heart on fire.

DORCAS A. MEADOWES ❝ she was fire enough to light the way and burn anything attempting to stop her ❞ xx. proud 'puff. siren school alum. former head girl. current prefect. future minister double cohort in world politics and international law and magical languages and world culture.

[dorkassmeadowcs]

@marlenethemenace​

The prefect dormitories were not as familiar to Marlene as she’d thought they would be by now. Rooming with D.W. and, more specifically, Eleanor, she’d imagined that she would have spent most of her nights cuddling up to Dorcas or Amelia in their private suites. Instead, she had laid awake most nights in September in her own bed, too distracted by her own mess of feelings to worry about whoever else was snoring five feet away in the dark.

But now that circumstances had, well, changed, Marlene found herself standing outside of Dorcas Meadowes’ suite, palms sweaty against the denim of her skirt as she rubbed them vigorously against her thighs.

Breathe, breathe, breathe, Marlene thought desperately. Dorcas won’t judge you. She had almost convinced herself by the time she knocked on the door.

“Anybody home?”

@dorkassmeadowcs

After Briar’s party and her discussion with Fabian, Dorcas had rededicated her time to school and Prefect duties. To the untrained eye, she was operating just as she always did - focused on her goals with an intensity in her gaze that intimidated many around her and a laughing grin that turned to a smirk within moments. The only real change with the subdued color of her lips. Typically painted in a number of garish colors - green was the only color she hadn’t used thus far in the semester - her lips were washed clean, coated in a clear gloss. Her smiles were more subdued and the debates she instigated in her classes only lasted a few minutes rather than the entire class periods they used to. 

She looked more approachable.

She looked like someone other than Dorcas Meadowes. 

She wondered if it should offend her that none of her friends had noticed any of this yet. 

A knock broke her from her musings, causing her to jolt on in her chair that were precariously leaned back onto the back two legs. Falling forward as the chair landed with a crash, Dorcas glanced at the open book once more before standing. Expecting a lost first year, she rubbed at her eyes, raw from crying, and pinched at her cheeks at greet the visitor. Hearing Marlene’s voice through the door, Dorcas ceased her rushed primping to open the door for her best friend.

As she yanked open the door, a tight smile pulled at her lips, though it curled into a frown after observing Marlene’s hesitation. “’Course I am. Librarian kicked me out,” she teased, opening the door wider to allow Marlene to come in. “What’s happening, love? Haven’t seen you in a while.”

[dorkassmeadowcs]

@fabiansacharmer​

“No.” It was an unusually blunt answer for Fabian, but after the start to the term he’d had, patience was scarce to begin with. And when the thing he needed patience for was a stinging jab to the heart—

“No, I’m not. Not when— Why wouldn’t I care?” Fabian took a step towards Dorcas, closing much of the awkward space between them. “Why would you think that? When have I ever given you reason to think I don’t care about you?”

There was a sinking sensation in Fabian’s chest then, a realization that dawned on him as though someone had cast lumos and shone their wand inside his brain. Perhaps it wasn’t that Dorcas thought Fabian didn’t care about her; perhaps it was that he couldn’t care for her in the way that she wanted. Had they both interpreted the things between them so differently that they stood looking at two very different sides of the same coin? Or had Fabian only thought to look at the other side because Amelia had entered his life? It was an overwhelming trail of thoughts to have, especially when he was buzzed at a house party, looking Dorcas in the eye.

How the hell did we get here?

"Dor—” Fabian looked to the sky, rolling his tongue tightly in his mouth as he waited for the right words to strike like lightning. “Just ‘cause it’s not what we thought it was doesn’t mean it’s nothing.” Were those the right words? Fabian wasn’t sure; he could only wait for Dorcas to tell him.

Dorcas was a bit taken aback by his frank answer, though her body language remained unchanged. “Sorry to hear that,” she said, bringing her new drink to her lips. 

Dorcas arched a brow, trying to remain calm. “Call me crazy, but caring about someone usually implies some sort of interaction with that person.” She nearly flinched at the sound of her voice, the sound of whining that she swore she would never stoop to. She told herself over and over and over again that she wouldn’t be this girl. Of course, that was far easier when she wasn’t interacting with her ex-boyfriend. “When’s the last time you’ve spoken to me- or, hell, even owled me - since we broke up? Because, I got to tell you, Fab, I don’t remember.” She pursed her lips, her grip tightening on the can in her hand. 

At his words, Dorcas couldn’t help but laugh - the sound high and tinkling, bordering on hysterical. “What we thought?” She asked, the question not searching for an answer. And just like that her patience snapped. “I thought it mattered -  that we mattered, that I mattered - to you. I don’t what the fuck you thought this was, but we clearly weren’t on the same page about any of this. So don’t you fucking dare act like this was a collective decision.”

Dorcas sucked in a breath through her teeth, stepping back from Fabian. Her eyes traveled skyward, trying to hold back the tears that were starting to gather at her eyes. “You know, even when were off, you didn’t ignore me. Or,” she laughed, that hysterical, humorless laugh, “I guess ignore isn’t the right word, is it? Forgot probably summed it up better, hm?” She blinked the tears away, decidedly not rubbing on her eyeliner. Swallowing the lump in her throat, she met Fabian’s gaze with a steely one of her own. “Who are they?” She asked, her meaning clear. She knew there was someone - there had to be, otherwise she would have to deal with the fact that she really wasn’t good enough for him and he’d wised up to that fact. 

[dorkassmeadowcs]

@rorykelly​

Rory had been standing near the bar for a while now, taking a breather to take everything in — the party that was so different from the church events she was used to attending and, of course, her run in with Emmeline. She’d known it was coming, but she still felt shaken, upset, and on edge. The girl was a welcome distraction. She giggled, head shaking from side to side. “I wouldn’t worry about it,” she advised, “I’ve been standing here a while and it seems like a free for all. I was more impressed at the way you drank it neat.” 

Dorcas smiled at the witch, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand to keep droplets from falling from her lips. “Seems like it,” she nodded, glancing around at the party goers. At the girl’s comment, she laughed. “Got lots of practice, I suppose.” She met the witch’s gaze, pausing when she vaguely recognized her from somewhere. “You look familiar. You a Puff?” She asked, trying to put her finger on where she might know the girl before her. She had been throwing and co-sponsoring events for all first years, but she was mostly interacting with them when she passed them in the corridor - which was rare, given her cohorts and her desire to stay on top of everything. Nevertheless, she tried to stay on top of students in her house. 

[dorkassmeadowcs]

@eleanorowe​

“Oh! Yeah –” Elle picked up one of the suspicious looking chocolates. “Here.”

Dorcas lifted the morsel, sniffing it briefly before biting into it. “Merlin’s fuckin’ beard,” she cursed. “Bloody jalapenos,” she wrinkled her nose, as she wrapped the remaining bite in a napkin. “I should be used to it, honestly. My mum used to make brownies with bits of jalapenos in them whenever by dad pissed her off,” she recalled, snorting as she remembered her father’s reaction. She directed her attention back to Eleanor after a beat. “Is there a reason you’re stealing food, babes? I’m pretty sure it’s open to all.”

[vhsmeme]

* interview the muse

‘ do you miss anyone? ’

‘ how are you doing? ’

‘ do you believe in ghosts? ’

‘ what makes you laugh? ’ 

‘ list your top three bands or singers. ’ 

‘ how many blankets do you sleep with? ’

‘ does your name hold any special meaning to you? ’

‘ gum, cake, pie or ice cream? ’

‘ favorite book? ’

‘ are you a good person? ’

‘ describe love. ’

‘ have you ever taken part in an uprising? ‘

‘ favorite song? ’

‘ name a guilty pleasure. ’

‘ the most embarrassing thing that’s happened to you today? ’

‘ tell me one truth and one lie. ’

‘ do you like people? ’

‘ what motivates you? ’

‘ describe the perfect weekend. ’

‘ any pet peeves? ’

‘ do you need a hug? ’

‘ would you like to have kids? ’

‘ do you have any tattoos? ’

‘ classical, oldies, punk, hip hop or country? ’

‘ when was the last time you cried? ’

‘ are you religious? ’

[dorkassmeadowcs]

@fabiansacharmer​

Fabian smiled in kind, only nodding in response. What else was there to say? He was stuck in his head, over-analyzing every possible sentence that came to mind. It hadn’t been this difficult before. Fabian hadn’t been too nervous to say the wrong thing. Dorcas hadn’t sounded like she was forcing the sort of politeness reserved for a stranger. Why was it like this now?

And then, like a punch to the gut, it hit Fabian. Bertha Jorkins. Had she gotten to Dorcas first? Fighting the instinct to run wildly away, Fabian hung back, leaning against the fence as he turned his gaze to Dorcas, studying her for hints that she didn’t give away.

“You alright?”

Dorcas felt the tension in the air, so thick she thought she might choke on it. It wasn’t like this - not ever. Even when they would fight or avoid each other, they didn’t treat each other like strangers. He was acting like he barely knew her, as if they hadn’t been integral parts of each other’s lives. Of course, she could say the same for herself. The difference, as far as she could tell, was she actually gave a shit about the lack of connection between them. 

She watched as recognition crossed his features. It was confirmation for her - the panic, carefully but not completely concealed by Fabian’s practiced casual lean against the fence. There was someone else. Did everyone else already know? Is that was the recognition was about? Had she really just been in her own world enough too long to hear about whoever he’d been seeing? 

At his question, Dorcas bit back a laugh. “Surprised you care, Fab.” The snapped retort was past her lips before she could stop it. She paused, shaking her head. “That came out harsher than I meant it to. I’d take it back but,” she sipped her drink. “I always told you I never lie to you.” The latter words seemed far less combative on the surface, but, she knew, they would cut deeper than her original quip. 

She cleared her throat, gaze traveling away from Fabian’s as she sipped her drink again. “What about you, Prewett? You alright?”

[damnthosewords]

i’m just curious, is it serious?

[dorkassmeadowcs]

@briarpritch​

“You! Yeah, you! Come dance with me! It’s my birthday, you can’t say no.” 

Dorcas was already in her second drink - read: half bottle - of the evening, making her in no state to argue with the prospect of dancing, especially with someone like Briar. Putting her drink down, she made her way over to the birthday girl, holding her arms out to grasp the other witch’s. “There’s no denying you, B.” Dorcas laughed, moving to the beat. 

[dorkassmeadowcs]

@fabiansacharmer​

Fabian turned towards Dorcas with a shy grin. He hadn’t seen her in some time, possibly not since the party he’d hosted before the term had begun. His conversation with Gideon rang in his years suddenly as if they’d only had it an hour before.

Things had changed quickly, hadn’t they?

“There’s some Dragon Barrel left.” Fabian handed Dorcas the cold can, his hand lingering for a second before he tore it away. “Or I could dig you out something else.”

Dorcas recognized the shy grin immediately, though she never dreamed it would ever be directed at her. Even when they weren’t together, they were still close - though, honestly, that was likely because they were always teetering on the edge of something. Now that something seemed off the table, it was like they really had nothing. 

That stung more than knowing he didn’t love her anymore. 

Dorcas bit back her hurt. She wouldn’t cry over this, over him, over them. She wasn’t that type of girl. She was always too much - too loud, too flirtatious, too invested - but she wouldn’t be the clingy, jealous ex-girlfriend. It wasn’t that she had anything to be jealous of - officially anyway. She knew Fabian well enough to tell when he was getting laid - emotionally or physically - and she knew - fucking bloody knew - that there was someone else. But she wouldn’t ask. She couldn’t ask. Even if she really wanted to know, she couldn’t bare to open her mouth. Or to watch him carefully select his words so he wouldn’t hurt her. 

At the sound of her favorite drink, she nodded, holding out her hand before he could even offer another option. She noticed the way his hand lingered, almost causing a smile to pull at her lips at the familiarity of the whole thing. Then he yanked his hand away and the spell was broken. The possibility of her - genuine - laughing smile disappeared. She faltered for a half a moment before forcing a grin on her face. “Dragon Barrell’ll work just fine, thanks.”

[dorkassmeadowcs]

@cecilybeckett​

“I usually prefer sophisticated cocktails but since we don’t have any of those around here, I am going to drink this one.” Cecily tried to her grimace, not really succeed. “This.. tastes interesting.”

“Yikes. Anytime anyone calls anything interesting, you know it’s absolute shite.” Dorcas offered the younger witch a raised eyebrow. “Clearly you haven’t been asking the right person to make you cocktails if you’re inclined to give up that quickly.” She shrugged, stepping around the makeshift bar to get her own drink. “What’s your usual poison?”

[dorkassmeadowcs]

@eleanorowe​

“You saw nothing.”

Dorcas snorted, smile pulling at her lips as she watched her friend steal the food. “I think I would be more inclined to ‘see nothing’ if you passed me one of those chocolate covered...” she glanced down, “whatever those are. Chocolate covered anything is good, right?”

[dorkassmeadowcs]

where: briar’s birthday party when: between 10 and 11 pm who: dorcas & OPEN

Dorcas had all but locked herself in the library the past few weeks. The start of term had all but destroyed her social life, not that she had tried all that hard to revive it. It had started with not being with Fabian and had deteriorated since then. Dorcas felt off balance, if she was being honest. She had overloaded this term, both with her classes and with her extracurriculars - though the latter was a godsend in its own right. Honestly, without her Prefect duties and club meetings, Dorcas doubted she would have any sort of human interaction outside of classes. She had finished her work for the next few weeks nearly an hour ago and, after one or two sips from a Stay Awake potion, she was out of her suite. 

Face painted with thick make up and fake smiles, Dorcas walked into the party with her head held high. She grinned at the many people she knew as she passed them, though her destination towards the alcohol never faltered. Finally making her way to the makeshift bar, she grabbed an unopened bottle of gin. She flicked the top off, taking a swig in one swift movement. Catching the eye of someone close to her, their eyebrows raised, she shrugged, grin pulling at her lips. “I’ll buy them another one. Scout’s honor.”

[dorkassmeadowcs]

@fabiansacharmer​

“Anyone want another round?”

Hearing Fabian’s voice caused Dorcas to gulp the rest of drink down quickly. “Sure,” she replied, wiping her mouth with her wrist in attempt to cover the droplets of Firewhiskey and dismay from her lips. “I’ll take another.”

[dorkassmeadowcs]

harry potter ask box meme

harry: do you consider yourself brave?

hermione: what is your favourite book?

ron: are you scared of spiders?

voldemort: what 3 items would you chose to be your horcruxes?

dumbledore: do you have many secrets?

snape: if you could read anyone's mind for a day, who would it be?

sirius: if you became an animagus, which animal would you choose?

remus: if you faced a boggart, which form would it take?

draco: be honest, do you worry about social status?

ginny: who would you let read your diary?

neville: are you passionate about any social causes?

luna: do other people tend to think of you as strange?

fred: have you ever played a prank on someone?

george: is humour important when considering a significant other?

bellatrix: are you easily manipulated by confident or powerful people?

hagrid: if you could have any creature as a pet (regardless of the law), which would you choose?

umbridge: are you passive aggressive?

viktor: are you athletic?

fleur: is physical appearance important to you?

tonks: if you could change your hair to any unnatural colour without damage, cost or regrowth, which colour would you choose?

kreacher: would you protect your friends' and family's secrets at all costs?

mad-eye: are you trusting of other people?

lockhart: do you ever elaborate on personal stories to improve your image?

dobby: what is your favourite item of clothing in your wardrobe at the moment?

[meanrunway]

Viktor & Rolf Couture SS 2019

[othelo]

I love girls who are proud and uninhibited about their intelligence and will brag about their accomplishments and take no shit from pretentious boys who look down on women in their field. girls who are outspoken and a bit arrogant and ambitious in a world where we are told that we must hide our intellect and to always put the needs of others (i.e. men) in front of our own are amazing

[dorkassmeadowcs]

when: september 13th, 3 pm where: by the black lake who: dorcas & OPEN 

Two weeks of school already gone, Dorcas was in her element; but she was about to be even more in her element. With two weeks under her belt, she had fulfilled her agreement with Professor Egg about not starting any debates in any of her classes. On Monday, she would be able to correct that bloody Ravenclaw about his ignorant statement on Goblin culture in the 1800s. Honestly, why was he even in the Gobbledegook course if he was only going to bash Goblins? She had nearly thrown her textbook at his head four times in the past week. The book was already in her hands as she raised it to toss at his head only to be thwarted by her seat mate. They had yanked her hand down before she could carry out her plan, or anyone else could catch her. 

So, she was celebrating. She could start debates - or fights, as everyone else called them - to her heart’s content now. Set up on a wide blanket beside the Black Lake, Dorcas scribbled the questions she hadn’t written down earlier this week, each of them sure to spark controversy. Every so often, she would reach for the floating saucer beside her, containing her favorite ( spiked ) tea and charmed to keep it from spilling.  A wide smile was pulling at her lips - painted the color of the sunset. Said smile wasn’t diminished at all as a shadow suddenly fell over her. She glanced up, barely registering who the newcomer was before returning to her list. “Perfect day for it, eh?”