Cotton candy and sweet peach tea ೃ⁀➷🍑🍭
Summary: You're having a mental crisis over what to wear and how bad you think your body looks and Leon, being your favourite neighbour, comes over and comforts you!
Tags: Chubby!reader x re4 Leon s kennedy, hurt/comfort, self-harm thoughts and eating disorder mentioning. Its overall filled with sensitive topics.
A/n: please go easy on me this is my first time writing a fic in like idk 3 years now?😭 i just hope you guys will enjoy this🩷🩷🩷
It was one hell of a week you had.
It was like your fate played tricks and games with you the whole five weekdays and as if it couldn't get any worse, the two days that you thought would be some peace and quiet for you were taken away from you. By your parents. Your mom called you on friday night and talked your ear off about how she wants you to attend to a long loved family friends daughters wedding, which made your mind go nuts cause you had a ton of things to do that you left for the weekend other than your usual chores and she talked about for a hot minute about how you should go in a suitable dress and how you should wear a corset under the said suitable dress and oh dont forget about how a short one will show off your thick thighs that you, and her since she talks so bad about your own body that it makes you also think you look like a sack of potatoes, hate to your guts and oh also dont wear your hair up on a ponytail cause that also makes your fat cheeks more visible and dont even think about a-
You hung up on her face. Already feeling your eyes sting and mind go messy as you tried to think about what to do. You had no energy to socialise let alone getting dolled up and trying to fit yourself in a tight corset in an attempt to make you feel and look more "presentable". You had piled up laundry, dishwasher was waiting for you to put the now clean plates and pretty glasses that you had. Oh, and your room? Yeah lets not get into that. It was all messy, both your house and your mind. You were late to work for almost all the days of the week, sleep schedule? Yeah, you don't have one now. You binge ate for five days straight cause it genuinely felt like you were gonna pass out whenever you didn't eat for more than thirty minutes or so.
This had a reason though.
The work was filled to the brim with how the business had struck up even though you were just a 9-5 desk worker who had to write a couple of reports and send e-mails and stuff but since business skyrocketed somehow, you had to do four times more of what you already did. Also, a couple of new starters were dumped on you to teach them about how things worked and what they had to do. Which just meant one thing, you were exhausted and your body did the only reasonable thing to do: Cope with binge eating and crying yourself to sleep every night.
It wasn't all gloomy and scary throughout the week though. At least, with your neighbour Leon around.
He usually isn't home much since his job requires him to go on missions that last long and stuff. You don't know much partially because he looks really tense and stressed every time you bring up his work so you don't wanna bother the poor guy and just let him be, and partially because you really can't pry out anything from his tight mouth about work other than the things you already know.
He came from a long-lasting mission about ten days ago. You knew each other since you moved into the building, about a year ago and you guys clicked almost instantly. He was a funny guy who could crack jokes whenever and wherever and you were...well, quite the same actually, since your body doesn't give you any pretty privilage so you need something to look approachable which means bad but good humour and funny jokes, so you guys got along pretty well. You two knew when the other one needed space or comfort or anything really. He sometimes shows up on your door holding a plate that's filled with chocolate chip cookies that he bought when he spotted a good bakery while driving home and comes over to your place to munch on them with you.
You can't lie, he looks like he would make a great boyfriend. Calm, handsome, really comforting, collected and responsible, and many more things you couldn't just count cause your breath would fall short and probably the world would be done spinning until you were done. If only you had a bit of confidence and a thin body, you always thought.
A thinner body with plump but still dainty hips and chest. Smaller waist and a little less appetite. Little to no stomach and a body that could fit into small clothes. A body that what you're wearing now would be oversized for.
Everything that you're not...
That's what you were wishing for.
You guys exchanged brief hello's and a bit of a chit chat throughout the week and honestly, that was your only escape and lifeline for almost the whole week.
But then came your breaking point;
The day before the wedding.
You did all your chores, everything you had to do but didnt through out the week and a couple paperworks that you bring home every Friday. You were done with everything you had to do but the thought of scrunching yourself into a tiny corset and wearing a flattering dress for the next day made your stomach sick. You felt the anxiety the whole day which made you dizzy at some point but you managed to deal with it. Until you actually had to try on the four or five dresses that you had sitting at the back of your closet that you probably won't fit in simply because you couldn't stop yourself. "Lack of determination" what your mother would say...
You tried. Oh god knows you tried...
All three corsets you had, all five of the dresses, all your courage and all your half-positive body image...
It all crumbled like the cookies and pizza crusts that you ate under your unrealistic wants and looks you waited for your body despite struggling with weight almost your whole life. As if you weren't a chubby kid then and you weren't a chubby woman a couple of days ago. You wanted all of the fat and extra skin to vanish every time you looked at yourself in the mirror.
You wanted to throw up everything that you ate for the last twenty one years of your life but they were too far away from your stomach because they were burried under your skin; your squishy arms and stomach rolls, thick legs and chubby cheeks...they are everywhere now and you can't do anything to make them vanish even just for a couple of hours.
You were having an anxiety attack which eventually turned into a panic attack slowly. You were hugging your legs while lying on top of the clothes that you tried a couple of hours ago now and you were too into it now that you couldn't get out of the dress and the corset you put on to try and you just gave up. Crying your heart and guts out, unable to stop yourself from spiralling just from the mere thought about your own body, your home...
He heard your cries but the thoughtful person he is, he stopped himself from breaking your door and barging in cause no that was not what you needed obviously. Living right next to your small apartment, he thought about a lot of things when he heard you cry your precious heart out, probably into a pillow but it couldn't drown out the sobs you were letting out.
He just had to check on you or else he would explode while trying to calm himself, even the thought of someone hurting you was enough for him to spiral.
He admits, in his head, that he might have a thing for you but it should just stay in friend terms. It needs to stay like that. He cares and adores you so much that he really couldn't handle someone hurting you or even touching you in the slightest bit because of him which would actually make him have a heart attack on the spot. So he decided in his head a long time ago that he would protect you by not being in a relationship with you.
He knocked on your door four times. That was a hint for you that its leon and no one else. It was your little "door code". When you didn't open the door but he could still hear your sobs coming from inside, probably from your room, he rang the doorbell to get your attention. Getting anxious every single second that he can't see you but hears your sobs and whimpers.
Right when he decided that it was no good and debated if he should break the door or not, your voice came from the other side of the door; crooked, broken, shakey and fragile.
"Your favourite neighbour."
The moment you heard his voice you flung the door open almost immediately. You wiped away the tears that wouldn't stop and tried to swallow the hiccups that were calm but still there. In an attempt to look a bit less crazy, you put some hair behind your ears and tried to calm your breathing but you couldn't make yourself look up at him. No not like this..
He hesitated simply because he knows youre not but he doesn't know how to actually start a conversation with a crying person who looks a mess... A cute mess with red nose and cheeks with doe eyes that were know looked a bit more plump since you were crying too hard, a cute mess that was standing half behind the door with a pretty dress that covered her figure but looked a bit too crinkled with how you probably layed down on the floor with it, a cute mess that he yearns and aches at this point to touch and comfort her through whatever shes going through...
"Okay is an understatement..."
You managed to say between your laboured breaths and sniffs and the joke took out a small laugh from him
"Okay well, that was good. Can i come in?"
He asked, hoping you would say yes but he saw you hesitate for a minute
"Its... It's messy right now are you sure?"
You didn't know if you were talking about your room or your headspace but you know it's just... Messy.
"Oh, you already know I'm not here to hang around... Also, you know that i dont realy care."
He managed to say while trying not to jump inside and hug you till your bones break.
"Uhm yeah, sure then come in."
You mumbled as you opened the door a bit more so that he could get in.
He stepped inside and closed the door as you stood behind it like you were trying to hide from a lion or something and the moment you saw his eyes take in your chubby, soft curved figured you started crying again as your hands came up to hide your face.
"Oh- hey hey no lets not do that..."
He said in a soft, understanding tone as he reached for you and brought you close to his chest. Your tears left a stain on his black shirt while your sobs made his heart break.
"Let's get you to the couch yeah? Sshh i know just breathe for me."
He guided you to your small couch with flower prints on it and sat down right next to you while patting your back and shoulder in an attempt to calm you down just a little...
"Hey sweet cheeks... I know you wanna cry but at least talk to me a little bit yeah? Tell me what's going on pretty girl."
He spoke like he was handling a porcelain vase that could crack at any moment and you almost melted on the spot despite crying like a baby in front of him right now. He reached for your hands that were hiding your face and gently pulled them away as he took in your red cheeks and nose and your teary eyes and how...tired you looked.
He cupped one of your cheeks and wiped away the tears as his other hand came to rest on your shoulder from your back.
You loved the pet names since they were the only sign of vulnerability you got from him as in "relationship" terms and they calmed you down whenever you felt a bit too anxious or mad or anything bad realy. He knew his way around your heart and mind and he reads you like an open book anytime you don't wanna talk about something. Such a good friend, right..?
You tried to talk with a ragged breath and a fragile voice as you looked up at his eyes now,
"I h-have to go to a wedding t-tommorrow.."
You mumbled while trying to stop your words from coming out shaky.
"Okay sweet cheeks go on,"
"And its a family f-friends daughter s-so i have to look p-pretty and..."
You took a breath and kept going
"And im going w-with my mom so she told m-me that i h-have to look presentable so I tried on my dresses."
"Mhm, what happened next, why are you crying so much sweetheart?"
He tried to guess but a man can think so much with all the possibilities and even thinking about what if you were physically hurt in some way. His mind was already working hard on how he could comfort you and calm you down.
You felt your tears gather in your eyes again as your lips quivered
"And i tried all of them and t-they all look like shit! I look like shit!!"
"I tried t-them on with every single shapewear that i have, all of them are just useless! I just w-wanna throw up and never eat again and disappear a-and i wanna cut away all of my fat parts and just be thin! W-why is it so hard to just s-stop eating for once and go d-do something to make me slim and f-fine instead.."
He mumbled under his breath as he pressed you against his chest. Letting you cry your heart out while he stroked your back
"You know you're just breaking your own and my heart speaking like this... Don't beat yourself up, it's not like you can do something and you're not doing it..."
He said as he stroked your head and played with your hair.
"I know you try to lose weight from time to time and I can see how determined you get while doing so but just because you couldn't change things about yourself easily doesn't mean that you're less precious and less of a human."
He backed away from the tearful hug that you were giving him and realised that you're crying your heart out, in a corset and a dress so he decided to change that..
"Angel, don't you wanna go change into something comfier? I will make you some tea while you change and I can get you to fully relax hm? Then we will sort out whatever bad thoughts your silly head is thinking about yourself."
He asked with his honey-dripping voice that he used almost every friday night that he was home to convince you into ordering pizza.
You managed to mumble between your sobs and tears while trying to calm yourself down. He guided you to your bedroom and sat you down on the bed as he helped you unzip the dress and loosen the back of the corset, and stepped out of your room to give you privacy and make you your favourite peach and lavender flavoured tea in your small kitchen. He couldn't help but think though, how could someone with such a pretty face and a body think so harshly about herself... To him, you were absolutely what he craved for. In a world that was surrounded by bullets, knives and everything hard and sharp, you were the only thing in his life that reminded him how softness can exist too. With your feather-light touch whenever you patched him up or with the plushness of your cheeks and body. It all made him feel so relaxed his mind sometimes ached with the thought of coming home from a mission and knocking at your door to remember how softness comes with a woman that was made out of literal cotton candy.
He put some water in the kettle and waited for it to boil as he reached for a cabinet where you kept various flavoured tea bags. He reached for the peach and laveneder flavoured one, put it in one of your favourite mugs then started searching the kitchen for where your honey stash was and he found a jar in the back of a cabinet since you don't like putting your honey in the fridge. He put two teaspoons of honey in the mug and poured the now hot water, put the tea bag in and started mixing it to make sure the honey melts well.
While he was busy making you tea you managed to change into one of your baggy pjs and an oversized band tee. Before you got out of your room you put your hair up in a bun in an attempt to make the redness in your cheeks and nose go away and stepped out.
"Hi there. Feeling better? Your tea is ready ma'am"
You managed to huff out a small laugh despite your tiredness and dried tear stains on your cheeks.
"Thank you...for everything, realy."
He was leaning on the counter as he picked up the mug of warm tea and walked towards you with a smile that's as warm as the tea he's holding.
"Don't mention it sweet cheeks"
You two sat down on your couch again but this time a bit more calm than a couple of minutes earlier.
"Im...im realy sorry you had to see me like that leon."
"What? No stop saying sorry angel you know that im more than happy to help you out i already told you that."
"But still, you don't have to and i dont wanna be a burden for your already tiring life im just a neighbour..."
He sighed and looked you dead in the eyes as if daring you to say it again
"You know, i had a reason to call you sweet cheeks but now with you pressing on my buttons like that i think i wanna call you sour cheeks."
He joked and you let out half a laugh to that
"Oh well im just telling you the truth... I just want you to know me as this cheerful neighbour who bakes really well and loves watching old action movies with. None of this breakdown shit."
"Sweetheart youre a human do you know that?? Just please take a moment and be proud that you're expressing your emotions rather than bottling them up like me"
He blurted out, his tone now a bit annoyed at how stubborn you were about all of this. You took the hint so you chose to stay silent and that took out a sigh from him. He slowly scooted closer to you and started playing with little pieces of your hair that were sticking out from your messy bun absent-mindedly. He almost always did this and it drove you crazy.
"Also, losing weight won't make you more of a better woman in any way if you think thats the reason why you think you cant be loved... I personally think..."
He stopped and hesitated for a hot minute and he just decided to go for it. With the way your big doe eyes were staring at him expectantly, he had no way of backing up from what he was about to say now.
"You're everything that someone could ask for just the way you are and you really need to stop trying to change who or what you are just because you can't wear extra small clothes and don't like dieting or whatever you blame yourself for..."
"youre just perfect the way you are angel..."
His look burned itself into your pretty eyes. Now both of you are blushing a little bit with how intimate his words and tone are...
"Do you realy think that?"
You spoke before you thought about the words
"Do you realy think im worth of love and peace with this monstrosity of a...thing?"
You said with anger creeping in your tone as you gestured to your body.
"Damn sour cheeks do you ever stop being stubborn or were you always like this and i was soooo blinded by how pretty your soft cheeks and pretty eyes were."
He chuckled, his voice low and actually coming from his heart now.
And all of this, somehow made you feel less in a crisis and more like you're in a stupid teenage love movie where you two are the main characters. It always felt like this with him, with how thoughtful and how sweet he is like the tea he made for you, dripping with honey.
Your soft pink lips turned up into a small smile when you realised that he's not going anywhere without making you feel better and make you love yourself like the bad thoughts in your head were not there at all...
Even though he was "just your neighbour"...
The love in his eyes that you can see right now tells you a shit ton of things but you don't wanna dig into that right now and just enjoy how his presence and lingering touch are making you feel like a feather.
You didnt feel your cheeks get hot while thinking all of this, your cheeks and nose now blushing...
"How do you manage to fix everything every time I'm crumbled and all messy..."
"You know that's why im your favourite neighbour right?"
Ugh yeah that smug smile again,
"Yeah, sure... I guess I'm just happy you're here leon. Thanks for everything."
His free hand found your soft shoulder and gave you a firm squeeze
"Dont mention it angel...Now lets look through your dresses and let me choose what youre gonna wear tomorrow, yeah?"
And suddenly the world that shrinked down to you having an anxiety attack in your room just expanded back into this huge place where everything looked and felt like feather. The weight in your heart and mind easing with his presence and comfort...
The sweet tea that he made for you going cold on the coffee table, now forgotten...
I CANT BELIEVE IM DONE WRITING THIS, HELL I CANT BELIEVE I WROTE A FIC AFTER 3 YEARS??? OMG GUYS THANK YOU A LOT FOR SUPPORTING MY IDEA OF CHUBBY!READER UUGGGWGWHSHWHS LUV U ALL🩷🩷😭😭😭
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