to take the trash out, and he was always great help at work. Always so kind to the patiants, even if one of them was convinced he wasn't a human.
The emotional whump potential of GraceRocky post-canon is underestimated. Rocky returns to Erid as a changed person, both good and bad. He has been MIA for over 400 [Eridian] years. There is a good possibility that Adrian pulled a Dear John on him. And if they didnt? There is an equally good possibility that their relationship falls apart. Not due to whatever it is that he and Grace have going on, although it contributes (I don't believe monogamy would be as strictly enforced culturally as on Earth), but simply because Rocky kinda Came Back Wrong from the perspective of Adrian. Their break-up would be on par of that with a couple who divorced due to child death or tragedy. An amicable and complicated end that just, sucks. One that you can remain friends with and have a deeper connection, enough for Adrian to even remain present in helping Rocky with the biosphere development, but that romantic tie is damaged irreperably.
Meanwhile, Grace is watching this unfold with his Earth biases and assumes he homewrecked. Grace feels guilty and, somewhere deep inside, terrfiied of his precarious position on Erid. If he and Rocky have a falling out, will the plug get pulled on him? Little does he know that he is the only thing keeping Rocky from having a catastophic breakdown. He is the only thing keeping Rocky afloat admist the post-mission debriefings, the bureacracy, the inevitable divorce, the crew eulogies, the PTSD. Co-dependency at its finest and manifested in every way.
Dream startles, looking up from the heavy grimore he was pouring over
"Quackity! Hi, how can I help?"
He hadn't noticed Quackity entering the room, not even with the heavy creaky door and their soul bond tugging on his chest. Really, Dream had been so distracted lately, falling into one of those research rabbit holes that seem to demand all his focus. If Sapnap had seen it he would chide Dream for not focusing enough on his environment and leaving himself vulnerable to attack, being the worrier he is.
"Hi," Quackity smiles back, but there's a weary weight under his eyes as he does, "you promised me you would take a break in a little bit, remember?"
"Oh! Yeah sorry," Dream chirps, but he sends a wishfull look at the grimore still open on his desk, "...but it's been so little time since then hasn't it? I'm about to end this chapter. When did you check on me, like half an hour ago?"
Just by the look in Quackity's face Dream knows he got the time wrong, but it really doesn't feel like much time has passed. Maybe he was just focused and didn't notice? But it couldn't have been more then a hour or so ago, at max two hours.
"Last time I checked on you was a week ago Dream"
Oh
"Oh."
"Yeah"
The two of them stare at each other from across the room for a moment before Quackity breaks the silence.
"Please take a break with me"
"Yeah I-" Dream closes the grimore, pushing it aside and going over to Quackity, "I'll take a break. Sorry"
Quackity sighs, sending Dream another weary smile and taking his hand in his
"It's okay. I got us lunch, are you hungry?" He asks as they leave Dream's office and walk to one of the royal gardens
Dream isn't, but he nods anyway, not wanting to make Quackity even more worried
The garden is more overgrown then Dream remembers, but its still as beautiful as ever and Quackity finds a comfortable spot for them to sit and enjoy it's view
They talk, eating the simple sandwiches and soup Quackity brought for them both. Dream asks about how Quackity's business has been going and he cheerfully tells him about how he expanded his (deeply illegal) merchant empire to another kingdom, and all of the people he met recently
It's good. Dream forgets sometimes, that this is what he loves the most, this is what he fights and studies and bleeds for. Simple moments with the people he cares about, talking about nothing that matters and enjoying each other companies.
Dream's eyes drift over the scenery, enjoying the pleasantly warm weather as Quackity rambles on about one tale or another
Dream forgets...
...
There's apples in a tree nearby. His last memory of the outside has glancing out a window and seeing a snow storm while he waited for Sapnap to finish getting ready to bed.
...
"We're not quite here anymore, are we?"
Dream says, interrupting Quackity's tale about the weirdest human he had ever met.
When Dream tears his eyes from the apple tree after too many moments of silence, Quackity is looking at him with nothing but grief in his eyes
"... no. You're not"
"How are George and Sapnap doing? Are they also?"
Maybe there's time for them to heal this. Dream might be losing himself but maybe the others can still-
Quackity shakes his head, knowing exactly what Dream was thinking
"I managed to make George drink some tea last week, just before I went to check on you, but he's pretty lost in it. Sapnap goes outside more, but I need to remind him to wash off the blood and rest, or else he will just fight non stop."
"What about you and Karl?" Dream asks, desperation bleeding into his tone. The two of them never messed with magic as much as Dream George and Sapnap, so they should be fine, right?
... no. Not by the look in Quackity's face, not by the dread pulsing from his heart
"I can feel myself slipping. I'm only better off because I work with mortals so much, and they will not let me forget the time," Quackity sighs, "but Karl..."
"It's bad Dream, really bad. I think he went looking for a solution for you three, but whatever he found and whatever he's done he's just not the same anymore. He comes back with weird clothes, sometimes talking in languages I've never heard. He keeps having odd reactions, flinching at silences and reaching for things that aren't there."
Quackity's lips twitch and Dram watches in as tears bead on his human eye.
"I can barely feel his heart anymore and his memory is failing. I've been trying to help him, but I can't do it Dream. He's slipping though my fingers and I can't- I can't help him I can't help you- I'm so sorry- I can't do it alone please-"
Dream pulls Quackity into his arms as he starts sobbing, whispering a thousand apologies for leaving his canary to carry all their burdens for so long without noticing
Dream is not sure how long hey stay there, (clearly, now he's even worse then before at telling the time) but by the time Dream dares move Quackity has cried himself to sleep, and the sun is much lower in the sky.
He tugs at their bond, feeling Quackity's soul tug back at him quick and alert even as his owner sleeps (what's wrong what's happening are you okay-) George's and Sapnap's react lethargicaly, and Dream tugs harder, hoping it will be enough to snap them into lucidity, if only for a moment.
Karl's... Karl feels so far away, like there's s ravine of space between then, where they used to be side by side. Dream can barely feel his phantom breathing along his, and for the first time in (moths? years? decades? ... centuries?) Dream feels his heart freeze with fear
Oh gods. What happen to them
Reminder that the #Rat's shame corner tag is a tag so that you can easily block any discussion of ships like this and silent duo :]
(It is also a lh joke at myself don't worry about he shame thing)
And!!! Any questions you have are very welcome and make me very happy :D
thinking about a very specific scenario of a grace with no video logs, with no xenonite failure, who comes back to earth as rocky comes back to erid, heart full but missing a very distinct piece. ten, twenty years go by, and grace is not malnourished nor does he look even half his age, but there's a deepset something in his eyes that has nothing to do with stratt's actions being revealed or the press or adjusting to earth again. about earth getting news of a ship coming down, whose atmosphere is fundamentally different now and causes trouble for that ship. damages sustained on that ship. a red light in the sky. suspected eridian contact as confirmed by dr ryland grace. thank you tom, anna temple here and we're live at nasa's makeshift landing pad, ready to receive, watching- oh, my- a row of officials that cannot pin down ryland grace this time as he, live on air, tears apart every country's anxiety of eridians by ripping from the crowd and jumping the fence into the launching area. a camera pan that judders from dr grace sprinting, the most energetic he's been in years, to a brown eridian kareening towards him in a xenonite suit. prepared to catch ryland's tackle and embrace him properly, there on the green grass, for the very first time. first contact.
'rocky learns to swear in english' is great and all but have we considered the equally hilarious alternative: rocky makes grace a little harmonica so he can use tone indicators in eridian, does not realize how terrible of a mistake this is until it's too late. grace catches onto tone indicators FAST and he is DEVASTATING with their application. grace does not use eridian swears but rocky gets to hear "are we choosing kind words" and "I'm not mad I'm just disappointed" in eridian roughly thirty times per day
dededos
andulkaphoto
turnnoffyourmind
2087
snowghoul
stormborns
