Summary: Separated by an apartment wall, you and your arrogant, heavily-inked neighbour, Jeon Jungkook, are locked in a petty war. But when a confrontation sparks something between you two, the line between mutual hatred and pure obsession begins to blur.
Genre: neighbours to enemies to lovers, tattoo artist!jungkook, workaholic!y/n
Warnings: 18+, explicit sexual content, toxic/possessive dynamics, dom!jungkook, jealousy, rough sex, unprotected sex, penetrative sex, mirror sex (?), kinda public sex, creampie (wrap before you tap!!), orgasm denial, crying from overstimulation, choking, hair pulling, face slapping, degradation, praise, female receiving oral, jungkook is a player, usage of the pet name princess, they genuinely hate each other at first, eventual fluff!
wc: 11.9k
A/N: Guys, this one was crazy to write, and I love it!! I hope you enjoy reading!
The drywall separating apartment 4A and 4B wasn't just thin; it was practically non-existent. It was a structural joke, a cheap architectural oversight that ensured your personal life was entirely intertwined with the man living on the other side.
You knew his schedule by heart, not because you wanted to, but because you had no choice.
On Monday afternoons, it was the heavy, dragging sound of his combat boots hitting the hardwood floor around 1 PM, signalling he was finally awake. On Wednesdays, it was the low, rhythmic hum of his television playing old films until dawn. But the weekends were the worst. The weekends belonged to the bass, a deep, thumping vibration that rattled the framed prints on your living room wall, and the sharp, buzzing whir of a rotary tattoo machine.
Jeon Jungkook was a nuisance. He was also your neighbour, and you despised him.
To you, he was an arrogant, over-inked asshole who treated the apartment complex like his personal, twenty-four-hour playground. He dressed entirely in oversized black streetwear, smelled like a combination of raw tobacco and expensive leather, and also possessed a smirk that made you want to commit violence.
To him, you were a hyper-organized, stuck-up brat. He’d told you as much during your first real interaction three months ago, when you had politely, then not so politely, asked him to turn down his music at 3 AM.
"You need to unclench, Princess," he had drawled, leaning against his doorframe with a silver hoop piercing glinting in his lower lip. "Life is too short to spend it being a stuck-up brat."
Since then, it had been a war. You left precise, passive-aggressive notes on his door about tenant regulations. He responded by using those exact notes as coasters, leaving ring stains on the paper before taping them back to your door. If you glared at him in the hallway, he would just give you a lazy wave in return.
Tonight, however, was pushing you past your limit.
It was a Friday, hitting a miserable 1:45 AM. You had a gruelling performance review at work at nine o'clock that same morning, and your brain was fried. You had tried earplugs. You had tried white noise machines. You had tried burying your head beneath three different pillows.
But the noise from 4B was relentless. It wasn't the tattoo machine tonight. It was music, some R&B track that felt like it was pumping directly into your cerebral cortex, accompanied by the distinct, high-pitched moaning of a girl.
Thump. Thump. Thump.
Your eyes snapped open in the dark. Your jaw clenched so hard it ached. The moaning echoed through the wall again, followed by the low rumble of Jungkook’s laugh.
That was it, that was the final straw before your sanity snapped. Throwing your blankets aside, you slid out of bed. You didn't care that you were wearing an oversized, faded college t-shirt that hung loosely off one shoulder and a pair of grey sleep shorts. You didn't care that your hair was a chaotic, unruly nest. You were driven entirely by sleep deprivation and pure, unadulterated fury.
You stormed across your dark living room, yanked your front door open, and stepped out into the chilly, fluorescent-lit hallway. You found out that the music was even louder out here. You marched over to the door and raised your fist, slamming it against the wood with a force that threatened to splinter it.
"Jungkook!" you shouted over the bass. "Open the damn door!"
For a minute or two, nothing happened. Then, the music abruptly cut out, dropping the hallway into a ringing silence. You stood there, breathing heavily, your hands curled into tight fists at your sides.
Then the lock clicked, and the wooden door swung open.
Jungkook stood there, and the sight of him only fuelled your irritation. He was shirtless, wearing nothing but a pair of grey sweatpants that hung very low on his hip bones. His torso was a breathtaking, intimidating canvas of dark, intricate ink that wrapped around his ribs, a sprawling pattern that climbed his left side, and a sleeve that covered every inch of his right arm down to his knuckles. A few stray strands of damp, dark hair fell over his eyes.
He looked completely unbothered, his dark eyes raking over you, scanning your messy hair, your bare legs, and the angry flush creeping up your neck.
"Well, look who it is," Jungkook murmured, his voice raspy with a sleepiness that didn't match the hour. He leaned his heavy shoulder against the doorframe, crossing his tattooed arms over his chest. "The midnight inspector. Am I using too much oxygen in my apartment, Y/N?"
"Turn it off," you breathed, your voice shaking with the effort to keep from screaming. "Turn the music off, Jungkook. Shut the girl up. Shut yourself up. It is almost two in the morning."
Jungkook let out a mocking chuckle, tilting his head. "It's Friday. Some people actually enjoy their lives. You should try it sometime. Might help with..." He gestured vaguely to your rigid posture. "...whatever it is you have going on."
"I have a career going on!" you snapped, taking a sharp step forward, invading his space. The scent of him, that heavy cologne, hit your senses instantly, making your stomach do a strange flip. "Some of us don't make a living by stabbing people with ink and sleeping until noon. I have an actual life to attend to tomorrow, and your complete lack of basic human decency is ruining it."
Jungkook’s smile vanished. The playful, mocking glint in his eyes hardened into something sharp. He straightened up from the doorframe, instantly towering over you. He took a step out into the hallway, forcing you to back up half a step until the heel of your foot hit the opposite wall.
"A basic lack of human decency?" he repeated, his voice dropping an octave. He stepped closer, completely eclipsing you in his shadow. "You've been looking down your nose at me since the day you moved in, Princess. You think because you wear a blazer and work in an office that you're better than me?"
"I know that I’m better than you," you shot back, refusing to break eye contact even as your heart began to beat frantically against your ribs. You could feel the heat radiating off his bare chest. You could see the subtle rise and fall of his collarbone, the small scar on his cheek, the absolute intensity in his big eyes.
"You're a brat," he whispered, leaning down just enough that his minty breath fanned across your forehead. "A spoiled little brat who likes to complain because she has nothing better to do. You love this. You love coming out here and picking fights with me."
"I hate you," you hissed, your nails digging into the palms of your hands. "I hate everything about you. I hate your music, I hate your stupid tattoo machine, and I hate the fact that I can hear your revolving door of guests through my wall."
Jungkook’s eyes darkened, his gaze dropping down to your lips for a fraction of a second before snapping back to your eyes. A tension dropped over the hallway, friction that had nothing to do with noise complaints and everything to do with the fact that you were both hyper-aware of how little clothing the other was wearing.
"Hey, Kook? Everything okay out there?"
A soft, feminine voice called out from inside his apartment. A pretty girl with brunette hair, wearing one of Jungkook's oversized black t-shirts, peeked her head around the corner of his entryway.
The spell broke.
Jungkook didn't look back at her. His eyes remained locked on yours, his jaw clenched, a muscle ticking in his cheek. The intensity in his gaze was almost bruising, a silent, furious challenge.
"Yeah," Jungkook said, his voice rough and strained as he finally took a step back, breaking the suffocating bubble of space between you. "Everything's fine. My neighbour was just leaving."
"Turn it down," you said one last time, though the fire in your voice had died down into a shaky whisper.
Jungkook didn't answer, he just gave you one long, unreadable look, one that made your skin prickle with a chill, before backing into his apartment and shutting the door hard enough to rattle the frame. A second later, the hallway fell into absolute, dead silence. You stood against the wall for a full minute, your knees trembling slightly. You breathed in the lingering scent of his cologne, your chest was tight and your mind was racing.
You hated him. You absolutely hated him with every single bone in your body.
But as you walked back into your dark, silent apartment and crawled back into bed, you couldn’t help but feel your stomach drop as you thought about the girl he was with. With a furious mind, you eventually fall back asleep, hoping to never see anything like that again.
You wondered how much lack of sleep the human body could survive off of without going clinically insane.
Your performance review at nine o'clock had been an exercise in acting. You had smiled, nodded, and talked about your quarterly goals through exhaustion, all while a pounding headache stabbed at your skull. Every time your boss praised your "attention to detail," your mind flashed to a pair of unreadable eyes and a heavy tattoo sleeve illuminated by the flickering hallway light.
By the time you unlocked the main entrance to the apartment complex at 5:45 PM, you were running on pure survival instinct. Your feet ached from your stupid heels, your shoulders were tense, and all you wanted was a hot shower, a bowl of instant ramen, and to watch Love Island.
The universe, unfortunately, had other plans.
When you stepped off the elevator onto the fourth floor, your path was entirely obstructed. Right in front of your door, not 4B, but your door, 4A, were three massive, heavy-duty cardboard boxes. They were bound in rough packing tape and stamped with a bold logo.
You stopped dead in your tracks, your purse dragging against your thigh. Your eyes dropped to the shipping label.
Recipient: Jeon Jungkook / Ink & Iron Studio
Address: 402 Genevieve Lane, Apt 4B
"Are you kidding me?" you muttered to the empty hallway.
The delivery driver had carelessly put the packages at the wrong door. You looked over at door 4B. You doubted that Jungkook was even home, assuming he was out doing annoying, reckless things.
With a frustrated sigh, you dropped your purse. You couldn't just leave them out here; the building management was notoriously strict about hallway obstructions, and if anyone got fined, it would likely be you since they were stacked against your door. Crouching down in your pencil skirt, you gripped the sides of the top box and hoisted it. It was incredibly heavy, filled with what felt like solid metal components, likely tattoo machines, power supplies, or heavy jars of ink.
Groaning under the weight, you unlocked your door, pushed it open with your foot, and began the agonizing process of dragging Jeon Jungkook’s packages into your entryway just to clear the walkway. By the time all three boxes were sitting inside your pristine, minimalist apartment, your hair was falling out of its neat clip and a fine sheen of sweat coated your forehead.
You slammed your door shut with a loud sigh, locked it, and promised yourself you would make him beg for them later.
An hour later, the hot shower had done little to soothe your frayed nerves. You were dressed in a pair of silk pajamas, ones that made you feel slightly put together, and were just waiting for your water to boil on the stove when a knock rattled your front door.
It was a firm, demanding sequence that echoed through your quiet living room, and you instantly knew who it was. You walked over to the door, pulling the silk lapels of your shirt a little higher, and swung it open.
Jungkook stood under the hallway light, but he didn't look like the chaotic, shirtless disruptor from the night before. He wore a crisp, black button-down shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, exposing the intricate details of his forearms, and a pair of reading glasses was pushed up into his messy dark hair. He smelled like rain and the distinct, expensive scent of fresh leather.
He had his phone out, but his head snapped up the moment the door opened. His dark eyes instantly raked over you, taking in the smooth silk of your pyjamas, and the bare skin of your legs. A subtle shift occurred in his expression, the irritation fading into something heavy and focused.
"My tracking email says my shipment has arrived," Jungkook said, "And considering my doorstep is completely empty, I figured my favourite brat took them hostage."
You decided to completely ignore that last part, even if the sound of him calling you his made your stomach swirl with butterflies. Leaning against your doorframe, you crossed your arms, trying to ignore the way his gaze lingered on the exposed skin of your legs. "They were dropped off at the wrong door, Jungkook. But because I actually care about building regulations, I dragged them inside so we wouldn't get flagged by management."
Jungkook’s eyes flicked past your shoulder, spotting the three large cardboard boxes sitting stacked neatly in your entryway. A slow, infuriating smirk tugged at the corner of his lips.
"Look at you," he drawled, stepping closer, completely ignoring the unspoken boundary of your threshold. "A good Samaritan. And here I thought you hated me."
"I do hate you," you shot back quickly, your voice perhaps a bit too breathless. "I dragged them in because I didn't want your garbage associated with my apartment number. Take them and get out."
Jungkook took another step forward, crossing the threshold entirely. He entered your apartment without an invitation, his heavy combat boots clicking against your polished hardwood floors. The sheer size of him suddenly made your entryway feel microscopic. He was too large, too loud, too much for the quiet, curated space you kept.
"Nice place," he murmured, his eyes scanning your neat living room, the perfectly aligned throw pillows, the single candle burning on the coffee table. He looked entirely out of place, like a dark ink stain on a white canvas. He turned back to you, leaning his hip against your entryway table, "A little sterile, don't you think? I’m not surprised though, it matches your personality."
"Get out of my apartment, Jungkook," you scoffed, your hand gripping the edge of your shorts. He was barely six inches away from you. You could see the faint shadow of stubble along his sharp jawline, and just how plump his bottom lip is.
"Make me," he countered softly.
The words weren't a threat; they were a direct challenge. The air between you turned heavy, filled with the unresolved situation from the previous night. The memory of him looming over you in the hallway, his bare chest inches from your face, flared to life in your mind, making your hands twitch.
Jungkook noticed. His gaze dropped to your chest, watching the rapid rise and fall of your breathing beneath the silk, before travelling back up to lock onto your eyes. He tilted his head down, his voice dropping into a quiet whisper that sent a shiver straight down your spine.
"You're shaking, Y/N."
"I'm angry that you’re violating my space," you lied, your jaw tightening as you stared back at him, refusing to let him see how much his presence was rattling you. "Just take your boxes and leave."
Jungkook didn't move. He reached out, his large, tattooed hand hovering just inches away from your face. For a terrifying, exhilarating second, you thought he was going to touch you, that his fingers were going to slide against your skin, possibly caressing you. Your eyes widened slightly, your body freezing in anticipation, your core pulsing with a spike of heat.
But he didn't touch you. Instead, his fingers brushed against the stray strands of hair that were clinging to your cheek, gently tucking them behind your ear without his skin ever actually making contact with yours. The sheer restraint of the gesture was agonizing, a physical tease that made your pulse skyrocket so much that you thought you were going to have a heart attack.
"You're all talk," he whispered, his eyes staring into yours with a terrifying amount of certainty. "You pretend you can't stand the sight of me, but you're hyper-aware of every single thing I do. You like me, baby. It's the only time you actually let yourself feel something."
"You don't know anything about me," you hissed, your hands curling into tight fists against your sides to keep from reaching out and shoving him, or pulling him closer.
"I know you've been thinking about last night," he murmured, his face coming so close you could feel the warmth of his breath against your lips. He smelled so good it was dizzying, an intoxicating pull that was corrupting your common sense by the second. "Just like I have."
Before you could process the confession, before you could fire back a retort or even question him about his words, Jungkook abruptly straightened up. The intensity broke instantly as he stepped away from you, reaching down to grab the heaviest box from the stack.
He lifted it effortlessly, his biceps flexing against the fabric of his shirt, the tattoos shifting dynamically with the movement. You prayed in that moment that he didn’t just catch you ogling his biceps.
"I'll take the rest of these off your hands," he said, his tone shifting back to that lazy, casual tone, though his eyes still held a lingering heat. He walked out into the hallway, setting the first box down by his door before returning for the second.
You stood frozen by your open door, your skin practically vibrating from the near-miss of his touch. You watched him silently as he moved the remaining boxes, his broad back shifting under the crisp black fabric of his shirt.
When the last box was cleared, he stood in his own doorway, looking back at you across the narrow expanse of the hallway. He pushed his reading glasses down onto the bridge of his nose, the frames casting a sharp shadow over his dark eyes.
"Thanks for holding onto my package, Y/N," he said, a slow, wicked smirk spreading across his face as he emphasized the last word. "Have a good night. Try to get some sleep."
He stepped into apartment and shut the door, the click of his lock echoing in the quiet hallway.
You stood there for a long moment, staring at the blank wood of his door. Your heart was hammering against your ribs like a trapped bird, and your lower stomach was tight with an unfulfilled ache. You walked back into your apartment, slamming the door shut and locking it with a trembling hand.
The water on your stove was boiling over, but you didn't even notice. You leaned your back against the door, closing your eyes, completely consumed by the realization that the war between you was no longer about noise, and it was spiralling out of your control.
Jealousy was an ugly emotion. It didn't slip into your life quietly; it tore through your chest, making a mockery of you.
What made it entirely unbearable was its absurdity. You had no right to feel jealous. Jeon Jungkook was not yours. He was a chaotic, frustrating man who lived on the other side of a paper-thin wall, and was a man you actively claimed to despise to anyone who would listen. Yet, over the last forty-eight hours, the unwanted emotion had taken up permanently in the pit of your stomach, intensifying every time you heard his door click open or caught the distant sound of a feminine laugh.
The tipping point arrived on Saturday evening.
You had given up on trying to relax in your apartment. The silence felt less like peace and more like an interrogation, something that left you entirely too much time to think about the weight of his gaze, the sound of his voice, and the agonizing restraint of his fingers tucking your hair behind your ear. Driven by a restless need to escape your own thoughts, you had left the building around 9 PM to walk to the 24-hour market down the street, buying things you didn't need just to kill the time.
When you pushed through the glass doors of the apartment lobby to return, the universe decided to test the last small bits of your sanity.
Jungkook was standing by the mailboxes. He wasn't alone.
She was beautiful, painfully, effortlessly so. She wore a cropped leather jacket that matched his dark denim and possessed a confidence that shouted she belonged in his world. She was laughing, her head tilted back, her hand resting casually against the broad expanse of Jungkook’s chest. Her manicured fingers traced the fabric of his shirt, right over the spot where his heart beat, and Jungkook was looking down at her with an expression that you had never seen before.
Your footsteps halted on the polished tile floor. For a single, irritating second, the breath was completely knocked from your lungs. The surge of jealousy that hit you was so violent it made you dizzy. You wanted to march over there, rip her hand off his chest, and kiss him right in front of her.
Instead, your fingers tightened around the plastic handles of your grocery bag until your knuckles turned white. You forced your chin up, your expression hardening into a mask of pure ice, and began walking toward the elevators.
The sound of your sneakers against the tile cut through the quiet lobby.
Jungkook’s head snapped up instantly. The relaxed, easy smile vanished from his face the moment he looked at you. The shift in his demeanour was instantaneous; his shoulders squaring as his gaze tracked your movement across the room. He didn't look at the woman anymore. He didn't listen to whatever she was saying. His focus was entirely pinned to you.
But, you didn't look back. You stared straight ahead at the metallic doors of the elevator, pressing the button with a sharp jab.
Through the reflection in the polished steel doors, you watched the woman say something to him, pouting slightly as she noticed his detachment. Jungkook didn't even glance at her. He muttered a brief response, his eyes still burning a hole into the back of your head from across the lobby.
When the elevator doors finally opened, you stepped inside and turned around. For a fraction of a second, your eyes clashed with his across the expanse of the lobby. Then, the doors slid shut, leaving you alone in the quiet metal box.
The retaliation came less than twenty-four hours later.
On Sunday evening, a male colleague from your work, Eun-woo, offered to drop you off after a grueling, multi-hour project. Eun-woo was everything Jungkook was not. He was polished, predictable, and exceptionally polite. He parked his sleek sedan directly in front of your apartment building, killing the engine to turn and smile at you.
"You look exhausted, Y/N," Eun-woo said softly, reaching across the console to gently pat your forearm. "You've been working too hard. Let me take you out for dinner tonight. No talk about quarterly projections, I promise."
You opened your mouth to politely decline, but before the words could leave your lips, a sensation washed over you. It was that familiar, prickling heat on your skin, the unmistakable feeling of being watched.
Your eyes naturally drifted past Eun-woo’s shoulder, looking toward the concrete steps of the building entrance.
Jungkook was standing there.
He was wearing an oversized black hoodie with the hood pulled down, his dark hair messy and windswept. He had an unlit cigarette resting between his lips, and his hands were shoved deep into the front pocket of his sweatshirt. He wasn't moving. He looked like a statue carved from stone, his head tilted slightly downward, his eyes completely cold, and fixed entirely on Eun-woo’s hand resting against your forearm.
The look on his face was one you had never seen before. It wasn't the teasing, arrogant smirk of your neighbour. It was the glare of a man watching someone touch something that belonged exclusively to him. The animosity radiating off his frame was so strong it seemed to warp the very air around the car.
Eun-woo, entirely oblivious to the guy staring at him through the glass, smiled warmly. "What do you say?"
"I... I can't tonight, Eun-woo," you stammered, your voice breathless as you kept your eyes locked on Jungkook. "But thank you for the ride. I'll see you in the office tomorrow."
You practically scrambled out of the passenger seat, grabbing your purse and stepping onto the curb. The moment the car door slammed shut and Eun-woo pulled away, the space between you and Jungkook shrunk.
You walked up the concrete steps, your heart in your throat. Jungkook didn't move an inch to let you pass. He stood directly in the center of the double doors, forcing you to stop a mere foot away from him.
The scent of him, wrapped around you instantly, suffocating your anger and replacing it with a dizzying tension.
"Step aside, Jungkook," you said, your voice tight, though you hated the slight tremor that betrayed your composure.
He didn't move. He slowly took the unlit cigarette from his lips, holding it between two ink-stained fingers, his jaw clenching so hard you thought you saw a muscle twitch beneath his perfect skin.
"Who the hell was that?"
The sheer audacity of the question sparked a defensive fire in your veins. You glared back at him, scoffing loud while your chest rose and fell heavily. "None of your business. Move."
"It becomes my business when I have to watch some boring, predictable suit touch you," he hissed, taking a step forward, his massive frame completely blocking the entrance to the building. "Is that your type, Y/N? Safe? Predictable? Someone who asks permission before they even look at you?"
"At least he has manners," you spat back, your hands curling into fists against your thighs as you fought the overwhelming urge to press your palms against his chest just to feel the thud of his heart. "At least he doesn't treat his apartment like a revolving door for whatever girl that happens to breathe in his direction. Go back inside, Jungkook. I'm sure your friend from last night is waiting for a call back."
Jungkook’s eyes flared, satisfaction flickering through the anger in his gaze. He let out a breathless laugh that sounded entirely devoid of joy.
"Oh," he whispered, stepping so close his chest brushed against yours, trapping you against the cold metal railing of the steps. "So that's what this is. You’re jealous."
"I’m not jealous!" you lied, your voice rising slightly under the weight of the suffocating proximity.
"You are," he corrected, his voice dropping into a whisper that felt like a physical touch against your skin. He leaned in, his lips close to the shell of your ear, his breath hot against your cold skin. "You were practically burning a hole in the back of my head last night, baby. I could feel you from across the room. You hated seeing her hand on me. Admit it."
"You're so delusional," you gasped out, your head tilting back against the railing, your eyes widening as you stared up at his sharp profile. The urge to reach out, to wrap your arms around his neck and pull him down into a kiss, was so overwhelming your entire body ached with it. Your skin was screaming for the contact he was withholding.
"Tell me I'm lying," Jungkook commanded, his gaze dropping to your mouth, his own breathing heavy and ragged. His hand twitched at his side, his fingers flexing as if he were fighting every instinct he possessed to keep from grabbing your waist. "Tell me you don't want to rip my shirt off every time you see me. Tell me you don't think about me when you're lying in your bed alone, touching yourself."
He whispered that last part, like he knew that he caught you red handed. Your face instantly burned, a stupid blush filling your cheeks. "I hate you," you whispered, the words losing all their venom, sounding more like a desperate plea for mercy.
"Good," Jungkook growled, his eyes locking back onto yours with a terrifying amount of intent. "Keep hating me. Because the moment you stop, Y/N, I'm not going to let you walk back into that apartment alone."
Then, he moved away. His chest heaving as he stared down at you for one last, agonizing second. The restraint between you was a thin wire, vibrating so violently it threatened to snap both of you in half.
Without another word, Jungkook turned, shoved the glass doors open, and walked into the building, leaving you standing on the concrete steps in the freezing air, gasping for breath, completely consumed by a fire that you never signed up for.
You had lost the argument the moment your friends showed up at your apartment door carrying a garment bag and a bottle of cheap prosecco. Driven by what they called a "mandatory intervention for a workaholic," they had stripped you of your comfortable sweatpants, forced you into a sleek black dress that clung to your curves like a second skin, and dragged you out into the weekend night.
Now, standing in the middle of Prism, one of the city’s exclusive, packed clubs, you regretted every single life choice that had led you here.
The environment was definitely an assault on the senses. Neon blue and magenta strobe lights cut through a haze of smoke, flashing in sync with an industrial beat that vibrated through the soles of your strapped heels. The bass was a physical force, thumping against your heart.
Spitefully, your brain immediately made the connection. It felt exactly like apartment 4B on a Saturday night.
"Come on, Y/N! Take a sip!" your friend shouted over the roar of the crowd, shoving a vodka cranberry into your hand. "You’ve been a ghost all week. Live a little!"
You managed a smile, taking a swallow of the bittersweet alcohol. The drink burned its way down your throat, doing absolutely nothing to soothe the restlessness that had been clawing at your insides since your conversation with Jungkook on the building steps. You felt entirely out of place among the sea of hot bodies. Your mind was a long loop of dark irises, the smell of cigarettes, and the memory of his broad chest brushing against your own.
Desperate for a moment of peace, you stepped back from the edge of the pulsating dance floor, leaning your shoulder against a cold, mirrored pillar near the VIP lounge. You took another slow sip of your drink, your eyes aimlessly roaming the layout of the club.
And then, your heart completely stopped.
Situated in a semi-private leather booth was a group that looked like they had crawled straight out of a high-fashion editorial. They were effortlessly cool, heavily tatted, and radiating an aura of untouchable arrogance.
Sitting right in the centre of them, a glass of amber whiskey held loosely between his fingers, was Jungkook.
The breath caught in your throat, a violent surge of shock rushing to your face. He was stripped of the oversized streetwear and the studio gear. He was wearing a midnight-black silk button-down shirt, the top three buttons casually undone to expose the sharp lines of his collarbones and the ink that climbed up the side of his shoulder. A silver chain caught the flashing neon lights, glinting against his chest. His dark hair was styled as a mullet, exposing the brutal symmetry of his jawline.
He was surrounded by his friends, likely the other artists he hung out with, but your eyes didn't linger on them. They snapped instantly to the woman sitting on the armrest of his booth. She was a striking beauty in an incredibly short silver dress, leaning down to whisper something into his ear, her hand resting casually on the back of his neck.
Dread bloomed in the pit of your stomach, so intense it made your hand tremble against your glass. The same toxic, nauseating jealousy from the lobby bloomed to life, hotter and more dangerous than before. You watched, your jaw clenching, as Jungkook took a slow sip of his drink, his face expressionless as the woman laughed at something his friend said.
As if he somehow sensed the weight of your gaze, Jungkook’s head turned. His dark eyes cut through the flashing strobe lights, scanning the crowded floor below with a lazy, bored detachment, until they hit the mirrored pillar.
Until they hit you.
The shift in his demeanour was instantaneous. The bored, relaxed slouch vanished as his posture went straight. He didn't blink, only because his gaze locked onto you with the force of a vice grip, his eyes that were almost terrifying under the flashing blue lights. He raked his eyes down your body, tracking the sharp line of your collarbone, the tight fit of the black dress, and the bare skin along your legs.
The woman in the silver dress reached down, trying to draw his attention back to her, her fingers brushing his jaw. But, Jungkook didn't even look at her. With a cold, dismissive flick of his wrist, he brushed her hand away, his focus entirely on you.
The silent, cross-room standoff was constricting. The music roared around you, and you were sure that your friends were already on the dance floor, but the space between your pillar and his booth felt completely devoid of air. You raised your chin, giving him a cold, defiant glare, refusing to look away first.
“Hey, beautiful. You look like you’re having a miserable time.”
The unfamiliar voice shattered the connection. A tall, well-dressed man in a fitted grey shirt had materialized in your space, leaning against the pillar beside you with a confident, practiced smile. He held a fresh drink out toward you. "Can I buy you something better than whatever that is?"
You blinked, trying to clear the fog of Jungkook’s gaze from your brain. "No, thank you. I'm okay with this drink" you said, your tone polite but icy.
The man didn't take the hint. He took a step closer, invading your personal space, his hand coming up to rest on the mirror just above your shoulder. "Come on, just one drink. A girl like you shouldn't be standing alone in a dark corner."
Before you could fire back a sharp rejection, a shift occurred in the atmosphere.
"She said no."
The man in the grey shirt froze, looking up slowly. Jungkook was standing there. He had somehow left the VIP section with a terrifying amount of speed, and the look on his face was enough to make the other man visibly pale. Jungkook loomed over you, his chest expanding with an angry breath, his hands shoved deep into the pockets of his dark trousers.
"You got a problem, man?" the guy stammered, trying to maintain his bravado but failing miserably under Jungkook’s presence.
"Yeah," Jungkook replied, taking a slow step forward that forced the man back a foot. "I have a problem with you breathing my air. Walk away. Right now."
There was no negotiation in his tone. The man in the grey shirt looked between Jungkook’s ink-covered hands and the look in his eyes, swallowed hard, and retreated into the crowd without another word.
The moment he was gone, Jungkook turned on you.
The anger radiating off him was so strong it made your skin prickle with a terrifying sensation. Before you could speak, his large hand shot out, his ink-stained fingers gripping your wrist. His grip wasn't painful, but it was stubborn, completely unmoving as he dragged you away from the pillar, pulling you through the crowded venue toward the corridor that led to the private restrooms and emergency exits.
"Jungkook, let go of me!" you gasped, your heels clicking frantically against the floor as you tried to pull back, but it was like trying to move a mountain.
He didn't answer until he had dragged you into a secluded part of the hallway, away from the prying eyes of the club-goers. He shoved open a door, pulling you into a quiet stairwell where the music was reduced to a muffled heartbeat through the walls.
He released your wrist, turning around to face you, his chest lifting under the black shirt. He slammed his hand against the concrete wall beside your head, leaning down until his face was a mere inch from yours, trapping you entirely within the shadow of his body.
"What do you think you're doing?" he hissed, his jaw clenching so hard a muscle ticked violently beneath his skin. "You wear a dress like this out in public? You let random bastards back you into a corner?"
The hypocrisy of his anger made your own frustration explode. You pressed your palms against his chest, feeling the thud of his heart beneath the silk, trying to shove him back, but he didn't move an inch.
"I can wear whatever I want, Jungkook!" you shouted back, your eyes flashing with a mix of anger and desire. "I don't belong to you! Why don't you go back to your VIP booth? I'm sure the girl in the silver dress is missing her hand on your neck!"
Jungkook let out a scoff, his eyes dropping to your mouth before snapping back to your eyes, a possessive satisfaction flickering through the fury in his gaze.
"You were watching me," he whispered, his voice dropping into a rough tone that made your core pulse with heat. He stepped closer, his thighs brushing against the thin fabric of your dress, pinning you against the cold concrete wall. "You hated it. You hated seeing her touch me."
"I don't care about you," you lied, your breathing ragged, your fingers curling into the silk of his shirt. "I don’t care about the girls you’re always with.”
"You're a liar, Y/N," he growled, his hand leaving the wall to cup the side of your jaw, his rough, calloused thumb pressing firmly against your chin, tilting your head up. The contact was electric, a blinding rush that made your knees tremble. He leaned down, his lips brushing against the shell of your ear, his hot breath sending a violent shiver down your spine. "You've been losing your mind over me all these months, just like I've been losing my mind over you. I look at you in this dress, and all I can think about is ripping it off your body."
"Then do it," the words slipped from your lips before your pride could stop them, a challenge born from months of agonizing restraint.
Jungkook froze, his breath hitching against your skin. He pulled back just enough to look into your eyes, his pupils completely dilated. He was waiting for consent, something that gave him the permission to touch you however he wanted. In response, you gave him an eyebrow raise, challenging him.
Jungkook didn’t answer with words. The last thread of his restraint snapped with a beautiful finality. Before you could even inhale, his mouth crashed down onto yours.
It was a violent claim, a collision of months of frustration and denial. He tasted like expensive whiskey and cigarettes, his tongue forcing its way past your mouth with a bruising hunger that made your head spin. His hand clamped around your throat, with a firm pressure that anchored your head against the wall, forcing you to take the absolute depth of his mouth.
You groaned into the kiss, your hands flying up to his chest, your fingers clawing desperately at the midnight-black silk of his shirt. You ripped at the other buttons, wanting the barrier gone, wanting the tattooed reality of his skin against yours. A few buttons scattered across the concrete floor with a sharp, clicking echo, exposing the hard, carved lines of his chest.
Jungkook tore his mouth away from yours, his breathing a ragged, broken wheeze. "You asked for this," he growled, whispering against your skin. "I’m not going to hold back now.”
He didn't even touch the zipper of your dress. His fingers hooked into the hem of the sleek black fabric and yanked it upward with a brutal, impatient force, gathering the material around your waist and leaving your bare legs completely exposed to the chilly air of the stairwell. His large hands, rough and searing hot, slid up the inside of your thighs, his palms scraping against your sensitive skin with a friction that made you shiver.
When his hand hit the centre of your lace underwear, he let out a satisfied chuckle. You were already dripping, the thin fabric completely soaked through.
"Look at you," Jungkook muttered, his thumb rubbing heavily over your swollen core through the wet lace, your hips arching off the wall automatically. "Wet for me in a dirty stairwell. Tell me how much you hate me now, Y/N. Say it while you're shaking in my hands."
"Jungkook—fuck, please," you gasped, your fingers digging into the muscles of his shoulders as he hooked his fingers into the waistband of your underwear and ripped them down your legs, discarding them carelessly on the concrete steps.
He stepped between your knees, his massive, denim-clad thighs forcing your legs wide apart. He fumbled with the belt of his trousers, the metal buckle clinking loudly in the quiet space. He shoved his pants down just enough to free his length, and the sight of his thick cock already leaking with pre-cum sent adrenaline through your body.
Jungkook didn't ease you into it. He grabbed your right thigh, hoisting it up over his hip, anchoring you against his broad frame. He guided his tip to your dripping entrance, paused for a fraction of a second to lock his eyes onto yours, and pushed himself inside you.
The fullness of him stretched you open so fast that a breathless cry tore from your throat. Your eyes widened in temporary shock, your walls clamping around him, desperately trying to accommodate the size of him. Jungkook froze, his head dropping into the crook of your neck as a shudder wracked his entire body. His jaw clenched so hard the muscles in his face ticked, a deep, guttural groan vibrating right against your collarbone.
"Fuck," he panted, his voice a strained, broken sound. "You're so tight... Wrap your other leg around me. Now."
You obeyed blindly, your pride entirely incinerated by the blinding rush of pleasure. You hooked your left leg around his waist, lifting yourself completely off the floor. Jungkook caught you effortlessly, his large hands locking onto the undersides of your thighs, fingers digging into your flesh with a bruising touch that you were sure were going to leave dark marks on your skin.
With your legs wrapped around him, Jungkook began to move.
The pace was frenzied, driven by a rawness that had everything to do with possession. He pulled back until his tip was nearly sliding out, only to pound himself back into you with a slamming force that made the breath hitch in your chest. Every single thrust was deep, hitting your G-spot with brutal precision that made your vision blur into white spots.
Thud. Thud. Thud.
The sound of your skin slapping against his filled the isolated stairwell, competing with the muffled, distant heartbeat of the club’s bass through the heavy service door.
"Jungkook, wait—it's too much," you sobbed out, your head tossing back against the concrete wall as your orgasm began to build. Your core was pulsing, the stretch of his big cock pushing you to the absolute brink of sanity.
"I'm not stopping," he growled, his pace quickening, his thrusts becoming harder and more accelerated. He leaned forward, crushing his bare chest against your sensitive nipples through the ruined fabric of your dress. He grabbed your jaw with his one hand, forcing your face up, his eyes burning into yours. "Look at me. Don't close your eyes. I want to see you come."
You held his gaze, your mind completely shattered. He was consuming you, erasing every single boundary you had spent months building.
The orgasm started deep within your core, a sudden tightening that clamped around his length like a fist.
"Jungkook—I'm coming—I'm going to—"
"Do it," he commanded, his voice breathless, his lips twisting into a smirk, as he delivered more desperate slams, driving his pelvis flush against yours. "Come for me, Y/N. Take all of it."
Your orgasm crashed over you with the violence of a physical blow. You screamed his name into the empty stairwell, your body convulsing, your walls rippling around him in intense waves. The sensation of your release was the exact breaking point Jungkook needed. With a moan, he drove himself into you one last time, pushing his cock as deeply as possible. His cock pulsed within your heat as he filled you, his head dropping onto your shoulder as he gasped for air like a drowning man.
The silence that followed was broken only by the loud, echoing sound of your tangled, ragged breathing.
Jungkook didn't let you down immediately. He remained buried deep inside you, his forehead resting against your shoulder, his skin slick with sweat, his heart hammering. His hands slowly relaxed their bruising grip on your thighs, his fingers gently tracing the marks he had left behind on your skin.
Slowly, the haze of lust began to leave, leaving behind a hyper-aware intimacy that felt completely foreign.
He pulled out with a soft, wet sound, a breathy sigh escaping his lips as he adjusted his clothing, his movements uncharacteristically quiet. He reached down, picking up your ruined underwear from the steps and sliding them into his pocket before turning back to look at you.
You were leaning against the wall, your dress still bunched around your waist, your chest heaving, your legs trembling so badly you could barely stand.
Jungkook didn't say a word. He reached out, his hands gently grasping the hem of your black dress and pulling it back down, smoothing the fabric over your hips with a tenderness that completely contrasted the violence of the last ten minutes. He reached up, a thumb gently wiping away a stray tear of overstimulation from your cheek, then he kissed your lips softly.
"Come on," Jungkook whispered, his voice still raspy, his fingers tangling with yours as he pulled you toward the exit door. "We're going home. And you're staying in my bed tonight."
The taxi ride back to the apartment was pure agony. His large palm was wedged between your thighs, his fingers damp with your own fluids, pressing hard against your swollen core every time the car hit a bump in the asphalt.
You had to bite the collar of his shirt to keep from crying out in the back seat, while Jungkook stared out the window, his jaw clenched so tight the wire of his jawline looked sharp enough to cut.
“Jungkook… I can’t—” you whispered against his collarbone, drool leaking out of your mouth. His fingers kept teasing your clit, ruthlessly edging you. You were convinced he just wanted to see you cry.
But before he could let you finish, the taxi stopped to a halt, right outside your apartment complex. The moment his apartment door slammed shut behind you, his restraint snapped again.
There was no walk to the bedroom. Jungkook grabbed your shoulders and spun you around, shoving you face-first against the matte-black kitchen island. Your palms slapped against the cold stone counter to catch your weight, your breath hitching as he immediately crowded your back, his massive, solid chest flattening against your spine.
"Jungkook—"
"Quiet," he growled, his voice a quiet rasp.
He didn't waste a single second. His hands hooked into the waist of your black dress, pulling the fabric up until it sat bunched around your ribs, leaving your lower body completely bare to his gaze. He reached down, grabbing your hips with a bruising grip, his thumbs digging into the soft flesh.
You heard the sharp snap of his belt loosening, the zipper of his trousers tearing open. He guided his cock right against your dripping pussy, rubbing his swollen tip against you twice until you were sobbing into the stone countertop, begging for the impact. With a tilt of his hips, Jungkook drove himself into you from behind.
He buried his entire length into your pussy in one deep thrust. The force of the entry rattled you, a loud, broken wail tearing from your throat. Your hips buckled under the weight, but his hands locked onto your waist like iron bands, holding you perfectly in place, forcing your body to take every single inch.
"Fuck, this pussy is so tight for me, my dirty slut," he whispered against the back of your neck, his breath scalding hot.
He began to pound into you with a brutal emphasis. Every stroke was a clapping impact of his pelvis against your ass, the sound echoing loudly in the kitchen. He pulled out until only his tip remained inside your slick walls, then slammed back in, bottoming out against you with a force.
Your hands slid wildly on the smooth kitchen island, unable to find traction as his relentless pace drove you forward with every thrust. Jungkook reached forward, his large hand tangling ruthlessly in your messy hair, pulling your head back so your spine arched painfully, beautifully into him.
"Look at the mirror," he commanded, his voice filled with lust, nodding toward the reflective glass of his studio across the room. "Look at what I'm doing to you."
Through your blurred, tear-filled vision, you saw the silhouette of his body looming over yours, his heavily tattooed right arm flexing as he pinned you down, the contrast of his dark ink against your pale, flushed skin. He thrusted harder, his cock rubbing against your internal sweet spot with every shallow strike until your brain short-circuited.
Before you could reach the precipice of an orgasm, Jungkook pulled out with a wet sound. You gasped at the emptiness, your body shivering from the loss of heat, but he wasn't done.
He grabbed your arm, dragging you off the counter and pulling you backward into his adjoining tattoo studio. The room was illuminated by the glow of his lights. He shoved you back against the floor-to-ceiling mirror that lined the wall, the cold glass sending a shockwave through your overheating skin.
Jungkook dropped to his knees before you.
Your breath caught as his hands clamped around your thighs, forcing them wide apart. He buried his face straight into your dripping core, lapping up your wetness with an aggression that made your head toss back against the glass. He sucked your swollen clit into his mouth, his licking at the sensitive nub until you were screaming his name, your fingers clawing at his dark hair to pull him away before you lost your mind.
"Jungkook, please—no more, I can't—"
He ignored your pleas. He rose to his feet, his lips slick with your wetness. He looked completely unhinged, like someone else had taken over him. He grabbed your right leg, hoisting it up and draping your knee over his broad shoulder, opening you up completely.
He aligned himself and drove back inside you, using the wall to pin you completely.
This position allowed him to go even deeper. Every thrust was a severe plunge that filled you to the absolute brim. The cold glass of the mirror rattled behind your back with every slam of his hips. Jungkook’s hand locked around your throat again, his thumb pressing hard against your pulse point, just barely cutting off your air.
"You think you can look down on me?" he panted, his face inches from yours. "You think because you're stuck-up and perfect I wouldn't do this to you? You're mine, Y/N. Every single part of you."
"Yes—fuck, yes—Jungkook—"
The friction was blinding. You began to squeeze around him in uncontrollable spasms. Realizing you were about to come again, Jungkook pulled out at the last second, refusing to let you finish. You let out a frustrated, angry cry, but he grabbed your waist, throwing you onto his low, leather tattoo table.
He crawled over you like a shadow, forcing you onto your back. He grabbed both of your ankles, shoving your knees all the way back to your chest, folding you completely in half. It was a position of vulnerability, leaving you entirely exposed to him. He looked down at you, his chest glistening with sweat, his tattoos shifting dynamically as he braced his weight over you. He lined his tip up with your soaking, convulsing entrance and slammed down with the entire weight of his torso.
The depth was staggering. A loud sob tore from your throat as he filled you, his cock stretching you past your limits.
"Look at me," he growled, his voice a raw, broken rasp.
He began to move in devastating strokes. He wasn't pulling out anymore; he was grinding his pelvis against yours, his thumb slipping against your clit with every drive. You locked your fingers into the leather edges of the table, your head rolling side to side as your entire body vibrated with a white-hot, blinding pleasure.
"Jungkook— please. Please, let me come!”
“Apologize first. Apologize for being a brat to me all these months. Tell me how badly you wanted my cock inside you.” he rasped, slapping your cheek.
Your head snapped to the side, the pain adding more intensity to your pleasure. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry, Jungkook! I wanted your cock so badly,” you cried out, tears cascading down your cheeks
"Good girl. Now come for me," he ordered, his pace getting faster, a sprint toward his orgasm. "Take it, baby. Take my cum."
You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling his lips down to yours as your second orgasm crashed over you with the force of a tsunami. Your walls clamped around him, dragging him over the edge with you.
With a moan, Jungkook delivered more thrusts, before his cum flooded your pussy, filling you to the brim as he pulsed inside you over and over again, his forehead dropping against yours as you both collapsed into the ruined, sweat-soaked darkness of the studio.
The thuds of your hearts were the only sound left in the studio, a stark contrast to the music that usually filled the space. The heat radiating between your bodies was prominent as the initial shock of the orgasm began to leave. Jungkook remained above you for several long minutes, his forehead still pressed against yours, his breathing a ragged, trembling rattle that gradually slowed down.
When he finally shifted, pulling out of you with a soft, wet sound, a cold shiver immediately raced across your skin. You let out a small, involuntary whimper at the loss of warmth, your overstimulated muscles twitching.
Jungkook didn't say a word. The intensity that had consumed him moments ago seemed to evaporate, replaced by a stillness. He slid off the leather tattoo table, his bare feet hitting the floor with a soft thud. Through the dim light, you watched his silhouette move across the room. He looked entirely different now; the sharp edges of his posture had softened.
You heard the rustle of fabric, followed by the sound of running water from the small sink in the corner of his studio. You lay there, completely paralyzed by pleasure and exhaustion, your legs still trembling slightly against the leather surface. The reality of what had just happened began to settle into the marrow of your bones, leaving you feeling entirely exposed.
When Jungkook returned, he was holding a dark towel soaked in warm water. He knelt down beside the low table, his dark eyes fixed entirely on your face, searching your expression with an intensity that made your breath hitch. There was no smirk on his face. The arrogant, untouchable exterior he wore like armour was entirely gone.
"Hey," he whispered, his voice incredibly hoarse, "Let me clean you up."
Before you could even think to protest or hide yourself, he gently caught your ankles, straightening your legs out with a soft touch. He began to wipe away the sweat and the messy aftermath of his cum from your inner thighs. His hands, the same ones that had pinned you down, were now incredibly careful, moving with a light precision as if he were afraid you might break under his touch.
Every stroke of the warm towel sent a completely different kind of shiver through your body. It wasn't the white-hot spike of lust, but a deep, aching warmth that made your chest tighten.
"Does it hurt?" he asked quietly, his eyes flicking up to meet yours. His thumb brushed against the soft skin of your hip, right over the faint red marks where his grip had been bruisingly tight. "I went too hard."
"I'm fine," you breathed out, your voice small and raspy from all the moaning you had done. "I'm not glass, Jungkook."
A small, genuine breath of a laugh escaped his lips, though it looked more like a sigh of relief. He finished cleaning you, tossing the towel aside onto a nearby stool. Instead of stepping away, he reached down, sliding his arms beneath your back and knees, and lifted you effortlessly into his chest.
You instinctively wrapped your arms around his neck, burying your face into the crook of his collarbone. He smelled like sweat, but you secretly didn't mind. He carried you out of the studio, walking past the cold kitchen island where the war had officially begun, and carried you into his bedroom.
His bedroom was a surprise. Given his chaotic lifestyle, you had expected a disaster zone of discarded clothes and empty takeout containers. Instead, it was tidy, dominated by a massive bed covered in charcoal-grey silk sheets. The only light came from a lamp on the nightstand, casting a warm, golden glow across the room.
He laid you down onto the mattress with immense care, immediately pulling the duvet over your exposed, shivering skin. You curled into the bed, your eyes tracking him as he walked over to his dresser. He pulled out an oversized, faded black cotton t-shirt and returned to the bedside.
"Here," he murmured, pulling the blanket back just enough to help you slide your arms through the sleeves. The fabric was massive on you, hanging past your thighs and swallowing your frame, completely soaked with his scent.
Jungkook disappeared into his bathroom for a brief moment, returning after a quick second. He was wearing nothing but a loose pair of soft sweatpants, his dark hair damp and messy against his forehead. He didn't look like the menacing guy from apartment 4B anymore; he looked completely human, stripped of the bravado and the spite that had defined your entire relationship.
He slid into the bed beside you, the mattress dipping under his weight. For a moment, a lingering tension hung in the air. You were both so used to fighting, so used to using words as weapons across the threshold of your doors, that the quiet intimacy of a shared bed felt foreign and dangerous.
You lay on your side, staring at him. He laid on his back, staring up at the ceiling, his jaw working as if he were trying to swallow a mountain of unspoken words.
"Y/N," he started, his voice cracking slightly in the quiet room. He turned his head to look at you, his dark eyes wide and completely unmasked under the amber light. "I need to say something."
You didn't interrupt. You just pulled the blanket higher up on your chin, watching him.
"I'm sorry," he said, the words coming out in a rush. He reached out under the covers, his large hand finding yours and wrapping his fingers securely around your smaller ones. "I'm sorry for the things I said, and everything else I've done. I was... I was entirely out of my mind."
He let out a long, ragged breath, his grip on your hand tightening.
"I've been losing my mind since the day I met you," Jungkook confessed, his gaze dropping to your intertwined fingers before rising back to your eyes. "You thought I was trying to annoy you with the music and the girls, and at first, I was just being a complete asshole. But after that first night you knocked on my door, when you were standing there looking so furious and so completely out of my league, everything changed. I didn't know how to get your attention.”
A soft smile touched his lips, though his eyes remained entirely serious. "I just wanted an excuse to see you come back to my door and yell at me again. Because any attention from you was better than you looking right through me."
Your heart did a violent flip in your chest. The honesty of his words was breaking down every defence mechanism you had spent months building.
"You called me a brat," you whispered softly, your voice completely devoid of the old malice. "You told me I was stuck-up."
"Because you’re so perfect, and it terrified me," Jungkook replied instantly, leaning closer until his face was only inches from yours on the pillow. "You have your life together. You have the career, the structure. I convinced myself that you looked down on me because it was easier than admitting that I was completely beneath you."
He reached his free hand out from beneath the covers, his fingertips gently brushing against your cheek, tracing the line of your jaw with a tenderness that made your eyes prickle with tears.
"But I don't want to fight with you anymore, Princess," he murmured, his voice dropping into a soft, vulnerable register that felt like a direct caress to your soul. "I don't want to hear you through a wall anymore. I love you. I think I’ve loved you since the second you told me to shut the hell up months ago."
The confession hung in the quiet space between you, heavy and beautiful. You stared at him, taking in the softness of his eyes, the absolute sincerity in his features, and the slight tremor in his hand as it rested against your face. He was completely exposed, giving you all the power to crush him if you wanted to.
But you didn't want to.
"I'm sorry too," you whispered, a small, tearful laugh escaping your lips as you moved your head to press your cheek firmly into his palm. "I was stuck-up. I looked down on your world because I was jealous of how free you were. I spent so much time hiding behind my schedules and work because admitting that I wanted something would mean admitting that I didn't have everything under control."
You reached up, your fingers tangling into the damp strands of his dark hair, pulling him just a fraction closer.
"I don't hate anything about you,” you confessed softly. "I love you too. I’ve been entirely miserable without you."
The relief that washed over Jungkook’s face was instantaneous and breathtaking. A massive, brilliant smile broke across his face, the boyish, dazzling smile he usually hid behind his arrogant smirks. He let out a joyous sigh , immediately throwing himself at you, covering your body with his.
"Say it again," he demanded, his voice thick with happiness as he buried his face into your neck, peppering your skin with soft, fluttering kisses.
"I love you, you idiot," you laughed, your hands gripping his shoulders as he rolled over, pulling you with him until you were lying flush against his chest, your heads resting on the same pillow.
"Good. Because you're stuck with me now," he muttered against your lips, before pulling you into a kiss. It was sweet, and incredibly deep, a gentle sealing of a contract you had both been waiting to sign for months.
When he finally pulled away, he wrapped his massive arms securely around your waist, pulling your back flush against his chest in a tight, protective cocoon. His long legs tangled with yours under the silk sheets, his chin resting comfortably on the top of your head.
"The wall has to go," Jungkook murmured sleepily into your hair, his large hand gently stroking your stomach over the cotton of his t-shirt. "First thing Monday morning. I'm calling a contractor to knock the drywall down between 4A and 4B."
"We'll get evicted, Jungkook," you mumbled back, a soft, exhausted smile spreading across your face as your sleep deprivation finally caught up to you.
"Let them evict us," he whispered, his breathing slowing down as he fell into a deep, peaceful sleep, his heart beating a steady, reassuring rhythm against your shoulder blades. "We'll just buy the whole damn building."
The wall didn’t come down on Monday morning, mostly because the building management threatened legal action at the mere mention of a sledgehammer, but the physical barrier between apartment 4A and 4B was entirely gone anyway.
Within a week, the deadbolt on your front door remained permanently unlocked. Within three, your living room began to acquire a few distinct artifacts, such as a stray sketch pad filled with intricate charcoal drawings of you resting on your glass coffee table, a pair of combat boots left neatly by your shoe rack, and a continuous, subtle scent of raw tobacco and expensive leather that no longer felt like an invasion, but more like a safety net.
On a hazy evening in July, the heat outside was horrible, but inside apartment 4A, the air conditioning was humming a quiet tune. You were sitting cross-legged on your sofa, a laptop resting on your thighs as you meticulously reviewed the upcoming budget projections. Your glasses were pushed up onto the bridge of your nose, your focus entirely ironclad.
Or, at least, it was supposed to be.
From the other side of the apartment, the door clicked open. You didn't even look up, your fingers continuing to fly across the keyboard, but your heart rate gave a familiar, stupid little skip.
A moment later, Jungkook stepped into your living room. He had just finished an eight-hour tattooing session, and he looked beautifully, completely wrecked. He had shed his shirt, wearing only a loose, sleeveless white tank top that exposed the sprawling canvas of his right arm and the blackwork wrapping around his ribs.
He didn't say a word. He didn't need to. He walked straight toward the couch, his heavy footsteps silent on your plush rug, and dropped his massive frame directly behind you.
"Jungkook, I’m working," you murmured in a breathless, soft tone.
"Don't care," he grumbled, his voice a gravelly vibration that resonated right through your spine.
His large, tattooed arms wrapped tightly around your waist, pulling you backward until your spine was pressed flush against his warm, solid torso. He buried his face into the crook of your neck, his nose nuzzling against your pulse point, inhaling deeply. His breath was hot against your skin, sending a delicate flush up your throat.
"You smell like vanilla," he muttered, his lips brushing against your collarbone as he spoke. "It's driving me crazy."
"It's just perfume, you dramatic idiot," you laughed softly, tilting your head to the side to give him better access, your fingers finally halting over the laptop keys. "And I really need to finish this report. My boss is—"
"Your boss can wait," Jungkook interrupted, his hand moving beneath the hem of your oversized sweatshirt, his palm resting against the bare skin of your stomach. His thumb traced slow, soothing circles over your skin, his touch so incredibly gentle it made your chest ache. "You’ve been staring at that screen for hours. Let me take care of you."
You let out a long, defeated sigh, closing the laptop and setting it aside on the cushion. The moment the screen went dark, you turned around in his embrace, shifting until you were sitting face-to-face in his lap, your knees framing his hips.
Jungkook’s eyes instantly locked onto yours, the light from your lamp reflecting in his pupils. The lazy, arrogant smirk he used to wear like armor was completely gone, replaced by an expression of pure, unadulterated adoration that still made you feel entirely exposed. He reached up, his thumb gently pushing your reading glasses down the bridge of your nose before sliding them off entirely, setting them on the sofa arm.
"There you are," he whispered, his rough fingers cupping your jawline, his thumb smoothing over your cheekbone. "I missed you today."
"I was right next door," you pointed out, a small smile tugging at your lips as you reached up to tangle your fingers in the soft, damp strands of his hair. "I could literally hear your tattoo machine vibrating through the drywall at 2 PM."
"Yeah, well, hearing you through a wall isn't the same as holding you," he murmured, his gaze dropping to your lips. "I kept thinking about how much I wanted to walk out of the apartment, and drag you into my bed. I’m completely ruined, Y/N. You've completely ruined me."
"Good," you whispered, leaning in until your lips were a mere breath away from his. "You deserve it for making my life a living hell for months."
Jungkook let out a low, breathless chuckle against your mouth before he closed the distance. The kiss was filled with a domestic warmth that belonged entirely to the two of you. There was no rush, no desperate battle for dominance, just the steady pull of two people. His hands slid down to your lower back, pressing you closer until there was no space left between you, his heart beating a strong, steady rhythm against your chest.
When he finally pulled back, his forehead rested against yours, his breathing a little shallow.
"I bought dinner," he murmured, his eyes still closed as his thumbs traced the line of your jaw. "That little noodle place you like down the street. It’s sitting on my kitchen counter."
"You remembered?" you teased, shifting your weight slightly in his lap.
"I remember everything about you," he corrected softly, opening his eyes to look at you with a terrifying amount of certainty. "I know you take your coffee with too much milk, I know you organize your closet by colour, and I know that when you're stressed, you bite the inside of your lip until it bleeds. I'm paying attention, baby. I'm always paying attention."
His words made your throat tight, warmth expanding in your chest. You wrapped your arms tightly around his neck, burying your face into his shoulder, holding onto him as if he were the only solid thing left in the universe.
"Come on," Jungkook whispered, shifting under you as he easily hoisted your body into his arms, keeping you tucked securely against his chest as he stood up from the sofa. "Let's go eat. And then I’m dragging you to bed, and you're going to let me sleep for twelve hours straight."
"Only if you promise not to play music at 3 AM," you mumbled into his neck as he carried you across the threshold into his apartment.
Jungkook kicked his front door shut behind him, the click of the lock echoing in the quiet hallway. He looked down at you, his bunny teeth showing as he smiled.
"Deal, Princess," he murmured, kissing your temple softly. "From now on, the only noise in this apartment is going to be you."
whoever told you coparenting was hard was a fucking loser.
a concept you truly couldn’t bring yourself to understand in any capacity, considering your coparenting situation was one most dreamt about.
you know you were probably privileged considering the horror stories you’d heard online that felt more like a nightmare than actual reality - you’d never experienced any screaming matches over custody, no passive aggressive texts sent at heinous hours of the night, no awkward handovers that made you uncomfortable. you had your ex husband wrapped around your little finger; a fact both you and he relished in openly.
in fact, your initial divorce from jeon jungkook had only confused people. despite the signed papers between you symbolising an end of the relationship over two years ago, nothing about your dynamic functioned as though you were exes.
you were both polar opposites, two people that came from a different walk of life and so it was a well known fact that neither of you would last as a married couple, and yet here you were, orbiting one another as though the prospect of otherwise was too foreign to entertain.
the best way to describe jungkook was manly. he embodied the very meaning of it - half mechanic, other half beast with rough edges and broad hands, grease permanently smeared on his skin. his large frame was covered in tattoos, beefy arms flexing as he’d work whilst his dark hair would constantly fall into his eyes because he’d forget to go to the barber until you all but forced him to go.
he owned his own mechanics company, the biggest in the city, which meant he worked like a dog but he earned good enough money to spoil you rotten. nothing had really changed after the divorce other than a formal understanding. he paid for your entire lifestyle, making sure you used his card for the groceries, the upkeep of your once shared home, your stupid skincare orders and of course, your sweet children.
jungkook’s only rule pending the divorce was made incredibly clear to you. he was the sole provider. him and only him.
you genuinely wondered whether his personal nightmare consisted of you working a shift with the way he’d get angry at you spending your own money, queuing another heavy argument that had you all but icing him out for a full day. enough to have him kissing down your neck in apology, all whilst groping your ass the way you secretly loved.
truthfully, he had never known how not to provide for you.
it lived somewhere deep inside of him, carved into his very being and instinct, so much so he thought it defined him as a man. once you had birthed your twin children, it was like something had switched in his brain to amplify it all that much harder. despite no longer being his wife, he supported you and the children, telling you it was the one thing he wouldn’t let you fight him on.
you were a princess to the core. manicured nails, weekly blowouts and a shopping addiction that only spurred jungkook on to work harder - you were his polar opposite, never having worked too hard a day in your life and he wanted to keep it that way. even your children were a gift from above, so well behaved and sweet that you had never struggled with them, loving nothing more than to pamper and shower them with all of your love.
you were an odd family unit, even you could recognise that, with your coparenting dynamic meaning he had unrestricted access to your home. he was over multiple times a week after work, always using the excuse of wanting to see the kids which of course was half true, but really, any access to you was worth making the journey over. you kept his stomach full and his annoyance high, just how he liked it.
no matter how well you were together, being married just didn’t work. he worked too hard, you pushed too much - you both wanted things from the other that seemed impossible, leaving you in limbo where all you’d do is argue. it would always end with him inside of you, but sex could only fix so much. somehow, not being together had only strengthened the tension between you as you made it your life mission to keep him on his toes, and he made sure you’d feel his presence no matter what.
in theory, you were perfect for each other.
because the thing about jeon jungkook is he liked his woman difficult.
liked when you bitched at him with glossy lips and french tips all curled onto your hips, scoffing at whatever he was telling you before taking his card to online shop. it was even better when you’d stomp around the house in your flimsy little pyjamas, pretending to be annoyed at him over stupid things he knew had no merit - it had him hardening beyond words.
you were his little minx, and he fucking loved it.
—
“mamma, daddy said i could stay up until nine today.” your son, minjae, giggled from his seat beside his sister on the couch, their favourite show playing on the screen.
“daddy’s stupid, baby. we don’t listen to him.” you cooed back as you handed them their snacks, the sound of your kids giggling enough to put a grin on your face.
“heard that.”
the deep voice came before you actually saw him, followed by the sound of heavy work boots by the door of your home. within seconds, you watched as he appeared by the doorway, in all of his obnoxiously masculine glory.
jeon jungkook practically swallowed your doorway whole as he stepped into the living room. broad shoulders were the first thing you saw as they stretched the material of his work t-shirt, his brand logo clear on his chest, the navy a fitting contrast to his tanned skin. his hair was messy, pulled back from his face, faint traces of grease still staining his forearms where he had scrubbed clean just minutes ago.
he was just so big. big hands, big biceps, big thighs - his muscles were something that you could never really get over, something he was very much privy to. he was the sort of man who reached for things on the top of the shelf without thinking, carrying both children with such ease that it had you malfunctioning in real time. his voice was low, gruff. the type that had people listening as though he was a natural leader.
a beast of a man.
“daddy!” minji, your little girl, squealed as she carefully placed her plate next to her before scurrying away to launch herself at him.
jungkook’s entire face softened, letting out a soft laugh as he picked her up, all whilst minjae copied his older sister, instead cupping his legs, much shyer than his overexcited sibling.
he cooed at them, his voice dropping low whilst he ruffled his hair affectionately. your children absolutely adored him, both sweet little things that glowed whenever their dad would appear.
you could never get over how good of a father he was, and despite your relationship not always being the best, he prioritised your children the way you wanted. even the way he provided for you, as the mother of his children, was beyond generous and underneath the bitchy attitude, you were grateful tenfold. he treated you three like you were a natural extension of him.
but unfortunately for him, you were simply unable to let him live in peace.
“you’re late.” you murmured casually from the couch, going back to filing your nails.
jungkook’s eyes lifted to yours. narrowing. he lingered, looking you up and down openly, hungrily, as though the prospect of you getting on his nerves whilst looking the way you did was straight out of a fantasy.
“traffic.”
“mm.”
“what’s that supposed to mean?” he scoffed a little.
“nothing.” you hummed again, all too casual, but he could see what you were doing.
that didn’t stop him falling victim to it.
“been here three seconds and you’re already being bitchy.”
you gasped dramatically, pointing your nail file in his direction as it became your turn to narrow your eyes into slits. “watch your mouth in front of the children!”
“but mamma, you called daddy stupid.” minjae, your sweet angel inquired with a tone of genuine confusion, the two words falling into the same category in his mind.
jungkook watched as you cooed at him, getting up from your seat to plant a big kiss to his cheek, before reciprocating it with his sister too who giggled.
“that’s because your daddy is stupid, my love.”
he scoffed again at you with a shake of his head, muttering something under his breath that earned him a hefty glare from yourself. he put minji down finally, his hand still on minjae’s head affectionately only for the pair to grab at his hands in a shared babble, leading him over to the couch to show him the cartoon they had just been watching out of excitement.
and despite being exhausted, jungkook was utterly weak at the knees for his kids, and thus, followed along immediately.
you watched him, having moved to the kitchen where you got a clear view of them from your position near the doorway. his big body sunk into the couch whilst minjae shuffled closer, settling into his father’s side. the entire vision was enough to tug at your heart as you fought down your cuteness aggression - especially with the way he just looked too large for the area he was sat in, with all the cushions surrounding him, his two kids. he looked silly.
particularly with the way minji was now climbing all over him whilst explaining the plot with deadly seriousness.
“and then she lost her crown.” she informed him sadly.
“shit,” jungkook remarked with raised eyebrows. “that’s bad.”
“daddy!”
“sorry. shoot.”
you rolled your eyes as he looked up, meeting your gaze momentarily with a sheepish grin, before you looked away, settling over the stove once more.
it happened every time.
you’d spend all day mentally preparing yourself to be annoyed at him only for jungkook to walk in through the door and utterly transform. he became so soft, so gentle when it came to your pair and it was a constant reminder that the one good thing that came out of this situation was you had picked the perfect father.
he’d listen to them properly - never offering them a half assed version of himself, especially since you had both come from such broken homes. always listening properly, no distractions, despite the fact he would work gruelling shifts that had him using his body for hours on hours. even now, he’d always have his hand rubbing up and down minjae’s back as his sister yapped and yapped, knowing he was the quieter one of the two and therefore the shyer one.
your chest squeezed at the thought.
“you feedin’ me tonight, or what?”
you swore if you rolled your eyes any more that night, they’d pop out of your skull.
“you’re so romantic.”
“been thinking about your food all day.” he grunted, walking into the kitchen properly to allow the kids their time on the tv, and of course, his time to terrorise their mother.
“that’s because you eat like an animal.”
“worked twelve hours today.”
“who’s fault is that?”
he couldn’t help the smirk on his face. he loved you bratty. “yours. you’re milking me dry.”
you narrowed your eyes, stirring his food in the pot, though you’d never admit you cooked solely for him and his taste, despite it being more than clear. behind you, you could hear the soft sounds of the familiar cartoon playing mixed with the twins’ occasional giggle, though it wasn’t long until the heavy sound of jungkook’s footsteps became louder and louder, souring your mood.
of course. the man couldn’t survive without being near you when given the option.
“you’re extra bratty tonight.” he observed casually, leaning against one of the counters, though his voice was twinged in exhaustion.
“you’re projecting.” you hummed back.
“am not.
“are too.”
“you text me a thumbs up earlier.”
“and?”
jungkook scoffed before coming to the counter closest to you, leaning, despite your refusal to look at him.
“you know i hate that fucking shit.”
instead, you chose to feign ignorance, going so far as to prettily turn your back to him with a flick of your hair. you couldn’t help but wind him up, it was genuinely your favourite thing to do considering his reactions were always just so worth it. a man you knew could ruin you in seconds holding back because he knew he truly didn’t have access to you anymore, and until you gave him the green light needed, he was stuck in limbo.
lord knew whenever you gave him a faraway nod, he’d have you up on the counters and in between your thighs in seconds, always telling you it was the only way he felt satisfied anymore despite not being touched.
your hand reached upwards to grab a plate from the cabinet above your head. before you could even touch it, your feet on their tip toes, a large arm reached over your head instantly.
his chest brushed your back in the process in a way that felt accidental at first, but immediately, you found yourself pressed almost harshly into the stove, his front pushing your back against him cheekily.
fucking ridiculous.
jungkook grabbed the plate effortlessly, barely having to raise his hand whatsoever. instead of handing it to you immediately, he merely pressed against you further, your eyes widening just a fraction as you felt every inch of him behind you, warmth bleeding through the very thin material of your tiny pyjama top.
he was always so warm after work, it made your head spin.
“could’ve got it myself.” you murmured under your breath, cheeks hot.
“yeah?” he dipped his head down, lips grazing your ear. “looked like you were struggling.”
you hated how much you loved it - how big he was compared to you, how he towered over you. jungkook made you feel tiny in a way that genuinely fucked with your head, all broad muscle and rough hands, and sheer overwhelming man. even now, one of his thighs nudged between yours absentmindedly as he reached around you to place the plate down for you.
“you’re in my space.” you shifted, pretending like you weren’t enjoying it.
he could read you like an open book.
“your space?” he let out a small laugh.
you wanted to push him away, annoyed at his amusement at your words and even more annoyed at the way he so casually touched you, especially considering he knew what it did to you. it made you weak everywhere, to the point where you were utter putty in the palm of his hands and he relished in the feeling - the woman he obsessed over equally as ruined by something he did without thought.
you opened your mouth to speak only to feel his too large hand suddenly slide over to your stomach, digits digging into your skin before yanking you back into him. you were no longer pushed against the stove, now completely entirely into him, meaning you could feel every inch, including the harsh bulge that had begun to form just by speaking to you.
a squeak nearly left you before your eyes fell into slits, huffing as you smacked his hand meanly. fucking brute.
“jungkook!” you immediately snapped at him, but it did nothing to deter him as his fingers spread wide, practically covering every inch of the skin on your stomach all whilst he held you to him like he had every right.
“stop moving.” he muttered against your ear.
“ugh, you’re such a brute!”
“hard to do that when you’re walking around our house looking like this.”
your mouth fell open.
“our house?” you hissed, though he couldn’t help but realise the way your shoulders had dropped a little, almost at ease at his words despite your words. “i divorced you, this is my home.”
“stupid divorce.” he huffed a little under his breath, face dropping into your neck as he breathed in your scent. “worst fucking decision of my life.”
the words came out flat - immediate, as though they were plain fact. it constantly knocked you of breath whenever he talked like that, knowing that deep down you agreed too, that despite the problems between you, the divorce was also a big regret of your own. perhaps that was why neither of you acted like it had actually happened, simply playing house as though you were still together.
“you wear these shorts on purpose?”
you hummed at him then, looking over your shoulder at him just as he pulled away from your neck, your eyes connecting. “they’re just pyjamas.”
his hand, however, slid over to your hip with a grunt, squeezing.
“you’re killing me walking around like this.”
you rolled your eyes so hard, your head hurt. “just had a twelve hour shift and it’s my shorts that are killing you?”
“yeah,” jungkook replied instantly, with no hesitation whatsoever, eyeing you almost meanly. “you know what you’re doing. cut the innocent shit.”
you scoffed dramatically despite the heat travelling up and down your body. “you’re so embarrassing!”
“you’re a fucking minx.”
his teeth grazed the curve where your shoulder met your neck before he bit down, teeth sinking into your skin just enough to have you jolting. immediately, you smacked him on his arm with a hiss despite the utter mess between your legs, your brain growing hazier by the second.
“ow! you dog!”
“keep being mouthy,” he muttered against your skin, gently sucking on the area he bit, planting heavy kisses before dragging his lips to your ear once more. “watch what happens.”
the threat settled low in your stomach.
you could feel it everywhere, deep between your thighs and in the thump of your heart, all whilst your mind malfunctioned in real time. jungkook watched you slump against him, knowing how badly you were affected when he spoke like that. vulgar. nasty. all heavy hands and filthy promises he’d whisper into your skin like they belonged there. you couldn’t help how your body reacted to him, not when he was the only living thing that knew exactly which buttons to press to have you fall on your knees for him, to shut your pretty little mouth up with ease.
you twisted in his hold, finally managing to part from him just enough to actually turn in his hold, trying your best to glare at him despite the hazy look in your eye. he wanted to devour you, head dropping low to properly meet your gaze, feeling his breath against your lips.
“you’re disgusting.” you weakly rebutted at him.
“you like it.” his mouth curled.
he could take you now, right here, and he knew you’d let him - knew you’d open up your pretty little legs for him to give way for all of the things he had wanted. he also knew you weren’t ready for it, and despite the heavy tension between you and the thick want that clouded every conversation, he’d never push until you were the one that initiated.
that was the rules afterall.
you had told him as much, plainly. he could eat you out as much as he wanted, and lord knew he did with absolute glee, but no sex, no kisses. you simply used him to get off, grinding on his hardened cock through his work trousers late in the evening, his hand on your mouth to muffle the loud moans you couldn’t keep inside. he was a mere toy, happy to be at your disposal.
the smug bastard let out a low hum before finally releasing you, his fingers squeezing your stomach one last time to remind you of his hold on you, before grunting lightly, stepping back. you watched him, openly, one hand going down to adjust the growing bulge that had formed whilst he took a seat at the table, just like you had wanted him to at the beginning, still palming himself as he watched you as though it was perfectly normal.
you turned, plating his food despite your warm cheeks, all whilst your ex husband sat there, massaging his cock at the sight of your ass openly. you knew that to anyone else, the dynamic was batshit crazy, but to you? this was all you wanted, all you ever needed - a fucked up lover who managed to match you, none of that sappy shit. you wanted a man, and a man you had gotten indeed.
you turned, placing it in front of him, already turning to walk away before a large arm darted out, grabbing you by the waist and pulling you down onto his lap, against the very bulge that was growing and growing and growing. he knew how messed up you’d get just from grinding on him, and he had every intention of making you cum tonight, multiple times hopefully. the thought thrilled him.
“get off!”
his hand flattened against your back as your legs came up onto the side of him, your core nestled so perfectly against his clothed cock that it pulled a tiny gasp from your throat, a hitch of breath that had him openly bucking his hips into you so you could feel it more prominently. the man was obscene, genuinely obscene and the worst thing was that you were equally as sick, capitalising off of the interaction by grinding right back down on him, as though his food wasn’t there, as though he wasn’t exhausted from the day he’d just had.
“always fucking mouthing off.” he muttered darkly, lips now grazing your jaw in sweet kisses. “then look at you..” another grind, heavier now. enough to have you whimpering a little, the friction of his heavy duty trousers delicious against your barely there shorts. “get so sweet when i put you on my lap like you belong.”
at that, you shut your eyes, unable to rebut or saying more when you knew it was the truth.
no matter how mouthy you were, jungkook always put you in your place the same way each time. a roll of his hips, a thrust of his tongue - you were his girl through and through, no matter what you told him. it was his obligation, his duty, to satisfy you in the ways you’d let him and god did he exploit the fuck out of those decisions.
heat flooded your entire body, just as you spread your legs for him properly, straddling him the way he liked, your head on his shoulder, hands on his chest. you watched him eat, eyeing his adam’s apple half in hunger yourself, only for him. only ever him. he was filth personified, what with his obsessive and controlling tendencies but it was what made you want him so badly - even now, he found himself feeding you from his own plate despite being starved, always putting your comfort in front of his.
all whilst forcing your clothed cunt down on him harder.
you spent the next few minutes like that, in a state of bliss like you hadn’t just spent the last ten minutes being mean to him for no apparently reason, but he loved it, holding you tight to him as he indulged in your needy tendencies. he didn’t care what you did, or how you chose to use him as long as it was him you selected.
you were his fucking girl, and he’d never let you forget it.
—
shopping had easily become one of your favourite hobbies after the divorce.
that wasn’t to say you didn’t indulge prior, but having jungkook’s debit cards in your pink chanel purse post divorce meant you could spend as frivolously as you wanted with full knowledge that he couldn’t complain or you’d revoke all access to yourself. it was pure evil coming from you, that much you could agree, but it wasn’t like you cared to be honest - he wanted to give you his money, who were you not to spend it at dior?
it was his fault, really, considering jungkook had managed to make the separation somehow more beneficial than the actual relationship.
his cards sat so pretty in your bag, begging, yearning to be used by you and you, of course, were never one to deny your soul of what was so easily accessible to you. how could you deny a gift when given with so much love, so freely as though it was what he had intended in the first place.
and so, you found yourself on your weekly shopping spree, humming under your breath. dressed in your cute little skirt, top accentuating your breasts in a way you know would have jungkook passing away if he saw you, all whilst your big heels clicked and clacked on the pavement; you indulged in the strip of shops that had become home to you.
fendi, gucci, louis, hermes, chanel, prada - you knew them all, and oh, how they knew you.
you had already spent an ungodly amount.
a new perfume just because the bottle was pretty, alongside some high end skincare you secretly knew was utter bullshit. two sets of expensive heels that accentuated the length of your legs so deliciously, you’d be a fool not to purchase them. countless dresses and cute little jumpers for your sweet babies too, things you knew that they would love and feel comfortable in all whilst sporting a hefty price tag.
the best thing about all of this? jungkook didn’t give a fuck.
if anything, you were the sure he had something clinically wrong with him considering the way he would ask you what you had purchased, notification after notification plaguing his phone and despite seeing the ridiculous price tags, it never deterred him from making sure he worked hard enough to accommodate you. ex wife or not, you were his to provide for - you just came with a specific price.
you knew he was genuinely crazy when you had bought a whole new wardrobe full of clothes after a horrible day, needing some retail therapy more than anything else, spending an ungodly amount only to see a single text from him in response.
“good girl.”
god, you had nearly moaned.
spending his money seemed to satisfy something deeply primitive in him. the bastard was everything you had ever wanted.
still, despite being an utter bitch to him any chance you got, even you recognised that there were rules and boundaries.
you knew that jungkook would let you buy whatever you wanted, to your hearts content no matter how stupid, but your heart still ached whenever he would come utterly exhausted after a particularly gruelling shift at the shop. being a business owner was one thing, having the largest mechanic shop was another - being the head mechanic, and actually getting your hands dirty each and every waking day from morning till night? that was a whole different ballpark, and you often found yourself returning things secretly, or putting things down whenever you’d get the familiar feeling of guilt.
unfortunately for you, said feeling was no where to be seen when all you could think about was how pretty the pink bag in front of you was.
it was ridiculous, completely and entirely - even you knew that.
the second you saw it, your hands darted out, fingers gently grazing the gold hardware, pink leather soft against your touch all whilst your heart began to beat in that all familiar way. you wanted it. needed it.
oh, how your chest fluttered at pretty things. you had always been this way, no matter the price tag, and jungkook had done nothing but absolutely untrue it throughout your relationship so really, you had no one else to blame but him.
and so you stood, bottom lip jutted out slightly as you tapped your manicured finger against your chin in thought, humming lightly before looking over to the sales assistant. even she knew this was out of your typical budget, which wasn’t to say you couldn’t afford it because with jungkook’s work ethic, you could do whatever you wanted. this was just a large amount, all at once, all on one thing.
with a little huff, you pulled out your phone.
god this was humiliating. never a day in your life had you asked jungkook for permission on anything, especially not when it came to your shopping purchases, but that horrible gnawing feeling all too similar to guilt was already finding home in your stomach. you were simply going to inform him because you were so nice.
you weren’t even sure why you were feeling this way when he had never even uttered the word no in your presence.
your eyes dragged to the price tag one last time before letting out another huff, finding his contact and pressing the ring button all whilst grumbling.
the phone rang.
once.
twice.
three times.
your mouth fell open. nothing.
you immediately called again, now suddenly feeling even more humiliated, and more annoyed with each passing ring. once the second call rang out too, your eye officially began twitching.
you were the love of his life, the mother of his children - the only person he could cum to the thought of and yet here was, not answering your calls? what, did he have a new girl? someone else to keep him company? was that it? spoiling another girl with his bank card so he could get hard?
the deluded thought had you almost shaking as you took your furious fingers over to your messages, texting out immediately.
‘hello?????’
silence.
‘i need you’
silence again - you were starting to feel seriously pissed off. who cared about a job this much?
‘answer your phone, dickhead’
your eye was fully twitching in annoyance at the consistent blue messaging bubbles in front of you, all decorated with a single word at the bottom. delivered.
then, because you knew nothing else other than being a natural nuisance to him, you began spamming.
‘jungkook’
‘jungkook’
‘jungkook’
‘jungkook’
still nothing. the audacity of it all.
you wanted to sit and deflate before the very bag of your dreams, heart half hurting over it not already being in a shopping bag with your name on it and other half straining at the thought of jungkook not providing the attention you so desperately needed from him to live. he always had his phone on him, you thought, mind going into a million different conclusions that each felt as warped as the next.
you couldn’t remember a single instance where he hadn’t answered you - meetings, working, mid shower, mid wank. no matter the inconvenience, he’d be quick to hear your voice even if it was so you could bitch at him because even you knew he was down bad when it came to you. the man could have been elbow deep in an engine and somehow still find a way to have the phone on speaker next to him.
you could physically feel yourself growing more and more irritated the more you demanded for his attention, all whilst each message sat unread, until you let out a small whine. you had never done this before - never begged for him to look at you, focus on you and now? you’d be lying if you said you didn’t feel a horrible twinge of anxiety in your stomach at the thought of you dropping in his priorities.
he was your jungkook, afterall.
in that hazy train of thought, you put your phone away, turning sharply on your heel and towards the door, making your way outside with your multiple bags on your arms. the shop was only a few streets away, and you were quick on your feet. you wouldn’t usually walk so much in these heels, but these were trying times and you didn’t have a moment to waste.
it wasn’t even about the bag anymore. it was the principle.
at least, that was what you kept telling yourself.
-
the horrible mixture of irritation, brattiness and insecurity swirled deep inside your chest as you practically marched over to the mechanics shop, your hair bouncing with each step all whilst your insane heels clicked loudly. your multiple shopping bags were beginning to hurt your arms, another thing you were sure to take out on jungkook despite the fact it was a self inflicted problem.
your shoes, ones you never really had a problem with, were beginning to dig into your feet and you were sure it was because you were already annoyed. they had long stopped looking cute and started feeling devilish, but unfortunately for you, your pride well outweighed the hassle of it all.
you marched right inside, only to be hit with the all too familiar smell of oil and metal. it lived permanently in the walls and into your ex husband’s clothing, and no matter how much you denied it, it felt like home - comforting beyond means, so much so that you found yourself craving to be wrapped in it whenever you would see him.
the large workshop was busy despite the afternoon dragging on with engines high in the air, toolboxes scattered on each section, concrete floors muddied and dirtied whilst you could hear someone on the far end of the room call out about a missing wrench. again, it felt like home.
a few heads lifted immediately upon your arrival, with all six raising as you stepped forward a little. the move instantly changed, as all of them greeted you warmly, some waving, sweet jin even going so far as to take the bags off of your arms and put them in jungkook’s office.
you knew them all personally, of course. you had been here for years, when your ex had first opened the shop, hiring all of them. you had brought lunches, been pregnant with your babies here, waddling around whilst they all debated baby names with you. a family dynamic that resulted in there being no sense of awkwardness whatsoever, despite the divorce.
your gaze swept around the garage, looking, searching, finally finding him.
your breath caught. annoyingly.
because, unfortunately for you, no matter how many years had passed between you, no matter how many arguments where you’d poke and prod, and certainly no matter how many times you pushed him to brink of genuine desperation; the sight of him was always enough to have butterflies erupt in your stomach as though it was the first time.
your heart skipped a beat as you watched him, lowered over an engine with a tool in hand, grease and something dark smeared on his hands all whilst his work t-shirt stretched around his torso unfairly. his biceps were bulging, your kryptonite, all whilst he seemed completely focused on what he was doing.
it wasn’t until he could hear everyone greeting you that had him looking to the side, where you stood, giving you full access to his face. the same dark substance was smeared slightly on his jaw, his dark hair pushed out of his face all whilst his tatted frame turned to fully face you.
if you thought you had been undone by a mere look at you, it was jungkook who felt his entire life stop.
you, his minx of a girl, dressed in a skirt too tiny for his liking with a cute matching top, one that pushed your breast up, giving him the perfect view despite the distance between you. the way your hair sat, your lips plump with lip gloss he longed to kiss off of you, and your high heels that still couldn’t match his height.
he was assessing you hungrily, a darkened look on his face as he admired you head to toe over and over, openly for everyone to see. he had no shame, he didn’t give a fuck when it came to you - you might have divorced him but you were every inch his wife and you knew it too.
you recognised that look, and with each heavy step towards you, it simply expanded to every one of his limbs. he was a man starved, hungry for one thing in his life and that was you. he still looked at you like it was the first time seeing you, even after all these years.
his jaw was harsh, tightened, as though your presence here had fucked him.
good, you thought bitterly, still annoyed. you wanted him to suffer.
he grabbed a rag on his way to you, cleaning his hands of clinging grease before shoving the cloth over his shoulder. once he was in front of you, you readied yourself, lips parting to no doubt spit some venom at him over your own insecurities but he offered no time. instead, jungkook grabbed you by your waist and pushed you firmly in the direction of his office, no words exchanged.
“jungkook!” you hissed, turning a little as your body was all but forced to walk in a direction, the click of your heels heavy on the dirty workfloor.
he didn’t respond, eyes meeting yours in heavy warning, a reminder that this was his workplace, where he was a working professional, where his rules reigned first and foremost. you hated how badly the thought swirled in your stomach, coaxing you out of your negative thoughts and straight back where you felt most at home.
once you were in his office, he turned to close the door. with a single flick of his finger, the lock turned, confining you into the space, all whilst you narrowed your eyes at him. with a small huff, you turned around, flicking your hair at him before walking over to his large seat behind his mahogany desk, sitting down on it as though it belonged to you.
it was laughable, really, how easily you managed to rile him up. just the sight of you, bare legs crossed and high heeled feet - he wanted to fucking ruin you just to remind you that you were all his.
“you should clean up.” you huffed once more, fingers pushing the stacks of contracts away from your space, annoyingly mixing up important papers.
he simply stood in front of the door, before walking over to the desk, resting on the corner of it, eyes meeting yours. he didn’t bother even looking at what you were doing, despite it no doubt causing him problems in the future - he couldn’t keep his eyes off of you.
“you walked here.”
it wasn’t a question. a loaded statement no doubt used to coax you into revealing your full emotions.
your eye twitched. “i have legs.”
“your heels are new.”
“and?”
his lips quirked up slightly. “they’re hurting your feet.”
“no they aren’t.” you snapped back, despite your toes hurting slightly.
his eyebrows lifted. you were such a liar, dressed in sin. he wanted to kiss you.
jungkook pushed off of the desk, walking past the pile of bags that jin had placed in the office for you no longer than a few minutes ago, his eyes still trained on you as he refused to look away. your own eyes faltered, dropping onto the bags momentarily as that familiar feeling of guilt wrapped around your stomach before it returned to his gaze, insecurity wrapped in anger only coming back harder.
he looked like he was approaching a skittish animal, as though he was trained to deal with you entirely. unfortunately for him, you had claws.
“don’t.” you hissed.
“don’t what?”
“do that.”
“do what?” he was fighting a dimpled grin.
you grit your teeth. you extended your hand, finger pointing at him harshly, accusatively, all whilst he walked over to you, until your digit was actually pressing into him. your nail dug into his stomach, not by your own doing, but his as he pushed his skin harsher against you, the sting a healthy reminder of how much he yearned for your touch.
“real scary, baby.”
you nearly shuddered, his voice heavy and loaded.
“i’m serious.”
“yeah, i know.”
you hated when his voice did that, low and certain all whilst his eyelids drooped just from looking at you. you retracted your finger, only for his own hand to dart out and grab a hold of your own until it was pressed against his stomach completely flat.
“you ignored me.” you murmured in annoyance, all whilst you let him manoeuvre you. “did i?”
“mhm.”
he nodded, half condescending and other half fucking enamoured by you. “and that’s why you’re here?”
“don’t act stupid.”
your hissing had his eyes narrowing.
“careful.”
the single word landed heavy, your mouth snapping shut. if anyone was to ask you your favourite quality about jungkook, it would always be the sheer dominance he radiated without even trying - all man, half assertion and other half brute, he plagued your every thought and yet it still never felt enough.
his grip on your hand harshened, as though he needed to feel you on him in a way that hurt, with fingers digging into his skin through his t-shirt. you gulped a little at the feel of his warmth.
“walked into my garage wearing this shit, your feet hurting, and you’re not gonna tell me what’s got you so bratty?” he muttered down at you, voice low.
your eyebrows pulled at his choice of words, peering down at your outfit. this was the exact clothing choice that had you guys arguing so often, what with your breasts accentuated and your ass barely hidden by the cute skirt - you couldn’t help the fact that you liked things on the shorter and tighter side, especially when they’d rile him up so bad.
“you ignored me.” you repeated, with a frown imbedded into your skin.
“never ignored you a day in my fucking life. what you talking about?” he scoffed a little down at you, all whilst your head had to tilt just to look at him from your seated position.
“called you twice, jungkook, and i text you.” it was your turn now to push your finger into him willingly. “you ignored me, so don’t pretend like you didn’t. i’m not an idiot.”
“i was under a car.”
“you always answer.” you rebutted.
his eyes narrowed. there really wasn’t any winning with you, he knew that better than most, but he also wasn’t an idiot. you wouldn’t have marched here for no reason, especially over a missed call or two whilst he was at work considering he never really had his phone on him. he had a receptionist out front, practically hired for the sole reason of being able to inform him whenever you needed him. you knew that, so why was this so upsetting to you now?
“don’t look at me like that.” you huffed.
neither of you mentioned the way his hand on top of yours began to caress your skin, intertwining your fingers as he continued to press further into himself.
“not looking at you like anything.”
“yeah you are, like i’m being stupid.”
he cursed under his breath as he took his other hand and rubbed it up and down his face, as though this was the cherry on top of a long and stressful day. you could feel your blood pressure rising in annoyance at the thought - he had no right to be annoyed with you, not when you were too busy being annoyed at him. how dare he?
“y/n.” he warned lightly. “this shit is pissing me off. you ignore me every chance you get, so why the fuck are you so upset?”
you felt your cheeks begin to heat, half in embarrassment and other in deeper annoyance at being called out. was it your fault that you rolled your eyes whenever he text you, too busy grumbling to actually respond? the nasty feeling in your stomach only grew as he watched you swallow harshly, too humiliated to tell him the real reason all whilst he refused to read between the lines until you actually said something.
the office felt too small, and for the first time during the entire interaction, jungkook swore he could read genuine discomfort on your face.
it was as though the conversation at hand was something you weren’t expecting, simply assuming this was another instance where he’d bow down and allow you to be bratty but, alas - he could see this time that this was different. you weren’t annoyed, you weren’t even upset; you looked hurt.
it was an emotion he couldn’t quite understand, knowing fully he had absolutely done nothing wrong, not having even seen his phone since lunch time. rationality mattered little between the both of you, especially whenever it concerned you, but this was strange even for you. your sudden silence, your lips pressing into each other as you looked away from him, eyes unsure, gaze confused - it had his stomach dropping.
the humiliation was heavy in your frame as you realised how stupid you were being. you had marched here in these heels, a pair that were currently ruining your feet as you spoke, wincing a little as you shifted your toes to make it more comfortable. twenty minutes of amping your own emotions up only to arrive and realise the disgusting, simple fact of jungkook had been divorced by you.
you. you alone.
you had made the decision.
you had chosen to kick him out, break up the marriage over petty arguments that were a norm if anything.
you had done that, with the full expectation of him still fulfilling his husbandly duties as though you had any right to him, any access.
that alone was a horrible pill to swallow.
unfortunately for you, if anyone knew you inside and out, it was the very man in front of you. he reached over to you, tilting your chin forwards, and then up, so that your unsure eyes met his, all whilst you maintained your bratty nature by keeping your mouth shut. he wanted nothing more than to ruin your lips for even starting with him today, with that sleek gloss covering each inch of surface.
you hated when he looked at you like this, as though he was able to dismantle the corners of your feigned disdain, softening them, eroding them until all that was left was you. only you.
before you could look away, you watched as your hunk of an ex husband, all muscle and all tattoos, dropped to his knees in front of you. his arms came around your waist, yanking you forward until either of your legs were around him, his hands heavy on your back. your skirt rode up naturally, allowing him to slot in against you, forcing you to maintain eye contact despite the intimate position.
you flailed for a moment, gasping, everything happening so suddenly but his grip on you was harsh, mean even.
“you thought i was with someone else?” he immediately challenged.
his eyes were narrowed, scowl evident on his lips as he looked at you harshly, as though the notion was enough to genuinely piss him off. despite his nature, he wasn’t one to ever get angry with you, usually directing his annoyance elsewhere but in moments like this, you exasperated him enough that he had no option but to tell you.
“jungkook-“
“missed two fucking calls,” he hissed at you, pulling you closer, harsher. “and you’re already mapping random shit in your head? you trying to piss me off on purpose?”
heat flooded your face in embarrassment, already feeling heat in your chest with the way he looked so annoyed. you hated how attractive he was.
“that’s not what i said.”
“yeah?” he scoffed at you openly, one hand moving to the side to grip your waist instead. “you walked over here in those heels over nothing?”
you hid the insecurity on your face underneath a layer of annoyance, bratty to the core even when you knew you weren’t in the right.
“what’s it to you? if you don’t want me visiting, i won’t come again.” you huffed, pressing him by his shoulders to push him back and away from you.
unfortunately for you, jungkook was made half from stone - unmovable, with biceps thicker than your head, chest and shoulders so broad that it often had your eyelashes fluttering up at him even when you didn’t realise.
“don’t try that shit with me, y/n. you’re in your own head about something that isn’t real, and you’re taking it out on me.”
his tone was laced with something that had your throat swallowing a lump, your eyes struggling to maintain eye contact due to the heavy, and intense heat in his gaze. he was openly pissed off, and you wished you weren’t battling so many emotions at the same time, instead wanting to capitalise on it.
instead of responding, you huffed a little, looking away despite it all. you lifted your chin slightly, ignoring your wandering fingers that were already tracing his tattoos out of habit, grumbling a little under your breath. you hated that he had managed to figure you out so easily, as though he knew the ridges of your brain far more than you yourself, able to peel apart each nasty thought that occupied your thought simply because he could.
you couldn’t let him win. you wouldn’t.
“maybe i wouldn’t think like this if you just answered your phone.” you huffed back at him, returning the eye contact once you had finally settled into your usual bratty self. “god forbid i assume my ex husband might actually move on one day. how am i supposed to know what you get up to all day here?”
you laughed once. sharp. mean. defensive.
“wouldn’t exactly be shocking, would it?” you hissed once more. “we’re divorced.”
for a moment, silence filled the room, all whilst jungkook remained awfully still in front of you.
a sick part of you felt rewarded in thinking you had managed to hit him right where it hurt, to act as a reminder that despite everything, you were the one in control, but that emotion completely slipped away once you watched him stand up.
he stood to his full height, causing you to tip your head back to maintain the eye contact from your sat position. instead of moving back, his hands dropped from your back and waist.
his left hand rose, fingers immediately darting until they reached your throat, wrapping firmly. enough to push your head towards his, and not enough to hurt, his darkened eyes showcasing the same scary, obsessive streak that had you moaning into your pillow every night.
you could feel dampness between your legs, your heartbeat quickening immediately at the showcase of such dominance above you, your eyelids growing almost hooded whilst he leaned down until your breaths were mingling.
“careful.” he reminded, for the second time that night, long fingers digging into either side of your neck.
you, who had never learnt a lesson for long enough to actually make a difference a day in your life, couldn’t help the look of utter petulance on your face.
“or what?” you spat at him.
within seconds, you were put in a state of vertigo as you were yanked up from your seat. before you could realise what was happening, jungkook had you in his lap, yanked forwards so that your ass was jutted out into the air. your skirt had been pushed up, leaving your tiny panties on show.
“j-jungkook!” you squeaked but he took no notice, your arms going up to wrap around his neck all whilst he planted his palm heavy against your now bare ass.
smack.
you squeaked louder.
he didn’t bother saying anything, soothing your ass cheek as though he hadn’t just smacked it. that was, until he repeated his action, the noise sounding off of the walls of the office.
smack.
over, and over, and over, and over.
he didn’t stop, repeating his action of soothing your ass only to slap it harder, all until you were a mewling mess, whimpering at him like a wounded puppy, his eyes harsher than you’d ever seen him. you felt sore, both of his hands now massaging you despite his growing annoyance.
the office was silent apart from the sound of your shaking breath, all whilst you clung to him, your eyes still matching his in a heavy, tension filled gaze that neither of you could look away from. he wanted to coo at you, wanted to hold you, kiss it better but fuck; he wouldn’t have you thinking like this ever again.
“the problem with you is you think a piece of paper changed shit between us.” he whispered down at you suddenly, voice meaner than you’d ever heard him. your eyelashes fluttered. “makes you think a judge signing off on some fucking divorce means you’re any less mine.”
“kook..” you whined quietly, causing him to massage deeper.
“that’s not how this works, baby. get that through your thick skull before i fuck it back into you, you understand me?” he warned, all whilst pushing his head against yours.
your noses touched, rubbing together almost romantically as he nuzzled against you, positioning you better on his lap despite the incessant sting on your ass. he slid your legs over his legs as he brought you closer and closer, his intensely large frame entirely engulfing you.
“we’re not together though..” you whispered at him, the horrible insecurity that remained deep in your bones, the same one you refused to ever show him, bleeding into your tone. “it’s only a matter of time before you meet someone new. even i know that.”
your admission was raw, honest - far more than you’d ever been in a very long time. he knew that, he could see it, especially with the way you felt utterly scared at even letting the words leave your mouth, nibbling on your lip immediately after as though you almost regretted being so truthful.
“what you want, y/n? want a ring? i’ll marry you today.” he scoffed down at you, as though your words were utter bullshit, anger still heavy in his veins. “you are my girl. you hear me? you. you’re mine, every bit of you, and i’m yours.”
you swallowed down the lump in your throat, as he began to kiss at your cheek, your nose and jaw, planting promises deep into your skin so that you’d absorb them as truth. he didn’t care that you guys weren’t together due to a technicality - you were his wife, entirely, fully. no one would ever be able to take that away from him.
the next few hours were spent in a way that felt like home.
he had first spent the first hour just holding you, watching you trace the tattoo peaking from his chest, the colours up and down his arm all whilst nuzzling deeper into him like you hadn’t been a bitch to him for no reason. his hands had roamed up and down you, cupping you warmly, touching you at times inappropriately just to have your usual brattiness shine through.
alas, work called, and so he placed you onto the couch in the office, murmuring something about ordering you food before kissing your head, turning to leave. the whine you let out was enough to have him curse under his breath, knowing he spoilt you far too often and that’s why you were doing what you were.
it wasn’t until you were dragging him back to you that he understood exactly what you wanted.
it had been two years since the divorce - no intimacy beside him going down on you here and there, but apart from that, it was all hidden kisses down your neck and gropes on your ass whenever he’d walk past.
that didn’t stop him from leaning down, one hand on the head of the sofa beside your head and pressing his lips to yours.
the breathy sound that escaped you from being kissed by him was truly enough to drive a man like jungkook wild, his lips moving, guiding, encouraging you to catch up with him. you did exactly that, hands yanking him further down until you could wrap your arms around his neck, kissing him as though this was the most natural thing you knew how to do.
he was your husband, after all.
parting from his lips, you both watched as a thin string of saliva separated you.
standing up tall had your eyes falling to the evident bulge in his utility trousers, your eyelashes fluttering up at him as you pretended to be indifferent to it. you hummed a little, raising your hand. “you can go now.”
the corner of his lip lifted.
such a fucking minx.
the rest of the day had him popping into the office, bringing you food, spending time with you whenever it was quiet. you gave him a haul at one point, showing him all the things you had bought with his hard earned money, even mentioning the bag you had eyed up earlier.
his response?
he had tilted his head in confusion, asking you why you didn’t buy it despite you telling him the price tag.
you had never been wetter.
by the time the garage was closing, he had you in the car, bags already put into the boot, whilst a heavy hand sat on your thigh, driving you home.
it felt like something had completely shifted between you now the unspoken had been spoken. it made you feel good, but you wanted more, craved it - you had spent so long pushing him away, even when you were married, that you had forgotten what it was like just to give into his affections. even slightly, it felt fulfilling in a way that left you hungry.
once your driveway came into view, you already knew he was gonna stay the night. it was common enough, usually forcing him to stay in the guest room like you wouldn’t be up all night wishing he would just come in already. alas, you had married, and divorced, a respectful man.
“kids coming back tomorrow morning?” he asked as he parked up, both of you walking to the door, all of the bags in his hand.
“afternoon.” you corrected over your shoulder, eyes meeting his. you watched as his eyes lifted from your ass in your tiny skirt, cheeks already slightly bruised and red from your earlier spankings, only for his gaze to lift back up to you.
he didn’t respond, simply following you in, locking the door behind him as you slipped off your heels.
“my feet hurt.” you huffed a little to yourself whilst flexing your toes a little.
he let out a slight laugh, placing your bags down on the kitchen table before grabbing you by the waist, lips attacking your neck almost immediately. your back hit his chest as he took a hold of your personal space, breathing in your floral scent now that you were all alone, with no one to interrupt.
no kids.
no garage.
nothing but the two of you and the dying tension between you.
“ugh!” you huffed, brattiness at an all time high, despite tilting your head so he could kiss you further. “you stink.”
“yeah?” he continued his kisses, fingers digging into your hips. “gonna join me in the shower?”
you rolled your eyes, just as he twirled you, towering over you so easily that you found yourself tilting your head just to be able to meet his gaze. his hardened jaw, the feel of his abs where your hands sat on his stomach - you hated him.
“you wish.” you retorted, just as his hands drifted down to your ass.
a large hand smoothed your ass, causing you to wince up at him a little, falling further into his chest causing him to laugh. you swatted his chest with a huff, hissing at him.
“meet me in there in two.” he whispered into your ear, squeezing once more before you huffed again, walking upstairs to your own room.
within the next five minutes, the water had been turned on, and jungkook had pulled his t-shirt off, grunting a little as he undressed in what he had always deemed to be a too small bathroom. it wasn’t until the door opened and he watched you walk in, just as the water had begun to spray down onto his chest, that he felt his stomach tighten.
he watched as you undressed, clothes pooling at your feet, your bra and panties dropping in seconds all whilst you joined him in the shower, almost paying him no mind as though he too wasn’t here. it wasn’t until you stepped back into him, letting the water hit your body instead of his that he properly yanked you back, bodies suddenly flushed against each other.
he tilted your head for the millionth time that day, lips grazing over your pulse, kissing as though he truly couldn’t get enough. he hummed against it, tongue tracing over it as his hands openly began running up and down you, clutching your breasts, your thighs, your stomach.
he loved when you acted like this. all snooty, as though he was beneath you despite your legs parting just as his hands drifted down. his, bratty girl. what a dream.
“missed this.” he whispered into your ear, just as you reached for the body wash.
“need to wash my body.” you huffed back, looking over your shoulder at him in that familiar bitchy way, only for him to lean downwards towards your face.
he grinned, twisting you properly in his arms so that you were actually facing him. the glare you gave him was enough to have his cock twitching against you, causing you to look down momentarily.
you could have sighed out of content, feeling it against you, so, so thick. so large, pressed against his stomach as he openly admired you, his own hands roaming over you as though he had every right.
the last time you had both hooked up was after you had signed the divorce papers. he had pounded you in the courthouse bathroom, with a hand over your mouth, and a hiss in your ear reminding you that no matter what, you still belonged to him, to which you had nodded, promising him. you were both so fucked for each other it was unreal.
queue two years later, you hadn’t actually seen his cock in so long despite having craved it for what felt like eons. despite what you felt, you knew you couldn’t bring yourself to cave in, yearning for something more than just sex and you couldn’t afford to get attached without it.
here you were, with that exact thing.
you were both so fucked in the head when it came to one another, with jungkook even going so far as to make a dildo for you that replicated his cock, just so you could pleasure yourself the exact way you wanted. it killed him inside to know you used it every night instead of using him, but with you in his arms right now, he hardly gave a fuck.
he watched as you lifted one of your hands, fingers brushing against the tip, all whilst your big eyes fluttered up at him in a sort of faux innocence. he cupped your hand, bringing it to his lips, before wrapping it around his cock properly.
you let out another sigh of content as you pumped him, up and down, all whilst water cascaded down onto both of your bodies. his head pressed against yours, lips brushing against one another so naturally it felt innate to the both of you.
his breath hitched just slightly as you used both hands, your heart fluttering at the feel of him so intimately against you.
“my pretty girl.” he pressed sweet pecks to your lips, whilst you tilted your head up at him, his hands openly massaging your ass again.
“so big.” you whispered back at him with a little sigh, thumb tracing over his slitted tip. “yeah? been stretching yourself out every night on your own?”
“trying to.” you mumbled back. his hand cupped yours, guiding you faster. “just too big sometimes to do it on my own.”
his eyes closed at your words, letting out a shaking breath, gripping you so much tighter before opening them up once more. he nudged his nose against yours, before pressing his lips harshly to yours.
your lips immediately moved in unison, bodies aligning as you both pumped his cock as though you couldn’t get enough of one another. tongues wrapped until they became one, your soft moans gliding through the falling water as jungkook pushed, and pushed and pushed until you were pressed against the wall.
by the time he was parting from your lips, you were a panting mess, your chest rising and falling. your hand dropped from his cock as he lifted you in his arms, your back pressed against the cool tile whilst he took your left breast in his mouth. sucking, biting, moaning - he was a mess against you, your hands pulling at his long strands that were growing damper by the second from the falling water.
the moan of his name on your tongue had him hissing, moving to your right breast. you had become a mural, a physical manifestation of his morbid love as he decorated you in purple bruises, your big eyes closing in sheer pleasure.
“don’t wanna wait anymore.” you whimpered at him, shaking your head as you began to pull his hair off of you.
he hissed a little from the shot of pain, not afraid to admit his cock twitched from the shock of it. at that, he gave your ass another smack, watching the way you squeaked before narrowing your eyes at him with a loud huff.
“need to stretch you out before i fuck you.” he grunted at you, both of your cheeks flushed from the steam of the shower.
“i don’t care. want it now.”
“stop being a fucking brat.” he hissed again, spanking you for the umpteenth time, your poor ass bruised.
you slid down from his arms, narrowing your eyes at him as you cheekily turned away. he stuck his tongue deep into his cheek as he watched you, soap suds washing down your body before you reached for a towel, sliding out before he could even stop you, only to watch you slip out of the bathroom immediately.
he wanted to curse. his cock had never been so hard in his life, and oh, the things he wanted to do to you - he felt like a born again virgin, having been celibate the second you had pushed him away after the courthouse fiasco. he matched your movements, washing his body before grabbing a towel, drying himself off and walking to your room.
the sight of you on the bed, sat, still in the towel, huffing a little as you checked your nails, pretending to be completely disinterested in him had his jaw ticking again. such a fucking brat.
you opened your mouth, no doubt to spew some utter bullshit to rile him up, but he didn’t give you a chance. within seconds, he had his hands on you, dropping you fully onto the bed, hovering over you, both towels on the ground almost immediately.
the sight of him on top of you, inbetween your legs had you rendered speechless for the first time in eons, a shaking gasp leaving you. it was the feel of his cock running up and down your already weeping pussy that had you actually letting out loud whimpers and whines, rotating your hips in hopes you could finally get what you wanted.
“spoilt rotten. that’s your fucking problem.” he hissed at you, grabbing your face with one of his hands, forcing you to look at him. “always get what you want.”
“because you always wanna give it to me.” you whimpered back at him, grabbing onto his shoulders before raising your legs higher, begging for more.
he hated how true your statement was.
before you could think, jungkook lined himself and began to push inside, all whilst watching your eyes widen only for them to shut tightly.
euphoric. that was the only, single emotion he could describe the feeling of his cock being hugged by your velvet walls after so long, your pussy clinging to him almost as desperately as he pushed and pushed until he was entirely inside of you. you couldn’t breathe, not when you swore you could feel him inside your stomach, your fingers digging so deeply into his shoulders you swore you’d scar him.
even when you masturbated on your own with the dildo, you struggled to take him fully, but having him all but bullying his cock inside of you, making sure you took it all? nothing had never felt better, with his sheer size stretching a home deep inside of you, one that you had missed more than anything else.
“jungkook.” you mewled out, lip already about to quiver.
god.
he had dreamt of this exact situation.
you, underneath him, chest rising and falling whilst your tits were decorated in bruises, symbols of his devotion to you. his cock, thick and heavy, deep inside of you as he watched you quiver trying to accommodate for him despite knowing it was all too much. god, he had dreamt indeed and yet it paled in comparison to what he was seeing.
two years.
two years of being denied this, and here he was, finally claiming his girl once more.
instead of letting you adjust, jungkook grabbed the bottoms of your thighs, lifting them slightly before beginning to thrust.
had you been a normal girl, he would have been gentler, kinder, maybe even sweeter but he knew you better than anyone else. you were a slut for him, through and through - couldn’t cum unless he was mean to your pussy.
and so, he did what any good ex husband would do.
he pounded.
your moans turned into loud whines of pleasure, back arching as jungkook set out a pace that you certainly couldn’t keep up with, scratching over his shoulders and biceps almost desperately. the chant of his name echoed around the room, only adding to his pace, his head pressing against yours.
“look at you.” he grunted loudly, hips slapping against hips, skin smacking against skin. “needed this so bad, didn’t you?”
“so bad.” you whined, with a shaking nod.
“that’s my girl.” he kissed your nose almost romantically, only making you whimper as he pushed your thighs against your chest, before pressing down on you.
the new position had your back curling upwards as you somehow managed to feel him so much deeper, your hands now shaking in the confinements of his hair. you couldn’t stop thrashing, as though all of the begging to get him to fuck you without actually prepping you were all stupid ramblings now that you couldn’t take it.
he loved the sight. there was nothing jungkook loved more than watching you grow more cockdrunk by the minute, what with the way your eyes were rolling to the back of your head, drool beginning to drip by the corner of your mouth.
he had never been more in love with you.
he pounded you over and over, coaxing orgasm after orgasm out of you until you were an overwhelmed mess, sobbing in his arms whilst trying to shut your legs around him, the overstimulation only gripping you by the throat meanly. by your fourth orgasm, you were babbling utter nonsense, a mixture of tears, mascara and drool all over you.
he had tapped your jaw with his hand, only for you to open up, watching him spit in your mouth. you clenched around him hard just as you swallowed, the sight something he knew he’d replay for time to come over and over over.
“so fucking tight.” he hissed down at you.
your positions had changed, with the both of you on your sides as he thrusted into you, his lips attacking the side of your face and shoulder all whilst you clung to the pillow in front of you, poor pussy leaking on either side of him. you were being ruined in real time.
“gonna get you nice and round baby. you’d like that, hm? like it when kookie fucks his cum into you?” he cooed down at you, condescending enough to have your brain begging for mercy. all you could muster was a loud moan, back arching into him at the promise of another baby. “please. want it so bad.”
“yeah?” he hissed, thrusts only getting meaner. “fuck…gotta put a ring on your finger first.”
at that, your legs began to shake.
“gonna take you out tomorrow morning. gonna cum nice and deep inside of you, and take you ring shopping so you can get what you want, hm?” he hissed down at you through his heavy breaths. “gonna be a good girl for me?”
“mhm..i’ll be so good, k-kookie. promise.” you whimpered.
jungkook gave you a hard thrust. he knew it was a lie.
“should’ve never let you go, baby. been missing my girl so much. should’ve kept you nice and full like you deserve.” he bit down on your shoulder. “but jungkook’s gonna fix it. just need you to cum for me, sweetheart.“
it was like he had control over your mind and body. your orgasm erupted through your body, clamping harshly onto his cock, causing him to choke as his thrusts faltered, already on the edge. waves of excruciating pleasure ran through you, grabbing you at every angle all whilst you coaxed him into his own orgasm, his loud grunts echoing off of the walls.
you could feel his hot cum reach all the way into your womb - a promise of what was to come, an assurance for the future. the thought of having more of his children only stretched out your orgasm as you cried out his name, his large fingers harsh on your clit to really force you over the edge.
by the time you were both settling down, you were a shaking mess.
cum plugged inside of you as he refused to pull out just yet, your bodies both sweating, hair a mess, makeup utterly ruined. jungkook had never seen you look so pretty, wanting nothing more than to propose to you right then and there, but even he knew you deserved far better than that.
it was when only ten minutes later, he turned you fully after pulling out, did he plant soft kisses to your face, all whilst fingering his cum back inside of you. you cried in oversensitivity, only causing him to coo at you, whispering sweet nothings about how good you had taken him, about how he needed the cum to stick to get you round and pregnant.
you could feel your eyes drooping as he took care of you, manoeuvring your body until it was utterly engulfed by his, your body sore and mind free.
for the first time in two years, you felt like you were home.
—
true to his promise, you were both out of the house by the early morning.
also true to his word, you were currently stuffed with cum, littered in an array of hickeys both from the previous evening and that morning, causing you to choose an uncharacteristically modest outfit for the day. you had hissed at him all the way to the shop, huffing at having to hide your body in full length clothing only for him to smirk quietly to himself.
he couldn’t get enough of you.
still bitching, still whining - he had stopped pretending like he didn’t like it, especially when you could see right through him. he was yours, yes, but oh how you were his. he had woken you up to his mouth on your clit, coaxing you to a sweet orgasm before fucking you with the promises of a life even grander than the one you were currently living. that alone had gotten three orgasms out of you.
now, you were in the ring shop, frowning, flicking your hair and rolling your eyes at him with every ring you were shown, rudely grumbling over how it just wasn’t the one.
the one you had on was beautiful, which only irritated you more.
you made the effort of moving your hand in three separate angles, turning it to the light, turning your wrist away. the diamond caught every flicker, as it shon and sang to you, all whilst you pursed your lips.
“i don’t like it.”
the jeweller openly frowned at you.
this had been the tenth ring he had shown you, and none of them made you happy. none were the ring you had envisioned, wanting something different and yet something classic, the oxymoron killing you from the inside out.
whilst the man behind the counter was quite startled by your behaviour, jungkook was certainly not.
he stood beside you, t shirt stretched over his figure deliciously, arm heavy around your waist as he maintained you flushed against his figure no matter how bitchy you were being with him. it only had him tightening his fingers on you.
you continued your comments to the jeweller as he showed you more and more rings, before he sensed the growing tension, leaving you both be for a moment. once you were alone on the shop floor, jungkook nudged you a little so you’d look up at him.
“enough.”
the word was quiet. commanding. enough to have your pussy clenching despite how sore you already were, not that it was enough to stop you wanting him in every single way. unfortunately, despite your lapse in demeanour the night before, you weren’t willing to let it show easily again.
you huffed. “none of these are right.”
“you’re being nitpicky on purpose.”
“maybe i just have standards.” you rolled your eyes at him, making a show of crossing your arms across your chest.
it was his turn to make his eyes narrow down at you meanly.
“you done?” he asked, with a small hiss. “your ass not sore enough, y/n?”
you grit your teeth as you willed yourself to be quiet, wanting nothing more than to rebut at him but even you knew jeon jungkook was certainly not above spanking you in a jewellery shop, especially if it meant you’d actually shut up. so, instead, you found yourself huffing a little at him again, picking at your manicure.
“just don’t wanna pick the wrong one.” you admitted in a much smaller voice, refusing to meet his eyes as you ruined your french tips, frown heavy on your face.
the admission was quiet, barely above a mumble but it hit jungkook right in his chest, knowing that despite the rushed nature of everything, this symbolised something so much bigger. starting again when the first time around had been a rush in itself was scary, especially when the stakes were so much higher this time. sure, you had been divorced once and you were marrying him again but you knew this meant you guys would actually have to work through your annoyances with one another.
the thought honestly scared you.
his devotion, his obsession, his incessant need to have you in his arms whether you liked him or not was reciprocated heavily by yourself, only masked with an air of indifference.
“baby.”
he pulled you out of your thoughts, making you look up through your lashes.
“buy as many as you fucking want. you want seven, huh? all days of the week?” he narrowed his eyes down at you. “there isn’t a wrong one, so get that out of your head.”
for the first time in that interaction, you properly turned into his arms, wrapping your arms around his neck with a soft sigh of content at his words. good answer, you thought, as you nuzzled into his neck, all whilst he pushed you against the jewellery counter.
by the time the owner had come back, you had finally made your selection, feeling almost shy as you watched jungkook pay for it. sure, you spent his money without thinking, but you were quickly realising how much better it felt with him beside you actually taking charge of the transaction part. the thought began to fester all over you as he signed the receipt, turning to walk you out as the jeweller began sizing the rings immediately.
unfortunately for him, you pressed your lips to his cheek in the sweetest action you could muster. judging from the flip in your eyes, the way affection swirled in them, he knew you wanted something.
“what?” he grunted.
“so..remember that bag?”
—
my babies!! i’m back!!
my first fic / one shot since the mature label got slapped on my page which means half of my followers won’t see this but i’m keeping optimistic!!
as usual, let me know your thoughts, i loveeeee reading your guys’ comments and asks so feel free to keep me in the loop with what you’re thinking
if you wanna support a bad b pay her london rent, my kofi is here <3
mafia jeon jungkook set his eyes on you long before you ever noticed him. you, the club’s silent dancer, the one who never spoke, never allowed a single touch yet left men breathless with every movement. a fantasy men paid thousands just to witness, a mystery wrapped in silk and silence. one look at you, and jeon knew that resistance would be futile.
〴note: i didn’t think id share this because i was really insecure abt it for the longest time, but i‘ve made some nunu changes so here we are. think of this oneshot as a soft, reverent kiss on the cheek from me to you. ︴
• word count: 9k
The club had been the posession of Jeon for exactly seven days.
No more crowds, no more wandering eyes. No more hands reaching for what was never theirs to begin with.
Jeon had burned every bridge, erased every extra pair of eyes until the neon drenched room breathed only for the two of you. The bass pulsed low and heavy, but the only heartbeat that mattered now was the one hammering between your locked gazes.
You circled the pole once, eyes never leaving his.
Jeon’s breath stayed even, but his fingers tightened slightly on the armrest. He could feel the aching, all consuming obsession clawing deeper under his skin.
This was the woman who had haunted him since the very first night.
Months ago, he had walked into this same club for business only.
Corrupt politicians sat across from Jeon in the VIP lounge, sealing dirty deals in low voices while his men guarded the doors, guns heavy in their pockets. lust filled men threw money at the stage like confetti, but Jeon hadn’t spared the dancers a single glance. He was here to collect what was owed, nothing more.
once the deal was done, he stood, lighting a cigarette as he headed toward the dimly lit back hallway that smelled of cheap perfume and sweat. The smoke curled from his lips.
Then, you came out of nowhere, colliding straight into his chest with a soft, startled sound.
Out of pure reflex, Jeon’s gun was out and pressed to your forehead before either of you could blink. His other hand gripped your upper arm hard, steadying you from the collision. His eyes were black ice, voice a dangerous growl.
“Do you want to die, little girl?”
You didn’t scream, nor did you flinch away. You just stared up at him, wide eyes flooded with raw fear and a deep, quiet sadness that hit him like a blade between the ribs. Your chest rose and fell rapidly against his grip, but no words came.
Jeon clicked his tongue, annoyed at the lack of apology, intrigued by the delicate creature trembling under his hold. He stepped closer, crowding you back against the cold wall until his broad frame swallowed yours completely as he pinned you there. The barrel of the gun lowered slowly, but he didn’t release you.
You were tiny compared to him. His broad frame completely eclipsed yours, caging you in without effort. Yet even in fear, you held a quiet, striking beauty that hit him harder than it should have.
He lowered the barrel slowly, but didn’t release you. Instead, he leaned in and blew a thin stream of smoke directly into your face.
You coughed; soft and startled, the first sound he ever heard from you.
It was barely a breath, fragile and sweet, and something dark and possessive stirred low in his gut.
Jeon traced the edge of the gun slowly down the side of your neck, the cold metal gliding over your pulse point. He was looking for a whimper, a flinch, any sound of fear. Instead, you only gasped silently, lips parting further, body staying perfectly still despite the tremble running through your smaller frame.
His free hand rose, knuckles brushing your soft cheek with surprising gentleness for a man who had just held a gun to your head. He watched the pretty blush bloom under his touch, your big eyes glassy with fear. You were breathtaking.
“Pretty little thing,” he said quietly, almost to himself, dark eyes drinking you in. “All quiet and scared… but you don’t run. Interesting.”
Before he could push further, hurried footsteps echoed.
“I’m so sorry, Mr. Jeon!” Your manager came rushing, bowing repeatedly, voice shaking. “She doesn’t speak much. she’s new, probably just got lost back here. She won’t cause any trouble, I swear.”
The man yanked you away from Jeon’s grip, still apologizing profusely. You disappeared quickly down the hall without a backward glance, robe fluttering behind you.
Jeon let you go, but his eyes stayed glued to the spot where you had vanished, the ghost of your warmth and that silent, fearful gaze burning into him.
He left that night with interest already blooming like poison in his veins.
Jeon returned the next friday for another deal. This time, while he was making his way out, he saw you once again when you stepped onto the stage, moving like liquid shadow whilst the crowd whistled and threw bills, but you never smiled, never engaged. Your eyes scanned the room once… and landed on him.
Tension crackled instantly, thick and electric. You held his gaze longer than anyone else’s.
Later, after your set, Jeon watched from the hallway as a drunk regular tried to grab your wrist near the curtain. You pulled back sharply, ice cold refusal in every line of your body. The manager intervened quickly, muttering, “She doesn’t let anyone touch her, ever. That’s her rule. She’s the most demanded girl here right now because of it.”
Jeon’s jaw tightened. He made a single quiet call that night.
By the third visit, fewer men lingered near the stage when you danced.
By the fifth, the ones who still tried to approach you started disappearing.
And now, seven days after he bought the entire club, the room was empty except for him.
The low lights dimmed even further as the last staff member slipped out without a word. The heavy velvet curtain behind the small private stage parted.
You stepped into the glow barefoot, silk robe sliding off one shoulder, the same calm mask on your face that never cracked for anyone. Your eyes found his immediately. Not by accident, not shyly. They locked on unblinking, the way they had every single night since the first time he sat in that booth months ago.
The same quiet fear lived in your eyes, the same deep, unspoken sadness. But tonight, there was something else threading through it... resignation, maybe. Or the first fragile thread of curiosity.
Jeon sat perfectly still in the wide leather chair, legs spread, one arm draped lazily over the backrest, the other resting on his thigh. Black shirt unbuttoned at the collar, sleeves rolled to his forearms. He didn’t smile, didn’t speak first. He simply let the tension stretch between you like a live wire.
You never spoke. not once. not even now, when the entire club was empty except for the two of you and the rules had finally bent enough for this: one private dance. For him. Only him.
You let the robe fall. It pooled at your feet like spilled ink, revealing the delicate set underneath, lace kissing the curves he had memorized from a distance for so long.
Your body moved before the first heavy beat dropped. Every roll of your hips, every arch of your spine, every slide of your palms down your own thighs was controlled, never giving enough.
Jeon’s breath stayed even, but his fingers tightened slightly on the armrest. He could feel the obsession clawing deeper under his skin, soft, aching and all consuming.
You dropped low, thighs parting as you sank into a slow crouch, back arching until your hair brushed the floor. The lights painted gold across your skin, catching on the faint sheen of glitter still lingering from earlier. When you rose again, you stepped closer, close enough that the heat of you brushed against the air in front of him, close enough that he could smell the faint vanilla on your skin, but never enough to taste it.
Your palms slid up the pole again as you spun, slow and sinful, one leg hooking high, body stretching into a perfect line that made the ache in his chest twist into something hotter.
Your eyes stayed locked on his the entire time, calm on the surface, but he saw the flicker of the fear that never quite left, and the sadness that made him want to wrap the whole damn world in silence just so nothing could touch you again.e simply watched, dark eyes heavy with the kind of worship that only a man like him could give, soft in its intensity, dangerous in its patience.
Jeon was painfully aware of your rules. No one touched you. No one saw more than you chose to offer.
Yet, you were still the most prized, most wanted thing that had ever existed in this club. And now, you were his alone.
His cock strained hard against the front of his slacks, thick and throbbing with every slow roll of your hips. The flimsy fabric of your top barely hid the soft swell of your breasts, nipples faintly visible through the lace. Those thin panties clung to you, the delicate material doing nothing to hide the outline of what lay beneath. Every time you moved, his mouth went dry with the need to taste, to bury his face between those pretty thighs and worship until the sadness in your eyes melted into pleasure.
He had paid you more than anyone ever had, enough that you could walk away from this life tomorrow if you wanted. Enough for that quiet, secluded place you dreamed about, far from bruises and leering eyes.
But tonight you were still here, dancing only for him, giving him more than you had ever given anyone. That knowledge sent a dark thrill through his veins.
You intrigued him. The way your eyes always found his shadow in the dark, the way you bent and twisted as if trying to see past the low lights to the man watching you so obsessively. He had never once tried to touch you, never pushed past your boundaries even though he could have overpowered you in a heartbeat. And that restraint only made his obsession burn hotter, because he respected you. Needed you to come to him on your own terms.
Jeon couldn’t handle the temptation much longer.
Months of watching you, months of dreaming about sliding his hands over your soft skin, kissing away the fear in your eyes, giving you everything you could ever ask for. But what drove him truly insane was your silence.
You had a voice, he had heard that soft little cough the night you first collided with him... but no one in the club had ever heard you speak. The quiet mystery of you made his cock twitch painfully.
He mumbled a quiet curse under his breath, shifting in his seat as you slid down gracefully and sat on the edge of the small stage, legs dangling toward him.
Jeon reached into his pocket and pulled out a thick stack of bills, placing them on the small table beside his chair. His rough voice came out, patience laced with raw hunger.
“Touch yourself. Now.”
Your eyes widened slightly, that familiar fear and sadness flickering, but something else shimmered there too, heat, the same quiet intensity that had been building between you for months.
You didn’t speak, but you obeyed.
Slowly, shyly, your fingers hooked into the waistband of your thin lace panties. You slid them down your legs and set them aside, but the moment they left your body, one hand moved instantly to cover yourself, palm pressed flat and firm over your pussy, hiding the most intimate part of you even as your thighs parted wide for his gaze.
Jeon’s breath left him in a slow, controlled exhale, eyes darkening to near black as he leaned forward slightly, elbows on his knees.
He could see everything except the center of you: the smooth skin of your inner thighs, the soft curve where your ass met the stage, the way your fingers trembled just slightly as they pressed against your folds.
It was the most erotic thing he had ever witnessed, your shyness, the way you still protected what no one had ever been allowed to see or touch.
You started with slow, hesitant circles hidden beneath your palm, shy strokes that made your hips roll gently. Your breath came in quiet pants.
In your mind, it was all him. Those intense dark eyes watching you. His large, veined hands instead of your own. His broad frame hovering over you, commanding you to keep going while he finally touched what no one else ever had. The fantasy made you wetter, made your palm press harder, fingers sliding through slick heat while still keeping everything carefully covered.
A tiny, breathy sound escaped you, the softest whimper.
Jeon’s cock throbbed visibly against his slacks. He palmed himself once, eyes never leaving the place where your hand disappeared between your spread thighs.
“Good girl,” he murmured, voice thick with restrained hunger.
Your cheeks adorned a soft flush, thighs trembling as you spread them even wider for him, giving him the full view of your smooth skin and the obscene way your palm shielded your pussy. Your back arched slightly as your hidden fingers moved faster under your palm. The sadness in your eyes was still there, but it was drowning in heat now, heat directed only at him
Jeon’s gaze burned into you, obsession coiling tight in his chest. He wanted to replace that shy little hand with his own so fucking badly. Wanted to pry your thighs open wider, pull your palm away, and finally see what you hid so tenderly and what he deemed belonged to him.
Wanted to sink two thick fingers deep inside you, curl them slow while his thumb worked your clit. He wanted to replace that shy little hand with his own so fucking badly. Wanted to pry your thighs open wider until you broke that perfect silence with his name. Wanted to taste you, then pull you into his lap and keep you there safe, owned and protected until the fear in your eyes disappeared for good.
But he didn’t move.
Your fingers pressed harder beneath your palm, legs trembling, breaths coming quicker. You were a soaked mess, glistening down your thighs now and still, he couldn’t see the center of you. Only the way your hand moved, only the mystery of what you kept hidden even while giving him this.
Jeon leaned back slightly, one hand gripping the armrest hard, the other still palming his straining cock through his pants.
He would wait. He would burn. But the day you finally let him touch you… he would ruin you so softly, so completely, that you’d never want anyone else’s hands again.
And in the pulsing neon silence, Jeon was already completely, irreversibly lost in you.
The nights after, began like all the others. You were called to the private room again, just like before, another quiet performance meant only for him.
You had already begun to recognize the rhythm of these nights, the steady anticipation that built inside your chest when you knew he was waiting.
But this time, before you could make it there, your manager grabbed you before you reached the hallway.
Your body jerked backward from the force, arm twisting painfully in his grip. A sharp sting shot up your wrist, and panic surged instantly through your veins. You didn’t cry out, but your body stiffened, shrinking inward like you had done so many times before.
His fingers dug deeper into your skin, nails pressing hard enough to bruise. “You think you’re special?” he hissed, voice ugly with anger. His breath smelled bitter, too close to your face. “Walking around like you run this place now just because one rich bastard throws money at you.”
You shook your head quickly, small and frantic, your free hand pushing weakly against his chest. You weren’t trying to fight him, just trying to create space, to escape that suffocating closeness.
He didn’t let go. Instead, his grip tightened further, forcing a quiet gasp from your throat.
“I’m the one who keeps you here,” he continued harshly. “You think you get to make rules? if i tell you to do something, you’re going to fucking do it!”
You lowered your gaze automatically, shoulders curling inward as your body slipped into survival mode out of fear. The hallway felt smaller now, the sounds of music from the main room distant and unreachable.
His hand shifted from your wrist to your upper arm, squeezing hard enough to make your knees weaken, before he smirked at your fear, his hand now shamelessly trailing down your back.
“You’re going to start sleeping with the customers i give you” he snapped, “or things are going to get a lot worse for you.”
His other hand lifted suddenly. You flinched before it even came down, your eyes squeezing shut as dread surged through your chest.
But the impact never landed. Instead, there was another sound... a dull, sickening crack that echoed sharply through the narrow hallway.
Your manager’s grip vanished instantly. your body stumbled forward from the sudden release, breath tearing from your lungs as you caught yourself against the wall. For a moment, you didn’t understand what had happened as everything felt distant and muffled.
Then you turned, slowly, only to see your manager, on the floor.
His body lay twisted unnaturally against the polished tiles, one arm bent beneath him at an impossible angle. Blood pooled darkly beneath his head, spreading outward in a widening stain that reflected the harsh overhead lights.
Your heart began to pound violently in your chest. Your vision blurred, and then you saw him.
Jeon stood a few feet away, his chest rising and falling slowly, his breathing steady despite the violence that had just unfolded. His knuckles were smeared with blood, crimson streaked across pale skin, dripping slowly to the floor below.
His face was terrifyingly calm, while your entire body began to shake.
Fear surged through you, wrapping tight around your lungs until breathing became painful. You had seen violence before, heard shouting, witnessed cruelty, even had violence inflicted upon you, but never this. Never death.
Your knees weakened beneath you. And then, without meaning to, your voice broke free, soft and fragile, barely louder than a whisper.
Jeon turned toward you slowly, like you were something fragile that might shatter if he moved too quickly.
Your tears began to fall without restraint now, hot and unstoppable, blurring everything around you. Your hands trembled violently at your sides as fear and confusion tangled painfully inside your chest.
“D-don’t…” you whispered weakly, your voice cracking with panic.
You didn’t even know what you meant. Don’t hurt me. Don’t come closer. Don’t leave me alone with this.
Jeon took a slow step toward you. His voice, when he spoke, was lower than before, softer.
“It’s okay,” he murmured quietly.
The gentleness in his tone didn’t match the blood on his hands, and that contradiction made your chest tighten painfully. You pressed yourself back against the wall, shaking uncontrollably as sobs finally broke free from your throat.
Your legs gave out beneath you as you slid downward helplessly, collapsing against the floor as your body surrendered to exhaustion and fear.
Jeon reached you just before your head hit the ground, his hands catching your shoulders with surprising gentleness. The warmth of his touch seeped through your trembling body, grounding you in a way you couldn’t explain.
For a moment, everything felt distant, the music from the main floor, the murmurs of staff beginning to gather at the far end of the hallway. All of it faded into background noise as your fingers instinctively curled into the front of his shirt, gripping the fabric like it was the only thing keeping you upright.
You didn’t realize you were holding onto him until he shifted slightly, steadying your weight more securely.
“It’s alright,” Jeon murmured again, his voice low, though there was something tight beneath it, something restrained. “You’re safe.”
Safe. The word echoed strangely in your mind, foreign and unfamiliar.
Safe wasn’t something you had ever truly known, not in your parents’ house, not on the streets, not even here in the club where you had carved out your fragile set of rules just to survive.
Yet now, pressed against him, you found yourself clinging to that word like it meant everything.
Your sobs came harder, breaking through your chest in uneven waves as the shock finally settled into your bones. You tried to breathe, but every inhale felt like the air itself had turned against you.
Jeon stayed where he was, crouched in front of you, one hand still resting firmly against your shoulder while the other hovered briefly at your back, settling there with careful restraint.
He waited until your breathing slowed slightly before moving again. “we need to leave,” he said quietly.
You stiffened faintly at his words, your grip tightening unconsciously on his shirt as the word stirred unease inside your chest, but the alternative, staying here, in this hallway with your manager’s body only a few feet away was far worse. Your eyes shifted weakly toward the motionless form on the floor, and a fresh tremor rippled through your body.
Without a word, Jeon moved closer, shifting his body just enough to block your view. You didn’t protest when his arm slid beneath your knees.
You barely registered the movement until your body lifted suddenly from the floor, your breath catching in surprise as he gathered you carefully into his arms, as if he had carried fragile things before and knew exactly how much strength to use.
Your hands clutched at his jacket again, fingers trembling against the fabric.
He held you securely, one arm supporting your back, the other beneath your legs, keeping you close enough that you could hear the steady rhythm of his heartbeat beneath your ear.
The hallway around you seemed to blur as he began walking. Voices murmured somewhere nearby, but no one stopped him. no one questioned him. They moved out of his way.
You didn’t look up. Your face remained pressed into his chest, tears still slipping silently down your cheeks as exhaustion settled heavily into your limbs.
Outside, the cold night air hit your skin sharply, making you shiver despite the warmth of his hold. Jeon didn’t hesitate as he moved straight toward a sleek black car waiting near the entrance.
One of his men, though you didn’t recognize the face, stood nearby, silent and attentive. Their eyes flicked briefly toward you before lowering again in quiet understanding.
Jeon slid carefully into the back seat, adjusting his hold on you so that your body rested securely against him rather than the cold leather.
You didn’t realize where he was taking you until the car stopped.
By then, exhaustion had begun to weigh heavily against your eyelids, body still trembling faintly with every passing second. The movement of the car had been strangely calming, the quiet hum of the engine mixing with the steady rhythm of his breathing beneath your ear.
When the door opened again, cool night air brushed across your face. You blinked weakly, lifting your head just enough to see where you were.
Your apartment building stood in front of you.
Relief flickered faintly in your chest, as Jeon stepped out of the car, still holding you securely in his arms.
He didn’t set you down. Instead, he carried you all the way to the entrance, his pace steady despite the narrow stairwell. Each step echoed faintly against the concrete walls as he climbed, never once loosening his grip.
A sudden wave of embarrassment washed over you as your door came into view.
You hadn’t planned for anyone to see this place.
Especially not him.
Jeon paused only long enough for you to fumble weakly with your keys. Your hands trembled badly as you tried to guide the metal into the lock, your breathing uneven as anxiety crawled back into your chest.
He waited patiently, didn’t rush you, didn’t take the keys from your hand.
Eventually, the door clicked open.
You felt the shift in his body immediately once he stepped inside.
You didn’t need to look to know what he was seeing.
The thin mattress on the floor, the nearly empty shelves, the bare walls. There was almost nothing here, nothing that suggested comfort, safety, or even basic living.
Jeon slowly lowered you onto the mattress, his movements careful as he released his hold. The absence of his warmth felt immediate, leaving you suddenly aware of the cold air brushing against your skin.
He stood there for a long moment, gaze moving slowly across the room, taking in every detail of the worn fabric of your blanket, the absence of anything resembling security or protection.
Then his eyes shifted downward, toward the corner of the mattress, noticing the slight bulge beneath it.
You stiffened faintly.
Without speaking, Jeon crouched slightly, lifting the edge of the mattress just enough to reveal what lay hidden beneath.
There were envelopes. Stacks of them, unopened and untouched. All the money he had given you, every last bit of it was still there, kept neatly.
His jaw tightened slowly as realization settled into place. You weren’t living off the money, or spending it.
You were saving. Preparing to leave.
The thought struck something sharp inside his chest as he lowered the mattress again, covering the hidden stacks before turning toward you.
You sat frozen, watching him with wide, uncertain eyes. For a moment, neither of you spoke.
Then, quietly, he asked, “You were going to leave.”
Your throat tightened painfully as you looked down at your hands, fingers twisting weakly together in your lap. You didn’t answer him, but you didn’t deny it either.
You hadn’t meant for him to see this, not the apartment, not the truth of how you lived. The image of your life laid bare in front of him felt far more exposing than standing under stage lights ever had.
“You’re not staying here.” The words came suddenly, cutting cleanly through the silence before you could even lift your head.
You looked up at him slowly. Jeon was standing in the center of the room now, his broad frame rigid as his gaze swept across the apartment once more. His eyes moved from the mattress beneath you to the bare corners of the walls, then to the thin door that separated you from the rest of the building. His jaw tightened slightly, a faint muscle ticking beneath the skin as if he were holding something back.
“This place…” he muttered quietly, almost to himself, his gaze drifting toward the single window. “There’s no security. No protection.”
You swallowed, fingers tightening nervously around the edge of the blanket beneath you.
You had known that. Every night you had laid down here, listening to footsteps outside your door, every creak making your body tense. But knowing didn’t mean you had another choice.
Jeon turned toward you again, his expression hard but not cruel. There was frustration there, yes, but beneath it sat something that looked dangerously close to concern.
“You have money,” he said, his voice quieter now but no less firm. “Enough to live somewhere better than this.”
Your throat tightened painfully at that.
Slowly, your gaze dropped toward the mattress beneath you. You hesitated for a moment before reaching down, fingers trembling slightly as you lifted the corner of the mattress. The stack of envelopes came into view, carefully arranged in a way that made it obvious they had never been spent.
Jeon watched in silence as you pulled them out one by one, stacking them carefully in your lap.
“What’s your name?” he asked quietly, not really expecting an answer.
You didn’t look up. Your gaze stayed fixed on the floor, on your trembling fingers, anywhere but him.
He didn’t push. He understood.
You didn’t speak not because you couldn’t, but because speaking had always cost you something. You had learned early on that silence was safer, that keeping your thoughts, fears, and even your voice to yourself was the only control you could hold.
And in a world where hands could hurt more than words ever could, silence had become both shield and sanctuary for you.
Jeon studied you quietly for a long moment, noting the tension in your shoulders, the slight tremor in your lips. The thought of leaving you here in this fragile state, with nothing and no one felt unbearable to him.
Finally, he straightened.
“I’ll find you somewhere better, safer. Somewhere you don’t have to look over your shoulder every second. You won’t dance in clubs anymore.”
He paused, letting the weight of his words settle. “I’m not forcing you,” he added, softer now, almost gentle. “But it’s dangerous. people saw me with you tonight. The manager…” His jaw tightened slightly. “What happened back there doesn’t stay in this city.”
You remained still, silent as always, but your gaze flicked faintly toward him. He crouched slightly, as if to match your level again, giving you the space to absorb the gravity of the situation.
Then, without another word, he turned. The sudden sound of the apartment door opening and closing filled the space behind you, leaving you alone with the weight of his absence.
And then, it happened.
You rose unsteadily to your feet, the exhaustion, fear, and sudden surge of emotion coalescing into a desperate, unplanned movement. You stepped forward and pressed yourself against him, wrapping your arms around his torso before he could fully clear the doorway.
“Wait,” you whispered, a soft, broken sound.
Jeon’s body froze, a hand halfway out to the doorknob, eyes wide as he registered the unexpected voice.
“Don’t go,” you murmured, voice so soft it almost blended with your rapid breathing.
He stayed still, hesitation creeping into the edges of his controlled composure. The man who had dealt with threats, and death without flinching was now caught completely off guard by the quiet, trembling sound of your voice and the fact that you had chosen this moment to break the boundary you had always held so carefully.
Slowly, he lowered his hand from the doorknob and wrapped his arms around you instead, careful not to cross the boundaries you had set but steady enough to reassure.
You buried your face against his chest, holding on tighter than you thought you could. And in that silent embrace, for the first time in a long time, you realized that maybe, just maybe, you didn’t need to escape anymore.
Not while he was here.
The first few nights in Jeon’s estate had felt unreal.
You remembered lying stiffly in the massive bed the first time he brought you here, your body tense beneath clean sheets that smelled faintly of something warm and unfamiliar. You hadn’t slept much that night, not because of fear, but because comfort had felt suspicious, like something temporary that would disappear if you trusted it too quickly.
But it hadn’t disappeared. And days turned into weeks, weeks into months.
Slowly, without you realizing it at first, the estate stopped feeling like a stranger’s home. It became yours too.
Jeon had given you everything without asking for anything in return.
Clean clothes, soft ones unlike the tight, glittering costumes from the club. Not the uncomfortable fabrics that clung too closely to your skin. These were loose, warm and gentle against your body, soft pants that allowed you to move without feeling watched.
At first, you had hesitated to wear them as they felt too nice, and too undeserved.
But Jeon never commented. Never made you feel like you owed him gratitude for the smallest comforts. He simply placed them in the wardrobe and left you to discover them on your own.
The soft bed had become your favorite place.
At first, you slept at the very edge of it, as far from him as possible, your body turned slightly away, ready to flinch at any unexpected movement. But he never crossed the space between you.
Even when exhaustion dragged him under after long nights away, his body remained still, respectful of boundaries you had never needed to repeat aloud.
Months had passed, and he still hadn’t touched you without permission.
That alone had changed something deep inside you. You appreciated it more than words could express.
And that was the problem. You still hadn’t spoken to him, not truly. Not beyond broken whispers forced out by fear.
Yet every day, he spoke to you like conversation was natural between you. Like silence didn’t bother him, and your presence alone was enough.
He would talk quietly while getting ready in the mornings, adjusting the cuffs of his shirts, straightening his jacket as he explained small details about his day, where he was going, when he would return, who he would be meeting.
You always listened.
Sometimes, when he wasn’t in the room, you practiced saying his name quietly, whispering it into the empty air, shaping the syllables slowly against your lips.
“Jeon…”
Soft, and barely audible. Sometimes you said it again, just to feel what it sounded like resting on your tongue.
You didn’t know when you would say it to him.
But you wanted to. More than anything.
You rarely felt bored inside the estate as there was always something to do, books he had placed in the room, soft music that played faintly through hidden speakers. Sometimes you wandered the halls, your bare feet sinking into thick carpets, curiosity slowly replacing fear.
But even with all of that, you still found yourself waiting.
Waiting for the sound of the front door, his footsteps, waiting for the familiar presence that made the entire house feel warmer.
You didn’t like admitting it to yourself, but you missed him when he was gone.
And tonight, he was later than usual.
You sat curled near the headboard, a book resting forgotten in your lap as your eyes drifted repeatedly toward the door. The room was dim, lit only by the soft glow of a bedside lamp, casting warm shadows across the walls.
Your fingers twisted nervously into the book placed infront of you.
Then, distant footsteps sound as the door opened.
Jeon stepped inside slowly, his movements heavier than usual. His jacket hung loosely from his shoulders, slightly wrinkled, his dark hair messier than you had ever seen it before. There were faint shadows beneath his eyes, and the tension in his posture was unmistakable.
Your chest tightened at the sight. He didn’t notice you at first. He exhaled deeply, the sound low and exhausted as he stepped further into the room.
Jeon walked straight to the bed like he always did after long nights. The mattress dipped slightly as he sat down at the edge, shoulders slumping forward in a way you had never really seen before. Usually, he carried himself with sharp control, every movement precise. Tonight, that control looked worn thin.
That was when you frowned. You pushed yourself upright slowly, the blankets slipping from your shoulders as you moved. The soft fabric of your nightgown settled around you, light against your skin. It was simple, modest, something he had bought months ago without comment, leaving it folded neatly on the bed as if it had always belonged there.
You could tell by the way his head lifted slightly, brows drawing together in quiet confusion when he noticed you sitting up.
For a moment, neither of you spoke.
Then, carefully, you shifted closer.
Your movements were slow, giving him time to pull away if he wanted. but he didn’t. He only watched, quiet curiosity flickering faintly beneath his exhaustion.
You reached for him, fingers brushing lightly against his sleeve first, hesitant. When he didn’t resist, you curled your hand more firmly into the fabric and tugged softly.
Jeon blinked in surprise as you were pulling him toward you.
He let himself move, guided by your hands, his body leaning slightly forward despite the confusion written faintly across his face. He trusted your movements, even without understanding them.
And then, you pressed his head softly against your chest.
The contact startled him as his body went still for a split second, breath catching faintly as he registered what you had done. The warmth of you, the steady rise and fall of your breathing beneath his cheek, the soft fabric of your nightgown brushing lightly against his skin, it all felt unfamiliar in the most disarming way.
You didn’t hesitate as your fingers slid gently into his hair, ruffling through the dark strands slowly, uncertain at first, as if learning the motion as you went.
You continued, slow strokes threading through his hair, hand moving patiently. The tension in his shoulders began to loosen beneath your touch, his breathing gradually evening out as he allowed himself to rest there, against you.
Your fingers kept moving, soothing, a small, quiet offering of comfort. The least you could give him.
Jeon let out a slow breath against your chest, the sound soft and unguarded. His hands rested loosely at his sides at first, as if he didn’t quite know what to do with them, what he was allowed to do in this moment.
You didn’t push him away. So slowly, cautiously, his hands lifted, hovering near your waist for a moment, giving you time to stop him, to remind him of boundaries, but you stayed still.
Carefully, he let his hands settle against your waist, resting there lightly. Your breathing softened as you felt his weight lean more fully into you.
And then, after a long moment of silence, your lips parted. Your heart pounded faintly in your chest, the words forming slowly, clumsily unfamiliar on your tongue, but you tried.
“…tired?” you whispered. the word came out quiet and fragile, barely louder than breath, but clear enough to be understood.
Jeon froze from surprise at the sound of your voice, soft, concerned for him.
He tilted his head slightly, just enough to glance upward, eyes meeting yours for a brief moment. “Yeah,” he murmured quietly, his voice rough with exhaustion. “A little.”
Jeon’s face remained pressed to your chest, his warm breath fanning across the soft swell of your breasts through the thin nightgown.
His mouth brushed lightly against one peaked nipple, the contact sending a quiet shiver through you. He stayed perfectly still, waiting, always waiting for your boundaries.
You didn’t pull away. Instead, your fingers continued their slow, soothing strokes through his dark hair. With the gentlest pressure, you guided his head a fraction closer, your other hand cupping the back of his neck in silent permission.
Jeon’s breath hitched. His lips parted, and he began to suck softly through the fabric, tongue warm and careful as it circled the sensitive peak. There was nothing demanding in it, only a deep, exhausted need for comfort. He suckled slowly, eyes fluttering half closed, a low, broken sound vibrating against your skin.
You let him. Your thumb brushed tenderly over his cheek as you leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to the corner of his cheek, then another to his temple. A faint, barely there smile curved your lips. the first real one he had ever seen from you.
“It’s okay.” you whispered, voice barely audible, soothing.
His eyes opened just enough to look up at you. He had heard your voice so rarely that each whisper, each soft breath of sound felt like something precious. He yearned for it, hungrily and in the quietest way.
Jeon never made you feel foolish for not speaking. Silence with you had never felt like absence to him. it had always felt like waiting for something fragile to bloom in its own time.
It did something dangerous to his heart.
He had never known warmth like this. Never known someone would hold him, let him take comfort from their body without expectation or fear.
He continued sucking softly, mouth gentle and unhurried, cheek resting fully against your breast as he drew quiet comfort from the steady rhythm of your heartbeat and the faint taste of you through the fabric. His hands stayed lightly at your waist, thumbs brushing slow circles, anchoring himself without taking more than you offered.
You kept kissing his cheek between soft coos, fingers never stopping their patient strokes through his hair. The faint smile lingered on your lips as you watched him. this dangerous man, reduced to nothing but quiet vulnerability in your arms.
He had spent months protecting you, erasing every shadow that dared come near. Tonight, you were the one giving him shelter.
Jeon’s sucking gradually slowed, growing lazier and softer as exhaustion finally pulled him under. His lips stayed gently latched, warm and wet against your nipple, breaths deepening into the steady rhythm of sleep while his face remained nestled safely between your breasts.
You held him there, arms wrapped around his broad shoulders, faint smile still ghosting your lips as you continued to stroke his hair long into the night.
In the quiet darkness, with his mouth still softly pressed to you and his heartbeat syncing with yours, the silence felt warmer than it ever had.
The first night after that moment stayed with you. In the quiet way your skin felt warmer than usual, in the strange heaviness that settled low in your stomach whenever you thought about the way Jeon had leaned into you, trusting you enough to rest like that.
And now you craved it in ways that left you restless at night, thighs pressing together when you remembered the weight of his head on your chest, the way his lips had brushed your nipple through the thin fabric, the soft, needy sounds he made while seeking comfort only you could give.
On the nights he returned home angry, jaw tight, eyes sharp with the weight of whatever blood and deals stained his hands, you did the same. You would take his hand without a word and guide him to the bed. He would follow, always, letting you pull him down until his broad frame curled into you. You’d press his face to your chest, fingers sliding into his dark hair, and he would sigh against you like the whole world finally quieted.
It became a habit faster than either of you expected.
He would nuzzle in, lips seeking until they found the soft peak of your nipple through whatever you wore. Then he would suck slowly, with gentle pulls, tongue warm and lazy, eyes fluttering shut as tension bled from his shoulders.
You loved the way his sharp, cold gaze would soften into something doe like and vulnerable when he looked up at you in the middle of it.
This dangerous man.. twice your size, a mafia who erased people without blinking, reduced to quiet need in your arms. It melted something deep inside your guarded heart every single time.
You would stroke his hair, kiss his temple, whisper soft, wordless coos while he suckled. Sometimes your nightgown would slip just enough for his mouth to meet bare skin, and you let him. The soft, wet sounds filled the quiet room intimately vulnerable, and strangely sacred.
You had never allowed hands on your body with anyone, never permitted closeness. Yet with Jeon, you offered solace, even though he was the most dangerous man you knew, because giving it to him made the emptiness in your own chest feel smaller.
But the more he found peace in you, the more you ached.
The absence of his hands on your waist when you weren’t guiding them. The lack of his mouth when he wasn’t tired and seeking solace.
You wanted more.
You wanted him to touch you not just when he was exhausted and seeking comfort, but because he needed you the way you were starting to need him. You wanted his large hands sliding under your clothes with quiet permission. You wanted his mouth on you when you were the one trembling and restless. You wanted to hear that low, rough voice telling you exactly how he was going to take care of you.
Jeon still didn’t touch you unless you guided him. Still respected every boundary without question.
and that was the problem.
You had spent so much of your life feeling touched in ways you hated, forced contact of unwanted hands, suffocating closeness that made your skin crawl.
But Jeon’s touch had never felt like that. His hands had always been gentle.
And now, you missed them. You missed the weight of his head against your chest, missed the warmth of his hands resting lightly at your waist. Missed the quiet way he breathed you in.
It made something inside you ache, a subtle, quiet restlessness. A strange warmth blooming beneath your skin when he stood close to you. The heat of his body when he passed by, the faint scent of him left behind on pillows and clothing.
You noticed everything now, the sound of his voice, the shape of his hands.
And worst of all, you noticed how much you wanted him.
The deep, unfamiliar longing coiled low inside your stomach and refused to fade.
Sometimes, when he wasn’t home, the estate felt too quiet. You found yourself wandering into the bedroom earlier than usual, curling into the bed where his scent lingered faintly in the sheets.
Days passed, and the feeling still didn’t fade. It only deepened.
Until one night, you found yourself alone again.
The house was silent, Jeon had left hours ago, promising to return late like he often did.
You lay on his bed in nothing but a thin nightgown, thighs parted, two fingers buried deep inside your soaked pussy. Your hips rolled desperately as you chased release, mind filled with him, his dark eyes, his large hands, the way he watched you like you were everything.
A soft, broken whimper escaped.
“Jeon…”
You hadn’t heard when the bedroom door opened and Jeon stepped inside.
You lay on his bed, legs spread, fingers still moving and eyes wide with shock as they met his
You whimpered his name again, shyly trying to cover yourself, but your hips twitched restlessly, starved. Your eyes begged him silently, glossy and desperate.
Jeon’s jaw clenched. His cock hardened instantly, thick and heavy. He was just as desperate, but he didn’t trust himself to stay soft if he lost control.
He crossed the room but still didn’t touch you. “Keep going, angel. let me watch.”
You obeyed, shy fingers returning between your legs, rubbing slow circles while your eyes stayed locked on him. But it wasn’t enough. You were too restless, too impatient and your thighs trembling with need.
Jeon sat on the edge of the bed. “Come here.” He guided you gently onto his lap, your back to his chest, thighs spread wide over his. His hard cock pressed against your ass through his slacks. One large hand rested lightly on your stomach, the other hovering just above your pussy, waiting.
“relax, angel,” he murmured against your ear, voice rough. “show me.”
You whimpered restlessly, grinding down against the bulge beneath you. His fingers finally brushed your folds gently, exploring. The moment he tried to press one thick finger inside, you tensed, a small sound of discomfort escaping.
Jeon froze instantly, pulling back. “too much?”
You shook your head quickly, grabbing his wrist, but another attempt made you flinch again.
He cursed softly, then shifted you so you were straddling him, your soaked pussy resting against the hard line of his clothed cock. Both his hands settled on your hips, holding you steady but not forcing.
“Look at me,” he said, voice low and commanding. “How are you going to take my cock, hm? If you can’t even handle one finger?”
You whimpered, hips rolling desperately against him, silently begging. Your hands clutched his shoulders, needy and impatient.
Jeon’s eyes darkened. He reached between you, gently spreading your folds with two fingers, exposing your pussy to his hungry gaze for the first time. His breath hitched.
“Fuck… so pretty,” he groaned quietly, thumb brushing just above your clit. “Been dreaming about this for months. This soft little pussy… all mine.”
You grew shy under his intense stare, trying to close your thighs, but he held them open, firm yet gentle. “Don’t hide from me, angel. Let me see.”
He lowered you onto your back on the bed, then moved between your spread thighs. You were completely exposed to him now, your pretty, glistening pussy on full display.
He leaned in close, hot breath ghosting over your folds. Slowly,he blew a soft stream of air across your sensitive lips, watching with dark fascination as they fluttered and clenched from the cool sensation. A low, hungry sound rumbled in his chest.
His mouth watered at the sight. He couldn’t hold back any longer.
He pressed a slow, open mouthed kiss directly to your pussy, lips soft against your slick folds. Then his tongue dragged through you in one long, hot stripe from your entrance up to your swollen clit, tasting you properly for the first time. The moan that tore from his throat was deep and filthy, vibrating straight against your core.
You gasped sharply, hips jerking hard. The sensation was overwhelming. his warm, wet tongue too much. Instinctively, you tried to close your thighs, tried to squirm away from the intense pleasure, but Jeon’s strong hands gripped tighter, pinning your legs open wide.
He kissed your folds like he was devouring something sacred and soft, wet sounds filling the room as he sucked gently on your clit, then pushed his tongue inside you, fucking you with it in shallow, teasing strokes.
You writhed beneath him, restless and overwhelmed, small desperate whimpers spilling from your lips. Your hands pushed at his shoulders, thighs trembling violently in his iron grip as the pleasure bordered on too much. Every slow lick, every suck, every time his tongue curled inside you sent sparks shooting up your spine. You were so sensitive, so needy after years of nothing, that tears pricked at the corners of your eyes.
Jeon groaned deeply, the taste of you driving him insane. “So fucking sweet… dripping all over my tongue. taste so fucking good for me.”
When your moans grew higher, he finally slid one thick finger inside, careful, curling gently once he was past the initial tightness. This time your body accepted him, clenching around the intrusion while his tongue continued working your clit.
You were dripping, restless, hips lifting impatiently.
Jeon pulled back just enough to look up at you, lips glistening. “That’s it… taking my finger so well now.”
He added a second finger, scissoring slowly, stretching you open while his mouth returned to suck on your clit. The pleasure built fast and overwhelming until you shattered, whimpering his name again and again, thighs shaking around his head
only when you were trembling and boneless did he finally pull back, kissing your inner thighs gently, eyes soft yet burning with possessive need.
Jeon sat up at the corner of the bed, his cock straining painfully against the last barrier of his boxers. He hooked his thumbs into the waistband and shoved them down, freeing his thick, heavy length, the flushed head already glistening with pre cum. He stroked himself once, watching you with dark, hooded eyes.
“Come here, angel,” he murmured, voice low and commanding, dripping with filthy intent.
You obeyed without a word, body still buzzing, crawling across the sheets on shaky limbs until you were between his spread thighs. The sight of his massive cock so close made your mouth water. You had been starved for him for so long.
Without hesitation, you leaned in, lips parting as you took the thick head into your mouth, sucking greedily.
Jeon groaned deep in his chest, one hand gently threading into your hair. “Fuck… that’s it. look at you. Been dreaming about these pretty lips wrapped around me.”
You sucked him deeper, tongue swirling around the head, desperate and eager. Your cheeks hollowed as you took as much as you could, soft whimpers vibrating around his length. He was so big your jaw already ached, but you didn’t stop.
“Good girl,” he praised, voice rough. “Sucking me so sweetly... just like that.”
You moaned around him, sucking harder, one small hand stroking what you couldn’t fit in your mouth. The hunger in your eyes made his cock twitch against your tongue.
After a few minutes, Jeon gently tugged you off, thumb brushing your swollen bottom lip. His gaze was dark but careful.
“Enough, baby. Come up here.” He patted his thighs. “Sit on me. I want you to take it at your own pace. It’s going to stretch you a lot… okay?”
His voice low and serious, eyes searching yours. “You sure this is what you want? we can stop anytime. Tell me it’s okay.”
You nodded, restless and aching, climbing into his lap.
Straddling his thick thighs, you hovered over his massive cock, the blunt head nudging your soaked entrance. You were dripping, thighs slick with your own arousal, but the size still looked impossible.
Jeon’s hands rested lightly on your hips, not pushing, just steadying. “Easy, angel. whenever you’re ready. only if you want it.”
You sank down slowly. The thick head pushed inside, stretching you open with a burning pressure that made you gasp. You only managed a couple of inches before the discomfort bordered on pain. You whimpered, pausing, body trembling as you struggled to take more.
“Fuck… so tight,” Jeon groaned, jaw clenched, fighting the urge to thrust up. “does it hurt, baby? we can stop...”
You shook your head quickly, desperately sinking a little deeper despite the sting. Halfway down and you were already full, barely half his cock inside you, your walls clenching hard around the thick intrusion. The stretch was intense, but the heat and fullness made you even wetter, arousal dripping down his shaft.
Jeon’s hands tightened on your hips, eyes flicking between your face and where you were joined. “breathe for me, baby... you’re doing so good… taking me so well.”
You whined, restless and impatient, trying to push down further but struggling. The pain lingered, sharp and deep.
“Shh, angel. Let me take over now,” he said softly, dominant tone wrapping around you. “I’ve got you.”
He gripped your hips more firmly, holding you steady. With careful, controlled rolls of his own hips, he worked himself deeper, relentless thrusts that pushed another inch, then another. You cried out as the burn intensified, tears pricking your eyes, but you didn’t pull away. You wanted all of him.
“Almost there, baby… just a little more,” he murmured, voice strained with restraint. “you’re clenching so fucking tight around me. Relax for me… let me fill you up.”
With one last gentle but firm push, Jeon sank the rest of his thick cock inside you. The stretch was excruciating at first, pain blooming sharp and hot as your walls were forced to accommodate every inch of his huge length. You whimpered brokenly, feeling impossibly full, like he was splitting you open.
Jeon stilled completely once he bottomed out, buried to the hilt. His hands stroked your back soothingly, voice soft and reassuring even as his cock throbbed inside you.
“There you go… all the way in. You took every inch. Such a good girl for me.” He kissed your temple, staying perfectly still to let you adjust.
Slowly, the burning stretch eased into a heavy, throbbing fullness. Your walls fluttered and clenched around him as the discomfort melted into deep, aching pleasure. Jeon stayed buried deep, hands gentle on your skin, waiting patiently until your whimpers turned into soft, needy sounds and your hips began to move restlessly again.
He could feel the way your sensitive little pussy gripped him so tightly it bordered on painful for both of you.
“Fuck, angel… look at that,” he murmured, voice low. He shifted you carefully, laying you back on the bed and hooking your legs over his elbows, folding you open wider so he could see everything. His dark eyes dropped between your bodies, watching with raw hunger as your slick walls clenched visibly around the base of his cock. “pretty pussy sucking me in so greedily. Clenching like it never wants to let me go.”
You cried out softly, overwhelmed tears slipping down your temples. The stretch was still intense, but the fullness felt too good to stop. Your hips twitched restlessly beneath him.
“Jeon…” you whimpered, voice breaking for the first time again, needy and begging. “more… please…”
The sound of your voice finally saying his name like that hit him like a drug. Jeon’s jaw clenched, eyes darkening with possessive hunger.
He had waited so long to hear you, and now every soft whimper and broken plea made his cock throb harder inside you.
He started slow at first, gentle rolls of his hips, sliding his thick length in and out with careful control, kissing your tear streaked cheeks and murmuring soft praises against your skin. “That’s it, angel. Taking me so well… my good girl.”
But your desperate little whimpers kept fueling him. “More… please...”
Jeon lost control, his hips snapping forward harder, driving his massive cock deep into your tight heat with rough, punishing thrusts. The wet, filthy sound of skin slapping skin filled the room as he fucked you deeper, faster, the head of his cock kissing your cervix with every brutal stroke.
You cried out, tears streaming down your face, but you took every inch, whimpering his name over and over like a prayer.
Jeon loved it. Loved the sound of your voice breaking for him. It drove him wild until he was growling against your neck.
He pounded into you relentlessly, hips slamming against yours, the bed creaking under the force. His thick cock stretched you open again and again, dragging against every sensitive spot inside you as he drove himself deeper.
Jeon was losing control.
After months of never touching you, only watching, only respecting the sacred line you had drawn, the hunger finally broke him.
His hand slid up your body, large palm wrapping around your throat with firm, possessive pressure. Not enough to hurt, but enough to make your breath hitch and your pulse race under his fingers. He held you there, thumb pressing lightly against the side of your neck, feeling every frantic beat of your heart.
One hand slid between your bodies, thumb rubbing tight circles on your swollen clit. The pressure built fast and overwhelming.
Your pussy clenched violently around him, walls fluttering and squeezing so tightly it almost hurt. You came hard, squirting around his cock with a broken cry, clear fluid soaking his abs and the sheets beneath you.
The sight and feel of you falling apart pushed Jeon over the edge as he groaned, voice strained and intense. He buried himself to the hilt, hips stuttering as he released deep inside you, thick ropes of cum flooding your spasming pussy.
Even as he came, he kept kissing you softly, on your lips, your cheeks, your tear damp lashes, whispering affectionate praises between heavy breaths.
“my perfect girl… I love you. So fucking much. You’re mine now… all mine.”
He stayed buried deep, holding you close as both of you trembled through the aftershocks, his cock still twitching inside your cum filled, sensitive pussy.
Jeon’s breathing was ragged, chest heaving against yours. He stayed perfectly still for a long moment, savoring the way your walls fluttered weakly around him. Then his hand came up, large palm cupping your tear streaked face with heartbreaking gentleness. His thumb brushed across your cheek, wiping away the wetness, pulling you closer until your foreheads touched and your breaths mingled.
His dark eyes searched yours, “I don’t want you to call me Jeon anymore,” he whispered, voice hoarse and low, almost trembling with the weight of it. “Not tonight. Not ever again.”
He swallowed hard, thumb stroking your bottom lip as if memorizing the shape of your silence.
“I want you to call me Jungkook.”
The name hung between you like a confession. His eyes were burning with something deeper, something that had been growing since the night you first crashed into him in that dim hallway. Since the first time your fearful, sad eyes had locked onto his across a smoky club and refused to let go.
“I’ve waited so long to hear my name on your lips,” he continued softly, voice cracking. “Every time you danced for me… every time you looked at me like I was the only man in the world… I wanted this. I wanted you to say it like you just did when you were falling apart around me. Like I’m yours.”
He pressed a slow, reverent kiss to your forehead, then to the corner of your eye, tasting the salt of your tears.
“You’re my home now, angel. I’d burn everything down again just to keep you safe… just to keep hearing you whisper my name like that.”
You lay beneath him, still impossibly full of him, body aching in the most delicious, overwhelming way.
Your mind was a quiet storm, confused and unsure of the depth of what you felt for this man who had quietly claimed every piece of your guarded heart without ever forcing his way in.
You didn’t know if this was love yet.
But you knew comfort. you knew home.
You had never known anything like the way he gently held you now, even after he had ruined you so thoroughly, protective even when he was buried to the hilt inside you.
No one had ever made the fear quiet down like this. No one had ever made the sadness feel bearable just by looking at you like you were something precious.
Your fingers trembled as they traced the line of his jaw. You didn’t speak as words still felt too heavy, but your eyes said enough. They stayed locked on his, soft and uncertain, yet warm with the quiet realization that this man had become your safe place.
Jeon smiled, soft and impossibly tender, pressing one last lingering kiss to your lips.
“Stay with me,” he whispered against your mouth, the plea wrapped in velvet and steel. “Let me keep you.”
Jeon’s fingers kept tracing slow patterns along your spine, his breath warm against your temple. The silence between you felt heavier now, full of everything still unsaid.
After a long while, you finally spoke. Your voice was soft, barely above a whisper, hoarse from all the whimpers and moans he had drawn out of you tonight.
“…Jungkook.”
His entire body stilled. The name left your lips like a secret finally set free, hesitant and uncertain, but real. His arms tightened around you instantly, a shaky exhale escaping him as if he had been waiting years just to hear it again.
You didn’t say anything more. You didn’t need to. In that single word, you had given him the only thing you had left to offer, the quiet acknowledgment that he was no longer just the man who watched you from the shadows.
He was yours now, too.
Jeon pressed his forehead to yours, eyes closed, breathing you in like you were oxygen.
The room fell quiet again, filled only with the sound of your mingled breathing and the distant hum of the city beyond the estate walls. He stayed inside you, holding you close, skin to skin, heartbeat to heartbeat.
You still didn’t know if this feeling in your chest was love.
But for the first time in your life, the silence felt like it could hold something beautiful.
Something that might last.
«an: im sorry you guys i actually suck at writing and wrapping up oneshots unless its like atleast 25k words or just pure smut. but mafia jk is so hot i need himmm ugh
when the stoic and devastatingly handsome sir jeon jungkook is appointed as your personal knight, sworn to guard your royal highness with a will forged from steel, you quickly discover that his greatest strength may also be his most infuriating trait, he is utterly immune to you. no matter how tightly you lace your corset, he remains the perfect knight, eyes respectfully averted, jaw set like stone. but while sir jungkook may be a man of steel, you are a princess accustomed to getting what you want, and with every sinful intention of discovering whether even the realm’s most loyal knight could be brought to his knees for you.
⎯⎯ pairing: knight jungkook x princess y/n
warnings: erotica, forbidden medieval fantasy au, porn with plot, age gap, yearning, size difference, oral fixation (f.), unprotected sex, the princess is very horny, cold,dom!knight, bigdick!knight, breeding, pregnancy trope, war brutality, motherhood, subtle angst
word count: 20.5k
The great hall of the royal palace echoed with the murmurs of the assembled court. The King sat upon his throne, his stern gaze sweeping over the line of elite knights who had come to compete for the highest honor in the realm, becoming the personal protector of his only daughter, the princess, you.
The position was coveted for many reasons, but none more obvious than the princess herself.
Beauty had always been your burden as much as your blessing. Tales of it traveled farther than merchants and faster than ravens, crossing borders until even distant courts spoke your name with a mixture of admiration and longing. Princes penned verses in your honor without ever meeting you. Even seasoned knights, men hardened by war and duty, often found themselves disarmed by nothing more than a smile.
With your coronation fast approaching, the kingdom stood on the brink of celebration. It would be the grandest event seen in decades, drawing princes, dignitaries from every corner of the continent. Some would arrive seeking alliances. Most would arrive seeking you.
The prospect amused you more than it excited you.
“Protecting my daughter is not merely a matter of strength,” your father’s voice boomed through the hall. “It demands unyielding discipline and absolute loyalty. You will each face three trials. The princess herself will accompany you, so that you may prove your worth in her presence.”
Your eyes swept slowly across the line of knights standing before the throne, a faint mask of boredom kissing your beautiful face, certain that none of them would truly be able to handle you.
For years, entertaining yourself at the expense of knights had become something of a pastime. A lingering touch against a gauntleted hand, a mere whispered compliment that left disciplined warriors suddenly forgetting their own names. Watching them struggle to maintain their composure was endlessly amusing.
You had notoriously toyed with men like this, living wildly beneath the weight of your royal title, and your father knew this better than anyone. That was precisely why he had designed these trials.
He wasn’t simply looking for the strongest sword arm. He wanted a knight with sharp intellect and the rare ability to withstand your constant attempts to live life on your terms rather than as a perfectly mannered princess.
A small, intrigued smile played on your lips when the first few knights stepped forward. They were impressive in brute force, but you could already tell they would crumble the moment you decided to play.
Then he stepped forward.
Sir Jeon Jungkook.
Even fully armored, with only his dark, piercing eyes visible through the narrow slit of his helmet, once his unflinching gaze met yours for a brief second, a strange spark ignited low in your belly. You tilted your head, studying those dark eyes with growing interest.
The first trial took place that very evening in the smaller banquet hall. Only a select few courtiers were present. You sat at the high table beside your father, sipping from a jeweled goblet.
Unknown to the competing knights, the King had arranged for one of the wine pitchers to be laced with a powerful sleeping draught. Harmless, but potent enough to leave the princess disoriented and vulnerable. Only the King, a few trusted advisors, and the princess herself knew of the plan.
The knights had been given only one instruction: protect the princess. No further details.
As the evening progressed, the effects of the draught began to take hold. Your thoughts grew pleasantly hazy, movements slower. The jeweled goblet nearly slipped from your grasp once before you caught it. A second time, you laughed at something that had not been particularly funny.
Several knights noticed. Some were too busy trying to appear vigilant, eyes constantly scanning the room for imaginary assassins.
A few noticed your condition and drew dangerously close. One insisted on helping you stand despite the fact that you had not asked for assistance. Another rested a hand against your lower back almost inappropriately while guiding you through the room. One knight even smiled when he realized how heavily you leaned upon him after stumbling.
The courtiers watched everything. So did the King.
You were beginning to feel genuinely annoyed when a tall figure stepped silently between you and yet another overeager knight.
Sir Jeon Jungkook.
Unlike the others, he had not hovered around you all evening. He had remained where a royal protector belonged, close enough to intervene, distant enough to respect your space.
Dark eyes studied your face through the narrow opening of his helmet. “The princess has had enough wine,” he declared.
The knight beside you scoffed. “She seems perfectly fin—”
“She does not.”
You watched surprise flicker across the other knight’s face.
Sir Jungkook’s hand briefly closed around your forearm as you swayed, steadying you before immediately letting go the moment your balance returned.
Within moments he had summoned two ladies-in-waiting to accompany you back to your chambers. When another knight offered to carry you himself, Sir Jungkook declined on your behalf before you could even answer.
“Her reputation is as important as her safety.”
For the first time all evening, genuine curiosity stirred within you.
Most men saw opportunity when they looked at you. Some saw beauty, a few saw a future crown. Yet somehow, Sir Jeon Jungkook seemed to see only his duty.
As the ladies guided you toward the doorway, you glanced back over your shoulder.
“How noble of you, Sir Jungkook,” you teased, voice softened by the draught. “Are you always so resistant to temptation?”
His gaze never wavered. “My duty is to protect Your Highness.”
For reasons you could not quite explain, that response lingered in your thoughts far longer than any flirtatious remark ever had.
The final trial was, by all appearances, the simplest.
After weeks of staged attacks, hidden tests, the remaining candidates expected one final demonstration of skill. Some anticipated a duel. Others believed they would be sent to defend the princess from another fabricated threat. Instead, the King announced that the last trial would consist of a single week of personal duty beside the princess. No further explanation was offered.
The knights were disappointed.
You, however, knew exactly what your father was doing.
The trial was not designed to test strength or intelligence. It was designed to test restraint.
Most of the candidates failed within days. Some became overly eager whenever you requested their company.
Others ignored palace protocol the moment you suggested bending the rules. One knight allowed you to wander through the city market without informing the royal guard because he was too eager to please you. Another accepted an invitation to share wine in one of the palace balconies despite knowing perfectly well how improper it appeared. Every failure was carefully observed and quietly recorded.
Only one knight remained infuriatingly impossible.
Sir Jeon Jungkook.
The more you watched him, the more determined you became to discover his weakness. Surely he had one. Everyone did.
At first, your attempts were harmless. During walks through the palace gardens, you lingered beside him instead of remaining ahead as protocol dictated. During meals, you directed most of your conversation toward him. More than once, you deliberately brushed your fingers against the steel of his gauntlet while speaking. Other knights would have turned crimson. Some would have stumbled over their own words.
Sir Jungkook merely stepped aside and continued his duties as though nothing had happened.
Perhaps it was the way every other knight had spent the past weeks attempting to impress you, the King, or the court.
Where others sought favor, he sought only to fulfill his duty. And thus, when the day of the final judgment arrived, the outcome surprised absolutely no one.
Your father rose slowly from his seat.
“Sir Jeon Jungkook,” he declared, voice echoing through the hall. “You have successfully completed all trials. You have shown not only strength and intellect, but the rare ability to anticipate danger and resist… temptation.” His gaze flicked briefly to you. “From this day forward, you are hereby appointed as the princess’s personal royal knight and protector. Guard her with your life. And may the gods help you.”
A murmur rippled through the court.
You turned toward Sir Jeon Jungkook, stepping just close enough that your crimson gown brushed his armor.
“Welcome to my service, Sir Jungkook,” you whispered so only he could hear. “I do hope you’re prepared. Resisting me may prove to be your greatest trial yet.”
His dark eyes held yours with unshakable strength. “I was under the impression I had already passed that one, Your Highness.”
—
Having Sir Jeon Jungkook follow you around all day wasn’t ideal.
It had not even been three months since his appointment as your royal knight, yet his constant, silent presence had already begun to grate on your nerves. He was always a towering shadow in dark armor, never more than a few steps behind. What annoyed you most was his utter lack of reaction.
No matter how boldly you flirted, no matter how you tightened your corset in front of him until your breasts nearly spilled over, no matter how many times you “accidentally” brushed against him, he remained perfectly composed.
What bothered you most of all was that you still had no idea what he looked like. Only those dark, intense eyes visible through the narrow slit of his helmet. The rest of him remained hidden behind steel, a constant, frustrating mystery.
The journey to the neighboring kingdom for the grand alliance celebration had been long and stifling. You rode in the royal ornate covered carriage borne by four strong horses and guarded on all sides. The extravagant gown you wore was beautiful but suffocating, the tight corset pressing against your ribs and making every breath feel like a struggle. Boredom weighed on you like lead.
Your dearest friend, Lady Isolde rode beside you in her own litter. She was to be wed in a month, and the two of you had spent the journey giggling like girls again, whispering behind silk curtains.
“He’s so tall,” Isolde teased, peeking through the gap toward where Sir Jeon Jungkook rode steadily beside your litter. “And those eyes… I wonder what the rest of him looks like under all that steel. Do you think he’s handsome, or just another brute?”
You laughed softly, though your gaze lingered on the narrow slit of Jungkook’s helmet, where those dark, intense eyes remained fixed forward.
“As if,” you replied, laced with mock boredom. “He’s far too proper. I could tighten my corset until my breasts nearly spill, and he wouldn’t even glance.”
Isolde giggled. “You should try. For science.”
Sir Jungkook’s eyes flicked toward the litter for the briefest second before returning forward. You smirked. Annoyed as you were by his constant, unflinching presence… you were also undeniably intrigued.
That night, after the feasting and music had died down and the royal party made camp near the forest’s edge, you slipped away, desperate for even a moment of peace, and determined to test just how far his restraint could stretch.
The air had grown chilly, carrying the faint bite of early autumn as you made your way to the forbidden stretch of the deep bend where the river water ran swift and dangerously deep. No one was permitted here after dark, especially not the princess.
You knew he would follow.
The heavy footsteps of armor soon echoed behind you on the rocky bank.
“Your Highness,” Sir Jungkook’s deep voice rang out, firm. “This area is strictly prohibited at night. The currents are treacherous and the water is far too cold. We must return to the palace at once.”
You barely looked at him. Your eyes were fastened upon the vast expanse of the river, moonlight dancing across its dark surface like scattered diamonds. You wanted nothing more than to feel the cool waves kissing your bare skin, to swim freely under the moon with no eyes judging you in, except his.
A small, unusually kind smile touched your lips as you turned toward him.
“Why don’t you join me, Sir Jungkook?” you asked softly, your voice carrying on the gentle night breeze. “Just for a little while. The water looks so peaceful tonight.”
Sir Jungkook stood like a statue in his dark armor. “Your Highness… that would be highly improper,” he replied, voice low. “I am here to protect you, not to… bathe with you.”
You let out a soft, melodic laugh and began walking toward the river’s edge, the hem of your gown brushing the grass.
“Well, I suppose then…” you bit your lip, your fingers moving to the laces of your gown with aching slowness. “I shall swim, and you will stand guard like the loyal knight you are.”
You could feel his intense eyes watching through the narrow slit of his helmet as you loosened the ties. The rich fabric slid from your shoulders like liquid silk, pooling at your feet.
Completely bare under the moonlight, you wore nothing beneath. Your skin glowed luminous and your full breasts rose and fell with each breath, nipples already stiff from the cold night air. The curve of your waist flared into soft hips, and the smooth, delicate skin between your thighs was on full display.
Sir Jungkook immediately turned his head sharply away, staring fixedly into the dark trees.
“Your Highness!” His voice was strained. “This is highly inappropriate. I cannot allow—”
“You don’t have to allow anything,” you cut him off, dripping with defiance. “You’re not permitted to touch me while I’m bare. So you’ll just have to stand there.”
You waded into the river with a soft gasp. The icy water bit into your skin, but the thrill of rebellion pushed you forward. You swam out deeper, the cold making your body hypersensitive.
You glanced back at the bank. Sir Jungkook stood like a statue, head turned away, refusing to look at your naked form even once. His armored fists were clenched tightly at his sides.
A thrill of satisfaction ran through you.
You felt exhilarated. Free. And wickedly aware that the most disciplined man in the kingdom was standing on the bank, fighting not to look at you.
“Are you really going to stand there all night, Sir Jungkook? The water feels wonderful… and I’m all alone out here.” You swam further out, the cold water caressing every inch of your bare skin. A soft, content sigh escaped your lips.
It would be a plain lie if you said you weren’t at least a little relieved that he had followed you. The deep bend was no joke. its treacherous currents and deadly depth were feared even by The King. Yet here you were, aching to tear down the walls of the knight who refused to bend to your charms.
You floated lazily on your back, letting the moonlight kiss your bare skin. Then, with a mischievous glint in your eyes, you took your chance.
Once a subtle current tugged at your legs, you gasped dramatically, flailing your arms and letting out a soft, helpless cry. “Oh—!”
You fought back a giggle, pretending to be a damsel in distress, knowing the current wasn’t strong enough to truly endanger you. You wanted to see if you could finally crack his composure.
But the gods had other plans.
Without warning, a far more treacherous undercurrent slammed into you like a living beast. It dragged you under violently, twisting your body, filling your mouth and nose with icy water. Real panic surged through you as you lost your breath and sight in the black depths.
“Jungkook!” you screamed, the sound barely coherent as water rushed into your lungs. This time, it was no act.
Sir Jeon Jungkook did not hesitate for even a fraction of a second. He plunged into the river fully armored, cutting through the violent current with powerful strokes. His strong arms wrapped around your waist, yanking your naked body against his steel chest as he fought the river with raw, expert strength. You clung to him desperately, coughing and gasping as he dragged you back to the rocky bank.
The moment he pulled you ashore, his helmet caught on a low hanging branch and was ripped clean off.
You lay on the grass, gasping for air, when your eyes finally focused on the man hovering above you.
And you forgot how to breathe.
Sir Jeon Jungkook was devastatingly, unfairly handsome.
Wet raven black hair clung to his forehead and sharp, sculpted cheekbones. Water droplets traced the strong line of his jaw and dripped from sensual lips. His dark eyes, now fully exposed, were intense and beautiful, framed by long lashes and thick brows. A faint scar graced his left eyebrow, adding a rugged edge to his otherwise perfect masculine beauty.
Before you could speak, he swiftly grabbed his crimson cloak and draped it over your naked body, covering you completely with careful reverence. His gaze remained locked strictly on your face, never once drifting to your exposed skin.
“Are you okay, Your Highness?” he asked, voice rough with concern. A faint blush colored his cheeks as he noticed the way you were staring at his now-bare face.
You opened your mouth to speak, but no words came. The combination of the dangerous current, the shock of nearly drowning, and the overwhelming sight of your knight’s true face left you dizzy and speechless.
Your vision blurred. You passed out in his arms.
Sir Jungkook pulled you closer against his armored chest, one large hand gently brushed your wet hair away from your face, his touch surprisingly tender. He lifted you effortlessly, cradling you like a warrior carrying his lady, your head resting against his broad shoulder, body wrapped securely in his cloak, legs draped over his arm as he carried you back to his mare.
He mounted carefully, keeping you nestled safely against him as the horse began the journey back to the palace through secret paths.
You woke briefly as he laid you down on the thick rug before the hearth in your royal chambers. The fire was already roaring. You were still wrapped in his cloak, beneath it only a thin silk bandeau now clung to your body, the delicate material barely containing your breasts, pressing them together in a deep, soft cleavage that rose and fell with each shaky breath.
You trembled from the cold and the lingering shock of the river.
Sir Jeon Jungkook remained kneeling by the fire, his movements precise as he stoked the flames. Water dripped from his raven hair onto his armoured shoulders. Then he rose to his full, imposing height, towering, broad shouldered.
Without a word, he reached for his helmet, which rested upon a nearby oak chest, clearly intending to conceal his face once more.
“No,” you whispered, your voice soft yet commanding as you pushed yourself up on one elbow. “Do not put it back on.”
The knight paused, gloved hand hovering above the helm. His dark eyes met yours, intense and conflicted.
“Your Highness… it is not fitting for me to stand before you unveiled,” he said, his voice carrying the formal cadence of a sworn knight. “I must maintain the dignity of my position.”
You sat up fully, the cloak slipping slightly from one shoulder, revealing the smooth curve of your skin and the edge of the silk bandeau. Despite the cold still clinging to your bones, warmth bloomed low in your belly as you gazed upon his face, truly beheld it for the first time.
“Come closer,” You rose to your knees on the rug, the cloak parting further as you reached for him. “Let me see you properly.”
He hesitated, every line of his powerful frame taut with restraint. Yet he obeyed, lowering himself once more to kneel before you. Even on his knees, he remained nearly at your eye level, so tall and broad was he.
You lifted a delicate hand and brushed your fingers through his damp raven locks, pushing them back from his forehead. A contented sigh escaped your lips.
“You are far too pleasing to look upon, Sir Jungkook,” you whispered, almost in awe. “I had wondered what lay beneath that steel. Never did I imagine such a face.”
Sir Jungkook remained perfectly still on his knees before you. His hands rested tensely on his armoured thighs as he fought to keep his gaze fixed on your face and not the way your breasts strained against the thin silk bandeau.
“You flatter me, Your Highness,” he replied, voice low. “But I am your knight. Nothing more. Please allow me to restore my helmet.”
You shook your head slowly, refusing to let him hide again. Instead, you leaned closer, your fingers still buried in his damp raven hair.
A new, overwhelming wave of admiration and obsession washed over you. This man... this mature, hardened, breathtakingly handsome knight was kneeling before you like a devotee. The realization sent a fresh rush of heat between your thighs.
“You’re older than me, aren’t you?” you murmured softly, continuing to caress his hair with gentle strokes. “Hardened by battles and years I haven’t yet seen.”
You wondered how many more scars he carried beneath that heavy armor hidden across his broad chest, his strong back.
“I am twenty eight, Your Highness,” he answered quietly, his deep voice carrying that disciplined tone you were growing addicted to.
“Tell me something personal,” you said, your voice turning playful yet curious. Your fingers trailed from his hair down to trace his cheekbone once more. “Have you ever been with a woman, Sir Jeon? Truly been with one?”
His jaw tightened visibly. The question crossed every boundary a knight was sworn to respect.
“Your Highness… such questions are not appropriate for me to answer,” he replied. You leaned in even closer, still stroking his hair tenderly, your breath brushing against his skin.
“But I want to know,” you whispered. “Have you ever touched a woman the way a man touches a lover? Ever kissed one?”
Jungkook’s breathing grew slightly heavier. His dark eyes stayed locked on yours with iron discipline, though you could clearly see the storm brewing behind them.
“I have not, Your Highness,” he finally answered, voice low and honest. “My duty has always come first.”
A thrill ran through you at his confession. You let your fingers drift lower, brushing along his sharp jawline. “And if a woman wanted you… desperately?” your voice dropped to a near whisper. “If she wanted your mouth between her thighs… your tongue tasting her, would you deny her?”
The impure question hung heavy in the air between you. You shocked even yourself with how boldly it slipped out, but the vivid image, his devastatingly handsome face trapped between your legs, mouth glistening with your arousal made the heat bloom even more slick between your thighs.
Sir Jungkook’s hands clenched tighter on his armored thighs. A faint flush colored the tips of his ears and neck, but he remained on his knees.
“Your Highness,” he said, reverently, “I am sworn to protect you. Not to… indulge in such thoughts.”
You smiled softly. Then you leaned back on the bed, letting the crimson cloak fall open completely. The thin silk bandeau was the only thing left covering you, and even that felt too much now.
“Then I command you,” You looked down at him, this powerful knight on his knees before you, and felt a rush of pure need. “I want your mouth on me, Jungkook. Right now.”
“Your Highness, I—”
“Touch me,” you breathed, cutting him off. “Please, Jungkook…”
You reached down and grabbed his gloved hand, bringing it to your chest. Slowly, you pressed his large palm over the thin silk bandeau, letting him feel the soft, heavy weight of your breast. Your nipple was already painfully hard beneath the fabric.
Sir Jungkook’s breath hitched sharply. His entire body tensed, the muscles in his arm flexing under the armor as he fought against every instinct.
You didn’t stop there, dragging his hand lower, sliding it down your stomach until his fingers rested between your thighs. You were soaked. your petals slick and hot against his gloved fingers.
“Feel how damp you make me,” you whispered, voice shaking with need.
Sir Jungkook let out a low, strained groan. His dark eyes were fixed on your face, but you could see the violent war happening behind them.
The most beautiful woman he had ever laid eyes on — the princess, the future queen, was laid out before him in nothing but a flimsy silk bandeau, legs spread, pressing his hand against her dripping cunt.
“Your Highness…” he rasped, albeit desperate. “This is beyond forbidden. You are royalty. I am sworn—”
“I don’t care,” you whimpered, grinding slowly against his gloved fingers. “I need you. I’ve never felt this way before. Touch me now, my knight. Please.”
His hand trembled. For a long moment, he simply rested there, feeling your wetness soak through the leather of his glove. Then, with a broken exhale that sounded like surrender, his fingers moved.
He stroked along your soaked folds, parting the delicate petals of your most secret flower. And what a flower it was... a lush, glistening rosebud blooming only for him. Your outer lips were soft and swollen with need, flushed deep, delicate like the first blush of dawn.
As he gently spread you open, the inner petals revealed themselves: silky, and impossibly tender, layered like the finest rose in full bloom after a summer rain. At the center lay your sweetest nectar, dripping and honeyed, flowing abundantly from your aching entrance.
The knight didn’t know what came over him, but your pulsing heat and slick, puckering folds had him utterly entranced. His breathing grew ragged. You could see the way his throat worked, the way his tongue unconsciously darted out to wet his lips. He was drooling.
“May I lick you, Your Highness?” he asked hoarsely, voice thick with barely contained hunger. “Please… allow me to taste you.”
The desperate plea from such a disciplined man sent a fresh wave of arousal flooding through you.
“Yes,” you breathed, spreading your thighs wider for him, your voice trembling with raw need. “Use your mouth on me, Jungkook. Lick your princess until she cannot think.”
The moment the words left your lips, something in him broke. Sir Jungkook leaned in and dragged his hot, wet tongue slowly up your soaked slit. The first full taste of you pulled a deep, guttural groan from his chest. You were intoxicatingly sweet and dripping with arousal. He licked you again, slower this time, savoring every slick fold as if he were drinking the finest wine in the kingdom.
You cried out sharply, back arching off the bed as overwhelming pleasure flooded your body. The sensation was brand new, so intense it made your legs twitch violently.
“Oh... Jungkook!” you moaned, fingers digging into his raven hair.
The knight’s tongue circled your swollen clit before sucking it gently into his mouth, then plunged inside your tight heat, ravishing you with slow, deep strokes. The wet, filthy sounds of his mouth eagerly eating you echoed through the chamber, obscene, and shameless.
The most beautiful woman he had ever known, the future queen, was thrashing beneath him, legs shaking uncontrollably around his head, soft whimpers and loud moans spilling from her pretty lips.
Your hips rolled desperately against his face, coating his tongue, lips, and chin with your sweet release. Sir Jungkook drank every drop you gave him, groaning against your cunt as his own cock strained painfully against his armor.
He had never tasted anything so addictive.
You were already twitching, gasping, legs trembling so hard they threatened to close around his head. The pleasure was too much, too new, too overwhelming for your body.
Suddenly, Sir Jungkook pulled back slightly, his lips glistening with your juices. His dark eyes looked up at you, breathing ragged.
“Should I continue, Your Highness?” he asked hoarsely, voice thick with lust and devotion. “Tell me… do you want more?”
You could barely form words. Your body was shaking, pussy throbbing, dripping onto the mattress beneath you.
“Please don’t stop,” you whimpered desperately. “Keep licking me... please...”
The knight obeyed instantly. He buried his face back between your thighs and attacked your clit with relentless strokes of his tongue. Two thick fingers pushed inside you, curling perfectly against that sensitive spot while he sucked hard on your swollen pearl.
The pleasure hit you like a storm.
Your entire body seized up. A loud, broken scream tore from your throat as your orgasm crashed over you violently. Your thighs clamped around his head, hips bucking wildly against his mouth as you gushed on his tongue. Wave after wave of intense pleasure ripped through you, leaving you shaking uncontrollably, vision blurring at the edges.
You nearly passed out from the sheer intensity of it. body twitching, chest heaving, soft cries still falling from your lips as the pleasure refused to let go.
Sir Jungkook stayed between your thighs through every tremor, drinking down every last drop of your release like a man who had finally found salvation.
When your body finally went limp, trembling and oversensitive, he gently kissed your inner thigh before pulling back, his handsome face flushed and glistening with your arousal.
You could barely speak, still catching your breath as you stared at the sight of your proud, disciplined knight with your release shining on his lips.
—
“The Princess requires her knight’s escort to the eastern tower for stargazing.”
The message was innocent enough on paper. But the court had begun to notice how often you summoned Sir Jeon Jungkook for these private “duties.” Some whispered that the Princess trusted no one else. Others envied the knight who had earned such unwavering favor from the realm’s greatest beauty.
They had no idea what really happened once the tower door was bolted.
In the eastern tower under the stars, you would push Sir Jungkook against the cold stone wall and demand his mouth on you again. He always hesitated at first, “Your Highness, we mustn’t…” but the moment you looked at him with those wide, needy eyes and whispered “Please, Jungkook… I ache for you,” his resolve crumbled.
He would drop to his knees in full armor, push your skirts up to your waist, and bury his face between your thighs. The sounds he made while devouring you were filthy and desperately loud. wet slurps and deep groans as he drank every drop of your arousal. You quickly learned to muffle your loud moans against your own arm or his shoulder, thighs shaking violently around his head as he brought you to shattering orgasm after orgasm.
He never asked for anything in return at first. But one night, after he had made you come so hard you saw stars, you dropped to your knees in front of him, hands trembling as you freed his thick, aching cock from his breeches.
You had never seen the knight fully bare, but you had tasted him.
You took him into your mouth with clumsy but eager hunger, sucking and licking until he was groaning your name like a prayer, his gloved hand gently cradling the back of your head. When he spilled down your throat, you swallowed every drop, looking up at him with wide, adoring eyes.
The tension between you only grew hotter, more forbidden.
You began creating excuses just to be close to him.
You “accidentally” wandered into dangerous parts of the forest during hunts. You “lost” your way in the palace corridors at night. You deliberately teased foreign dignitaries until they grew too bold, all so Sir Jungkook would have to step in, pull you protectively against his armored chest, and hold you there while scolding you with his low voice.
Each time, you nestled your head against his chest plate, breathing in his scent, feeling safe in a way you had never felt with anyone else.
One quiet afternoon in the royal rose gardens, while the other knights kept their distance. The summer blooms were at their peak, rows upon rows of crimson roses spilling over marble trellises in a riot of color and fragrance. Courtiers often compared them to you. You had heard the comparison so many times throughout your life that it had long since lost all meaning.
Your attention was elsewhere when Sir Jungkook paused beside a rose bush heavy with crimson blooms. Reaching out, he selected a single flower and turned it thoughtfully between his fingers before approaching.
“A gift?” you asked.
“If Your Highness would accept it.”
The answer surprised a smile from you.
He stepped forward and tucked the rose behind your ear. His gloved fingers lingered only for a second before withdrawing, but even that brief touch seemed to affect him more than he wished to admit.
When you looked up, his gaze was fixed upon the flower. “Beautiful things are dangerous,” he said quietly.
You laughed. “I believe roses are dangerous for everyone except gardeners.”
His expression didn’t change.
“I wasn’t speaking about the rose.”
Your heart fluttered so violently you had to look away. it was becoming impossible to deny how deeply you were falling for him.
The kisses grew sloppier, more desperate with every stolen moment.
In the abandoned library, your knight would press you against the bookshelves, helmet removed, and kiss you like he was drowning, tongue sliding against yours, hands gripping your waist as if afraid you might vanish. You kissed him back just as hungrily, tugging at his hair, moaning softly into his mouth while your hand palmed the hard bulge in his breeches.
Your hunger for him was insatiable. You ached for his presence constantly. The court noticed how you lit up when he entered a room, how you instinctively moved closer to him during gatherings. They saw devotion, they saw trust.
They never saw the way you both held each other’s eyes like lovers who knew their time was stolen.
The relationship was utterly forbidden. Your father would banish him, or worse, if he ever discovered the truth. But neither of you could stop. Something real was blossoming between you.
The knight admired your wild, rebellious spirit. You admired his quiet strength and unwavering honor. In the darkness, you were no longer just princess and knight. You were becoming each other’s secret salvation. And it was only a matter of time before the tension finally snapped.
—
The Coronation.
The kingdom was in full celebration. Banners of the finest gold flew from every tower. The greatest event in decades had arrived, your coronation as Queen.
Princes from across the realms had come in droves, each more eager than the last to win your hand and the throne beside you. They brought lavish gifts, performed in grand tournaments, and showered you with compliments. The entire court watched with bated breath, waiting for you to choose.
You sat upon the raised dais in a breathtaking gown of white, looking every bit the ethereal queen-to-be. But your eyes kept drifting to the tall, armored figure standing silently behind your throne, Sir Jeon Jungkook.
He had become even more composed in public, yet you could feel the storm raging beneath his helmet. Especially when you decided to play your cruel little game.
Prince Min of Veina leaned close during the feast, whispering sweet nothings about your beauty. You laughed brightly, placing a hand on his arm, letting your fingers linger, leaning in just enough for your neckline to offer him a generous view of your breasts.
From the corner of your eye, you saw Sir Jungkook’s gloved hand tighten around the hilt of his sword until his knuckles turned white.
Another prince, a golden haired lord from the eastern isles, offered you a rose during the garden promenade. You accepted it with a coy smile, twirling it between your fingers while glancing toward your knight.
Sir Jungkook’s dark eyes burned behind the helmet. You could feel his jealousy like a living thing, hot and barely contained.
That night, after the feasting and dancing, you summoned him to the eastern tower under the usual pretense.
The moment the door closed, he was on you.
The knight pinned you against the cold stone wall. The single rose you’d been idly twirling between your fingers, a gift from one of the many princes, fell forgotten to the floor.
Sir Jungkook’s dark eyes burned with something almost feral.
“You will be wed off soon?” he growled dangerously, breath hot against your ear.
You looked up at him, heart racing. Your long, wavy hair had finally been let down after the long day, cascading over your shoulders and hips like dark silk. The tight corset of your white coronation gown was already loosened, the fabric slipping slightly off one shoulder, revealing the smooth curve of your skin.
“What do you think about Prince Min?” you asked sweetly, tilting your head. “I think he’s quite lovely. So charming. He even said he would worship me every night once we’re wed.”
Sir Jungkook’s jaw clenched so hard you heard it crack. The jealousy that had been simmering all day threatening to explode.
“Doesn’t it drive you mad, Sir Jeon?” You leaned in closer, letting your breasts brush against his armored chest. “Knowing your princess, the one you’ve been secretly devouring every night, is wanted by so many powerful men? That they all dream of putting a ring on my finger and taking me to their beds?”
“It is exquisite torture, Your Highness,” he growled, eyes burning. “Watching them look at you like they have any right to you. Knowing I’m the only one who’s ever tasted you, the only one who’s ever made you scream.”
His raw honesty sent a sharp thrill through you. You bit your lip, loving the way jealousy sharpened his features, making his dark eyes appear even more intense. He was possessive and barely holding himself back. And you wanted to push him further.
You stepped away from the wall with a teasing smile, walking over to the tall, gilded mirror that stood near the fireplace. The white gown still clung to your body, hair cascading in long, wild waves down your back. You picked up a silver brush and began slowly running it through it, watching him in the reflection.
Sir Jungkook followed you like a shadow, stopping just behind you. His tall, powerful frame loomed in the mirror, twice your size, radiating heat and restrained fury.
“Does that bother you, my knight?” A teasing smile played on your lips. “Knowing that soon I might have to let another man—”
You didn’t get to finish. Sir Jungkook’s large hand closed around your wrist, stopping the brush mid stroke. He plucked it from your fingers and set it down with a deliberate clack. His other hand gripped your hip, pulling your back flush against his armored chest.
Your breath hitched. The playful boldness you’d been wielding all night vanished in an instant.
“Enough,” he growled low against your ear, “You’ve teased me enough tonight, Your Highness.”
His dark eyes burned into yours through the mirror. The intensity there made your knees weak. This wasn’t the restrained, obedient knight anymore. This was a man who had finally reached his limit.
He reached around you and slowly began unlacing the rest of your corset. The white gown loosened further, slipping down your shoulders. You watched in the mirror as he tugged it lower, exposing your full breasts to the cool air and the warm firelight. Your nipples were hard, flushed, and sensitive.
Sir Jungkook’s hand cupped one breast possessively, squeezing it as his thumb brushed over the stiff peak. You gasped, arching into his touch.
“Look at yourself,” he ordered quietly, voice rough. “Look how beautiful you are. How perfect. And yet you let them think they could ever have this.”
He pinched your nipple, rolling it between his fingers until you whimpered. His other hand slid down, gathering the fabric of your gown and pulling it up to your waist, fully exposing your bare cunt in the mirror.
Your face bloomed bright red as you instinctively tried to close your legs, suddenly overwhelmed with shyness at the sight of yourself so lewdly displayed, flushed and completely bare in the golden firelight.
But Sir Jungkook wouldn’t allow it. His large hand gripped your thigh firmly, spreading you open again as he pressed his body harder against your back.
“Don’t hide,” His dark eyes met yours in the mirror, intense and commanding. “Look how filthy and wet you are for me.”
You shivered, unable to tear your eyes away from the reflection. The contrast was obscene, your ethereal white gown bunched around your waist, breasts exposed and heaving, legs spread wide while his armored body loomed behind you like a dark, possessive shadow.
Sir Jungkook’s hand returned between your thighs. Two thick fingers slid through your slick folds, parting them slowly so you could see everything in the mirror. You whimpered at the sight, embarrassed yet unbearably aroused.
“So beautiful,” he breathed as he circled your swollen clit with his fingertip. “This is what belongs to me. Not to any prince. Not to anyone else.”
He pushed two fingers inside you without warning, curling them deep. Your mouth fell open in a silent cry as he began ravishing you with slow, deliberate strokes that made wet, obscene sounds echo in the quiet tower.
You tried to close your legs again, overwhelmed, but he held them open with ease, his grip firm and unyielding.
“Watch,” he ordered softly, voice dark with lust. “Watch how easily I can make my princess fall apart.”
Your eyes stayed glued to the mirror as his fingers plunged in and out of your soaked cunt, his thumb rubbing tight circles on your clit. Your cheeks were flushed deep crimson, lips parted in shameless moans, breasts bouncing slightly with every thrust of his hand.
The pleasure built fast and merciless. Your legs started shaking, thighs trembling violently as you fought to stay upright.
Sir Jungkook’s fingers curled deeper, stroking that perfect spot inside you while his thumb pressed firm circles on your swollen clit.
You came hard with a broken cry, arousal gushing down his wrist and dripping onto the stone floor beneath you. Your head fell back against his armored shoulder, body convulsing as wave after wave of intense pleasure tore through right after.
The knight dragged his arousal coated fingers from your pulsing heat and brought them to his mouth, sucking them clean while his dark eyes stayed locked on yours in the mirror. The obscene sight made you whimper, legs pressing together instinctively. This time, he allowed it.
You pulled away from him shyly, legs unsteady as you walked toward the wide couch near the fireplace. You crossed your arms over your chest, trying to cover your bare breasts, suddenly overwhelmed with embarrassment.
Sir Jungkook approached you ever so slowly. His heart was pounding. you could see it in the rise and fall of his broad chest. The way your flushed cheeks and shy posture made you look so adorable only made his desire burn hotter.
He stopped in front of you, towering over your smaller frame. Without a word, he gently uncrossed your arms, exposing your breasts again. You tried to cover them once more, but he caught your wrists softly.
“You’re too beautiful to hide, my love.” he murmured, voice low.
He leaned down and took one sensitive nipple into his hot mouth, sucking gently at first, then harder. You gasped sharply, hands flying to his shoulders as overwhelming sensitivity shot through you.
“Jungkook... it’s too much...” you whimpered, lightly pushing at his shoulders, cheeks burning with shyness.
He pulled back just enough to look at you, eyes dark with lust and affection. “You’re so sensitive here,” he whispered, almost in awe. He flicked his tongue over your nipple again, watching your reaction closely. “So angelic when you tremble like this.”
He sucked harder, alternating between your breasts, licking and biting softly until you were a whimpering mess, pushing at him weakly while your body arched into his mouth.
You grew frustrated at the unfairness, nearly naked while he was still fully armored. With a small, determined huff, you pushed him back slightly and began tugging at the straps of his armor.
“It is not fair,” you muttered, cheeks still flushed. “You get to see all of me, but I still haven’t seen you.”
The knight let you undress him, helping you remove piece after piece until he stood completely bare before you for the first time.
Your breath caught.
He was magnificent. Broad shoulders, powerfully sculpted chest marked with old scars, some long and faded, others newer. A few dark tattoos adorned his left pectoral and ribs. His abdomen was ridged with muscle, leading down to narrow hips. His cock hung heavy between his legs, thick and already hard.
You stepped closer, running your hands over his bare chest, tracing every scar with reverent fingers, exploring the strong lines of his back, more scars mapping his battles. He stood perfectly still, letting you admire him, though his breathing had grown heavier.
“You are… so manly, my knight,” you breathed, barely coherent, as your hands returned to his chest, sliding down the hard ridges of his abdomen. “So big… so perfect.”
The room had grown hotter, heavier. The air between you felt charged with months of suppressed longing. Your breaths mingled as you stared into each other’s eyes... yours wide with awe and desire, his dark with barely restrained hunger.
Sir Jungkook’s control finally snapped. He lifted you and laid you down on the wide couch near the fireplace, pinning your exploring hands above your head with one large hand, holding them there firmly before his body hovered over yours, powerful and imposing, thick cock resting heavy against your inner thigh.
“Look at me,” he commanded, voice low and rough.
You did, heart hammering.
“Tell me what you want,” he demanded, eyes burning into yours.
You squirmed beneath him, aching and desperate. “Take me,” you pleaded, trembling. “Please, Jungkook… give it to me. I need you inside me.”
Sir Jungkook let out a low groan at your words. He positioned himself at your entrance, the thick head of his cock pressing against your soaked folds. He was big, almost intimidatingly so. You felt the stretch even before he pushed in.
“I don’t want to hurt you, Your Highness,” he whispered, voice strained with worry and barely contained lust. His dark eyes searched yours, torn between desire and restraint. “You’re so tight...”
You trembled beneath him, legs parted wide around his hips. “Please,” you begged softly, cupping his face. “Don’t hold back. I need you. All of you.”
The knight exhaled shakily and began to push inside.
The stretch was intense. You gasped sharply as the thick head of his cock breached you, slowly forcing your walls open. Inch by thick inch, he sank deeper, filling you in a way you had never experienced before. It burned sweetly, bordering on too much, making your nails dig into his shoulders.
“Ah... Jungkook…” you whimpered, tears pricking your eyes at the overwhelming fullness.
He paused halfway, breathing hard, jaw clenched tight. “Tell me if it’s too much,” he rasped, rough. “I’ll stop. I swear it.”
But you shook your head, wrapping your legs around his waist.
“Don’t stop,” you pleaded, voice breaking. “I need you deeper… please.”
With a low groan, he pushed the rest of the way in, burying himself to the hilt. The fullness was devastating. You felt so stretched, so completely claimed, that for a moment you could barely breathe.
Sir Jungkook stayed still, letting you adjust, pressing soft kisses to your tear stained cheeks.
“You’re taking me so well,” he murmured, voice filled with awe and lust. “Such a good girl for me.”
When the burn finally melted into aching pleasure, you rolled your hips experimentally.
“Move,” you whispered. “Please… ruin me.”
That was all it took.
Sir Jungkook’s control snapped completely. He pulled back and thrust into you hard, setting a deep, punishing rhythm. Jealousy and months of pent up desire fueled every powerful stroke. The wet, filthy sound of his thick cock slamming into your soaked cunt filled the tower, mixing with your loud, broken moans.
He was a knight sworn to protect the crown, now utterly ruining the very sovereign he had pledged his life to shield.
“Mine,” Sir Jungkook growled, biting down on your neck hard enough to leave a dark mark. “Not theirs. Never theirs.”
He ravished you relentlessly, claiming you, marking you. His mouth was everywhere: sucking bruises into your breasts, biting your collarbone, licking the tears from your cheeks. He pinned your wrists above your head again, hips snapping against yours with raw need.
You came hard the first time, screaming his name as your walls clenched violently around his thick length. But he didn’t stop. He took you through it, then flipped you onto your hands and knees, on the wide couch.
First, he worshipped.
The knight dropped to his knees behind you, his large hands spreading your cheeks reverently. He leaned in and pressed slow, open mouthed kisses along the curve of your royal backside, lingering presses of his lips that made your breath hitch. He kissed lower, then lower still, until his tongue dragged hot and wet over your soaked folds from behind.
“So beautiful,” he murmured against your skin, breath hot and heavy. “So divine. And yet I am going to ruin every sacred inch of you.”
Then the worship turned into ruin.
He rose, gripping your hips with white knuckled force, and thrust into you from behind in one deep, devastating stroke. You cried out sharply at the stretch, the thick length of his cock forcing your walls open, filling you so completely it stole your breath.
You sobbed in pleasure, fingers clawing at the cushions as he drove into you relentlessly. The power he exerted over you was intoxicating. this hardened warrior, dominating you utterly while still worshipping every tremble of your body.
“You belong to me,” he rasped, ruining you with slow, devastating strokes now. “Say it.”
“I’m yours,” you whimpered, voice breaking. “Only yours, Jungkook... ahh!”
By the third round, you were a sobbing, whimpering mess, tears streaming down your face from overwhelming pleasure, body covered in his marks, cunt swollen and dripping with your combined release.
He took you in every way he could: against the wall, bent over the couch, riding him as he sat on the edge of the seat, then finally on your back again with your legs over his shoulders as he drove impossibly deep.
All night long, the tower echoed with your moans, his deep groans, the obscene wet sounds of your bodies joining. He claimed you utterly and completely devoted.
When he finally came for the last time, buried deep inside you, he held you tight, spilling pulse after pulse of hot seed into your womb, filling you until you felt impossibly full, claimed from the inside out.
Sir Jeon Jungkook pressed his forehead to yours, his lips brushing against yours with every word.
“You command the entire kingdom, my lady,” he whispered reverently, “but here in this hidden place… you are mine to ruin.”
You could only tremble in his arms, utterly spent, legs wrapped around his waist, heart pounding wildly as the fire crackled beside you.
The weight of what you had just done, and what it meant for both of you settled uncomfortably in the air. But in that moment, wrapped in his powerful arms, marked and filled by your knight, nothing else in the kingdom mattered.
The days that followed were a delicate illusion of peace.
It was late morning when you found yourself in the secluded royal bathing pool fed by a gentle river, surrounded by floating lily pads and white blossoms that drifted lazily on the current. The water was warm, scented with rose and lavender oils poured in by your maids. Sunlight filtered through the overhanging willow branches, casting soft, dappled light across the surface.
You leaned back against the smooth stone edge, your long dark hair floating around you like ink in water. Your body still carried the secret marks of the previous night, faint bruises on your hips, love bites hidden beneath the waterline, and a persistent, delicious ache between your thighs that reminded you with every shift who had claimed you so thoroughly.
Your maids, Elara, Verra, and old, wise Selyse moved around you carefully. They had raised you since you were a babe, more mothers than servants. They knew you better than anyone.
Elara poured another stream of warm water over your shoulders, her sharp eyes catching the faint flush that still lingered on your cheeks.
“You are glowing again this morning, my lady,” she said lightly, a knowing smile tugging at her lips. “One might think the moon itself had kissed your skin.”
Verra, younger and bolder, laughed softly as she massaged oil into your scalp. “Or perhaps a certain tall, dark eyed knight has been keeping you… well attended.”
You felt your face heat, but you couldn’t stop the small, secret smile that curved your lips.
Selyse, the eldest, clicked her tongue but her eyes were soft with affection. “Hush, you two. Our princess has always been radiant. Though…” she tilted her head, studying you, “there is a new light in her eyes these days. And a certain weariness in her step that speaks of long nights.”
You bit your lip, sinking a little lower into the water as lily pads brushed against your skin.
“It is nothing,” you murmured, though the flush in your cheeks betrayed you.
“Nothing?” Vera teased, wading closer, her voice dropping conspiratorially.
“We have seen you grow from a wild little girl into this breathtaking woman. We know your heart. And we know it does not belong to any of those puffed up princes parading through the halls.”
You reached out, squeezing Elara’s hand, then Verra’s, your voice dropping to a shy, trembling whisper.
“It is true,” you confessed, cheeks burning hotter than the midday sun. “I have given myself to Sir Jeon. Body and heart. He is the only man I have ever wanted. The only one who has ever touched me.”
For a heartbeat, silence fell over the bathing pool. Then came the gasps.
Elara’s eyes widened, her hand flying to her mouth. Verra let out a delighted little squeak, nearly dropping the oil vial. Even old Selyse, usually so composed, looked momentarily stunned before her face broke into a warm, knowing smile.
“Oh, my sweet girl,” Elara breathed, scandalized, thrilled. “You wicked little thing! With your own knight? Right under the King’s nose?”
Verra giggled uncontrollably, splashing water playfully in your direction. “And here we thought you were simply fond of him! All those late night ‘stargazing’ trips… you minx! Was he gentle? Was he… big?”
“Verra!” Selyse scolded, though her eyes sparkled with amusement. She turned to you with motherly affection. “Though I must admit, we have suspected for some time. The way he looks at you when he thinks no one is watching… that man is utterly gone for you, my lady.”
You buried your face in your hands, mortified but unable to stop the shy, giddy smile spreading across your lips. Your gaze drifted across the river to where Sir Jeon Jungkook stood guard a respectful distance away, half hidden among the willow trees.
Even from here, you could feel the weight of his stare. He stood tall and imposing in his armor, but his dark eyes were fixed on you with a quiet, burning intensity that always made your stomach flutter.
You bit your lip, still flushed from both the warm water and the memory of his mouth, his hands, his body claiming you so thoroughly the night before.
“He is… everything,” you whispered dreamily, more to yourself than the maids. “Strong. Honorable. And when we are alone… he worships me like I am his entire world.”
Verra let out another delighted laugh. “As he should! Our princess deserves nothing less. Though if the King ever finds out…”
Selyse gently squeezed your shoulder, her voice softening with both love and concern.
“Then we will protect your secret as fiercely as we have protected you all these years,” she said. “You deserve to love who you love, my dear. Crown or no crown.”
You looked back at Sir Jungkook again. He hadn’t moved from his post among the willow trees, tall and steadfast in his armor, but your heart ached with a sharp mix of fear and wonder.
If The King ever discovered the truth, he would not spare your knight. Sir Jungkook would be banished, or worse. And you… you would be married off immediately to seal the wound.
The thought disturbed you deeply.
You turned back to the water, forcing a smile for your maids, but the warmth of the bath could no longer chase away the chill settling in your chest.
—
The rumors had begun to spread like fire through the palace corridors.
A lesser knight claimed he had seen “suspicious movement” near the eastern tower. One of the visiting princes mentioned, with a sly smile, that the Princess seemed unusually attached to her personal guard. Nothing concrete, nor proven. But the whispers were growing louder.
Your maids noticed your distraction immediately. During your morning dressing, Verra fastened the laces of your gown with unusually tight pulls, her voice urgent.
“My lady… you must be more careful,” she whispered. “Some of the king’s men have been asking questions about Sir Jeon. They say he spends too many nights away from the barracks. And one of Prince Min’s retainers swears he saw a tall figure slipping into your wing after midnight.”
Elara’s hands paused on your hair. “The knight is being cautious now. He avoids being seen with you as much. But you… you still look at him like he hung the moon. It is only a matter of time before the King hears something he cannot ignore.”
Selyse placed a gentle hand on your shoulder, her eyes full of love and worry. “You are playing with fire, sweet girl. And fire does not care how much you love it.”
Your heart clenched with fear. You hadn’t seen your knight alone in a week. He had been deliberately distant, protecting you both by keeping his distance. The absence gnawed at you like hunger.
That night, you sent for him under the pretense of needing extra security for a private walk in the inner courtyard.
The moment the hidden door to your chambers closed behind him, you were on him.
You pushed Sir Jungkook against the wall, frustration and fear pouring out of you in a desperate kiss. Your hands fisted in his tunic, tugging him closer.
“Where have you been?” you demanded between kisses, voice shaking. “I was scared. I thought something had happened to you. I thought my father had already—”
“I’m here,” he whispered against your lips, rough with emotion. He pulled you closer, arms wrapping around you. “I’m right here, my love.”
But then he pulled back slightly, forehead pressed to yours. His dark eyes were filled with pain.
“I cannot stay,” he said quietly. The words hit you like a blow. “Your father has ordered me to lead a company to the western borders. There have been reports of raiders. He says it is to prove my devotion to protecting the realm… and you. He also made it clear I can no longer linger so closely around you. The rumors are growing too loud.”
You stared at him, heart shattering.
“No,” you whispered, then louder, “No. You cannot leave me. Not now. Not after everything.”
Tears stung your eyes as the hurt poured out.
“After our first night, you pulled away. You kept your distance like I was poison. And now you’re leaving entirely? What if something happens to you out there? What if I lose you forever? I can’t take it, Jungkook. I won’t survive it.”
Your hands moved frantically, tugging at the straps of his armor with desperate, angry fingers.
“I don’t care about the king. I don’t care about the borders. I only care about you.”
Piece by piece, you stripped him. The armor fell to the floor with heavy clangs until he stood completely bare before you, broad chest, scarred skin, powerful frame looking every bit of the warrior he was. You shoved him back onto the bed and climbed on top of him, straddling his hips.
Sir Jungkook’s hands moved instinctively to the laces of your corset, trying to free you fully, but you slapped his hand away, tears already glistening in your eyes.
But the knight was patient. He sat up slowly, your legs still wrapped tightly around his waist, and gently cupped your face with both hands. His thumbs brushed away the tears on your cheeks with heartbreaking tenderness.
“My love,” he whispered, voice soothing, “Let me worship you. Let me take care of you tonight. Please.”
He leaned in and captured one of your sensitive breasts in his mouth, sucking slowly. His tongue swirled around your stiff nipple, drawing a shaky moan from you. He moved to the other, giving it the same devoted attention, sucking and licking until your back arched and fresh tears slipped down your cheeks, this time from overwhelming sensation and emotion.
Holding you close, then gently but firmly, Sir Jungkook leaned back, gripping your hips and guiding you upward. In one rapid motion, he pulled you over his face, settling you directly onto his waiting mouth. Your soaked folds pressed flush against his lips and tongue, your thighs framing his head as he looked up at you with pure hunger.
“Use me,” he growled against your dripping folds, the vibration sending sparks through your core. “Pleasure yourself on my tongue love. I want to drown in you.”
You hesitated for half a second, still shy and nervous, cheeks burning hot even as your body screamed for more. But the frantic ache between your legs won out. You lowered yourself more fully, your slick cunt sliding over his mouth, his nose buried against your clit. He groaned loudly, the sound muffled and obscene as he immediately speared his tongue deep inside you, licking and sucking at your juices like a man starved.
You started moving almost desperately, grinding down with frantic little rocks of your hips. Shyness still flickered in your chest, making you whimper and bite your lip, but the pleasure overrode everything. Your hands braced on the headboard as wet, filthy sounds filled the room, the slick slide of your cunt over his tongue, his eager slurping and moaning, the way he sucked your swollen clit between his lips and flicked it mercilessly.
“Oh gods...” you gasped. Your thighs trembled around his head as you grew bolder, grinding harder, smearing your arousal all over his face. He gripped your cheeks, spreading them, holding you down so you could use him exactly how you needed. His tongue ravished in and out of your dripping hole, then flattened to lap broad strokes from your entrance to your clit, devouring every drop.
But it wasn’t enough.
You lifted off his face with a wet pop, strings of your arousal connecting you to his glistening mouth. His eyes were dark, lips swollen and shiny with your juices. Before he could speak, you slid down his body impatiently.
You straddled his hips, wrapped your hand around his thick, throbbing cock, and sank down onto him in one frantic motion.
The stretch made you cry out, but you didn’t stop. You rode him hard, bouncing on his length with frantic, emotional need, your breasts bouncing heavily with every harsh drop of your hips.
“Don’t leave me,” you sobbed, riding him faster, tears falling onto his chest. “Please, Jungkook… I can’t lose you. Not after this. Not after you’ve ruined me for anyone else.”
He thrust up to meet you, matching your desperate rhythm, his strong hands gripping your hips to guide you deeper.
“I don’t want to go,” he rasped, voice breaking with the same pain. “But I must. Your father commands it. I have to prove my loyalty… so I can stay by your side.”
You leaned down, kissing him messily through your tears, riding him like you could keep him here forever if you just moved fast enough.
“Then stay inside me,” you begged, voice cracking. “Fill me up. So deep that a part of you stays with me even when you’re gone. I want to carry you with me when they try to take you away.”
Sir Jungkook groaned deeply. His hands tightened on your hips as he suddenly flipped you onto your back, pinning you beneath his powerful body.
He made love to you then, with deep, devastating strokes that reached the very core of you. His mouth never left your skin, sucking marks into your neck, whispering promises between every thrust.
“You are mine,” he breathed against your lips, hips rolling deeply. “I will come back to you. I will fill you again and again until you swell with our future.”
You wrapped your arms and legs around him, clinging desperately as another orgasm built inside you. When it finally crashed over you, you sobbed his name, walls pulsing tightly around his thick cock.
Sir Jungkook followed right after, burying himself as deep as possible with a low, guttural groan. He came hard, flooding your womb with thick, pulsing ropes of his seed, holding you so tightly it felt like he was trying to merge your souls together.
Even after, he stayed buried inside you, pressing soft kisses to your damp forehead, your cheeks, your trembling lips.
“I don’t want you to go,” you whispered, small and broken. “I love you too much.”
Sir Jungkook pressed a soft kiss to your temple, his arms never loosening. “I know, my love,” he murmured. “And that is why I must return to you. No matter what.”
The weeks following Sir Jungkook’s departure had stretched into an endless gray fog.
You moved through your royal duties like a ghost wearing a crown. You sat through council meetings with a straight spine and a hollow smile, listening to nobles bicker about alliances, trade routes while your mind wandered back to your knight’s strong arms. Every night since, your bed felt too large, too cold. You would press your face into the pillow he had once used and fight the ache in your chest.
You missed him with a desperation that bordered on madness.
This morning was no different. You had barely kept your breakfast down before the maids helped you into a heavy velvet gown the color of deep wine for yet another assembly with potential suitors. The princes and lords from neighboring kingdoms were growing impatient. Your coronation was only a month away, and the pressure to choose a consort was mounting like a noose around your throat.
By midday, the nausea returned with a vengeance. You barely made it through the formal greetings before excusing yourself to the private solar, hand pressed to your mouth.
Elara followed quickly with a basin. You retched violently into it, eyes watering.
“Your Highness…” she whispered, rubbing gentle circles on your back.
“I’m fine,” you rasped, waving her away. “Just… something I ate.”
But it wasn’t.
Later that evening, after the day’s obligations were finally over, Vera and Selyse insisted on the usual massage to ease the tension in your shoulders. They helped you out of your gown until you lay on the wide cushioned table in nothing but a thin silk shift.
The moment Selyse’s skilled hands moved over your breasts, the older maid froze.
Verra, who was working on your legs, also stilled.
“…Your Highness,” Selyse said carefully, “Your breasts… they are fuller. Tender, yes?”
Your breath hitched. You had noticed it days ago but had tried to ignore the swelling, the sensitivity. The way even the softest fabric sometimes made you wince.
Verra’s hands gently pressed against your lower belly, not quite a touch, more an assessment. “And the sickness every morning… the fatigue… the way you’ve been crying in your chambers…”
Your eyes filled with tears. You turned your face into your folded arms, shoulders shaking.
Selyse knelt beside the table, taking your hand gently. “My lady… are you with a child?”
You didn’t answer at first. Then a broken sob escaped you.
“I think so,” you whispered. “I… I don’t know for certain, but the timing…” Your voice cracked. “It would be his. Sir Jungkook’s.”
Both maids exchanged a heavy glance. This changed everything.
Verra spoke softly, “My lady... with your coronation approaching. The lords are already circling like vultures, pushing their sons at you. If this comes out before you choose a prince…”
“I know,” you said, voice muffled. Fresh tears slipped down your cheeks. “I know what it means. But I can’t… I can’t just marry one of them. Not when I’m carrying the child of the only man I’ve ever loved.”
You sat up slowly, clutching the silk shift to your chest, arms wrapped protectively around your still flat stomach.
“My dear knight...” you sniffled. “He is out there fighting gods-know-what, and I’m here pretending to be the perfect princess while my body betrays our secret.”
Selyse brushed a strand of hair from your face with motherly tenderness. “We can hide it a little longer, Highness. Looser gowns. Ginger tea for the sickness. But you must decide soon what path you will take. The child… it will not stay hidden forever.”
You nodded, but your heart was breaking all over again. The thought of choosing one of those cold, ambitious princes while carrying Sir Jungkook’s child made you feel ill all over again.
Selyse pressed a kiss to the top of your head, her voice firm with loyalty. “We pray he returns soon, my lady. And until then, we will guard you and this little one with our lives.”
—
The weeks blurred into months as winter settled over the kingdom like a heavy white shroud. Snow blanketed the towers and gardens, turning the world soft and silent, yet inside your chest, the storm only grew louder.
Sir Jeon Jungkook had not returned.
Your belly had swelled noticeably now, a gentle but undeniable curve that marked the life growing within you. With the help of Elara, Verra, and Selyse, you hid it beneath layers of loose, flowing gowns and heavy cloaks lined with fur.
The rich fabrics concealed the truth for now, but you could no longer ignore the way your body changed, the tender fullness of your breasts, the occasional flutter of movement beneath your skin, and the constant, bone deep exhaustion.
You had begun excusing yourself from the suitors’ assemblies more frequently, claiming headaches or matters of state. But the King, grew increasingly impatient.
In the grand throne room one frost laced afternoon, he fixed you with a stern gaze as snow fell outside the tall windows. “You cannot delay any longer, daughter,” he spoke, heavy with royal command. “Prince Min of Viena is a strong candidate. The coronation is weeks away. You must choose a consort soon. The realm needs stability.”
You bowed your head, hands clasped tightly over your hidden belly beneath the voluminous velvet. “Yes, Father,” you murmured, the lie tasting like ash. Inside, your heart screamed for the only man you wanted.
Every few days, with your maids’ help, you sent letters. Verra would sneak them to a trusted rider, sealed with your private wax. You poured your soul onto the parchment; how much you missed him, the way your body was changing, the secret you carried, your love that only deepened with every passing day. Yet no responses ever came. The silence gnawed at you, feeding nightmares of him lying wounded on some distant battlefield or worse.
The worry became unbearable.
One bitter winter morning, wrapped in a thick hooded cloak that concealed your swollen middle, you slipped away from the castle with only Elara and Selyse accompanying you. The three of you rode through the snow dusted forest to a modest stone cottage on the outskirts of the kingdom, the home where Sir Jungkook had grown up.
When the door opened, an older woman with kind eyes and streaks of silver in her dark hair stood before you. Sir Jungkook’s mother. She froze at the sight of the princess on her doorstep, her hand flying to her chest.
“Your Highness…?” she whispered, stunned. “Surely I do not deserve to be blessed with your presence at my humble door. Please, come inside before the cold takes you.”
She ushered you, Elara, and Selyse quickly into the warm cottage, the scent of pinewood and baking bread wrapping around you like an embrace. The fire crackled merrily in the hearth as she helped you remove your snow dusted cloak. Only when you were seated by the fire did her gaze drop to the unmistakable swell of your belly beneath the loose gown.
You took a steadying breath, your hands resting protectively over your rounded stomach.
“I carry his child,” you said softly, trembling with emotion. “Your son’s. Sir Jungkook’s. He does not know yet… he has not returned, and I… I needed to feel close to him somehow.”
Jungkook’s mother, Maera, stood completely still for a long moment, her eyes wide with shock. Then her hand flew to her mouth as tears welled up in her eyes.
“Oh… gods above,” she breathed, her voice cracking. “A grandchild…? From my Jungkook?” Fresh tears flowed freely as she dropped to her knees in front of you, taking your hands in hers with deep reverence. “My lady… my princess. You honor me beyond words. You honor my son. To think that you, a royal daughter, would carry his child… I am stunned. Truly stunned. And so deeply moved.”
She pressed her forehead to your knuckles, weeping quietly with pure joy and emotion. When she lifted her head again, her eyes shone with fierce affection.
“You are already family to me,” she whispered. “Come here, sweet child.” She rose and pulled you into a warm embrace, cradling you gently as if you were made of glass. “You must be so frightened, carrying this secret alone while he is away. But you are not alone anymore. Not while I draw breath.”
You felt safe in her arms, the weight on your heart easing just a little as winter wind howled softly outside the cottage walls.
After composing herself, Maera wiped her tears and fetched a small wooden chest from a shelf. She sat beside you, opening it with trembling hands.
“Look,” she said tenderly, pulling out several treasured items. She showed you a faded sketch of a chubby baby with dark, serious eyes —Sir Jungkook as an infant. Another portrait showed him as a sturdy little boy of four, holding a wooden sword with determination. There was even a lock of his soft baby hair tied with a ribbon.
“He was always so intense, even as a babe,” she said with a watery laugh. “Strong and quiet… but when he smiled, the whole world lit up. Just like I imagine your little one will.”
You traced the portraits with gentle fingers, tears slipping down your own cheeks. Seeing these glimpses of him as a child made your love for the knight swell even deeper. You could so clearly picture your baby with his eyes, his strength, his rare smile. The thought made your heart ache with both joy and longing.
Maera kept one hand over yours, cherishing you openly. “Thank you for coming to me,” she murmured. “For trusting me with this precious news. We will wait for him together, my daughter. And when he returns, he will be the happiest man alive.”
The two of you sat by the fire for a long while — his mother and the mother of his child, talking softly as snow continued to fall outside, bound by love for the same man.
The days after your visit to Maera’s cottage only deepened the ache in your soul. Winter grew harsher, and so did your impatience. Every morning you woke with your hands on your swelling belly, feeling the strong kicks of his child, and the longing became unbearable.
One evening in the royal chambers, you fell to your knees before the King, tears streaming down your face. “Father, please… I beg you. Bring Sir Jungkook back. I need him. I cannot do this without him.”
The King frowned, confused by your desperation. “Daughter, he is leading my forces on the border. The realm needs him there. Why this sudden insistence on one knight?”
You could not tell him the truth. “I just… need him,” you whispered brokenly. “Please.”
He did not relent. The pressure to choose a suitor only intensified.
And then the sickness took hold.
Your body ached constantly. deep soreness in your back, hips, and breasts that made every movement painful. The baby’s kicks, once a comfort, now left you breathless. You grew feverish and weak.
Elara, Verra, and Selyse rarely left your side, forcing herbal teas and bitter medicines down your throat while piling warm blankets over you. For nearly a week you were bedridden, barely able to leave your chambers, hidden away from the court under the excuse of a winter chill.
One cold, silent night, as snow tapped gently against the window panes, you drifted in and out of a fevered haze. The herbs made the world soft and blurry around the edges.
You thought it was a dream when the heavy door to your chambers opened with a quiet creak and a tall, familiar figure stepped inside, shedding his snow dusted cloak. The firelight caught on his sharp jawline and those intense dark eyes.
Strong arms slipped beneath you, lifting you carefully as he climbed into your grand bed. A warm, calloused hand gently cradled your swollen belly. You felt the press of soft, reverent lips against the curve of your stomach.
“My love…” The knight’s deep voice whispered against your skin, rough with emotion. “I’m here. I finally came back to you.”
“Jungkook…?” you murmured drowsily, eyelids heavy, unsure if this was real or another cruel dream born of longing and medicine.
“It’s me,” he breathed, pulling your body flush against his solid chest. He was real. warm, solid, smelling of snow, leather, and the faint scent of campfires. “I’ve been aching for you every single day. Your touch, your voice… it kept me alive out there.”
His large hand stroked slow, soothing circles over your rounded belly, feeling the baby shift and kick beneath his palm. He lowered his head, pressing his lips directly to the taut skin.
You let out a tired, broken sound. “You left me… You promised you’d come back sooner. Look at me… I’m so sore, so heavy with your child, and you weren’t here…”
Sir Jungkook chuckled softly, the sound warm against your skin, even as his eyes glistened with unshed tears. “I know, my princess. I deserve your scolding. I’m deeply sorry.” He kissed your belly again and again, soft open mouthed presses wherever he could reach. Then he trailed his lips higher, attaching his mouth gently to the swollen, aching curve of your breasts, sucking lightly and kissing away the soreness with such care that you whimpered in relief.
His hands never stopped moving, massaging the deep ache in your lower back, cupping and gently holding your heavy breasts to ease their weight, stroking your hips and thighs. He intertwined his fingers with yours, holding your hand tightly as if afraid you might vanish.
“You are unreal, my love.” he murmured, voice hoarse with awe as he looked at you. “Your glow… it’s deeper now. The way pregnancy has changed you… you’re beyond anything I could have imagined. You shine like starlight. Carrying our child has only made you more radiant, more mine.”
You clung to him weakly, drowsy but desperate for his touch. “The baby… it kicks so much. I don’t know if it’s a boy or a girl… but it feels like you. Strong and stubborn.”
Jungkook smiled against your temple, one hand still resting warmly over your belly. “This child is the product of our love. A piece of both of us. I already love them more than life.” He kissed you deeply, slowly, pouring months of aching into it. “Every battle, every cold night, I thought only of coming home to you like this… holding you, feeling our baby move, worshipping the body that’s creating our future.”
He continued kissing every place that ached... the sides of your breasts, the curve of your belly, the inside of your wrist, his mouth soft and devoted. You melted into him, the pain easing under his gentle care as he held you close.
“Stay…” you whispered tiredly, already slipping back into sleep.
“I’m here right now,” he promised, lips brushing your ear. “Sleep, my love. I’ve got you both.”
When morning light filtered through the heavy curtains, you woke slowly, body still aching but strangely comforted.
The bed beside you was cold. No warmth lingered. No cloak on the chair. No scent of him on the pillows. Only the faint memory of strong hands, whispered words to your belly, and soft kisses remained.
You touched your swollen stomach, feeling another firm kick, and tears filled your eyes.
Was it a dream? A fevered hallucination woven from medicine, longing, and love? Or had Sir Jungkook truly returned to you in the dead of night… only to disappear again before dawn?
The herbs and medicines your maids prepared worked their magic. The fever finally broke, the deep soreness in your body eased into a manageable ache, and the constant nausea faded. Though you were still tired, your strength slowly returned. Your belly continued to grow rounder and heavier, the baby’s kicks becoming more insistent and lively.
One quiet winter evening, when the moon hung full over the snow covered palace, your maids turned your chambers into a secret sanctuary.
Accompanied by Sir Jungkook’s mother, they had worked together in absolute secrecy. No one outside your trusted circle knew. They had decorated the large private solar adjacent to your bedroom with soft candlelight, evergreen boughs, and winter white roses. Warm furs and silk pillows were arranged in a luxurious nest near the hearth. Incense of myrrh filled the air, and a small table held gifts wrapped in fine cloth.
They helped you into a loose, flowing gown of the softest ivory silk that draped beautifully over your swollen belly, leaving your shoulders bare. When you stepped into the room, all four women bowed their heads in reverence.
Selyse took your hand and guided you to the center of the soft pillows. “Tonight we celebrate you, my lady. And the precious life you carry. No one else will know of this blessing. It is ours alone.”
They treated you with deep adoration, as though you were sacred.
Elara gently massaged your feet with warm scented oil while Maera brushed your hair until it shone. Verra offered you sweet honeyed fruits and warm spiced milk, foods meant to nourish both you and the baby. Selyse laid her hands lightly on your rounded belly and spoke soft blessings for a safe birth and a strong child.
Selyse, ever wise, placed a small crown of dried herbs and winter berries on your head. “You are the vessel of love and life,” she murmured. “Even in these uncertain times, you bloom. We honor you as our princess… and as the mother of Sir Jungkook’s heir.”
You felt tears prick your eyes as they presented their secret gifts: tiny embroidered blankets, a soft knitted cap in deep green, a small silver pendant shaped like a blooming rose, a symbol of motherhood.
Vera leaned her cheek against your belly for a moment, grinning when the baby kicked in response. “He or she is strong already. Just like their father.”
You placed both hands over your swollen stomach, feeling another firm flutter. The warmth of their love and the secret celebration soothed the constant ache of missing your knight.
“Thank you,” you whispered, “All of you. I don’t know what I would do without you.”
Elara kissed your temple. “We will keep you and this little one safe until Sir Jungkook returns. And he will return.”
The warmth of the secret celebration lingered on your skin as you returned to your chambers that night. The maids had just helped you out of the ivory silk gown when a royal messenger knocked urgently.
“The King demands your presence immediately, Your Highness. In his private study.”
You had no time to prepare. Still glowing from the love and blessings of your maids, you wrapped yourself in a heavy velvet robe that concealed your very swollen belly and followed the messenger.
The moment you entered the study, the atmosphere turned icy. Your father stood behind his desk, several of your letters spread before him.
“Daughter,” he spoke, controlled. “I have given you time to come to me yourself. I know you have been sending letters to the front lines. To Sir Jungkook, specifically.” He turned to face you, his expression stern but not yet furious. “I know of your… admiration for him. Speak truthfully now. What is this attachment?”
Your throat tightened. This was the moment. With your belly heavy with his child and your heart aching, you could no longer hide everything.
“Father…” you began, voice trembling as you stepped closer. “It is more than admiration. I love him. Sir Jungkook is the only man I want.” Your hands instinctively moved to cradle your stomach. “And I… I am carrying his child.”
Silence crashed over the room.
The King’s eyes widened, then narrowed sharply as his gaze dropped to the unmistakable swell beneath your gown. His face darkened with shock, then rage.
“You what?” he hissed. “A knight’s bastard? While I have been parading princes before you? While the entire realm waits for you to secure the throne with a proper alliance?”
“Father, please,” you begged, tears filling your eyes. “It is his. Our love is real. If you would only let him return, we could—”
The King’s face twisted with fury. “You dare speak such filth to me? A royal princess swollen with a common knight’s bastard?”
You rebelled, voice shaking but defiant. “It is not filth. It is love. I will not marry Prince Min. I will not let you use me as a pawn for alliances while I carry the man I love’s child.”
“Enough!” The King slammed his fist on the table, making you flinch. “I have been patient with your childish infatuation, but this is treason against your bloodline. You will do as you are told! Your fate is sealed. You will marry Prince Min before the month ends.”
Later that same night, before your maids could even calm you, you found your most trusted rider in the stables. With tears streaming down your face and snow falling around you, you whispered your final message: “Tell him… tell Sir Jungkook that I will wait for him. No matter how long it takes. My heart is his alone. I will wait.”
The rider bowed and galloped into the night. No response ever came.
The next weeks were a nightmare.
Prince Min visited often, his eyes raking over your body with open lust and infatuation. He complimented your “ethereal glow”, clearly aroused by your pregnant form, but his arrogance disgusted you. He spoke openly of claiming the throne through you, of bedding you the moment you were his. You hated him with every fiber of your being.
You fought your father harder than ever, refusing to attend meetings with Prince Min, screaming that you would rather die than marry him. But the King had reached his limit.
One brutal afternoon, he summoned you again and placed a bloodied cloak and a forged letter before you.
“Sir Jeon Jungkook is dead,” he said flatly. “He fell in battle two weeks ago. This is proof.”
The world shattered.
You collapsed to the floor, a guttural sob tearing from your throat. The baby inside you kicked as if sensing your pain. From that moment, you broke completely.
You refused to eat. You barely slept. You stopped speaking, even to Elara, Verra, and Selyse who begged you through tears to think of the child. You lay in bed for days, staring at nothing, your once radiant glow fading into pale exhaustion. Your maids feared for both your life and the baby’s.
Despite how numb you had become, when your maids gently suggested taking you to Maera’s quiet home on the edge of the forest, you agreed without protest. You were taken there in secret under the cover of night.
Maera, a strong but grieving woman with the same dark eyes as her son, took you in without question. She cared for you with quiet hands and even quieter words. You didn’t speak much to her either, but you accepted her care wholeheartedly. After all, she was mourning the loss of her son, and you were mourning the loss of your lover and the father of your child.
The King, despite his fury, still sent guards to watch over you from a distance. You were still royalty, still carrying what he believed might be his grandchild. But you could only think of the protection you once had... the strongest, safest pair of arms that had ever wrapped around you.
You mourned deeply. But you couldn’t be completely selfish with a baby on the way, restless and eager to come into the world.
The labor came on a stormy night.
The pains started suddenly and violently. Maera and your maids worked frantically around you as you screamed and cried, gripping the sheets until your knuckles turned white. The King himself had ridden out in secret when he heard you had gone into labor, standing outside the cottage with a face pale with rare fear.
He didn’t know how to comfort you. He only knew one thing, his daughter was calling for her knight in her delirium.
Even though he viewed the child as the product of a sinful affair, something in him softened at the sound of your broken sobs. He could not lose you.
Inside the cottage, you gave birth to a baby girl.
She was small, chubby, with a shock of raven hair and big, dark eyes that looked exactly like her father’s. The moment the midwife placed her on your chest, fresh tears streamed down your face.
“She looks like him…” you whispered, hoarse and broken. “My little love… she has his eyes.”
You held her close, sobbing softly as the pain and grief mixed with a fragile, overwhelming love. Even in your exhaustion, you couldn’t stop crying. You believed Sir Jungkook was dead. The thought that your daughter would never know her father tore you apart.
Maera wept beside you, gently stroking your hair. “She’s beautiful,” she whispered. “Just like her mother.”
Outside, the King stood in the rain, waiting.
When the door finally opened and the midwife stepped out, he demanded to know if you and the child were alive. Upon hearing they both were, something in his hardened heart shifted.
He turned to his captain without a word and gave the order.
“Send riders to the western borders at once. Bring Sir Jeon Jungkook back. Tell him… his princess has need of him.”
It would take time. The borders were far, and the roads were muddy from the storms. A week, perhaps a month.
In the quiet warmth of the cottage, you held your newborn daughter against your chest, wrapped in soft linen.
You rocked her gently as she fussed against your breast, nursing hungrily. Your maids and Maera moved around you, bringing broth, fresh cloths, and ever soft words. But you barely spoke. The grief had hollowed you out.
“I wish you could meet your father,” you whispered to the baby one quiet night, voice cracking. Tears slipped down your cheeks as she latched on again. “He would have held you so carefully. He would have loved you more than anything in this world. He would have protected us both…”
Maera sat beside you, her own eyes red from mourning. She placed a gentle hand on your shoulder. “He would have been so proud,” she said softly. “Of both of you.”
You could only nod, throat too tight to speak. The emptiness inside you felt endless. Every time the baby cried, every time she looked up at you with those familiar dark eyes, the pain returned like a fresh wound.
The King demanded your return to the palace, as you were still royalty, still bound to your father’s will despite carrying a child out of wedlock. He wrote letter after letter insisting you resume your duties and prepare for the inevitable marriage to Prince Min. You refused to answer most of them.
Your maids tried their best to comfort you, but even they could not reach the depths of your sorrow. The only light in your world was your daughter. Tiny, perfect, with Jungkook’s dark eyes and a tuft of raven hair. You held her constantly, whispering stories about her father, singing lullabies with a voice that often broke halfway through.
You mourned him deeply. The King had not even granted him a proper funeral. No rites. No chance to say goodbye. Just a bloodied cloak and a cold declaration.
One quiet evening, Maera left the cottage to fetch groceries from the nearby village. Your maids had been called back to the palace on the King’s orders, duties they could not refuse. For the first time in weeks, it was just you and your baby in the small, warm cottage.
You sat by the window, cradling her in your arms. She cooed softly, tiny fingers wrapping around yours as you gently rocked her. For a few precious minutes, you allowed yourself to smile a real, soft smile as you played with her little hands and kissed her forehead.
“My baby,” you whispered, “The loveliest babe. Don’t tell the queens and princesses, I think they’d be terribly jealous.”
The baby blinked up at you. “Oh, yes,” you continued solemnly. “Especially of those cheeks.”
You leaned back in the chair as exhaustion eventually won over you, your eyes growing heavy. With your daughter nestled safely against your chest, sleep claimed you quickly.
When you woke, the cottage was awfully quiet.
Your arms were empty.
Panic slammed into you like a physical blow. You shot upright, heart hammering wildly as you looked around the room.
The baby was gone.
“No… no, no, no...” you gasped, stumbling to your feet, voice rising into a broken sob. “Where is my baby?!”
You searched frantically, under the blankets, behind the chairs, near the hearth, terror clawing at your throat. Your mind spun with nightmarish possibilities. Had someone taken her? Had the King sent men to steal her away?
Then you saw him.
A tall figure standing near the doorway, cradling your daughter gently in his strong arms. She was sleeping peacefully against his chest, tiny fist curled into his tunic.
Your knees buckled.
It was Sir Jungkook.
He looked exhausted, travel worn, mud on his boots, shadows under his eyes, but he was alive. Real. His dark eyes met yours, filled with unbearable love and pain.
You stared at him, trembling violently, refusing to believe what you were seeing.
“No…” you whispered, shaking your head. “No, no, this isn’t real. You’re dead. They told me you were dead. This is another dream. You always come in my dreams and then you leave me again—”
Your voice cracked into a sob as you backed away, hands clutching your chest.
“You left me,” you cried, tears streaming down your face. “You left me and our child. I mourned you. I almost died mourning you. Please… don’t do this to me again. I can’t take another dream. I can’t wake up to find you gone again.”
Sir Jungkook’s face crumpled with anguish. He took one careful step forward, still cradling your daughter like the most precious thing in the world.
“My love,” he said hoarsely, voice breaking. “It’s not a dream. I’m here. I’m real. Your father… he lied. He sent me away to the borders to keep me from you. But I came back the moment he allowed it. I rode without stopping.”
You shook your head harder, tears falling faster, refusing to believe it even as your heart screamed at you to run to him.
“You’re dead,” you repeated, voice small and shattered. “You have to be dead… because if you’re not, then you let me believe it. You never answered my letters. Not one. I wrote to you every single day, pouring my heart out, begging you to come back to me, to our child… and you never...”
Fresh tears spilled down your cheeks as the pain twisted deeper.
“You were in on it, weren’t you?” you whispered, voice breaking. “You let my father tell me you were gone. You left me here to rot in grief while I carried your child alone. How could you?”
The knight’s face crumpled with agony. He took a step forward, but you flinched, and he stopped immediately, hands trembling at his sides.
Before he could speak, your daughter stirred in his arms. As if sensing the suffocating tension in the room, she let out a sharp, hungry cry, her little lips puckering, tiny fists waving.
You moved without thinking, reaching for her. Sir Jungkook gently handed her over, his hands lingering for a moment as if afraid to let go. You turned away from him, sitting on the edge of the bed and loosening your dress to feed her. The baby latched on eagerly, her cries softening into small, contented sounds.
The knight stood there, watching you in silence. He looked lost, this battle-hardened soldier, returned from war, now completely unsure how to comfort the woman he loved. He slowly lowered himself to his knees in the middle of the room, head bowed.
“I wrote to you,” he admitted hoarsely. “Every chance I had. Your father… he made sure none of my letters reached you. He wanted you to believe I was gone. I fought every day to come back to you. I almost died trying to get word to you.”
You didn’t look at him. You kept your eyes on your daughter, tears falling silently onto her soft hair.
“I mourned you like a widow,” you whispered, voice thick with pain. “I almost died. And now you’re here… acting like you didn’t abandon me when I needed you most.”
The words cut awfully deep. Sir Jungkook’s shoulders slumped, but he stayed on his knees, silent and respectful, giving you the space your wounded heart demanded.
Your daughter stirred in your arms, letting out a small, distressed whimper as if she could sense the storm raging between her parents. You rocked her gently, pressing a kiss to her soft raven hair.
“Shh, my sweet one,” you cooed softly, “Mama’s here. You’re safe.”
Sir Jungkook’s hands twitched at his sides, aching to reach out, to touch you, to hold both of you, but he remained still, jaw clenched tight. He was no longer in full armor, only a worn tunic and breeches, his appearance shambled from the long ride, fresh bruises blooming across his knuckles and jaw.
You turned away from him, focusing on the small tasks that had become your life in the cottage. The rain outside grew heavier, pounding against the roof like a relentless drum.
You moved about the space, stirring the pot of stew over the fire, folding fresh linens, anything to keep your hands busy and your mind from breaking completely.
Hours passed in heavy silence. When your daughter finally grew fussy again, you nursed her by the hearth until her little eyes fluttered shut. You laid her gently in the wooden cradle Maera had prepared, stroking her cheek one last time before covering her with a soft blanket.
Only then did you notice movement near the door.
Sir Jungkook was standing there, cloak in hand, quietly preparing to leave.
Something inside you fractured. You stepped toward him, voice cracking. “You’re leaving again?”
He turned slowly, eyes filled with torment. “I was only going to check the perimeter. The rain is heavy, and I… I didn’t want to burden you further.”
You stared at him, this warrior who had survived hell just to return to you, and the dam finally broke.
“Come here,” you whispered.
He obeyed without hesitation.
You led him to your bed and with trembling hands, you began removing his tunic, revealing the damage the war had left behind.
New bruises painted his ribs and shoulders in shades of purple and blue. Fresh scars, still healing, cut across his chest and abdomen. He looked harder, a man who had walked through fire and barely returned.
Your lips trembled, but you forced yourself to stay steady. You turned away briefly, gathering clean linen strips, salve, and a bowl of warm water. When you returned, the knight stood perfectly still, letting you see all of him, the bruises, the brutal evidence of everything he had endured just to return to you.
You began tending to him in silence, your hands gentle as you cleaned a particularly nasty cut along his side. But the more you looked, the more the dam inside you cracked.
“What have they done to you, Jungkook?” you whispered, voice breaking. Tears spilled down your cheeks as you carefully wrapped a bandage around his ribs. “You’re… you’re covered in pain. All of this… just to come back to me?”
He stood motionless, letting you care for him, but his dark eyes never left your face.
“I would go through it a thousand times more,” he said softly, “if it meant coming back to you and our daughter.”
You shook your head, fresh tears falling as you pressed a bandage over another wound. “Don’t say that. Don’t you dare say that. I can’t bear thinking of you suffering like this. I thought you were dead. I thought I would never see you again, and now you’re here… broken because of me.”
Sir Jungkook slowly lowered himself to his knees in front of you, even though you were still trying to tend to him. The powerful knight, the man who had survived war, knelt before you like the loyal protector he had always been.
“Your Highness,” he murmured, head slightly bowed, voice thick with emotion. “I failed you. I wasn’t here when you needed me most. I wasn’t here when you carried our child. I wasn’t here when you gave birth. I wasn’t here when they told you I was gone. Forgive me.”
You dropped the bandages and pulled him into your arms, holding his head to your chest. His arms wrapped around your waist instantly, clinging to you like a man who had almost lost everything.
A broken sob tore from his throat.
Your knight, your warrior, the strongest person you had ever known, cried against your chest like a child. Deep, shuddering sobs that shook his powerful frame as his arms tightened around you.
“I thought I lost you,” he choked out, voice muffled against your skin. “Every night on the border, I prayed I would make it back to you. To both of you.”
You held him tighter, fingers threading through his raven hair, your own tears falling onto his head.
“You’re here now,” you whispered, rocking him gently. “You’re here. You came back to us. That’s all that matters.”
For a long time, the only sounds in the cottage were the rain outside, the crackling fire, and the quiet, heartbroken sobs of a knight who had finally returned to his princess.
—
The rain had not eased by the middle of the night. It hammered against the thatched roof like an impatient army. You had fallen asleep in Jungkook’s arms on the narrow bed, your daughter nestled safely in her cradle beside you. For the first time in months, your sleep was deep and dreamless.
A sharp knock on the cottage door shattered the peace.
Sir Jungkook was awake in an instant. He slipped from the bed silently, pulling on his tunic and reaching for the sword he had left by the door. His body was still tense from war, every muscle ready for threat.
“Stay here,” he whispered, pressing a quick kiss to your forehead. “I will see who it is.”
But you already knew.
A cold certainty settled in your chest. You rose, wrapping a shawl around your shoulders, and followed him despite his warning. Your daughter stirred but remained asleep.
Sir Jungkook opened the door, sword half drawn, rain pouring behind the figure standing outside.
It was the King.
Your father stood in the downpour, cloak heavy with water, face pale and drawn. Guards waited at a respectful distance, torches flickering weakly in the storm. His eyes moved past your knight and landed on you.
For a long moment, no one spoke.
Then the King stepped inside without invitation, water dripping onto the wooden floor. His gaze softened when it fell on you — his only daughter, still pale from childbirth, carrying the weight of grief and motherhood.
“My child,” he said, voice rough. “You must return to the palace. You are still royalty. Still my blood. You do not belong in a cottage like this.”
You stood straighter, even as exhaustion and lingering pain made your body ache.
“I belong where I choose,” you replied quietly, but firmly. “And I will not return without Sir Jeon. He is my knight. He is the father of my daughter. He stays with me.”
The King’s jaw tightened. He glanced at Jungkook, who stood tall and silent beside you, sword now lowered but ready.
“I know what you are to each other,” the King said heavily. “I have known for some time. Prince Min is a fool and a coward, but his bloodline is strong. The alliance—”
“I will not marry him,” you cut in, voice steady despite the tears gathering in your eyes. “I will return to the palace. I will perform my duties as princess, as future queen. I will be the ruler this kingdom needs. But only if Sir Jungkook remains at my side. As my knight. As the man I have chosen. As the only man with any right to me.”
The King looked at you for a long time. He saw the woman you had become, not just his rebellious daughter, but a figure of quiet strength. The people in the surrounding villages spoke of you with reverence. They told stories of the princess who helped common women, shared food during hard winters, who listened to their troubles as if they mattered as much as any noble’s.
The King exhaled slowly, defeated but not broken.
“Very well,” he said at last. “Sir Jeon will return with you. He will remain your personal knight. But this… affair… must remain hidden from the court. For now.”
You nodded once, relief flooding through you.
The King’s gaze drifted to the cradle where your daughter slept. He had not yet seen her. You had kept her away from him, protecting her with every fiber of your being.
He took one hesitant step toward the cradle, then stopped, as if afraid.
The King’s shoulders sagged. For the first time in years, he looked truly old.
“Bring her home,” he said quietly. “Both of you. We will find a way.”
When the heavy door of the cottage finally closed behind your father, you let out a huge, shaky sigh. The weight of the conversation pressed on your chest like a stone. You turned and walked to the cradle, gently lifting your daughter into your arms. She stirred but settled quickly against your chest.
Sir Jungkook followed silently behind you, his presence warm.
“I would not trust him,” you whispered, voice laced with bitterness. “My father lied. He did all of this, told me you were dead, kept us apart, made me believe I had lost you forever. How can I believe a single word he says now?”
Jungkook stepped closer. He gently wrapped his arms around you from behind, resting his chin on the top of your head as you held your daughter.
“Petal,” he murmured softly, the old endearment slipping out like a balm. “Your father is a hard man, but he is not as cold as he pretends to be. He sent for me the moment he learned you had gone into labor. He could have kept me away forever. But he didn’t.”
You turned slightly in his arms, eyes wide with disbelief.
The knight continued, low and calm.
“There was one night… when you were still heavy with our child and very sick. I rode through a storm to reach you. Your father allowed it. He let me see you. I held you while you slept, fevered and restless. I whispered to you. I kissed your forehead and promised I would return. But I had to leave before dawn. He made me swear not to wake you. He said it would only make the pain worse when I had to go back to the borders.”
You stared at him, stunned. Tears welled up again.
“That night… it was real?” you whispered. “I thought it was a dream. I thought I imagined your arms around me.”
“It was real,” he said gently, pressing a kiss to your temple. “I was there. And I have regretted leaving you every single day since.”
You turned fully toward him, still cradling your daughter. The baby had woken and was fussing softly. You loosened your dress and began to feed her.
Sir Jungkook watched the two of you with such open love and longing that it made your chest ache.
“She has your eyes,” you said softly, brushing a finger over your daughter’s cheek. “So dark and beautiful. Just like yours.”
Sir Jungkook’s expression softened further. He reached out, gently stroking the baby’s tiny hand.
“And she is as beautiful as her mother,” he murmured. “I hope she grows to be as strong as her. As kind. As full of fire and love.”
For a while, the only sounds were the soft suckling of your daughter and the rain pattering against the roof. Sir Jungkook stayed close, one arm around your waist, the other lightly resting near the baby.
Eventually, after your daughter had fallen asleep again, you made the decision.
“We will return to the palace,” you said quietly. “Together. As a family. I will not hide anymore.”
The next morning, after tender farewells to Maera, who hugged you both tightly and kissed her granddaughter’s forehead with tears in her eyes, you left the cottage.
—
Three Months Later,
The palace had transformed around you.
After your return, the finest healers in the realm were summoned, learned men and women versed in herbs and ancient remedies. They tended to you with the utmost care, restoring the strength you had lost in grief and childbirth. Slowly, the hollow exhaustion faded. Color returned to your cheeks. Your body healed, and with it, your spirit bloomed once more.
You were treated not merely as royalty, but as something sacred. The people whispered that the Princess had returned more radiant than before, as if the earth itself had blessed her.
Your maids, Elara, Verra, and Selyse, were beyond ecstatic to have you back. They fussed over you constantly, brushing your long hair until it shone, dressing you in the finest silks, and whispering prayers of gratitude for your safe return.
The kingdom now knew the truth: the child was Sir Jeon Jungkook’s. The scandal had spread like wildfire, but instead of outrage, most of the people embraced it. They saw their princess glowing, and fiercely protected.
Prince Min had tried to slander you upon his return, calling you impure, unfit, a disgrace for bearing a knight’s child out of wedlock. Sir Jungkook had nearly killed him in the great hall before the King’s guards pulled him back. Prince Min was expelled from the kingdom that very day, the alliance shattered. No one mourned his departure.
It was a warm evening when you returned to the royal bathing pool, surrounded by floating lily pads and fragrant white blossoms. The water shimmered under the sunlight as your maids helped you undress. Your daughter, now three months old and full of life, babbled happily in Elara’s arms, reaching for you with chubby little hands.
“Come here, my sweet,” you cooed, taking her into the warm water with you. She immediately nestled against your bare chest, tiny fingers grasping at your long, wavy hair as you gently rocked her. She was a needy little thing, always wanting her mother’s warmth, her scent, her voice.
Verra smiled as she poured scented oil over your shoulders. “She adores you, my lady. Look at those big, bejeweled eyes.”
You glanced toward the far bank where Sir Jeon Jungkook stood guard, as always. He was no longer forced to hide. He remained your personal knight, ever watchful and devoted. His gaze met yours across the water, soft with love and quiet pride. He had become even more protective since your return, rarely leaving your side unless duty demanded it.
The King had grown strangely silent on the matter of your relationship. Seeing you flourish and beloved by the people, had turned him into something of a coward when it came to opposing you.
He doted on his granddaughter in private, though he still struggled to fully accept the circumstances. Yet he no longer pushed for any other marriage. He had seen what happened when he tried to separate you from your knight.
Bit by bit, your beauty had deepened into something almost otherworldly, skin luminous, eyes bright with life, a gentle fullness to your figure from motherhood that only made you more captivating. You moved through the palace performing your duties with grace while still finding time to help the common women who came to the gates seeking aid. You had become more than a princess.
At night, when the palace slept, Sir Jungkook was yours completely.
He would slip into your chambers, shed his armor, and worship you with slow hands and mouth. He made love to you like a man who had walked through hell and returned only for this. You clung to him every night, whispering how much you loved him, how you had chosen him long before the crown ever mattered.
Your daughter babbled softly, pulling at your long hair again with her tiny fist, drawing a soft, delighted laugh from you.
“Oh, my little one,” you cooed, gently untangling her fingers from your waves before pressing a kiss to her chubby cheek. “You are going to pull Mama’s hair right off if you keep that up, aren’t you? Such a strong little flower.”
She giggled in your arms, reaching up to pat your face with her small, uncoordinated hand, her big dark eyes, exact replicas of her father’s, sparkling with pure joy. The resemblance was almost startling even at such a young age. She was the most beautiful thing you had ever seen.
Elara sighed dreamily as she poured warm water over your shoulders. “Look at her, my lady. She is perfection. She already has the whole palace wrapped around her tiny finger.”
Verra nodded, gently massaging oil into your hair. “And you, my princess. You glow like the sun itself these days. Motherhood suits you more than any crown ever could.”
Selyse, ever the wise one, glanced toward the bank where Sir Jeon Jungkook stood guard, fully armored but with his helmet removed today. A small, teasing smile tugged at her lips.
“And that one over there… he can’t take his eyes off the two of you. Look at him, standing there like a lovesick fool in steel. Our fierce knight, brought to his knees by a baby and her mother.”
The knight’s ears turned faintly red, but he didn’t deny it. His gaze remained soft, locked on you and your daughter with quiet awe and devotion.
Later that evening, in the royal rose gardens where he had once walked beside you as your new knight, Sir Jungkook carried your daughter in his arms.
He was still in full armor, crimson cloak draped over his broad shoulders, but he held her with such careful gentleness it made your heart melt. The baby was dressed in the softest cream colored gown embroidered with tiny golden flowers, a little bonnet tied under her chin. She looked like a living doll against his armored chest.
She reached up with both hands, grabbing at the edge of his armor, babbling excitedly as she tried to pull herself closer to his face. When he leaned down, she patted his cheek with a wet, sloppy kiss.
Sir Jungkook’s entire expression softened into something almost boyish. He smiled, genuine and devastatingly handsome.
“My little love,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.
You walked beside them, heart full as you watched your daughter play with the buckles on his armor. Every time he lowered his head to let her see his face, she lit up. But when he playfully put his helmet back on for a moment to tease her, she immediately fussed, letting out a small, indignant cry and reaching for him with both arms.
“No helmet,” you laughed softly. “She hates it. She wants to see her father’s face.”
Sir Jungkook removed it immediately, tucking it under one arm while cradling her with the other. He leaned down so she could press her tiny palms against his cheeks and give him another sloppy kiss on the jaw.
The maids watching from a distance cooed and teased him lightly.
“Look at that,” Verra whispered loudly enough for him to hear. “Who would have thought the man who survived the western borders would be brought down by tiny hands and gummy smiles?”
Later that night, the heavy oak door to your royal chambers was barred, only the soft glow of candles and the low fire in the hearth illuminated the room.
You stood before the tall mirror, slowly changing into your nightgown. The fabric whispered against your skin as it slid down your body. Your gaze caught on the beautiful ring on your finger, the one Sir Jungkook had slipped onto your hand in secret weeks ago, a quiet promise between the two of you. You turned it gently, a small, private smile touching your lips.
Your daughter lay nestled against your bare chest, warm and content, her tiny fingers curled around the edge of your loosened gown. She babbled softly, her big dark eyes full of adoration for her mother.
Sir Jungkook stood a few steps behind you, fully armored except for his helmet, watching the two of you with quiet awe. The firelight danced across his face, highlighting every healed scar and the lingering shadows of war that still clung to him.
You gently laid your daughter in her ornate cradle, pressing one last kiss to her forehead as she drifted into sleep. Then you returned to the mirror, picking up the silver brush to run it through your long, wavy hair.
Sir Jungkook followed without a word. He stopped behind you, his large hands resting lightly on your waist. Slowly, he leaned down and began pressing soft kisses along your bare arms, from shoulder to wrist, as you continued brushing your hair.
You giggled softly, cheeks flushing with that familiar shyness even after all this time.
“Jungkook…” you murmured, breathy. “You ought to distract me.”
“Good,” he whispered against your skin, kissing the curve of your shoulder. “I have missed you all day. I need my darling.”
He dropped to his knees behind you with a quiet clink of armor, bowing his head in his familiar, devoted way. You turned to face him, running your fingers through his raven hair, then tracing the sharp line of his jaw and the faint scars that remained on his face.
You saddened for a moment, remembering the brutality he had endured.
But he looked up at you with such pure worship that it took your breath away. To him, you were more than a princess. you were his salvation, the very source of life that had healed him.
You pulled him closer, and he rose, lifting you effortlessly into his arms and carrying you to the grand bed.
The knight laid you down gently, then began to worship you with slow, reverent hands. He unlaced your nightgown with painstaking care, peeling the silk away until you were bare before him. His mouth found your breasts immediately, sucking softly on one sensitive nipple, then the other, drinking the sweet milk that flowed for him with deep, grateful groans.
You moaned softly, fingers threading through his hair as he fed from you, his tongue swirling, lips sealed tight around your peak. He drank like a man who had been starving for you, savoring every drop as if it were the very essence of life itself.
Sir Jungkook groaned deeply against your breast, the sound vibrating through your chest as he drank almost desperately. His large hand cradled the soft weight of your breast, squeezing gently to draw more from you while his other hand stroked your side with reverent tenderness.
“So sweet,” he whispered against your skin, voice hoarse and worshipful. “You give me life, my petal. You heal what war tried to break.”
You whimpered, arching into his mouth, overwhelmed by the intimate, sacred act, fresh heat blooming between your thighs.
When he finally released your nipple with a wet pop, his lips glistening, he looked up at you with dark, adoring eyes.
“You are my salvation,” he murmured, kissing the valley between your breasts before moving lower. “The mother of my child. The light that brought me home.”
When he finally moved lower, he spread your thighs with firm hands and settled between them. He looked up at you once, eyes dark with devotion, before lowering his mouth to your core.
He worshipped your flower, seeking nectar with slow, deep licks that made your back arch, followed by gentle suction on your swollen clit. His tongue delved inside you, tasting every inch, groaning at your sweetness as if it were the most sacred thing he had ever known.
You whimpered and moaned, hips rolling against his handsome face as pleasure built in waves. He was relentless yet tender, bringing you to the edge again and again before letting you tip over.
When you finally begged for him, voice trembling with need, Sir Jungkook rose above you like a knight before his altar.
He did not rush. Instead, he sat back on his heels, dark eyes drinking in every inch of your bare, flushed body with such raw hunger that it made your skin burn. You felt vulnerable and impossibly desired under that gaze. A shy, breathless giggle escaped your lips as heat flooded your cheeks.
Sir Jungkook reached out with one large, calloused hand and traced a single finger slowly down your body, from the delicate line of your throat, between your heaving breasts, over the soft curve of your belly, and down to the sensitive skin of your inner thigh. The touch ever so feather light, yet it left fire in its wake.
“You are a goddess made flesh,” he whispered, voice hoarse with awe. “And I am but a mortal who has been granted the honor of kneeling at your feet.”
He leaned down and pressed his forehead to your thigh in a gesture of pure worship, eyes closed, breath warm against your skin as if he were praying to the only deity he had ever believed in.
Then he moved over you, settling between your spread thighs. His thick cock pressed against your entrance, hot and heavy. He looked into your eyes as he slowly pushed inside, inch by thick, stretching inch, filling you so completely that your mouth fell open in a silent cry.
You dug your nails into his back as he began to move, first slow and loving, then harder, deeper, claiming you with every thrust.
“I love you,” he groaned against your neck, hips snapping forward. “I love you more than life itself.”
When you came, it was with his name on your lips and tears of overwhelming pleasure in your eyes. Jungkook followed moments later, burying himself deep and spilling inside you with a low, broken groan, filling you with pulse after pulse of his release.
In the quiet that followed, with the knight’s arms still wrapped around you and the weight of the world momentarily forgotten, it was strangely easy to remember the day he had first knelt before the throne.
The impenetrable knight clad in steel, sworn to protect a princess draped in silk. and protect you he would, as though it had been carved into the marrow of every breath he would draw, for eternity.
editing thid in a few hours. thankyou so much for reading!! comments and reblogs are very much appreciated mwah love you all 🫶💋
Warnings: MDNI +18. Oral (f receiving), fingering, p in v, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it, don't be silly), hint of choking, Soft!Dom Ryland. Ryland should be a warning on its own. Porn with a little plot, like very little lol. Do let me know if I missed anything.
It's 3am, apologies for any mistakes that there might be, my brain is completely fried.
A heavy sigh makes its way past your lips as the apartment door closes behind you, your keys make a clinking sound as you drop them in a bowl and let your bag fall to the floor with a soft thud before taking your coat off.
A small soft smile pulls at your lips when you see Ryland sitting on the couch, laptop on his lap, the soft sound of his typing filling the room.
“Hey.” You say as you walk behind him, leaning over the back of the sofa and gently kissing the top of his head, your eyes closing on their own as you breathe him in. His hand coming up to cover yours over his chest as he greets you back.
“Hey, babe.” He says warmly, turning his head to look at you. “You okay?” He adds, brows furrowed, gentle blue eyes searching yours.
“Yeah, just… tired.” His hand squeezes yours gently before you finally let go of him and walk into your shared bedroom.
He could hear you move around the place, the clinking of your earrings as you placed them on your jewellery dish, followed by your rings and the rustle of clothes as you undressed before walking into the bathroom and the sound of running water as you stepped into the shower.
You stood under the water spray, your eyes closed, letting the hot water relax your muscles and wash away the tension of the day. Work had been rough lately, and you were starting to really feel it.
And Ryland, had of course noticed. How some days you’d just lay down by his side on the couch, head on his chest as he read, his warmth and the steady rhythm of his beating heart lulling you to sleep after a long day, and a night full of tossing and turning in bed and very little rest. How some nights he’d find you asleep at the dining table, head on your arms surrounded by notes and tabs open on your computer screen with reports waiting to be finished.
When you walked out of the bathroom, fluffy robe wrapped around you, he was sitting at the end of the bed, his blond hair all tousled from him repeatedly running his hand through it, a gentle smile pulling at your lips when his eyes met yours.
“Come here.” He says, his hand reaching out for you.
You take his hand and let him pull you to stand between his legs. His hands fall to your hips as he looks up at you, chin resting on your navel. His eyes close as you run your hands through his hair, his hands toying with the belt of your robe. You take a moment to admire the man before you.
“Let me take care of you.” he says, his voice low, his blue eyes meeting yours again and a shiver runs down your spine at the intensity of his gaze.
His fingers slowly untie your robe, the garment falling open as his hands find their place on your hips. You let out a shaky breath as he kisses your exposed skin, the delicious scratch of his stubble adding to the sensation as he makes his way upwards, his hands travelling up to your breasts and cupping them gently, thumbs running over your perked nipples as you bite your bottom lip, eyes closing on their own.
“So perfect.” He says, eyes fixated on the way your tits fit so perfectly in his hands, before he takes a nipple in his mouth.
He lets out a content hum that makes your head spin, your head falling back. Your hand in his hair keeping him close, not wanting him to stop. Soft moans slipping past your lips.
He repeats his actions on the other one, his free hand pulling you close, as if he couldn’t get enough of you before finally pulling apart and looking up at you. Eyes blown with lust meeting yours as you look down at him, cheeks warm with that blush he absolutely adores.
“You’re so perfect. So good to me.” A soft moan slips past your lips at his words as his hand gently travels down your body, slipping between your thighs. Your breath catches when he runs his fingers through your folds, eyes never leaving yours. “I’ve barely touched you and you’re already dripping, baby.” He says, satisfaction clear in his voice, a smile pulling at the corners of his lips as he peppers the skin on your navel with kisses.
The mix of his words and the feeling of his fingers running through your folds, grazing your clit, teasing your entrance makes your head spin. He inserts a finger making your suck in a breath, his lips finding your nipple again as he pumps it in and out of you, and you don’t even try to fight the moans that bubble in your throat at the feeling. A second finger joins the first as he moves on to the other nipple, biting it teasingly and earning a breathy “fuck” from you as you get lost in the sensation. Heat pools in your core as he works you closer to your orgasm, thumb drawing tight circles on your clit.
You let out a whine when his fingers leave you as he stands and he huffs a laugh. “So eager, babygirl.” He says against your lips before kissing you, and you melt against him, fingers running through his hair, pulling him impossibly close.
He pushes the robe off your shoulders, and you let it fall to the floor. The cool air hitting your skin and making a shiver run down your back. The hand on your hip pulls you closer to him, and you can feel the hard outline of him against your thigh, as the other cups your face to deepen the kiss. His tongue exploring your mouth and swallowing your moans.
“I thought you were gonna take care of me.” You manage to say, breath ragged, as he trails kisses down your jaw and to your neck, finding that spot below your ear that makes you gasp and your knees buckle.
You can feel him smile against your skin, clearly pleased with the effect he has on you.
“That mouth of yours is gonna get you in trouble someday.”
“It’s only earned me praise so far.” You say, moving your hand to palm him through the fabric of his joggers and he lets out a strained groan.
He manoeuvres you until the back of your legs hit the end of the bed.
“On the bed.” He instructs and you bite your bottom lip as you do as you’re told.
His hands on your knees pull your legs open so he can see all of you, and you feel yourself getting shy under the intensity of his gaze. The fact that you’re completely bare before him while he’s still fully clothed not helping.
“I still can’t believe you’re mine.” Heat pools at your core as he speaks.
He positions himself over you, the tip of his nose grazing the delicate skin of your cheek before his mouth claims yours once more. Deep and slow and you can’t help but moan against him, your hands in his hair, on his shoulders, everywhere.
“You gonna be good for me?” You can’t help but nod. His hands are everywhere as he trails his way down your body, peppering your skin with hot, open-mouthed kisses. Tasting you as he makes his way closer to where you need it, taking his sweet time licking and biting and sucking on your nipples, revelling in the way you arch your back, his name falling from your lips in broken whispers.
“Fuck Ry, stop teasing.” You whine as he kisses your hip, the inside of your thigh, everywhere except where you need him the most.
You gasp when his finally runs his thumb through your folds again as he looks at you over the rim of his glasses, admiring your flustered state, something in his eyes you can’t really put your finger on. Almost reverent.
And then his mouth is on you, sucking and licking and making you see stars. His thumb toying with your clit as he hums against you, the vibrations travelling through you, your hips lifting from the mattress chasing his mouth.
“Oh m- fuck, Ry!” A strong arm wraps around your thigh and settles on your hip, holding you in place as he eats you out like a starved man. You hold onto the sheets for dear life as your free hand falls to his head. Fingers tanging in his hair, pulling on it and spurring him in as he monas against you. His stubble scratching your skin deliciously.
You feel yourself getting closer, the coil in your core tightening with each passing second and he gives no indication of stopping anytime soon.
When the dam finally breaks, you fall apart with his name on your lips, body tensing and thighs quivering as he drinks you up, still going through the waves of your orgasm. Only stopping when it becomes too much and you push his head off you, oversensitive and still lost in the sensation, unable to form coherent words.
He lays his head on your thigh, chin glistening with your release, watching you as you come down from your high, chest rising and falling furiously. Fingers tracing random patterns on your skin, grounding you, speaking words of praise as you slowly come back to him.
“You still with me?” He asks tenderly, making you look down at him.
A soft smile pulling at his lips and you nod, not trusting yourself enough to speak yet.
He kisses you hip before standing to take off his own clothes, then positioning himself over you, caressing your cheek lovingly, eyes searching yours.
“You did so good.” You can taste yourself on him when he kisses you, something sweeling in your chest at his words. “My good girl.” He says against your lips, his hand pulling your leg to wrap around his hip.
“Yours.” You breather out as he lines himself up to your entrance.
You both let out a groan as he enters you, his breath hot against your skin, your nails digging on his back, loving the way he stretches you, making you feel impossibly full.
His forehead rests against yours once he bottoms out. “Taking my cock so well.” As he gives you a moment to get used to him.
“Move.” You breath out and he complies immediately, pulling out almost all the way before thrusting back int you, making you curse.
He starts slow and steady before setting a punishing pace, hitting that spot inside you that makes you see stars every time. You can feel every vein and every ridge as he fucks you into the mattress, hands grabbing your hips hard enough to leave marks. The sound of skin slapping against skin, and your mixed moans filling the room.
His hand travels up your body, settling on your neck, fingers wrapping gently around it as you pull him down for a kiss, and making you whine when his pace slows, eventually stilling inside you.
“Ry..”
“Ry what.” He smiles against your lips as you try to buck your hips, chasing some friction.
“Please.”
“Please what? Use your words, babygirl.” He says, thrusting into you once and making you mewl, your walls involuntarily clenching around him.
“Pleas- Please make me come.” Under different circumstances you’d cringe at how desperate you sound. But all you cared about right now was coming on his cock.
“It’ll be my pleasure.” He says as he starts thrusting into you again, his free hand finding your clit.
This time he doesn’t stop. His name falling from your lips like a prayer, nails digging into his back, your orgasm building with every thrust as he whispers sweet praises into your ear.
“Ry I-“
“I know, I know, baby. I got you.”
You can barely think straight as you feel yourself almost tipping over the edge.
“Please.” You’re not sure what you’re pleading for, but you are.
“Come for me, baby.” He encourages and that’s all it takes for you to fall over the edge.
He fucks you through the waves of your orgasm, his own thrusts becoming erratic until he finally stills. Painting your walls with hot ropes of cum, filling you up with his release. His head falling to your shoulder before he turns the both of you over so you’re lying on his chest, his now softening cock still inside you as you both try to catch your breath.
“You okay?” He asks, lips grazing your temple before placing a kiss there. His hand running over your back soothingly.
“Mhmm” He lets out a breathy chuckle at your content hum.
You stay like that for a bit before he pulls out, making you wince, a soft apology spoken into your hair as he gets out of bed and disappears into your shared bathroom, before resurfacing moments later with a damp cloth.
He cleans you up tenderly, placing a teasing kiss on your folds once he’s done, earning an amused look for you.
“Come here.” You reach your arms out for him to join you in bed.
He pulls the covers over the two of you as he does so, pulling you to lay on his chest, arms wrapping around you.
“You feeling better?” He asks as he runs his fingers over your back soothingly.
“Yeah, thank you.” You say softly, looking up at him with a content sigh. “Now I’m even more tired though.” He shakes under you as he laughs at that.
“I can fuck the stress out of you, but there’s only so much I can do about the tired part.” He says before leaning in to catch your lips in a sweet kiss as you giggle against his mouth.
Summary: Weeks apart and a worldwide clothing launch later, Jungkook returns to his hotel suite to find the ultimate reward waiting in his bed: you, dressed in his own collection.
Genre/Pairing: idol!jungkook x fem!reader | established relationship au!
Word count: 7.2k
Warnings: 18+ ONLY!!!! not proofread, lowercase intended, lil plot lot of smut, much needed reunion sex; lil angst(they missed each other!), soft & passionate turned hungry & possessive rq, sweaty jk (buff jk is BACK), thigh riding, he rips her clothes (RIP but he will buy her more <3), jk is a YEARNER; he’s so needy for oc, they are messyyyy, praising, edge play, oral(ish?) f receiving, lil choking, creampie (wrap before you tap!), cute fluffy aftercare with lots of kisses <333 lmk if I missed anything!
DISCLAIMER: This one-shot is a work of fiction intended for entertainment purposes ONLY. All events, dynamics, and dialogue are entirely fictional and products of the author's imagination. It is not true to life, nor does it reflect the actual personal life of any real individual, and should not be taken as fact.
Author's note: happy sunday, my stars🌟 I took a break from writing my current series to write this because I cannot get over how good jk looks with his new ck collection that just dropped. Also not to mention how hes been acting up on tour (when he grabbed his own neck during BS&T?! oh how I wish that could've been me in that moment 🚬) I just had to write about it. I'm still new to writing smut, but nonetheless, I had a lot of fun (and release..tmi?), so I hope you enjoy it as much as I did (😏...okay I'll stop) writing it. As always, leave your thoughts in the comments, and I can't wait to read them! And a special thank you to those who asked to be on the taglist, it means so much to me! <333
P.S. for any of you who saw this posted yesterday(I'm sorry I keep letting this happen and set it to the wrong schedule, I'm trying my best🙏🏻), please give it another read as there has been some edits/changes <3
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the hotel door clicked shut, jungkook locking it behind him. he was entirely spent.
he just got back from working out. muscles still tingling with warmth, sweat glistened along his neckline, and his oversized gym shirt hung loose on his broad shoulders.
it had been an exhausting yet monumental day for him; the final show at stanford was behind him, and his highly anticipated ck collection had officially dropped worldwide just a few hours prior. his phone was vibrating nonstop with endless congratulatory texts.
he loved it, but right now, all he wanted was to crash.
the achievement felt empty without the one person he wanted to share it with. he hadn’t seen you in a couple of weeks due to touring, and the distance had turned into a constant ache in his chest.
tossing his room key on the entry table, he sighed heavily, immediately dropping to sit on the small bench in the entryway to rid himself of his shoes. he unlaced them, kicking them off before tugging off his black toe socks, letting his bare feet sink into the cool carpet. the relief was instant.
standing up, he pulled out his phone. it was late here, past midnight. he knew you would be waking up soon, back home to get ready for the day. he couldn't wait any longer; he needed to see your face, craved to hear your voice.
he tapped your name as he walked down the short hallway, holding the screen up and waiting for the call to connect so he could finally talk to you.
he stepped into the dimly lit bedroom, pulling his shirt over his head to throw towards a chair, eyes glued to the phone. but as he looked up, the call still connecting, he stopped dead in his tracks.
the phone slipped slightly in his grip.
you were sitting on the edge of the bed, bathed in the soft amber glow of the bedside lamp.
jungkook’s breath hitched, shocked by your physical presence causing his exhaustion to instantly evaporate from his limbs.
he blinked, thought for a moment that the fatigue was making him hallucinate. however, the wave of your scent in the air anchored him to reality.
you were actually here. you had flown out to surprise him.
and were wearing nothing but your bra and underwear.
correction, his intimate set from his newly launched collection. the charcoal fabric was minimal and sleek, but the true highlight was the intricate embroidery woven on the side of your breast. it was a graphic print similar to his iconic finger woozy smiley face tattoo on his right hand.
he had spent countless late nights meticulously sketching out concepts and figuring out how to incorporate his own style into design elements. he had been so incredibly nervous about getting everything right, treating it with the same intense focus he gave a new album.
through it all, you had been his anchor and his most trusted source. when he was stuck, he would pull you onto his lap, asking for your honest input on what would actually feel comfortable and look flattering.
you had cheered him on through every single draft, celebrating every milestone, no matter how small.
but seeing the final product on you changed everything. it didn’t feel like a design choice anymore; it felt like a beautiful, physical claim that tied him directly to you, making it clear you belong to him.
“hi… do you like it?” you asked, a soft teasing smile playing on your lips, watching his eyes wander.
jungkook didn't answer right away.
his gaze darkened, entirely consumed by you as he tossed his phone somewhere, completely forgotten.
he crossed the room in slow agonizing strides and knelt right between your knees, his large hands settling firmly on your thighs.
thumb reaching up, his warm skin brushing against yours as he traced the embroidery, as if matching the tattoo on his finger to the pattern on you.
"are you real?" he whispered, voice cracking slightly as he stared up at you, utterly dazed. "am i dreaming right now?"
a laugh spilled from your lips at his bewilderment, breaking the stillness of the room; it was soft and oh so pretty to his ears. “yes, baby,” you smiled warmly, your heart swelling at the sheer vulnerability in his eyes. "this is real. i'm right here."
you reached out, palm gently cupping the warm, slightly damp skin of his cheek. the small contact made him instantly melt.
he leaned his head into your touch, closing his eyes for a moment to drink in the reality of feeling your skin against his.
a deep sigh of relief left his chest as he dropped down, resting his face against the top of your bare thighs.
his hands find sanctuary on you, slowly rubbing up and down the length of your legs, his palms soft against your bare skin.
"i missed you so much," he murmured against your skin, voice muffled but thick with emotion. "you have no idea... every single day… missing you." he tilted his head, pressing a soft, lingering kiss to the soft flesh of your thigh, then another one higher up, before looking up at you through his long dark lashes. his blown-out pupils reflected the amber glow as he whispered, "what did i do to deserve you tonight?"
your hands moved from his hair down to his broad shoulders, squeezing them softly. "i missed you so much, too, baby," you whispered back, your voice full of affection as you leaned closer to him, hand tracing his chest tattoo into his shoulder.
"i wanted to surprise you. you've been working so hard, and you've been so busy lately... i just thought you deserved to see a piece of your own collection as a reward after everything you've poured into it."
a slow smile broke through his intense gaze, thick with a deep love that made his dark eyes soften.
god, he was one lucky man.
hearing you say those words, acknowledging all the sleepless nights and the effort he’d put in, sent a different kind of warmth rushing straight to his chest. he let out a soft chuckle, pulling you into his arms and holding you tight against him, getting you giggling against his damp neck.
the sound of your laugh relaxed the remaining tension in his shoulders, though his eyes remained focused on you as he pulled back just enough to look at you. he slid his other hand up from your thigh, his large fingers tangling securely into the hair at the back of your neck to hold you steady.
“do i get more than just a piece?” he asked.
“mmm, come find out,” was your reply.
you were playing dirty, and he loved every second of it.
jungkook’s breath hitched as he stared at your lips, but then he hesitated, his eyes flickering down to his bare chest. "baby, wait," he murmured, his voice reluctant as he tried to pull back an inch. "i just got back from the gym. i'm sweaty. i should shower first."
reaching forward, you wrapped your arms securely around his neck, while simultaneously wrapping your thighs around his waist. you locked your ankles fimly behind his back, pulling his solid frame flush against yours until there was no space left between you.
"i don't care," you whispered against his lips, your breath hot. "we can shower later. i've missed you for weeks, koo. i don't want another single second away from you."
the devotion in your voice snapped the little control he had left. leans toward you, closing the distance. when his lips finally brushed yours, it was tender and passionate. unhurried, he pressed his mouth against yours. your lips molded perfectly together as he leaned into your warmth.
as he deepened it, the smooth metal of his lip piercing caught against your bottom lip, sending a familiar thrill down your spine. he lingered there, tasting your chapstick, thumb gently caressing your jaw to hold you steady. it was the kind of kiss that made your entire body go weak, releasing the tension after weeks of distance.
he pulled back slightly, both of you letting out a sigh of content before he leaned back in to press another lingering kiss.
how had you even managed to get your hands on this specific set? he wanted to ask. the launch had happened a couple of hours ago, and pieces were already selling out. did you pull strings with the pr team? how long have you had this hidden away for?
but honestly, he didn’t care to know the answer. nor did it matter compared to the reality of having you here in his arms.
he just wanted to soak in the sight of you; the feel of you. especially in his new line
it was the sexiest thing he had ever seen, the way it hugged every single curve of your body. underwear clinging to your hips like second skin, making the waistband look striking against your complexion. while the bralette framed your chest perfectly, capturing his focus while leaving just enough to the imagination.
he would be lying if he said he didn’t think about you while creating this specific set. in fact, he completely envisioned your body when he was sketching it out. how it would drape over your skin, and the placement of the embroidery would shift with every breath you take. clearly, his instincts did not disappoint.
well done, jk, he internally gave himself a pat on the back for a masterpiece well done.
but as the room carried the sound of your kisses and the feel of your body against his began to register, the tenderness in his frame started to shift. a deep desire flared in his chest, making his jaw tighten.
as stunning as you looked with it on, he badly wanted to tear it off your frame.
“you look gorgeous, baby,” he murmured, his voice dropping low.
the shift was subtle at first, but as his lips slid along your jaw down to your neck, his kisses turned more frantic, open-mouthed; stinging with a sudden possessiveness. the grip on your thigh tightened while his tatted hand gently cupped the side of your breast. “you’re wearing this all for me?”
his calloused thumb brushed slowly over the fabric where your peak lays, causing you to let out a soft gasp that cut through the quiet room.
“all for you, baby,”
those words coming from you only added fuel to the fire. his gaze dropped to your chest, watching the way the fabric strained against your breathing. it offered zero protection against the heat from his hand, allowing him to feel every rapid beat of your heart syncing with his own.
his lips captured yours again, replaced by a deep, hungry passion; a raw declaration that you belong to him. his tongue slid into your mouth, claiming you, while his pace left you feeling dizzy.
his palms began to map every inch of your body, unable to stay still.
the fingers at your neck trailed hot over your collarbone before slipping under the band of the bralette, eagerly cupping the bare, soft skin of your breast.
simultaneously, his other hand gripped your hip firmly, restlessly tracing the curve of your waist and tugging against the waistband of your underwear. he was everywhere at once, touch heavy and demanding, desperate to map out your body beneath his design.
when he finally parted his lips from yours, his chest was heaving, his blown-out pupils completely coated with desire as he looked down at you.
“you have no idea how badly i want to tear these off of you,” he growled, voice rough that went straight to your core.
before you could tell him to do it, his hands shifted. easily guiding you forward, he shifted your position until you were pulled off the edge of the bed and directly onto his lap, your knees spreading to straddle his thigh.
your breath caught in your throat. his workout shorts offered little to nothing against the muscle beneath you. shifting his leg, he forced your hips to roll against him, creating a spike of friction.
eyes wide, a whimper escaped your lips as you leaned your head back. jungkook lets out a satisfied chuckle against your exposed neck, trailing a path of burning kisses from your jaw to your collarbone.
he bit softly at the skin of your shoulder, making you writhe against him before his wet lips traveled back up to seal over yours, swallowing your moans.
“that’s it, baby,” he murmured against your soft, now warm skin, tone laced with possessive praise. his hands squeezed your waist, keeping you right where he wanted you as he forced another slow tilt on his thigh. “ride me, just like that.”
a shiver ran down your spine as his thumb hooked into the waistband of your underwear again, pulling you even closer until there wasn't any space left between you. he leaned his head back up, eyes locking onto yours with an intensity that made your heart skip a beat.
“j-jungkook,” you moaned, your voice trembling as an overwhelming rush of heat pooled low in your core. your hands dug into the dense muscle of his arms for balance as he nudged your hips forward again.
"yeah, angel? right there?" he whispered against your lips, his own breath hitching, thick with a gratification at how easily he could make you unravel.
his hands didn't stop their eager wandering; one hand slid up your spine, pressing you firmly against his chest, while his other hand cupped your outer thigh, lifting you just enough to adjust the angle.
he pressed up slightly against you, his gaze tracking the way your lips parted for air under the amber glow.
“yes, fuck. that feels really good,” you moaned, completely losing yourself. you were already getting close.
you weren't even sure if it was because of how long it had been since you last felt him, or if it was simply the overwhelming fact that you were dating jeon fucking jungkook.
he just knew how to treat your body right.
in fact, he was the only one who ever truly knew how to handle you; possesses an innate understanding of every single one of your reactions, managing to treat your body better than you ever could.
another smug grin pulled is jungkook’s lips at your praise, your cursing sounding sweet to his ears.
"i knew it would," he leaned up, his lips brushing hot against your earlobe as his hands continued their relentless sweep across your lower back, pulling the fabric of his collection tighter against you. "you're doing so good for me, angel. keep riding my thigh, just like that."
the buildup of your heat rubbing against his thigh was pushing you right over the edge.
your back arched, fingers clutching desperately now at his firm chest. an intense wave of pleasure rippled through your core, a broken gasp tearing from your throat as you edged closer and closer to your climax.
looking down at his massive chest as your hands gripped him, a surge of clarity hit you through the haze of pleasure.
holding him like this felt entirely different now.
you couldn't help but notice how incredibly buff he had gotten again; his chest and shoulders were thick and solid, while his waist was slim, carrying that same physique he had back when he was in the military. he had always been strong and physically fit, but the tour had made him carve his body into something lethal. made you happy to know he was taking care of his body and eating well while being away from home.
god, you had missed him so much. with him away on tour, the distance had felt like a physical ache.
it had taken so much to finally take a few days off from your job, pack a bag and fly all the way down just to be with him in his hotel room. sitting there waiting for him in his own design. you were nervous your little surprise might be too bold, but feeling his body against yours shattered any lingering doubt.
you were exactly where you belonged.
feeling the contraction of your inner thighs and the way your breathing hitched, his hands clamped around your waist and lifted you effortlessly up off his leg.
before you could register the loss, he pulled you closer, crawling up onto the bed and pressing you flat onto your back in the center of the mattress.
the soft comforter rose around you as your back hit the bed, jungkook hovering over you. his massive frame completely covered you. he pinned your wrists on either side of your head, his calloused fingers locking tightly with yours as his sweaty chest pressed flush against your bralette.
you started to wonder if he was ever going to take it off you or fuck you in it.
as if reading your thoughts, jungkook's gaze dropped down to the piece, eyes lingering on your cleavage.
“thought you wanted to tear this off me,” you whispered, shocking yourself with the teasing tone after what he just put you through on his thigh.
he cocked his head to the side as a smirk replaced his possessive expression. the sound of your voice, trembling but still brave enough to play with him, went straight to his head.
he shifted his weight, making sure not to put any on your frame. he then wedged his thighs between your knees, stretching your legs apart on the mattress as he settled over you.
“i do,” he states, “i wanted to rip it to shreds the second i saw you.”
he slowly let go of you wrists, but you stayed still, eyes locked on his. his tatted hand slid down your front, his palm smoothing over your stomach before his fingers hooked into the band of your underwear, pulling at it. his touch was heavy, eager to map out every single curve of you.
“but i want to admire my masterpiece first.”
his thumb shifted, tracing along the inner edge of the band, sending another jolt directly to your core.
you watched as his gaze dropped, his frame following suit as he began to slide down your body. the heat from his chest left you, replaced by the heat of his breath trailing down your ribs, stomach, moving at a torturous pace towards your center.
your heart hammered against your chest.
he’s finally going to take it off, you thought, a thrill of anticipation shooting through your spine as you waited for his fingers to strip you so he could finally touch you where you wanted him the most.
“you did create such a nice set, baby,” you praised him, genuinely proud of what he had achieved.
jungkook paused, his gaze instantly snapping back up to lock on yours, his face inches away from your core.
his hands, still eager and desperate to be all over you, flexed firmly against your outer thighs, spreading your legs slightly wider.
“i’m not talking about the set.”
a gasp caught in your throat as you watched him press his lips over the soaked fabric of your core.
the item offered zero protection against the piercing heat of his mouth, made even more intense as the cold metal of his lip ring grazed right through his own design.
as his lips sealed over your most sensitive part, a sharp cry tore from your throat, your back arching off the mattress.
the contrast of the fabric being pressed deeply into your sensitized skin by his tongue, paired with the occasional, deliberate drag of his ring, was almost too much to bear.
“baby, please!” you cry, hands reaching down to bury in his hair. you were losing all control as he began to thoroughly devour you through his own design.
“please, what?” he teased, “use your words, angel.”
he didn't care about taking the fabric off anymore; he loved the way he could see the outline of your folds. the way it strained and shifted against his tongue with every desperate tilt of your hips. lifts you slightly off the bed by your thighs to anchor you flush against his face. every deep, deliberate suction of his lips through it sent waves of pleasure straight to your core, driving you closer and closer to the edge.
"take them off, koo, please," you begged, voice cracking, entirely spent. you couldn't handle the barrier anymore, not when you were so close, not when the physical ache of missing him for weeks was culminating in this exact room. "i want to feel you. please, i want you inside me."
he was obsessed when you begged for him; it made him lose control. would do anything you asked him to.
in one swift motion, his hands hooked in the sides of your waistband. a loud riiiiip echoed throughout the suite. your underwear torn under his fingers until you were completely bare to him.
your eyes widened as you let out a shocked gasp, feeling the cool air hit your bare skin.
he actually tore them off you.
you looked down at the ruined underwear in his hands, completely stunned that he had gone through with it.
jungkook let out a genuine laugh at your expression, finding it adorable in such a sexually tense moment. making sure you’re nice and wet for him, he places a kiss over your sensitive heat. leaves a trail up your frame as he crawls right back up between your knees. his massive frame blocked the view as his thighs pinned yours open against the sheets.
“don’t worry, baby,” he reassures you, his hot breath brushing against your parted lips as his hand caresses your face. “i’ll get you a new pair.”
in fact, he’ll get you a thousand new pairs if it means he gets to rip them off of you like that.
wants to do that every night, seven times a day or whatever the lyrics state, fuck.
he didn't give you another second to overthink it.
shifting his hips forward, his large length pressed flush against your aching center through his shorts. it was too much to bear, and he could feel his own restraint snap.
keeping one hand locked firmly on your waist, his other reached down to hook under the elastic of his shorts and underwear. he shoved them down his thick, muscular thighs, kicking them away until there was nothing left between you.
the direct contact of his bare skin against your own sent a shiver straight to your core, a needy whine tearing from your lips.
“such a good girl for me,” he praises, palms sliding back up to frame your hips. “all mine.”
with his eyes locked onto yours, tracking the frantic rise and fall of your chest, he pushed slowly inside you. a broken sob escaped your lips at the overwhelming fullness of him. it’s been so long you almost forgot how big he was.
“fuck,” he groans, “you’re so tight for me, baby.”
he pauses to let you adjust to his length as he completely buries himself within you, his frame tensing as he locks his hips. leaning down, he captured your mouth in another deep, passionate kiss.
“you’re so big, baby,” you moaned against his lips.
his tongue moved in perfect tandem while stretching you, drinking in your muffled whimpers and the sweetness of your gasps as he let you adjust to his size. it was filled with desire, bridging the heavy ache of the past few weeks with the burning reality of the present.
“you’re taking all of me so well, angel,” he pulled back just enough to breathe the praise against your cheek, his hands anchored firmly on your waist as he slowly began to draw back.
a desperate whimper left your lips at the partial loss of his heat, but was swallowed as he rolled his hips forward again, driving all the way in an unhurried stroke that sent a wave of pleasure through you.
“i missed you so much, baby,” you gasped. your head pressed back into the mattress, your vision blurring slightly as the possessive rhythm of his hips began to take over completely.
"i missed you more," he rumbled, heaving chest slick with sweat against yours. “missed having you in my arms. missed your voice, your laugh, the way you smell, the way you taste. but most of all..." he leaned down, his voice dropping into a rough cadence that went straight to your core as he drove deep into you again, "...i missed having my dick deep inside your pussy."
"wh-whose pussy, baby?" you choked out.
“my pussy,”
he decided the slow, teasing pace was officially over; he knew your body was ready for him.
shifting his weight, he began to pound deep into you, hips driving forward as he pounded into your core with a relentless rhythm.
a loud, piercing scream of pleasure tore from your throat, back arching completely off the mattress as the sudden, overwhelming force sent you over the edge. your toes curling into the sheets.
"yes! yes, fuck, jungkook! yours, baby... all yours!" you screamed out, completely undone as he continued to pound into you. “right there, baby, oh my god!”
"yeah? right there?" he growled, the validation of your screams feeding his ego. knows he’ll get a noise complaint. doesn’t care. just wants to keep making you feel good. keep pushing you over the edge. “you’re taking me so good.”
with every relentless, heavy drive of his hips, a loud, shameless squelch echoed loudly, the sound of how completely soaked you were filling the room. you could feel your own slick heat entirely coating him, dripping heavily down his thick shaft with every deep thrust. the excessive friction was maddening, making him grip your waist even tighter as his pace turned completely unhinged.
he let out a groan at the sheer wetness of it all, his jaw clenching tight as he leaned down closer to your ear. "fuck, listen to you," he rasped, his voice thick and completely gone. "you're dripping all over me, angel. so fucking wet for me..."
a dark possessive focus flared in his eyes as he took in your undone state, watching your chest heave wildly.
"whose dick is this, angel?" he growled out, slowing down his hips slightly. "tell me who it belongs to."
"m-me," you sobbed out, your hands clutching desperately at the thick muscles of his arms. "it belongs to me."
a dark, incredibly smug grin pulled at his lips, his thumb brushing hard against your hip bone as he forced a tight, shallow roll of his pelvis. "what does, baby? use your words for me."
"m-my dick," you whimpered, completely undone by the agonizing stretch of him. "it's my dick."
"good girl," he growled, the praise rough and heavy as he picked up the pace in his thrusts.
before you could catch your breath, his tatted hand moved to the lining of your bralette. with a rough tug, he pulled one of your breasts free, baring your warm mound.
head dipped down as his lips captured your peak, playing with you with his tongue while his hips continued driving inside you.
the dual sensation sent an overwhelming rush of white-hot heat to your core.
the transition left you breathless, and you were close again. he could tell.
he abruptly stopped the rhythm, pulling out of you, making you let out a whine at the sudden loss. sliding his hands under your thighs, he stood up, dragging you across the mattress until your hips were resting at the edge of the bed.
“w-what… jungkook, please—” you breathed, your voice trembling as you stared up into his blown-out pupils with your own glassy ones.
he knew exactly what you wanted, and his possessive grin broke through as he stared at your glassy eyes.
"i know, baby," he says, leaning down to catch your chin as he gives you a deep kiss. shifting his weight forward, he placed a pillow beneath your lips, lining himself up to you. “i want you to come all over me; your dick. let me feel exactly how much you missed me, angel."
elevating your hips slightly, he drove forward, burying his massive length inside you in one swift, deep thrust.
you swear you felt your soul leave your body at the depth. a loud, choked sob tore from your throat, your hand going to cup your mouth from being any louder than you already have been.
but jungkook wasn't having any of that.
the instant he buried himself back inside you, his gaze tracked the movement of your hand, going to muffle your pleasure.
he didn’t like that.
immediately wrapped his hand around your wrist and pulled your fingers away from your face.
“don’t do that,” he demanded. he pinned your hand securely to the comforter beside your head, leaning over you so closely that his sweat-slicked chest pressed flush against your bare breast. "i want to hear you, angel. let the whole floor hear how fucking good i make you feel."
to make his point clear, he gripped the back of your thighs, pushing them up to your chest as his torso locked flush over yours.
the shift in the angle intensified the fullness of him inside you, making you let out a high-pitched moan that bounced off the walls of the suite.
with your knees pinned and your lower half entirely open for him, jungkook stood, bracing his abdomen, and began to pound into you, faster and harder.
every single stroke was deeper than the last, hitting your g-spot with such direct accuracy that a tremor slid down your spine. your free hand cupped your clothed breast, while the other grabbed his tatted forearm to move it to your neck.
his veins bulged against your fingers as you guided him to your throat. his eyes flared with a dark pleasure at the request. another breathless chuckle escaped his lips as his palm wrapped around your neck, completely covering it.
his tatted fingers spread wide against your warm skin, his grip tightening around your throat just enough to command your surrender. he choked you firmly, cutting off your breath just enough to make your vision blur at the edges, sending a shockwave of desperation straight to your core.
he leaned down, capturing your mouth in a messy kiss that drank in your broken cries.
the tenderness from before was entirely gone, replaced by a deep, frantic thirst as his lips bruised yours. the now-warm metal of his lip ring caught hungrily against your mouth with every desperate tilt of his head, matching the punishingly unhinged pace of his hips.
"f-fuck, look at you," he breaks the kiss just enough to moan the words against your lips, voice vibrating against your chest. “so wet for me.”
“baby…fuck...i’m gonna come!”
“yeah? come for me baby,” jaw clenched, his own breathing fracturing as his tightly coiled restraint began to snap completely. the friction was too intense, the internal heat of your walls squeezing him so tightly it was driving him over the edge alongside you. "you're ruining me, baby… you're so tight... i'm so close."
"where do you want it, angel?" he gasped out, his voice thick and desperate as his hips hitched, pausing himself deep inside you for a moment. his blown-out eyes locked onto yours, searching your dazed face. "tell me where to come for you."
"inside, baby," you sobbed out, your heels coming up to lock tightly against the back of his neck to pull him even deeper. "i want you inside me... please, come deep inside your pussy."
jungkook lost every remaining ounce of control. he slammed himself inside you, his body tensing as a violent, white-hot release took over his entire frame.
he poured his cum deep inside your core at the same moment your walls violently clamped around his length, committing your mutual ruin.
he held his hips flush against yours, anchoring you firmly under his grip, both of you completely undone.
for a moment, the only sound was your breathing. jungkook slowing moved your legs from his neck, pulling out, watching his release spill out of you.
a breathless sigh escaped his lips, his gaze softening instantly as he looked down at your spent form. "you did so good for me, angel," he murmured, his voice now sweet and gentle as he leaned down to press a soft, lingering kiss to your forehead.
he gently stroked your hair away from your face, his thumb catching a stray tear on your cheek. "just stay right here, okay? don't move."
he carefully slid off the bed, heading into the bathroom. you heard the sound of water running, and a minute later, he returned holding a damp cloth.
kneeling back down between your thighs, his touch became incredibly gentle, a stark contrast to how he was just moments before. he used the warm cloth to clean your thighs and your sensitive center, his eyes filled with a quiet reverence.
“so beautiful,” he whispered, a tender smile tugging at his lips as he wiped away the evidence of his release. "thank you for taking all of me like that, baby. you perfect girl."
once you were clean, he disappeared into the bathroom to clean himself off before returning to the bed. the mattress dipped under his weight as he slid under the comforter beside you, immediately pulling you against his chest. he draped his arm over your waist, anchoring you securely against his warmth.
you both were now covered in sweat and sticky. knew you would need new sheets to sleep in, but neither of you cared right now. you both simply basked in the pure, unhurried feeling of finally being together after so long, that ache finally melting away.
under the soft amber glow of the bedside lamp, you both just stared into each other's eyes, your hands lazily wandering over his chest and arm, tracing his tattoos while he rubbed your back.
you broke the silence first, your voice a whisper that barely carried across the pillows. "did you... did you like your surprise?"
jungkook’s chest rumbled against your hand as a soft chuckle escaped him.
he tightened his grip around your waist, pulling you until your front was pressed flush against his torso, your faces inches apart.
“like it?... i loved it, baby,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to your neck, sending a pleasant shiver down your spine. “i love you so much…i was literally going crazy just wanting to see your face, and walking in to find you waiting for me like this... god, i’m the luckiest man alive to call you mine."
he slid his large, tatted hand up your side, his calloused fingers lightly tracing the embroidery woven into the bralette you still had on. fuck you in it, he had decided.
“you want to know something?” he asked.
you hummed in response, eyes heavy as you relaxed under his touch, a mix jet lag finally getting to you and content of being able to be in his arms again.
"when i was sketching this out for the collection," he whispered, leaning forward to press a tender, lingering kiss to your cheek before trailing down to your jawline, his voice dropping into a soft, prideful cadence. "i was picturing how it would look on you. this... it was designed for you."
he pulled back just enough to lock his deep, devoted eyes with yours, a soft, knowing smile playing on his lips as he leaned in to seal your mouths together in a another lingering kiss.
"but then again," he murmured against your lips, his fingers tangling into your hair to hold you close, "so was i."
the sweetness of his words hung in the warm air, but neither of you was ready to let the quiet take over just yet. a soft giggle vibrated in your throat as you tilted your head up, your lips chasing after his before he could pull away. jungkook let out a breathless chuckle, matching your need instantly.
“you’re such a flirt,” you joked.
“im your flirt,” he returned, “and you love it.”
“mmm, i love you.”
“and i love you, too. so so much.”
eventually, the sticky warmth prompted jungkook to drag you both out of bed and into the steaming shower.
the entire time was spent in a lazy, fogged-up haze under the warm water, the two of you barely separating for even a second. it was a sweet blur of slick palms and quiet laughter as you washed each other's skin; his large hands lingering over your hips while you playfully squeezed his broad shoulders.
so strong, you’d comment. all for you, he’d reply. his words entirely true; every inch of his muscles, every piece of his ink, his whole heart really was designed for you.
even with the water rushing down between you, his mouth constantly chased yours in wet, stolen kisses, matching the gentle slide of the soap until you were both clean and reluctant to step out into the cool room.
while you dried off, he called room service for a late-night meal for the two of you and politely requested a fresh set of sheets.
as you both made the bed, his phone lit up on the nightstand with a buzz. he checked it; a sudden, booming laugh ripping from his chest as he read a text from his group chat.
he proceeded to show you.
the boys had sent a string of messages, complaining that they had to abruptly end their live stream early because you two were being too loud through the walls next to their room.
tossing the device aside with a shake of his head, he pulled your flushed state right back into his arms, reassuring you not to worry about it.
you were all over each other again, a chaotic tangle of limbs and soft sighs under the dim amber glow. every time he broke a kiss to breathe, your mouth followed his, your fingers tracing the firm expanse of his chest. his lips were patient now but still hungry, pressing deep, open-mouthed kisses to the corner of your mouth, your jawline, and the sensitive skin right beneath your ear.
he tasted of devotion. you buried your face in his neck, leaving a trail of gentle, adoring kisses against his warm skin, making him squeeze your waist tight with a quiet, satisfied groan.
“god, i wish we could stay like this forever.” he murmured against your hair. “you were incredible tonight, baby. i still can't believe you're actually here."
"i should be the one saying that to you," you whispered, tilting your head up to find his eyes in the dim light. "especially during the show. you looked so handsome, so confident... i was so incredibly proud of you."
“mmm how about now, huh?” he teased, nudging his thigh slightly between yours to spark a faint, lingering wave of friction.
“yah, watch yourself,” you teased back. “i’m still recovering from earlier.”
“alright, alright. i’ll be good,” he chuckled, a smirk spreading across his face. “for now.”
“you better be,” you smiled against his chest, pulling back to look into his eyes. “i mean it though, koo…i’m proud of you.”
a touched look replaced the playful glint in his eyes. he leaned over to catch your lips in a lazy, sweet kiss. he drank in your praise like a man starving, his grip on your waist tightening just a hair.
“i wish you could have been there, angel,” he whispered against your lips. “the crowd was insane, but i kept wishing to see you in it. i want you at the next one so bad.”
little did he know, you already had tickets to his next show, all three days' worth. it had taken a lot of careful planning without him finding out, but seeing his reaction tonight made every ounce of effort completely worth it.
but for now, you kept that beautiful secret to yourself, letting out a soft, innocent hum as you lazily wrapped your leg over his waist. "mmm, i know, baby. but you're going to do amazing regardless. and i’ll be cheering for you as always."
jungkook shifted slightly, his gaze dropping down to your chest. “by the way,” his finger trailing lightly along the band. “what do you think about the set? does it feel alright?”
“it’s really comfy,” you smiled, leaning up to press a quick kiss to his jaw. "and... i do feel incredibly sexy." you paused, a playful pout forming on your lips as you nudged his chest. "though, i'm not gonna lie... i'm a little jealous that army gets to wear it with your ink embroidered on it now."
jungkook let out a low chuckle, his eyes darkening with a sudden, intense seriousness as he shook his head.
"baby, it's completely different," he reassured you, “it’s just a design.”
his tatted hand moved down your front, his index finger tracing the familiar lines of your skin. he dragged his inked finger with the exact design up along your collarbone, over your neck, and finally traced the plush curve of your bottom lip. “this one? it’s all reserved for you. no one else gets the real thing.”
watching his eyes flare, you caught his hand, guiding his finger directly past your lips and into your mouth. you wrapped your tongue around it, sucking gently while keeping your eyes locked onto his blown-out pupils.
a groan ripped from jungkook's throat, his frame tensing as you got him hot and bothered all over again. you pulled his finger out from your mouth with a slick pop, his breathing turning shallow as his other hand clamped tightly over your hip.
"are you sure you can't go another round?" he rasped out, his jaw clenched as he stared down at you.
"mmm... i could be persuaded," you teased back.
"god, you are such a naughty girl." a defeated chuckle escaped his lips as he leaned down, completely helpless against the pull of you.
"you love it," you replied, a smug, pretty smile playing on your lips as you used his own words from earlier.
"i love you," he corrected softly, his intense gaze melting into something so deeply devoted it made your heart skip a beat. he leaned in, brushing his lips against yours. "so much."
"i love you too, baby," you whispered back against his mouth, your fingers tangling into his hair to pull him down into another deep, unhurried kiss. "so, so much."
it was an endless, affectionate loop; shifting positions just to feel his bare skin against yours, pulling the comforter over your shoulders only to tangle your legs back together beneath it. safe in his arms, listening to the rhythmic thud-thud of his heart right against yours, you finally allowed yourself to drift off.
you closed your eyes with a soft, lingering smile, completely wrapped up in the ultimate reality that he hadn't just crafted a masterpiece for the world to see tonight.
it was beautifully clear that jeon jungkook was entirely, uniquely designed for you, and so were you.
⟢ MEET THE WRITER & PLEASE READ THE RULES BEFORE REQUESTING.
⟢ REQUESTS ARE CLOSED BUT FEEL FREE TO STOP BY AND CHAT.
⟢ Currently: New batch of requests are being worked on.
⟢ Masterlist last updated: 5/18.
☆ YOU SLEEP, I YEARN SERIES☆
*⁀➷ It started with just a little chat with your local Eridian about your feelings for a certain blonde haired, blue eyed Molecular Biologist. How did we end up here, heartbroken?
★ Reason is Life.
*⁀➷ There was a lot to think about when asked about the future.
★ Spin the Bottle.
*⁀➷ Let's play a game about your feelings for the Molecular Biologist.
★ Coffee Facts.
*⁀➷ Time to schedule a date about coffee.
★ Midnight Oil.
*⁀➷ Ryland falls asleep at his work station. You make sure he's comfy.
★ Discovery
*⁀➷ You learn Ryland is being sent on the mission. Unwillingly.
★ Permanent Wound.
*⁀➷ You learn about one of Ryland's little secrets.
★ Being Sick. ( Stratt's Vat. )
*⁀➷It can't be that easy getting you to lay down when sick, right? Right.
★ Doomed, Appearently.
*⁀➷You and Ilyukhina are having a few drinks together on Stratt's Vat during a celebration that has no real purpose.
★ After Hours Statistic.
*⁀➷ You and Ryland stay behind after a school dance to clean up.
★ Bike Duo.
*⁀➷Ryland's attempt at creating a Bike Bus is derailed. ( Or is it? )
★ Wingman-Classroom.
*⁀➷Ryland gets analyized. By his own his students. About his feelings. For you.
★ Mixer Mix-Up.
*⁀➷You and Ryland gravitated towards one another during a Teacher's Event.
★ Doctor, oh Doctor.
*⁀➷You learn about Ryland's dirty little secret. His Doctorate.
★ Jealousy, Jealousy.
*⁀➷Ryland learns a little something about a nasty human emotion.
★ Paperbacks, Broken Backs. ( LIbrarian!Reader. )
*⁀➷Ryland Grace introduces himself to the new Librarian - you.
★ The Five Essay Break.
*⁀➷After a rough week at work, Ryland finds you on the verge of a breakdown and consoles you best he can.
★ Teacher Appreciation Day.
*⁀➷It's Teacher Appreciation Day, everyone!!! Let's celebrate.
★ Eridian Interruption.
*⁀➷You and Ryland are putting up Rocky's enclosure together.
★ Observation King.
*⁀➷Rocky is full of facts. About you. About Ryland. About you and Ryland together.
★ Human Accessories 101.
*⁀➷Rocky notices something new about you - Piercings!
★ Picture Perfect. ( ANGST. )
*⁀➷Ryland Grace only has one photo in his belongings. Who took it and why?
★ I'm Just Ryland. ( And I'm a Scientist! )
*⁀➷It's movie night on Board the Hail Mary! Your choice? Barbie. Ryland's choice was ignored. It was Stargate.
★ Interruption. ( Drabble. )
*⁀➷Slice of life. Rocky has no sense of privacy. You should've known better.
★ Karaoke. ( Drabble. )
*⁀➷You are... My fire... With Rocky. And Ryland. None of you sing on key but that's okay!
★ Biodome, Sweet Biodome.
*⁀➷It's your first night in the Biodome, apart but together.
★ Adrian Chat.
*⁀➷You and Adrian are having a lively chat about your choice in mates.
★ Kissing Stars, Kissing Skin.
*⁀➷ You find yourself awake in the middle of the night to admire Ryland, even the parts of himself that are the most vulnerable. ( BOOK SPOILERS. )
★ Meet The Pebbles.
*⁀➷Rocky and Adrian come visit you and Ryland along with 5 new additions.
★ Never Got Your Name.
*⁀➷Ryland meets his match after a bump in at the college cafe. Consequences loading. ( College. )
★ Amateur Astronomers.
*⁀➷Astronomy Club President Ryland Grace convinces you to go on a late night field trip. ( College. )
★ In the Clouds Consequences. ( ANGST )
*⁀➷Breaking up is hard to do for anyone. Especially Ryland Grace. ( College. )
★ Experimental Alcohol.
*⁀➷You finally get Ryland to go to a college party.
★ Stairwell Trajectory Mishap.
*⁀➷It was a long work day. Why is there a cute stranger in the stairwell trying to get his bike upstairs?
★ Event Horizon.
*⁀➷Ryland tries to be a big baddie with you on a date and you two end up going to an amusement park.
★ Mother's Day Variables.
*⁀➷Mother's Day Breakfast is a tradition Ryland takes very seriously.
★ The Very Hungry Metamorphosis.
*⁀➷Ryland reads his baby a bed time story and it causes him to ramble. Just a bit.
★ The 'Just In Case' Moment.
*⁀➷You and Ryland Grace are about to do it for the first time but... Things don't go according to plan.
★ Rain Between Fingers.
*⁀➷Cuddling on the couch, movie playing. Ryland knew what he was doing when he placed his head in your lap.
★ Misson Control to Little Star.
*⁀➷Ryland has a little chat with his unborn baby.
★ Ryland Airlines.
*⁀➷Ready for take off! You tell Ryland he needs to get some rest. There's detours on the way to the bed.
★ The Space Between Us.
*⁀➷Ryland is up early thinking about his future with you, and his baby.
★The Third Date Hypothesis.
*⁀➷You're out on your third date with Ryland Grace who is, let's face it, a bit of a nervous wreck.
★ From Microscopes to Soccer Balls. ( Gender Neutral!Reader. )
*⁀➷Ryland Grace. Molecular Biologist. Teacher. Girl Dad. Soccer Dad.
★ Primigravida Confession. ( Female!Reader. )
*⁀➷Telling Ryland you're pregnant.
★ Dine N' Dash(ing.) ( Server!Reader. )
*⁀➷Slices of Life. You serve Ryland at the local diner he stops at everday.
★ Spitting Facts.
*⁀➷You and Ryland go on a date to Muir Woods. He can't shut-up about it!
★ Big Welcome. ( Female!Reader. )
*⁀➷Ryland holding his daughter for the first time.
★ Ryland Grace / Mark Watney.
*⁀➷Ryland discovers you're dating a potentially famous Astronaut from Chicago.
★ Ryland Grace - Types of Kisses.
*⁀➷Slices of life. What types of kisses would Ryland Grace give?
★ Decompression. ( FEMALE READER, NSFW. ) 18+
*⁀➷Ryland hears about a certain... Position and he was a little nervous asking you to try it out.
★Spatial Awareness. ( FEMALE READER, NSFW. ) 18+
*⁀➷Your very shy and cute boyfriend invites you over to his place for the first time.
★ Birds, Bees & Beatles. ( FEMALE READER, NSFW ) 18+
*⁀➷Explaining this to a group of teens was so much easier. Who's idea was this?
★ Heavy Handed Science Lesson. ( FEMALE READER, NSFW) 18+
*⁀➷Ryland tries his hand at dirty talking. It goes well! ( In your opinion. )
★ Relaxing Blow to the Head. ( GN READER, NSFW ) 18+
*⁀➷Ryland is stuck at school on a Friday grading. He needs to relax ( with your help. )
★ In The Airwaves. ( FEMALE READER, NSFW. ) 18+
*⁀➷Ryland is away on a teaching confrence and misses you a bit too much.
★ Ryland Grace NSFW Headcanons. 18+
★ MORE Ryland Grace NSFW Headcanons. 18+
Additionally, I do not consent to my work being used in AI , AI training, AI generation, or any artificial intelligence program for any purpose, including reproduction, adaptation, or machine learning.
Please respect creators and support original writing.
life was supposed to go forward the way you had always been told.
find someone, fall in love, get married, have kids.
that was the formula - the routine of every day life that you, yourself, had agreed to. it was supposed to be easy and carefree, the type of love that felt natural and yet definite. it was supposed to be certain.
jeon jungkook.
the love of your life. no one, nothing, could compare to him; the one constant in your life since you were no older than five. two years older than you, he had been the object of your infatuations even then, and though you both harboured a crush on one another as you grew up, it was only when you were 14 that you both actually pursued something.
you both came from broken homes, with your parents entangled in the world of drugs and abuse, his absent more times than present. you had each other though, and that was all either of you had ever really needed - that much had been true for years. it didn’t take long to fall in love with him, not when he treated you like blooming flowers in the first touch of spring; you were more than just his girl. you were his y/n.
no one blinked when he proposed, everyone half expecting it, and neither of you had wanted to wait to plan a lavish wedding when you were both the only constants in each other’s lives. and so, with cheap rings, a random dress you had found at the bottom of your wardrobe and his scuffed shoes - you had become husband and wife.
jungkook was the best partner you could have ever asked for. money was tight in the beginning as he threw himself into his job, making sure he had enough to spoil you rotten even if that meant coming home exhausted. it killed you to see him working so hard, but he never complained, not even once. it was done in the pursuit of his sweet wife, and therefore just.
he quickly began climbing the ranks, his intelligence unmatched, his speed and efficiency making him a force to be reckoned with. in a mere seven years, he had managed to go from the lowest ranking worker in the company right to head office, before formally being announced as ceo.
it was unheard of. people like him, people like you, they didn’t live like this. it felt like over night your entire life had changed, as the tiny, one bed apartment transformed into a penthouse suite in your city’s most reputable area, your beaten down car now more lavish than you could ever dream of. your clothes - silks, linens and luxurious patterns. you were a changed woman, all at the hands of your husband.
that was when the cracks had began to form.
the late nights began, jungkook holed up in his office for far longer than anyone else at the company, stacks of paper all around as he tried to crack numbers before the next day could bring its own workload. you didn’t mind at first, more so worried over anything else.
you packed late dinners, going up to his office and eating them with him just to keep him company, to ground him which he needed more than you could ever realise. he would sit you on his lap as he worked, all whilst you napped peacefully on his shoulder as though this was perfectly normal.
the first few months, it worked. after that, it could no longer hide the gaping hole that had begun to appear.
missed dinners. missed dates. jungkook showing up at two in the morning despite everyone else going home at five in the afternoon - this wasn’t normal. wasn’t healthy. the amount of arguments that were being caused due to his workaholic nature was alarming, especially considering neither of you had ever even raised your voices to one another prior to this.
your heart was getting heavier and heavier.
not because you doubted his love for you - that wasn’t even a question in your mind, that much was certain. if anything, jungkook loved you too much, entirely and wholly, with every single decision made in his life somehow tracing back to you in one way or another. whether it was purchasing things, buying them with the intent of impressing you, making you happy or smile. every opportunity, every signed contract, every bastard fucking meeting that he could feel so deeply in his bones was done with the intention of giving you a life so soft you would never experience hardship again.
that was where the problem lay.
jungkook didn’t know how to love in a way that could nurture your relationship through this, and so, he did the only thing he could. he sacrificed.
slowly, painfully, the realisation that somewhere between the neglect, the late nights and unanswered phone calls, your husband had stopped being your husband at all. he had become a mere ghost in your shared home.
the night you had made your decision was one that felt imprinted in your memory.
it was past midnight, the harsh light of your phone reminding you with each passing moment. the rain was harsh too, with it being the middle of autumn, causing you to curl deeper into the covers on your bed but it did nothing to chase the cold away. dinner had long gone cold downstairs, with your housekeeper giving you a long, sad look before leaving to her own home, patting you on the shoulder in comfort.
your heart hurt so fucking much.
your phone was untouched, with messages sent hours prior despite the lack of response.
‘where are you?’
‘are you coming home tonight?’
‘jungkook, you promised.’
‘i miss you.’
you felt pathetic. humiliation ran up and down your veins at the thought of having to beg for a morsel of attention from your husband, but what else were you supposed to do? what else could you do? loneliness had a tendency to do that to people.
the sound of the front door finally opening had your eyes looking up, no longer staring into space, thinking. overthinking.
jungkook finally stumbled in, hours and hours late, shoulders tense and black coat half wet due to the rain outside. his phone had died hours ago, and his brain was a jumble of numbers and stakeholders, still muttering under his breath over something one of his colleagues had said. he was exhaustion personified.
“baby.” he exhaled deeply upon the sight of you still up.
1:47am.
you stared at him, unable to focus on anything in particular as your reddened eyes somehow glinted in the moonlit essence of the room. his heart ached.
“you missed it again.” you whispered, barely audible.
another dinner sat cold. jungkook had noticed it on his way up, muttering a small fuck under his breath, but seeing you now? something had changed, something was different and the sight scared him to death.
“i know, i..”
“you said you’d be home for six.”
“i know baby, i’m so sorry, we had an emergency shareholders meeting and it was just..fuck.”
“it’s always an emergency.” you muttered bitterly.
the silence that followed felt suffocating to you both.
he carefully placed his things at the door before approaching you slowly, as though you were a wounded fawn struck by an arrow from his own back - it was his fault. he knew that, he could see it.
“i’m trying.” he whispered softly, as he crouched to meet your eyes.
that was the worst thing of all - of course he was trying. you knew he was, you could see it in every single thing he did but that was the part that made it so much more painful. it was unbearable.
tears burned harshly behind your eyes, lip openly trembling as you stared at the only man to have ever felt your affection, the love of your life. the same man that would set himself on fire just to keep you warm, who had done this all for you - even you knew that but, the pain. you weren’t sure when loving him had started to hurt this badly.
“i don’t need..i don’t want any of this, jungkook.” you corrected as your voice cracked, hands gesturing to the too large room. “don’t care about penthouses or cars, or money..”
“it’s not about that.”
“then what is it about?” you cried, months and months of neglect finally collapsing all at once. “because i’m losing you anyway.”
the devastation that appeared on his face would have floored you on any other occasion, but the horrible feeling that had taken over was consuming you from the inside out. you couldn’t rid yourself of your thoughts, the looming decision that had grown and grown and grown, so much so that it felt bigger than you in both mind and body. you couldn’t stop the tears even if you wanted to.
“i feel so lonely.” you admitted honestly, a broken sob leaving your lips. “you’re all i have..all i’ve ever had and i feel lonely.”
the words physically wounded him as he felt his own tears begin to form, a horrible realisation fluttering through his body - this wasn’t fixable. he could see it now, the utter pain in your eyes, the way your body shook as you cried, and though he was crouched in front of you, arms wrapping around you; it wasn’t enough.
“i’ll fix this. i’ll fix this, fuck. y/n..” he shook, holding you so tightly, his heart beating out of his chest. “give me time. give me a chance. give me something, give me anything.”
you only cried harder at his words, collapsing entirely as the sobs racked through your body violently. you knew he meant it, knew he meant every single word, and you genuinely believed it too but you were tired.
so, so tired.
you knew that the love between you, no matter how deep, could not survive on patched up apologies and promises no longer.
the separation happened three weeks later.
perhaps that was too cruel of you - you should have given him more time, more chances, another opportunity to prove himself to you so he could actually begin repairing something that had already long collapsed before he had ever realised the damage. staying felt too painful, as though you were prodding delicate skin with a million sharpened blades. for once in your entire existence, you chose yourself.
you hated yourself for it.
you could no longer survive off of the memories of who your husband had once been, the once sweet teenage boy who slept on the streets with you just so you’d feel safe from the grasps of your parents. the man who had ran home to tell you about his promotion, who then sobbed in your arms at the mere prospect of getting to give you the life you deserved. oh, how each and every fibre of your being yearned for him, how it knew him by breath alone and yet it wasn’t enough. nothing could possibly hurt more.
packing your things nearly killed him. you remembered it vividly.
jungkook stood silently in the doorway of your shared bedroom, watching numbly, as though his soul had left his entire body as you packed up remnants of a life once shared with him. cardboard boxes were filled with your books, your makeup, your silly trinkets you had acquired together - the sight of you crying as you packed your wedding album so delicately was enough to have him bite back his own sob, shaking his head at the reality of the situation.
he hadn’t stopped you. it was the worst part.
jungkook was intimidating to most; hardened by his life experiences and the struggle he had been raised in, his only priority for the past decade being you. you didn’t like to go into his work, knowing he was quite literally a different person there - efficient, yes, but also ruthless. and yet, he stood, watching you as though his eyes couldn’t comprehend the scene in front of him, tears wiped harshly from his face in fear that it would only upset you more.
even in moments like this, he put you first.
his hands sat caged on either side of him, as you sobbed, and sobbed and sobbed. he wanted nothing more than to pick you up, cradle you, cherish you the way he so desperately wanted but in his love for you came your happiness. he was a man devoted to you, and he couldn’t cage you somewhere you no longer felt happy staying - he loved you too much to ever do that.
the divorce proceedings were somehow so much worse.
the media frenzy surrounding jeon jungkook, the elusive ceo who was known for his mysterious persona and dark eyes, was quite literally unbearable. the sudden separation exploded all over the tabloids and the internet, with headlines appearing faster than either of you could keep up with. the hate was too much, to which jungkook stepped in to silence everyone behind the scenes, throwing an insane amount of money at journalists to keep your name out of their filthy mouths. wife or not, you were one half of him and he’d be damned if you were spoken of in anyway that wasn’t praiseworthy.
you couldn’t even look at him during the hearings.
god, you tried. you wanted to, managing to sneak little glances where you caught him already staring at you, despair all over his face, but you couldn’t handle it, tears streaming out of your eyes almost immediately. he knew you loved him. he could see it, clear as day.
he looked sick, as though he hadn’t eaten for weeks, the mere sight of you enough to sustain him until the next meeting, where your feet lightly brushed against one another underneath the table in a subconscious way.
he barely spoke, only choosing to actually speak when he was asked a question, but other than that, he spent his time in the meetings staring at you longingly. he’d whisper a soft “don’t cry” whenever he’d see you tear up, your lip quivering each time you snuck a glance over, despite knowing it was breaking you.
he signed everything over to you immediately. his lawyers had practically choked, eyes wide as he silenced them almost harshly for even suggesting anything otherwise, your own eyebrows pulling together as you tried to reject. you didn’t want his money, you didn’t want what he had worked so hard for.
the penthouse, the cars, the accounts. every. fucking. thing.
“jungkook..” you had whispered through tears at the table, addressing him for the first time in so long. “i don’t want any of this, it’s yours. you’ve worked so hard.”
hearing you was enough to provide the energy he had been lacking, the very blood in his bloodstream pumping harder as he shook his head at you, offended.
“i got those things for you. it never belonged to me..was always yours.” he whispered back, causing you to look down with another choked sob.
it was the final hearing that truly cemented the empty hole inside of you.
your hands shook violently, so much so that you were unable to pick up your pen and sign away your marriage, the one thing you needed to do to finally let him go. everyone in the room frowned as they watched you, face flooded with tears as your digits simply refused, as though your body rejected the notion as being entirely unnatural. they all felt pity for you, for both of you - you both were clearly in love, and they couldn’t understand the gravity of the situation between you.
jungkook had stood from his side of the table, walking over to you until his hand had softly encapsulated your own, your quiet sobs only growing harsher at the feel of the one person you had been craving for so long. he held it, guiding you to your own, helping you write your name on the dotted line despite every part of his body aching.
ex-husband.
the thought should have killed you.
once it was signed, he held onto your hand, too scared to let go as the documents were taken, your lawyers and his slowly leaving the room, leaving you be. you should have let go, should have pushed him away as he no longer had any tie to you - you weren’t married, you weren’t together. alas, the thought felt sacrilegious.
instead, he knelt, knees hitting the hardened floor below you as your red eyes met his properly. entirely.
“i’ll fix this.” he promised you, voice no longer shaking, as you could hear the depth of his promise to you. “i don’t care how long it takes, baby, but you’ll come back to me. i’ll come back to you better, i’ll be worthy. i promise you, y/n.” he whispered.
another sob climbed up your throat, mean and harsh, as your body collapsed against the chair you were sat in, your emotion taking a complete hold over you.
because even then, after everything, you knew his words to be true. you knew home would be waiting.
—
eight months had passed now, and soon came the first touch of summer. the bleak sky had become brighter, clouds hibernating and birds chirping as the world became warmer, accommodating for the transition into what most would describe as a joyous time. unfortunately for you, your body was still recovering from what could only be described as the most traumatic stage of your life thus far.
everything felt unnatural and wrong - you were trying to keep up despite it moving a million miles around you.
even after all this time, your stomach still dropped whenever you’d see anything that referred to him as your ex husband, as though your mind and heart needed a moment to catch up. how could jungkook ever simply become an ex anything to you?
he had existed in your life for so long that removing him felt akin to ripping a vital organ out of your body, all whilst expected to function entirely normally. how could you? you suppose you were failing, really, with the way you moved through life out of necessity instead of want.
the tabloids loved him now more than ever. it was the paradox of tragedy, you assumed, as you knew how badly the world yearned for a broken hearted lover.
the youngest ceo in the country’s history, a billionaire bachelor - the elusive businessman was on the top of every social hierarchy, whilst people spoke about you in hushed whispers. the only woman to have ever gotten away. who were you? why did you leave? why did he leave you with so much?
he had become so much colder after the divorce, and people picked up on it like rats with forgotten food.
the media had always labelled him as an intimidating man, but now, there was no way of denying it. there was something unsettling about the pictures that were being papped of him, your hungry eyes taking him in top to bottom, nibbling your lip - he looked so different. broad shoulders remained the same, but he seemed bigger, no doubt taking out his pain in the gym. it was the look in his eyes, however, that had your stomach in knots.
he looked dead whilst alive.
jeon jungkook was heartbroken, and the world knew it clear as day.
he had dealt with it the only way he knew how - by burying himself six feet deep into his work, knowing he had nothing to come home to, often times sleeping in his office just so he could ignore the silence of his house.
meanwhile, you had spent the last eight months trying to learn how to exist without him.
the humiliation at first was all you were reminded of, as you realised how deeply you had intertwined into him and vice versa. the silence in your once shared penthouse was so unbearable that you had moved into a tiny two bedroom apartment, using the spare as a storage unit for all of your books. on your nightstand still sat a picture of you both, as you secretly cried over it most nights. you couldn’t even sleep unless you wore one of his hoodies, despite his scent having washed off months ago - it was the comfort of knowing you still had a part of your marriage with you.
you missed him in every small, stupid, awful way imaginable.
the feeling of his hand, heavy and strong, on your thigh as he drove you around. the way he would cage you into any surface he could find just to smother you in kisses, or even the way he would whisper into your ear stupid jokes that had you giggling too loudly for the world to hear.
you missed your husband. you missed jungkook.
everyday you battled with the regret of your choice, especially once you’d see the way his under-eyes had sunken with the lack of sleep and yet you couldn’t bring yourself to admit it out loud. you couldn’t live that way again, not with the neglect - not with your past trauma from your parents.
jungkook knew the gravity of his actions, knew you needed to heal and reason with them before he could come back to you but fuck, it hurt so bad to wait.
sometimes, during your weaker moments, you found yourself searching him into your phone in the dead of night, breathing out an audible sigh of relief at the confirmation he was still openly single. it was pathetic, that much you knew, but it was selfish beyond anything else. so cruel to want the man you left to be alone, simply because he still belonged to you.
you had attempted to rebuild your life slowly, carefully piecing together fragments of yourself that existed before all of this had happened. your days were quieter now, so much lonelier but it was enough to keep your mind from spiralling every second of every waking day.
some habits, however, refused to die.
his contact remained as the only favourited number in your phone, as you spent all of your time rereading old messages, despite it ending in tears. if only you knew he too did the same, with his photo album on his phone his most used app as he stared at you nightly, often falling asleep with your picture shining brightly on his screen.
you still loved him. he loved you even more.
that could never change.
-
the first flowers came on a random tuesday.
you had just experienced one of the worst days you’d had in a while, with a final meeting with one of your clients going to shit after you realised hours of work and designs had somehow corrupted, and then deleted. by the time you had returned home, you were sure the world had seen your teary state, your body heavier than usual.
as you searched your bag for your keys, your eyes peered up, noticing them.
your breath caught.
sitting neatly outside your apartment door. a bouquet, large but elegant - white gardenias. the flowers you had held at not only your wedding, but the ones jungkook would buy you for your anniversary each year.
your flowers.
your chest ached so violently you found yourself gasping for air as your legs gave out below you. you slid down the wall, fingers brushing against the delicate petals as you looked for a note, only to realise there wasn’t one. you didn’t need to see who they were from, only one person knew you well enough and your heart felt like it had been split into two as you took them in.
it wasn’t your anniversary, wasn’t any special kind of occasion, and yet here they were. bright, promising, sweet.
your vision blurred with heavy tears as the painful feeling in your body grew, throat tightening with emotion before reaching out and taking a hold of them, breathing the flowers in openly.
the scent alone was enough to destroy you.
he was everywhere, all of the time - even now. especially now.
the flowers had become a norm, a pattern that was only recognisable to you, and completely deniable to any other person looking in. you were smarter than you looked and you knew what was happening, and yet you couldn’t bring yourself to call it out.
your favourite restaurant somehow managing to accommodate you always despite the line or packed out reservations list, or the paparazzi that often bullied you for your attention outside of your home mysteriously disappearing. even your car, that you had dented slightly, appeared in perfect condition as you walked down to go to work one morning, your eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
your chest bloomed with realisation.
jungkook.
he never appeared himself, no. never. it was unsettling really, the reminder that he was powerful and could have things done with a flick of his wrist - he was sure to never make you privy to it, so you’d always feel like he was the same boy you had met all those years ago. now? he had every intention of showing you the empire he had built for you and you alone. he lingered around you and your life like a floating ghost, invisible but permanent. you truly couldn’t get rid of him even if you tried.
three weeks later is when you felt yourself reaching breaking point.
for the first time in months, you were finally leaving the house to actually do something for fun. your best friend, yejin, who’s husband yoongi was ironically jungkook’s best friend, had forced you to come out for a drink. nothing intense, merely a nice bar where the drinks were smooth and the company was good, with slow jazz playing in the back.
exhaustion was heavy in your bones but you listened, doing your best to make yourself look nice despite how dead you felt inside. a little skirt that felt too short and a top that perhaps plunged too low - yejin had deemed you utterly perfect.
sat at the bar, you sipped your drink, wincing lightly as she yapped away about something her coworker had said. you appreciated how she refused to bring jungkook up, knowing that she couldn’t breach the topic unless you were the one to bring it up yourself. you hated how badly you wanted to, how desperate you were to find out how he was doing.
she filled the air constantly, like she was terrified of what would happen if your mind caught up to the reality of the situation, instead filling it with nonsense to occupy your demanding thoughts.
you let her.
you even found yourself laughing, the feeling and sound so startling that it reduced you to silence for a full minute afterwards as you welcomed the feeling of actual joy for the first time in so long.
you almost didn’t notice the shift in your phone, the slight light radiating from beneath as you had turned it onto its screen earlier in the evening. she, however, paused mid sentence, eyes dropping down to let you know someone was ringing.
nothing could have prepared you for the sight of his name on the screen.
the name, ‘kookie’ with a large, red heart adorned your phone as humiliation rummaged through you at the realisation you had never even bothered to change his name, the concept too painful to come to terms with. however, yejin all but gasped as she turned to you, eyes widened with an almost excitement.
“answer it.” she encouraged, hand on your back. “i’ll watch your drink.”
you weren’t sure what to say, as you nodded, staring down at the screen before shakily sliding off of your seat and heading towards the back entrance, where a smokers area sat empty. your hands shook as you cupped the phone to your chest, taking a seat before looking down at it once more.
he was calling you.
jungkook was fucking calling you.
before you could overthink, you swiped, answering it.
the phone felt hot against your ear, a reminder of what was currently happening as your heart began beating harder than it had in months, your hands shaking. for a second, neither of you spoke.
you could hear faint movement on his end, a shuffling of some sorts before he completely stilled, as though he had pushed everything he was doing to a side at the realisation you had actually answered.
“hi.”
god. your eyes squeezed shut tight almost immediately.
there he was - your jungkook. not the ceo extraordinaire that was plastered on every publication you could find, with dead eyes and a sharp expression. no, this was him. jungkook. your jungkook.
the sound alone nearly brought you to tears. you felt so pathetic.
“hi.” you whispered back, voice cracking.
silence settled again, but not awkwardly. you didn’t think an awkward silence was capable of existing between you, not when your bodies were so intertwined and so aware of one another. the distance between you was unnatural, neither of your minds able to comprehend an eight month hiatus enough to understand that this phone call alone shouldn’t have been happening.
he exhaled slowly, and your shoulders gently relaxed, your eyes closing momentarily as you imagined him. no doubt still at work, in a suit unbuttoned at the shirt, his tie long forgotten. his tattooed hand running through his hair, ruffling it the way you always would.
“you answered.” he broke you out of your thoughts.
your chest tightened painfully at the sheer disbelief in his tone.
“you called.”
a faint huff of amusement left him then, causing you to blink back any emotion that was building in your eyes. it eased you.
“yeah.” he breathed out.
another pause.
you felt so suddenly aware of yourself - your hand reached out to smooth down your hair, adjust your top and skirt, despite knowing he couldn’t see you. it was subconscious, as though the thought of him alone was enough to undo you, but his voice? hearing it after so long, directed at you, for you. yours. it was enough to have you soothed for months.
before you could spiral in your thoughts, he spoke again.
“where are you?”
“out with yejin.”
“mm.” you shivered at his hum. you had no idea he was so undone at the sound of you too. “a bar?”
“yeah.”
“you drinking?”
you rolled your eyes, tongue poking your cheek at his curiosity. some things truly had never changed.
“why?” you asked, and you could almost hear his grin on the other end. “can’t i ask?”
his tone, smooth. familiar. fuck, it did things to you, and you could feel your thighs pressing together just listening to him. secretly, your favourite part of jungkook was how possessive he had always been, and even in moments like this where he hid it under a layer of calmness, you could recognise it instantly.
it reminded you of when he’d ask you whether you had eaten, just before pulling you into his lap, lips attacking the side of your neck hungrily or when he’d tell you to take your medicine, with a slow ‘baby’ and kisses planted to your forehead and cheeks.
“one drink.” you revealed, with a nibble to your lip.
you had no idea that he too was a fucking mess.
jungkook was indeed in his office, with his legs spread, suit jacket and tie somewhere, his shirt unbuttoned a little as he too drank. a cup of whiskey in his hand, his hair a mess as he scoured over your instagram for the millionth time just that day. neither of you were ones to post much, especially considering your accounts were private with only a few people, but he stalked you daily in hopes of a glimpse of you. could you blame him? he was utterly, devotedly in love with you.
a measly divorce couldn’t stop that.
seeing yejin’s story, with your low cut top, and your big eyes showing a sign of life for the first time in months made his heart bloom. it had his cock straining, again, just looking at you, eyes hungrily looking over every inch of you and your soft smile. god, how he had missed it.
he had given you your time. respected your wishes, allowed you eight months of this but enough was enough. the flowers were just the beginning, marking his space back in your life through a promise he had every intention of upholding. he had told you directly he was going to fix this, and you, his sweet, sweet girl had believed him.
he would never let you down again.
“you having fun?”
“why do you wanna know every single detail?” you asked, tone a little harsher than intended but you couldn’t help yourself. this was an ambush on your senses.
he huffed once more, the amusement enough to disarm you.
“because i miss you.”
the words left him so easily that the breath in your lungs completely dissipated, leaving you a statued mess. no hesitation, no shame - pure, devastating honesty.
“you can’t say that, jungkook.” you weakly combatted, the intake of breath on his side of the phone at the sound of his name leaving your mouth enough of an answer for you.
“why not? i can’t miss my wife?” he scoffed lightly at you.
you blubbered for a moment. “i-i am not..i’m not your wife!”
“okay.” he hummed once more.
there was a quiet clink on his end, no doubt picking his drink up and taking a big gulp after abandoning it the second you answered. neither of you spoke for a few more moments, silence now becoming a running theme between you on the call, and yet it was still void of the awkwardness you’d find anywhere else. it was awful how familiar it felt. how comfortable and safe.
your fingers played with the hem of your skirt nervously, unsure if you had been too brash - he was hurting too after all.
“is that top new?”
your breath caught.
“..what?”
jungkook stayed quiet for an extra beat. “your top. haven’t seen that one before.”
heat flooded your cheeks, chest and neck before you could even respond, your lips bitten down as you inhaled shakily.
“how do you know that?” you were ignoring the way your pulse was hammering against your body, trying to feign an air of nonchalance.
at that, he couldn’t help the small grin. “saw you on yejin’s story.” he murmured, quieter now. “look so good. love when you wear pink, baby.”
it wasn’t even the words he had chosen, but more so the way he was saying them. so calm, so certain, so casual as if he wasn’t calling his ex wife baby over a bit of cleavage that was never really meant for his eyes - your blush spreading all over you now.
“jungkook..” you breathed out, shakily.
“what?” he asked innocently, and you could really hear the smile in his voice now. “am i wrong?”
you looked down at your top, nibbling away at your lip to hide the small smile that was beginning to form on your own face, something that you hadn’t felt in a long, long time. your fingers brushed against your stomach, feeling the fabric before tucking a strand behind your hair.
“it’s new.” you admitted softly, heels shuffling slightly on the ground.
the sound he made in response was enough to ruin you. not a laugh, not quite a sigh - something pleased.
he hummed. “so pretty.”
your eyes squeezed shut, and jungkook could feel it. could see it as though you were right in front of him. you were never one to handle a compliment, always going pink and shyly looking away and god, he loved it so much. loved complimenting you in hopes that you would react just like that, just to see you get all flustered.
the feeling in your stomach..it felt so strange. the same one that had haunted you for the past eight months, an unbearable warmth that filled you from your toes to your head, something you craved so desperately from him and him alone. to be noticed, looked at, admired by jungkook was one thing but to be loved by him? it was joy in itself.
you could feel it.
no one had ever loved you quite like he had done, as though every single thing you were capable of was worthy of applause. it terrified you.
“you can’t do this.” your voice came out so much smaller than either of you had expected, changing the entire feel of the call instantly.
as a result, his own tone softened, as though he was dealing with something porcelain.
“do what, baby?”
your heart physically ached.
“talk to me..like nothing happened.”
you felt sick to your stomach, hands gripping your phone and stomach as your eyes shut tight. you wished you hadn’t of said anything, not with the way the silence kissed the air in a way that felt anything but familiar - it hurt. painful in every single way.
for the first time since answering the phone, you could see jungkook properly. could hear him breathing sharply as though your words were both a reminder and an understanding that no matter what, things could never go back to what they once were.
the slight twitch in his cheek, the way his fingers would naturally tighten whenever he was overwhelmed with emotion like he didn’t know where to put it, where to place it in his overworking mind. he had always loved so deeply, your jungkook; just didn’t know where to put it, or how to show it.
when he finally spoke again, his voice was quieter. stripped bare for you, so you could feel him.
“i know what i did.” he admitted softly. “i know i fucked up, and that i failed you as a husband.”
your throat tightened.
outside, rainwater still lingered from earlier, a sickly humidity wrapped into every air particle around you. the scent of lingering cigarette smoke was heavy enough to ground you in that moment as you listened to jungkook speak words neither of you could truly handle hearing, despite how necessary they were. it just hurt so, so badly.
inside the bar, you could hear muffled laughter, people egging one another on for drinks as jazz boomed, your heart easing as you could hear yejin’s voice amongst the crowd, no doubt the life of the party there too.
“then why are you acting like this?” you pathetically asked, lip jutting out in a teary pout. he could almost hear it on you. “you’re talking to me like we’re still together.”
“you’re still mine, y/n.”
your breath hitched violently.
“jungkook-“
“no,” he remained calm, a stark difference between you and him. “you asked me a question, baby, so let me answer it properly.”
the nickname rolled off of his lips so naturally, instinctively, and you hated how easily your body curled closer, almost desperate to hear it whilst he stood in front of you. you had always been putty in his hands, so easily undone with a few pretty words but you’d held back for the past few months for the sake of your boundaries. hearing him so open, so honest - it was fucking you up all over again.
“i know we’re divorced,” he continued before you could interrupt him again. “i know..you’re not my wife anymore, and i know this is my fault. you left because of me and i’ll live with that for the rest of my life.”
his voice cracked by the end of his statement.
“but i won’t sit here and pretend like the last eight months have suddenly erased the past fifteen years of loving you.”
the words shattered you. your delicate, pathetic heart broke once more at his words at the confirmation of what you needed to hear so, so badly.
years of abandonment issues stemming from your parents and friends who had only ever toyed with you meant you had put your all into jungkook, who had only ever put every inch of himself back in - you were a partnership, a welcome duo that made sense to the both of you. watching him pull back, forget you, neglect and abandon your relationship no matter the reason was enough to trigger you in ways that no one could reason with.
it was an intimate form of violence that though was never intended, hurt more than anything he could have ever done to you.
he knew that. he was openly telling you he recognised his faults, his wrong doings - you knew that too. god, you knew him better than anyone alive, and you knew that by leaving him it was the only way for him to understand and see.
“you’re making this so much harder, jungkook.” you whispered out through a flood of tears, your mascara and eyeliner smudging immediately under the slaughter of liquid.
“i’m sorry. i’m so, so sorry baby but i need you to hear me, okay? just..i need you to know i’m going to fix this. properly.” he breathed out, desperate now. “i’ve been doing things right this time..gave you space, let you breathe, been working on myself and going to therapy. don’t sleep at the office anymore, did at the start cause i didn’t like coming home but i’m better now.”
therapy?
you knew he held so much trauma with his own parents, his own upbringing, too scared to ever even speak about it if it wasn’t with you but to hear he had actually taken the steps to go forwards with something that put him directly out of his comfort zone was insanity to you. especially when his one and only concern had only ever been your own comfort, even at his expense.
his honesty made you burst out into quiet sobs - a noise he swore was harsh enough to kill him. he breathed out, cooing at you lightly as he shook his head despite you unable to see him, so pained.
jungkook recognised your pain immediately.
“yeah,” he muttered. “turns out working yourself to death because you’re afraid of losing everything after you’ve had a shitty upbringing actually isn’t normal behaviour. who knew?”
despite your heartbroken state, you let out a sincere watery laugh.
the sound hit him like a drug.
he went completely silent after hearing it, replaying it in the forefront of his mind. a greedy, gluttonous side of him climbing out of his very throat as he held it close to his soul, cherishing it - he was a starved man finally being fed.
“there she is.” he breathed. “fuck..missed hearing your laugh.”
you hated how easily you were able to slip back into him.
“jungkook..”
“i mean it,” his tone deepened slightly - more certain, more intentional. “i’m not calling you tonight to confuse you, y/n. i’m not calling because i’m lonely..”
your fingers tightened around the phone once more. “then, why?”
“because i’m getting you back.”
there was no hesitation in his voice, no wariness nor anything other than sheer determination. he sounded firm and a part of that thrilled you, whilst the other half sat scared of what this meant - you couldn’t survive this again, losing him. what if you had changed? what if you weren’t who he thought you were anymore?
“hey, stop it.” he shook his head, eyebrows furrowing. “it’s just me, y/n. it’s just me and you, okay?”
“but what if we can’t do it?” you asked through a teary sob, scuffing your heels on the hard ground. “what if i’m different and what if it’s too hard? i can’t..i won’t survive it..”
silence once more.
“then, we do it slowly.” he whispered, assured, soothing you. no hesitation whatsoever. “i’m not asking you to trust me overnight, baby. i know i fucked that up already.”
your lip trembled, tears streaming so fast you could hardly keep up.
“but i’m here now.”
the words settled so deeply inside of you that it almost hurt. that was all you had wanted all along, was it not? a present husband, the same man that loved you without the frills of money and presents - you wanted jungkook. your jungkook.
you swallowed thickly, knowing it had taken so much of him to even say this to you, so confident as he knew you needed a rock at this moment despite also being emotionally devastated.
two whole minutes of silence stretched between you as you caught your breath, your tears still streaming but your sobs subsiding, allowing for sweet hiccups that he thought were the cutest thing he had ever heard. his mind swam, aching, knowing how needy you were after a cry. he wanted to bundle you up and hold you, kiss you until there were no more thoughts left in that pretty little head of yours, right until you were finally asleep and safe in his arms.
“are you still at work?” you asked softly, breaking the silence and pulling him out of his thoughts.
a small pause.
then, almost amused - “technically..”
“jungkook! it’s late..”
he laughed quietly under his breath, the sound warm enough to blanket you in it.
“finished hours ago, i’ve just been sat here.”
“doing what?”
another pause. slightly charged.
“looking at you.” he murmured.
heat rushed to your face immediately, wiping your under eyes. “what?”
“been stalking your instagram. yejin posted you like half an hour ago too, so..” his voice dropped lower, smoother. more intimate. “haven’t really thought about doing anything since.”
your thighs pushed together involuntarily at the confession, cheeks hinted even darker.
god.
“jungkook.” you chastised with a little sniffle.
“pink was a bad choice, baby.” he grunted slightly. “you know that colour drives me fucking insane on you.”
your eyes squeezed shut. there he was.
not the cold, mysterious ceo that had the world intrigued, nor the tall, hefty man that had most people cowering away as he walked past. no, this was your husband - flirty, affectionate and completely and utterly obsessed with you.
“you’re so ridiculous.” you shook your head through a hiccup, biting back the pathetic small smile that was about to form.
“yeah?” he hummed through a small laugh. “still answered the phone.”
the smile in his voice only had yours growing larger, a small laugh muffled by the back of your hand.
you could hear him moving around now, keys jingling lightly before the sound of a car door opening had your ears peaking up.
“wait,” your eyebrows raised. “are you leaving?”
“mhm.”
“where are you going?”
jungkook grinned. it was your turn to be curious.
“home.”
your smile dropped slightly. home.. that used to be a word that was synonymous with you. your chest ached all over again.
“couldn’t go back there without hearing your voice first.” he admitted quietly.
silence swallowed you whole. the vulnerability in his voice felt far more dangerous than any of the tears you had shed tonight, your fingers continuing to shake around the phone at the mere sound of it. before you could think of a response, he spoke again.
“there’s a gala next friday.”
your stomach tightened as you leaned your head against the wall, already understanding the direction of the conversation.
“jungkook..”
“come with me.”
no hesitation. no uncertainty.
firm, assured, confident. like there had never even been another concept, or thought in his brain - you were the first and only option.
“i don’t think that’s a good idea..”
“probably not.”
the honesty startled a laugh out of you - a real one. on the other side of the phone, jungkook sat in his car, eyes closed, breathing deeply at the sweet sound like he was memorising it. treasuring it so he could replay it over and over and over later when he laid in your once shared bed alone.
“fuck,” he breathed. “you have no idea how much i’ve missed that.”
your eyes burned once more.
“baby,” his tone gentled again, using the pet name you loved so much. “just one night. me and you.”
you wanted to scream, wanted to pull at your hair and jump all at the same time. of course you wanted to say yes, what more could you need? your ex husband so openly telling you he wanted to pursue you with every inch of his body, until he was nothing but yours to mould and shape.
“i’ll think about it.” you replied instead, nibbling away at your lip.
the grin in his voice was immediate.
“that’s my girl.”
—
you couldn’t breathe.
both physically and emotionally, you found difficulty in inhaling air as you looked at yourself in the mirror, yejin somewhere in the room finding accessories for you to wear all whilst you blinked rapidly.
the dress, although beautiful, felt too tight.
your hands shook on either side of you as she approached you, holding up a delicate diamond necklace you recognised as an anniversary gift jungkook had gotten you but never quite found the chance to wear. your eyes were unfocused as she clasped it onto your neck, watching the way it fell so softly against soft skin, as though it had been curated for you and you alone.
“you need to breathe, y/n.” she suddenly murmured behind you, resting her chin on your shoulder as you both stared at you in the mirror.
pale pink satin - not bright in anyway, but a sweet kiss of your favourite colour adorned your body in floor length, tight fitting dress. you were the embodiment of elegance as the fabric draped over your curves, all whilst cinching perfectly at your waist, allowing for a pretty silhouette. not only did you look the part for a charity gala, you had exceeded any expectation anyone would ever have for you thanks to your best friend’s styling.
“dress is tight.” you simply whispered back, hardly recognising yourself.
your makeup matched your dress. glowy and pink with soft blush dusted onto your cheeks, glossy lips puckered and sweet. your hair fell in waves and for the first time in a very long time, you felt utterly beautiful.
the problem, however, was in the circumstance itself.
you were about to see jungkook for the first time since you had officially walked away from your marriage and the thought had kept you up all week. you weren’t sure what you were thinking actually saying yes to his invitation, calling him to tell you would come only for him to audibly huff out of joy. he was like a child in a candy shop but you couldn’t help but wonder if he harboured the same anxiety.
it was heavy in your stomach as you stared at yourself. pink was your favourite colour, and he loved it on you. did you look pretty enough? all eyes would be on you both tonight, given the nature of your relationship and the almost celebrity like status that had been awarded to the two of you.
all in all, it was his face that had you nibbling your bottom lip in thought. there wasn’t a night where you left his name unsearched in your internet browser, desperate to see what he looked like in that current moment but seeing him in purpose was a whole different playing field.
you loved him in suits - a fitting joy that was awarded to you constantly given his occupation. the way his shoulders would fill out the material so nicely, the way his shirt would stretch over his chest and the way darker colours only brought out the darkness in his eyes - it was your personal kryptonite. you weren’t sure how you were supposed to think, behave even, once you caught got sight of him.
“hey, y/n, look at me.” yejin pulled you out of your thoughts, soft hands pulling at your jaw. “it’s just jungkook. you know him better than anyone, okay? you’re all good.”
you nodded, though you continued to blink at her rapidly. “s’just been so long and..i don’t know..i’m scared. is that weird?”
she offered a sad smile. “it’s been eight months of healing, babe. that love doesn’t just go away and from what you told me, this is a step in the right direction. just gotta let him in.”
before you could respond, the sound of the doorbell blared through the apartment, making you look up to where the door sat on the other side. if you thought your heart had been beating fast before, you were sure you were on the edge of passing out now as yejin mumbled a quick ‘that’ll be him’ beside you.
oh god. oh god. oh god.
the dress felt too tight around your ribs.
your hands smoothed down the satin again despite having done it what felt like a million times already, fingers tips trembling over expensive fabric as your breathing came out shallow. you hated this - hated the fear of it all when it was jungkook on the other side of the door. your jungkook.
eight months. eight whole months and your body still knew him better than your mind was ready to let on.
“y/n.” yejin practically cooed at you, assuring you with a hand on your back. “breathe.”
you nodded quickly, though it went in one ear and out the other.
the intercom buzzed again, impatient time.
ironically, it was this that had your shoulders slumping softly, your shortness of breath slowly soothing as you realised the familiarity of the situation. of course jungkook would buzz twice - it was a telltale sign of his own anxiety, something you could recognise from a mile away. knocking twice, calling your name twice, checking the front door before bed twice.
it was just jungkook.
“okay.” you whispered to yourself.
you turned, more determined now you knew he was in the same state as you, as your heels clicked on the floor of your much smaller apartment, the noise loud enough for him to hear from the outside. each step felt heavier the closer you got, but there sat an anticipation in you that had you almost desperate to see him.
your hand finally wrapped around the handle before you opened the door.
and there he was.
god.
for a moment, your brain completely malfunctioned.
jungkook stood in your hallway beneath the almost dingy apartment lighting, one hand wrapped around a large bouquet of flowers you recognised to be the ones he had been gifting you with continuously for the past few weeks, and every anniversary. white gardenias.
your eyes fell onto them immediately with a strangled gasp, all whilst taking him in, your heart beating out of your chest as you felt almost faint at the sight of him.
a black suit.
the material stretched perfectly across his too broad shoulders and narrow waist, expensive to the eye as you could tell it had been tailored to fit him exactly. the contrast between the white shirt underneath was utterly delicious, and memories of pulling open buttons under heated exchanges flooded your eyes.
his hair was styled almost messily which you immediately recognised as his hands having ran through them, no doubt due to his anxiety - you wanted to pull at his locks, wanted to feel them against your fingers.
it was his face, however, that hurt to look at.
he looked healthier than most of the pictures you had seen over the span of the past few months, with warm in his cheeks, a slight dazed look in his eyes. still tired, with purple underneath his eyes indicating his lack of sleep, still carrying traces of heartbreak you knew you had placed there.
god.
jungkook looked every bit of the man you were in love with.
and here he stood, staring at you like he had just seen heaven open up right in front of him.
neither of you could look away from one another, as his eyes dragged over you slowly, inch by inch. your hair, your neckline that dipped lower than he was used to seeing, your manicure, your beautiful face. jungkook couldn’t fathom that you had once belonged to him, the pain of the past eight months surfacing as it gripped him by the throat like a vice - he had lost you?
you watched his throat bob.
his eyes met yours, the first time in what felt like a lifetime, and neither of you really knew what to do. how was it that the man you had known most of your life, the one constant, felt like a stranger in that moment? it was like you were discovering him again, an opportunity to relearn him presented to you and you took it with both hands.
he let out a shaking breath, one that had your cheeks flushing as he extended his arm, presenting the large bouquet for you.
“you look beautiful.” he whispered, voice struggling almost as you continued to watch his adam’s apple almost entranced.
with a shy thank you, you held them close to your chest, breathing in the familiar scent that brought you so much comfort.
your chest had eased now you were finally looking at him, now that he was actually in your space - the worst was over. you almost felt ridiculous for being worried about seeing him when it was just jungkook. eight months couldn’t erase that familiarity.
the hallway suddenly felt too small. too warm, too intimate; you felt like you were being caved in by his mere presence and for a moment you wondered if you needed breath at all.
you simply stood there, clutching the flowers delicately to your chest as though they meant something so much more than what anyone else could assume all whilst jungkook looked at you like you were the first beautiful thing he had seen in months.
his eyes couldn’t leave your face.
it should have made you uncomfortable, the intensity of his stare, but your body reacted the way it had always done when you were near him. you were inching closer without even realising it, him doing the same until you were looking up, head angled and his downwards, head bent to admire you properly.
“hi.” you whispered again.
the size difference between you had never been more apparent until then, what with all of his strenuous visits to the gym these past few months. he had always towered over you, but it was different now - his already wide chest and broad shoulders engulfed you, his biceps on either side of him enough to have you wanting him in a way that certainly was not becoming of an ex wife.
it’s like he could read your thoughts, with the way he inched closer to you, until your bodies were openly brushing against each other faintly. material on material, fabric kissing fabric. you wished you could feel him on your skin.
the sound of your voice had lulled him gently as he dipped his head down lower so you could properly see him, despite your head back to look at him.
“hi, baby.”
your stomach flipped violently.
there it was again. baby. fuck.
as though the divorce papers were fickle, representing a momentary lapse of judgement instead of a ruling decision. like he still woke up beside you every morning and ruined your cheeks with kisses before falling in between your thighs.
the dazed look on your face didn’t go unnoticed.
before you could even respond, yejin appeared behind you with the biggest smile she could possibly muster.
“oh my god,” she squeaked dramatically. “you both look insane!”
jungkook blinked, momentarily pulled from the emotional spiral you were both taking part in as he straightened slightly, despite still being awfully close to you. your cheeks heated at the sound of her voice, jumping a little in shock, causing you to brush against him faintly.
“hi, yejin.”
“don’t hi yejin me.” she narrowed her eyes dangerously. “if she cries tonight, i’ll kill you.”
“yejin!” you flushed red.
jungkook, however, allowed for a soft smile, nodding once. “fair.”
the sheer sincerity of it made the room go quiet, your eyes meeting his once more. you knew though it was a passing comment, he truly meant it - he’d let her kill him if it meant you’d hurt less.
your chest tightened all over again.
yejin seemed to realise it too, her teasing expression softening at the both of you. idiots in love, both too cautious to know what the correct next step was - thank god she loved to meddle.
“okay! you’re both gonna be late so hurry up.” she hummed, turning you and looking over you for any last minute touch ups. “i’ll take these. i’ll show myself out.”
with a cheeky wink, she all but pushed you backwards towards jungkook where your back gently brushed against his front. she had taken the flowers, shoved your clutch in your hand and shut the door in your face, all after giving you a big grin.
he didn’t move from behind you, despite you turning to properly face him. the two of you stared at one another openly, eyebrows pulling together - you could see it happening in real time, the way his body curled at the mere feel of you. to be so close to you, touching you; it was out of a far away dream.
you felt it too - god, you could feel it in your veins. the horrifying wave of unashamed want that filtered through you so naturally, your body knew him. your body recognised your husband.
your man.
his restraint was palpable. you could see it in the way his fingers flexed on either side of him, almost twitching as muscle memory surfaced from deep inside of him. for years touching you had been second nature, with a hand on your waist, fingers lifting your chin, arms around your figure to hold you up for a kiss.
now he looked almost tortured as he realised he no longer knew what he was allowed to do.
the realisation alone softened you.
“we should go.” you whispered up at him gently, though your voice lacked any real conviction.
jungkook stared at you, offering a small nod almost obediently despite the stark hunger in his eyes.
“yeah.” he cleared his throat. “yeah, okay.”
he stepped back and first; the distance was felt immediately.
you suddenly missed the warmth that radiated off of him, fingers faintly tugging on his suit jacket so gently you weren’t even aware you were doing it. what the fuck was wrong with you? one touch and you were already spiralling into him again like the last eight months had never happened.
jungkook noticed. of course he did.
his chest visibly expanded from beneath the expensive material, eyes darkening so suddenly you felt heat up and down your spine. the way he looked at you had emotion swirling in your stomach, so hungry. so devoted.
you slowly released him, blinking rapidly as though you’d only just realised what you’d done.
“sorry.” you whispered instinctively.
jungkook’s eyebrows furrowed together in offence.
“don’t apologise for touching me.” his voice came out firmer than expected, low. far too intimate given the apartment hallway you were in.
the silence that followed felt thick enough to choke on, neither of you making an effort to move despite knowing you were bordering on being late. the tension was so unbearable now that you were both alone, freely staring at one another after so much time apart - no yejin to soften the edges. just fifteen years worth of tension, want and need all accumulated between you.
his eyes flickered downwards as he watched you sway slightly.
“your heels are insane.” he muttered softly.
you blinked. “hm?”
“you’re already wobbling.”
offended, your mouth gaped. “i am not wobbling!”
jungkook let out a small huff of amusement, loving how easy it was to rile you up. the sound completely disarmed you, seeing a glimpse of the same jungkook you had been with all of your life.
“you almost fell walking out of the door.” he teased, with a tilt to his head downwards at you.
“i did not!” you shook your head with a small swat to his chest. he only let out another laugh. “you literally grabbed onto me.”
“that..doesn’t count, okay?”
“mm.” amusement stretched over his face, as he led you to the staircase, cautious to be slow as he watched you continue to slightly wobble due to the uneven surface of the hallway. “sure.”
before you could even think of a rebuttal, you watched jungkook look down the multiple staircases with a slight frown before turning to you. he suddenly bent at the knees, your eyebrows furrowed in confusion for no longer than two seconds before one arm slid below your knees and the other around your back.
your gasp echoed.
“jungkook!”
he lifted you bridal style effortlessly, as though you weighed truly nothing to him.
your hands immediately flung to the back of his neck, arms wrapping around his shoulders in shock as your body felt more of him than it had done in what felt like eons. jungkook’s hands were so much bigger than yours, and you could feel him everywhere all at once, enough to have you dizzy with a sense of want.
“what are you doing?!” you whispered harshly, eyes blown wide as he sorted you on one single arm, checking his phone for the time with the other. it was beyond easy.
jungkook merely looked down at you calmly, entirely unbothered despite the way you could feel his pulse hammering below your fingertips.
“preventative measures. can’t have you slipping down the stairs.”
you stared at him in disbelief. “you can’t just pick me up!”
he scoffed a little, as though your words were going in one ear and out the other. your comfort came first, that much was ingrained in him and even you couldn’t stop him when it came to that.
he walked down the stairs as though it was the most natural thing in the world, one hand spread wide against your back, claiming whilst the other was hooked under your thighs, making sure you were as comfortable as possible against him. your dress was draped so beautifully over his arm that anyone who would have caught you in that moment would have remarked, ironically, how bridal you looked.
you couldn’t believe how safe he felt.
jungkook noticed the second you relaxed into him. properly.
“missed carrying you.” he admitted quietly as he descended another step.
your entire body burned. “jungkook.” you breathed weakly, though there was no real warning behind your tone.
“what?” he hummed innocently. “s’true.”
you remembered almost fondly - it was the one thing you probably missed more than anything else. he would carry you everywhere - from the bed to your bath, to the couch after you’d woken up, through grocery stores just to hear you squeak in embarrassment. one time he had held you for an hour straight, walking you home after a date just because your feet hurt.
and now, here you were again, tucked into his chest as though it was home. you supposed it was.
your heart ached so violently at the memory that looking up at him through your lashes had your brain whizzing too fast for you to keep up with.
“you’ve gotten so much bigger.” you whispered almost shyly before you could stop yourself, already tucked into him too comfortably.
big mistake.
his heart truly nearly fucking stopped. his head snapped down at you almost instantly, eyes darkening so visibly it had you avoiding any contact, instead focusing your gaze on his clothed pecs.
“yeah?” he asked slowly.
your cheeks were flushed dark, realising how that may have sounded.
“just..got broader.” you clarified through another whisper, wanting nothing more than to hide your face in his neck out of embarrassment.
“been working out a lot more.” he murmured down at you, ducking his head a little so that he could meet your eyes, a small smile forming.
you nibbled your lip with a little nod, fingers brushing against the ends of his hair.
jungkook knew you loved the size difference between you, but it truly didn’t compare to how fucked it made his mind go. it was the first thing he had noticed when you opened the door again - how despite your heels, you were still so much shorter. it drove him insane, especially now that he was bigger. feeling you curled into his chest like this, all safe and protected, it made him feel wanted. to have you notice it, address it even so shyly; fuck. it ruined him.
by the time he had reached the bottom floor, your cheeks were still heated, dreading the fact he would have to let you go when all you wanted was to curl into him even deeper. to think ten minutes ago you had so much anxiety when now, he was actively conversing with you all whilst carrying you, it felt euphoric.
the driver stood outside of the car, the same man who drove you both to events when you were still together. your eyes widened a little as you watched him open the back door for you both, all whilst you were still leisurely held in his arms.
your embarrassment returned instantly.
“put me down!” you hissed quietly.
jungkook looked at you, unaffected. “why?”
“because your driver is literally staring at us, jungkook!”
the poor man looked away with a growing smile. he had missed seeing his boss so carefree, knowing that he was only like this when the situation pertained to you.
he smirked faintly. “he’s driven us around for years, baby. pretty sure he’s seen us do a lot worse.”
your mouth fell open, swatting his chest. “jungkook!”
that finally earned you a proper smile, brief but enough to knock the very air out of your lungs, your too large eyes drinking it in almost desperately. he was so handsome it hurt, and it wasn’t until now you realised how much you had missed his smile.
carefully, he gently lowered you to the ground, making sure you were comfortable on your feet.
his hands lingered. neither of you moved.
your faces were suddenly so close once more as your hands had slid down from his neck, but remained in contact, fingers digging into his chest faintly to feel him. the city noise faded around you and into the background as he looked down at you with an emotion that could only be classed as longing.
“you good?” he asked softly.
you nodded too quickly. “mhm.”
liar.
his eyes dropped to your lips once more, eyeing the gloss almost hungrily - would it taste like the strawberry you always applied? sometimes, when he closed his eyes, he’d remember the flavour.
then, like he had to physically pull himself back, he stepped closer to the car and gestured to it slowly.
“after you.”
you slid into the backseat first, smoothening your dress as it rode up your body, all whilst your pulse hammered harshly.
the interior of the car was sleek, donned in a luxurious black leather whilst it remained dimly lit in the back, with enough enough space to stretch out your legs. the scent of jungkook’s cologne was addicting, and you immediately recognised it to be the one you had bought him on your last anniversary together, your heart fluttering at the thought.
once he climbed in beside you, you realised how intimate the space actually was.
jungkook sat close enough for his thigh to brush against yours, broad shoulders taking up far too much room whilst the driver shut the door quietly behind him.
neither of you acknowledged the contact. it somehow made it worse.
it wasn’t until the divider between the front and the back began slowly sliding upwards, offering a layer of privacy that your breath caught audibly.
jungkook noticed - of course he fucking noticed. he couldn’t stop staring at you, especially now that he had you trapped here, pushed against him like you belonged with a drive ahead of you. god, the things he wanted to do to you in this dress were sinful at best, but he had to practise restraint, no matter how much it took out of him.
he leaned back, one arm sliding over to the top of your seat, where although he wasn’t touching you, you slyly leaned in just to have more of his warmth. it felt so familiar, so nauseatingly natural that anything other would have felt wrong.
he watched as your thighs pressed together.
fuck.
“you nervous?” he asked in his low voice, jaw ticking.
your eyes slowly shifted, finally meeting his gaze. through a shaky laugh, one without humour, you nodded. “obviously.”
he softened at that, sharpness melting away to reveal the tenderness below.
“it’s just me, y/n.”
you felt so hyperaware of everything. the rain that tapped softly against the tinted windows, and the gentle purr of the car engine beneath you. the feel of jungkook’s thigh soothed you, whilst his heavy gaze unnerved you - a cocktail mix that felt so entirely him.
you could feel his eyes on you before you even looked up. once you did, your breath caught at the intensity of his stare - not polite. certainly not subtle. his gaze moved over you, up and down, like he couldn’t help himself, like he he’d been trying to hold back the second you opened up the door to your apartment.
“fuck.” he muttered under his breath.
your cheeks flushed pink, whispering his name.
you watched his eyes flush down your body, eyes stuck on your cleavage and the way the material clung to your hips. “look at you.”
you instinctively looked down, shy at the attention but you couldn’t help but crave it. you knew exactly how obsessive jungkook was when it came to you, knew how deeply infatuated he was with every inch of you but seeing it so closely after so long almost felt soothing. it was a reminder that though everything had changed, somethings stayed the same.
his hand moved before you could think too hard about it, cupping under your chin and tilting your face upwards.
“don’t hide from me.”
your stomach tightened, eyelids hooded.
this thumb brushed against your jaw once, so soft, so unbelieving that you were in his arms despite the fact you technically weren’t his anymore. not that he believed that.
“i can’t stop looking at you.” he admitted, tone rougher now. “been trying since you opened the door, but it’s impossible.”
your thighs pressed together immediately, his gaze dropping to the small action. the reaction was subtle, but there - he noticed everything when it came to you.
you suddenly felt so warm.
“you’re staring so hard.” you murmured nervously, fingers twisting together in your lap.
“because you’re driving me fucking crazy.”
the words came out so plainly your eyes widened.
jungkook exhaled sharply through his nose, head tipping backwards against his seat all whilst you watched with heavy breath. the far gone part of your mind wanted to track his neck, trace his adam’s apple with your fingers all so he could continue looking at you the way he had been.
he looked devastating like this - broad thighs spread in the backseat with your body pressed against him, his arm slung heavy on the head of your seat. the both of you were a mess for one another, sick in the head with infatuation.
you weren’t stupid. you knew your effect on him, perhaps not to the full extent, but enough to know that nearly a year’s distance between you was enough to drive a man like him insane. his hand dragged over his face with a quiet groan before adjusting himself slightly over his suit trousers.
your eyes flickered downwards before you could stop yourself.
jungkook smiled at the sound of your quiet giggle as you put a hand over your mouth to muffle it, looking up to meet his gaze after noticing he was half hard. all you had done was exist.
“yeah,” he murmured, the sound of your laugh blooming in his chest. “that’s your fault.”
you slapped his thigh gently, although you couldn’t hold back on the continuous giggles that were now leaving you as you felt lighter than you had in what felt like years. he too matched you, the intensity lightening up massively as he let out a quiet laugh despite himself.
“what’d you expect, hm?” he asked, voice soft. “i haven’t seen you in eight months, and now you’re sat next to me looking like this. wearing pink.”
his hand slowly slid over, brushing against your own, fingertips grazing your skin before he intertwined them, gently.
you let him.
the second you curled your hand into his yourself, his expression changed. up until now, it was him losing control, reigning himself in, biting himself down to make sure you were as comfortable as possible but fuck. you were the one touching him now, making sure he could see you intertwine your hands properly, squeezing his hand.
it felt like a confirmation that this was the beginning of a new chapter.
he wanted to scream, to yell on the top of his lungs at the thought of you openly showing him your willingness. his sweet, angel girl; he loved you more than words could describe and he wanted to spend the rest of his life showing you.
“missed this,” he admitted quietly, eyes on your much smaller hand holding his so intimately. “missed you touching me.”
your eyes burned suddenly.
jungkook noticed immediately with a frown, expression softening at the edges.
“hey, baby.” his thumb brushed yours. “don’t cry.”
“m’not crying.” you whispered, though your voice wobbled embarrassingly.
he held you close to him as you both remained quiet for the rest of the journey, though the silence felt welcomed after such a rush and mix of emotions. you had gone from anxiety, to confusion, to excitement, to warmth, to a painful reminder of what once was - it was enough to drive you insane. being around him hurt, but being near him was healing.
rain continued to pitter patter outside as your hands remained intertwined, his fingers gently brushing against yours as he sat there trying to fathom how this was real. you were letting him in, and he could see it, could see how much it was taking out of you and he’d be damned if he fucked it up again. to get a second chance was insanity alone, but to have it with you?
the car began slowing down.
through the tinted windows, you could see a flash of white, people trying to get a glimpse of the elusive ceo they were so obsessed with. you gulped as you watched other powerful business people walk in with their dates, models and celebrities lining up to have their picture taken.
you leaned into him almost immediately.
jungkook held onto you tightly, arm sliding over your waist and gently squeezing. “i’m here. stay by me.”
you nodded quickly, dazed. “okay.”
his eyes lingered on your face for a second too long before he muttered under his breath, almost like he couldn’t help himself. “you look so fucking pretty.”
your heart nearly stopped, meeting his gaze as your shoulders slumped, feeling calm through his sweet words.
the car door opened.
chaos.
jungkook stepped out first and the reaction was everything you had expected and somehow so much more. your eyes blinked as you watched the cameras explode violently, reporters shouting his name from all directions as they desperately tried to get a clear shot of him, knowing he could easily make front page news without having to try.
your heart stopped for a moment.
his back faced everyone else as he turned to you, taking a hold of your hands once more and gently helping you out of the car, smoothening your dress.
the second they saw you? everything multiplied by ten.
genuine screaming was heard from somewhere behind the barricades as you slowly stepped out, your own hand finding jungkook’s for a sense of comfort which he readily gave you, pulling you in a little closer than necessary. the noise was erupting, your vision blinded momentarily by the insane flashes, reports actually tripping over one another to take pictures of you in particular.
this wasn’t normal.
jeon jungkook never brought women anywhere. never entertained rumours, never dated publicly, never stood beside any other woman that hadn’t been you. even then, you had been painfully private, making sure to attend closed events with rare appearances, often opting to support in the shadows as opposed to centre stage as he was forced to.
but now? this was the loudest statement you could have possibly made and it slowly dawned on you both the nature of the decision.
you were telling the world you were ready to start again.
his entire demeanour had changed out here.
you were overwhelmed to say the least, but it was his arms around you that kept you grounded as you clung to him, your smaller frame tucked so delicately within his own that some found themselves putting their cameras down just so they could observe you both.
you were the epitome of love and neither of you even knew it.
ceo jungkook - all cold eyes, sharp jaw, that terrifying calmness. yet every few seconds he ducked his head down, whispering something in your ear that would have you smiling almost shyly back up at him, easing your mind away from the hundreds of people who wanted nothing more than to get a picture of you.
“jungkook over here!”
“is that your ex-wife?”
“are you two back together?!”
“y/n!”
you flinched slightly as the voices got louder the closer you walked down the carpet towards the venue, but it seemed jungkook’s presence only felt bigger.
“don’t look at them.” he whispered down into your ear, words tucked for you and you alone. “look at me.”
stupidly enough, you obeyed almost instantly. his eyes softened at the way you listened so sweetly.
“good girl.” he muttered absentmindedly before guiding you to the entrance and away from the prying eyes outside.
the words hit you far harder than they should have. good girl.
oh you were so fucked.
—
the venue was utterly breathtaking.
golden lighting spilled across towering ceilings whilst soft music played from a live orchestra at one side of the ballroom, so elegant you’re indeed whether you were even appropriately dressed. people stared at you openly, all whilst you and your flushed cheeks looked away, purposefully keeping your gaze vague and avoiding eye contact with most. glasses clinked together as powerful figures mingled amongst themselves, professional cameras still set up inside.
and yet, none of it compared to the way people reacted to jungkook.
conversations paused when he walked by, people straightening up. executives who had once terrified you now looked nervous approaching him and it reminded you exactly who he was outside of your relationship.
jeon jungkook was a terrifyingly cold, business man. he was untouchable and unfeeling, everything that made a powerful man powerful and then there was you. his one weakness.
his hand remained firm against the small of your back possessively, claiming you as his own in front of anyone who could see. you loved when he was like this, all brooding and dark as though anyone even had a chance to steal him from you - silly man. even now, with months of distance between you and a divorce, you were all his.
“breathe, baby.” he reminded with a quiet hum in your ear.
“i am breathing.” your cheeks warmed.
“barely.”
you shot him a look, though it was void of any real annoyance as he guided you further into the room. you couldn’t help but admire him openly, all whilst he scanned the room, not realising how deep you were falling into your own thoughts. he really had gotten so much bigger, with his chest so wide you couldn’t help but wonder what it would feel like under your hands. his shoulders too.
you had spent the entire drive trying not to stare at him. you had failed. miserably.
“drink?”
he pulled you out of your thoughts with a little gasp, realising you had been openly checking him out much to his pleasure. you found yourself nodding, nibbling away at your lip. “yes please.”
the words came out too fast, awarding you with a small laugh as he turned towards the bar.
your eyes followed him automatically.
that was another problem entirely. you see, no matter where jungkook stood, attention naturally followed. men greeted him immediately, keen to get into his good books whilst women openly stared, hoping to garner his fancy and yet he was completely and entirely uninterested. his gaze flickered back to you every few moments, as though he still couldn’t believe you were right there, just for him. just because he had asked you to come.
your chest squeezed painfully at the thought.
he returned only a few moments later with two champagne glasses, handing you yours to which you took with a nervous smile.
“thank you.”
your fingers brushed his purposefully. small, barely noticeable.
oh, but how jungkook had noticed. he noticed everything when it came to you and judging from the way his throat bobbed, taking a large sip of his drink, you knew that your poor ex husband was certainly not able to handle your charm.
the champagne helped much quicker than you were expecting it to.
after the first glass, the tension in your shoulders completely eased but it was the second that had you transforming. your overthinking thoughts ceased to exist, as the warmth in your blood brought out a shade of pink in your face that jungkook couldn’t look away from. standing close to him suddenly felt less terrifying and so much more thrilling.
a dangerous combination - especially when jungkook was looking at you with so much hunger.
a buzz had settled deep into your bloodstream, your brain slightly away with the fairies as you continued to sip, looking up at him. your other hand darted out, fingers trailing over his stomach openly, over to where the buttons of his suit sat. what was an absentminded action to you, tipsy, was enough to have jungkook almost shaking.
you were braver when you had alcohol in you, that much had been true your entire relationship, but even this felt quite insane. he watched as your fingers trailed up and down, sliding up to where his chest was only to drop lower and lower. it wasn’t until your fingertips were brushing the top of his suit trousers that he grabbed your hand.
you pouted at him, head tilted. “why?”
your whine had his shoulders rolling.
“because,” he said slowly, voice rough beneath the sound of the orchestra. “you’re getting handsy.”
your lips patted in faux innocence. “am not.”
jungkook stared at you half in disbelief and other half amusement, still holding your hand that he now pressed to his chest firmly. your fingers had nearly slipped below his waistband, a thought that had him nearly taking you home then and there but he knew it was because the alcohol was making you brave - his tipsy girl. his palm engulfed yours, feeling your fingers wriggle underneath to continue your plans with a slight whine but he was both firm and possessive, not letting you go.
you pressed your thighs together again.
this was the champagne.
he knew it, knew it to be a dangerous mix - the alcohol and your naturally clingy personality once you got comfortable, all combined with the eight months apart meant you were now simply doing whatever your heart wanted with little care to your mind.
your cheeks warmed as you watched him stare down at you, gaze heavier than anything all evening. it seemed the longer you were both in each other’s presence, despite how long you’d spent apart, the more bold you were getting - but could you be blamed? he might have been your ex husband but he still belonged to you, and you knew you were still entirely his, a fucked up fact that meant you were both drawn to each other in ways that meant you could never move on.
multiple months of healing all gone to shit in a single night, with a few drinks. who were you both kidding - moving on wasn’t an option. even you could see that now.
your fingers flexed under his hold, people secretly watching you both interact with bated breath. they couldn’t believe this was the same jungkook they were afraid of, made to mush at the hands of the pretty woman in front of him. he was but a man afterall.
rather than pulling away, your fingers simply curled around the fabric of his suit jacket, fingers touching his shirt purposefully to elicit another reaction out of him. he had reduced you to putty in the drive over and perhaps it was the alcohol in your system, but you wanted him to feel the same.
jungkook was quiet. too quiet.
jaw slightly slack as he took you in, you touching him like his body belonged to you and you alone. he relished in the fact you knew it just as well as he did.
he had missed this so much. just the feel of you, no matter how innocent you pretended to be, skin on skin. it felt like a promise.
and now, you were standing here, head tilted to stare up at him properly whilst looking through pretty lashes that batted at him subconsciously.
it was driving him insane.
“you’re staring again.” you hummed at him. his eyebrows narrowed. “because you keep touching me.”
you tried to bite down the smile that began to form on your lips as your fingers continued to flex, soon finding his heartbeat to confirm your suspicious. oh, he was a mess underneath your hand.
“you don’t seem to mind.”
his jaw flexed. you heard him curse under his breath, calling you a fucking minx which only had you giggling just as quietly. it was a powerful thing to have a man as influential as jungkook so weak in the knees for you, and you couldn’t deny the affect it was having on your mind. he snaked a heavy arm around your waist, pulling you flush against him in a way that was absolutely not becoming of the environment you were in.
“keep this shit up and i’ll take you home.” he promised quietly, leaning down to whisper into your ear.
unfortunately for him, you had no intention of stopping. especially when you had just begun.
“promise?” you whispered back, eyes wide with a faux innocence you knew he wanted to ruin.
his jaw clenched again, blood half boiling at how cheeky you were being and cock hardening by how badly he wanted to ruin you. had this been any other circumstance, you’d already be in the bathroom with your dress to your chest, being pounded into by the only man who knew exactly how to ruin you until you were well bred.
but alas - this night was about proving himself to you, and no matter how hard you made him, he knew he had to do this right.
and so, instead, he pinched you at your waist slightly, pulling an airless squeak out of you before he brushed his lips against your ear.
“behave.”
the word should have been warning enough, but instead, warmth fluttered through you, rushing through your stomach so violently you pressed against him further. jungkook nearly hissed, watching how reactive you were for him, with your hooded eyes and slack jaw.
fuck.
his hands were all over you, with little care to who was watching and you knew tomorrow you’d be mortified when you remembered how brazen you had both been, but it was hard not to feel addicted when you were both feeling the same way. you giggled lightly, hiding your face in his chest momentarily before meeting his gaze.
“you’re very confident for someone i divorced.” you playfully hummed.
at that, he couldn’t help the smile that formed on his face. “didn’t stop you from getting your pretty hands all over me.”
the alcohol was well into your system as you found yourself giggling once more, fully hiding yourself in his chest to which he wrapped his arms around you properly, the two of you whispering and laughing together as though it was the most natural thing in the world. jungkook’s colleagues, rivals and admirers all watched you both in genuine curiosity at the way you were so well suited. two people, quietly infatuated with one another - it was toothache inducing.
the conversation between you both remained playful, with his thumb tracing your bottom lip at one point muttering something about how badly he wanted to know how your lip gloss tasted. an hour in and you were both practically trying to one up each other with how far you could take it, leaving you both laughing whilst trying to stay quiet.
this is what you had missed. joy. comfort. being around him in a way that didn’t feel like you were fighting to prove something. it had been so long since you’d felt this carefree that you realised pretty quickly that you couldn’t let him ago again. it was a horrible thought at first, realising that the past few months may have been for naught but perhaps absence did make the heart fonder.
soon enough, you had been there close enough two hours and jungkook had done the rounds once you settled in, less tipsy but still buzzed. you met his new business partners, clients you hadn’t seen in a while, a mixture of familiar faces and people you had only ever heard about. neither of you commented on the fact he introduced you intimately, with a heavy arm around your waist.
it genuinely felt like no time had past with the way you both felt so comfortable, the dynamics between you natural considering he had been the one constant in your life for the past fifteen years. you sipped on your glass of water as you listened to his conversation half mindedly, watching him discuss a new company contract with one of his shareholders.
it wasn’t until you heard a voice echo throughout the ballroom announcing the beginning of the charity auction that the conversation came to an end. jungkook immediately took a hold of your hand, planting a cheeky kiss to your knuckles with a slight smirk, before leading you towards the front of the room where the different things on auction sat to be admired over.
“c’mon.”
you followed him easily, hands intertwined whilst you walked side by side, champagne now a dull buzz in your body. people moved around you respectfully, all whilst their eyes lingered on you much longer than needed. could you blame them? you were the infamous woman that had managed to lock down the one man that seemed disinterested in everything, so much so that you had him laughing and flushing pink every time you so much as looked at him. the divorced couple that looked anything but divorced.
oh, they were staring indeed, with hushed whispers and even quieter questions.
your attention drifted lazily over the displayed pieces, politely but nothing quite caught your interest, your eyebrows pulling up at some of the art pieces named. it wasn’t until you reached the very end that you found yourself stopped in your tracks.
jungkook noticed, he too coming to a stop to glance over at you only for his gaze to follow yours. he immediately understood.
beneath warm lighting sat a painting, inconspicuous to most considering it was much smaller than the grand pieces to the left, but it had your eyelashes fluttering
white gardenias.
your breath left you quietly.
it wasn’t just flowers - it was an oil painting, textured with strokes of green, ivory and creams whilst petals cascaded over one another so delicately your heart ached. the background dat moodier, darker compared to the softness of the flower leaving you in a state of utter awe for a few moments, all whilst holding the hand of your ex-husband who watched you with bated breath.
it was beautiful.
you stepped closer unconsciously, hardly aware of yourself.
jungkook didn’t think he’d ever seen you look at something with this much wonder, in all of the years he had known you. it did something to him, to watch you genuinely in awe at something he could so easily give you - it made him realise he needed provide it for you just to see that look again and again and again and again and again.
he felt this throat tighten, a harsh lump forming the longer he watched you admire it. the way your glossy lips parted, eyes widened and fingers tracing the air in front of it - donned in the same diamond necklace he had gotten you years prior. the same necklace he’d bought you after you murmured something about diamonds resembling stars late one night as you curled into him in your shared bed.
and here you were, wearing it, all whilst your hand curled inside his as though you had never been more at peace. that did something to him. something he couldn’t quite describe.
your fingers moved to brush over the small description plaque underneath, reading the inspiration for the piece with a small, choked huff - devotion. enduring, eternal love through trial and tribulation through each season of life.
your own throat tightened then. of course.
“gardenias are difficult flowers..they die so easily if you don’t take care of them.” you found yourself whispering; straightening your back and avoiding his gaze to bite back any tears that wanted to appear.
his chest tightened violently.
all he could think about was the little apartment you had both shared when you were younger, when he barely had any money to get you by each month. the one with the poor lighting and the janky sink - you used to sit by the window each morning whilst he got ready for work, whispering sweet things down at them because you believed it would help them grow.
he remembered every single detail.
“you kept yours alive for months.” he whispered back, the hand that was clasped in yours now intertwining your fingers, as though he could project his memories back to you.
you blinked back at him, eyes glassy, surprised slightly. you hadn’t expected him to remember something so small and insignificant.
how could jungkook could ever forget a single thing about you?
a small smile pulled at your lips. “i used to get upset whenever they’d lose petals.”
“you cried once.” he corrected.
you rolled your eyes. “shut up!”
he only shrugged, lips twitching. “had to console you all night.”
“i thought i killed it!”
his quiet laugh nearly knocked the air from your lungs, all whilst he pulled you back into him, breathing in the scent from your hair before taking you to your shared table, where the auction was about to begin. your fingers remained curled around his own, all whilst he helped you sit down, fixing your dress for you.
he physically couldn’t pull away from you, couldn’t stop touching you even as you began conversing to the woman beside you, who jungkook recognised as one of his shareholders. his thigh was pressed against yours, all whilst his hand sat heavy in your lap, both of your hands playing with his fingers absentmindedly.
the different items came on stage as you watched people bid, raising their panels whilst some shouted out their numbers for more exclusive pieces. you couldn’t help your giggles, leaning over to whisper in jungkook’s ear whenever you’d see more excited people, all for him to lean into you with an equal smile. the two of you were being silly, and it felt fun for once.
by the time the gardenia painting finally appeared, your posture straightened as you tapped on his hand with a wiggle of your eyebrows. jungkook watched you with a lazy grin, eyes flicking over your face.
cute.
the bidding started much lower than you expected, causing you to frown. “that’s it?”
he nearly laughed, seeing your passion for your flowers. “art’s subjective, baby.”
“yeah, well everyone is wrong..so.”
fuck. he loved you so much.
you watched as someone raised their paddle, and then another, and another. a bidding war began as your head bounced between people, watching in utter curiosity though a part of you wondered what it would be like to bid yourself. ironically for you, you were completely unaware of the man beside you staring at your profile like he wanted to devote the rest of his life to you.
“two million.”
your eyebrows raised.
“two and a half!” someone else shouted, causing you to play with his fingers a little faster almost out of excitement.
“hope someone who actually appreciates it gets it.” you leaned over to whisper into his ear, lips brushing against his cheek in the process.
his jaw ticked.
game on.
just as someone shouted out, claiming three million, jungkook ran a hand through his hair before raising his panel, dark eyes trained on the auctioneer.
“five million.”
your head snapped sideways so fast you nearly gave yourself whiplash, all whilst jungkook sat completely calm, hand raised lazily as though this was easy. like he hadn’t just dropped five million as though it was nothing.
“jungkook!” you whispered, eyes wide. he merely hummed back at you, hand still intertwined with yours. “hm?”
“what are you doing?!”
“getting you your painting.”
you stared at him in disbelief.
across the room, multiple people were openly whispering now, glancing between you because everyone could recognise what was exactly happening. this wasn’t ego - this was love.
obsessive, and terrifying love.
another bidder raised their paddle almost nervously, calling out a measly “five and a half” after a moment of hesitation.
“seven million.”
an audible murmur fluttered through the room just as you grabbed onto his arm with a large gasp, eyes widening as though he was batshit insane. “jungkook, stop!”
he finally looked at you, small smile playing on his lips at the sight of you so shocked. it was so cute the way you were practically toppling over your seat, a reminder that despite being with him, you had never really dabbled in his wealth whatsoever despite it all belonging to you.
a large shout of ‘sold’ was heard by all, but you couldn’t bring yourself to look away from him. his eyes admired you, from your lips to your eyes, your shaking hands that were both clinging to his thigh, your cleavage that had dipped even further than earlier. fuck. you were the epitome of everything he had ever wanted.
“you wanted it.” he whispered to you, as though that was all he needed, as though it was enough of a reason to spend seven million in one night with a flick of his wrist.
your eyes near enough watered at his words, knowing that nothing had ever described jungkook better.
—
things between you and jungkook had settled into something dangerous.
not enough to call yourselves fixed, or enough to place a label onto whatever fragile thing had formed between you, but enough that your days seemed lighter. having him back in your life meant you were happy again, and actually excited - finally feeling whole in ways that no one else quite understood.
he called more often now.
what started off as phone calls sometimes briefly between meetings, something about using your voice to destress before important gatherings. they quickly turned to late night facetimes where both of you laid in bed, half naked, chatting until either of you would fall asleep. some nights they turned into something darker, dirtier, with a slip of your night dress to show him more all whilst he’d grunt and hiss at the sight, whispering all of the things he wanted to do to you.
it was beginning to feel domestic, familiar even. so terrifyingly easy.
you realised pretty quickly that somewhere along the way, between late night conversations and soft laughs exchanged, you had began falling deeply in love again.
hard.
he had been away on business ever since the gala a few weeks ago, with him currently stationed in hong kong over some important stakeholder meetings. you knew he was incredibly stressed over it, given the frequency of his calls - always at odd times during the day and night, sometimes with the intention of just looking at your face as though it was the only motivator he needed.
the time difference was more irritating than you had expected, and yet he still managed to find a way to accommodate to your schedule as opposed to his.
your favourite so far had been a simple picture of the skyline view from his hotel, taken at three am with a caption of ‘wish you were here.’
you hated how much those four words affected you.
pathetic, really. how even now, you’d kick your feet in excitement over any message sent from your ex husband.
it had become routine now, to expect messages from him with each waking moment, calls when the workload was heavier. perhaps that was exactly why the silence that afternoon felt so particularly loud.
you were curled into your couch, opting to work from home as you were in his jumper and a pair of flimsy shorts. you hummed quietly as you balanced your laptop on your thighs, all whilst a random entertainment news channel played in the back to offer some noise in your otherwise quiet apartment.
your ears perked up once you heard jungkook’s name somewhere in the background.
your attention barely lifted at first, no doubt another gossip sesh on how attractive he was which often made you giggle, but this felt different.
“ceo jeon jungkook spotted in hong kong alongside mystery woman-“
your stomach dropped.
the laptop slipped from your thighs and onto the couch cushion, all whilst your head snapped towards the television, reaching for the remote to turn it up. the image splashed across the screen, all whilst you sat there, smaller than anything, watching.
jungkook.
beside him, an undeniably beautiful woman.
she was tall, elegant, dressed sharply in a suit practically created for her whilst cameras flashed at them harshly, exiting a building together. the headline underneath made your chest cave in further.
‘global heartthrob ceo finally moving on after the divorce?’
you stared. and stared, and stared, and stared, and stared, and stared until your knees had slowly slid to the ground, your back touching the couch whilst the entertainment show droned on and on about the details of your relationship with jungkook, about how smitten you had both seen at the gala, how they were the first to break this exclusive news.
your brain knew better. you knew jungkook like the back of your hand and logically, you fucking knew better. jungkook was so many things, but he had always placed you and your emotions first, your priorities, your necessities, your life - your wants and needs transcended everything else. you had never asked for it to be this way, it was just the way he was.
even during your separation, he had never looked at a woman twice. you knew that.
but logic had never been able to defeat insecurity.
all you could think, all you could see, based off of a single image was how she fit beside him. how effortless it looked, how beautiful she was, how successful. so poised and polished - she was everything a woman who stood beside jungkook ought to have been and it was killing you in real time.
the worst thing of all was the realisation that he didn’t belong to you.
all of this emotion, this horrible feeling inside your chest and soul - you were the one to divorce him. you had been the one that demanded it end back then, no matter how much he had begged you to see reason, believing that it was the correct step forward for the both of you. he had every right to move onto someone else, had every right to actually step forward towards something new.
and yet the thought of him belonging to someone else felt the closest to grief you had ever felt in your life.
your phone rang violently loud beside you, droning out the words of the presenter and making you jump slightly.
jungkook.
your eyes burned instantly.
the phone continued to ring and ring across the sofa cushion as you stared at his contact picture, a photo taken on your anniversary a few years ago that you could never bring yourself to change. your chest rose unevenly as another harsh wave of emotion hit you.
you couldn’t do this.
not after you had spent the past few months trying not to think about him, only for him to come back into your life.
the call rang out.
then another came. and another. and another.
your phone was blowing up with a mixture of calls and messages, each vibration making your heart ache so much worse as the topic changed on the tv, talking about some other celebrity gossip all whilst you felt your entire life collapse before your very eyes.
with shaking hands and teary orbs, you turned your phone off.
you burst into tears.
the rest of the day was spent being utterly miserable. you had never felt so pathetic in all of your life, with pain running up and down your veins in a way that genuinely left you almost debilitated. the last time you were this heartbroken, you were a fresh divorcee.
the curtains remained shut despite the afternoon sun outside, your apartment dim besides the soft flicker of the television that continued playing mindlessly in the background. at some point, you had dragged yourself towards your bed with tears still streaming down your face, his oversized jumper now heavy on your frame.
you hated this version of yourself.
hated how deeply this had affected you despite knowing better. you knew him better than this, had enough trust in him and yet you couldn’t barter with what was directly in front of you - months after rebuilding a sense of confidence all for it to shatter over one measly, gossip channel.
you closed your eyes, images of the beautiful woman stood beside him flooding your mind causing you to open them up again with a quiet whimper. so composed and effortless. untouched by the devastation eating you alive.
by morning, your chest was in genuine pain.
you looked awful too.
your eyes were swollen, red with the continuous tears all night whilst your skin felt sunken and dull, the early morning sun hitting your skin from glimpses through your blinds. you forced yourself out of your bed and into your shower, trying to rid the plaguing thoughts out of your body. you failed, spending the majority of it quietly crying.
by the time you were in the living room again, your nose was just as pink as your eyes, hands shaky and body adorned in an old t-shirt you had secretly stolen from his wardrobe back when you were packing to leave. you curled weakly into the couch, blanket curled onto your legs as you begged your body to rid the horrible stomach ache that had now found home inside you.
your phone remained switched off, somewhere under the blanket, still left there from yesterday. you reached for the remote.
you just wanted mindless noise.
instead, the television flickered to life and you found your breath catching harshly for the umpteenth time within 24 hours.
breaking news banners on every channel you came across.
jeon jungkook.
a whimper pulled up out of your throat at the sight of his images everywhere, your fingers tightening around the blanket before you turned the volume up.
“the ceo has officially filed legal proceedings against multiple media outlets this morning following yesterday’s false dating allegations-“
your heartbeat began thundering. you sat up immediately.
another clip appeared instantly, reporters practically tripping over one another in front of jungkook’s main company building, cameras flashing in hopes of getting a picture of anyone who could answer for anything.
“the statement released by jeon jungkook’s legal team less than half an hour ago reads as follows-“
the screen shifted, and suddenly, there it was. cold white text against a black background that had your breathing stopping completely.
“the allegations regarding ceo jeon jungkook are entirely false. the individual photographed was present for a scheduled business meeting attended by multiple executives and investors. legal action will be taken against all parties responsible for the deliberate spread of false information and invasion of privacy.”
your throat tightened harshly.
your eyebrows furrowed as you watched the presenter stop, looking at the camera momentarily, before her voice completely softened.
“as for the final portion of the statement, many online are expressing surprise regarding the unusually personal nature of his response as he personally commented-“
more text appeared.
you scanned it once. twice.
over and over and over until a harsh sob was ripped from your lips.
“i have never entertained nor pursued any romantic involvement with anyone.
there has only ever been one woman.”
a broken sound tore from your throat as your hand flew to your mouth, fresh tears spilling from eyes so fast that you couldn’t see the tv. your heart felt like it had been picked up from the ground, cradled and cherished after being pierced over and over all night, attacked without any reprise.
you couldn’t believe what you were reading.
jungkook, your jungkook? so private and reserved, not willing to give one inch of himself to anyone other than you and yet here he was, making himself as clear as possible. he was telling everyone with ears that you were his but more importantly, he belonged to you and you alone.
he despised media attention, it truly was the one thing he hated more than anything and the both of you would often laugh at rumours and random things stated in the tabloids because they were all bullshit.
and yet he has made a statement publicly.
for you.
your chest cracked at the thought as you covered your face with both hands, sobbing harder and harder.
before you could wallow further, a loud banging erupted from the front door.
the sound tore so violently through the apartment, you jumped - startled on the couch whilst your heart leapt to your throat. the slight fear had your tears stopping immediately, allowing for enough of a shock to regulate your mind for a few moments.
another knock came before you could even process it. louder, and louder, and louder.
“baby!”
your breath hitched painfully.
jungkook?
his voice sounded wrecked. not the calm, controlled man the world knew, nor the eerie ceo who often stood emotionless in front of the cameras whilst deals worth billions sat heavy on his shoulders. this was your jungkook - the one who loved you much too hard, half unravelled whenever the conversation pertained to you.
“open the door.” he shouted again, along another collective banging. his voice cracked slightly. “please..”
you stared into space for just a moment, your mind unable to comprehend what was happening before your legs carried you to the door, through the hallway. you slipped on your blanket slightly, already shaking body weaker than usual given the past twenty four hours, all whilst hot, heavy tears burned in your eyes once more.
another knock.
“baby, c’mon..”
the second your shaking hands unlocked the door, it swung open hard enough to hit the wall behind it, as though jungkook couldn’t believe you had actually heard him.
he looked utterly destroyed.
he stood, still in a suit that now sat disheveled on his frame, black tie loosened around his throat, white shirt wrinkled as though he had been in it for hours. his usually pushed back hair was messy, pulled at and tugged through large hands any time he had realised the depths of emotion you were no doubt feeling looking at the news - if the shoe was on the other foot, and jungkook had seen news of you and another man; he would’ve happily burnt the world to a crisp.
the second he saw you, his entire face fell apart, anger long dissipating.
“fuck.” he whispered, heaving out a breath.
his oversized shirt sat on your body, engulfing your smaller frame, swallowing you whole in a way that had his breath taken away. it was your eyes that broke him, however, as they looked so swollen, no doubt from crying so hard, your cheeks still damp and lips still quivering enough that he watched you bite down on them.
you watched his throat bob harshly, watched his eyes flicker over yourself frantically like he was trying to assess how badly you had been hurting without him here to comfort you. the thought terrified him.
that was all it took for a sob to rip out of your chest so painfully your knees almost buckled. your hands flew up to your face.
immediately, his arms shot out, cradling you almost harshly to him with one large arm completely covering you whilst his large hand pressed against the back of your head, holding you close to him as though this was the only remedy for a situation like this. his sweet girl. his sweet, sweet girl.
“i called you for nineteen fucking hours.” he said, eyes darting down at you desperately.
you couldn’t stop crying. “i know.”
“your phone was off.” his voice broke slightly, as though the situation had hurt him beyond words. “that scared me, y/n.” he admitted, chest heaving a little.
your crying only worsened immediately because of course it scared him - jeon jungkook, a man who’s entire identity was you and you alone. the prospect of losing you for the second time would surely be enough to kill him, and yet answering his calls felt like the last thing you could bring yourself to do.
“i tried not to think like that,” you choked out through hiccups. “i know you wouldn’t, logically i know but just kept seeing the pictures of you beside her and..”
your chest was heaving.
“stop talking about her.”
the words came out sharp, almost harsh.
his hand slipped to cup your face, holding your jaw in place whilst his arm slipped down, cupping your body to him so you could rest, his own strength supporting you up. his eyes were wild.
“don’t,” he repeated quieter, chest rising and falling. “don’t..stand here and..fuck, don’t compare yourself to someone else for even a second over some shitty tabloid.”
you couldn’t stop crying. it was as though that was all you could do.
“jungkook..”
“no.” he cut in immediately, voice cracking at the edges. “you don’t get it.”
he stood before you, a cocktail mix of utter despair and devotion, all whilst anger and fear simmered on the surface, every emotion open on his face to the point he almost felt unrecognisable. you knew he loved you, could see it painted on his features for the world to see but you weren’t sure when his feelings for you had become his very destruction. it scared you.
his hand shook around your face.
“you think i flew half a day because of a fucking dating rumour?” his eyes glazed over. “i don’t give a fuck about the tabloids, baby, you know that. i was scared because i know what this would do to you. i know your brain.”
your breath hitched.
“i know you.” he repeated, hands continuing to shake against you. “know how your mind gets. i know you’d sit here and cry over this shit when you know i would never touch another woman.”
another harsh sob clawed up your throat, and jungkook heaved at the sight as though it was the worst sound he had ever heard.
“look at me.” he pleaded suddenly.
his hands dropping from your body as he suddenly dropped to his knees - a man of his stature rendered completely broken by the woman he loved. the amount of people who looked up to him, feared him; the amount of people he dictated on a daily basis and yet here he was, on his knees for you. only you.
“there has never been anyone else.” his voice cracked completely. “not before you, not after you. not after this, no matter what happens, you hear me? it’s you, and it’s always going to be just you.”
your own knees were begging to give out, as you leaned against him, only for him to rest his face against your stomach, breathing you in like a man desperate for your understanding. he wanted you to see, needed you to comprehend the situation at hand. there was no him without you, the concept didn’t exist.
“you’re the only woman i’ve ever loved and there is nothing after you, y/n, because you’re my wife. divorce or not, i don’t give a fuck, i belong to you forever whether you want me or not and i won’t..i can’t have you thinking otherwise.”
your entire body gave in at the admission as you collapsed into him with another heart breaking sob, jungkook holding you like a man terrified he had said too much and truly not enough. for the first time since the divorce, neither of you tried to pretend this wasn’t exactly what it was.
—
the rest of the evening softened after that.
somewhere between the tears and the endless kisses planted to your cheeks, nose, head, hands and stomach came an ease to the panic that had long settled into your bones for the past few months. he refused to let you go, grunting almost childishly whenever you’d move out of his arms to do anything until you found yourself snuggled back into his arms, as though the thought of distance after such a clear cut declaration of love physically pained him.
he looked exhausted now that the adrenaline of the situation had worn off, his under eyes sunken from the exhaustion that had now settled deep into his body. to think he had flown all the way across the world simply because of the thought of you crying all alone over a situation that was so completely false upset him - it made you want to sob all over again.
how could you have ever let him go? how could you proceed forward without him, without him so deeply intertwined in your life once more?
eventually you found an old pair of black shorts mixed in with your clothes from when you had packed your things all those months ago. jungkook had stared at them for a few moments after his shower, towel low on his hips as water droplets slipped down his chest. it had his heart pounding faster than anything yet.
“you kept these?” he murmured down at you, watching the way your eyes flickered up from his physique, small gasp leaving your lips at being caught. “oh! um..must’ve slipped them in by accident.”
he didn’t comment on the fact you were wearing his t-shirt either, despite it hardening his cock.
still, he pulled them on as you settled into bed, your hair still scented from your earlier shower too. you, in his too big top, whilst he grabbed you immediately, shirtless and hands still desperate to hold you in a way he had held back on for so long.
you hummed as your body pressed against his, his figure snaking around your body as a heavy arm curled under your ass as a means to prop you up higher in his arms, causing you to giggle into his neck. your arms wrapped around him too, humming a little under your breath as he breathed in your scent openly.
you both laid there in silence for a long while, breathing. healing.
the room was dark now, with the city lights from afar shining through the slips of your blinds, illuminating slivers of his bare chest beside where your hands sat. you could feel his heartbeat, the way it calmed your already heightened senses as though your body recognised it was finally home.
“missed this.” you whispered into his ear, only snuggling closer to him.
jungkook’s grip, once on your waist, slid down to your ass once more. this time, his palm sat on your ass cheek, fingers digging into your skin whilst breathing you in.
“don’t say shit like that to me when i’m hard.” he grunted, a small smile forming across your lips. you hadn’t even done anything, not that you needed to to get jungkook bothered.
when you pulled him from your neck, his eyes were already glazed over, both of you taking a second to simply stare at one another in the exact way you had wanted for so long. his mouth parted, as his hooded eyes took you in, holding you closer, tighter.
within seconds, his lips touched yours.
slowly, at first, as though he was trying to relearn you after years of you being his. he savoured every moment of your lips against his, especially once you started to kiss him back, both of you uncertain in the beginning but once your hands began to find home in his hair, it was then that jungkook’s touch began to grow in confidence.
he kissed like a man starved, one hand buried in your hair too whilst the other continued to grip your ass possessively, as though physically feeling you was enough to have his mind go into overdrive. every small sound you made went straight to his cock as he swallowed your little sighs and whimpers, only pushing him to kiss you deeper and deeper and deeper.
he was growing desperate, pushing you down against the bed, half hovering over you as he rested on one arm, hand cupping at your thighs, your stomach, your knee. anything he could get his hands on all whilst his tongue explored your mouth as though he had every right.
perhaps he did because despite everything, the divorce and distance, the heartbreak - he still reacted to you like you were the only thing capable of fucking him up.
his lips eventually drifted from your mouth, pressing against your chin, your jaw and finally your neck. oh, this sweet, pretty little neck, he had dreams of marking it up and down every other night and the fact he had you in his arms now, in a bed far too small for the things he so desperately wanted to do to you was everything and more.
jungkook moved, properly hovering over you now just as you moaned into his mouth, legs wrapping around his waist, pushing your top down your thighs and revealing your lace panties you had conveniently put on. just in case, of course.
he pulled away, a string of saliva connecting both of your mouths as you watched it break apart the further he pulled his head back. just staring at you hurt, with the way your cheeks had flushed and your hair was spread all across the pillow, and your thighs. fuck. the sight of what was between them had him openly groaning down at you.
“need you to tell me to stop baby, or i won’t be able to hold back.” he hissed down at you, feeling your legs tighten around him before he could finish his sentence.
your hands moved to the waistband of his shorts, eyes never leaving his as you tugged on it just slightly. jungkook, who’s two hands were on either side of your head, blinked down at you half in awe and other agony, the prospect of you teasing him in a moment like this his literal worst nightmare. you always knew how to make him impatient, said it was the best version of him.
he watched with bated breath as you grabbed one of his arms until his hand was in your own, slowly pushing it under your top to rest on your stomach. it felt heavy on your frame, large palm heating your already hot skin before you pulled him down, other arm wrapping around his neck.
“wanna feel you here, kookie.” you whispered into his ear.
jungkook nearly took you then and there.
his jaw flexed, a heavy leaving his lips as he chased your lips, planting another kiss. “yeah? want kookie deep inside?”
“mhm.” you hummed against him, placing your hand over his on your stomach.
“but haven’t taken me for so long, baby. might be too much.”
you closed your eyes at that - the way he cooed down at you despite telling you how easily he could ruin you, break you. it all felt like too much and yet the empty ache inside of you reminded you it wasn’t enough, causing you to merely nod.
“i don’t care. want it.”
the pout on your lips. fuck. jungkook thanked the gods he was a better man, more patient, especially knowing you were doing this on purpose.
“always used to struggle to take me, hm? fucked you open every night and you’d still cry.”
jungkook reached forward, lips on your neck once more but this time, his hips began chasing yours, grinding down almost harshly, causing you to feel every inch, every vein against the flimsy material you called panties. it was heavenly
your hands grabbed him by his biceps, smaller hands unable to wrap around the circumference of his skin. how could you forget your nights of passion? he would spend hours between your legs, so mean, orgasm after orgasm and he still wouldn’t feel satisfied, an insatiable man to his core. even on nights you’d argue, it would somehow end in you fucking which meant the last eight months had been utter hell.
your poor fingers couldn’t reach far enough and nothing brought you to an orgasm unless you thought of him, imagining it was own digits instead of your own.
silly you - if only you realised how similar you and jungkook were. he couldn’t get off unless he was on your instagram, staring at your pretty eyes and lips as he tugged on his cock with all of his energy, round after round after round only to be constantly dissatisfied. having you below him, so ready to be his again? it fucked with his head.
“you'll make it fit.” you whispered.
within mere moments, neither of you could wait. his shorts, alongside the large tshirt that originally belonged to him were on the floor, leaving you in your lacy panties alone. his boxers strained against his hardened length which oozed precum at the mere sight of you, hips bucking a little as you watched him groan out loud at the wet patch forming against the flimsy material.
“my pretty pussy.” he whispered, just as he parted your legs. his fingers pushed your panties to the side, almost hissing from how damp they were, knowing you must have been needy for a while. “missed her. you’ve been holding out on me, baby.”
your eyelashes fluttered up at him at the first touch of his fingers running up and down your slit. you let out an airy moan, barely audible, your body immediately easing back into the covers now that you could finally feel him on you.
he suckled on your neck whilst he circled your clit, knowing your body better than anyone. you were both so in tune with each other’s wants and needs that an eight month break between you both meant nothing when he bit against the sweet spot on your neck all whilst applying more pressure.
you squeaked, nails digging into his biceps at the harshness of his fingers.
“fuck, you’re so needy.” he grunted, pulling away from your neck after leaving a hefty purple bruise. “not been touching your pussy the way it needs.”
“doesn’t feel..” you moaned louder. “doesn’t feel good if you don’t do it.”
his eyes almost rolled back at that. “yeah? need kookie to be the one to touch you?”
“mhm.”
at that, he pulled his hand away only resulting in a loud whine from you. so cruel, to have been given a taste, only to have it pulled away from you.
your positions, however, suddenly changed as jungkook realised the space on the bed was much smaller compared to the bed you had once shared. he rested his back on your wooden bed frame before grabbing you properly, resting you in his lap against his too hard cock, spreading your legs wide.
your back was against his chest, all whilst he caged you in, his fingers returning to your cunt immediately.
this new position had you so much more exposed, as he pushed your thighs apart, index finger circling your hole before slowly pushing inside. your eyebrows furrowed, watching him with a shake to your breath as he took his time, knowing a single one of his was the equivalent of two or three of your own - a though that had him wanting to fuck into you already.
the loud moan that left your lips once he fully inserted it was enough to have him kissing at your temple, cooing.
“like that?”
“feels big.” you whispered back with a shake, feeling him pump in and out.
at that, jungkook thought he was ready to fucking cum. even your pussy was as sweet as you were - too big? one finger and you were already fucked out, but he knew he had to stretch you to accommodate him, a thought that brought a nasty little smirk on his face.
“gotta fuck you open, baby. always so tight.” he continued to coo at you, all as you looked up at him, his finger being joined with another.
soon enough, he was roughly fingering you, all whilst you both maintained eye contact, often breaking it just to share a kiss as though neither of you could get closer to the other. the feeling of him inside you, just like you had become used to for so many years after months apart was the definition of pleasure, your eyes hooded with each pump.
“feels s’good.” you slurred slightly, chest heaving.
he watched your breasts, your bed squeaking with each passing movement and he fucking loved it. loved having your eyes on him, loved having your tits bounced everytime he’d fuck you open a little harder, your sweet moans filling the space.
you could feel how hard he was, but everytime you tried to turn to pleasure him too, he’d merely hold you tighter, as though your orgasm was the only objective on his mind. he wanted to eat you out, fuck - the thought had him all but growling at you but he knew he’d never last, promising himself he’d save that for later tonight.
“wish you knew how many times i’ve dreamt about this.” he grunted down at you, as he watched your thighs try to close from the onslaught of pleasure, only for him to widen them immediately. “i’m constantly fisting my cock thinking about you. at work, at home, in the fucking car.”
“what do you think about?” you pressed desperately, needing to hear it.
jungkook bared his teeth at you slightly, all whilst his pace quickened. “think about breeding you, pumping you full of cum till you’re begging me to stop. every morning, every night until you’re pregnant with our baby. you’d like that, hm?”
you could have sobbed. like was an understatement, your legs widening with each passing word as you nodded almost desperately at him, looking up and above where his head tilted down to watch you.
your eyes then fluttered shut at the image of him touching himself, almost shuddering out of relief at the thought of him so infatuated that he had to cum just to get you off of his mind. especially at work - the whole reason of your divorce being his dedication to his occupation and now knowing you had your affect on him there too? it was euphoric.
“think about you all the time.” you whimpered back at him, pout so cute he wanted to scream. “tried..fuck..tried to touch myself after the gala..but wasn’t enough.”
he watched as you shook your head up at him, one of your hands on his wrist as the same hand pumped faster inside of you at the admission. he cursed under his breath, letting out a deep exhale.
“should’ve told me. fuck, y/n. would’ve ruined you then, baby, you know that right?” he nuzzled into your cheek. “would’ve let you use me as much as you want.”
it was your turn to whimper under your breath, as your eyes shut tight at the familiar feeling in your stomach starting to creep up. it was shocking, how slowly it managed to creep on you, and yet you could feel every inch of its intensity, the first in a long time where you know you’d feel satisfied.
jungkook could feel you clenching, your too tight hole sucking him in desperately as a bid to have him go meaner on you, to which he was more than happy to oblige with. he grabbed your chin with his other hand, forcing your head back so you’d open your eyes again. he wanted to watch.
“eyes on me, pretty girl.”
you weren’t sure if it was the sweet way he cooed at you, or the brutal pace he was now forcing you to take but your orgasm hit you like a freight train. you let out a loud squeak as electricity fluttered through from your head to your toes, your hips rising whilst he continued to finger you through your high, hissing at how sexy you looked maintaining eye contact.
his pace didn’t lessen, devoted to longing out every hit of pleasure for as long as possible, your legs shaking as you pawed at his wrist, but he refused to stop. your body began falling into overstimulation, whining loudly as your weakened hands grabbed onto his, feeling him finally slow whilst he remained two fingers deep, pushed inside of you all the way to his knuckles.
he curled them one last time, causing a shaky breath to leave you before slowly removing them inch by inch.
the emptiness inside of you was horrible, a reminder of what else you wanted and how badly. your big eyes met his, only to watch him take his fingers press them against your pouted lips until they parted, your tongue wrapping around. you tasted yourself, a sweet sigh leaving his lips at the sight of you sucking so eagerly, his cock jolting harshly in his boxers.
“still don’t think you can take me right now.” he whispered down at you, other hand moved so it was openly cupping your pussy as a whole, palm brushing against your hypersensitive clit.
you jolted which each passing touch, breathing shaky before you took his fingers out of your mouth, saliva coating them where your slick once was.
“don’t care, kookie. i want it anyway.” you grumbled slightly, and he swore he had never loved you more.
it was your turn to move as you pulled away from his grasp, giggling a little to yourself at the look on his face once you put space between you, only to turn around, so you were laying on your stomach. he remained in his position, legs on either side of you allowing you to press your hand against his massive bulge.
oh, how you’d missed his cock.
you were as impatient as ever as you pulled his boxers down enough so that his fat cock could finally spring free, watching the way it tilted upwards at first, but its weight forced it down lower and lower until it was resting almost gently on your face.
he wanted to take a picture. wanted to make it his screen saver, your contact picture in his phone - he wanted it in his fucking wallet. his girl, eyes all hooded after being bratty for his cock? you were a minx and you didn’t even know it.
“don’t have a condom.” he found himself whispering at you, just as you began to pump him.
you tilted your head at him, hand unable to wrap around his length as you slowly teased his slit, fingers brushing against it just to him shudder. you watched his face, watched his very composure crumble before your very eyes all whilst he muttered something about a condom? your mind was barely working, still sensitive from the way he had made you cum and the horniness still in your stomach.
“why would i want you to wear a condom?” you whispered up at him, as though it was a little secret between you.
you watched his eyes darken in real time, narrowing down at you as both of his large hands grabbed the back of your head. you giggled, resting your cheek on his thigh whilst you continued to pump his cock, focusing on the tip just the way he liked it. the heaviness in your hand was what you missed the most, causing you to leave a little kiss to it on the mushroom tip, your fluttering eyes only driving him more and more insane.
he wouldn’t last like this. not with you staring up at him like that.
and so, he pulled your hair. you whimpered, pussy clenching as he pulled you up by your locks, your large eyes completely taken over by how rough he was being with you, no doubt being fuelled by the heightened emotions of the past two days. this was your favourite jungkook, secretly of course.
within seconds, you were on your back once more, all whilst he grabbed your hips and yanked you close to him. he dropped down to give you a kiss on your lips, savouring the taste and feel of you before beginning to rub his cock up and down your tight hole.
“my girl.” he whispered against your mouth. “no going back after this.”
your eyes clenched shut at the feeling of him teasing you, pushing the tip against your hole only to pull back the second it began inserting, rubbing it up and down and over your clit once more. he was a tease through and through, but you were too needy to see reason.
“don’t wanna go back, want it all.” you simply whimpered back.
your words were enough to finally have him pushing inside of you.
first, the tip. your face contorted to the familiar feel of his cock slowly inserting inside of you, your breath catching slightly at the sheer size of him - you struggled to take him even when your sex life was incredibly active, so you knew now that you hadn’t been touched for eight months, this was going to be hard.
you watched his face harden, all whilst your eyes slipped downwards to see him pushing further in, inch by inch, until your fingernails were puncturing the skin of his outer arms. he watched your face instead, willing himself not to cum at the way your jaw grew slack, big eyes only widening further at the too large cock settling in inside of you.
it was too much, too big, too at once. you couldn’t think, could barely see and yet you couldn’t pull yourself away from watching him bottom out even if you wanted to, a slight bulge evident where he sat deep inside of you. his large hand took a hold of yours and kissed it before pressing it against the bulge, only to rest his own right on top. applying pressure, he hissed at the way you let out a loud whimper, your cute thighs trembling around him.
“feel that?” he whispered down at you, nuzzling your nose to force you to look at him. “thats where i fucking belong. this pussy stretches so good for me every time.”
your lip was already trembling, a sight that had his cock throbbing deep inside of you as you clenched down on him hard. his cry baby - he loved seeing you teary during sex.
you were still adjusting as he began to move, causing you to squeal, but jungkook couldn’t wait anymore, not when he’d been dealt with blue balls for close to a year. you were the only option, pledging to live a life of fucking celibacy if you’d have chosen to never let him inbetween your legs again though the thought killed him inside. live a life without a taste of your sweet pussy? he’d sooner die.
“jungkook!” you slapped the tops of his biceps, as he continued his thrusting inside of you, nipping at your jaw, feeling his smirk against your skin.
the feeling of him thrusting in and out of you was intense, something you had been craving for so long now and yet now it was happening, you wanted more, and more and more and more and more. he loved this shy game you’d always play, always pretending like you couldn’t take it despite the fact your legs were widening further and you were moaning like a bitch in heat - it turned him on beyond words to know underneath the sweet persona, you were the filthiest slut he had ever known.
his pace was deep, mean but slow and it wasn’t enough, purposefully done to tease you for as long as he could, to ensure you’d stay needy. it was clearly working with the way your moans, whines and gasps filled the air only to be followed with a long drawl of his name, face scrunched up so cute he wanted to fucking scream.
“c’mon, baby, you’re so good to me.” he cooed, continuing his slow thrusts. “just gotta ask if you want something.”
your eyes scrunched shut, whimpering at his words knowing he wanted you in ways that you had reminisced on for months, the feeling of him kissing the gummy part of your cunt something you had missed so much.
“want it properly, kookie.” you begged him, though you couldn’t meet his gaze, eyes flickering down to his neck as he continued his pace. “yeah? tell kookie how you want it.”
your fingers clung to his shoulders as he came down, arms now pressed on either side of your head as he nuzzled your nose with his own, actions too sweet given the sinful position he had you in.
your breathing was ragged, the feel of him inside you too much for your poor little mind to handle without breaking and yet it wasn’t nearly enough. you craved something harsher, meaner, more jungkook. neither of you had ever been ones for soft sex, always preferring it as needy as possible which only heightened considering the fact you were both so utterly obsessive when it came to the other.
you whined loudly as his actions came to a stop completely, now grinding against you whilst still being inside.
“just want you to fuck me properly.” you whimpered, lip quivering so much faster, hips lifting to meet his as a means to relieve yourself.
god. you were killing him.
“good girl.”
jungkook planted a single kiss to your lips, oddly sweet before pulling back, planting two more to your forehead and nose. you were ready to whine once more until you felt his hips pull back, only to thrust into you harshly.
you squealed as jungkook began his pace exactly how you craved it, exactly how you used to picture with your own fingers in your cunt, desperately trying and failing to replicate the feel. hard. fast. mean. rough.
your neighbours would no doubt complain tomorrow with the way your bed frame began pounding into the wall, his head pressed against yours as his thrusts began kissing your cervix. your legs shook around him, much to his enjoyment, all whilst he forced you to maintain eye contact, wanting so badly to see the affect he was having on you after he had been deprived of you for so long.
“fuck..there she is. that’s my girl.” he hissed down at you, not holding back, the sound of skin slapping against skin heavy in the room. “you don’t know how badly i missed you.”
“m-missed..ugh! missed you..too..” you managed to string together, salted tears now escaping your eyes as they streamed on either side of the pillow.
“pretty girl like you needs to be fucked mean. no good to be nice to you, huh?” he growled down at you, only causing your lip to quiver that much faster as you nodded. “can’t think unless it’s me bullying your pussy into an orgasm.”
your nods were paired with soft sobs as he pounded, ruining your soppy core just like you had wanted. you had dreamt of this, dreamt of him, genuinely believing you’d never reach this state of pleasure ever again in your life and yet here he was, coaxing it out of you to remind you that he’d never leave you again.
his thrusts were sloppier than usual, no doubt due to the extensive length between your last fuck but it only had you moaning and crying louder. the thought of the usually composed jeon jungkook a whining mess for you and you alone had you clamping down hard on his cock.
“can’t believe i let you leave me.” he grunted hard at the feel of you getting so tight, gritting his teeth as he pounded you further. “never again. you fucking hear me, y/n? you’re my wife forever.”
“promise?” you sobbed back, arms now wrapping around his neck as you tried to bring him impossibly closer, as though you could in any capacity.
he nipped at your bottom lip, moaning into your mouth at the way you all but begged him to make it a reality.
“gonna take you to the courthouse tomorrow, get you a nice dress and we do..fuck..we do this again, understand?” he closed his eyes the more you whined and whined. “gonna let me put that ring back on your fucking finger, baby?”
you nodded wildly, just as you felt your orgasm build up in your stomach again, whining loudly up at him in a way he recognised immediately. fuck, he had missed this so much - his angel girl, all needy, begging for it even though she could barely take it. he could feel his own coming on fast, causing him to pull his hand down and rub at your clit, hissing at the feeling of you clamping down on his cock harshly.
“c’mon baby. want you to cum on your husband’s cock, hm? gonna get you nice and round like you deserve.” his thrusts only got meaner. “move you back in. fuck this pussy every single day, just like you need.”
your high rushed through you at the exact point his did, your legs wrapping around his waist as a means to keep him inside. you could feel it all through your body, the way it seized up and bucked into him all whilst he continued his thrusts, fucking you through both of your orgasms.
your vision started growing dark, the intensity of it overwhelming as he rode out your highs whilst whispering soft i love you’s in your ear, cradling you to his chest, holding you closer than you’d ever felt him before.
everything after that completely blurred together.
you remembered jungkook taking care of you, tenderness laced into his very being as he held you like you were akin to a porcelain doll - sweet, so soft, so delicate. somewhere between the damp kisses pressed to your skin underneath the bubbling bath he had drawn for you both, to the continuous declarations of love muttered down at you; you realised that this was inevitable. he was inevitable.
there didn’t exist a reality where you both could live without one another - you knew that now.
even after the heartbreak, the divorce, the loneliness and the debilitating grief, you still found yourself exactly where you belonged. your cheek pressed against his chest, his heartbeat soothing you into a dreamlike state which paled in comparison to the reality that was now yours. his love had you wrapped so tightly you knew you’d never live without it again.
you were finally home.
—
this beast of a fic is finally done yay!!! i hope you guys love ex husband jungkook just as much as i do!
tried to make him less yandere in this one and more pathetic yearner lol but i may have slipped here and there 💔
i’d love to hear your thoughts on this - love hearing you guys after a fic drops so i’m excited to see what you all think!!!!
if you wanna help support me pay my disgusting, awful, horrific london rent, my kofi is linked <3
This is incredibly self indulgent, I wrote it at midnight and then went to sleep feeling a little better, so at least it worked LOL
tw: weight loss/gain, fuck the beauty industry, evading emotions
Summary: you're feeling a little down about your body, even all the way on Erid. ryland is there to pick you back up
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One thing about the last decade or so is that your body went through a lot of changes. From comfortably average on earth, to absolutely jacked while on the hail mary (thank you coma electrodes), to malnourished and frail on the trip to Erid, you’ve kind of been through the ringer physically. Rocky had been able to get help with food as soon as he touched down on his planet, working with whole teams to get food made that you and Ryland could eat. It didn’t always taste good, and the nutritional value varied with each meal, but it did the job and got you both back on your feet.
All things considered, you knew you were lucky to be where you are. So it felt a little silly when you caught sight of your reflection after stepping out of the shower and recoiled just a little. You didn’t mean to, it’s just that you didn’t remember ever looking how you do right now. Your body felt softer, jiggled a little bit more than you were used to, and you noticed a few stretch marks forming along your thighs and stomach.
You got dressed and decided to go on a walk to clear your head. You needed to do daily affirmations or something, meditate the earth programming away. Because that’s what it is, you’re stuck on beauty standards that do not have any bearing on your life anymore. It was normal to hate your body on earth - only because your insecurity put money in the pockets of greedy fucks in power but that’s neither here nor there - but on Erid, you were free of judging eyes and cruel words and other people’s expectations.
The walk helped, reminded you that you’re in a biodome on an alien planet that you saved. No one here had any preconceived notions about what beauty is for a human, in fact you had an inkling that they thought your bodies were kind of gross by nature, which you couldn’t blame them for. With absolutely no outside pressure, you knew that this was all in your head. Turns out, it’s hard to break a lifetime of conditioning even when all oppressive factors are removed. Who would have thought?
You waved at Ryland and his class from the beach, laughing as the Eridian students went crazy. Ryland waved with a smile, blowing you a kiss before turning back to the class and playing a few chords on his organ to regain order.
The rest of your walk was quiet, you let the sound of the waves drown out the thoughts causing your spiral. You knew you needed to keep busy today, needed to give your brain something else to think about. The stack of schematics on your desk in the house was the perfect task to tackle. Adrian had brought some plans they wanted you to look over - they were making anything and everything that they learned about on their laptop. Power tools, appliances, clothing, whatever they found, they tried to make. It was the perfect way to spend a few hours, losing yourself in measurements and material compounds.
When Ryland returned home, he launched right into how excited his students were to see you, saying that they wanted you to come by again to help teach soon. He asked all about what you had been working on, always so interested by how you talk about engineering on Erid. It was how you could translate human-speak to Eridian-speak in a way they would understand that he admired.
The rest of the day goes by peacefully, until nightfall. You excuse yourself from the couch, brushing your teeth and grabbing a big pj shirt from the dresser. You don’t mean to look in the mirror when you tug your shirt over your head, but it’s like you can’t help yourself. The negative feelings come crashing back, overwhelming your senses for a second. You change quickly, all but running right into Ryland as you leave the bathroom in a hurry.
“Whoa, hey, what’s the rush?” His hands land on your arms, steadying you. “Sorry, sorry,” you hear the emotion in your voice, cursing yourself for not holding it together better. He hears it too, and he bends down a little to see your face. Your eyes were watery, shining with unshed tears. “Sweetheart, what happened?” He’s so gentle when he asks.
You shake your head, a tear slipping down your cheek. “Nothing, Ry. It’s silly.”
He lets out a breath, studying your face to see if he can figure it out himself. “You’re the most rational person I know,” he starts, “if it’s got you like this then I promise it’s not silly.” You consider lying to him, then feel bad for even thinking it. His hands run up and down your arms, letting you figure out whatever you were working through.
“Do you… do you think I’m pretty?” It comes out so quietly he almost doesn’t hear you. “Of course I do,” he sounds a little incredulous, not following at all. “It’s just, I’ve… I’ve gained some weight, and I don’t feel like myself and I just… want to be pretty… for you.” You’re whispering, like you’re afraid to say it any louder.
“And I know that we’re lucky to even be here, it’s a scientific miracle that they can make food for us at all, and we shouldn’t even have survived the trip but -” you’re rambling, but the floodgates are open and you don’t think you can stop it, “I just don’t feel like I used to. It’s silly, though, to be worried about how I look when we’re lightyears away from anyone who would have anything to say and -”
Ryland kisses you. His hands cup your cheeks, thumbs wiping away the tears that you couldn’t stop. Your eyes flutter shut, lungs burning as you suck in a deep breath, trying to keep the sob clawing its way up your throat at bay. Ryland drops his forehead against yours, giving you a second to compose yourself before he’s pulling you into the bathroom.
He stands you in front of the mirror, planting himself behind you, arms wrapped around your stomach. You keep your eyes on the floor and he doesn’t like that. “Look at yourself, baby.” It’s a soft command, his hand coming up to lift your chin. “You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. So fuckin’ perfect,” he kisses your cheek, your temple, hands stroking your sides tenderly. You can’t help the tears leaving tracks down your face, it’s almost embarrassing how sweetly he’s looking at you.
“This body has gotten you through so much, it’s so, so strong. You’ve saved worlds in this body, survived so much more than anyone ever should, and you’ve done it all so gracefully.” He wipes your tears again, “I love your body, more than you could ever know.” His hands slide down your sides, landing on your thighs. “I love your legs, how soft they are, how they always feel like home when I lay my head on them.”
His hands squeeze your flesh before moving again, they stop just below your waist. “Love these hips, how they sway so perfectly.” He sways you back and forth, as if proving his point. “I love your brain most, though,” a smile presses into your hair. “I love how quick you are with jokes, how smart you are, how much you care about everyone you meet.”
You wanted to stop him, to tell him that he didn’t need to do all this, but his words were wrapping around your heart, consoling your innermost self.
“I love that you tried to logic your way out of self-doubt, that’s exactly what you would do, but sometimes things like this can’t just be solved. It’s okay to feel, please don’t bottle things like this up.” He looks at you in the mirror, you feel exposed under his gaze. “I’ll always have time to tell you just how much I love you. Your heart, your mind, your body, all of you.”
You turn and wrap your arms around him, burying your face in his chest and willing the tears to stop. He returns the hug immediately, stroking your back with firm hands. He lets you cry, holds you until your breath evens out and you sheepishly pull away. One look at your face has him pulling you to the bed, he lays down on his side and beckons you to do the same.
You lie next to him, snuggling into his warm body and breathing in his scent. His arms pull you in as close as you can get, like he can pass his love to you through touch alone. You soak in him for a few minutes before you finally break the silence with a quiet laugh.
“You’re right, I did try to logic my way out of feeling like this,” your voice is rough. “I was like, unreasonably mad at the beauty industry this morning.”
“I don’t think that’s unreasonable at all. They profit off of insecurity, sell the cure,” he shrugs. “Makes sense you’d be angry with them.”
You look up just enough to see his face, “thank you for being here.”
“Thank you for telling me, baby. I need you to know how fucking beautiful you are, absolutely stunning,” he breathes the last few words.
His fingers tap against your back in thought, then “not to mention, your ass looks amazing when I take you from behind.” It makes you laugh, hand pushing his chest in protest. “Ryland!”
“Sorry, sorry, just thought you should know that too!” He laughs with you, hand sliding down to squeeze your butt.
You lean up and kiss him, “I love you, Ry.”
“I love you too, sweet girl.”
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little break from the smut but dw i'll be back to it
The collection of random smut moments that I tied together with an interesting plot for a College!RylandGrace x College!Reader AU... I think I have a problem. The following lists are for the written order (order that I wrote each one in over the last month) and the chronological order (order in which each part occurs). I think I prefer the written order, but some of it makes more sense in the chronological order, so that's why I'm giving you the option for how you want to read it.
‼️WARNING‼️ : every single part has NSFW content. 18+ only, MDNI!!
Written Order
Dissertations + Distress DONE
Too Much? DONE
Adrenaline DONE
First Time for Everything IN PROGRESS
Graduation Celebration! IN PROGRESS
In The Beginning… DONE
Dissertations + Distress PT.2 DONE
Right Now DONE
Spacial Tendencies IN PROGRESS (very long final part)
Chronological Order
In The Beginning… [first kiss, year 2]
First Time for Everything ["random pill" first time, year 3]
Too Much? [in the lab, year 3]
Adrenaline [teasing leads punishment, year 4]
Dissertations + Distress [parallel play shenanigans, year 4]
Dissertations + Distress PT.2 [post-nap + officially dating, year 4]
Right Now [more teasing, year 5]
Graduation Celebration! [graduation night + the confession, year 5]
Spacial Tendencies [during PHM after taumoeba leak in space, 10 years after grad school]
summary: during your period, eridians, Rocky, and his mate, Adrian, fuss over you! eridians purr. and rocky getting mad ragebaited at the idea of human 'engineering' (part of da 'saturday cuddles' universe!)
yaps!: thank you so much @saturnhas274moons for recommending this idea to me!! mhwamhwa, hope u like this..hehe..ook enough of angst (for now), for my next fic, what would u guys want?? more fluff or ANGST..lmk! listened to "Saturn" by Sleeping At Last, and "And The Winner is" while making this!
You are curled into a tight ball on the "bed"—that massive, reinforced platform layered with every soft textile and scrap of insulating foam salvaged from the Hail Mary. Every few minutes, a sharp, white-hot wave of pain rolls through your abdomen, a familiar monthly visitor that feels particularly cruel when you’re light-years away from a pharmacy.
Under your shirt, the jagged line of your "Rocky Scar"—the mark left behind when your Eridian friend saved your life—pulses in sympathy-like with the cramps. It’s a reminder of survival, but right now, you just feel like a mess of malfunctioning nerves and a waste of carbon.
A heavy, metallic thump-clack echoes across the floor. You don't have to look up to know it’s Rocky. His five-legged structure is as familiar to you as your own mind. Beside him, the lighter, more melodic tapping of Adrian’s claws follows.
"Question?" Rocky’s synthesizer voice rings out from the nightstand, clear and inquisitive. "Why is Human Y/N still in the insulation pile? The 'sun' has cycled twice. Teaching time is soon. Grace confused. I also confused."
You groan into your pillow, a sound that translates to the Eridians as a low-frequency distress signal. Adrian moves closer, her form rotating with concern. She reaches out a warm, stone-like limb, hovering it just inches from your back.
“Temperature is high,” Adrian’s whistles and clicks are translated by the small device clipped to her harness. “You are leaking heat. Is there a hull breach in your biology? Is human dying!? Please do not die! It would be very inconvenient and sad.”
"I'm not dying, Adrian," you wheeze out, squeezing your eyes shut as another cramp ripples through you. "It’s just... a human thing. My body is resetting. It hurts. A lot."
Ryland wanders in then, looking disheveled, holding a mug of chamomile tea the Eridians replicated. He sees the three of you huddled together and immediately softens. He knows the look in your eyes; he’s seen you power through lab accidents and alien microbes, but he knows this particular brand of misery is one that requires total surrender.
"They're worried about you," Ryland says softly, sitting on the edge of the platform and placing a hand on your shoulder. "Rocky thinks you’re melting because your core temp jumped a degree. I tried to explain human reproductive cycles to him, but he just got offended that your body 'destroys its own systems' once a month. He thinks it’s bad engineering."
“It IS bad engineering!” Rocky interjects, his claws clicking rapidly against the floor. “Why break the internal walls? Just keep the walls! If I built a ship that melted its floor every thirty days, Grace yell at me!”
"He's not wrong," you mutter, pressing your face into Ryland's thigh. "Ryland, tell them I'm okay. I just need to be a potato for about four days."
Adrian tilts her head, her 'eye' focusing on where you are clutching your stomach. “You are in pain. Pain is for when predators bite. There are no predators in the dome. Except maybe the vacuum, but the dome is strong. If you are in pain, we must fix.”
"You can't fix it, Adrian," Ryland says, stroking your hair. "It just has to happen. Heat helps, though."
The word heat seems to trigger something in the Eridian pair. On a planet where the surface temperature could melt lead, "heat" is their specialty. They are technically biological furnaces, their carapaces radiating a steady, dry warmth that far exceeds any electric heating pad.
Rocky steps up onto the platform. The bed groans under his weight, but it’s sturdy. “I am heat, statement.” he declares with a flourish of his limbs. “I very good at being hot. I am the best heater on Erid. Adrian is also a good heater. We will insulate the problem.”
Before you can protest, Rocky moves with surprising gentleness. He doesn't crowd you; instead, he maneuvers his heavy, five-sided body so that he is braced against your back, his warm carapace pressing firmly against your spine. The heat is immediate and intense, sinking through your shirt and into your aching muscles. It’s a dry, deep warmth that seems to vibrate.
Adrian doesn't want to be left out. She climbs onto the other side, tucking her limbs in and resting her front-side near your abdomen, being careful not to put her full weight on you. She feels like a living stone warmed by a desert sun.
Ryland watches them with a look of pure, unadulterated affection, full of care. "I think you've been secured by the Eridian Heating Company," he jokes. He crawls into the middle of the pile, slotting himself behind Rocky so he can still reach over and hold your hand.
"This is... actually amazing," you whisper. The crushing weight of the Eridians combined with their radiating heat acts like a full-body pressure therapy. The sharp stabs in your stomach begin to dull into a heavy, manageable ache.
Then, the sound starts.
It begins as a low-frequency hum, so deep you feel it in your teeth before you hear it. It’s a rhythmic, pulsing vibration coming from both Rocky and Adrian. It isn't the musical whistling of their speech; it’s more primal, a steady thrum-thrum-thrum that echoes the beat of your own heart.
"Are they... purring?" you ask, your eyes fluttering shut as the tension finally drains from your shoulders.
"Yeah," Ryland whispers, his voice thick with sleepiness. "Rocky told me about this once. When they have 'pebbles'—their young—they communal-sleep. They produce a resonance in their carapaces. It’s meant to stabilize the heart rates of the young and keep them calm while they grow. It’s a biological lullaby."
“You are small,” Rocky’s translator chirps, though his voice is lower now, hushed. “You are un-harmonic. You are pebble today. We vibrate buzz pain away. Sleep now, statement. Grace, sleep. You are noisy when worry.”
Ryland chuckles, his fingers interlacing with yours. "Copy that, Rock'. Sleeping now."
The dome is silent save for that incredible, ancient purring. It’s a sound that has existed on Erid for millions of years, a song of protection and kinship. Nestled between the two aliens and the man who traveled across the stars with you, the pain in your body feels insignificant.
You feel the scar on your side—the one that matches the one on Ryland's arm. It feels warm, almost glowing against the heat of Rocky's shell. You aren't just a human in a dome anymore; you are part of their kin, a family that doesn't care about biology or species, only about the fact that one of their own is hurting.
The lavender and apricot light of the artificial sunset fades into a deep, restful indigo. As the Eridian purring synchronizes, your breathing slows. Ryland’s head drops onto your shoulder, his breath hitching in a soft, rhythmic snore. Adrian shifts her weight, her claws making a tiny, comforting tink against the bed frame.
The last thing you feel before falling into a deep, dreamless sleep is the overwhelming sensation of being loved—not just by a man, but by a planet. You are tucked into the safest place in the universe: a cuddle pile at the edge of the galaxy, guarded by two biological furnaces who think you’re a very poorly engineered, but very dear, friend.
Outside, the Eridian winds howl and bash against the glass, but inside, there is only the warmth, the purring, and the steady, unbreakable bond of home.
yippee, WHAT DO WE THINK GAIS.....once again, many thanks to @/saturnhas274moons and friends for proof-reading/inspiration! much love, Aντίο, atsisveikink, paalam, and adiós! thanks 4 reading!1! 💚🤞 next fic might be ry n u meeting rocky and adrians pebbles EHEHEHEHE....👀
You aren't just a human in a dome anymore; you are part of their kin, a family that doesn't care about biology or species, only about the fact that one of their own is hurting.
Warnings: Injured reader, mention of panic attack? Grace is worried. This was supposed to just be an imagine but it ended up being longer than that. Use of medical equipment such as an oxygen mask, IVs, tubes, etc.
Grace's voice crackled through the comms, cutting in and out as you got further and further away from the control room. "Where... You? Not... cameras?"
The radio fuzz was irritating and distracting. You banged your helmet a couple of times to try and get it to shut up. Your breath came in haggard gasps as you trudged back toward the control room, vision blurry and disoriented. Every step hurt your entire body.
This was supposed to have been a normal, average check on the ship after passing through a minor asteroid field. You hadn't anticipated your foot becoming entangled in the tether, nor a stray meteorite knocking you clean off the hull and causing you to get yanked back by your leg. Nothing is broken, you think, but it burns like hell. You've certainly torn something. If it weren't for the whole no-gravity-in-space thing, you probably wouldn't be standing.
The asteroid field had knocked out the surveillance systems, so you were on your own until you got back inside the Hail Mary. Neither Grace nor Rocky knew what was wrong with you, and apparently the meteorite that knocked you off the ship damaged your comms, too.
"Y/N," Rocky's translated, computerized voice trickled through the radio roughly in a series of broken bits of speech. "Un... See... What..."
It was loud, and too much. Every step was like fire. Maybe you were close to some cameras by now.
Your vision blurred as the pain worsened. Okay, maybe you did break something. Hopefully not, but sharp, hot tears came suddenly as the adrenaline finally wore off and your body began to tremble uncontrollably from the pain. The tether was still wrapped around your leg, but you couldn't think straight to remove it. Logically, you knew you had to, but your head was still spinning from how quickly you'd been snapped back toward the ship.
Movement caught your eye, and you braced for another meteorite. Immediately, you relaxed. Grace.
He'd hurriedly put on his EVA suit to come get you, glasses askew inside the helmet. The second you saw him, his face dropped. You couldn't hear him as he tried to speak, but he was talking fast, brow furrowed. It might be a bit useless, but you gestured helplessly to your wounded leg. The utter silence besides your breathing was starting to freak you out.
Grace went into action like a sleeper agent, rushing over like he was a trained astronaut and cutting the tether free from you. The relief was only brief-- the pain came back full force and you cried out, glad he couldn't hear it. You couldn't focus on much of anything now; Grace clipped you to him and began helping you back to the airlock.
Once the door was sealed, you saw the stars begin to move outside as Rocky put the ship in centrifugal mode, probably using one of the handy probes you'd made him for just such a purpose.
Gravity, however, was the last thing you needed right now.
There was a sudden rush of noise and chaos as you both fell to the floor; Grace might have done a little better if he didn't have your full weight in the suit, but also if you wouldn't have started screaming.
You couldn't help it. You tried not to, tried to force yourself to stop, but the excruciating damage had left your leg utterly limp and filled with an intense pain the likes of which you'd never felt. Grace yanked off your helmet. "Y/N, I need you to tell me where it hurts. I can't help you if I don't know what's wrong." He was trying to be strong, but his voice was shaking.
Gasping for breath and coherency, you managed to put together a string of words behind clenched teeth. "Meteorite knocked me off the ship. Leg got tangled in tether. I think it's broken."
Grace braced you with one arm behind your back. "This is gonna hurt, I'm sorry!" He swept an arm under your knees and lifted you, suit and all, carrying you to Armando as fast as he could. Rocky rolled along behind him, wise to stay out of the way.
"She might have a broken leg, bud," Grace explained quickly as he laid you down on the table. Several robotic arms reached out of the ceiling for you, eager to help as Grace stepped back.
Wildly, you snatched his hand. You two had always had clear, unbroken boundaries. Physical contact was limited and you stayed civil, but your jobs were to put the mission first and... whatever was between you both second. You weren't trying to be the next Adam and Eve, but feelings had begun to sprout regardless. You both tried to keep it professional. At least until this was all over, and distractions weren't going to matter anymore.
Now, though, you didn't care. "Please stay with me," You begged, feeling the tears run towards your ears as Armando placed a mask on you. A gentle gas began filtering through the tubing system to your lungs. "Don't leave me, Grace."
Grace hesitated, eyes wide, then reached behind him and snatched a chair. He swung it closer and sat down, clenching your hand tightly in both of his. "I'm not going anywhere. Promise."
You woke up three days later.
Or, it was around three days. Armando said you slept for 68.5 hours and it repaired a badly fractured leg, and that you'd be fine in 6 to 8 weeks. Light activity preferred. You were gonna be on some heavy painkillers. In no uncertain terms were you to even leave the bed without assistance, since the cast wasn't as sturdy as it would have been on Earth.
Inwardly, you wondered what this would do for the mission. You couldn't spacewalk, floating around would be a pain, or even getting to the control room in general. It was a tight fit on a normal day. With a cast it would probably be impossible. God, and Grace would have to help you. What you could do by yourself right now was limited. Just when you'd both decided that you didn't need any unnecessary proximity so you could get the mission taken care of without any distractions. What would this do to the ship? Would you have to remain in 1g? Or would 0g work, too? Would you still be pressing on to Tau Ceti E?
You tried to reach up and pull off the mask, but your limbs were still tingly and uncoordinated. You smacked yourself in the face by accident, clawing for the straps. Only oxygen was coming through the tubing, and you needed it off.
A small gasp came from your right. "Amaze! Y/N awake! Bad bad bad hurt. Better now! Grace not leave for long time. Rocky force Grace to change clothes. Grace!" You heard (and felt) the rumble of his xenonite ball as he careened for the entrance to the medbay, but you could only focus on getting the damn mask off your face. You were struggling with the strap, trying to get it off and vaguely aware of Rocky urging Grace to come quickly.
You were starting to panic. Your breath came in short, sharp bursts. All you could hear was your own labored breathing as the images of struggling for the airlock alone flashed through your head, your leg throbbing in pain as you remembered being violently yanked back towards the ship--
Grace. Gentle but fast, he slipped the mask off your face and pulled the tube from your throat, making you gag-- when had Armando put that in? As you coughed and spluttered on the bed, Grace was trying to talk to you. "Rock, just stay still for a second, okay? Y/N-- Hey-- it's okay, it's okay..." You heaved horribly as you struggled to come back to life, curling up on the cot. You felt an IV still in the crook of your left arm and shuddered at the sensation of icy fluids being pumped into your veins. Every breath was shaky.
Then you felt his hands on you. One squeezed your arm as he leaned over you to try and see your face, the other rubbed soothing circles in your back. You'd never been so glad for physical touch. "Breathe. Just breathe. You're safe now, Rocky's here; we've got you."
He sat with you until you were able to function a bit easier, although it came slowly. You're not sure how long you were disoriented. You peered at Grace over your shoulder, slowly flopping onto your back. He looked a mess, blond hair sticking in every direction and glasses ever-so-slightly askew. It bothered you. It always bothered you that his glasses were crooked. You always tried to remind him that farsighted and sloppy were two totally separate things.
Without thinking, you reached up and straightened his glasses with a frown. To your utter surprise, his hand found your elbow and traveled up to hold your wrist, keeping you close to him. You flushed, his deep blue eyes not breaking contact with yours. "Uh..." You croaked helplessly, "The morphine made me do it."
Grace smiled, something a bit lopsided but relieved as he chuckled quietly, almost to himself. He blinked rapidly as his eyes glistened. "I couldn't see you on the cameras," He managed softly, voice cracking. "I lost sight of you. Then Rocky saw it." He swallowed hard, caressing your hand still near his face with his thumb. "The meteorite. I tried to warn you. The radio wasn't working. He said it hit you, but after that we still couldn't get through. I went to get in the suit but I wasn't fast enough. Your leg..."
"Mangled," Rocky added sullenly, "Rocky had to learn new word. Leg bent in all ways."
Grace still hadn't broken eye contact with you. "Yeah. That. I'm..." You watched, stunned, as tears started streaming down his face. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I sent you out there by yourself, and that I wasn't quicker coming to get you."
"Grace," You choked, "It wasn't your fault. It could've happened to any of us. I was just unlucky enough for it to happen to me." You let your hand relax in his grip, letting your knuckles brush against his temple. "...Now you've gotta take care of me, I guess. I'm sorry I didn't see the--"
"Is no one fault. No apology." Rocky sounded irritated. "We take care of Y/N. Y/N can only walk in 0 gravity. Grace must slow mission down."
Rocky-- thankfully-- was entirely unaware of what was happening between you and Grace. You two had had moments before Rocky had ever come aboard, moments where longing stares left the two of you in awkward silence and the brush of his hand against yours felt like it lasted forever. It led to a couple of awkward but factual conversations about what it meant that you two were having these emotions in close quarters, that you'd eventually die together and that the mission came first-- which required utmost focus. Nothing could happen before then.
That seemed to completely shatter now.
Careful of your IV, Grace cautiously pulled you up into the sitting position and wrapped his arms tightly around you in a warm hug, burying his face in the crook of your shoulder. You didn't hesitate to throw your arms around his neck, hiding your face in his body and getting as close as humanly possible.
Now Rocky noticed.
His five feet started excitedly tapping. "Oh oh oh! Hug! Good good good! Hugging not done alone!" A bit more quietly, he added, "...Can Rocky get hug too, question?"
Grace laughed into your shoulder as he pulled back to look at him. "Yes, Rock. You get one too." He held you close still, taking a deep breath and avoiding your gaze by staring at the fabric of the blanket. "Can I be totally honest about something?"
"What?" Your stomach twisted nervously. You weren't sure why.
He forced himself to look at you. "I don't want to wait for the mission to be over. I almost lost you today. If something goes wrong on this mission--"
"Oh thank God," You let yourself fall limp against his chest, surprising him. He let out a soft "Oh" as you chuckled. "It's been pulling me apart to wait. So can we go on a date now? Like with tube-spaghetti and fake moonlit water habitats and everything?"
He chuckled, rubbing your back. "Yes, and yes. I'll wear my best jumpsuit."
"What is date, question?"
You looked over at your rock-faced friend and gestured vaguely at the arm with his marriage signet. "Did you and Adrian have a courtship faze?"
"Yes," Rocky hummed thoughtfully, "Many days. Sing very long. Try to impress--" He went absolutely straight as he realized what you meant. "Amaze! Excite! Grace will impress you will tube-spaghetti!" He started doing jazz hands, dancing in place a little. "Excite excite excite! Finally!"
"What do you mean, 'finally'?" Grace challenged, taken aback.
Rocky ignored him. "Rocky want hug now. Y/N need rest, need sleep for big date."
Grace still hadn't let go of you. "I have an idea, but don't crush us, okay?"
"Rocky understand."
"What's your idea?" You challenged. Grace grinned smugly at you as he reached under the cot and pressed a button. Slowly, the cot began to sink to the floor. There was a mattress under you, thankfully, albeit a thin one. Grace held up a finger for you to wait as he stood and walked away, inadvertently freezing both you and Rocky.
You glanced sideways at your alien friend and opened an arm toward him. "C'mere, bud." Excitedly, Rocky rolled over. You felt the heat of his body through the xenonite. It was comforting.
When Grace returned, he had his own mattress and tons of blankets, all of which he piled together before gently moving you aside and adding yours to the pile. Carefully, he scooped you up afterward and sat you on the makeshift bed, which was extremely comfortable. "Here. Now Rocky can sit with you and keep you warm. You can watch her sleep, right?"
"Yes," Rocky answered, curling up in his ball as close as he could get without burning you.
You hummed gratefully, patting his ball. "Like my own personal radiator. What about you, Grace?"
"I'm going to let you sleep," He answered, confused. Clueless, more like.
You heaved a deep breath, pressing your palm harder against Rocky's ball for good luck. "Can you stay? Just for tonight?"
Grace hesitated a moment longer before making his way over, to the delight of Rocky, who began trilling excitedly. He set his glasses to the side, out of the way of Rocky's path, and slipped under the covers beside you a bit awkwardly. His cheeks were flushed as he refused to look at you. "Okay, yeah. I guess I need sleep t--" He froze as you scooted closer, pressing your body flush against his the best you could with your injured leg. Instinct seemed to take over; he slid one arm under your head, and the other around your torso.
Now, you were both fully snuggling close together, boundaries be damned. Beside you, Rocky kept the both of you very warm and cozy as the ship dimmed its lights. You dozed off as Grace played with your hair drowsily. In your half-asleep, medicated state, you smiled warmly.
Summary: Rocky is watching over Grace sleep while you work. Rocky comes running in, scared for Grace, and needs your help.
Ryland Grace x Reader - Comfort fic
Good night Grace."
"Good night!"
"Have fun, Rocky!"
"Rocky watch Grace sleep! Rocky is good friend."
You watched as the two went off to where the sleeping pods were. Grace had been staying up, way past the scheduled night time mode in Hail Mary, leading to a mistake that nearly cost you and Rocky hours of time working on how to create food for you and Grace.
You hadn't even needed to shout. Rocky had some choice words with Grace, probably including some curse words that Grace refused to put into the language program. It had all ended with Grace accepting his need to sleep when Rocky had said, "Need strong word for not thinking fast. More strong than stupid. Grace need sleep or Rocky need word for make Grace sleep."
At that, you had told Grace to go sleep while you work for another few hours. You did follow the scheduled times. Although you hated being away from your important work, literally life or slow death in your case, you knew that you would make more progress if your brain was not tired.
You heard faint musical notes, the friendly voice of the language program, and Grace speaking from your spot in the lab. It was hard to focus with sound in the background, especially when doing math, so you threw on some headphones, listening to some music to motivate you to finish your work before you yourself went to bed.
The Hail Mary could be peaceful at times like this. Faint light from the windows would slowly brighten the room and then shadows would overtake the areas where the artificial lights didn't reach as well. You scribbled notes on your paper, using your laptop to look up equations and nutritional information that you needed.
For about three hours, you worked in peace.
Then, you heard the tumbling and banging of Rocky's hamster ball coming up towards you. Grace must have woken up to get something before heading back to bed and Rocky took the opportunity to grab some supplies so he could continue working while Grace went back to sleep. This often happened, for both of you. Rocky didn't need to sleep as much, so he would spend the many hours that either Grace or you needed to sleep watching over you while working on something else.
The Eridians really were something else. Rocky could get so much done in the time he was awake.
You felt a knock on your chair, then another, and another, Rocky banging into you with panic evident.
You took off your headphones, grabbing Rocky's ball.
"Woah, woah! What's going on Rock?"
"Grace! Grace! Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad. Need help!"
"Why?" You questioned, frantically getting out of your chair and running towards Grace's bed. "What's going on? Use your words! I need to know what is happening to help!"
"Grace make noise in sleep. Grace temperature rise. Grace move in sleep, more, more! Rocky can't touch Grace. Grace sick? Grace dying!" Rocky zoomed ahead of you, terrified. He nearly made himself roll over in the ball, he was moving so fast.
You couldn't blame him. He had to watch twenty-three other Eridians die while he was supposed to be protecting him. Your breath quickened at the thought, desperate to soothe the alien, unfamiliar with human biology.
"Rocky! Slow down, I think Grace is alright."
Rocky slowed, allowing you to catch up, right at the moment you turned the corner to find Grace in his bed, twisting and turning in his sleep.
"Grace not die?"
"No Rocky, I think Grace is just having a nightmare."
"No understand word."
"I can't explain it to you right now, buddy, I need to see if Grace is alright."
"Understand. Help Grace then help Rocky."
You slowed your approach, not wanting to scare Grace awake. You could see his t-shirt, another science pun about the equation for finding force combined with Star Wars, soaked in the back with sweat. His hair was all over the place and his hands were gripping the blanket he had, as though it was the only thing keeping him tethered to the spacecraft, despite the gravity being turned on.
"Grace."
You saw his neck tense, as though he was going to shout out. Or perhaps like he was going to be tased.
"Grace!"
He was not responding to any of your vocal attempts to wake him, so you moved closer. You knew that it was possible for him to accidentally hurt you when he woke, even if that was the last thing he would ever want. Even though you knew he wouldn't mean it. So, you tried to think quickly. Wake up Grace without him hurting himself or you in his sleep or awakening.
You hovered your hand over his, still grasping the blanket. You smoothed the back of his hand over with your fingers, repeating the soothing motion. He still thrashed a bit, but his hands began to loosen its grip. You took the opportunity to thread your fingers with his, holding his hand. You brought your other hand to the back of his, again, soothing strokes up and down his arm back down to his hands.
Slowly, so slowly, he began to settle. His body relaxing and his breathing slowing. Shortly after, he awoke with a gasp, eyes darting around above him.
"Rocky!"
"Rocky is here. Rocky scared for Grace."
Grace closed his eyes, breathing out a sigh of relief. You felt his hand grip yours harder. You imagined that, after so long waking up to a friend watching over you, it was unnerving to no longer have them above you when you woke up.
"Hey, Grace."
Grace's eyes snapped open, looking into yours. He glanced down at your hands, still holding his, then back to you.
"What happened?"
"You were having a nightmare. You are in the Hail Mary. You slept for about three hours before Rocky came to get me. You are safe."
Grace blinked, nodded, and then looked up at Rocky's balconey above his head again.
"Ok."
You held his hand a moment longer, before letting go. You sat on the floor next to the bed, watching the floor.
It was quiet. Rocky seemed to naturally understand that something had happened that had shaken Grace and that time could be…not healing, but give room to something else. Connection.
"It was a memory."
You stayed quiet, but lifted your head to look at Grace, acknowledging him.
"My last time on Earth."
Grace was quiet again. His fingers instinctively tightening on the blanket again.
"Do you want to talk about it more?" You softly asked, taking in his behavior.
Grace took a deep breath and let it out. A tear slipped out, trailing down the side of his face. Your heart ached for this hurt, this pain that you couldn't understand, but were trying to. If there was anything you could do, it was to listen.
"I… I'm a coward." Grace sniffled, pausing. He looked at you. "I'm a coward and I was so scared. So scared. Heck, I'm still scared."
You looked down at your hands, clasped in between your knees. "Me too. Scared, I mean. And as for being a coward, I don't remember much from before waking up, but I know that you have done some very brave things since then."
Grace looked away at that. Squeezing his eyes shut.
"Yeah…Well…I don't know about that."
He threw an arm over his eyes.
"I told her no. I told Stratt that I couldn't do it. The other two science members were gone, there was no one else more qualified, and I couldn't do it."
He gathered himself before continuing.
"She told me… 'that this was her believing in me. Not betraying me." A shudder passed through Grace, his voice breaking on "betraying".
"They chased me out of the room. Her.. her goons. Chased me down. I almost made it to the chain link fence. I don't know what I would have done. It's not like I could have really gotten away, but I was in fight or flight and I had chosen flight, cause that's all I really ever choose, isn't it?" Grace's voice quickened as he spoke, the horror rising up in you simultaneously. "They tackled me to the ground, and injected me with a sedative. I remember smelling the dead grass, my glasses got knocked askew a bit, I could barely see. My last moment on Earth and all I could see was dead grass, the blue sky being covered, then shoes. Carl walked up. I was yelling that they were murdering me, can you believe it? They were killing me, and I wanted to live! I just wanted…Oh God."
Grace sobbed, and you quickly stood up as Grace scrambled out of the bed, knocking you back down on the ground, his arms around you. You just barely got an arm behind you, as you scooted back towards the wall, giving you the support to fully embrace Grace as he poured his fear out into the open.
Tears were beginning to form in your eyes, too. You really couldn't believe it. Grace had awoken before you and thus was gathering more memories before you. But this? This was a… nightmare. You had some feelings, choice words, and a certain gesture to give Stratt on the video monitor later, but right now, Grace needed you. You stroked his back with one hand, and squeezed him into you with the other. You wanted to pour all of your horror at his words and the care you felt for him into the hug.
Rocky rolled a bit closer, clacking his three fingers, shaking slightly side to side. You felt for Rocky too. His best friend was obviously upset and he couldn't touch him. He couldn't give him that comfort. Rocky rolled closer and then backed up, rolling out of the room.
You heard his ball clack around in the Hail Mary, but knew you couldn't get up from your position, nor did you want to. You moved your hand from his back to his head, practically petting his hair.
You stayed there for a while, letting Grace get all of it out. As his sobs subsided, his breathing evening out, he pulled a bit off of you.
"Sor-sorry, I know I probably got you all gross with my tears and-and stuff." He wiped at his face, opting to sit next to you, one leg straight out and the other with his knee bent.
"No sorry's needed. I… whatever you need."
He looked over at you, face red and splotchy, eyes tired.
"Thank you."
You lean your head down, looking up into his eyes, before clearly saying,"Of course. Anything you want. Anything you need, Grace."
A sad smile forms on his face. He reaches out slowly, giving you time to pull away, as if you hadn't actively reached for his hand earlier, before intertwining your fingers. He squeezes your hand, once, twice, and a final third time. You look up at him, scrunching your eyebrows, confused, but squeeze his hand back once. You swear you see grief flash in his eyes, a glimmer of tears welling up, but it quickly fades away.
Thump, thump, thump.
You both look to where Rocky has now entered the room. He stops in front of you both, holding something in two of his claws.
"I'm not still in a nightmare, am I?" Grace asks, a perplexed look towards Rocky.
"Nope."
Rocky lifts up one arm, grasping a small green and blue felt ball through his hamster ball. "Grace call this stress ball. Grace is stressed. Rocky give Grace stress ball."
Grace leans over, taking the small Earth ball in his hand not holding yours, and tosses it a few times in the air. "Thanks, Rocky. That's thoughtful of you."
"Rocky not done."
"I can see that, Rocky."
Rocky holds up a xenonite mass in one of his other arms. It looks like a weapon in his hands, like his "screen gun", but more blunt and larger.
"Rocky need word for protect Grace from bad Stratt with tool."
Grace and you look at each other sideways, before bursting out in small laughs. He wipes his face with the back of his hand, still holding the Earth ball. "Rocky, you… there's no need for that Rocky."
"Rocky no understand. Rocky protect."
"Rocky that is very… something of you, but really, all I need are you two. Here. With me now."
"Rocky understand," Rocky shifts side to side, dropping his weapon, almost nervous,"Rocky scared for Grace. For human friends. This happen during sleep many times, question?"
This time, you take over. "No, Rocky. This is called a nightmare. Nightmares are during sleep, you are correct. When we sleep, our brain is still active and we see events in our brain. They often aren't real, but sometimes…" You pause, looking at Grace. He nods at you, so you continue,"they are memories that are bad. Bad. Bad. It is a way for our brain to protect us, but it can also be very scary."
Rocky slumps a little, processing this human thing that he could never understand for himself. "Rocky still scared for human friends," Rocky stands taller as he says,"Rocky still watch. Good, good, good! Rocky watch for nightmares, Rocky get other human friend. Rocky wait for human friend to wake up to help."
You reach a hand out to Rocky, patting his ball a few times before keeping your hand there. Grace gives you a sideways look, before reaching out too, holding the other side of Rocky's ball. He rolls a bit closer, so you can all hug each other. Grace releases your hand, shifting to actually pull you in closer.
"Rocky like all hug."
"It's called a group hug, Rock."
"Rocky like group hug."
You all rest there for a minute, before settling back. You grab at Grace's hand again as you begin to separate, and he happily allows you.
"Grace, you still need to sleep. Would you…would you like me to stay?" You quietly offer.
You feel a tug on your hand, before Grace gets to his feet, pulling you up with him.
"I'd like that very much."
Rocky begins to move toward his sleeping perch, getting into watching position.
You let Grace get into his pod, before climbing in next to him. You both face each other, on your sides, with your joined hands in between you. Normally, you would be very nervous, as you can imagine Grace would be, to sleep in the same bed as another human that you had known for a fairly short amount of time. Yet, Rocky's watching you sleep seemed to lessen that feeling, and after Grace's nightmare, you both knew that comfort was more of a priority than social rules.
"Good night."
"Good night, Grace."
Grace glances up, "Good night Rocky."
"Sleep humans. Rocky watch both sleep. Rocky protect."
Grace rolls his eyes, giving you a smile. You smile back. In no time at all, you both fall asleep, breathing slowing in time and hands together as your guardian rock alien watches over you.
summary: after weeks of trying you can’t take the lies anymore—only to learn the truth was bigger than both you and your boyfriend, and you don’t know if love is enough to survive it
warnings: 18+ smut, p in v, graphic description of sex, gentle smut, port with plot, major hurt comfort, crying, feeling unloved, major deceit/lies, soft! ryland, but still angst, there is a happy ending, this is a long one so get ready
You lugged your bag down the steep stairwell, no longer caring if the wheels clattered against each step as you made your descent. The sound was sharp as it echoed, ricocheting up the narrow walls as it almost beckoned you to turn back.
It didn’t matter anyway. He wasn't there to hear it.
You felt as though this moment should have been more dramatic, some semblance of finality in it. You never expected it to feel so dull. It sat heavy on your stomach, churning deep inside with the same feeling that had been stuck there for the past few weeks.
It was not a clean break, wrapped up with a satisfying conclusion. It was slow. It eroded quietly at something that you once believed was unbreakably solid.
God, you almost wished it were more sudden than this.
You’d been circling this for a while now, flipping and mulling it over in your mind as it gnawed slowly. You’d give it time, given him time. That and every excuse you could possibly feed yourself, stretching them all thin until they barely held any comfort at all.
He’s tired.
Work is stressful.
It’s just a phase.
But it was only so long that you could look at something fraying so obviously in front of you and turn a blind eye to the truth.
By the time you reached the bottom of the stairs, your grip on the handle had tightened to the point your fingers ached. You paused in the dim hallway, breath catching. It wasn’t because of the suitcase, but the weight of everything you were leaving just four floors up.
The heavy door. The flat.
Him.
You stopped your train of thought before your heart led you straight back upstairs, stepping out into the night. The street was quiet, wrapping you in cold darkness immediately. It was late, no sounds of traffic or voices, only the distant sound of the city and the hollow echo of your own footsteps as you crossed toward your car.
You remembered the first time you’d stood on this exact stretch of pavement, keys in hand, both of you grinning like idiots.
Your salary, paired with his teacher’s one, had been just enough to make it work—barely, at times—but it had felt like a win at the time. A one-bedroom with an actual kitchen, a living room that wasn’t just a glorified corridor, and that tiny little balcony that had sealed it for him immediately.
He’d stepped out onto it that first day.
“It’s perfect,” he said, turning back to you with boyish excitement. “Do you know what we could grow out here?”
You hadn’t, at least not then, but it was impossible not to learn when living with a science teacher.
Every morning after felt easy. He’d be up before you sometimes, or just after, padding out onto the balcony with a cup of coffee in one hand, already half-focused on the plants before he’d even taken a sip.
You’d stand just inside the glass doors, your own mug warming your hands, watching him.
He’d crouch, careful with his makeshift garden. Fingers brushing over their leaves. He always treated them with such care. Checking the soil, murmuring little observations under his breath.
And then he’d look up at you.
“This one’s doing really well,” he said, pointing, already halfway into it. “I’m going to have to repot it soon—yeah, definitely. It’s starting to outgrow its house. If I leave it the roots’ll get compacted and then it’s just a whole thing—nutrient uptake drops, water retention—should probably move it before it gets upset.”
You never understood half of it, but you loved the way he said it. Loved the way his whole face lit up, voice picking up the pace. He always got completely absorbed with his subject, even something so small and living and hopeful.
Like he used to be with you.
You reached your car now, dragging your case the last few feet, catching some of the uneven pavement before you lifted it into the back. It landed with a dull thud, making this feel even more final.
The back of your eyes began to sting as you tried to swallow.
You glanced back at your building for one last time as you slammed the door shut. Turning and wrapping your arms around yourself to give you some semblance of comfort.
He always said that it was his job to take care of you. To make sure you were okay, to look after you.
You’d believed him.
Just another lie.
You think you knew from the beginning. The late evenings, distracted conversations. Him nodding along to things you said without really hearing them. You’d been kind to him, told yourself it was normal. People get busy, life gets in the way.
But then it began to stretch.
He’d start coming home later. And when he was home, he was miles away. You’d sit on the sofa together, something half-watched on the TV, and you’d feel it. Physically, he was next to you, but his attention was fractured; trying to be present but couldn’t quite manage it.
You tried to ignore it. Hell—you wanted nothing more than to ignore it. But you weren’t stupid.
“I’ve got an after-school thing.”
“I might be running late.”
You’d nodded, because what else were you supposed to do?
But something about it had sat wrong.
That was until you’d picked up your phone, dialled the school, and asked casually if you could leave a message for him. But the voice on the other end told you something you already knew: that the building had been locked up hours ago.
You fucking knew it.
You closed your eyes, inhaling slowly, trying to steady the tightness in your chest that had been building all day.
You still loved him.
You loved him, and you missed him.
Missed the way he used to look at you, the way he used to reach for you without thinking. Missed the thoughtless closeness that had once been the foundation of everything.
This was not supposed to end with you standing next to your car, years of your life packed away in the back, sneaking away in the middle of the night.
You were just about to open the door when you heard a noise.
First it was distant, but fast approaching, amplified in the empty night air. It grew louder fast, then closer, your stomach dropping as your mind scrambled to keep up.
No.
No, no, no.
You turned your head just enough to see it. A small white light cutting through the dark at the end of the road.
His bike.
Your heart leapt, slamming against your ribs as your fingers fumbled uselessly with your keys. They slipped, catching awkwardly between your hands as you tried to press the small button.
Not now.
Please, not now.
This was the whole point—you hadn’t waited for him, hadn’t given yourself the chance to hesitate, because you knew if you saw him, if he looked at you the way he used to, if he said your name...
You wouldn’t go.
Your breath came shallow as you tried again, hands shaking now. Behind you, the bike slowed.
“Hey!”
You squeezed your eyes shut, trying to rewind the last thirty seconds so you could just leave.
He pulled up. You heard the shift of movement as he dismounted, the soft scuff of his shoes against the pavement.
“Hey—” he called again, like nothing in the world was wrong. “You off somewhere?”
You finally unlocked the car, the sound that seemed to echo far too loudly in the street.
“If you needed me to pick something up you should’ve just asked,” he went on, voice warm, slightly breathless from his journey home.
You kept your head down, unable to look at him.
You heard the shift of his helmet being pulled off, the shake of it as he adjusted his hair, the soft clatter as he leaned the bike carefully against the side of your car.
God. You didn’t want to do this.
You didn’t want to stand here and say the words out loud. You didn’t want to hear him explain or watch him try to fix something that had already slipped too far through your hands. You didn’t want to beg him to tell you what you already knew.
That he’d lost interest.
Or something worse.
“Move, Ry,” you sighed, hand already on the door as you tried to pull it open.
The cold air bit at your skin sharply, but you barely felt it. He made no effort to move. He did the complete opposite, stepping in front of the car, cutting you off entirely, clearly not realising you were trying to do.
“Hey, are you alright?” he asked, his brows pulling together as he took a proper look at you. “It’s freezing out here.”
You almost laughed.
You hadn’t even brought a jumper. Every single one you owned was his.
Soft, worn cotton that still smelled faintly like him, no matter how many times you washed them. You’d stood in front of the drawer earlier, fingers curled around the fabric. You didn’t know if your heart could bear taking them.
So you’d left them behind, left everything back there.
“Move,” you tried again, stronger this time, your voice shaking despite your best efforts as you stepped forward, attempting to push past him. “Please, I—I need you to move.”
He shifted slightly, just enough to stay in front of you, confusion flickering across his face as your words finally began to register properly.
Something wasn’t right; he could see it now.
“Hey—wait—”
He dipped slightly, crouching just enough to catch your face as you tried to turn away, his head tilting, searching for some sign to tell him what was going through your head.
It was impossible not to see the red rims of your eyes, your breath coming in unevenly despite how still you were trying to hold yourself.
His expression shifted.
Please, don’t do this.
“…what’s wrong?”
His hands came up without thinking, settling gently on your shoulders like they always did when he was trying to ground you. You shrugged them off, stepping back like his touch burned.
He would never expect you to react that way to him.
His hands hovered in the air for a second before dropping back down, his fingers flexing, unsure at his sides.
You’d always lean into him.
Always.
“You’re worrying me, sweetheart,” he tried again, shifting his weight. “C’mon—let’s just go upstairs, yeah? We can talk about whatever this is inside. It’s not safe to be out here this late—”
You wanted to, so badly.
You wanted to go upstairs, let him pull you into the warmth of your home, make you tea, talk you through it in that rambling way of his until everything felt manageable again.
You wanted to look into his eyes and believe him.
But for both of your sakes, you couldn’t let that happen.
You knew the second you stepped back into your shared space, softening even a little, it would be over for you. You’d fold. You’d stay. You’d convince yourself it wasn’t as bad as it felt.
And you couldn’t do that again. You owed yourself more than that.
“I’m not going upstairs with you,” you said, lifting your head finally, forcing yourself to meet his eyes.
Those stupid, pleading blue eyes that had always undone you without effort.
“I’m leaving, Ry,” you continued, your voice breaking. “I—I can’t do this anymore.”
Your words didn’t properly land, hovering somewhere between the two of you. Words he never imagined he would hear.
His mouth parted like he was about to say something before stopping himself, his eyes searching your face like he was trying to find something that made sense.
Much like you had, for weeks at this point.
“What—” he started, then stopped, swallowing hard. “Why?”
He took a step closer, cautious now he realised how serious you were.
“C’mon,” he said, voice tighter, something creeping into it, panic, maybe, or confusion. “You’re not making any sense. Let’s just—let’s just go inside, okay? We can figure this out—”
“There is nothing to figure out.”
You saw the way he stilled, the way his shoulders tensed, the way his expression flickered again.
Hurt this time, unmistakable.
“Seriously,” you added, your hands trembling as you gestured weakly toward the side, toward the space you needed him to move from. “My mind’s made up, so if you can—”
Your voice wavered and he caught it.
Of course he fucking did.
It was like a switch flipped behind his eyes, the moment your words faltered. That ever-so-small crack in your composure was enough to make him hope that this was salvageable. He sharpened immediately, though his confusion remained, but it shifted into something more urgent.
“Hey—no, wait—” he said quickly, stepping forward again. “Don’t—don’t do that.”
His voice softened on the last part, trying to steady you.
You shook your head immediately, stepping back again, your heel catching slightly against the curb as you tried to keep distance between you.
“Just—please,” you said, breath uneven now. “Just move, Ry, I don’t—I don’t want to do this like this, I just—”
“Like what?” his words spilt out. “What are you talking about?”
He ran a hand through his hair, pushing it back messily. His eyes kept shifting between your face and the car, like he was trying to piece something together and kept coming up short.
“You’re leaving?” he said again, like saying it slower might make it make sense. “You’re—why would you—what happened?”
What happened?
Like he had the nerve to even ask.
A laugh broke out of you, brittle and wrong.
“What happened?” you echoed, your head shaking “Ryland—are you serious?”
He winced, the missing nickname hitting him.
“I—yeah, I—what do you mean?” he stammered, genuinely lost. “You were fine this morning, I—”
“That’s exactly it,” you cut in. “I’m always fine, right? Everything’s always fine because I don’t say anything and you don’t ask and we just—carry on like nothing’s wrong.”
“Something is wrong,” he said, immediately agreeing, more careful now. “Clearly something is—just tell me what it is.”
Just tell him what it is so he can fix it.
You shook your head again, your hands coming up as you could physically push the words back down.
“No, I—I can’t—” you started, your breath hitching as it all caught up with you. “I can’t keep pretending like this is—like this is normal, like this is what it’s supposed to feel like—”
“What isn’t normal?” he pressed, trying to follow. “You have to tell me, I can’t—”
“You’re never here anymore!” you burst out, the words breaking loose before you could stop them.
The silence that followed was painful. The confusion on his face faltered as it softened into something sadder, almost edged with apology, even if he didn’t fully understand why.
“What?”
“You’re just—” you gestured helplessly, your hands shaking. “You’re gone, Ry. You’re here, but you’re not here, and I—I don’t even know when that happened, I don’t know when I stopped being part of your life in a way that actually matters—”
“That’s not—”
“You don’t talk to me anymore,” you pushed on messily. “You don’t look at me properly, you don’t—you don’t see me, and I’ve been standing there just—waiting for you to come back to me and you just—”
“I am here,” he said desperately. “I’m right here, I—”
“No, you’re not.”
Not in the way he used to be.
He opened his mouth, trying to figure out how to respond to what was so obvious.
You could see it, see him trying, like he always did. Reaching for something to fix it, to explain, to make it all make sense again. He’d always been good at solving problems. But this felt like something that had slipped too far through his hands to put back together.
This had been breaking for a long time.
“I’ve just been busy,” he said finally, grabbing the first thing that made sense. “That’s all it is. It’s—it’s work, it’s been—”
“Busy?” you repeated, your voice cracking again. “You’ve been lying.”
His whole body went still, like you’d pulled something tight inside him.
You knew you were right.
“I—no, I haven’t—” he said too quickly.
There it was again.
That instinctive, immediate reach for something untrue, so fast it barely felt like he’d thought about it. You’d let yourself hope that he might fix it. That he might finally say something real enough to pull you back.
But that just cemented it.
He was sticking with the bullshit.
“You told me you were at the school,” you gritted out, tears finally slipping free despite how hard you’d been holding them back. “You told me you were working late, and I—I called, Ry. I called them.”
His face fell.
“They said the building was locked,” you went on, your voice breaking. “Hours ago.”
“Okay—okay, wait—” he said quickly, hands coming up again, palms out like he was trying to slow everything down. “There’s—there’s a simple explanation for that, I just—”
“What?” you asked. “What explanation?”
What could he possibly say?
“I was—I was there,” he said, nodding like he was trying to convince both of you. “I just—I left, like, right before you called, they must’ve just—missed me, or—”
“Ryland,” you pleaded for him to stop.
He tried to press on.
“I—stopped at the store,” he added, scrambling now. “On the way back, and I—lost track of time, that’s all, I just—”
You stared at him, and something in your expression must have told him because he stopped. The words fell apart mid-sentence, realising how poorly he was doing.
Even he wouldn’t believe a word coming out of his mouth. And he knew you weren’t stupid.
“You’re a terrible liar,” you said quietly. It wasn’t even cruel, just a plain observation that he couldn’t even be angry about.
He swallowed hard, his eyes flicking away from yours for the first time since he’d gotten there.
“I’m not—”
“You are,” you said. “You always have been.”
It was true. Last year he’d tried to convince you he hadn’t planned anything for your birthday, doing a terrible job of acting casual while you narrowed your eyes at him. He’d tripped over every word, couldn’t quite meet your gaze, and you’d laughed because it was so obvious, so him.
Now you weren’t even sure he’d remember the date without being reminded.
The silence stretched again as your mind went somewhere you had been skirting around for weeks. You didn’t want to believe it, but you had to be sure, even if you broke your own heart in the process.
“Is there—“ you began, trying to swallow the taste of the question back down. “Is there someone else?”
Your voice broke on the last syllable, his head snapping up.
“What?” his response was immediate, like he was unable to comprehend you asking such a question.
“Because I don’t understand what else it could be,” you went on, tears falling freely now, your chest heaving with it. “You’re gone all the time, you won’t tell me where you are, you barely touch me anymore, and I—I just need to know if I’m—if I’m just—”
“Hey—no—no, no, no,” he cut in quickly. He couldn’t stop himself when you looked like this. “Sweetheart, no—how could you even—no, I would never—”
He moved without hesitation, closing the space between you, one hand catching your arm just to steady you before the other came up, hovering for a split second at your cheek like he wasn’t sure he had the right.
His fingers were warm against your skin, his thumb brushing just beneath your eye as if he could physically stop the tears.
“I would never do that,” he said urgently. “Not to you, not—no, that’s not—don’t—don’t think that, okay? Please don’t think that.”
His words were so soft, but you were already splintering, and the contrast was too much to bear. Whatever you’d been holding together, whatever thin thread of control you’d been clinging to, snapped completely.
A sob tore out of you before you could stop it, your hands coming up to cover your face as your shoulders shook, the sound raw and helpless and completely out of your control.
“Hey—hey—” he panicked now. “Okay—it’s okay, I’ve got you—”
He pulled you into him, unable to stop himself, arms wrapping around you properly this time.
He couldn’t lose you like this.
You didn’t fight him, already lost in his familiar embrace. Your hands clutched at his jacket instead, fingers twisting into the fabric as you cried into him, the sound muffled against his chest.
“I’m sorry,” he was saying, over and over, the words tumbling out. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t—I didn’t realise it was—I didn’t know you were—”
You shook your head against him, your voice breaking apart between breaths.
“You weren’t there,” you managed, the words barely coherent. “You—you weren’t there and I—I didn’t know how to—how to fix it on my own and I—”
“I know, I know,” he said, his hand coming up to the back of your head, holding you there gently, his fingers brushing as he tried to calm you down. “That’s on me, okay? That’s—that’s my fault, I should’ve—”
His voice caught as the guilt started to settle.
How could he have let it get this bad?
Was he that blind?
“I’m here,” he said instead. “I’m here now, okay? I’m right here.”
You cried harder at that. The statement offering you little comfort. He had been here physically, albeit in fragmented pieces, but he wasn’t with you. It was outlined in every late-night and half-finished conversation.
Your knuckles started to ache as you squeezed his jacket tighter, feeling the damp of your own tears leaving small marks on his lapel. You could feel the erratic rise and fall of his own breathing where your cheek was anchored into his chest, far from his usual steadiness. Instead, it was racing.
Good.
It was a bitter thought, but you couldn’t help it. It felt good to have him feel just a fraction of what you were going through. The feeling didn’t last long; you were too tired. Far too worn to sustain any malice right now.
You let yourself take a deep breath in, trying to steady your breathing. The adrenaline diffusing into exhaustion. The fog in your head cleared as you came back into yourself, making the decision before you even pulled away, shaking your head softly against him.
“I think—“ you started, your voice muffled by his shirt. “Maybe it’s better if we just… spend tonight apart.”
His whole body went rigid beneath you. Every muscle locked up at once as you barely finished your statement.
“What?” he sputtered. His face had gone pale beneath the streetlight. “No,” he said again, already shaking his head. “No, absolutely not. No.”
“Ry—”
“No.” He swallowed hard, now blinking fast, trying and failing to get hold of himself. “No, I’m not—I’m not letting you just go somewhere alone when you’re this upset, okay? I’m not doing that.”
We don’t do that.
The urgency of it made your chest tighten all over again. He looked wrecked now, breathing still uneven, eyes darting over your face.
“I’m not asking for permission,” you said weakly; even to your own ears there was no strength in it. “I just… I can’t do this tonight. I can’t stand here and—”
“No, no, you can’t—” He was speaking too fast now, his brain sprinting ahead of his mouth. “Okay, yes, obviously, tonight is—bad, I get that, I do, but you can’t leave like this. You just can’t. Not—not when you think—” He broke off, exhaled sharply through his nose. “Not when you think that’s what’s happening.”
You looked away from him, jaw trembling.
“I don’t have it in me to argue with you.”
“Then don’t,” he said, almost pleading now. “Just—just let me try.”
Your throat tightened.
His voice dropped, but no less desperate. “Please,” he said, almost painfully with his sincerity. “Please just come upstairs with me.”
You didn’t answer.
You wanted to. To fold into the shape of him and let him lead you upstairs, but you felt completely wrung out. Heavy with grief and the cold and the too many sleepless nights spent staring at the ceiling when he was right there next to you.
“I’ll tell you everything,” he said. “Okay? I will. I promise, I know I’ve been weird, and I know I’ve been gone, and I know this looks terrible—horrific, actually, in retrospect, which is my fault—but it’s not what you think it is. It’s not. You have to—you have to believe me on that part.”
His hands had slid down to your elbows now, holding lightly. His thumb kept twitching against your sleeve.
“I’ll explain all of it,” he said more firmly. “I’ll tell you everything. Just… please don’t walk away from me tonight. Please.”
You searched his face, the open panic there. The fear. His mouth was parted slightly, ready to keep pleading if you needed him to. His eyes were frantic, horribly earnest.
He looked nothing like a man who had stopped caring. He looked like a man who had just realised what his silence had cost him.
The fight was draining out of you, leaving a dangerous flicker of hope you did not trust. Your face felt cold from the night and hot from crying. Your chest hurt. Everything hurt.
You gave the smallest nod, one that was barely there. One which he latched onto instantly. His whole expression changed with almost comical speed, relief flashing across his face so fast and so naked it might have been laughable in any other moment.
“Yeah?” he said, breathless. “Yeah?”
You managed another tiny nod.
You could let him try.
He perked up at once, scrambling to gather himself.
“Yeah, okay,” he said. “Yeah, alright. Come on. Come on, let’s just—okay.”
He was moving before he’d even finished speaking. He shrugged off his coat immediately, that caretaking part of him kicking in with no thought at all, and stepped forward to drape it around your shoulders before you could protest. It was still warm from him.
“You’re freezing,” he muttered, already fussing with the collar to pull it closer around you. “God, why didn’t you—no, stupid question, forget I asked.”
Gently but decisively, he took your keys from your unresisting hand. You frowned faintly, too wrung out to stop him, watching through blurred vision as he glanced at you once before he clicked the button.
The car locked with a sharp little chirp. He winced, caught out.
“I’m sorry,” he said immediately, not sounding sorry in the sense that he regretted it, only sorry that you’d noticed the calculation. “That was—yes, I know. But you were about to leave me in a parking spot, so I think I get one tactical decision.”
Despite everything, despite the ache in your throat and the tears still wet on your cheeks, the line was so desperately, transparently him that something in your expression must have shifted.
“I’m not locking you in,” he said more gently. “I’m just… I need to get you upstairs before you bolt or decide I’m terrible enough to justify vehicular manslaughter. One crisis at a time.”
You chuckled against your better judgment.
Damn him.
“C’mon,” he said quietly, his hand finding yours. And when you didn’t resist, he tightened his hold just a fraction.
At the front door, he let go of your hand only long enough to fumble the key into the lock, missing the first time because his hands were still shaking. He huffed under his breath, corrected, and pushed the door open before immediately turning back to you.
“Go sit down,” he told you. “I’ll make tea, alright?”
You didn’t argue, letting him guide you inside, his hand still hovering at your back. The flat felt wrong now, with you going back on the promise not to return here tonight.
You moved toward the sofa, lowering yourself down slowly, his jacket still wrapped around you. Behind you, you heard him move into the kitchen. Cupboards opening, shutting. The scrape of something being moved out of the way. The clatter of the kettle being filled, water rushing.
He was nervous; you could hear it in everything he did.
Your hands curled into your lap, fingers picking absently at the skin beside your nail, tugging at it until it stung. You pressed your thumb harder against it, grounding yourself in the sharp pain. You stared at nothing, eyes unfocused, listening to the soft click of the kettle switching on. The sound filled the space, just like old evenings.
He reappeared with two mugs in his hand, steam curling from both of them, glasses slightly fogged,
“Sorry,” he started automatically, stepping into the living room. “I couldn’t find your mug, I swear it was—”
You looked up. His words faltered mid-sentence, his eyes drifting from the mugs in his hands to your face.
“Oh,” he said softly.
You were really serious.
His voice was quiet and your gaze dropped immediately, heat creeping up your neck, embarrassment uncomfortable in your chest. You stared down at your hands instead, deciding they were far more bearable to look at.
He shook his head quickly, needing to undo the moment as fast as possible.
“Hey—no, look—it’s fine,” he said, a little too gentle. “It’s—I’m gonna fix it, alright? I’m gonna make it fine.”
You really hoped so.
He crouched slightly as he reached you, setting one of the mugs down on the coffee table before offering the other to you. You took it without looking up, the warmth seeping into your palms.
Then he sat opposite, on the edge of the table. Your knees were almost touching. He rested his elbows on his thighs, one hand still loosely wrapped around his own mug, the other running briefly through his hair again before dropping back down.
Here goes nothing.
“Okay,” he said finally. “So.”
You lifted your eyes to him slowly, bracing yourself.
“I don’t… really work as a teacher anymore.”
What?
I mean, you knew it wasn’t his first profession, that had been ripped away from him. He told you after a few weeks of dating, the past still sat heavy on his shoulders. But he took a shine to his kids, was protective of them, even found himself finding joy in the small places the classroom offered.
“…you got fired?”
It was the only thing you could deduce.
“No—no, God, no,” he said, startled. “I’m not that terrible.”
You didn’t laugh. He swallowed, nodding once to himself like he’d expected that.
“Right. Yeah,” he muttered, shaking his head. He set his mug down, both hands coming together loosely between his knees.
“What I’m about to tell you—” He faltered, dragging a hand over his mouth. “It’s not something I’m meant to say. Not to anyone. So I need you to trust me, okay? Just—trust me for a minute.”
Your throat felt too tight to speak, but you nodded.
“Do you know what the Petrova line is?”
You tilted your head, the question so abrupt it threw you slightly.
“…yeah,” you said slowly. “You’ve—you’ve talked about it before.”
He nodded in relief.
“Yeah, yeah, of course I have,” he said, more to himself than to you, like he was trying to reassure himself that there was a logical entry point here. “Right. Good. That’s good.”
How could he not remember?
He was fascinated by it, and mildly concerned. Researching articles and sharing them with you in the evening, or even messaging them to you while you were at work.
Maybe you weren’t a priority anymore.
He kept going.
“So—okay—the Petrova line,” he said, slipping unconsciously into explanation mode. “Those dots, right? The… the dimming events on the sun? They’re not just random fluctuations. They’re consistent.”
He glanced at you, checking you were following. You nodded faintly.
“They’re… eating it,” he said, the words sounding strange even as he said them. “Not—not like, metaphorically. Literally. Something is consuming solar radiation at the surface level and absorbing it or… something.”
“…huh?”
“I know,” he held up a hand, already anticipating the reaction. “I know how that sounds, okay? I do. But it’s—it’s measurable. The data’s there, it’s been there, we—I just didn’t realise how serious it was.”
His voice was picking up now, like he was explaining something to his class.
“It’s spreading,” he continued. “Exponentially. And if it keeps going at the rate it is, it—it’s not just a solar anomaly, it’s a—it’s a problem. A big one.”
Your fingers tightened around the mug in your hands.
“…Ryland,” you said quietly. “What are you talking about?”
How did this relate to anything?
He exhaled, dragging a hand down his face before looking back at you.
“I got… approached,” he said, choosing his words more carefully. “At work. In the school car park.”
Your stomach dropped.
“Approached?”
“Yeah,” he said with a small, humourless breath. “Like—cornered, basically. There were people. Government people. I didn’t—I didn’t know that at the time, obviously, I just thought—” He shook his head. “They knew about an article I wrote years ago. About life not necessarily requiring water to evolve, you remember?”
Like he had to ask.
You looked at him to continue.
“I tried to say no,” he added defensively. “I did. I told them I was a teacher, that I wasn’t—I wasn’t the right person, that they should find someone else, but they—”
Something tightened in his expression.
“They didn’t really give me a choice.”
The room felt smaller.
“They think these things—whatever they are—they’re alive,” he went on. “And they can survive on the surface of the sun.”
Your eyes widened as you fully registered his words.
But… how is that possible?
You didn’t have a PHD in space science or damn astrophysics, but this sounded insane, even to you.
“And because I have a background in molecular biology and I’ve written about organisms that can survive extreme environments and I am, apparently, just obscure enough to be useful without being politically complicated…” He let out a breathless exhale. “They… recruited me.”
Recruited him.
It was almost unbelievable. He was brilliant—yes—but your cardigan-wearing, plant-watering, middle-school-teaching boyfriend had somehow been snapped up by the government to investigate why the sun is basically dying?
He was right, it did sound insane.
“…you’re serious?” you said, though it didn’t sound like a question.
He held your gaze.
“I know how it sounds,” he said quietly. “I do. I know it sounds insane.”
He got that right.
“…you’re saying…” You started, your voice unsteady. “You’ve been—what? Working with the government?”
He nodded once. And you realised, with a sinking, dizzying feeling in your chest.
He wasn’t lying.
As much as you hated to admit it, the information sank through your chest. You wanted to tear it apart, find a seam and rip, pulling until you could shred it into something easier to understand.
But it made sense.
The late nights shrouded in secrecy, all of the distractions. He was stretched thin about something he clearly couldn’t talk about. He’d come home wired, your brain jumping to the worst possible conclusion, but his mind was still buzzing with something far greater than the two of you.
There was detail in his explanation—so much detail, and it was fast. The intricacies of his story felt unpolished and unrehearsed, just like life was. His lies were never this big; this felt too real to be something he’d constructed just to avoid telling you he didn’t love you anymore. He would never be that cruel.
It was true, but you didn’t want to think about what that meant for you both.
Your stomach twisted as you processed, not knowing whether to be angry or terrified. Your grip tightened around the mug as your pulse started to make itself known again, surging back with fresh force.
“You—“ you began. “Why didn’t you talk to me?”
You had an inkling as to why. This was a huge secret, but he still allowed you to think the worst, not noticing how fractured your relationship was becoming.
“Hey—no, I wanted to,” he told you quickly, slightly relieved you were humouring him. “I tried to tell you. Like—multiple times, actually, I just—”
He broke off, dragging a hand through his hair.
“There were NDAs,” he said, the words tight. “Not the kind you sign for, like, a new textbook publisher or whatever, I mean actual—legal, government-level—if I say the wrong thing to the wrong person I could—”
He cut himself off again, jaw tightening.
“They’re… not people you mess around with,” he finished. “They’re the real deal.”
Who the hell has your boyfriend even been talking to?
“These people?” you echoed, incredulous. “Ryland, how do you even know these people are legit?”
“They are,” he said immediately. “They just—are.”
“That’s not an answer.”
“I know, I know,” he said, frustrated with himself now. “I just—I can’t give you, like, credentials or a LinkedIn profile or—I don’t know—”
Despite everything, the corner of your mouth twitched faintly.
“But they’re real. I promise you they’re real.”
You focused on him through the haze of adrenaline, allowing the noise in your head to go quiet. Mulling his words over and over as he awaited your response.
It was your turn to look at him now, the man you loved sitting opposite. And if you were being completely honest, he looked wrecked.
The exhaustion clung to him. There were faint shadows under his eyes that were far darker than they should have been. His hair had grown slightly longer than usual. It fell messily over his forehead, half pushed back and unkempt. His hands were itching at his knees, unable to stay still. Fingers flexing and twitching, wired with adrenaline.
He was waiting for you. Waiting for you to say something.
Tell him you believe him.
But in doing so, you’d be admitting that he hadn’t just drifted away from you, he’d been taken to somewhere you couldn’t follow.
Your throat burned as your emotions scattered.
He could have told you something—a small thing. Something to stop you from unravelling the way you had, enough to stop you from standing outside with a packed suitcase, ready to leave everything behind.
You parted your lips as you tried to find a question to ask, a hundred things you could demand of him right now. From the look on his face, he would do them all.
What mattered most right now? What did you need to hear from him first?
There was only one thing that circled in your mind, the thing that kept you up at night. The only thing that made this ache so sore.
Your voice was fragile as you posed the question.
“…you didn’t just… get bored with me then?”
Ryland looked at you, completely devastated.
How could you ask him that?
“No.” It was his most immediate response that night. “Absolutely not.”
He leaned forward, needing you to hear his words more clearly than ever.
“That was never—never what this was,” his voice was firm. His chest ached at how fragile you sounded, ached even harder that you had to pose the question.
He could hardly bear to imagine what must have been going through your head these past weeks.
“You really thought I—“ he stopped to align the words right. “You really thought I could stop loving you? Just like that?”
The thought sounded unfathomable to him.
You fell silent, your actions from tonight speaking for themselves.
You had. He had pushed you to the point where you had.
He exhaled as your gaze dropped to the mug in your lap; you felt a sense of shame, which he saw immediately.
“Hey—this is on me,” he quietly told you, shifting forward. “This is completely on me, alright?”
Before you could react, he reached forward and gently took the mug from your hands. His fingers brushed yours without him meaning to, and you found yourself almost itching for them again. He set it down beside his own on the table, deciding to join you on the couch.
“I feel so stupid—” you started.
“Hey—no,” he cut in immediately, his hand finding yours where it rested in your lap. “No. You’re not stupid.”
Far from it in his mind. You were the only person who was, quite frankly, alarmingly smarter than him on most days.
His thumb brushed over your knuckles, feather light as they moved.
“If anything, you’re underreacting,” he attempted with humour. “Honestly, I’m impressed you didn’t throw something at my head sooner.”
A weak, breathy sound left you. You definitely thought about it.
“I got in over my head,” he admitted. “And I handled it badly. You deserved better than that.”
His hand tightened around yours.
“A lot better.”
You could feel it in the way he said it, the weight he’d been carrying, the guilt sitting heavy in his chest. This was a conversation that should have happened weeks ago.
“I should’ve trusted you with it,” he went on. “I should’ve—I don’t know.”
His other hand came up then, tentative, brushing lightly along your arm before settling at your elbow.
“I’m sorry,” he said, softer now. “I’m so, so sorry.”
Your throat tightened again. He shifted, body angling toward yours fully now, closing the space without overwhelming you. His hand lifted slowly—giving you time to pull away if you needed to—but when you didn’t, his fingers came to your face, warm against your cheek.
“Hey…” he murmured. His thumb brushed lightly along your jaw, coaxing. “Look at me.”
Your eyes met his, wide and a little glassy. And the way he looked at you.
God.
The love he’d been too wrapped up to show properly for weeks was pouring out of him completely now. Attention back on track to where it should have been all this time.
“I love you,” it was a statement, the honest truth behind all of this. “Do you believe me?”
You had to.
You paused before nodding softly, still unable to meet his eyes. Your pause was far too long for him, showing him just how far this had fractured. His had been immediate. You had never been hesitant with him before, not when it was this.
He nodded, accepting what he had hoped wouldn’t happen. It was a small dip of his head, careful not to disturb you too much.
“Okay,” he sighed, defeated.
It wasn’t the okay you wanted. Far from reassurance and steeped in uncertainty. It was an acceptance; it almost sounded like a goodbye. Your fingers tightened slightly in his hand, but he misread it. From where you sat opposite him, all he felt was distance.
He swallowed, his thumb slowing against your knuckles.
Space. That was what you needed.
And if that was what you needed, then he would, of course, oblige. Even if it ate at his stomach from the inside out. If he’d hurt you this much, if he’d made you doubt something as fundamental as this, then the least he could do now was not crowd you. Not make it worse.
Even if it meant walking away when every part of him was screaming not to.
“Alright.”
Your brows pulled together faintly, but before you could speak, his hand slipped from yours. The absence of it was immediate. He pushed himself up from the couch, movements controlled, and straightened slightly, like putting physical distance between you might somehow make this easier.
“Hey—”
He gave a small, almost apologetic shake of his head.
“It’s alright,” he said quickly. “I can—I can come back tomorrow. If you want.”
“Huh?”
“You want space,” he added, choosing each word so it wouldn’t hurt you more. “Which—yeah. I mean, that’s fair. Completely fair.”
“Ryland—”
“I’ll just—” His hand dipped into his pocket, pulling out your car keys—the ones he’d taken earlier—and he stepped toward the table. The small clink as he set them down beside the mugs felt loud.
“You can leave if you want,” he said, glancing at them briefly before looking anywhere but directly at you. “Or stay here. Either’s fine. I’ll, um—”
He faltered.
“I’ll give you some space.”
Your stomach dropped. Suddenly, you could see the way he was reading this, the way he’d twisted your silence into something it wasn’t. You watched it hit him all over again, turning awkwardly as he made space to depart and all you could feel was panic once again.
No—
It flooded through your chest, hollow and twisting as you watched the man you love walk away from you once again. You only let him take a couple of steps.
“Ry—no, wait—”
You were moving before you even fully registered it, the room tilting for a second as your hand reached out. Your fingers caught the sleeve of his shirt, gripping it just enough to stop him. He turned back to you slowly. You swallowed, your grip tightening slightly on his sleeve, anchoring him there.
“Don’t—,” you said, your voice catching despite your best efforts. “I—I want you to stay.”
Something flickered across his face.
“Are you sure?”
You nodded your head quickly, stepping closer without thinking, your other hand coming up to fist lightly in the front of his shirt.
“I don’t want to be alone right now,” you admitted, the truth of it sitting raw in your chest.
And you didn’t want him to either. You knew exactly what he’d do.
He’d find somewhere last-minute, something overpriced and uncomfortable, tell himself it didn’t matter. He wouldn’t sleep, he never did when something was weighing on him, and then tomorrow he’d show up with that careful smile, pretending he was fine so you wouldn’t worry.
“Please don’t—please don’t leave me again.”
You didn’t give him time to overthink it. Your hand tightened in his shirt, pulling him down just enough. And then you kissed him.
It was everything you hadn’t said, everything that had been sitting heavy in your chest for weeks, all of it crashing into that single moment as your lips met his.
His hand came up to your face instinctively, fingers warm against your cheek as he kissed you back, grounding like he needed to make sure you were doing this. You broke it just enough to breathe, your forehead brushing his.
“Stay,” you whispered, your voice soft but certain. His breath hitched.
“I need you, Ry,” you murmured, your fingers curling tighter into his shirt, keeping him close. “Please.”
And the way he looked at you then, like you’d just handed him something he hadn’t dared to hope for.
“Okay,” he said again, but this time it wasn’t resignation.
You were giving him a chance, and he would be an idiot not to take it.
He leans down to kiss you again, and it’s the kind that makes your head spin. It’s the same kiss that got you to say yes to being his girlfriend, the one that made you feel like a teenager all over again.
He reaches his hand under your neck to tilt your head up, tasting you once again, guiding you gently with his mouth against yours.
“Honey…” he breathes against your lips. “We don’t—we don’t have to—“
You weren’t listening to him.
The night had overwhelmed you completely, more than you knew how to hold. The only thing that made sense now was him—and you needed him close. Needed the weight of him, the warmth of him, something real to hold onto.
“Please,” you ask him, already pawing at his shirt, desperate for him to be close to you. “I need you, Ry—please.”
He groans against your neck, trying to keep up.
He knew he could do this for you; you were etched into his brain. He knew how to make you breathe his name, how to make you fall apart from his words, his fingers.
You were practically begging him to hold you, to be near you. He felt it in the way your hands were palming his shoulders, trying to drag him deeper into the flat.
This he could do for you.
This was the least he could do for you.
He dipped his head to your neck, sucking and nibbling gently at the spot you liked. He hums when he hears your soft sigh, continuing until he feels your neck open for him more. He holds you in place as his movements get more precise, feeling his chest soar when he hears the gentle moan pass your lips.
One palm slid under the hem of your shirt, fingertips brushing the bare skin of your waist.
“Can I?”
It pained him to ask. Usually he listens to your body for confirmation, the way you melt into his touch, but tonight is different. He wants to hear you tell him, remind him that he is the one you want right now, the one who gets to have you like this.
You nodded, heart hammering. He eased his coat off your shoulders first, letting it pool behind you on the floor, then hooked his fingers under the edge of your shirt. He didn’t yank it up; he peeled it away tenderly, lips following the path his hands made—crouching almost in worship.
He kissed the newly exposed skin of your stomach, your ribs, the underside of your bra as he tugged the fabric over your head. Gently, he ushered you back toward the couch, far too desperate to make the small journey to the bedroom.
His hands held your hips as he knelt between your thighs, gazing up at you with an expression that could only be described as awestruck. He had seen many things in his life, but none quite as beautiful as you looking at him like this. Soft-lids, flushed cheeks.
He wasn’t religious, but at times like this, he believed he could be.
He dragged the zipper down with agonising slowness, then hooked his fingers into the denim and your underwear at the same time, easing them down your thighs together. Every brush of his knuckles against your skin made you shiver, and he noticed leaning in to press open-mouthed kisses along the inside of your knee as he freed one leg, then the other.
When you were finally bare, he sat back again. His breath hitched visibly.
“God,” he breathed when he saw you, sitting back on his heels just enough to take you in. His hands settled on your hips, thumbs stroking slow circles.
How could he forget this?
You were practically shivering with anticipation, lips parted as you ached for his touch. It had been weeks at this point, the strain between his own legs reminding him. How he had neglected you, both of you.
Tonight, he was going to fix this. Fix everything.
He leaned upward, allowing his hands to finally wander. He groaned, low and genuine. The first slow glide of his fingertips through your folds made you both gasp. You were soaked, slick heat coating his skin instantly, and you because the touch was so light, so careful, so exactly right. He circled your clit once, feather-soft, and your breath caught sharply.
He finally sank one finger inside you, slow and deep, and the stretch was perfect—familiar, warm, the slight callus on his knuckle dragging just right. You arched with a soft cry, and he hummed in approval, curling the digit gently like he was testing the waters even though he already knew exactly what you needed.
Your head fell back against the couch cushions, hips rocking down to meet his hand as the pleasure built in slow, syrupy waves. He was everywhere—mouth pressing kisses to your collarbone—while his fingers worked you open. He wasn’t out of practice at all; every twist, every curl was deliberate.
“Ry—fuck,” you gasped when he crooked his fingers just right, brushing that spot inside you that made sparks shoot up your spine.
His name had never sounded so sweet.
“That’s it, sweetheart,” he cooed as your face scrunched. “There we go.”
You flushed under the weight of his praise, legs parting to allow him even closer, but it wasn’t enough. You needed him closer, needed him inside of you. It had been too long; he owed you that much.
“Ry—“ you breathed out and he stopped his movements instantly.
“What is it?” he asked gently, lips still running along your jaw. “Talk to me.”
Tell him what you need.
“Want more,” you sighed as your hands wandered lower, gently tugging at the waistband of his jeans. He got the message, willing to give you exactly what you wanted tonight.
He pulled back to yank his shirt over his head in one quick motion. The sight of him—bare chest, the faint trail of hair leading down, the way his muscles shifted under his skin—made heat pool low in your belly all over again.
You missed that sight.
You were getting impatient, after weeks of torment, leaning forward to reach the button on his jeans. He couldn’t help but let a small chuckle escape his chest at your eagerness.
“Easy,” his hands came to cover yours. “We have all night.”
You huffed at his response and he sped up his movements, shoving jeans and boxers down in one go, kicking them off toward the end of the couch. His cock sprang free, flushed and already leaking at the tip, and he wrapped a hand around himself, stroking once, twice, eyes never leaving your face as he sucked in a breath.
Gently, he stood, soft as he lay you down. One hand holding the back of your head, the other on your hip, angling you exactly where he could look after you. Where he could take care of you properly.
Instinctively, your legs sprang up to wrap around his hips, automatically aligning his with yours as his cock strains against you.
“Baby—“ he groans as his eyes flutter closed, buring his face in your neck as you rock gently against him, the friction sending small jolts through his body.
“Hey,” he shakes his head as he mumbles. “Gotta take it slow, alright?”
It’s been so long, and he’d be damned if he ended up hurting you like this.
“Don’t wanna,” you plead as you paw at him. “I can take it—promise.”
A low, broken sound rumbled in his throat when the words left your mouth. God, you sounded so sweet beneath him. His beautiful girl begging so gently for him, in a tone he far from deserved.
He settled between your spread thighs, the head of his cock nudging against your slick folds, and he hissed at the contact, eyes fluttering shut for a second.
“Ah—“ He rocked his hips forward slowly, sliding the length of himself along your pussy without pushing in yet, coating himself in you while his hands flexed on either side of your head. Every slow glide bumped against your clit and you whimpered, hips jerking up to chase the friction.
“Please, Ry—”
“I know,” he coos. “I know.”
He just needs to get you there gently, the way he knows you like.
“You ready f’me?” he asks gently, satisfied with the pool of slick between your folds. His hand drifts lazily down as he circles your clit, waiting for your answer.
You nod slowly as you recline on the armrest, opening yourself fully to him. He eases himself in steadily, so thick you felt every inch stretching you open. Your mouth fell open on a silent cry as he bottomed out, hips flush against yours, and he let out the most broken, relieved sound you’d ever heard from him.
It really had been that long.
“That’s good?” he breathes, needing to know.
“Yes,” you mewl in response.
His mouth was on yours again before you’d even fully caught your breath, the kiss slower this time. It made you whimper into him. Your fingers tangled themselves in his hair, nails gripping as you pulled him close, the way you knew drove him wild.
His hips faltered as he let out a broken groan into your neck, trying to keep his composure.
“—sweetheart,” he pants, as he steadies himself with a chuckle. “M’not gonna last long if you do that.”
He pulled back and he looked at you, something pleading in his gaze. It was your turn to smile up at him, lips curling ever so slightly as you leaned up to his lips.
“Then you better hurry up, Ry,” you tease. “You’ve got a lot of making up to do.”
And he intended to do it properly.
He continued with a new pace, your fingers still trailing. It was deeper now, with one hand sliding under your knee to hitch your leg higher around his waist so he could angle even better. The new position made you cry out, back arching clean off the couch, and he groaned in response.
You had never looked more beautiful, so soft under his weight. You still trusted him completely, even after he left you.
After you nearly left him.
His jaw tightened as his hips faltered at the thought before he stopped himself. You felt his hands guide your own up beside your head, lacing your fingers as he folds you deeper into the couch cushions, desperate to hear your moans get louder against his ear.
“Feel good, honey?” he breathed. “C’mon, let me hear you.”
Let him hear he was doing it right. He had to be.
“So good—“ you breathe out. “Always feel so good.”
God, he hopes so.
Far too long he had left you alone, not taking care of you in the way he should. He cursed himself for almost letting you slip between his fingers, cursed himself when he had this to come home to every night.
He’d been such an idiot.
It was his job to take care of you. To make sure you felt wanted, seen, to make sure you felt good.
“Haven’t been good to you,” he admits as his voice breaks. “Not nearly enough—god—“
You whined under him, letting him know he was hitting your sweetspot as your chest brushed against his own.
Just like that.
He needed to see this, needed to give you this, to know that he could still make you feel good.
That you still loved him.
You were losing it under him, every thrust dragging pleasure through you in heavy waves, the emotional weight of his words mixing with the physical until you couldn’t tell where one ended and the other began. Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes—not from sadness, but from how full you felt, how desperately loved.
“Ry—Ry, I—I can’t—” you gasped, hips meeting his on every stroke now, the slap of skin on skin mixing with the wet sounds of him moving inside you.
“You can,” he promised, voice cracking as he thrust harder, chasing the same edge you were on. “Yes, you can, baby, you’re almost there—can feel it—so deep, Christ—“
He reached between you, thumb finding your clit again in tight, perfect circles, and the added stimulation shattered you.
“That’s it—” he groaned, hips stuttering but not stopping, fucking you through it with those same devoted strokes. “There you go—“
Your orgasm crashed over you, vision whiting out as you clenched around him, moaning his name like a prayer. He slowed just enough to let you breathe, kissing you messily, tongues sliding together while he kept moving in shallow thrusts, drawing it out.
When your tremors finally eased, he pulled back just enough to look at you, eyes glassy and adoring, before pulling out.
“You with me?” he asked, voice soft even as sweat beaded on his forehead. You nodded, wrecked and glowing, and tugged him back down into another kiss.
“Mm,” you nodded, against his lips.
He smiled, hand coming up to brush your hair back from your face, fingers careful, as they tucked a loose strand behind your ear. Finally, for the first time this evening, feeling close to you once more.
He lingered there for a moment, hand still cupping your cheek, thumb brushing softly along your skin. You hadn’t pulled away. You were letting him be close again.
“I’m sorry,” he said quietly. “I know I’ve said it, but… I’m really, really sorry.”
You watched him for a second. The panic from earlier had subsided, lost in the haze. Your hand came up to cover his where it rested against your face, holding it there.
“I forgive you.”
“Yeah?”
You nodded, a small smile tugging at your lips.
“Yeah,” you repeated.
Oh, thank God.
He let out an exhausted but satisfied laugh. How he managed to salvage this, he didn’t know, but what he did know, he was damn lucky.
“But—” you began. “If you ever get pulled into something like that again,” you said, holding his gaze, “maybe don’t just… disappear on me and hope for the best?”
He winced. Just a little.
“Yeah. Bad strategy.”
“At least keep me in the loop,” you added, your thumb brushing over his knuckles. “You don’t have to tell me everything if you can’t. But… don’t shut me out like that.”
That was more than fair.
“Okay,” he said, nodding once. “Yeah. I can do that.”
Your brow lifted slightly.
“Can you?”
He let out a breathy laugh, the tension in him easing just enough to let a bit of that familiar energy back through.
“Right—yes. Sorry,” he said, straightening slightly. “If I am ever, hypothetically, recruited into another deeply questionable, government-adjacent science situation—”
You huffed.
“—I will,” he continued, softer now, more sincere, “tell you. Or at the very least… not vanish in the process.”
You smiled properly then.
“Good.”
He nodded, a little more firmly this time, already planning on how he was going to make this right.
Not just tonight, tonight wasn’t nearly enough.
His mind was already moving ahead of him, piecing it together the way it always did, except this time it wasn’t equations or variables—it was you. What you liked. What you needed. All the ways he could show up better.
Tomorrow, for a start. He could take the day off. He would take the day off.
Stratt could wait. The sun—well, the sun had its issues, but it could manage one more day. He’d deal with the fallout later. Right now, there were more important things to fix.
A few days, maybe.
As long as it took.
Slow mornings. Proper meals. Being here fully, the way he should have been all along.
His thumb brushed over your knuckles again, softer this time, almost absent as the thought settled into certainty.
He was going to make this up to you. The way you deserved.
He couldn't wait for you to see it yourself.
a/n: sorry this is late !! things have been hectic on my end (may or may not have been head-hunted to be the head chef of a new fine dining restaurant omg i have the meeting on tuesday!!!) and i still feel super rusty with writing
ive literally just started the book so please excuse any inaccurate plot timeline, hopefully i shall get some more inspo later on as i do really want to write a full series for this thing
as always, let me know what you think ! reqs are open and this has to be the nicest fandom i've ever joined, you all are so lovely <3
your world crumbles when you're forced into a marriage with jeon jungkook, a man whose commanding presence terrifies you, reminding you of your father's cruelty. yet beneath his coldness, jungkook’s unexpected kindness stirs a spark of hope, making you question everything you fear. your life together starts—an emotional journey of two hearts seeking comfort, healing and a chance at love.
pairing — dom!jungkook x sub!femreader
genre — arranged marriage au, forced marriage, marriage of convenience, age gap, reader is of age, forbidden love, forced proximity, enemies to friends to lovers, grumpy x sunshine, rich ceo!jungkook, shy!reader, virgin!reader, poor!reader, obsession and possessive love, pining, slow burn, contrast of worlds, romance, drama, lots of angst, smut, fluff
warnings/tags — 18+, explicit smut, porn with plot, multiple sex scenes, multiple orgasms and positions, unprotected sex, creampie, size kink, soft dom!jungkook, post sex intimacy, post sex soreness, cum leaking, so much domestic stuff (sweet yet filthy at the same time), pussy inspection, oral sex (f. receiving), clit stimulation, pussy worship, eating out, dry humping, face riding and siting, cum eating, overstimulation and edging, crying during sex, breast play and nipple play, he takes care of her so well, so much emotions during sex, use of aloe gel, lots of makeout and kissing, hickies and scratching, sexual fantasies, hair pulling, clothed grinding, he's obsessed with her boobs, mentions of jungkook having blue balls, mentions of losing virginity and descriptions of the memories, massages and tender cuddling, she applies medicine to the scratches on his back, dirty talk praise kink, teasing, so much sexual tension, gym sex, reader gets turned on from watching jungkook workout, possessive!jk, he eats her out and fingers her on the bench, office sex, semipublic sex, clothed sex, cockwarming, riding, cervix play, squirting and gushing, thigh riding, bouncing, 69ing, sexual challenge (jungkook wins by cheating), oral sex (m. receiving), cock stroking, sloppy blowjob, gagging, drunk confessions, drinking and smoking, orgasm denial, loss of anal virginity, anal training, riming, anal fingering, thumbing, use of lots of lube, spitting, dual and triple stimulation, expanded prolonged orgasm, use of butt plug, cum play, future ass play and sexual talks, lots of sweet loving aftercare
wc — 41.6k
a/n — hello sweet babies! i hope you enjoy this huge chapter to the fullest and that it feels like a satisfying read after i haven’t been able to upload this series for almost three months cos i’ve been really busy 😖 i worked incredibly hard on this chapter and spent sm time on it which you can probably tell from the word count alone LMAO originally this chapter was exceeding the 70k+ mark and while i was writing the last smut scene (the submissive jungkook scene) ik a lot of you have been looking forward to — i realized i still had a huge chunk left to write, i didn’t wanna rush it and the chapter itself was becoming way too big so i decided to shift the last part into chapter 14.5 instead, i wanna take my time with it so i can give you guys something really good, i’m really sorry if you were especially excited for submissive!jk and the tiny hint of the plot twist but i promise chapter 14.5 will be uploaded asap cos i’m mostly free now and can dedicate the majority of my time to writing, this chapter holds a lot of sweet moments between them along with plenty of smut cos i wanted to give y’all a good amount of intimacy before the angst 😭 i really hope you enjoy your time reading this chapter and that it makes you as happy reading it as it made me while writing it, please let me know your thoughts, feedback through comments or asks, any kind of interaction truly means the world to me and motivates me sm! love y'all dearly and thank you for reading mwa ! <33
「 SERIES MASTERLIST | MAIN MASTERLIST | READ ON WATTPAD 」
you lay nestled against your husband's bare chest, body heavy with exhaustion, your eyes squinting as the light hits your eyes from between the curtains. with a whimper, you buried your face deeper against him to escape the morning light. you felt the tiredness run too deep, every part of your body aching in the most deliciously used way. last night felt like a dream.
hours upon hours of him worshipping you through the multiple rounds but it wasn’t just the sex but also the aftermath of him taking care of you so adoringly and he barely slept wanting to make sure you were comfortable before he even let himself close his eyes. losing your virginity was everything… he made you feel so loved. you thought sex was only about the man using the woman's body to his satisfaction and that’s it done. they didn’t care and mostly just fell asleep right after. you thought sex in erotic books was just fictional, it didn’t happen in real life and it wasn't as good but jungkook proved you wrong. his cock felt so big inside you beyond what you thought possible and even now you could feel the aftermath and the soreness between your thighs. your pussy is still tender and swollen from taking him again and again, from the way he'd prepped you with his fingers, the dildo you'd both played with and finally him. his cum was still slowly trickling out of you coating your inner thighs and seeping onto the fresh sheets he'd changed in the middle of the night to keep things comfortable after cleaning you. the rose petals were still scattered on the floor. you shifted slightly in his strong arms, your body felt battered in the best way. your jaw ached as well from taking him in your mouth and a little raw. you also didn’t have to look in the mirror to know that your body was filled with marks, hickies and his fingerprints from his grip. yet beneath the soreness there was this satisfaction, a dreamy contentment. it was almost like you were floating. you felt so happy.
your eyes closed as you felt your heart racing with emotion because not once did your traumas surface last night. not once did you think about your father or the memories of him forcing himself on your mother. jungkook made it so romantic and special constantly checking on you every step. despite all those weeks of teasing, the video calls where you pushed him… he held back, he was patient, let you explore and never crossed a line. he's been such a good man for you. tears welled up in your eyes as you inhaled his scent but they were happy ones especially now that you were high on the emotions from the aftermath of pleasure. you couldn’t forget how he filled you, how he'd turned pain into ecstasy, you couldn’t stop replaying how good it felt. how he'd hit that spot you didn’t even know existed inside you until you shattered around him over and over. you didn’t know that you'd feel so empty afterwards after being full of him like he filled a part of you that you didn’t know was missing. the pain was a sweet badge of just how thoroughly he'd loved you.
your lips part with awareness as you feel jungkook's arms suddenly tighten around you making you realize that he’s waking up. his one large hand is splayed across your back, the other cradling the back of your head as he nuzzles into your hair. his chest rose and fell against your cheek. he was naked too, his bare warmth pressing against you and his semi hard cock resting heavily against your thigh still slightly sticky from the night's activities. jungkook's own thoughts were a mix of everything, having you in his arms like this… it felt so unreal. at one point in his life he could only ever imagine having you like this. last night was just as special to him and it turned out exactly how he wanted, not rushed even when you were on your knees begging for his cock. there was just pleasure and love, so much of it.
“baby…”
he murmurs out finally, his voice husky from sleep and the groans he'd let out last night as his lips pressed a kiss against your forehead. his fingers traced your hip careful not to press too hard against your exhausted body.
“how are you feeling this morning? be honest with me, i know i was a… lot,” you blushed deeply, burying your face further into his neck as another trickle of his cum leaked out of you making you clench instinctively.
“i-i'm so sore jungkook, everywhere… but i can't stop thinking about how good it felt,” you stammered shyly, not meeting his eyes yet. he lets out a soft hum of concern tilting your chin up with gentle fingers so he could look into your eyes, his gaze filled with adoration and also a hint of guilt for leaving you this way.
“fuck hearing you say that… you have no idea what it means to me, i'm so proud of you, does it hurt too much? how's the rest of your body? legs okay? does your back hurt?” you shook your head with a fluttering stomach, you could never fully get used to him praising you. it made your clit twitch in response even now. he smiled softly and pulled you impossibly closer, naked bodies molding together beneath the sheets as his lips found yours in a slow kiss, tongues brushing together tasting the intimacy of the night before as he pulled away from your mouth, you went back to laying your head against his chest, both of your thoughts drifting to the pleasure once again and he didn’t need to see your face to understand that you had flushed cheeks. you were ripping his shirt, touching him all over and now you were all shy in the morning and he found it so adorable. it makes him adore every side of you.
he continues holding you like that for a while, basking in each other while his rhythmic heartbeat beneath your ear seems to lull you. you let out a contented sigh as one of his legs makes your thighs part making him rest between them as your brow furrows at the feel of his hard muscle resting against your pussy but there wasn’t anything sexual about it, it was about the connection of the both of you just in the bliss. you realized that you were leaving a slick trail along his thigh but his arms were wrapped too securely around you as if he didn’t mind it at all as his other hand threaded through your messy hair. you could sense that despite the obvious arousal of his cock against your stomach, he made no move to act on it. his tired freshly deflowered girl. his hand rested on your mound lightly, not too much pressure for a while before his hand slid down to gently caress your ass cheek before slipping between your legs from behind. his fingers didn’t push inside, they just rested against your leaking puffy pussy lips and feeling the wetness there.
“oh..”
a moan leaves you as the soothing touch sends goosebumps across your skin.
“mm baby… you're still leaking my cum,” he said softly, breath hitting against your ear. he kissed your temple then your cheek, then captured your lips once again as if he couldn’t get enough of you. this time the kiss deepened gradually, his hand cupping your jaw as he poured affection into every brush of his tongue and every nip of his teeth against your lips. when you pulled back breathless as his eyes searched yours.
“i was worried i was too rough at the end. you took me so well though... does it sting when i touch you like this hm?” you whimpered breathily, pressing your forehead to his.
“a little… but don’t stop please.”
“yeah?” he asked lovingly. his eyes told you that the concern didn’t leave him fully, your hands curling against his chest.
“last night no one had ever made me feel that safe, i didn’t think about… anything bad not once. it was just you,” you whispered so he’d know that you were being honest. his arms tighten around you causing your breasts to squish on his chest, a low groan escaping him as his hardening cock presses more firmly against your thigh but he was too focused on prepping kisses along your jaw and down your neck, sucking occasionally, he gave your skin a swipe of his tongue.
“i'm so fucking glad,” he murmurs between kisses. he leans up to nuzzle his nose against yours.
“today is your pampering day sweetheart,” he affirms with a coy look on his face.
“p-pampering day?”
“mhm, today is just about taking care of my girl,” you giggled feeling giddy under his attention, the sound muffled against his skin, one of your legs draping more fully over his as you cuddled closer. your hand traced the muscles on his abdomen before you stopped just above his v-line, even though you couldn’t see his cock that was covered by the blanket, you could feel every inch of it.
“godd you're perfect,” he lets out a warm chuckle of his own at your giggle. he rolls slightly so you are half on top of him, your bodies pressed flush. his hands roam, stroking up and down your back sometimes cupping your ass then resting on your hips. both of you alternated between the touches and occasional unhurried kisses, breaths mingling. the kiss broke into smaller ones, soft pecks on your lips or his cheek. he could stay like this all day, naked, holding you, talking, touching. no rush, not a single care of this world except having you close to him in the quiet moment and just holding each other. his hands never stopped their loving caresses as bodies intertwined, the talks between you both continuing as he asked about every little ache on your body and listened intently. his fingers sometimes tracing the sides of your tummy making you laugh and push at his chest at the ticklish feeling. both of you are completely overwhelmed with the joy of being wrapped up in each other. jungkook's arms stayed wrapped around your exhausted body for several long moments. he pulled back a bit as he gazed down at you.
“let me take care of you now yeah?” he cupped your cheek, his thumb stroking softly. you nodded shyly.
“okay...”
you felt so sore everywhere especially down there and just wanted to stay in bed, unwilling to move but you trusted him. jungkook's expression melted further as he sat up first, stretching with a groan, his back muscles flexing deliciously and you couldn't help but stare awestruck with parted lips as he pushed his messy long hair away from his face. he reached for one of his oversized black shirts draped over the nearby chair and looked back at you with a curve on the corner of his lips. he helped you sit up slowly, supporting your body as your legs felt weak and your inner thighs were so tender that you couldn't stop the wince from escaping.
“careful baby...”
he settled you carefully before slipping the shirt over your head, guiding your arms through the sleeves. you sighed at the smell of him surrounding you even precisely, your nose burrowing in the hem as he leaned down to press a kiss against your forehead before pecking your lips.
“there she is, my pretty girl in my shirt,” he murmured against your mouth smiling.
“looks better on you than it ever did on me,” you blushed at his words and he leaned down to pick you up.
“koo… i can try to walk, you don't have to carry me.”
“no way,” he shook his head firmly and without another word, he scooped you up bridal style, one arm under your knees and the other around your back. you gasped at the sudden lift, your arms instinctively wrapping around his neck.
“i've got you. don't put pressure on those legs yet, let yourself heal first yeah?” every step he took towards the bathroom rocked you in his arms. you were so small like this and it made him want to keep you in his arms all day. that was what he was planning to do today anyways. in the bathroom he set you down carefully on the floor keeping one hand on your waist for support. the mirror reflected both of you as you stared a bit shocked since you were looking at yourself for the first time after losing your virginity, at your messy hair and swollen lips, neck and collarbone dotted with love bites and if you weren't wearing the shirt, you'd probably be seeing all the marks on the rest of your body as well. your cheeks burn as you see jungkook not having a care in this world as he's shamelessly naked and his soft cock hangs freely for you to see jiggling with his movements as if being naked around you was the most natural thing. he grabbed your toothbrushes squeezing the toothpaste onto both with ease. standing close behind you, he handed you yours.
“here you go baby,” he rasped. his free arm looped around your middle, chin resting on your shoulder as you both started brushing, he watched you in the mirror with such fond eyes. foam gathered at the corner of your lips and he chuckles, wiping it away with his thumb. it felt so domestic like an instinct, it didn’t feel weird at all. after both of you finished rinsing your mouth, you turned to him as you felt the familiar pull on your lower belly.
“jungkook... i need to pee,” you whispered.
“sure go ahead,” he says absentmindedly as he wipes his mouth with a towel as if it weren't a big deal at all. you glanced at the toilet then back at him, shifting on your feet nervously.
“can you… go out? for a minute? please?” he paused what he was doing and tilted his head, an understanding smile playing on his lips as he cupped your face with both hands.
“hey… no, i'm not going anywhere. i've seen every single part of you princess, inside and out. you don’t have to hide anything from me ever and peeing in front of me won't change how i see you okay?”
“but... it's embarrassing,” you whisper, looking down at your fingers. you knew he was right, not a single part of you he hadn't seen but still you didn't know how to do it, it felt more private. he turned you gently toward the toilet guiding you to sit before placing a kiss at the tip of your nose.
“that's exactly why i am staying. nothing about you is embarrassing to me, you're my wife,” he wanted to see all of you even the small things. his hand stayed on your shoulder, thumb stroking comforting circles as he crouched slightly. eyes locked on yours with not a single hint of judgment.
“relax for me okay? it's natural, just let go,” you hesitated, heart pounding hard and the pressure on your bladder was insistent. his words seemed to relax you a little, the resistance fading and with a tiny nod, you parted your thighs a little. he remained just like that, not even turning away. finally with a shaky breath, you let go. the sound of the stream hitting the water below was loud in the quiet bathroom and it made your face pinker, you whimpered unable to even meet his eyes fully, staring at his chest instead. you squeezed your eyes shut as you tried not to think, instead he reached out and brushed a strand of hair behind your ear. the relief was immediate but mixed with the pain of the sensitivity of your walls that have been thoroughly used and stretched last night. your body still didn't fully adapt to accepting him. jungkook stayed right there watching your face more than anything, his expression loving.
“such a good girl,” he whispered warmly.
“does it hurt when you pee baby?” he asks next as he sees the slight discomfort on your face from the burning sensation. the comfort of his presence and words made all the embarrassment disappear slowly.
“a little… it stings a bit but it's okay,” there was this deep protectiveness in his heart seeing you like this and how much you trusted him enough to let him see all the vulnerable sights of you. you were his completely now with no barriers and no secrets, it was the intimacy of being so open in front of your partner with no fear or embarrassment. even the little things like this, apart from sex mattered and deepened the bonding.
“you're doing so well, almost done?” when the flow finally stopped, you let out a shaky breath reaching for the toilet paper but jungkook gently took it from your hands.
“let me,” he said simply. he wiped you carefully, his touch mindful of your swollen core as you stared at him with mortified eyes but overwhelmed with so many feelings that it felt like you might burst. you never thought a man could love you like this and a small part of you felt closer to him because of it. that he wasn’t disgusted at all. the paper came away with traces of his cum and your wetness which he then discarded.
“there… all clean see?” he remained kneeling before you, his thumbs brushing your knee.
“baby,” he husks out.
“how about a nice warm bath together in the tub? it'll help you feel better, we can just soak, nothing else, if you don’t want that, sounds good?” you nodded bashfully, your hand finding its place on his bare chest.
“that sounds nice koo…”
“that's my girl, come here,” with care he scooped you up into his arms once again, not willing to let you walk even for a minute and he set you down on the cool edge of the large bathtub before he started filling it with warm water, the steam filling the space around you both. he also added the bath oils that you loved the scent of so much.
“arms up for me love,” he whispered, his eyes fixed on yours intensely. you lifted your arms and his hands moved to grasp the hem of his oversized t-shirt around you before he peeled it away to expose your naked body to him. he sucked in a sharp breath, his gaze roaming over you like he was seeing you for the first time all over again because it seemed so from the marks around your body, the way you seemed to glow after giving yourself to him after he thoroughly claimed every part of you, it was like your beauty had been added.
“look at you...”
he says in awe. his fingers traced lightly over the hickeys on your collarbone and the bruises on your thighs and waist that he could see properly now in broad daylight with no blanket or clothing covering you. these marks on you god... they made him feel so many things.
“my beautiful girl..”
he croons, his hand brushing your arm. you bite your lip feeling cherished under his admiring stare, your thighs pressed together. being right in front of his eyes again was making heat pool on your belly once again despite your tenderness. jungkook seemed to notice that as his hands rested on your waist, the position puts him eye level with your body.
“let me see sweetheart. i need to check on you. spread your legs for me a little?” he asks soothingly. he promised he'd care for you today with no pressuring and he was going to do exactly that. he carefully parted your thighs, his thumb stroking your inner thighs in circles and you gasped at the feeling of the cool air hitting your exposed pussy suddenly. jungkook's eyes darkened with hunger and concern as he took in the sight with no barriers. your pussy was swollen, the outer lips puffy and reddened slightly. he could see a trickle of his white cum slip out from your entrance slowly mixing with your own arousal that was just helplessly there whenever he was around. your body is always mostly aroused with him. the clear sight of it and how deeply he'd taken you made his cock throb but he ignored it once again for you.
“shitt baby... you're so swollen,” he murmurs. one of his fingers hovered near your mound but didn't touch it yet.
“i was so big for you wasn't i hm? my cum is still dripping out,” he observed and there was no doubt of the desire in his voice but he felt so bad too that he inflicted even a little bit of pain on you. you pant at his words and the way he's looking at you, your hand gripping the side of the tub. having him look at you like this makes everything worth it. he leaned in closer, pressing an open mouthed kiss to the inside of your thigh then another higher up.
“gonna take good care of every inch of you today understand?” he rasps seriously, eyes meeting yours and your lips part at the promises they hold, you cannot help but nod shakily.
“touch me please,” he smiles at your words before placing another kiss beside your mound.
“i can never keep my hands off you..” his hands brushed up and down your legs. his thumbs parted your folds gently to see your inflamed inner clitoris, which looked more enlarged than usual and had a dark shade from the constant stimulation it received. he groaned low in his throat as he saw another bead of his cum ooze out of you.
“god you're so full of me even now...”
“mmm yes...”
you admitted breathlessly, your hand reaching down to thread through his hair. he looked up at you with those big expressive eyes that held everything and that always made your stomach flutter, you could see how much he was holding back right now.
“tell me if it hurts or what feels okay alright?”
“yes... please touch me,” you repeated once again, voice trembling. you knew nothing else could soothe you more than his touch.
“just be gentle?”
“of course, always for you,” his fingers were slick as he carefully wiped away some of the leaking cum with a soft cloth first then let the warm water from the tub lap against you. he soothed the other lips with light strokes.
“you're gonna be okay… i got you,” his thumb circled your clit with the barest pressure, drawing an immediate moan from you.
“ah,” it felt like your clit had a thousand more nerves from how sensitive it felt. it has also been directly exposed from the hood from how ripe it was.
“koo...”
your hips twitched and he didn't need words to understand.
“i know love, shh,” he kept his touches light even as his own breathing grew heavier as the steam rose around you both. his thumbs applied enough pressure to keep your trembling legs open for him, preventing any instinctive urge to close them. the way he was staring without a hint of pulling away at the area between your legs, like he was almost inspecting you
“koo… don’t stare at me like that please,” you breathed though your legs stayed parted for him. your entrance was slightly open and clenching as if remembering the way his cock filled you hours earlier especially now from the owner's gaze as your inner folds peaked out like a spread flower. your pussy looked abused in the best way. he shook his head, leaning in even closer until his breath ghosted directly over your heat sending shivers up your spine.
“no hiding from me ever again. tell me if anything hurts too much yeah?” you let out a breath, your eyes meeting his vulnerably.
“o-okay...” his fingers brushed over your slit and the sudden sharp sensation made your hand fly down to grip his broad shoulder for support.
“ahh… jungkook,” you moaned quietly, your fingers digging into the muscle of his shoulder as he held you open. his brows furrowed in concentration as he sees how your slit is fluttering with weakness and the redness that colored everything from your mound down to your perineum.
“that's it… how do you feel?” he asks. he calms you while his thumb brushes ever so lightly beside your swollen clit, close enough but not yet touching the hypersensitive button directly.
“it... it burns a little bit in a good way,” you admitted breathlessly as you fought the urge to squirm under his scrutiny.
“it's so sensitive…”
but you needed him more than anything, whatever he could give you as your hips give the tiniest roll toward his face. jungkook hummed in approval as his eyes darkened further with lust while he remained perfectly in control staying focused entirely on your pleasure at the moment. you took his fingers so eagerly last night, his tongue lapping at you for hours and seeing your pussy up close reminds him of how you'd squeezed his cock. he wanted to touch and admire you at once and he still wouldn't be able to get enough. one of his fingers traced the slick seam of your entrance, collecting the creamy mixture of your combined fluids without pushing inside and then he spread it upward over your fold making everything slicker and wetter.
“mhmm,” you panted as you arched, your head falling back at his slick touches. you let out a longer needier moan when he continued his inspection.
“n-ngh… it's so sensitive inside koo,” he nodded understandingly, his other hand resting on your belly rubbing soothingly there over the soft skin easing some of your tension.
“i know princess. i know exactly how sensitive you must be. i'm not going inside at all, i promise you okay?” his fingers worked like an expert's as always and you knew his intentions well and that was to make you feel good. his fingers massaged your outer lips, pressing just enough to stimulate without causing pain while his eyes never left your core watching every throb and twitch. his light touches felt teasing almost and it kept on going for minutes mixed with your breathy whimpers and his praise.
“does this feel okay right here baby?” he asked repeatedly as he alternated his touches. your sighs turned into more contented sounds under his devoted attention.
“so good...”
you squirmed as your head fell back on the tile once again, your breasts rising and falling. jungkook knew that was another of your body's signals to go further as his finger moved to your clit now.
“yeah it's good?” he murmurs. you whined as he began circling the tip of it with the pad of his thumb while keeping your folds spread with his other hand. your toes curled tightly.
“o-oh… koo!” you let out a sob at the pain mixed with pleasure at the direct clit touches from how raw it is as your fingers threaded into his hair for anchoring yourself. he watched your face the entire time, taking in every expression, ready to adjust at the slightest sign of discomfort.
“talk to me sweet girl… does it hurt when i rub your clit like this or does it make the ache feel a little better?” he questioned affectionately. he adds the tiniest bit more pressure and leans down to blow air directly on your cunt. you gasped, your hips rocking towards him as he lets himself give you an open mouthed kiss right on your clit.
“better... so much better koo,” you whimper.
“don't stop pleaseee,” you dragged out the last word in a moan making him smile at how extra responsive you were to him, all because he wore you out. it does something primal to him. he kept on going alternating between gliding strokes along your folds or around your clit with two fingers now as he seemed to sense your noises getting higher. he pressed kisses all over your inner thighs and mound as he scooped more of your essence from the slit to rub it on your clit making you writhe on the edge of the tub. he was using his own cum to help soothe your battered pussy that had taken him so deep, he knew that if you weren't on the pill he'd have knocked you up for sure. the callouses he had on the tip of his fingers and palm enhanced the sensations even more—nothing that your fingers could ever satisfy. you could see his increased longing as he stares at your pussy, his breath ghosting over it making your entire body shiver in anticipation.
“can i eat your pussy princess? please? use my tongue to make it all better hmm?” he wants to worship the pussy that took him so well as his words were full of sincere devotion, his eyes never leaving yours as he waited patiently for your consent, his hands still stroking your thighs. your lips parted as your fingers tugged his hair in encouragement.
“yes… please koo,” his mouth always felt like heaven and you loved it when he ate you out so much, you'd never deny that offer but little did you know that he loved doing it even more. your body relaxes further against the bathroom wall, your legs trembling as you steadied yourself for him, wanting it so much. he starts by pressing a kiss on top of your mound right above your swollen clit and his little kisses are the ones that drive you a little more crazy. his tongue was on you at last staring at the very bottom of your slit where the mess of his dried cum still trickled from your gaping entrance. his wet warm tongue collected the evidence of it in long strokes starting to lap at it.
“a-ah... oh my god,” you sobbed at how good it felt. it was like he was pleasuring you and simultaneously giving you relief from your soreness which was the best combination ever. the heat of his mouth was the perfect balm against your heated flesh and it immediately sent you sparks of relief as your back arched. he hummed in satisfaction at the taste, the vibration makes your clit throb hard and makes your hips twitch as fresh wetness begins to mix with the remnants he was cleaning.
“mmm you taste like us baby, so fucking sweet mixed with me,” he groaned against your pussy, the words muffled against your folds as he continued his attentive work, you grew more squirmy beneath him but he steadied you with his hands.
“relax for me... just focus on my tongue,” he coos deeply. he took his sweet time as if he didn't have to hurry at all, he didn't eat your pussy like he usually did, hungry and quick as if he couldn't get enough because he wanted to make it intense for you and to make you cum quick but this was about making you feel better while feeling all the waves of the sensations his tongue was capable of. he licked continuous stripes up the entire length of your slit, avoiding direct sucking on your engorged clit at first knowing it would hurt you if he did so. he used his mouth to suck onto each of your folds, his tongue tending against it lovingly as your toes curled and quiet little gasps left you. your hands tightened on his hair, holding on as more of your juices started to leak from you which he was so appreciative of because he swallowed them greedily with hungry wet noises. it only seemed to heighten your pleasure. his tongue was so skilled and it was like he was turning your discomfort into something healing and erotic. he sucked so gently on one swollen puffy lip before moving to the other... carefully oh so carefully. all you could hear was his slurps, his hums of satisfaction and your breathy moans that were growing louder and more desperate with each passing minute.
“uh… uh… uh…”
he also kept you spread for him gently but never forced or pinning you down, letting you lift your hips or arch when things got more intense.
“you're doing so good, my brave girl aren't you?” he growls. he pulled back just enough to speak, his chin and lips glistening with your essence as he looked up at you from between your legs.
“want me to make you cum so nice and slow with just my tongue baby?” your breath hitched as you pulled at his hair bringing his face closer and nodded jerkily. he lets out a gruff chuckle at your desperation and goes back in with renewed hunger, this time focusing on your twitching clit with small circles with just the very tip of his tongue, followed by more long dragging licks that started from your fluttering hole and all the way up to your clit. your legs felt like warm honey as you clenched again, sending trickles of arousal on his waiting tongue as he moaned at the taste while your legs couldn't remain still fully rocking against his mouth.
“koo...”
you mewled as he gave a subtle suckle on your clit. it felt like it was going on for minutes after minutes for how slow he was going, it wasn't just to bring you to orgasm even though he'd do that eventually but to just worship your cunt. there wasn't a single fold or crease in the external part where his tongue didn't go exploring all parts of you like he was memorizing your pussy once again. he clearly avoided penetrating you with his tongue or giving your clit direct suckles.
“o-oh!” your whimpers turned into little cries now from how his pace was increasing and he could sense that you were reaching your peak from the way you shook so hard so he redoubled his efforts while still being careful. your thighs clamped hard around his head while your pussy throbbed hard against his tongue and his mouth seals on your clit, sucking it softly making you let out a loud keening cry.
“jungkook i'm cumming… ahh oh god!” tears welled in your eyes from the sensation when your orgasm finally went over you. it was a gentle orgasm rather than something intensely deep and shuddering that left you boneless and seeing stars under your eyelids from the previous night. it was the type of orgasm that left you boneless in the best way without too much. he stayed right there through every aftershock, his tongue still moving licking and collecting your release to carry you through the orgasm and to bring you back down. he couldn't stop groaning when he ate you out, he could never get enough and he could still get the remnants taste of his salty cum mixed with your release as well.
“that's it… give it all to me baby,” he hums. he gave you a few more licks making sure not to put his tongue on the reddened areas, he didn't want to overstimulate you from how hard you were throbbing, he stopped. he already knew how overwhelmed you were. he licked his lips clean before his eyes locked on you where you lay lax on the wall and panting heavily with glistening eyes. he moved up to press a kiss right beside your belly button and made his way up murmuring praises.
“how does it feel now my love? a little better are we?” the way he asks you so patiently and his nickname “my love” makes you flush as your eyelids flutter. you clung to jungkook with every ounce of strength left in you as your body still shudders from the aftershocks leaving your mind hazy. his shoulders felt like the only anchor as your feet dug into them, your fingers still buried in his thick hair as you tugged him upward with a needy almost childish whimper.
“jungkook… come here please,” you breathed out as your heart thudded beneath your chest. you needed him close. he rose from between your legs without hesitation, his chin still shining with your essence as his eyes locked on yours with such profound attention. he looked at you in a way as if nothing in the world mattered except fulfilling your request.
“i'm right here baby, not going anywhere else,” he murmurs. he climbed over you as his arms wrapped around your waist to pull your limp body flush against his own heated form. he was burning with pent up need.
the water sloshed around you both as he settled with you inside the tub full of warm water now and you gasped in contentment at the feeling of yourself soaking in it. he cupped the back of your head and settled you in his arms as your face found its perfect home in the crook of his neck, nuzzling into it with a sigh and you could even find traces of the musk of your pleasure still on his jaw and some that had slid down to his neck as well. he positioned you until you were on top of him and straddling him under the water as your legs wrapped around his waist. you couldn't help but press a kiss against his collarbone tasting his sweat, both your hands finding their way on his chest. jungkook lets out a contented noise, he tilts his head to capture your lips in a passionate kiss that stole whatever little breath you had left. his tongue slips into your mouth, letting you taste yourself fully on him that has mixed with his saliva making you moan inside his mouth. he sucks on your lower lip, tongue exploring your mouth as he signs hotly into your mouth, all of it building into a kiss so full of emotion that tears pricked your eyes once again. last night and the recent orgasm made you more sentimental than usual and with his constant closeness, you've never felt more whole.
“you taste so fucking sweet even now,” he whispered against your cheek after pulling away. his hand stroked your spine while the other hand held you close and you smiled at his words, your nose pressing against his chest feeling your pussy clench. he closed his eyes, leaning back and soaking in the moment and his weary muscles from exerting so much energy last night. both of you dreamily pressed together while you still soaked in the post orgasm as the entire world felt invisible other than the two of you. your finger traced the line of his jaw and then downward over his pectorals before settling on the thump of his heart beneath your palm and he watched you with fond half lidded eyes and how free you were with him that you wouldn't think twice before touching him. before this when you were still learning, you were so hesitant and shy, now touching him came all naturally to you. your breasts pressed against his chest. both your heart and soul seemed to connect together in their own way. he kissed the top of your head and every exposed skin he could find and butterflies seemed all over the place in your stomach. his hand never stopped touching you as well, caressing your side and then beneath the water to caress your round ass cheeks just stroking without intruding into your other areas.
“last night... it feels unreal you know?” he lets out a breath and a lovesick grin on his face as you blush deeply and smile against his neck, moving closer causing the water to lap around your joined bodies. it felt like both of you were teenagers in love.
“it feels like i—i can still feel you inside me,” you confessed. you could feel the way his erection reacted at your words and you shifted a little making him groan and you felt bad about how he was taking care of you while he was aching without making a single comment about it. your hand slipped under the water, going forward to brush against his cock and he caught your wrist before you could wrap your hand around him and brought it to his mouth to place a kiss on the back of it before bringing it back up to rest over his heart, where it has been before.
“easy baby, today is all about you..”
“i'm staying home with you all day today so i can take care of my beautiful wife,” he grumbles playfully. you bite your lower lip, looking at him with wide eyes.
“do you understand?” he asks when you don't reply to him in a mock serious way making you giggle. he doesn't waste time and grabs the body wash squirting some in his palms before getting his soapy hands on you, starting at your shoulders where the massage takes away any tension left before sliding down to your arms, making you sigh and melt further into him.
“hah...”
you squeaked when both his hands suddenly cupped your full breasts, his thumb rubbing your nipples that were still raw from all the attention they received as they tightened further under his touch.
“these pretty tits… looked so goddamn beautiful bouncing last night while i fucked you. ugh i can't get enough,” he husks. the memory of it has both of your bodies reacting, you still couldn't be used to how he had no filter and always blurted out such dirty and lewd things, it makes you feel things every time and makes you wetter during intimate times, you believed you could cum just from his words alone. both of you, like, this brought back thoughts of when you both first showered in the tub together after his accident and he was still recovering from his injuries. when he'd allowed you to just have the tip of his cock in a moment of closeness while washing each other so thoroughly.
“this feels so much like that first time we were in here together,” you croaked. as his hands ventured lower carefully washing your lower body, avoiding going near your core just over your mound and your butt, making you tingle all over while all the sticky mess from your body is being washed away. jungkook on the other hand, also smiled recalling the memory of that day while his fingers continued their ministrations on you.
“yeah… i remember every bit of it. i wanted you so desperately but then i held back because i knew you needed more time,” he leaned in to kiss you again as his hard cock pressed against you, he got turned on even while he was simply caring for you and being all lovey. the soapiness continued as you both soaked and you returned the favor by washing him too over his chest and abs whenever you could reach. you loved feeling the way his muscles flexed under your touch always. your head fell on his shoulder as you couldn't help but comment on the way his cock was pressing against you, the afterglow seemed to loosen your tongue as well.
“you're still too hard for me... even after everything we did,” you whisper. he pulled you in tighter so your head rested more comfortably against his chest and his erection nestled between your bodies.
“i can't help it when you're naked and so soft against me but i'm more than okay with just holding you,” his hands cupped your face looking into your eyes that has grown hooded with emotion.
“you always put me first without ever thinking of yourself,” you croak as both your foreheads press together, just breathing the same air as his eyes soften.
“that's because you are safe with me baby and you deserve all of it and more,” he replies with so much utter adoration. both of you stay like that for what felt like hours until the soap was washed away from your bodies and the water ran cold but none of you seemed to notice that as you stayed molded like that in the tub like two pieces of a perfect puzzle. after a while jungkook helped you out first as he lifted you gently and settled your feet on the bath mat, when you took a step forward, a sharp pain went between your legs as a hiss left your lips before you could stop it when you took yet another step. you gripped his arm out of instinct, the shower had mostly washed away everything but the deep sensitivity was still there and will probably be there for the entire day today. jungkook instantly grabbed you, steadying you so you didn't take another step and wrapped a large towel around your body tucking it securely above your breasts after wiping all the excess water from your body and hair with gentle pats and doing the same to himself roughly.
“careful baby, don't try to walk just yet,” his voice was filled with concern as he put the towel around his waist too before he scooped you up into his arms once again cradling you just like he's already done twice since the morning as if you were his little baby to take care of and he wouldn't let you get on your legs at all.
“it hurts too much when you try to walk?” he questions once again. you shook your head as you inhaled his masculine scent now mixed with the freshness.
“it doesn't hurt a lot... just a little when i put pressure on walking,” he hummed but didn't seem much convinced and he was carrying you like you were made of glass. he carried you to the bedroom setting you down carefully on the edge of the bed.
“stay right here yeah?” he leaves you for a short while to grab the hair dryer, a comb and a few skincare products as you watch a bit dumbfounded but with a fluttering heart. he plugged in the dryer and sat behind you in the bed, his legs bracketing yours protectively. he gathered your damp hair, fingers threading through the strands with surprising care for a big man. he turned the blow dryer on as he directed the air over your hair, his other hand lifting sections carefully to dry them from the roots. like he knew exactly how to dry a woman's hair properly, like he knew by heart. he's really doing this you thought... drying your hair like it's the most important thing in the world right now. you looked down at your fingers, glad that the mirror wasn't in front of you so he couldn't see how red your cheeks were and how shy you suddenly felt. probably the last time anyone cared for your hair like this was your mother when she used to bathe you as a kid. your eyes fluttered at the feeling of his hands and the blow dryer as you leaned into him.
“feels good?” he asked softly. his breath brushing your ear as he worked.
“your hair smells so nice. i love doing this for you,” he admits with a grin of his own.
“it feels amazing,” you whispered.
“you're spoiling me,” you admit bashfully.
he chuckled lowly.
“uhuh? just taking care of my pretty girl,” he continued drying another section, he was patient, taking his time making sure not a single strand was tangled or left damp. every so often he'd lean in and press a kiss to your bare shoulder that makes you squirm slightly. once your hair was mostly dry and fluffy, he set the dryer aside and picked up the comb. he went through your knots slowly so it didn't pull your hair making sure that there weren't any knots left.
“there we go... all soft,” he murmured proudly. his free hand smoothed down your hair with each pass.
“koo... you're really good at this. where did you learn?”
“learning for you..” he replied simply.
“i watched tutorials last week and watched you do it yourself, i actually wanted to be ready for moments like this,” he went through the last layer and you tried to hold back tears at how he was an acts of service man how much effort he put in the little things because he wanted to. his hands paused for a bit and he reached for the moisturizer next, the same brand that you always use every morning. he puts a small amount on his fingers before coming to sit in front of you and you couldn't even meet his eyes properly from how adored he made you feel, he grinned before tilting your head up with a finger.
“what happened hmm?”
“j-just overwhelmed,” you stuttered and his thumb traced your cheek, making your eyes open to meet his once again.
“i love you...”
he said it with such rawness in his voice as if from the depths of his heart he meant it, like those three words alone told you how you should get used to moments like this, like there were thousands more to come in the future and that you were his wife, a tear escaped you which he caught with his thumb, understanding your overload of emotions without any words. he distracts you by gently applying dots of the moisturizer on your cheeks, chin and forehead making you let out a teary smile.
“that's the smile i love,” he gruffs with an exaggerated nod making your smile turn into a giggle. he applied the moisturizer carefully, smoothing it over your cheekbones and down the bridge of your nose and forehead with utmost care. so much care and gentleness that your eyes fall closed once again savoring the closeness of him. the feeling of being cherished like this. he tilted your chin applying more on your jawline and neck, his fingers tracing the hickeys he'd left on your neck. then came the lip balm, he uncapped it and swiped it slowly across your lower lip and then the upper lip, his gaze locked on your mouth obsessively. he could still see the vivid image of these pouty lips wrapped around his cock. he leaned in, pecking your lips and tasting the strawberry balm and you.
“better?”
“much better,” you crooned. he laughed softly when he understood how shy you were and pulled you closer until you were close to him now that he was done, careful not to jostle you.
“no need to be shy with me yeah? let me pamper you,” you nestled into him.
“i will...” you sign out and he held you tighter, lips brushing your temple.
“good that's all i want,” he afterwards settles you more firmly on the bed, spreading your legs slightly to rest himself between them as he guides your body to lay back against the pillows and blankets that were still a mess from last night. you shivered as the morning air brushed against your hypersensitive folds, even the tiniest feeling towards it made you twitch. your entrance still seemed to throb as you watched him reach over to the nightstand to grab another item that he'd also brought with the moisturizer and it was a clear tube of unscented aloe gel. he squeezes a generous amount onto his clean fingertips, his other palm comes to rest on your thigh before his eyes meet yours.
“baby?” his voice overflows with affection.
“this is aloe gel alright? and i'm gonna apply it on you.”
“this might feel a little cold at first but it'll help with the soreness and bring down that swelling. tell me if it's too much or if anything feels uncomfortable okay?” you let out a shaky breath and felt your pulse quicken because of how he is so set on making you feel better in every way possible even when he wasn't responsible for the pain at all. the pain was something you'd go through all over again if it meant having him and him being the man to take your virginity.
“okay…” you breathe and he smiled at your words. his gaze dripped with nothing but care, your exposed pussy and your slit clenched with residual spasms and he knew he had to focus specifically on that area from the way his cock had slid in and out repeatedly and caused the swelling.
“i know sweetheart,” he whispered huskily.
“are you ready for me?” he asks again to confirm and you nod with a sign. he carefully parted your legs a little wider to expose you fully for his treatment. his fingers, now generously coated in aloe gel hovered just above your mound before slowly spreading the gel along your outer labia. the cooling sensation hits you almost instantly, crashing onto you with relief as if the gel itself had certain properties to take away all your irritation.
“gosh...” you let out a whimper as your hips twitched at the sudden comfort against the persistent ache that had lasted for hours.
“ahh... it's cold...” you panted as your eyes fluttered shut. jungkook paused immediately, his concerned eyes flicking up to meet yours.
“too cold love? do you want me to warm it up more between my fingers?” he would stop immediately if you wanted as he cupped the back of your thighand it made you mewl happily.
“no... no it's a good kind of cold… it feels really good already,” you reassured him. your body relaxes back deeper into the pillows as the gel begins to work its magic, dulling any sting that was left helping you so much.
“k-keep going please,” you plead. with your encouragement jungkook nodded, his expression turning back to focused as he used two fingers to spread the gel in massaging motions over the external area of your core so that all the slickness would be absorbed well. he ran his fingers up and down your slit without ever penetrating even though the way you were gaping and were more stretched than before gave him the strong urge to and made him feel heady with desire and the need for more but he couldn't imagine how sensitive you are inside. he was going to keep his promise and he wouldn't even think of touching you until you've fully healed, no matter how long it takes, he can even wait up to weeks if needed. nothing comes before your comfort, not even him. he also already felt extremely guilty for causing you soreness anyways so he was fully meticulous in avoiding going near your entrance, instead tracing the swollen inner folds with patience while his other hand rested on your thigh. his lips curved up at your increasingly relieved noises.
“mmm...” you moaned softly. your clit throbbed noticeably as his fingers drew near it but his fingers skirted around it at first building anticipation instead.
“does that feel better baby? is it helping hm?” his voice had dropped to this deep timbre that always sent shivers through you and makes you wet.
“y-yes,” you squirm, your hand fisting the sheets. he grabs the tube again and adds another squeeze of gel, spreading it lower where your pussy lips met.
“we're going to repeat this a few more times later to help you recover quickly, okay sweet girl?” you nodded bashfully, your heart stuttering as he continued his work and he couldn't get enough of your facial expressions. that focused look where you looked like you were in pain but you were pleased instead. a longer breathier whine leaves you as he finally allows his gel coated fingertip to circle your clit with a little pressure purely meant to soothe it, not to apply any stimulation.
“jungkook h-hahh, right there feels so good… but don't i-i mean.. more please,” you managed to stammer between soft gasps and he chuckled fondly, his fingers never stopping.
“you're gonna get everything you want mama,” another quiet moan leaves you at the endearment, feeling pleasure in a way you've never felt before like you wanted to soak into it forever even if you weren't being brought to any release. he makes sure every single sore spot of yours gets love and attention. he continued applying massages while noting your noises and applying pressure to the place where it makes you moan louder, lifting and separating your swollen folds with his fingertips to reach every hidden crease ensuring the aloe gel coated absolutely everything. your body absolutely surrounded by him.
“mmphh,” you make a muffled noise against the pillow as he flicks your clit once again, your breasts heaving hard which were still exposed. your thighs were starting to shake but he held them gently.
“there... almost done now you're being such a good girl and letting me take care of you,” he coos at you, watching you become a writhing cute mess on the sheets. he wipes away another small trickle of your arousal, cleaning you tenderly before applying fresh gel over the spot. finally satisfied that every area had been thoroughly tended to, jungkook wiped his fingers clean on a nearby towel and you felt almost sad that it was over, you wanted him to keep going. he leans down to press a kiss just above your mound. you squeaked, hips lifting at his sudden action and the way he seemed to just kiss you at your vulnerable places with no shame at all and he smirked before pulling you close to him.
“all done for now baby... yeah? it felt really good?” he rasps as he sees your still blissed out face and a slight pout because he stopped. you were his needy girl. he sat up and reached for the wardrobe, where he pulled out one of his favorite oversized t-shirts, the fabric well worn from how often he wore it at home and right beside his clothes, he opened the smaller drawer that held all your undergarments which he knew by heart now after both of you started sharing the same space. he picked out a soft pair of cotton panties that had a light blue edge.
“i'm choosing what you wear today,” he mutters playfully. he wanted you wrapped in his clothes constantly, though he loved you naked but he loved it even more when you wore his clothes and he had a reason to take it off. he helps you sit up as you smiled shyly back at him as he slipped the t-shirt over your head, first guiding your arms through the sleeves, it brushed against your hard nubs immediately.
“there we go... so damn adorable,” he hums. next he knelt down in front of you on the floor, holding the panties open.
“lift your hips just a little for me.”
you complied with your hands on his shoulder, your heart racing as he carefully settled the panties against your gel coated cunt and he left them like that, saying it would avoid excessive friction when you tried to walk or sit. he adjusted the panty, running his fingers along the edges making sure it's not too tight on you and breathable that's why he chose the cotton ones.
“comfortable enough?” he asked, looking up at you with those intense eyes. you nodded as you couldn't help but reach down to thread your fingers through his hair, the other hand cupping his cheek.
“thank you for being this careful with me koo,” he kissed your knee tenderly before standing up to pull you against him.
“always baby, you're my absolute priority today and every day..” he says warmly as he holds you close, pressing little kisses on your hair.
“now come on, let me get dressed too, i have to feed you soon,” you watched with dazed eyes as he turned around to dress himself as he reached for a pair of boxers and sweatpants, the fabric looked almost too ordinary against the godlike perfection of his body. just as he began to step into the boxers, turning his back fully toward you, the shocking sight made you gasp. you didn't notice it fully before but now with him giving you his back, you could see the long scratches on his upper back and shoulders and half moons caused by your nails, some even looked bloody where you had clutched and dug in desperately during those shattering climaxes he's brought you. the marks trailed low to his waist, it's like he'd been clawed by an animal and you'd been completely out of mind last night to even notice that you were hurting him and he didn't seem to complain once, like he enjoyed it and the pain spurred him further.
“jungkook…” you whispered. you pushed yourself up into a sitting position on the bed. you felt so guilty that tears welled in your eyes as you imagined how much those scratches might be stinging.
“your back… oh god it looks so bad, i'm so sorry—” your voice breaks.
“i didn't realize that i scratched you that much,” he paused mid motion with the sweatpants he held loosely in one hand and glanced over his shoulder at you with a lazy smile, a strand of wet hair falling messily over his forehead as his eyes sparked with mischief.
“hey it's okay baby, i like it.” he lets out a pleased murmur.
“these marks? it means i fucked you good and you marked me angel. i'm actually proud of them,” his words made you weak at the knees but you shook your head firmly.
“no please... it's bloody in some places and the skin looks raw. it must hurt more than you're letting on,” you insisted with genuine worry as you gazed up at him pleadingly.
“you took care of me all morning, now let me do something for you. at least let me care for you too..” you whimper.
“please?” you add when he doesn't reply as your eyes are wide and shimmering as you reach out a hand toward him. he studied your face for a long time, those dark eyes of his softening with understanding, his own heart swelling inside his chest from the way you want to take care of him too. it makes him want to get on his knees because he didn't deserve that one bit but here you were pleading to make it all better for him like no one ever has. it makes him wanna keep you to him forever selfishly and never let you go as his brows furrow at the center.
“you're really worried about me huh?” he takes your hand pressing it against his stomach while he cups one of your cheeks, not being able to help himself as he leans down to peck your lips.
“alright baby.. if it'll make my sweet girl happy, i'll let you play doctor,” he said with a smile, tossing the sweatpants carelessly aside onto the floor. with fluid grace he climbed back into the bed with a groan, the mattress dipping under his muscular weight as he stretched out fully on his stomach. he folded his arms beneath the pillow, turning his head to the side. his body lay displayed before you like a masterpiece. him being closer to you now gave you an even better view of the scratches on his skin and you stared a bit shocked at first. his insane masculinity always seemed to take your breath away and how unbearably handsome he was with such a perfect physique. how was he real? and also the fact that he knew exactly what to do without you telling him, your legs squeezed together slightly beneath his t-shirt.
“come here. i'm all yours to take care of,” he added, his voice muffled slightly by the pillow. the invitation from him makes heat swirl on your belly once more as you try to focus on his scars instead of yourself. if you weren't so sore, you'd probably beg him to fuck you once more. you moved toward him and straddled his hips slowly, your clothed pussy pressing directly against the small of his back. you gasped softly at the feeling of his hard muscle pressing against you even if you're wearing panties, your hands pressing against his back. you gulped nervously, hoping he doesn't notice it but judging by the tension in his body, he probably did and his hard on wasn't willing to go away one bit, the guy was stubborn indeed. a spark of renewed arousal went through you as you took a deep breath and reached for the small white tube of antiseptic cream on the bedside table that was halfway finished from you using it on him when he was injured from the accident. he has healed perfectly well since then and didn't need it anymore but the cream stayed there after you forgot to remove it. you squeezed a small amount on your finger.
“i'm going to apply this to the cuts so it doesn't cause any infections okay?” you croon.
“hmm whatever you think works well baby,” he nods. you leaned forward, your breasts brushing on his back as you slowly began to apply the cream on the raised areas. you started with the long angry line that goes down his back, spreading it slowly, a sad whimper leaving you as you noticed a bit of blood starting to build up.
“i-i'm so sorry again, i didn't wanna—” your words were interrupted by him.
“mama if you apologize once more, i'm gonna spank that ass red so you match with me, do you want that?” he turns his head to look at you with one of his brows raised, his eyes softening when he sees the worry in your eyes.
“keep going okay? your hands feel so nice on me baby, i don't need any apologies,” he encouraged softly. you bite your lower lip and continue smoothing the ointment into the inflamed areas as jungkook hums with contentment that vibrates through his entire body up into your straddling pussy. the sound was so rich and manly, it made you weak in the knees. you leaned even closer, his noises motivating you further as you tended to a particularly deep mark. you couldn't help but lean down to press a kiss on the scratch where you didn't apply the ointment yet.
“y/n,” he breathes out your name so wantonly at your kiss that your entire body reacts. you placed another kiss on another of the scratches you left before applying more medicine and tending to him with your kisses that he seems to like. your fingers went lower, spreading the cream near his waist that allowed you to feel every ridge. you straddled him more securely to get better access lost in taking care of him, your pussy pressed more firmly against him and it sent a slight friction that made your movements falter, a wet spot forming on your panties already and the aloe that was already there on your heat made everything extra slick. looking at the deepest scratch of his reminded you of when that happened when he'd finally put his cock inside you all the way inside, bulging your stomach and the other one that occurred when he'd started pounding you and making you cum so quick that you couldn't help but grab at him while overwhelmed with sensations.
“i got so distracted...” you whispered between kisses along the red lines, your tongue comes out to trace a line near his stomach.
“fuck,” he lets out a muffled growl.
“i didn't even know i was marking you like this... but knowing you like them makes me feel a little better.”
“and i loved every second of it,” he affirms quietly as your fingers worked diligently over the lower marks, his body shifting subtly beneath you at the attention.
“your nails digging into me, your legs wrapped so tight around my waist like you never wanted me to pull out… shit… you drive me crazy you know that?” you shiver hard against him, your body melting into him fully until you are hugging him from behind and he yanks you close by the back of your thighs until there is not a single space between you both, fully merged together. you meanwhile, finished with the final mark. you smoothed the cream one last time, making sure all the cuts were covered then capped the tube and set it aside. you chose instead to stay exactly where you were, leaning down to rest your cheek against his shoulder as both of you breathed together. he grabbed your hand, interlacing it with his big one, the desire of pleasure and adoration mixing together like the perfect blend. you both didn't have to talk to show it but your bodies did. skin to skin, heartbeat to heartbeat, with the peacefulness of the morning. pure love and sex. lots of it.
“thank you angel,” he lets out huskily. you placed one final kiss to a fading scratch, holding him tighter and he knew everything you ever wanted to say, everything you had in your heart for him and he knew that he was the luckiest man alive to have you. he stroked the back of your thigh absentmindedly holding onto each other like you had all the time in the world. after a while more of soaking into each other, jungkook decided to take you to the kitchen and yes of course, he carried you to the kitchen once again, you joked about how long he would be carrying you and he said that he wouldn't mind doing it for the rest of his life. you were scared that he wasn't joking at all. he now stood at the stove, his broad back at you, wearing nothing but only a pair of loose black sweatpants and shirtless, he has put his hair in a man bun already after blow drying it. the first thing he always does right after waking up is make your coffee and he's already handed you a cup. the smell of butter reached your nose as he stirred the pancake batter. he moved with confidence, flipping the pancake. he was probably the only man you've seen who held such practiced ease when it came to his work life and also when it came to household chores. seeing how caring and attentive he was made you feel emotional because he proved that the stereotype that men don’t cook or clean isn’t true. you sat at the kitchen island on a stool and you shifted slightly. hard surfaces made you ache, every movement reminded you of how he'd filled you so well.
“baby are you okay sitting there?” jungkook asked, glancing over his shoulder.
“if it's too much, i can bring everything to the couch. i don't want you hurting more than you already do,” that was who he was, knowing your discomfort without even saying anything.
“i'm fine koo, it's okay... just a little soreness,” but he didn't look convinced at all so he brought a cushion for you and finally felt relaxed, then he plated the breakfast into two plates, yours holding the most fruits because he knows you love them and sat beside you turning to cup your cheek.
“good sore or bad sore?”
“good one… you made me feel better,” you whispered and leaned into his touch. jungkook pressed a peck against your lips, his tongue tracing the seam of your mouth before slipping away, his hand gripping your thigh.
“eat first. i made your favorite and extra berries because i know you like the sweetness… after everything,” he pulled back reluctantly, adjusting himself with a groan. he knew you were hungry and wanted you to eat before he just kept touching and kissing you to his fill. you picked up the fork and took a bite of the pancake.
“mmm this is amazing koo. you didn't have to do all this.”
“of course i did,” he murmured. his one hand stayed on your back while the other fed himself. every few bites he'd lean in to nuzzle against you. as you ate, bam padded into the kitchen, his tail wagging excitedly at the smell and jungkook chuckled warmly.
“hey buddy, you hungry too?” he reached down to scratch bam's ears and then cut a small piece of pancake and offered it to the dog who took it happily from his fingers. you giggled softly, reaching down as well to pet him.
“come here bamie, good boy,” you fed him a berry as well and bam licked your palm, his nose nudging your knee and you cooed and rubbed his back. jungkook watched with a fond smile, his hand now resting higher on your thigh, thumb brushing the edge of your pussy accidentally, making you gasp.
“careful,” you breathed.
“still so sensitive there.”
“fuck sorry,” he didn't pull away entirely, instead letting his fingers rest innocently while he ate.
“i can't keep my hands off you but i promise i'm behaving mostly,” he gruffs out smugly. you scoffed, trying hard to keep up with both the needy boys' attention while you tried to finish eating. the time unfolded like that in the domestic intimacy and his care, he couldn't stop touching you and carried you from the kitchen to the couch, settling you against his chest under a soft blanket. bam curled up beside you after he finished having his own food too but you couldn't help but give him more treats. hours passed like that, lazy conversations about nothing and everything. your cheeks reddened whenever you felt bam's eyes on you with jungkook being touchy but he seemed completely at ease now like he was very used to it. bam was used to seeing both his parents together and in fact, it overjoyed him seeing his favorite humans together. just you, him and bam and everything was perfect.
it was late in the afternoon now. the tv's volume was turned down, that none of you were paying attention to. it was a comforting sound in the background and the occasional rustle of blankets that was draped over your intertwined bodies. jungkook was nestled against you, his big frame molded between you, his head resting heavily yet comfortingly on your breasts using them as his personal pillows as one of his strong arms was slung across your waist holding onto you. his hand cupped the underside of one breast tenderly, almost in an attempt to support its full weight as if it were something precious, his other hand caressing your bare skin under his shirt, feeling your breasts rise and fall with your quick breaths.
“mm... these are my favorite pillows in the whole world,” jungkook murmurs against you. he turned his head, pressing an open mouthed kiss to the generous curve of one breast, his tongue coming out to trace along the fabric leaving it wet with his saliva as goosebumps erupt all over you with anticipation.
“so soft… and full, i could stay here forever… mm… just like this.. buried in you,” he nuzzled further into your breasts and you let out a giggle at his words, biting your lower lip.
“you're acting like a baby right now...” you whisper beside his ear.
“your baby? fuck yes,” he grunts approvingly. your fingers threaded deeply into his hair as you began to absentmindedly massage it but when you noticed that he seemed to enjoy it a little too much, you turned your full attention to him. your nails grazed a little at first before pressing in with more intention, scratching slightly in the contours of his skull. the sensation elicited an immediate profound response from him, his entire body melting into yours like putty and his deep growl sends shivers through you as well.
“koo… does that feel good?” you asked as a smile played on your lips continuing your ministrations, enjoying the feel of the big brooding ceo being a mess on your breasts from your attention as both his arms wrap tighter around your waist pulling you fully into him. your fingers tugged gently at the roots that seemed to unravel him completely, watching as his eyelids fluttered and his lips parted in ecstasy.
“yeah...” he groaned throatily, feeling the rawness he only ever showed you in these private moments.
“don't stop,” your hands in his hair drive him crazy every time it feels like you're pulling all the tension out of him. he rubbed his face side to side almost like a cat inhaling your scent greedily as if you were the oxygen he lived for, his loose hair now thoroughly tousled and tangled from your loving attention. every precise scratch of your nails made his back arch subtly and his hips shift beneath the blanket as his body grew heavier with each passing second but he didn't put his entire weight on you, knowing how tiny you are and even if you're doing better, he knows your body is still weak. his fingers ran over your belly beneath the shirt, stroking the skin there exploring and squeezing your softness and the curve of your hips.
“i love every inch of you,” he said quietly. he just can't get enough of your tits, he'd happily die being squished between them. his head shifted, turning to capture one nipple through the fabric, sucking into it and you were so hard that the nub was prodding out very well for him to suck onto it, his tongue circling around.
“ahh…” you squealed sharply at his sudden action, your head falling back causing more of your breast to press into his eager mouth. even with having a barrier of fabric between you both, it made everything so intense.
“koo,” you whined, the words holding no true protest as your fingers tightened in his hair pulling him even closer. he released your nipple with an obscene pop, lifting his gaze to meet yours with his half lidded gleaming eyes.
“i just wanted to feel you, taste you a little… i've been thinking about these pretty tits all day,” he reassures though his actions spoke otherwise as your lips part, lost in sensations too. his tongue flicked out again to circle the hard peak before it switched to the other breast, lavishing it with the same attention pulling the nipple between his tongue in a way that makes your toes curl tightly.
“uh… mmm.” you moan feeling everything heightened.
“y-you're so obsessed with them,” you teased as you kept playing with his hair, tugging more causing another delicious moan to leave him as he stopped sucking your nipple and rested his head on one of them instead.
“obsessed with every part of you,” he corrected reverently. he knew he'd lose control if he pulled your shirt up to reveal your breasts to his eyes so he had his fill with just this instead, feeling you respond to his mouth. his hand rested on your ass cheek, just a warm pressure rather than a demand not being able to help himself, his cock pressed down on the couch searching for friction desperately from the blue balls he had from ignoring his hard on since the morning. instead his hips rolled forward, letting you feel his hard insistent length against your thigh without pressing it against your sensitivity.
“feel that?” he asks.
“that's what you do to me just lying here with your tits in my face… i'm so fucking hard for you baby,” his voice breaks. you reached down between your bodies with eager fingers now that he's not stopping you because you wanted him to feel good too. you didn't like how much he was holding himself back for you, you could at least provide him a little relief. you wrapped your hand around his clothed erection feeling how he was pulsing and rock hard as you stroked him with a squeeze, feeling the wetness of his precum soaking through. he groaned as if you made him cum and his groan ended in a small whimper that was so sexy that it made your thighs tremble around his body and he gave a suckle on your nipple once again in gratitude, leaving two wet patches on the shirt.
“like this?” you asked softly, continuing the strokes that drew more noises from him.
“god yes, just like that baby,” he panted against your chest.
“your hands feel incredible,” he had never been so desperate but last night having you and denying himself anything while having you close today, touching your sensitive places had left him wanton. the minutes seemed to pass like that with occasional sucking and stroking, rubbing his face between your pillowy breasts while you play with his hair. your own arousal was starting to build feeling your clit throb but he remained so sweetly restrained. eventually when he couldn't take it anymore, his hips started to rock into your fist and after a while he remove your hand gently, not wanting to cross the boundaries he promised today. he was happy to just have you close. he also realized that you were getting tired, a yawn leaving you as you settled against him, sinking further in the coziness from the movements and the low lighting. jungkook lifted his head to place a kiss against your cheek which you returned with purr like noise making him chuckle warmly.
“getting sleepy my angel?” he whispered.
“mhm no...” you murmured trying your best for him to stay awake and not leave him hanging but your eyes were fluttering closed.
“shh… get some sleep love. i got you,” he waited a few more minutes, forgetting about his erection as you slept deeply and so peacefully before he cradled you against him and carried you slowly upwards toward your shared bedroom so your sleep doesn't get disturbed. he laid you down, watching you sleep with a smile before placing a lingering kiss against your forehead.
the next morning you and jungkook were in the kitchen once again. you were in front of the coffee machine while his body was pressed close behind you, arms wrapped around you fingers stroking your thigh under the shorts you wore. every brush of his fingertips made your breath hitch lightly. jungkook nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck, pressing a kiss there, making you smell the mint in his breath from when he'd brushed his teeth earlier. he couldn't stop holding you, being clingy and you loved every second of it as you turned your head meeting his gaze.
“kook… what about your work today?” he chuckled lowly.
“work can wait for two days. my wife's more important, especially after...” his fingers dipped lower.
“how's my girl feeling today?” his tone was concerned making your heart squeeze.
“i'm okay… doing much better,” you whisper. you were in fact doing so much better, the soreness was now reduced to sensitivity and he made the effort of applying aloe gel once again before you slept last night and throughout the night you felt like it did its job. it was all because of him. before you could say more, a knock echoed, mrs. kim had arrived for her usual duties as she let herself in with the spare key. she came inside the kitchen with fresh groceries, a bright grin on her face as she took in the sight of both of you. jungkook didn't pull away, instead he stayed glued against you with not a single care, his hand still rubbing circles on your thigh.
“good morning mr. and mrs. jeon. happy to see you both here,” she said cheerfully in her usual maternal tone. jungkook grinned, leaning in to press a kiss against your neck right there in front of her, his hand squeezing your thigh firmly.
“wouldn't miss a day with her. look at my wife mrs. kim. isn't she glowing?” his breath fanned over your ear.
mrs. kim laughed warmly, “oh she sure is the most beautiful,” he shifted subtly, pressing his bulge against your hip from behind. it wasn't noticeable if someone else saw it from afar but you felt it proper and clear making your eyes widen. you gasped, pushing hard against his chest but he wouldn't budge. you looked at mrs. kim with wide eyes, who was already busy unpacking the vegetables.
“jungkook! not in front of mrs. kim…” but he kept you pressed against him, a chuckle leaving him, both of you in a distance where she won't be able to hear you.
“she knows we're married, let me love on you,” you squirmed embarrassed even though her attention was diverted, pressing a hand against his chest.
“koo behave.”
“can't. you're too tempting,” as his bulge pressed against you harder, his hips gave a subtle roll, you finally broke out of his hold with red cheeks but an excitement in your eyes as you huffed and started walking upstairs and he followed you like a lost puppy. mrs. kim smiled to herself as she worked.
“young love...”
but she knew that this young love would last between the both of you for several years to come and she prayed that's how it would always remain.
you and jungkook had a light breakfast and then you decided to spend some time in the home library he'd built for you, reading a book with him by your side watching you with soft eyes. he loves seeing you happy here. he'd also handled some important work calls that he received from his office. after he finishes his recent call, he walks to you.
“i need to work out a bit,” he murmurs against your mouth.
“haven't done it properly in a couple of days. doors open for you yeah? you can come whenever you want,” his thumb stroked your cheek.
“don't stay away too long okay?”
you nodded as he kissed you once more, sucking onto your bottom lip before releasing it with a pop. he stood up stretching his arms, causing the hem of his t-shirt to ride up, letting you see the v-line of and you gulped.
“see you baby,” he added with a smirk and you blushed, knowing his intentions too well. you continued reading for a while more but after a few minutes you couldn’t focus and couldn’t stop thinking of his invitation. you wandered around the house, feeling the persistent throb of want between your legs, not knowing what to do and mrs. kim has left as well after finishing her chores. so you decided to visit jungkook. you grabbed a cold bottle of water from the fridge and a fresh white towel of his from the closet and padded down the hallway. you stopped at the open doorway of the home gym, standing at a distance but you could see him clearly from here. jungkook was in the middle of intense pushups, shirtless now as his body glistened with sweat, his muscles flexing hard with every rise, veins standing out as he gripped the weights next. you could also see the shape of his cock beneath his pants and the bulge of him. you felt a jolt of arousal at the sight, your thighs squeezing together, almost immediately heat was all over you. you shifted on your feet watching him transfixed and shocked at how effortlessly he moved those heavy dumbbells. you completely forgot that you might be caught staring at him. jungkook paused mid rep, his eyes catching yours in the mirror. a slow knowing smirk spread across his face, sweat dripping down his jaw as he set the weights down and turned toward you, his chest heaving with exertion.
“hey baby.”
“couldn't stay away huh? come here,” he wiped his forehead with the back of his hand and you stepped closer, holding out the cold water bottle and towel with a racing heart.
“thought you might need these,” you replied.
“thanks love,” he twisted the cap off and tilted his head back, drinking as you watched with parted lips the way his adam's apple bobbed up and down, some droplets of water escaping the corner of his mouth trailing down his neck. he finished half the bottle in one go, letting out a satisfied grunt and wiping his mouth with the towel you offered, his eyes never leaving yours. he looks so masculine doing it. his hand comes up to cup the back of your neck, thumb stroking the skin there.
“bringing me water like a good wife…” he didn't give you any time to react, he suddenly scooped you up with ease and carried you to the weight bench nearby.
“sit here.”
he said settling you down on the edge of the bench, your shorts riding up high as you settled, the material stretching over the curve of your ass and molding to the shape of your pussy making you acutely aware of how wet you were getting from jungkook's presence and his words. his eyes darkened as he noticed, his tongue darting out to wet his lips. he could see everything, your shorts highlight the shape of your pussy lewdly and he couldn't help but adjust himself balantly in his pants while he pretended to not notice it. he went back to his workout. now that you were here watching him, he felt more confident and better. each rep made his abs twitch and his back muscles contract where your scratches were but have started healing. you couldn't help but focus on his lower portion of the body and did you ever mention how attractive his butt was too? so muscular in its own way and he just looked so grabble, his pants were molded tight against his butt and his bulge tenting his prominently that he made no effort in hiding. he was enjoying it too, you could tell by the way his eyes kept flicking to you in the mirror, that smug look still on his face. though he made no comments and continued doing his thing wanting your eyes on him, feeling himself strong and desired with just your eyes alone. he did a few more pushups, his chest heaving as he sweated even more, his pants sliding down a bit to reveal his tempting v-line that you can never get enough of and the happy trail of hair. his biceps and arms were pumped to their absolute limits, veins looking like they might just burst as he picked up the heaviest lifts. he used it for a few seconds before settling them down with a loud noise as you watched, shocked because a normal man would probably break his arm picking that up. he stood up to his full height panting, pushing out the stray hair that had fallen out of his man bun. his hooded eyes found yours, locking in such an intense way that your pussy responded with a hard throb. the smirk deepened as he reached for the towel once again to wipe the sweat away from his face and neck and even that act seemed sensual to you as you watched his abs contract and his hard cock which was now fully visible, growing fuller by the second under your stare.
“like what you see?” he murmurs, laced with equal parts of heat and amusement as he tosses the damp towel aside, letting it land in a heap on the floor and takes a step closer toward you. the sheer power he exerted made you heady and the addictive scent of sweat and clean male.
“you've been watching me the entire time haven't you? tell me sweetheart, do you like it? because i'm hard as fuck knowing you're sitting there with that wet little pussy pressed against the bench,” he lets out a growl. you gasped at his words, your eyes falling on your fidgeting hands, desperately trying to avert your eyes from him and his delicious body but it was utterly impossible and you knew exactly how fixed his eyes were on your legs clenched together.
“i... i just wanted to bring you some water,” you let out an excuse, squirming under his stare. jungkook lets out a low chuckle as he closed the remaining distance in one fluid motion.
“sure you did but your eyes were glued to my arms... my chest… lower,” he reached out large hands, gripping your waist firmly and he pulled you flush against him, your body pressing against his sweaty one though it didn't bother you one bit, it turned you on further. his cock nestled tight against your lower belly as he held you close, his hand sliding beneath your tiny tank top.
“look at me,” he whispered, breathing hotly against your lips. as you looked up to face him, he captured your mouth in a deep kiss that stole the air from your lungs. his tongue slides inside your mouth, tangling with yours doing the sex act with his tongue that makes your sock clad feet wrap around his waist. you could taste the saltiness of his sweat too, your hands coming up to clutch at his broad shoulders as he nibbles on your bottom lip making you moan against his mouth that he swallows. his hand squeezed and kneaded your ass cheek pulling you even tighter against his erection, grinding you down onto it, both of you letting out shared groans. he broke the kiss after what felt like an eternity, trailing his lips along the line of your jaw biting suddenly making you whimper then soothing the bite with the swipe of his tongue.
“fuckk i love how you feel on me like this,” he groaned deeply. he pulled you onto his lap making you straddle him on the bench, your core settling directly over his massive bulge now only thin fabrics separating you both.
“mmph,” you mewled as his hands groped you wherever he could while he nuzzled into the crook of your shoulder, pressing little kisses.
“does it bother you that i'm all sweaty and worked up princess?” he murmured into your ear, tongue coming out to lap at your earlobe making you shiver and grab his shoulder harder. he licks a long stripe with his tongue from your jaw to your neck making your entire body shake.
“or does it turn you on ever more? knowing your husband pushed himself so hard here and all i could think about the whole time was coming back to this tight pussy and make it feel so fucking good mm?” you sobbed at his words also at the way his hand comes out to possessively cup you over your shorts, the heel of his palm pressing there, he slips it to the side to reveal your panties already soaked through and clinging to your folds.
“j-jungkook..”
he lets out an appreciative noise as he helps you get out of your shorts before pushing the panty to the side using two fingers running them along your slit, gathering the wetness and spreading it upward over your clit.
“uh...” you crooned. your back arched in his lap, it felt so good when he touched you unrestrained since he knew you were no longer too sore as he continued his exploration, thumb pressing against your clit rubbing the bud slowly while he groped your breasts, the impatience in him making you moan louder. he pulled your tank top down to make your breasts bounce out, a satisfied growl leaving him because you didn't wear any bra and latched onto one nipple while his fingers tweaked the other one like he was so hungry for it because he couldn't focus on your breasts yesterday with the barrier of his shirt. his fingers slide up and down your dripping folds too, dipping just barely into your entrance before retreating to rub tight circles around your clit, leaving your hips chasing his fingers grinding down against his cock. jungkook pulled back slightly as he gazed down at your expression.
“i love eating this sweet pussy more than anything. i wanna eat it right now.” he snarls.
“do it… please.”
“yeah? want me to devour this cunt?” he questions huskily and you nod frantically, your legs parting even more for him. he shifted you higher, repositioning you on the bench so he could bend down between your legs watching your pussy clench for him. he licked a long stripe from your entrance to your clit making you cry out, your thighs shaking around his head as he lapped at your juices, he hummed into you.
“unnghhh… hnnngh…” you keened at the way he eats at you like he was starving. he held you, spreading his hands on your ass cheeks as he devoured you completely using rapid targeted movements on your clit, this time penetrating you with his tongue making your hips press hard into his mouth.
“still aching inside baby?” he asked during a brief pause, breath hitting against your soaked pussy.
“n-no i w-want you inside.. please,” you plead desperately.
“mhm?” he coaxed you using two of his fingers teasing at your entrance, circling your slit waiting for your consent as he continued to lick and suck with devotion. when you whimpered loudly, did he finally slide one finger in but oh so slowly, curling it upward taking his time to not intentionally hurt your still battered pussy while his mouth lavished attention on your clit.
“yes! right-right there nngh!” he lets out a snarl at your words adding a second finger shortly after, not wasting time and wanting you to come to the satisfying release you've wanted after losing your virginity. he gently pumps both his fingers, always monitoring your reactions as he brought you closer and closer to the edge. your hips started rolling into his fingers grinding down into it and he encouraged it by moving your hips.
“that's it such a good girl. use my fingers,” he watched you take his fingers deeper with lust all over his face, your moans growing dirtier and louder as the pleasure built and how he seemed to curl his fingers whenever you ground down. he also does this twisting motion with his fingers that makes you sob out.
“you like it when i twist my fingers angel?”
“yes—yes—yes—” your voice breaks on a sob as his nose rubs against you too, making everything slick and messy.
“i-i'm so close koo,” you squealed out, fingers gripping onto his hair as you felt like you might pass out. having his fingers a while after he gave you his cock made everything so much more intense.
“cum for me, give me every last drop,” he urged you commandingly as he sucked harder on your clit and pumped his fingers faster but still being careful.
“ohh!” a cry left you as the orgasm washed over you. your entire body trembles, pussy pulsing and clenching around his fingers while you gush onto his eager tongue.
“fuck yes,” he lapped every bit of your release like he was dying for it, his fingers slowing but remaining buried inside you to prolong every spasm until you were fully boneless and murmuring his name constantly. he continued licking you through the aftershocks, cleaning the clear liquid that you'd spurted out without overwhelming you further. finally so slowly, he withdrew his glistening fingers, bringing them up to his mouth to suck them clean too while maintaining eye contact with you.
“mhm… i could eat this pussy all day long.”
he stood up bringing you on his arms, letting you come back down to him, letting you catch your breath, his heart pounding as he watched the dazed smile on your face.
“you did so good for me,” he fills you with praises until you feel it on every corner of your body.
at night the same day you both lay tangled under the sheets, you were flush against his chest one of his strong arms wrapped around your waist, your legs intertwined, and his hand rubbing up and down your arm soothingly. his thigh was between your legs, keeping you fully cuddled in him.
“you okay baby?” he murmurs as he realizes that you're deep in thought, not falling asleep. you signed into his chest, your hand coming up to grip his shirt. you paused gathering your thoughts when he waited for you to speak up.
“jungkook... mrs. han called me today,” he hummed in acknowledgement, tilting his head down so his eyes could meet yours.
“yeah? what did she say?” he asked as his hand stroked your back comfortingly as you took a deep breath, your fingers tracing on his chest as you spoke.
“she asked how i was doing… how we were doing. actually she knew about the accident and everything that happened between us. she sounded really worried at first but i told her i'm okay now, better than okay,” you smiled faintly, lifting your gaze to his.
“she misses me at the bookstore, things are not the same without me there. i.. i told her i miss it too, the smell of books, helping people find books. i've been home since your accident and our argument a-and it feels like i've been hiding away from that part of my life...”
jungkook's eyes softened instantly in understanding as he shifted to pull you even closer to him and cupped your cheek with one hand, thumb brushing tenderly over your lower lip.
“baby… you've been through so much. i know that job means a lot to you, it was your independence before everything got so messed up,” he knew how important your job is to you and how much of an anchor it was even before marrying him. you nodded, feeling a lump in your throat.
“i wanna go back koo, not full time maybe at first but... i miss feeling normal, not just... being here all the time even though i love being with you,” your voice grew nervous.
“after the accident and our fight i kind of shut everything out but talking to her today made me realize how much i want that back,” he was silent for a moment just holding you, increasing your anxiety even more but he finally leans down to press a kiss against your forehead reverently.
“look at me...”
he tipped your chin up with his finger to make you meet his eyes properly.
“you don't need my permission for any of that okay? not ever in this marriage, it's not about me controlling you or keeping you locked away, i want you happy. if going back to the bookstore does that then so be it. i'll support you however you need,” he felt bad because you even thought that you needed to ask for something that's completely up to you and he'd never ever stop you from doing what you love or snatch away your freedom like the bastard of your father tried to. he wanted you happy and would support all of your decisions. even if he absolutely wouldn't mind letting you stay at home if you wanted that as well and didn't wanna work, he'd spoil you endlessly but it's completely up to you and he'd happily support whatever decision you made.
“just promise me you'll let me be there for you?” you felt tears prick at your eyes not from sadness but from the safety his words provided. how being loved by him didn't feel like being in a cage but like getting new wings as a wounded bird to fly high.
“thank you,” you whispered, hand curling tighter on his chest.
“i was nervous to bring it up… i didn't know how you'd feel about me leaving the house once again,” jungkook chuckled as he rolled you gently onto your back hovering partially over you, one hand propping him up as he cupped your cheek.
“nervous?” he teased lightly but his eyes were full of love, not mockery.
“baby i'm so proud of you. you've come so far and yeah, i love having you here… but i fell for the girl who loves her books and her freedom. don't lose that okay?”
“we'll figure out the balance together,” a teary laugh left you, pulling him down for another kiss, your legs wrapping loosely around one of his. your tears falling onto the kiss, your heart feeling like it might burst. you never thought you'd have a man like him in your life as he wiped your tears away murmuring comforting words against your lips. that he'd forever be there being the supportive pillar for you to achieve everything you've wanted and you believed so with every bit of your heart.
the next morning you both were still glued to each other even though the sun had risen. jungkook's warm chest pressed against your back as he spooned you holding you like he never wanted to let go, his breaths falling on your neck, his one leg draped over you and the morning wood he had pressed against your back. he nuzzled closer when he felt you move and placed a kiss on your shoulder.
“mmm baby... don't move yet,” he murmurs.
“just five more minutes…”
he didn't wanna let you go so soon and you both had discussed wanting to get back to work together again and he dreaded it immediately. you smiled sleepily, turning your head slightly to meet his sleepy gaze.
“koo… we have to get up eventually,” you whispered but your body betrayed you, sinking deeper into his arms. his hand freely slid higher to cup your thigh.
“i know. i know,” he groaned, playfully pressing a kiss to the side of your neck sucking a mark.
“but how am i supposed to let you go to work when all i want is to keep you right here mhmm?” his hips rolled forward once slowly letting you feel his hard cock nestle between your ass cheeks, making you let out a long gasp. not pushing for more, just savoring the closeness. you turned fully in his arms, facing him now as your hands roamed on his chest. he kissed you then, his tongue teased yours while his fingers threaded through your hair, none of you seemed to pull away first as the kiss grew more heated with nips and sighs until the breathlessness made you pull back. reluctantly after many more whispered protests and kisses.
“just one more,” he'd say each time. you both finally started to get up and get ready. jungkook sat on the edge of the bed, running a hand through his messy hair watching you with a lazy smile as you moved around the room. you picked out one of your favorite dark suits on him, laying it out for him to wear.
“this one.” you said.
“you look so handsome in it,” he pulled you between his legs, hands on your hips, resting his forehead against your stomach.
“only because you choose it for me,” he started getting ready, buttoning up his shirt while he stole kisses from your lips as you both got dressed side by side. when it came to the tie, he didn't have to call for you as you naturally stood up on your tiptoes to tie it and he watched your focused expression with adoration, hands resting on your waist.
“you're spoiling me.” he murmurs.
“i don't deserve this you know?”
“you do.” you huffed your reply, adjusting the knot perfectly then smoothing it down his chest like you always did since the first day. he caught your hands, kissing your knuckles one by one, lingering on the promise ring that you never took off. playfulness took over as he tugged you onto his side making you giggle.
“jungkook!” but he only pressed his face against your neck making you squirm, both your laughter erupting and his hands roaming on your back, squeezing your ass affectionately.
“can’t stop thinking about how tight you were that night… how you moaned my name when i bottomed out,” he lets out a grunt.
“we'll be late,” you gasped even though his words made your legs tremble a bit.
“finee,” he reluctantly agreed with an exaggerated tone on the word making you grin. you both headed out and jungkook drove with one hand on the wheel, the other holding your thigh. he had dismissed the driver saying he wanted to drive you there himself. he also decided to buy breakfast outside as he pulled up to your favorite cafe drivethru, ordering without hesitation, your favorite latte and the pastry you like. he had it memorized perfectly. when he paid pulling out his wallet for the card, you caught a glimpse inside, a small candid photo of you smiling softly from the sunny beach day at the maldives. you didn't say anything but your eyes glistened with sudden happy tears. you hadn’t cried much lately and when you did in his presence, it was never from fear or pain anymore. only joy. only love. you blinked quickly, not saying anything but the realization hit you deeply... he carried you with him everywhere. the drive to the library was peaceful, his hand brushing your thigh and he kept glancing at you. at the library, jungkook walked you inside himself. immediately visitors and staff gawked at him with wide eyes because of the aura jungkook carried. mrs. han looked up from the counter, a smile on her face with happiness at seeing you together like this.
“mrs. han,” jungkook nodded politely.
“i’m bringing her back today. take good care of my wife yeah?” she nodded, beaming.
“of course.”
he then turned to you, not caring that there were other people looking and pulled you close.
“have the best day baby,” he cupped your face, kissing you and you whimpered into his mouth when you heard gasps from others around as they pretended to not look. he pulled back slightly, placing another peck thumb stroking your cheek.
“text me if you need anything. i will pick you up later if you want,” you blushed furiously but smiled.
“i will… drive safe.”
he lingered for a moment longer, forehead pressing against yours before stepping back and you felt the sudden coldness in his absence. your time in the library passed with distracted focus. you felt great being back to your usual routine of moving through the stacks of books and arranging them and helping the customers find books, though in every quiet moment you stood there smiling to yourself as you thought about jungkook and every little moment spent with him. that you missed him already even if you didn't want to admit that. mrs. han approached you, patting your arm.
“i'm so glad you're back dear. you seem happier, everything is going well right?” she asked worriedly. you smiled shyly and nodded.
“i am, really happier than ever,” and mrs. han believed so with the look on your face that you were indeed the happiest. after a few hours of working you just couldn't stay still, your thoughts kept drifting to him making your chest tight with longing. it had only been a few hours since he left for the office but his kisses were still branded on you, the way his forehead had lingered on yours before he reluctantly pulled away played on repeat in your mind. without informing him, you decided it was time for a surprise as you told mrs. han with nervous excitement that you'll be taking an early leave which she allowed with a knowing smile of hers. you've never been to his office before so you were taking a bold move by doing it yourself. you grabbed your bag and headed out, finding the usual driver of jungkook's that has been there driving you around even before the bond between you and jungkook started forming, he was a kind respectful man.
“could you take me to jungkook's office please?”
“of course mrs. jeon. it'll be my pleasure,” he nodded with a bow. the drive to the office had you shifting in your seat with anticipation and overthinking, how would he react? would he possibly be mad? no that's not jungkook at all, he'd rather hurt himself than become angry at you. your thighs pressed together subtly from the passionate nights spent together with him. how he had left you wanting more and your heart was racing, you missed him. by the time the car pulled up to the high modern company, you stepped out feeling a bit out of place in such a luxurious big place. you stepped inside and approached the front desk. the woman behind the counter looked up at you with a professional smile.
“good afternoon. how may i help you?”
“i'm y/n, i'm here to see my husband jeon jungkook,” the woman's eyes widened slightly in recognition but she hesitated, her fingers hovering over the phone.
“do you have an appointment ma'am? mr. jeon is quite busy today and we usually require prior notice for visitors,” her words carried a tone that made your stomach twist with insecurity, though you held your ground. before you could respond, she picked up the phone and dialed speaking in a hushed tone. it was as if she were used to different women coming here in an attempt to meet jungkook so she didn't trust you easily. you watched, assuming the conversation shifted quickly because her face paled. you couldn't hear everything but the change in her expression was immediate.
“what do you mean you're stopping her? that's my wife, how dare you question her right to be here?” you caught fragments of his angry voice as the woman started stammering.
“i'm sorry mr. jeon. i didn't realize... yes of course, right away,” she hung up turning to you with wide eyes, looking at you like she's almost about to cry.
“i'm terribly sorry mrs. jeon. please go right up the private elevator to the top floor,” you felt a flush on your cheeks at the way jungkook had defended you so fiercely claiming you as his wife, it made you feel protected and cherished in his world. he never saw you below him like men with huge status does, he saw you like his equal. with a soft “thank you,” you made your way to the private elevator and waited until it dinged open to jungkook's private domain that no one was allowed to. as you stepped further inside, your eyes landed on a familiar figure on the couch near the windows. taehyung was dressed in a grey suit as he casually scrolled on his phone, one arm draped over the back of the couch like it was his place too. the last time you had seen him in the hospital room where he had revealed painful truths and donated blood to save jungkook, it was full of tension.. everything felt so heavy, now the atmosphere was entirely different. taehyung looked up, genuine surprise on his face after seeing you before it softened, he stood up slowly pocketing his phone.
“hey… it's you y/n.” he said.
“didn't expect to see you here today. jungkook didn't mention you were coming,” you offered a small shy smile, your fingers twisting the hem of your blouse nervously as you approached. he didn't look as intimidating as he did at the hospital.
“hi taehyung, yeah um.. it was a last minute decision,” your heart pounded, not being used to another man's presence without jungkook around and he was in his office where you wanted to go.
“yeah the accident feels like ages ago now but i'm glad things are looking so much better between you both...”
he chuckled lightly, easing some of the awkwardness.
“he's in his office finishing up a call, he should be out any second,” just then the door to the inner office opened and jungkook emerged, the sleeve of his dress shirt rolled up and his expression shifted from focused to pure joy the moment his eyes landed on you.
“baby..” he breathed. he crossed the room in long strides, pulling you into his arms immediately as he buried his face in your hair, inhaling like he was dying of you making your knees weak.
“you came. fuck i missed you already. why didn't you tell me? i would've cleared everything or picked you up,” you melted into his chest, your arms wrapping around his waist almost forgetting about taehyung's presence for a bit as you laughed softly against his chest.
“i wanted to surprise you. it wasn't planned... i hope i'm not interrupting,” jungkook pulled back just enough to cup your face with both hands.
“interrupt? never, you're the best part of my day,” he leaned in, pressing a peck against your lips, his tongue coming out to take a deeper taste but both of you get interrupted with taehyung clearing his throat with an amused grin, watching the exchange.
“alright lovebirds, i can take a hint. i was just dropping off some papers anyways, you two clearly need some time alone.”
he grabbed his jacket from the couch, slinging it over his shoulder.
“it was good seeing you again y/n,” he said to you sincerely, his voice carrying warmth and no coldness that was once directed at you because he's learned that whatever you felt for jungkook was true and that you both belonged together.
“jungkook's been smiling more these days because of you.”
jungkook kept one arm securely around your waist, not letting go even as he addressed his friend.
“thanks for coming by tae. we'll catch up soon. finish up the meeting but yeah… right now i need my wife,” he rasps. the words make heat spread all over you. taehyung laughed, already heading towards the elevator.
“message received loud and clear.”
he paused at the door, turning back with a softer expression.
“take care guys and take it easy.”
jungkook understood the real meaning behind those words and he smiled gratefully, nodding at taehyung as he stepped inside the elevator, leaving you and jungkook alone. the moment the elevator doors sealed shut, he pulled you inside the office. his hold on you tightened as he gazed down at you and with a harsh exhale of your name, his mouth met yours but properly this time. his tongue slipping inside to hungrily explore your mouth, his free hand squeezing your hip pulling you flush against his body as you sighed into the kiss, your fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt.
“are you sure i didn’t disturb you?” you panted as he pulled away from the kiss. jungkook was already pulling you to the chair before you could finish your words, pulling you down onto his lap immediately, hands splaying across your back cupping the back of your head pressing your face gently into his chest.
“i couldn’t stop thinking about you even for a minute and you think showing up here is disturbing? it’s the best damn surprise ever.”
“really? i was a bit nervous at the front desk—” his hold tightens, a fraction of irritation crossing his face.
“yeah about that, i already handled that. she had no right to even question you. this whole building, this office, everything is yours as much as mine. next time anyone gives you trouble, you tell them exactly who you are,” he says with a glare on his face.
“i'll make sure they never forget it, wanted to fire her.”
“no no,” you gasp.
“it's okay koo really, i didn’t mind and she didn’t know me,” in order to distract him because you really feared that he might end up firing her, your lips met his once again. you sucked on his bottom lip making him growl into your mouth as you pulled back to place tiny kisses on his jawline. one of his hands slid down to grip your hair. he turned his head to meet your lips again. the kiss grew wetter and more urgent, little smacking sounds filling the office as you both breathed each other in. he helped you straddle him properly so you were seated sideways on his lap, your legs draped over his, all his focus on you as he buried his face into your neck.
“god you smell so good,” he whispered against your pulse point, nose brushing there.
“so fucking sweet, i hate being away from you even for a few hours,” you let out a breath, fingers playing with the collar of his shirt.
“i missed you too koo...”
“then don’t leave me again or at least come here more often.”
“did you enjoy being back at the library today? what did you do?” he listens with rapt concentration, a fond look on his face as you talk about how you spend your time at the library and how good you felt, his smile getting wider when you mention that you thought of him too. his hand slid down your thigh, rubbing the skin below your skirt. your bodies pressed close as your hands wrapped around his neck. you reached up and tucked the escaped strands of his hair behind his ear then smoothed them back.
“your hair is messy,” you whispered and he smiled against your mouth.
“fix it for me then wife,” you did carefully tucking the strands into his man bun while he watched you, placing a kiss on the inside of your wrist. once satisfied, you rested your head on his shoulder and he turned slightly to reach for his laptop, pulling it closer while keeping you securely on his lap. for a few minutes he tried to focus on work, typing one handed while his other arm stayed wrapped around you.
“just need to reply to this one email real quick.”
“stay right here, it feels good having you like this while i work.”
you hummed contentedly, happy to be in his presence as well but as the minutes passed, the closeness became too much and you grew squirmy, fidgeting on his lap. every subtle movement made you brush against the thick bulge in his pants and even though none of you commented on it, the sexual tension was palpable. your pussy throbbed emptily, remembering exactly how full and stretched he made you feel several nights ago when he took your virginity, it felt too long ago. your short skirt had ridden up dangerously high on your thighs from all the subtle movements, exposing more of your soft flesh. your ass cheek pressed so intimately against him. you could feel the heat radiating from his powerful body and the way he was hardening slowly even more making him nestle lewdly right against your panties between your pussy lips. you just couldn’t remain still, your hand gripping his shirt tightly. hoping he wouldn’t notice your desperation, you began rocking your hips slowly, grinding down ever so slowly against his hard length. the sudden friction makes you whine against his chest and you pray he doesn't hear you. your hips roll again, your pussy leaking on your panties from your arousal.
“mmh..” you shudder. jungkook's fingers paused mid type on the keyboard, exhaling hard on your ear, his hand tightening on your hip stilling you for a moment.
“baby…you're killing me,” he groaned, dark amusement on his face that made your stomach flutter. you knew he was completely aware of exactly what you were doing. he grabbed your waist and positioned you so you straddled one of his thick muscular things. the sudden pressure between your legs made you squeak but he shushed you, holding you momentarily in place.
“you miss it don’t you? my cock filling you up..”
“yes.” you breathed, your shyness fading in the haze of the moment.
“i miss that feeling so much. you were so big… i want you inside me again,” he groans at your words, his jaw clenching hard and how you don’t hesitate to ask what you want drives him mad every time as he kisses the top of your head.
“i want it too more than anything but i need you healed first. i was so worried about you after seeing you sore and bleeding. fuck, i don’t wanna rush and make you hurt again,” you let out a frustrated whine, your hips pressing down on his thigh. both of you breathe heavier now as his cock twitches on your thigh while he could no longer bring himself to focus on the screen.
“how does this feel?” he flexed his thigh muscles a bit and you moaned sharply at the new sensation, your head falling on his chest.
“too much pressure on you right now?” you shake your head frantically.
“it feels good…”
“yeah?” his teeth grit as your hips rolled once again, his thigh now perfectly pressed between your legs, his free hand trailing up your side to cup the full weight of one of your breasts through the fabric of your blouse, his thumb immediately finding and circling your nipple until it pebbled and had you writhing further in his lap.
“so needy already huh?” he growls. you bit down hard on your lower lip, your face turning red as embarrassment and excitement warred through you.
“i… i didn’t mean to koo, it's just… y-you're so hard under me,” your voice came out breathy and pleading without you being able to stop yourself. your movement caused your soaked panties to slide on his dress pants and he encouraged your movements by helping you hump him properly. while his other hand deftly unbuttoned the top few buttons of your blouse with ease as he pulled the fabric aside to expose your bra.
“goddammit,” he grumbles in approval. he doesn’t waste any time to tug the cups down, freeing your full perky breasts into his waiting palms and your bra underneath pushes them up perfectly, making them look even bigger. he envelops one entirely in his hand, kneading the flesh with just enough pressure for your back to arch into him while your thighs tremble from riding his thigh.
“look at you squirming on my thigh like you can't help it,” his thigh presses upward as he bounces you slightly on his lap, watching the way your boobs jiggle erotically. his words and actions have you growing heady, your lips parted with your pants.
“love these tits,” he growled as he pinched both nipples lightly between his fingers, tugging and rolling them until you let out a long moan.
“ahhh koo!” you yelp. he soothed the sensitive peaks immediately afterward by thumbing them gently, alternating between caresses and squeezes that made your pussy clench emptily, it felt like he was playing with your clit from how raw your nipples felt. your hips moving more openly now wantonly grinding against his thigh, bouncing on him and he watches with half lidded eyes, his lips curled up.
“that’s it.”
his hand slipped under the hem of your rumpled skirt, tracing the edge of your panties before pushing the soaked fabric aside to stroke your folds, two fingers parting your wet lips to glide through the copious essence.
“koo…koo,” you whimper now, rocking onto his working fingers as well as he circles your clit. it was building higher and higher until you felt like you might collapse right there on his lap. you needed him so much.
“are you still sore baby?” jungkook asked through the heavy lust in his voice, he was still concerned about you. his fingers continued their exploration, pausing right at your fluttering entrance without pushing inside, just rubbing the lips while his other hand kept lavishing attention on your exposed breasts.
“tell me the truth sweetheart. i need to know,” his mouth found the junction of your neck and shoulder, sucking at the skin before soothing it with his tongue.
“no... no i'm not. i promise i want you inside please.” you beg brokenly, hips chasing his fingers.
“even just a little p-please,” you stammer. he lets out an animal noise at your words, not being able to stop himself, all the hesitation gone from the way you beg for him so sweetly. he'd give you everything you wanted and more.
“okay baby okay.” he takes a deep breath.
“but only the tip yeah? don’t wanna push you,” he kissed the tip of your nose and you let out a small sob of relief, nodding against him and biting onto his shirt. he shifted you in his lap to free his cock from his slacks causing the length to spring out, slapping audibly against your inner thigh. you watched with hooded eyes, feeling your heart race at having his beastly rod close to your pussy after so long as he rubbed it slowly along your dripping slit, coating you with his precum as well. you were dripping so much that he believed that he didn’t even have to prep you with his fingers again, you were already incredibly stretched from taking him and also from the immense fingering. he teased your clit with the tip of his cock with deliberate nudges that had you whimpering as he slid up and down.
“are you ready for me sweet girl?” he puffs out hot breath on your ear making you shiver and cling to him harder. the position was new as well, the fact that you both were doing it in his office, half clothed made you more aroused than anything even though the door was locked.
“i wanna hear your voice y/n…” he orders when you just nod dumbly.
“y-yes please ahh—” your voice breaks on a sob as you felt his breath hitch too when he felt your slick heat envelop just the very tip of his cock and you were so wet that he slipped just a little bit inside like a magnet.
“fuck fuck,” he lets out a string of curses, eyes closing at the feeling of your tightness once again, he could never get used to this feeling. your pussy was fucking heaven. just the fat tip felt like he was stretching you impossibly, though it didn’t give you any burning sensation like it did when you lost your virginity. just pressure and the urge to take more. he kept his hips still refusing to buck up even an inch despite his cock pulsing with urgent need and the veins along it as he rubbed the leaking top right at your entrance.
“uh... uh… yes,” you hiccuped. wet sounds were all that could be heard along with both your breathy noises as he nudged forward another fraction of an inch, parting your lips with patience.
“so fucking wet for me already,” he husks out as he cups the back of your neck to keep your face close to his. you just took the tip but you were already clenching so tight, like you never wanted to let go but he could see you struggling.
“breathe for me yeah? i don’t wanna hurt you,” he palmed your ass to relax you. he inched forward slowly with a wet squelch making your thighs tremble uncontrollably against his lap as you felt every bit of his tip and probably the two more inches he allowed you to take without being fully inside. sweat was already beginning to bead along his forehead and chest as he kissed along your collarbone, sucking lightly on the skin before pulling back to watch your face intently and the way your head was thrown back.
“that's it… feel how wide you're opening for me? god such a good girl for me,” you clutched him harder when he gave a tiny thrust, not to put his entire cock inside but for a little friction. you were so damn tight around him he could barely think straight.
“tell me how it feels? use your words for me.”
“s-so good nghh gosh!” it felt so good but you felt so impatient and didn't like how the rest of you felt empty, you needed him all the way inside, the way he completes the emptiness inside you and the way he bulges your stomach. when it hurt so good but the sensation was otherworldly. your whimpers turn broken as you try to sink down further but jungkook's strong hands on your hips hold you firmly, keeping you impaled on just that thick head for what feels like torture. you wanted more, needed it and your entire body itself was craving it. the tip was not enough. more of your slick gushed out around him, dripping down his heavy balls, he groaned deeply and shifted his hips in the upward nudge that made the tip press insistently against you.
“nnn… please…”
“shit slow, baby slow,” he warned against your neck when he realized that you were squirming so much and he didn't want to mistakenly get inside you. he loved seeing you like this, shaking from just the head of his dick, dripping everywhere and making such a mess on him.
“my good girl… taking what i give you,” his fingers found your nipples again, rolling them between his thumbs as you nearly sobbed. finally the overwhelming hunger overtook you completely and with a drawn out cry, you bore down hard, your legs tightening around his waist as you sank lower and lower into his immense length not taking much effort from how much honey you were producing.
“ahh!” you cried. inch by inch he disappeared inside your core as your eyes watered and your mouth fell open in a silent scream. this new position made him reach even deeper inside you, like he was literally just inside your stomach. jungkook's head tipped back against the chair with a primal roar, shocked and pleased at how you'd abruptly just taken him inside. the noise from his mouth seemed to come from the depths of his soul, his fingers digging into your thighs as he fought every instinct to slam up into you.
“oh my fucking god baby!” he gasped. his mouth parting more as you squeezed him hard inside you, your tears spilling on his shirt.
“you little m-minx,” he stammers.
“i told you just the tip and here you are swallowing every fucking inch like you can't live without it huh?” he growls. he was pressing right against your cervix and you were fully mindless, like he was rearranging your insides with his sheer size. your ass finally met his thighs completely, your bodies flush and locked together as your legs wrapped tighter around him. you were only capable of mumbling nonsense, your head thrashing side to side, your pussy clenching rhythmically around him, milking him drawing out shaky moans from his throat too.
“jungkook!” you sobbed when he pulled you closer, making him sink even deeper as his heart hammered against your breasts.
“ohh koo, you're so big… i can't, i can't.. it's too much,” your body movements and your words said otherwise as you fisted his hair, both of you throbbing connected together. he pressed a kiss against your ear, panting against it as he held you there without thrusting yet, just savoring the way your bodies were completely joined. you watched with teary eyes as his free hand reached blindly for the laptop.
“you feel so fucking good wrapped around me baby. missed you so damn much,” his other hand reached down, collecting your slick from where you both were connected and you leaked out, using it over your clit and rubbing, it had you gasping and grinding down harder against him. the pleasure pain filled you all over as your toes curled, your hands fisting from the overload of everything as he held you affectionately even though his body screamed at him to take you hard, to press you against his desk, and to pound your pussy stupid until you forget your own name. but he won't. never. not while you're still getting used to him.
“are you okay baby?” he kissed against your lips and you nodded shakily, his hand coming up to wipe some of your tears away.
“now be a good girl and warm my cock while i finish these reports yeah?” he pressed another kiss on your shoulder, resting his forehead there.
“don't move too much or i'll have to punish you later,” his degrading words mixed with care sent a thrill through you. you loved how caring and filthy he could be. the thought of him punishing you made you more frightened, heart racing with the possibilities. it was torment for both of you, him inside you twitching, the constant pressure without moving. you tried to obey him, settling fully onto his lap with your legs around him as you rested your cheek against his chest, listening to the click clack of his keyboard as he typed one handed even though his entire body was filled with tension and you wondered how he managed to work like that while he was releasing precum cum inside you and his cock thrashing. the fullness was maddening as every second passed as you throbbed around him and clenched more of your essence, leaking all around him and soaking his big balls. you couldn't remain still, your hips began to betray you, subtly feeling him shift and drag inside your pussy.
“haah… haah,” you bite your lower lip but couldn't stifle the noises. you could feel him nudging your g-spot and you felt closer to the release without him thrusting even once. your breathing grew ragged against the side of his neck, your whimpers escaping as you pulled hard on his shirt, one button threatening to break.
“koo… i can't… it feels so good.”
“uhnn...” you whined.
jungkook chuckles darkly against you, the vibration traveling straight down to where you were impaled on him making you spasm harder around his cock. he didn't stop typing but one hand slipped down once again, finding your clit perfectly. the pad of his thumb began to rub lazily right on the tip of your clit that had retreated from the hood from how horny you were. short little “ah ahs” leave you as he keeps you balanced right on the edge of the orgasm, never granting you the release you crave as your thighs quiver with every slow swirl of his thumb making you gush on his lap, some even driving down on the chair beneath. your hips grind harder, wanting more friction, more depth, more of everything. you wanted to cry out loud, your butt quivering too while he calmly worked.
“having a hard time baby?” he occasionally flexes his cock just to hear you gasp and you couldn't even speak. a sudden knock on the office door shattered the silence, making you jolt violently in his lap as fear went through you.
“oh god...” you panted. your heart raced in your chest as your cheeks flushed even redder, you desperately clung to jungkook's muscular chest burying your face into the safety of his chest. his heart thrummed where your lips were pressed showing that he was just as excited from the thrill.
“someone's here, t-they'll see us like this, they’ll know!” you whisper frantically. even though your pussy nervously clenched around his still buried cock in a few tight spasms that make him throb inside you as he groans. the added stimulation forces another spurt of his precum to leak against your walls, embarrassing wetness leak around where you both were connected. the scent of sex seemed impossibly strong in the room. you felt exposed yet impossibly full of him as your body kept on betraying you by squeezing him even harder, making it hard for him to remain still and not thrust into you.
“shh it's okay, baby… i've got you,” jungkook rumbles reassuringly into your hair, his arms wrapped around your waist, securely holding you against his chest. his other hand remained casually on the desk as if nothing were amiss.
“no one will know that you're impaled all the way on my cock like a good little wife… warming me so perfectly.”
“you trust me right?” he insists. he cupped the side of your face, looking into your glistening eyes as you swallowed and nodded shakily. with quick fingers he adjusted your skirt, spreading the fabric so it draped modestly over your joined bodies completely hiding the obscene sight of his big cock inside your pussy, also pushing your bra up to cover your breasts and buttoning up your blouse. from any outside perspective, it would simply look like you were perched innocently on your husband's lap for a cuddle during his long workday. your face hidden against his chest. your head spun with the humiliated arousal and the fear of getting caught as another trickle of your juices escaped, your lower body squirming, not being able to sit still.
“come in,” jungkook called out. his voice was completely normal as if he wasn't balls deep inside your cunt at the very moment. the door opened, and an employee stepped inside holding a stack of files, his eyes widening slightly at the sight of you sitting so intimately on the ceo's lap. though he quickly turned his expression to one of polite as always, he was intimidated by jungkook.
“mr. jeon i have the reports you asked for—oh i didn’t realize you had company. should i come back later?” he asked hesitantly. his gaze flicking once more toward your form before dropping respectfully to the floor. you kept your face completely buried against jungkook's chest, a gasp leaving you as you were completely hyperaware of the employee's presence and every inch of his cock as your pussy flutters even more. shameful excitement warred within you. jungkook didn’t miss a single beat, one hand continued gently stroking up and down your back, his fingers occasionally dipping lower to trace the curve of your ass through the skirt.
“leave them here on the desk and make sure we’re not disturbed for the next hour, also cancel all the meetings for the day and lock the door on your way out.”
the employee nodded quickly, murmuring apologies and casting one last glance at your position before retreating hastily. the door clicked shut behind him, the lock clicking into place with a click. jungkook lets out a low, wicked laugh, tilting your chin up with two fingers for a rough kiss. his hips gave one teasing thrust that made you moan.
“see? all safe baby, no one knows how full you are.”
“now… where were we?” your flushed face remained buried on his chest panting, your skirt arranged over where you both were joined. a whimper escaped you as his cock dragged against that spongy spot inside, sending sparks of pleasure through you, making your nipples tighten inside your blouse. it felt painful to have them constricted suddenly when they were out freely.
“jungkook...” you whisper shakily.
“no one's coming in for the rest of the afternoon. it's just you and me now. you like that hm?” he laps against your pulse on your throat and you nod, bottom lip quivering. you started rocking more profoundly while milking his length from how much essence you released and jungkook groaned, gripping your hips while his own hips thrust up to your downward motions.
“that's it.” he murmured against your ear nipping it, knowing how it's so sensitive and makes you moan every time.
“rock on my cock just like that. let me feel how much this greedy little pussy missed being stuffed full of me,” his fingers pressed even more firmly against your swollen clit now, rubbing side to side so hard your thighs shake and your back arches instinctively against his chest while he swells further inside you if that was even possible, both of your heartbeats pounding so hard.
“this pussy was made for me right?” he bites out with clenched teeth.
“yes ahh fuck yes, it was made for you, only you,” he growls at the way you curse so sweetly while you rocked faster against him, unable to resist the friction. it was not enough, it was slow, not one of euphoria when he fucked you so good. your clit ground against his pubic bone with every roll of your hips.
“shitt princes...” his hips bucked up sharply and hard and it punched the air from your lungs. a glare on his face, he looked so angry from holding himself back, his expression made you tremble.
“fuck i can't hold back anymore… i need to move.” he admitted hoarsely.
“yes—yes—” you babbled. his hand gripped your ass hard enough to leave marks and to hold you steady as he began to thrust up into you properly this time, dragging his cock almost fully out, leaving you empty before sinking back in to the hilt in one smooth motion hitting your g-spot so fucking well.
“jungkook, jungkook!” you murmur his name repeatedly, his brows furrowing in concentration. he dragged his cock inside you, each glide getting wetter filthier and more addictive. it made squelching noises with every unhurried thrust of his as you made a mess on his lap, some spurting and dripping down his chair. his heavy balls slapped against your wet folds, making pat pat pat noises, the pornographic noises and both of your moans turned him even animalistic, his movements causing the chair beneath you both to creak as well.
“oh my god koo..” you squealed out with a whine as your teeth sunk into the skin of his neck, tasting him while the sensual rhythm had your entire body bouncing on him, your nails digging into his shoulders through the shirt. he circled your clit faster now, pressing and rubbing while rolling his hips as you saw stars behind your eyelids.
“ahnn… mm… ngh…” that's all you were capable of letting out despite your best efforts to stay quiet and you didn't know if people outside the office could hear.
“people might hear, ohh koo please,” you managed to sob between his thrusts which ended in another moan as he did this grinding motion after pressing perfectly against your cervix and you clenched tight on him.
“ugh damn it,” jungkook snarled, his hips never faltering.
“let me hear how well i fuck my wife,” he pulled you down on his cock.
“i want every single person in this building to know this perfect little pussy belongs to their boss,” he pinched your swollen clit between his fingers making your body jerk as you scream out squeezing and rippling more slick arousal. it happened so suddenly that your mind couldn't catch up to it, your entire lower body reacted as you sobbed loudly.
“jungkook! i'm cumming oh fuck, i can't—”
your orgasm crashed over you powerfully, like you had fallen from a height and your vision blurred, your entire body shook as pleasure took over every inch of you. his cock continues thrusting as you came hard while you keened trying to hold back your screams.
“ahh!” your juices gushed out around his shaft, soaking him completely and jungkook breathes hard at the sensation.
“such a good fucking wife creaming all over me so prettily mm yeah… shit.”
you spurted more hearing his words as he mumbles praises against your hair, feeling you around him. he slowed his thrusts more and deeply through your climax, drawing it out while his fingers never stopped flicking your clit, smearing your cum everywhere painting you with it. even as the aftershocks continued, your muscles twitching and everything felt overly sensitive.
“you can do one more for me baby,” he placed a kiss against your cheek.
“i can't i can't.” you chanted with a sob.
“shh you can… just focus on what you're feeling… doing so good for me,” his hips rolled in and out of your creamy heat with long strokes that kept you riding the high without ever letting you fully come down. each drag and push kept building the edge again, the noises grew more wet as he sloppily fucked you. your cum coated his entire dick and his balls while his fingers continued to play with your folds and clit, teasing you as well while chasing his release. time seemed to lose all its meaning, it felt endless from how he kept on going, his mouth meeting yours hotly, full of shared breaths and tangling of tongues as he breathes harshly after pulling back.
“you're so tight baby...” he hisses brokenly like you're trying to cut off his blood flow.
“this pussy was made to take my cock all day long wasn't it? made just for me to fill and love like this,” your second orgasm approached quickly enough even more intensely than the last, coaxed by him while he made sure not to hurt you or overstimulate you with careful rubs on your clit while he constantly praised you.
“just let go whenever you want baby,” he coos. your body shook as it finally washed over you again, your pussy spasming wildly around his thickness.
“koo!” you cried out his name again and again, not caring that people could possibly hear you outside, feeling like no logical or rational thought mattered. jungkook groaned as your orgasm seemed to trigger his as well as he pumped you a few more times before he buried himself to the hilt with a roaring noise and released spurts and spurts of cum inside you, filling you to the brim. both of you shook together while he held you close making sure that your pussy took every bit of his white mess, still slightly fucking you lazily and thoroughly. not pulling out just yet and enjoying the feeling of buried so deeply inside you. his cock is warm and happy in this little cunt where he belongs… right here with you, his everything. his cock pulsed inside you, cum beginning to leak out as your pussy fluffed exhaustingly. jungkook's arms wrapped around your waist as he stroked up and down your back soothingly.
“i've got you...” he murmurs huskily, his man bun was slightly disheveled from exertion.
“you did so fucking good for me… took every inch. how does that pretty pussy feel now hm?” you whimpered burying your face into his neck, taking in the scent of the remnants of your shared pleasure.
“i can feel you leaking out of me…” you whispered bashfully as another small trickle of his cum slid down your inner thigh. he lets out a soft chuckle, one hand sliding down to cup your ass cheek.
“yeah? gonna keep it there a little longer while i hold you,” he didn't pull out right away, instead he rocked the chair back and forth in a rhythm while cradling you and you felt sleepy almost and so loved in a haze of afterglow. he kissed wherever he found your skin exposed, his own breathing becoming regular. his cock has long softened inside you but your occasional twitches made him clench his jaw, his cock hardening a little more once again.
“was it too much?” he asked, pulling back just enough to search your eyes, his hand moving to your front palm resting over your lower belly where you could still feel the bulge of him inside.
“i need to know.” he rasps.
“i'm good… just shaky. you always make me feel so much,” you admitted, a smile on your lips despite the exhaustion and he hummed in approval. he simply held you like that for a while instead of focusing on how his cock was hardening again, caressing your thighs where his handprints were. he kissed the hickies on your collarbone that never seemed to fade because he was always making new ones every day. eventually he couldn't take it any longer and not wanting to overstimulate you, his cock was fully hard once again. he hated being separated from you but he'd probably end up fucking you a few more times if he stayed inside which he understood would be too much for you. he carefully eased you out and both of you groaned as his cock slipped out of your dripping pussy with a wet obscene sound that made you blush hard. a tiny gush of his cum followed, coating your thighs and jungkook groaned at the sight, using his fingers to gently push some of it back inside you.
“stay just like this for me tonight yeah? want you thinking of me,” your eyes lowered shyly as he reached for the pack of wet wipes in his desk drawer cleaning you both gently, wiping your core with soft dabs that made you hiss at the sensitivity then his own cock that you looked at with wide eyes because he was hard again as he put his pants back on, taking a few breaths, willing for him to calm down though he doubted it would. he held you still, understanding that your legs were wobbling as he fixed your skirt back down and your blouse.
“there we go...”
he can't have his girl walking out looking too fucked out even though you look sexy as hell right now but it was only for him to see. his employees knew better than to stare at you before he fired all of them on the spot and either way he was planning to take you out himself.
“listen baby, i want you to be ready for tonight. i'm taking you out on a proper date,” he muses. you stared at him as he fixed your hair.
“a-a date?” he chuckled and nodded as his hands skimmed your waist.
“be waiting for me when i get home. i'll pick you up after i wrap up these last things from here,” he wanted to leave with you but he couldn't ignore the incoming works and he wanted to finish everything so he was yours for the rest of the night and probably even the day after. you nodded with a racing heart, you couldn't believe he was asking for a date so innocently after pumping you full of his cum.
“okay... but my legs are so shaky right now. how am i supposed to walk out of here?” a laugh escaped you as you clung to his shirt, feeling giddy and he grinned, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.
“that's my fault huh? come on baby, i'll carry you,” you yelped as he stood picking you up like you weighed nothing. you didn't think that he'd take your words too seriously. he took the private elevator directly to the garage so you wouldn't fall under the eyes of any workers, he didn't wanna overwhelm you and mainly because he was a selfish man not wanting anyone to put eyes on his wife. he walked to his car and settled you inside, signaling at the driver, who straightens up immediately.
“take a warm bath, pamper yourself and i'll handle everything else yeah?” his thumb brushed over your bottom lip and you looked at him with dazed eyes as he leaned in stealing another kiss from you, having no urge to leave you even for a few hours when you're so full of him and his cock was so warm inside you. it's scary how much he needs you.
“you make me so fucking happy you know that?” you melted a little more, pressing one last kiss against his jaw.
“i feel the same koo...” jungkook's eyes softened and he pulled you against his chest one last time, chin resting on your head.
“text me when you're home safe,” he gave your ass a gentle pat, making you giggle shyly as he helped you gather yourself, your pussy still throbbing under your panties as the excitement for the date buzzed through you mixing with his touches. you couldn’t for tonight.
you stood in front of the full length mirror in the bedroom, the dress jungkook had sent over earlier that evening hugged every bit of your curve like his hands would. it was a satin babydoll style short dress in a light pastel color, it showed off your breasts perfectly, giving a generous view of your cleavage and ended just below your ass. it was pretty yet sexy at the same time and you couldn’t stop blushing in front of the mirror since you wore it. the brand of the dress had your eyes widening too and the price tag. you shifted your weight, doing minimal makeup and you got ready earlier than you're supposed to because you’ve been feeling restless and full of anticipation and also put on matching heels with the dress. you showered after coming home, trying to hold yourself back from touching yourself to the memories of how he'd taken you in his office. you sat on the edge of the bed, heart racing, legs bouncing, before you decided to grab your phone. biting your lip with a smile, you decided to take a picture for him. you snapped a photo, arching your back slightly to capture the curve of your ass and angling your body in a way so your breasts are visible too. you looked glowing, well fucked and ready for him.
jungkook stepped inside the house, his suit jacket already slung over one shoulder, tie loosened and the first few buttons undone. the moment his eyes landed on you, waiting in the living room dressed in what he'd sent, a possessive rush came in him. he loved having you wearing his money, your skin still carrying that post intimacy glow from earlier in the day.
“baby,” he breathes out, dropping his jacket on the bed before closing the distance.
“you look fucking breathtaking. missed you like hell today,” he pulled you into his arms immediately, one hand splaying across your lower back, his lips finding yours, tongue teasing the seam of your mouth until you parted for him and you whimpered happily in his mouth as he kissed you senseless like he hadn't seen you in weeks instead of hours.
“it's only been a few hours,” you grin.
“felt like years,” he groans, nuzzling your cheek before pulling back just enough to look at you.
“ready for our date?” you nodded bashfully and he kissed the back of your hand and freshened himself up before guiding you to the car, his eyes raking over your back appreciatively and you swayed your hips intentionally just because you knew he was watching. he drove to a private rooftop garden terrace that he'd rented entirely for the night, fairy lights draped overhead and flowers everywhere with a single set table overlooking the city and soft music played in the background. no staff lingered, everything was prearranged for complete privacy and he'd spent a fortune to ensure it.
“wow jungkook... this is incredible,” you take in the sight.
“you really did all this for us?” jungkook turned to you with a smile, pulling you into his arms.
“of course i did baby. i wanted it to be just you and me, no interruptions at all,” you both sat at the table, talking while you enjoyed the food. both of you sharing about your days as he listened to whatever you said with rapt attention, his eyes never leaving your face, reaching across to intertwine your fingers.
“i love seeing you happy like this,” you squeezed his hand.
“it's because of you…” you croaked. after the meal he led you to a coach lounge area and pulled you in his arms. both of you enjoyed the silence in each other's presence as apocalypse by cigarettes after sex played. it felt like it was just the two of you and this romantic intimacy. your eyes fall on a bottle of wine that was inside an ice bucket on the table that jungkook didn't even touch. you noticed it immediately, the bottle. your gaze lingered on the unopened wine a bit, distracted as he placed a kiss on your shoulder. memories of your father flashed briefly and the way he used to be in his worst state when he was drunk and would break things, used to beat your mother badly, the first ever time when he raised his hand at you when you were five was also when he was drunk. that's why you'd avoided alcohol yourself even when you reached the appropriate age and also didn't feel comfortable being around people drinking altogether. jungkook knew that by heart and never drank with you by his side, he doesn't even remember drinking just proper wine after marriage. once upon a time the trauma was deep seated in you always but it didn't grip you like before now after you'd started healing with jungkook. you turned to him, hands fidgeting.
“jungkook… i wanna try some, a little i guess, with you,” he paused, searching your eyes carefully.
“you wanna try wine with me?” you swallowed and nodded and he didn't say anything for a few seconds.
“baby are you sure? you don't have to, i never drink around you because i know how it makes you feel. why are you suddenly saying this?” he asked concernedly. you look down at your fingers
“because.. i want to... i wanna let go of my past and experience new things a-and i trust you,” you looked at him with glistening eyes and he cupped your cheek, softness on his face after hearing your words and how safe you felt in his presence to be wanting to try this.
“yeah? alright baby, only because you wanna try but we'll go with one small glass.”
“we stop the second you feel off okay?” he mentions it again to make sure.
“i trust you,” you say again, leaning into him.
“i know you won't hurt me, you're nothing like him, i... i wanna see what its like,” he kissed your forehead and nodded.
“alright love, small sips,” he poured you a modest glass of the rich red wine then a bit for himself when you insisted.
“only because you want me to share this with you,” he was more than happy with you wanting to try it and he didn't wanna trigger your past by doing it himself but the way you looked at him made it hard for him to deny you. the first sip made you hum at the taste despite the bitterness as you took another almost immediately, feeling a looseness spread through your limbs as you nestled deeper into his arms while jungkook monitored your every expression protectively. jungkook was used to handling more strong alcohols and this was nothing compared to them, but as you finish half the glass he could feel the changes in you
“you're already getting tipsy huh?” he took the glass from your hand and set it aside.
“that's enough for you tonight baby, i don't want you feeling sick,” you giggled, actually giggled, feeling lighter than usual like all your stress has been washed away as you turned in his lap, straddling him and rested your head on his chest, your arms around his neck.
“mmm you're so warm and big… my pretty husband,” you let out in a rush of breath. jungkook froze before letting out a delighted laugh as he held you close.
“pretty? that's a new one,” he stroked your sides, you were so damn adorable to him, it made him want to kiss you silly as you turned your head, kissing the mole under his lips sloppily before capturing his mouth in a messy kiss.
“this mole is especially pretty,” you slur feeling more bold as the alcohol loosened your tongue.
“mhmm?” he sighed as your hands roamed on his chest.
“dance with me?” he chuckled and nodded, guiding you in the middle. this reminded him of the early days of your marriage when you'd joined him at the party and you'd let him touch you for the first time. he relished in those memories. you both danced under the stars, your body pressed flush against him, hips swaying lazily as the music changed to a much more sensual one. he held you, one hand on your lower back, the other cradling your hand, he spun you suddenly making you giggle. your lips brushed on his as you breathed the same air, a whimper leaving you as you felt his hardness growing against your belly but he never pushed, simply swaying with you but your drunk state took all the hesitation away from you.. not a single bit of shyness left.
“you're so good to me,” you mumbled against his skin, playing with the hair. your deepest fantasy coming out that you've never said aloud but feeling the urge to confess so much, that your sober state wouldn't even dare to.
“i love when you eat my pussy you know? your tongue is my favorite, so warm and wet licking me so slowly and ah—” your voice breaks off on a moan when you trip on your feet.
“careful,” he grips your arms and guides you to sit back down as he realizes that you're increasingly losing control. he groaned at your words, his own breathing grew heavier but his touches remained tender. you kept going, your hand gripping his shoulders as you looked at him with a giddy smile.
“i haven't forgotten... you know? you wanted to take my ass, you promised,” you pouted.
“why don't you talk about it anymore huh?” you gripped the collar of his shirt. you had so many dirty thoughts and the alcohol running through your veins made you feel horny too, thinking of how you wanted to use his mouth to your will, ride his face and make a mess and wanted his cock between your breasts once again, you wanted everything and more. you wanted him to do you, the thought of drunk sex sent fire through you. you could see that his eyes were getting darker with desire, pupils blown as he reduced your kiss to a few seconds instead, his own head growing dizzy at the taste of you and wine mixed together. he didn't add more to your words even though his whole body was reacting, his cock hardening to a rock.
“easy. you're drunk now princess. i want you to drink some water okay?” he grabbed the jug to pour you some water and you shook your head clumsily.
“n-no, i'm not drunk,” you protested. your arms wrapped around him once again.
“you're mine,” you kissed his cheek wetly, giggling as his heart swelled, half lidded eyes full of adoration falling in yours.
“i'm yours always angel,” he pecked your forehead before helping you sit upright.
“here, drink some water,” he made you sip some water before you settled back into his body as he held you. he felt loose and relaxed too, not even tipsy but with you here and having a drink after a while made him feel good. he couldn't help himself and pulled out a single cigarette. he didn't really smoke a lot around you and he'd reduced it a lot that he rarely smoked now since you came into his life because he faced less stress but the looseness urged him to have one. he lights it and takes a slow drag, his shoulder drops further as he glances back at you with that devastatingly handsome smile. even in your fuzzy head, he looked so good as you watched the way his lips wrapped around the cigarette, heat bloomed in your belly and you bit your bottom lip.
“kook...” you slurred a little as you sat up.
“that looks… nice. can i try? just once?” you sounded awfully demanding and adventurous tonight to try a bunch of new things, though this time he didn't take it lightly. he turned, brows furrowing as the cigarette hovered away from his mouth.
“no baby, absolutely not,” he shakes his head as he takes another drag and blows the smoke away from you.
“you're already drunk, this shits harsh not happening,” you crawled to the edge of the couch and reached out for his hand
“please? you've had wine with me. i just wanna see what it feels like. i'm safe with you remember?” you gave him those doe eyes that he could never resist. he signed, running a hand through his hair but keeping the cigarette high and out of reach.
“baby no, you aren't used to it, this isn't for you.”
“but i feel so good right now,” you whimpered, wrapping your legs around his waist.
“just once, pretty please?” he groaned, clearly torn as his free hand rubbed up and down your back while he stared down at your pleading eyes.
“fuck… you're too cute when you're like this, it's not fair,” he hesitated for a bit, brows furrowing.
“one single puff that's it. you get me?” his commanding tone makes your legs squeeze together but you nodded eagerly.
“deal.”
jungkook muttered something under his breath, he didn't mind spoiling you but when it's harmful for you, that's where he draws the line. he brought the cigarette carefully to your lips, there was something so erotic about sharing a cigarette together.
“suck just a little,” your eyes locked on his as you took a tentative pull but the smoke hit your throat sharp enough for you to catch up and you immediately pulled back, bursting into a fit of coughs as your eyes water.
“shit i told you,” jungkook quickly flicked the cigarette away into the ashtray and pulled you into his arms.
“breathe baby,” his jaw clenched as you kept coughing lightly against his shirt.
“you never listen to me,” there was no anger in his voice, just concern.
“are you okay?” his fingers stroked through your hair. you nodded but had a grin because everything felt so funny, even the way he looked so concerned.
“ugh it tastes bad. how do you do that?” jungkook chuckled, holding you tighter.
“i don't need it anymore when i have you,” he tilted your face up, kissing you.
“now be good and let me take care of my drunk little wife,” he knew one thing for sure, he was wrapped around your little finger.
he texted the driver with the other hand, knowing you had to go home and relax and you were too far gone to spend time here any longer. throughout the ride home he held you close in the backseat with your head rested against his shoulder and you kept pressing kisses on his neck the entire way, giggling every time the car turned a corner and you slid a little in his lap, your body felt hotter by the second feeling his bulge that he tried to keep away from you but couldn't from the way you were straddling him. he carried you back inside the house, taking off your heels himself one handed while the other held you cradled like the strong man he was and you were swooning at it. he'd already dimmed the lights in the room, he kicked the bedroom shut behind him and set you down gently on the bed but you immediately reached for him by his shirt tugging him closer.
“koo… come here,” you whined. you felt so floaty and got so turned on as you looked up at him with adoring eyes as he stood before you, his bulge at your eye level.
“you're so fucking hot like... stupid hot. i think about your cock all the time,” he lets out a surprised laugh, his own cheeks tinting slightly.
“you're really feeling it tonight hmm?” he crouched in front of you, hands resting on your bare thighs.
“how are you feeling? nauseous? should i bring more water?” you shook your head immediately as you gripped him hard.
“no don't go. i feel so warm… i want you,” your hands slid up his chest, fingers fumbling a little with the buttons.
“let me suck your cock koo please? i want it in my mouth... i wanna taste you,” jungkook's breath hitched as his eyes squeezed shut, breathing a few times to regulate himself as his cock twitched in approval of your words. the last time he'd had you this bold was when you gave him your virginity and here you were doing it again. he caught your wandering hands gently before your hand could reach his hardness. you were driving him absolutely insane.
“you're drunk, we're not doing that tonight honey...”
he stood up about to walk away to grab a bottle of water but you held onto him, crawling forward and nuzzling your face against his crotch, rubbing against the hard length of him, coos leaving you repeatedly and he growled.
“but i want to... you like it when i give you head don't you? when i'm sloppy and wet,” your voice grows needy and high.
“i wanna choke on it. i want to look up at you while you fuck my throat... mm y-yes... please i'll be so good,” you slurred out longingly. he groaned loudly, one hand coming up to cup the back of your head, not pushing you closer but not pulling you away yet either. his resolve was weakening but he would never do anything while you're drunk, no matter how much you ask for it. his jaw was tight, breathing hard as he kept his bulge away from you.
“goddamn it, you're gonna kill me. listen to me love.”
he tilted your chin so you had to meet his eyes.
“you're tipsy right now and i'm not letting you suck me off when you're not fully sober. you might regret it tomorrow.”
“absolutely not happening,” you made a frustrated little sound still trying to reach for his belt.
“i won't regret it. i want your cum on my tongue… y-you always taste so good koo... mm a little salty.”
your pussy clenched as you let out a wanton moan, your legs squeezing together.
“and when you tell me i'm your good girl while i'm sucking… it makes me so wet,” jungkook exhaled shakily, gently guiding you back into the bed so you were lying down and he climbed over you, helping you settle.
“no matter what you say, my cock stays in my pants tonight,” you let out such a sad whine that it made his chest hurt as you wrapped your legs around his waist, grinding up against him clumsily.
“h-hahh koo... mmph.”
you kept on babbling, not in your right mind.
“i want it. i want you to use my mouth. like a toy—” your voice breaks as you hiccup.
“i want you to cum all over my tits and then rub it or… or f-fuck oh, bend me over and spank me for being bad won't you?” his hips pressed down instinctively once letting you feel how hard he actually was before he pinned your hips still with one hand, not letting you hump him anymore. you were really being like a bunny in heat and if you weren't drunk, he'd most definitely fuck you senseless and do everything to you that he'd promised in the texts after the date. you were so honest while you were drunk.
“we're going to go over every single thing you said when you're sober but right now you're going to drink water and get sleep.”
“nooo,” you fussed childishly trying to tug his shirt up that was out of his pants already.
“can't i just lick your cock a little, just the tip? please please,” he chuckled, shaking his head as he rolled you both as you were lying on top of him instead.
“no sweetheart, not even the tip.”
you were slurring your words and your hands were shaking a little. he sees you and notices the littlest thing, no matter how frustrated he was, he wouldn't give you what he wanted. he was a man and a man knew how to control his desires and respect a woman be it his partner or someone else, nothing should be done non consensually when the other isn't in their right state of mind. his job was to take care of you and not take advantage. you buried your face in his neck, kissing and suckling.
“you're so mean…” you pouted hard and his thumb brushed on your bottom lip, your lipstick was a bit smudged too. he couldn't help but lean down for a peck making you laugh.
“i'm gonna dream about your cock now then, since you won't give it to me,” jungkook nodded.
“tomorrow when you're clear headed and asking, i'll let you do whatever you want to me, for now...” he reached over to grab the water bottle, helping you drink more.
“good girl.”
you drank obediently some water, dribbling down your chin that he wiped away with his thumb while you kept talking sleepily as he helped you out of the dress and grabbed a comfortable nightie of yours from the drawer, he unclasped your bra and took off your panties, never lingering his eyes on them, keeping his eyes fixed on your face instead as he finished putting the fabric on you.
“you promise you will fuck my ass one day?” you asked with a yawn, already growing sleepy as you lay under the covers he's draped over your body and he lets out a low gruff noise at how you're persistent about it and he kisses your forehead and nods.
“i promise,” you smiled happily, so unaware of the way he was getting blue balls, he definitely needed a cold shower after you slept. you drifted off with a few more mumbles curling against his chest.
“i… i think i love—” your words slurred off as sleep claimed you mid sentence as you drifted on his chest. jungkook froze, his heart squeezing painfully in his chest as he looked down at your peaceful face. his shaky fingers tuck a strand of hair behind your ear as he leans his forehead close to yours, knowing in his heart what you were about to say, tears brimming in his eyes. his entire being was filled with so much overflowing love for you he felt overwhelmed with it that you didn’t even finish saying it yet it affected him hard. he starved to hear those three words from your mouth… yet he wondered if he actually deserved it. he feared something might take you away from him once again, good things don’t last too long in his life. he grabbed your makeup remover from where you keep your makeup items and started removing your makeup gently.
“koo…”
you mumble his name in your sleep, hand not letting go of his shirt and he knows he'll love you till his last breath. even then his soul would search and yearn for you in every afterlife and in every universe.
you stirred the next morning with a groan, your body feeling that heaviness, a hammering headache that made your head bury in the pillow. jungkook's arm was draped over your waist, his breath falling on your neck, his legs tangled with yours under the covers. you blinked awake little fragments of the previous night flicking through your mind, both of you dancing together, your body pressed against his, the date… you insisted on drinking a little and got drunk. you didn’t remember exactly what happened after getting fully drunk but you knew you said embarrassing stuff. bits and pieces you remembered about wanting to smoke his cigarette, wanting to suck his cock and how you'd been all over the place giggling and being silly. you also specifically remembered how you'd voiced your desire for him to take your ass. your cheeks reddened as you felt jungkook shift behind you, his arm tightening as he woke.
“morning baby, how's your head?”
you turned, not being able to face him as you hid your burning face against his chest.
“it's... okay, not too bad.”
“jungkook… did i… say a lot of stuff last night?” he chuckled, his hand pressing against your waist as you still didn’t face him.
“yeah you did. you were really cute though,” he pressed a kiss on top of your head and tilted your chin up so you would look at him. his eyes sparked with amusement, though his lips were curved in a fond smile as he had the urge to tease you.
“you told me how much you love it when i eat your pussy… how much my tongue feels better than anything, that you get wet just from thinking about it and you kept kissing the mole right here—” he tapped the spot under his lips.
“i didn’t know you loved it so much huh?”
“oh my gosh.” you gasped, covering your face with both hands as you felt embarrassment wash over you. your cheeks felt like they were on fire.
“i can't believe i said that. i was drunk… i didn’t mean to just blurt everything out like that,” you were absolutely mortified but there was a tiny shameful part of you underneath who had the relief of having let those hidden desires surface. you probably wouldn’t ever dare to say that if you were sober. jungkook pried your hands away and leaned in to peck your nose, then your lips softly.
“hey don't hide from me… i loved hearing everything.”
“you made me so fucking hard baby but i didn’t let you drink more, brought you back home, changed your clothes and held you until you fell asleep,” your heart raced but from how he was so caring even at such times and never took advantage, like men like your father would or what you’ve assumed every other man to do as well. not everyone was abusive while drunk, jungkook proved you wrong every single day.
“i was such a mess though,” you peeked up at him through your lashes.
“i'm sorry if i embarrassed you or said too much.”
“never.”
he shook his head, pulling you closer as he held you close to him.
“you didn't embarrass me at all, you were honest, that's all i want from you,” he kissed you deeper this time, tongue brushing yours and when he pulled back, his forehead rested against yours.
“i'm glad you feel safe enough to say those things to me.”
you let out a shaky breath, the awkwardness fading under his gaze and his touches as your fingers traced the lines of his abs absentmindedly. you felt yourself open up more to him.
“i do trust you more than i ever did… last night it felt good to let go even if i don’t remember every second.”
“i was all over you i guess,” you flush. jungkook grinned.
“you definitely were, kept telling me how hot i am when i moan and to spank you…”
he placed kisses against your collarbone, your eyes widening at his words.
“i had to keep reminding you that you were tipsy and we'd wait till you were sober.”
you laughed and hid your face in the crook of his neck again.
“stop reminding me i sound like a horny teenager.”
“you sound like my wife.” he corrected warmly as his fingers played with your hair, massaging your scalp and making you hum.
“my beautiful sexy as hell wife and i wouldn’t change a second of it.”
he paused, he first thought he wasn’t going to mention it but he ended up doing it reluctantly.
“you almost told me you l-loved me before you fell asleep or at least... it sounded like that before you drifted off,” your breath caught, lips parting but he placed a finger on your lips, cutting off your words as your glistening eyes meet his emotion filled ones.
“jungkook…”
“you don’t have to say anything now.” he murmurs.
“we've got time all the time in the world,” you gulp at his words as he pulls you closer, looking down at you softly.
“we do right…? we got lots of time?” there was something in your voice, something that scared the both of you but he nodded, kissing the inside of your palm.
“we do,” and you believed so, he wasn’t going anywhere, neither were you.
“how about we start the day slow? i'll make breakfast then we can just… watch something or just be on the couch, whatever you want.”
you nodded with a smile.
“that sounds perfect,” the weight of your earlier words was still there and he felt it.
“thank you for taking care of me last night, for always taking care of me.”
“always,” he promised sincerely as his hand caressed your side, both your noses nuzzling together, he smirked wanting to ease things.
“we'll talk more about those drunk confessions later, i've got plans for all of them.”
you swatted his chest playfully, laughing.
“jungkook! you're impossible.”
he joined you in the laughter, eyes never leaving yours, devotion so palpable and also the whispered conversations that slowly made room for more to come.
the following weeks went on, it was like the real beginning of your marriage as you both fell into a routine. mornings started slow and intimate, usually you'd wake up tanged in jungkook's chest. both of you mostly slept naked together which would cause him to end up with an even bigger morning wood. that would always lead to you both kissing lazily as he groped you all over and then with the motions of his tongue, you knew exactly what he wanted to do. it was his usual dialogue almost every day.
“let me taste you before work.”
and you couldn't deny him as his mouth started the work and every time you came so much that you lost your mind, you didn't know if you'd ever get used to him eating your pussy. each time he made sure to kiss you after your orgasm so you'd taste yourself on his tongue. other mornings you returned the favor, you loved waking him with your mouth, his cock already half hard against his thigh. you'd lick him from the base to the tip, smiling as he slowly woke up.
“shit baby!” he'd groan, one hand guiding your head, you'd learned to relax your throat like a pro after the several times of giving him head and the way he'd taught you. you wouldn't pull back until he came down your throat and he called you his good girl. you both left for work most days now after showering together, mostly full of soapy touches and kisses, his hard cock pressed against your stomach. he wanted to do more you knew but usually didn't have time. you'd stand in front of him to tie his tie as always as he watched you with a soft gaze, not forgetting your usual forehead kiss. he'd drop you off at the library.
“text me when you get to the library and eat something proper okay? i worry about you.”
jungkook had also been teaching you to drive more seriously because the last time you both got a little distracted... on weekend afternoons he'd take you out in one of his less flashy cars to empty roads or big parking lots. he was always patient and encouraging even when you sometimes messed up.
“you're doing amazing, look how far you've come already.”
his praises were constant.
“focus sweetheart or do you want me to eat your pussy right here in the car if you nail this turn?” you'd laugh breathlessly, cheeks hot but you improved fast under his guidance and he kept his words, ate you out in the car when you'd learned to park the car perfectly.
“that's my wife, so smart and capable.”
instead of avoiding his words, you started to see yourself the way he viewed you as… you believed you were smart and capable of doing so much more. you both took turns cooking or sometimes side by side, you chopping the vegetables while he handled the cooking even though the majority of the time he wanted to be the one to cook for you. bam baby would always be the most excited when he had both of you around, running around and playing some afternoons. you both would play with him, spoiling him together. it was so therapeutic.
you spent hours in the library he'd built for you. he'd sit with his laptop while you curled up with a book, your legs draped over his lap. you'd squirm when his wandering fingers would trace your skin, sometimes slipping under your shorts to cup your pussy but nog demanding anything, just holding you there like putting his to claim every inch of your body. he'd say he missed you even after you both spent a few hours apart due to work, even when the texts were constant and the calls. you'd end up with his head between your thighs more often than not, sometimes the cuddling sesh would lead him to finger you on the couch while he'd lay his head on your breasts, latching on to your nipple and kneading your breasts as you pulled on his hair. you grew closer in every way, with conversations that would last late in the night with bodies pressed together. he'd talk about his work stresses and you'd listen playing with his hair as you both learned more of each other every day, even though there were no secrets but the little things were always learned and memorized. there were playful moments too, he'd chase you around the house just to pin you against the wall and kissing you senseless, bam would join in the chase, his barks and both of your laughter filling the space.
the sex was constant but varied, mostly oral while your body adjusted but there was penetration occasionally too, him eating you out and you'd repay him with sloppy wet blowjobs. that would occasionally lead to him fucking you missionary or in a spoon position, sweet and gently at first, looking into your eyes but it always ended up turning hungry and a bit rough at the end when you both grew desperate and your body has grown used to his size slowly as well. there wasn't always much lingering soreness but tiny bits of pain were there that were fading as more time went by. he was a sex beast in bed and his stamina was crazy even though you both had sex almost every day, it felt like he could go more but he never pushed like the gentleman he was. every day deepened the bond, he was completely wrapped in you while you felt cherished and desired in everyway. the house felt more like your home, no longer a prison or somewhere unknown, a lived in place filled with giggles, moans and so much love...
“hmm... baby.”
your husband lets out a contented murmur as he nuzzles his nose against your neck taking in your scent. fully basking in each other's warmth. you and jungkook have both decided to stay home today, cancelling all the responsibilities and just needing to spend the time with each other but most importantly, there has been this palpable sexual tension building since morning. every accidental brush of skin while making coffee or those glances across the table. you also noticed the way his hand rested a little too long on your lower back as he passed by thinking you wouldn't notice but every nerve inside you was way too aware of him. it was like the air you breathed. all of it had been building something.
you were in your comfort clothes, one of his oversized t-shirts that smelled so much of him that it made you feel lightheaded and simple panties. jungkook fresh from a light home workout, only wore sweatpants. there was still a light layer of sweat glistening on his skin from the post workout. he looked so sexually attractive even at times when he was being casual and wasn't trying to initiate anything.
your legs squeezed together as both of you pretended to watch some random show on the tv, the fluffy blanket thrown around your lower bodies that he'd brought for you after deciding to be lazy together this afternoon on the couch. neither of you was paying attention to the tv. your legs were tangled with his, your head resting on his chest as his fingers traced along your thigh slowly and absentmindedly, inching higher with every pass. the touch was light but it still made your pussy tingle as your hand slightly curled on his chest from the sensations. you could feel the thud of his heartbeat beneath your cheek, it was faster than normal, it matched the way your own pulse had quickened. his free hand played with the ends of your hair, occasionally tugging gently which made you shift restlessly against him with tiny helpless noises that you hoped he wouldn't hear. you were so wanton for him and the way you were writhing made his shirt bunch around your waist revealing your tummy and panties. you were aroused and it was so evident that your panties had a wet patch in the middle and were sticking lewdly to your folds, the shape of your throbbing clit was almost visible if he looked close enough. just that both of you were doing a good job at ignoring it. the way his cock was half hard inside his sweatpants and pressing noticeably against your hip whenever you moved, he was just huge enough to always bump into you even when he wasn't fully hard. jungkook's deep husky voice broke the tense silence first as his heavy breathing fell against the top of your head.
“sweetheart... you've been squirming against me for the last twenty minutes.”
“do you think i don't notice how wet you're getting mhmm?” he chuckled softly as his fingers slipped just a little higher under the hem of the shirt brushing the edge of your panties.
“been driving me crazy all day haven't you… like a bad little girl?” you bite your lower lip, trying to hide your smile as your cheeks flush. you've been feeling every bit of the bad girl he was accusing you of being.
“it's not my fault your hands keep wandering.”
your voice came out breathier than you intended and you shifted again, your thigh deliberately pressing against his growing bulge. the sudden friction made him inhale sharply.
“fuck…” he lets out with a grunt.
“you're the one who's been hard since breakfast koo... i can feel you against my leg right now,” you add coyly. he groaned as his hand finally slid fully downward to cup one of your ass cheeks, squeezing it to his liking.
“guilty. how am i supposed to focus on anything when my wife is walking around in nothing but my shirt, looking all soft and fuckable?” his thumb traced the line of your panties, dipping teasingly between your cheeks for a moment before retreating.
“been thinking about you nonstop... especially how pretty you sound when you fall apart for me.”
he mutters hotly against your ear, his teeth grazing the lobe before letting it go. you gasped at his words, your nails slightly digging into his chest as you felt a trickle of slickness escape your panties and drip down your thigh. slowly... so slowly. just like the way he was slowly breaking you until you're reduced to nothing but the needy girl he wants you to be. you turned your face up to look at him, your noses almost brushing. his eyes were hooded, full of desire, but there was that familiar playfulness in them too. the one that always made your stomach flip with excitement. you couldn't help it and leaned in, capturing his lips in a slow kiss. it started slow but quickly turned hungry. his tongue traced the seam of your mouth, asking for entrance and you granted him a small sign of happiness. both of your tongues slide together sensually, his tongue made that sex motion that thrusting act that always made your thighs shake around him. your arms circled his neck, gripping his hair as his strong arms made your legs wrap around his waist until you were practically glued to his body with not a single inch of space between you both. his hand kneaded your ass more heavily while the other tilted your chin for better access and to eat at your mouth properly.
“ah...”
you whine into his mouth as he swallows the sound and kisses you even harder. not being able to get enough. when you finally pulled back for air, both of you were breathing harshly as jungkook pressed his forehead against yours.
“i've been thinking about something fun, you know... a little game since we're both home and clearly worked up.”
he smirked as his fingers kept brushing over the damp spot that had formed on your panties, your legs remaining parted with the way he had you pinned down as you looked up at him with parted lips. you were so deep in his spell that you barely registered his words, your eyes fixed on his swollen lips.
“what if we 69? the one who cums first loses but with a twist.. the loser has to do whatever the winner wants,” your eyes widened slightly at the suggestion as an instant thrill of nervousness and excitement went through you. the idea of competing like this with his mouth on you and yours on him sounded… incredibly hot. you both knew how skilled he was with his tongue to turn you into a sobbing mess but still the competitive side of you sparked to life. the intimacy loosened your tongue too much as you pursed your lips, pretending to think while your clit throbbed against his thigh.
“and what exactly does the winner get huh?” you asked as your hand slid down his chest, nails lightly scratching over his abs until your hand brushed over his hard cock. jungkook's hips immediately twitched towards your hand, a growl escaping him as his head fell back for a bit. his adam's apple bobbed before his eyes fixed on you darkly.
“do you wanna know what happens if i win?” you nod with a gulp, your brows furrowing as the tip of his finger slides up and down between your folds that parted beneath your panties, playing around your opening without ever crossing the barrier.
“if i win... i finally get to fuck this sweet ass of yours.”
his finger pressed against your asshole over the fabric while his other hand held you open making you let out a quiet squeal, your hips lifting off him slightly.
“do you remember what you confessed when you were tipsy that night? all those dirty things you said about wanting me everywhere, including here,” he lets out a hum as his thumb traces the shape of your puckered hole that clenches for him at the feather light touch.
“oh god...”
you panted almost embarrassed that he still remembered the way you specified wanting him to take your anal virginity. he hadn't forgotten a single word of yours and the memory already has his cock pulsing in your hand.
“only if you want it... wanna claim every part of you, gotta stretch you a lot yeah?”
“and if i win?” you ask expectantly but with a shaky voice.
“then you can do whatever you want to me… anything baby,” he clarifies.
“anything i want?” you croaked out as a shy giggle escapes you feeling the boldness rise in you even more.
“mhmm.”
the manly approving noise makes you meet his gaze steadily and you are more than sure that he can see all the deepest fantasies in your eyes too.
“i get to edge you for as long as i want, tie you up if i feel like it and bring you right to the edge over and over without letting you cum until i say so,” you stammer in a single breath, your cheeks turning a deeper shade of pink from the tension and also from how naughty even your own words sounded to your ears. to distract yourself from his intense eyes, your hand brushed over his bulge again squeezing his cock and feeling it jump under your fingers.
“i wanna see you begging for me please...” you pleaded sweetly. you wanted to be the one in control.
“yeah?” a wicked grin spread across his face after a second of surprise and the thought of you taking charge like that clearly turned him on more than he expected. he loved when you showed this side even if he was usually the dominant one. he loved the way you've bloomed since the marriage, how the first few times of intimacy you've been so nervous and scared but you're now voicing what you want and desire so confidently with no fear or insecurity at all. he lived for it and loved it so much. his dick was already giving him a hard time. hearing you say that was so damn hot, he could probably just nut from you whispering filthy things to him.
“do you really wanna edge me? make me suffer huh?” he leaned in, nipping at your lower lip before kissing you deeply again with renewed force.
“i'm so fucking hard just thinking about it.”
he grumbles against your lips, a string of saliva connecting your mouths before breaking as his hand fisted the back of your head, making you moan against his mouth.
“but don't think i'll go easy on you, you know how good i am at making you cum don't you princess?” he didn't let you speak again as his hands roamed everywhere, desperately squeezing your breasts through the shirt, then sliding back down to cup your pussy making your hips rock into him.
“jungkook...” you whimpered. you knew that the game had started already and you weren't one to back down. he already has you weak on your knees before the main thing started. you pushed his sweatpants down just enough to free his thick cock which bobbed against his stomach and wrapped your hand around his length, stroking him slowly. your thumb settled over his tip, feeling around the slit and how profusely he was releasing precum. you knew that was his most sensitive spot. you'd learned his body so thoroughly.
“keep that up and i might lose before we even start the game.”
he gruffs out as his jaw clenches hard. he landed a sharp spank on your inner thigh making you jolt with a sudden cry which he immediately soothed with rubs as the slight pain turned into bliss. you didn't know how pain mixed with pleasure could feel so euphoric and turn you dizzy but he was teaching you new things every day. you laughed breathlessly against his lips and gave him another stroke.
“that's the plan if i want to win isn't it?” he lets out a playful rumble as his fingers slip inside your panties which reduced your laughter to a gasp. he collected a bit of your wetness to bring it up to your swollen clit hidden under the hood to rub it with your slickness. your head fell on his chest as you let out a long moan, your hand not stopping pumping his cock and spreading his precum down his shaft. the room was immediately filled with the sounds of your shared heavy breathing and the wet sounds of kissing and touching each other. both of you were completely lost in the anticipation of the game ahead as he stared at you with the predatory gaze that made your heart flutter with want while his chest rose and fell rapidly.
“so we're doing this baby?” his voice was rough with arousal. he brushed a strand of hair from your face tenderly even as his other hand continued between your thighs, the tip of his finger sneakily nudging against your gaping hole but never giving you what you want.
“shit... i can't wait to have your mouth on my cock while i bury my face in this pretty cunt. you want it don’t you?” you nodded almost dumbly, feeling overwhelmed and wanting him to touch you better as you were almost gushing on his hands.
“yes… yes… please.”
both your eyes locked together as your hand tightened on his cock.
“but if i win… i'm doing what i want to you.”
he hissed through his teeth, his control slipping as his hips rolled into yours. he loved seeing you explore this side of yourself with him, just the thought of you like that made something primal stir in him… he wanted his girl like this taking what she wants, using him how she prefers.
“alright deal. the winner gets to have all the fun… but i'm warning you sweet girl, i'm gonna eat this pussy so good you'll be crying my name before you can even focus on sucking me.”
he manhandles you suddenly, making you shudder at the sheer power of him. he already positions you to his liking. he lay on his back, pulling you on top of him so your thighs straddled his face and your mouth hovered over his cock. his breath fanned over your clothed pussy, your own mouth just inches away from his heavy balls and leaking tip and your breasts squished on his thigh.
“ready wife?” he murmurs using the nickname that always makes you tremble because it was like he was setting his ownership on you with it. reminding you who you were to him. you let out another whiny whimper as his hand gripped your hips, pulling you down closer to his waiting salivating mouth. he pressed a loving kiss against your inner thigh.
“remember… don’t cum too fast or i win and this ass is mine tonight.”
you shivered at the promise and lowered your head to lick a long stripe up the underside of his cock all the way to the tip. expertly making his movements flatter.
“you're the one who's going to lose koo…”
he clicks his tongue with a snicker as his teeth grab hold of the edge of your panties, ready to pull them to the side, eyeing your cunt obsessively. like a man dying to have his last meal.
“uh huh? only time will say that…”
his dark chuckle held no sense of cockiness underneath, just seriousness that had your eyes widen in lustful fear. the game was on and none of you were going easy on the other. determined to make the other break and earn the prize. he pushes your panties to the side, your eyes on his thick cock that stood right before your face when you push his sweatpants down as well, it was throbbing with each heartbeat, the head already pink and leaking precum.
“fuck baby,” he growls. his voice held that cocky edge that made you clench as his hot breath fanned directly over your glistening folds as you shivered. he took in the sight of your cunt obsessively and the way it seemed to him.
“this pretty little pussy is absolutely leaking for me.”
you were dripping juices down your thigh, and he couldn't help but catch a droplet in his tongue that was trailing down your thigh. his hands gripped your full ass cheek as you started growing heady from his words alone and he hadn't even started yet. he spread your cheeks wide to expose every bit of you, his thumb brushing teasingly close to your puckered hole and slit alike.
“mmm..” you panted as nervous excitement went through you as you leaned forward, wrapping both of your smaller hands around the base of his cock. you felt him throb around your grip, your palms never fully meeting.
“i'm gonna try,” you whispered breathily. you had determination in your voice even though the neediness was present.
“you talk so big koo... i'm gonna edge you until you beg for release.”
jungkook lets out a throaty chuckle, the sound vibrating deliciously against your hypersensitive pussy making your hips twitch involuntarily. his fingers dug deeper into your ass pulling you down onto his waiting mouth, forcing your dipping folds to meet his hungry mouth in one motion.
“ah!” you let out a shocked moan.
“we'll see exactly who wins baby, we both know how it'll ends,” he grumbles.
“now sit on my tongue and let me taste what's mine.” he grumbles impatiently.
the instant his tongue dragged a path between your folds, you moaned loudly your nails digging into his abs and you forgot what you were supposed to do, your cheek falling on his stomach. he had this urgency in him today, not the usual way he ate you out like he wanted to win and he was set on it. your eyes fall on his cock and you immediately remember what you were supposed to do, your mouth wrapping around the head of his cock, sucking hard to engulf him. you whined at his salty taste while he tasted you like you were the drug he craved. your tongue swirled around his slit to lap up every single drop of his leaking precum as your cheeks hollowed trying your best to take him fully inside.
“shit yes just like that, damn it. your mouth is heaven,” he groaned into your pussy, nose pressing into your clit making your hips jerk forward but he held you still.
“don't run from it,” his skilled tongue flicked rapidly over your engorged clit, precisely lapping through your slick folds and the wetness you've started releasing. he sucked one lip, tugging gently before releasing it with a wet pop then alternated the sensations with teasing nibbles from his teeth around your sensitive labia.
“uh... koo!” the pleasure pain made your eyes water as you fought to maintain focus but you tried your best to bob your head lower in his cock, taking inch after inch until he nudged against the back of your head while you fought your gag instincts. you hollowed your cheeks even more, creating loud sloppy gluck gluck sounds that were obscene even to your own tears while your hand twisted around the base that you couldn't take fully inside your mouth. you gave your everything to it, also not leaving his full balls alone, cupping them and massaging them in your palm feeling them tighten further in your hands. you pulled back slightly to lick a slow trail down the underside of his shaft knowing he was extra sensitive on the underside of his cock so you focused there before sucking one of his balls fully into your mouth while your fist pumped him steadily.
“shitt!” he lets out a string of curses. you sobbed on his balls as he suckled your clit more prominently,his hips bucked upward, driving more of his length into your throat.
“fuuuck your mouth baby god—” his voice breaks on a husky noise.
“you were born to suck this cock weren't you huh? hmm?” his hips thrusted into your mouth along with his words, it was like he couldn't get enough of how it filled your throat. he watched you clench around nothing but he instantly rewarded you by plunging his tongue as deep as it could reach your hole, fucking you with it in insistent motions while his nose ground against your clit with every movement, he guided your hips to grind down. your head spun with overwhelming ecstasy, not being able to breathe on his cock as your movements seemed to slow the more he focused on your clit and tongue fucking you. he used your body like you were a toy, guiding you up and down his mouth and you were so wet that you were sliding so easily.
“mmmphh ugh i-i koo.”
you managed to garble out with a cry against his girth, tears streaming down your face, your eyes squeezing shut as your breasts pressed against his hips. your pussy remained incredibly sensitive from the days leading up to this that every single lick, suck and thrust was making you feel like you'd combust as he pulled back just enough to speak, watching your hips tremble with a smirk as he panted against you.
“c'mon grind on my face harder. use your husband's mouth like the needy girl you are.”
he dove back in with renewed ferocity this time, zeroing in on your clit, sucking it between his lips in a hard suctioning motion that had you wailing while two of his fingers slid through your drenched folds. you sputtered, eyes widening as he circled your slit spreading your wetness everywhere before pushing inside you slowly, curling upward immediately to find your sweet spot while his tongue remained on your clit.
“w-wait!” you squealed after pulling your mouth off his cock.
“i-it was ahh oh god, we're just supposed to use our mout,” his cock slapped against your cheek, splattering his essence there as well. jungkook chuckled with a snicker.
“was it? i don't remember mentioning any rules baby,” his tongue flicked your clit faster and faster, building an unbearable pressure while his fingers pumped.
“y-y-you cheat.”
you didn't want him to win especially by cheating so you redoubled your efforts on his cock, desperately not wanting to back down as you took him deeper into your throat until your nose pressed against his pelvis. you gagged but pushed through, saliva dripping messily down his shaft and onto his balls as you tugged them with increasing urgency and you let out a satisfied moan when you felt his own movements falter as he lets out a long growl into you but even though his mouth faltered, his fingers kept on going, scissoring and twisting, while you tried to pathetically find a rhythm to make him break fast. it seemed laughable now because it was obvious who was going to win anyways.
you alternated between fast sucks and tight twisting strokes of your hand while focusing specifically on the tip of the cock but jungkook was merciless even as his thighs shook. he was driving you closer to the edge and you couldn't stop yourself. the combined sensations were too much and your thighs were violently shaking around his head, your hips humping his face on their own while you made muffled noises on his cock that he seemed to like too, the vibrations of it making him thrash into your mouth. every muscle in your body tensed with anticipation, your nipples were being stimulated too from being pressed against his hard stomach. jungkook's fingers curled steadily, feeling how tight you were becoming around his fingers and he knew you needed to cum so bad he could feel it building.
“don't you dare hold back, let me drink every single drop.”
he encouraged you as your moans turned broken, your efforts growing sloppier and slower as your own pleasure seemed to wrap around you. he used his teeth to bite onto your engorged clit slightly, just enough for it to burn and for you to shatter completely while he had a smirk on his face, knowing his own ways to make you break.
“jungkook—oh my god, fuck ahh.”
the cry tore from your mouth in a high pitched squeal, your pussy gushing slickness all over his tongue and fingers in squirts that he eagerly swallowed down. you gripped his thighs hard, no longer having the energy to keep your mouth working on his cock as you quivered endlessly, your watery eyes fixed on this twitching cock that was still so hard which meant that he didn't cum, your vision blurring as you rode the peak while he gave you kitten like leaks. your juices coating his face and dripping down his neck. jungkook groaned in satisfaction, never once stopping his ministrations, drinking every drop of your release with greedy hungry sounds. his fingers paused inside you, now not moving.
“uh... mmm mmm hmm…” you made quiet whimpery noises.
“good girl, such a good fucking girl for me... gave me everything.”
he pressed a kiss against your ass cheek while you tried helplessly to pull away from the now overwhelming sensations but his hands kept you locked in place, making sure to clean every bit of you while you panted heavily right beside his cock. finally he eased his fingers out and gave you a soft kiss against your pulsing clit before slapping your ass playfully. even though he didn't cum himself, his cock was already twitching in anticipation of what was coming next as he stared at your gaping swollen pussy with hungry eyes.
“told you princess, you cum first every single time. now... what am i gonna do with my well earned prize?”
throughout the day there was too much tension between you both while he was circling you like a predator does to a prey waiting for the perfect moment but not striking yet.
you both decided to take a shower together from the intense heat that evening and your body now lay in the middle of the bed. the air was charged and also the musk of arousal which didn’t seem to fade at all. jungkook hovered above you, his hair falling messily over his forehead as he gazed down at you with those hooded eyes. his lips met yours in an unhurried kiss, the kind that started slowly but quickly deepened into something primal, his tongue stroking yours making you moan into the kiss. your hands roamed the expanse of his bare back and the subtle flex of his shoulders as he supported his weight above you.
“baby..” he starts huskily, breaking the kiss to talk against your mouth, his breath mingling with yours. he nipped at your lower lip, tugging it between his teeth before soothing it down with his tongue earning another whimper from you.
“i've been thinking about this all fucking day about playing with that pretty little ass you want it hm? you want me to play with it tonight?” his words were filthy yet laced with love that made your heart race even faster, his eyes locked on yours as one of his hands cupped the side of your face and you nodded slowly.
“tell me exactly how much you want it… my fingers or my mouth sweetheart?” your cheeks reddened, but the honesty poured out of you in a breathless tone.
“yes… god jungkook, i want it so badly, i want both… please, i can't stop thinking about it. t-take my ass tonight.”
the admission coming out of you with no shame made your pussy throb as another droplet of arousal leaked out of you and he smiled down at you with that wicked curve of his lips which expressed so many promises. most of them included endless pleasure.
“mhmm yeah?” he leaned down trailing kisses along your jawline, sucking and nibbling just below your ear then moving lower to latch into the column of your neck. his hands explored too, palms cupping your bare breasts feeling their weights, thumbing your nipples making you arch into him with a whine, pressing more firmly into him. he continues his descent, kissing a path down your stomach, pressing little kisses and leaving a trail of his saliva, his tongue coming out to circle your belly button which makes you gasp and he smiles, knowing how much you love it when he does that. he reached the edge of your panties rather than yanking them off immediately, his nose sank on the spot where a drenched spot had formed, inhaling your musky scent like he was starving. you squirmed as he stroked the fabric covering your pussy, pressing the heel of his palm firmly against your clit.
“fuckk you're already soaked through these tiny things.”
you only wore a flimsy black thong and nothing else but it was like you were wearing nothing at all from how tiny it was. your arousal coated his hands, you were dripping just from the thought of him toying with your ass and you were weeping for attention already. you squirmed beneath him, hips rolling against his hand as a whimper left you at how he didn’t give you the exact friction you wanted.
“koo… don’t tease me please,” you pleaded. you couldn’t handle it tonight, you'd been anticipating this exact moment for so long. jungkook chuckled at your words.
“i got you baby.”
his fingers hooked into the waistband of your panties and began to drag them down your legs slowly. your lips parted as the cool air kissed your exposed pussy as he tossed the soaked garment aside. he settled comfortably between your spread thighs, his hands gripping you, parting you wider for him. he leaned in pressing hot kisses along the skin of your inner thighs, alternating between nips and soothing laps of his tongue working his mouth closer to your center. finally he put his mouth on your cunt when he realized how wanton you were getting, dragging the flat of his tongue in one long stripe all the way down to your asshole.
“nghh k-koo!” you mewled instantly, your hand going down to grip his hair twisting it into your grip as he spends some time continuing his relentless assault on your pussy. collecting every drop of arousal and spreading it messily, while your thighs trembled on either side of his head as he hummed. he suckled on your clit for a few minutes building your arousal and preparing you for what was to come but he didn’t waste too much time knowing how much you needed it. he was himself excited for this new exploration with you. he pulled back just enough to reach for the bottle of lube on the nightstand that was already half finished from the number of times you both have used it earlier. he uncapped the bottle and you watched with half lidded eyes as he squeezed a generous amount on his palm, rubbing it between his fingers to warm it up knowing how important lube is for ass play and he wanted to make it enjoyable enough for you.
“oh.”
a surprised yelp leaves you as he suddenly spits right on your tight hole watching the way it drips just inside. he grabs a pillow, putting it beneath your ass positioning you with a gentle murmur, pressing a kiss on your knee so both your holes are perfectly exposed to his eyes, your thighs nearly touching your breasts.
“baby look at me,” he murmurs, cupping your face with his other clean hand so you look directly in his eyes.
“we're gonna go really slow tonight okay? this is all new for you yeah?”
“if anything hurts, you tell me immediately. promise me also you're allowed to use the safe words whenever you want,” he says in a soothing tone. you nodded, your breath already shaky.
“i promise koo, i want this… want this with you.”
he leaned in, pressing a soft peck against your lips then against your cheek.
“good girl, i'm gonna start now. is that alright?”
“y-yes.” you stammer.
“gonna get you slippery for me at first so it's enjoyable for you.”
this turned you on so much further, the way he always expressed what he'd do to you in his raspy aroused voice, it always makes your stomach fill with excessive butterflies.
“keep your thighs spread… yes exactly like that.”
he guided your own hands down your thighs so you could hold yourself open for him and once he was satisfied, his fingers started working, thoroughly spreading the warm lube and spit all over your dripping pussy lips before going lower while you panted hard. he focused especially on the puckered ring of your ass, his brows furrowing in concentration. you were so tiny and tight there and he swallowed hard, his other hand pressing on the bed in order to control himself. he used a single fingertip rotating around the rim without pushing in yet and he could feel you tensing every time he neared your entrance.
“don't worry baby, i'm not gonna penetrate yet okay?” you nodded hastily with a whimper as he circled slowly, adding a little more lube just letting you get used to the sensation of having a finger there, knowing you weren’t used to anything unknown there. you were still an anal virgin even though he did eat your ass before, this was the first time he made proper contact with his fingers so it made every sensation feel amplified and he could see you clenching constantly which caused your hole to greedily swallow some more of the lube. his eyes met yours again as he saw the nervous excitement on your face and he gave you a reassuring smile.
“relax for me yeah? i'm gonna play with this sweet cunt too so it feels good,” he rasps. your head pressed back into the pillow as you exhaled shakily, trying to loosen the tension in your muscles while his thumb continued rubbing.
“uh…” his fingers focused on your clit after parting your folds for him, causing dual stimulation, with his other fingers playing with your ass all around it, making your hips twitch as he looked down at you in awe.
“does that feel nice baby? my thumb on your clit while i get you ready?”
“yes… ahh yes.” you moaned, eyes fluttering.
he massaged and coaxed the sensitive ring to soften you for him, the feeling was so addictive even you’ve started to relax more, your ass is no longer as tense. he alternated seamlessly between your pussy and ass, dipping two fingers shallowly to gather more wetness and then spreading it back down rubbing it thoroughly around your asshole, making loud wet noises that had your head dipping into the pillow, muffled noises leaving you.
“that's it…”
he leaned closer pressing a kiss on your lower belly to relax you as his rubbing grew more insistent, keeping the pressure light but insistent, using the broad pad of his thumb to press and circle, stretching you without penetrating. he watched with hooded eyes as both your holes fluttered and glistened so much from lube and your own essence, they looked like they'd swallow his fingers and cock all at once but he gave your body time to open up. as more minutes passed by with the relentless rubs and getting the lube everywhere, he finally decided to ease just the very tip of his finger past your rim, just a little bit.
“a-ah,”
it burned, it definitely did because you weren’t used to it at all but he held it there and didn’t push any deeper right away while his thumb kept working on your clit slowly.
“tell me how it feels. is the pain too much? should i stop?” he stroked up and down your thigh, his eyes never leaving your face.
“no pain.” you huffed, biting your lip.
“its… i don’t know.. weird but good.”
it was tingling in the best way. it felt very weird like it wasn’t meant to be there but at the same time it felt so good.
“god you're so tight back here,” he lets out a harsh breath, his eyes focused on how your tight hole gripped the very tip of his finger. your legs were threatening to shut, not being able to hold yourself apart, little noises leaving you. he kept the pressure light never forcing, never pushing, just doing what your body wants and what you're able to enjoy as he spread your legs more with a slight push to keep you open and not tighten you further.
“just relax… doing so good for me… let me make it feel amazing.”
he slowly withdrew the tip only to rub his thumb around your asshole again in long strokes, stretching the rim gently outward without fully penetrating, repeating it again and again until the resistance melted as he watched the way you seemed to throb and gape, showing the pink inside of your ass. your back arched with a sob, your hands fisting the sheets beside you, already feeling hypersensitive as your body screamed for more. his fingers settle on your pussy again sliding two of his fingers at one go from how wet you were and you cried out.
“ahh hahh koo…”
he curled his finger inside your pussy while stroking his thumb over your ass, letting your ass swallow his thumb naturally inside on its own from how softened you were, now his thumb pressing a little more firmly against your back entrance.
“still good?” he checked, pausing when he realized you were getting too high on the dual sensations of being penetrated in both holes.
“talk to me love.”
“so good… don’t stop mmmh.”
you gasped, reaching down to grip his wrist, not to pull away but to feel him closer and he smiled, shifting even closer to you knowing that’s what you needed, his fingers pumping slowly while he lets you adjust to his thumb inside your ass, letting the burn fade to pleasure. the sensation of being filled in such a new way made your whole body arch off the bed as you pulled at the sheets. he leaned down immediately, sucking your clit into his mouth, tongue flicking while his thumb sank a fraction deeper barely the first knuckle. quiet little “ah mmh nghs” leave you with so many sensations together of him fingering your pussy, his mouth on your clit and his thumb on your clit, it felt like you'd cum all over his face immediately. your inner walls were fluttering more around his fingers.
“you're opening up so beautifully baby. i'm so proud of you. does it feel full?” you nodded with a sob, hips rocking a bit into his hand.
“tell me when i can move it.”
“move please…” he started giving shallow thrusts, gently pulling his fingers out of your pussy to focus entirely on your ass, coaxing your body as his thumb curled a bit this time to massage the inner walls of your ass. he found that magical spot that made your entire body jolt.
“there—oh my god right there koo!” you cried out, your voice breaking as he focused on that spot rubbing it with the pad of his thumb deep inside you, curling and thrusting as his other hand didn’t leave your clit alone at all.
“right here?”
he curled his thumb down again, making your head thrash side to side like you were going crazy as continuous moans left you.
“yes—yes,” you chant, sobbing as you drip more arousal down his thumb, your juices flowing freely, coating his hands and dripping down onto the sheets along with the extra lube he used. he watched your blissed out face with a pleased look even though he was the one pleasing you, his cock inside his boxers hard as a rock while he kept the rhythm of his thumb inside your ass. you let out a wounded whimper when his fingers faltered on your clit to focus more on your ass.
“please don’t stop touching my clit too… ahh.”
“never baby..” his hand returns to rub tight circles on your swollen clit as your moans grow louder and needier. he leans down, kissing your stomach and thighs anywhere he could reach adoringly while his thumb keeps on working inside you, making wet plunging noises.
“does my thumb feel bigger now hmm?” he coos as his thumb shifts inside you all the way inside.
“mm hmm.” you couldn’t manage to form proper words, so lost in sensations and he understood exactly how it felt for you as he twisted his thumb a bit just to feel you clench on him. he drank in the sight of your breasts rising and falling with each ragged breath and the way your stomach quivers each time his thumb is brought inside. your inner thighs and the sides of your butt were coated in essence. he growls as he feels you stretch and flutter on him. he leans upward to capture your mouth in a consuming kiss, his tongue sliding against yours sensually taking away every bit of your breath. you let out a long moan into the kiss, tasting your arousal and you let out little mewls into his mouth when he pulls back.
“you want me to try putting a whole finger inside now pretty girl?”
“yes… k-koo, p-please,” you stutter, your fingers clutching the sheets. he chuckles softly as he trails open mouthed kisses down the column of your neck, sucking lightly at your pulse point, his thumb pausing inside your ass.
“such a good wife, asking so nicely for what she needs.”
his hand goes lower, cupping one ass cheek, squeezing it and spreading you open as his thumb slides out of you with a pop making you whine, your hole gaping emptily fluttering before squeezing shut. he coated two of his fingers with another layer of lube to the hilt and pressed it back against your rim, touching it feather lightly and applying just a little pressure with one finger before pulling away. you whimper loudly, your hips rolling forward in search of more friction, the denial only heightening every nerve ending. you selfishly wanted more now that you’ve gotten the initial feeling of having something inside your ass.
“shhh, easy for me princess.” he coos soothingly, pressing a kiss on your thigh as he watches your reactions with rapt attention. your ass winks against his finger wanting to have it inside.
“hah…” you let out a frustrated whine as he feels how hungry your hole is getting for him. he held the steady pressure making your neglected pussy pulse as well.
“you want my fingers baby?” he questions cockily and you moan.
“i—i want it so much.” you sobbed out, cheeks burning with embarrassment and your need, you felt so dirty but so incredibly good and he felt his heart swell looking at the pout on your lips and your teary eyes. so he rewards your honesty by slowly sinking the tip of his middle finger inside, holding it still as you let out a moan of anticipation your walls trying to pull him deeper. he twists the finger gently to slightly to open you up.
“you're so damn tight even just around one finger.”
he grumbles pressing his forehead against yours as he watches, mesmerized by the sight of his digit slowly disappearing inside your body but he could still feel the way you're tensed up.
“breathe deep for me… in and out yes… let me slide in deeper where you need it.”
you exhale with a whimper, forcing your muscles to relax and that causes his finger to slide inside you even deeper, reaching a place you didn’t even know existed inside you making you keen. he adds even more lube, letting the liquid drip down your crack as he starts working a second finger along the first, stretching you wider slowly. loud “uh uh uhs” leaves you at the foreign pleasure and how your ass had easily stretched around both his fingers and he was knuckles deep, hitting that spot that made you feel like you wanted to run from it and also wanted more at the same time.
“how are you feeling?” he asks, his chest rising and falling as he presses his bulge down on the bed to get a little friction from how hard he was from watching you like this. he could probably just cum from watching you experience this.
“it's t-too much,” you writhed.
“want me to slow down?” he asks patiently.
“n-no move please”
he nods, moving both his fingers slowly in a pumping motion, not going too fast making the pleasure radiate outward and your pussy leak, his hand rubbing circles on your hips. he leans down, grabbing a nipple inside his mouth, sucking hard while he continues his exploratory thrusts of his fingers.
“oh god… k-koo, oh koo,” you babble, one hand flying up to tangle in his hair pushing your breast further into his mouth. he lifts his head watching you moan and squirm.
“does it feel good princess? my fingers fucking this ass open so carefully mm?” he pushes deeper then scissoring his fingers, curling them to massage and stimulate your inner walls. you were taking two of his fingers so beautifully even though he was thinking if you'd be able to take it from how tiny you were here but you opened up so well for him.
he couldn’t imagine how good it would feel when he finally slides his cock inside this tight ass of yours. you respond to his words with a hard clench on his fingers and he growls at the sensation, his cock twitching as if you'd clenched around his cock instead. he maintains the slow pace, pumping his fingers in and out while spreading the lube, your moans climbing higher as you were slowly reaching the edge but every time he pulls back almost completely before reaching back inside, drawing out the pleasure leaving you begging incoherently.
“please… i need more,” you finally whine, his fingers didn’t feel like enough and he didn’t let you release.
“i know baby, i know… i'm gonna make you cum soon,” he twists his fingers inside that special spot inside you that has your legs stuttering.
“gonna give you the butt plug now okay?” your eyes widen slightly at his words as he reaches for the medium sized black silicone plug that he coats with lube, his fingers leaving your ass, leaving a wet patch on the sheets. an uncertain noise leaves you but he immediately puts his hand on you.
“only if you want it baby. here, touch it if you want.” he encourages. he gives you the plug, letting you explore it as you watch it with hooded eyes biting your lip, wondering how it'd feel inside you.
“we can skip it if you want and i can make you cum with my fingers instead angel. no pressure.”
you took a deep breath.
“i—i wanna try, just go slow.”
he grins. you were such a brave strong girl and he was so proud of you.
“of course i will go slow, you don’t have to worry about that yeah?” he hums soothingly.
he brings the silicone and presses it firmly against your loosened, still fluttering hole from the thorough fingering he'd given you as he rubs against it, letting your ass get the feel of it first.
“are you ready?” you let out a shaky nod, taking a deep breath as he instructed, feeling the texture of the plug as the narrow tip breaches your entrance with surprising ease at first before the increasing girth begins to stretch you wider and deeper than his fingers ever had making you feel this intense fullness.
“ahhugh jungkook!” you let out a wail full of ecstasy, your toes curling as you watch your ass swallow it. he does it so slowly as to not shock you or hurt you mistakenly.
“just a little more…”
he pauses as the widest part penetrates you, and you feel like you're stretched to your absolute limit, your nails digging into his wrist, his finger going to your clit to rub it so your mind doesn’t focus on any of the little pain.
“i-it's pressing against e-everything at once,” you cried. you couldn’t even think straight as you squeezed your eyes shut tightly.
“i know my love… that’s it, you're doing so well taking it all for me.”
he presses kisses on the inside of your thigh as tears start to stream down your face at the overwhelming sensations. his free hand keeps the plug steady and with one last onward firm push, the toy seats itself fully inside you with a lewd pop, the base nestling snugly between your spread cheeks.
“uhhh, ahhhhahngh.”
you mumble out incoherent noises at the new fullness of being filled like this as jungkook groans loudly at the erotic sight, his eyes blown wide with lust as he spreads your ass cheeks to look at the way the jewel is right in between. he presses a kiss directly above the base of the plug, his breathing fanning over it watching you clench on it.
“there it is, all plugged up nice for me. how does it feel hm? i wanna hear it all.”
“so… so full and heavy, like there's this pressure inside that won't let go.”
you whimper shifting your hips experimentally and your lips part in an ‘o’ at the way it moves the plug inside you grinding against your inner spots. it feels so different than how his fingers felt but in a good way. it was like you lived for pleasure only and only existed solely for that. he made you feel like you were floating in the skies, making you feel these out of the world sensations that you wouldn’t even imagine. but you were aching from the denial wanting to cum and your desperate noises proved that jungkook didn’t need your words to understand that. your hips rolling subtly as you chase more of that friction the plug provides. he doesn't make you wait even a second longer, his mouth descending hungrily on your dripping pussy using his tongue to lick all over you, sucking on your clit to quickly bring you to your orgasm, the sensation adding up to the plug buried in your ass, making you cry out loud and your eyes rolled to the back of your head. he didn't tease at all and urgently fucked your pussy with his tongue, humming against you loudly knowing it drives you to the edge quick enough.
“koo don't stop, hah pleaseee,” you whined out, fisting his hair as you grind messily against his face chasing your edge.
“gonna make you cum so hard,” he promises and dives back, sliding two fingers back inside your pussy while his tongue works your clit, curling and scissoring and your body could barely keep up with it as you writhed all over the bed, your legs kicking around his waist and your movements kept on shifting the plug inside you. your thighs begin to tremble as the orgasm approaches you like a tidal wave ready to crash over you, your breathing coming in short desperate pants.
“please please please.” you babbled mindlessly, not knowing even yourself what you were begging for but knowing that you needed it.
“cum for me baby, let me feel this tight pussy squeezing my fingers while your ass stays stuffed.” he groans against your clit sucking hard and curling his fingers. you thought you might die of pleasure or lose consciousness when his other hand reached down to press against the base of the plug pushing it deep inside you, your mouth opening on a silent scream as you started crying like a baby as you orgasmed. your entire body seized and convulsed as the pleasure rippled through you making both your holes flutter, the orgasm lasting longer than anything you'd ever experienced before.
“jungkookkk,” you cried out his name repeatedly and he moaned in response into your pussy, licking you through it with care as his fingers continued to give slow thrusts.
“atta girl..”
he praises you just to watch you twitch once more as you collapse into a utter spent mess beneath him, your throat no longer able to produce proper words, feeling your mind go blank, the only thing you were capable of producing was his name, your legs having no energy to be out back together. he finally pulls back slowly, his face shiny with your essence, satisfaction on his face as he admires the sight of the plug inside your ass and your beautiful ruined body laid out before him.
it was indeed his favorite work of art.
“i want you to keep it inside for the whole night.”
from his words alone, you knew the night was far from over and every nerve in your body looked forward to it in anticipation.
synopsis / years of knowing ryland as one of your adjunct lecturers led to built up tension piling into one lump as you were deployed to work alongside with dr. grace, the lump now threatening to burst.
ship/ ryland grace x f!reader
cw/ 18+, smut, exhibitionism (in the lab...), soft top ryland, whimpering, age gap but both are consenting adults, missionary, making out, declarations of feelings, crying lawl, creampie, project hail mary spoilers!
wc/ 8.2k
an/ lets imagine that ryland has taught as a lecturer before in and out while teaching middle schoolers... blueish theme bcs nerdy space men yummers, alternatively you can read in ao3 here!
“Dr Grace…?”
“Dr Ryland Grace.”
Stratt reiterates, looking at you with those piercing eyes, a gaze undoubtedly her.
“You will be working alongside him so it won’t be a one man job and your lecturers have said you are one of the best students they have, straight A’s, intriguing reports and outcomes from your experiments.”
She leans back a little on her office chair, voice lowering to a more serious degree.
“You are lucky that connections brought you this far, being involved in a top secret project issued by the government is a huge feat for a student of your age, let alone shadowing one of our brilliant scientists.”
You gulped,
“So do you understand the matter at hand?”
Your clammy hands fiddled with each other on your lap.
“Yes,”
“Good, and you know what top secret means right? Say a word about this and we will have to, unfortunately, terminate you with immediate effect or worse.”
‘Or worse’ those words rang in your head as you clearly knew what she meant by that.
You then leave her office, hands shaking just a little bit as you start to process what you are getting yourself into.
Dr Ryland Grace, you remember now, he became your substitute lecturer for a module on Molecular Biology once and your class simultaneously agreed he was a quirky yet knowledgeable guy.
The only person whose eyes used to always be gently fixated on you as you explain your beliefs and opinions. Like he meant no harm and just wanted to understand your soul.
How did this man go from teaching to working for one of the most risky projects ever launched by the government?
In fact, how did you end up here?
Your lecturer came forward to you asking for help as someone asked him to introduce as many brilliant minds as he could possibly find for the government, and your foolish self thought that this was your time to shine and land your mark on a secure job for life.
Only to end up here, paid handsomely with the propaganda fed into your mind that you are going to save the world from a possible crisis in 30 hypothetical years.
But at least there is a familiar face.
–
Walking behind Stratt with her team of guards surrounding you, she stops at a lab, unlocking the door to reveal a room painted white, filled to the brim with scientific equipment. You could immediately recognise some of the equipment as you have used them before.
But your eyes lingered longer on the only person in the lab, a man wearing a white lab coat just like you with dirty blonde hair.
“This is Dr Grace, you will be working with him and assisting in samples as he tends to more important matters.”
The man hunched back over the microscope turns around quickly from the sudden entrance, locking eyes with you as he looks confused.
A sudden feeling of sentimentalism overwhelmed you.
“W-what is this…?” Dr Grace stutters.
“You will have an assistant now, one of my friend’s brilliant students. Give her some valuable knowledge as she will be shadowing you too.” Stratt tells Dr Grace as he fixes his crooked glasses.
“...Why?”
But before Dr Grace could ask any further, Stratt and her bodyguards walked out of the lab, leaving you and Dr Grace in there alone.
It was silent for a while. You could only look down and play with your lab coat, waiting for any orders from your now superior Dr Grace.
As silent as the lab was, Dr Grace’s mind was a storm. The student he taught now serves as his assistant, the same student who always had questions for him after lectures, staying back to crack problems with him and debate philosophical topics that tie with scientific facts.
The last person he could talk to about his controversial opinions and not feel judged, including the report that sent hate mail to his doorstep and caused Stratt to hire him, you did not judge.
The most down-to-earth woman he has ever met is now standing in front of him after years of no contact.
“Hey, I taught you before.” He tried to start the conversation,
You looked up to see him sheepishly grin.
“Oh yeah… I remembered.”
“Wow, how long has it been?”
“A while… I’m graduating soon.”
His eyes widened for a little bit.
“I’m old huh,” He scoffs.
“You still look as young as I remembered,” You joked, and he breathlessly chuckled .
You chuckled nervously too and as if he could suddenly sense the awkwardness in the room, he gestures to you.
“Oh yeah you’re still standing– I-I’m sorry, here.”
He stands up to push a lab chair beside him, offering you to sit.
“So… what led you here?”
“Lecturer recommendation… I had to sign a lot of forms and stuff I think I’m signing myself up for a suicide mission.”
Dr Grace’s smile faltered a little bit, but just for a moment so subtle you could catch it.
“Well it technically is, 3 astronauts are going on a one-way mission to space as there won’t be enough Astrophage to bring them back.”
He sighs,
“All in the name of saving mother earth am I right?”
You giggle nervously again as you start feeling a sense of dread and regret overwhelm you, but you try to push it away.
“I’m sorry, Stratt did not tell me I will have an assistant or whatever she said so I was not prepared at all,” He apologises,
“Its okay,” You said,
Silence plucked the atmosphere,
“What’s Astrophage?”
His eyes lit up.
“Thought you wouldn’t have asked,” He grins and you take notice of his stubble, his lazy eyes protected by his glasses that sat so well on his face.
You shook your head as if the thoughts could disperse as you stood up to follow him to another corner of the lab.
There lay a microscope, with the sample on the metal plate showing a black blob of goo smeared across.
“Try looking.” He smiles again and you lean your dominant eye to the lens.
Laying in your vision were a bunch of black molecules, moving, as if they were alive.
“...It’s a cell.” You said out loud, unsure if it's a question or a statement.
“Yes, it is a cell.” Dr Grace replies as you look at him.
“You discovered a new species of being?”
“Well n-not me, I was just sent here to research on how Astrophage behaves so we can start preparations to use it as fuel.” He looked away momentarily and adjusted his glasses. Shifting his gaze to you again, you could see his eyes dart from your lips back to your eyes, quick as if not wanting you to notice.
“...” You stayed silent.
“So it's an alien? That's groundbreaking.” You tried to keep your cool.
“Yeah, and they breed too, like any other species.” He leans his arm against the shelf as if to look like he is chill as he could tell how shocked you are.
“Now we just need 2 million kilograms of this bad boy to send 3 astronauts to their deaths.”
You scoffed as that sense of dread and regret slowly washed away.
It felt as if the dream duo had finally reunited, except now these two nerds are going to put all that philosophical debate into scientific research that could hypothetically save the world.
–
Day 3, Night
“You should go rest now”
Dr Grace’s voice bounced off the walls as the clock struck 9pm.
“I think I’m having a breakthrough—
“Thats the millionth time you said that,”
“Yes because I have a hunch that I’ve put 99% of my trust on right now,”
Dr Grace just sighs.
“Okay this is an order, rest, now.”
You took your hands off the chamber and huffed like a 10 year old having a temper tantrum. You bit your lip out of thinking what to say to that, eyes looking at him pleadingly.
He had to look at the wall behind you to stop paying attention to the way your bottom lip looks tugged below your teeth, and your eyebrows slightly crooked, eyes glossy from hours of work and exhaustion.
God he is going crazy isn’t he?
“You will be stuck in this lab for the next quarter of your life, miss,” Dr Grace exaggerates as if to coax you into having some shut eye.
“Fine, can I just lie on two chairs here or something?”
Dr Grace sighs again, louder this time.
“Sure, just go rest.”
Propping yourself on the two chairs, you formed a makeshift bed to rest on as you stretched your limbs, letting out small whines from your tense muscles finally relaxing.
Dr Grace takes over you, putting on the safety equipment as he sticks his hands into the black gloves attached to the isolation chamber, analysing the sample after an experiment you made from your hypothesis on Astrophage breeding.
Well it didn’t work and you didn’t know how to recreate the conditions Astrophage survived on in the Petrova Line. However you did discover the conditions Astrophage needed, and that was during your first few days here.
You’re just too into this project and he could feel all your hard work and dedication in making this project a successful one.
You’re just bubbling with curiosity and passion. It makes him smile unknowingly, the same smile he gets whenever his middle school students excitedly answer his questions.
Even for a project that threatens everyone involved in it to die, you still tried your best.
“Hey, I have this idea for a set up to see how they thrive in their—
Looking back as Dr Grace was rambling, he sees you sleeping peacefully on your makeshift bed, lightly snoring, noticing that you also forgot to take off your lab coat.
His heart quenches a little from the sight.
You looked cute.
But he shook that thought away, it has only been a couple of days and he suddenly feels some sort of connection to a student he developed a close bond with a while back and is 10 years younger than him? Illegal.
He just smiles softly.
Looking up at the clock it was now reaching 9:30pm.
And his eyes did feel droopy but he did not want to disturb your rest or leave you alone all by yourself.
So he took off his lab coat and made a makeshift bed for himself at the other side of the room too, with enough space to observe your sleeping habits.
The way your body shivers when the AC casts another gush of cold wind at you, your arms crossing so that your hands won’t get cold, and your body huddling up into a small cocoon to feel safe.
All of it makes you, you.
And that thought made him fall asleep gradually.
—
The days flew by since then.
Having a dorm on the ship now, you just wake up and go for work but it wasn’t so bad doing work with Dr Grace.
He wasn’t authoritative, nor does he slack, he leads you with grace (pun intended) and in a way whereby following his orders doesn’t feel forced, it just feels natural.
Even amidst a crisis, and knowing that the government is using you guys as guinea pigs to save the world, it felt as if the world spun slower whenever you’re with him.
It felt so wrong as you slowly started looking at him as less of an educational figure, but more of a comfort person and maybe now more attractive?
Maybe it's what weeks of isolation in the middle of sea does to you, but the bond you used to have with him is back, just ten times more intimate and explosive.
You are barely scraping the surface of your 20s at 21 years old and now you are attracted to a man reaching his 40s, 35 years old.
You could only roll on your bed thinking back on your findings and reminding yourself of objectives to be achieved the next working day, just to have your mind float back to Dr Ryland Grace.
The way his fingers brush against yours when passing around equipment, his woody scent flooding your senses while looking into isolation chambers to see what you are doing, or when you shadow him in his work, your eyes lingering at the way his biceps curl and his glasses slide off his nose bridge at every cute nose scrunch.
You were going crazy.
Maybe it was his nerdy charm, the way he sheepishly rubs his face after every bad joke that you still giggled at, but it's what made him, him.
—
Day 6, Morning
“What are you doing here so early?” Dr Grace walks into the lab as he brushes past your figure to put his belongings at the back.
“Math, to see how much energy we need for the Astrophage breeding process.”
You were sitting on a chair with a whiteboard marker in hand, calculating formulas, while Dr Grace put on his lab coat.
“Didn’t we agree that it won’t be an issue as Astrophage doubles its population every 8 days?”
“Yeah but they did say it's a one-way trip using 2 kilograms of Astrophage right?”
Dr Grace leans against the counter, facing you and your whiteboard a bit too closely.
“What if we can actually make it a two-way trip and have another 2 kilograms of Astrophage? Making 4?”
He looked at you with a perplexed expression, half wanting you to go further with the formula you are using and the other half wanting you to stop or it could risk you terminating.
“I actually had the same thought too after what Stratt said,”
“Right?” You looked at him with a glimmer in your eyes.
He found that so attractive.
“If we use Albert Einstein's formula of special relativity, we would need 1.5 megajoules of energy to make 1kg of Astrophage stores, so we could quite literally make more as we can already make 1kg of Astrophage in two days, imagine if we wait for the next doubling cycle and—
“You’re too passionate, you know that?”
Your head whips up to meet Dr Grace’s eyes through his spectacles, flow state interrupted but it’s okay because Dr Grace just gave you a compliment.
“Huh?”
“I used to think that I was so stupid for being in this project because I do what I do best and suddenly I’m in a project that threatens my life.”
He looks down at you with a soft smile, enjoying the sight of you looking up at him with curious eyes, the way you bite your bottom lip in anticipation of what he is saying next.
“You are a brilliant student, you know that? …I would have done the same thing as what you are doing now, questioning the norms but I don’t want you to risk your life.”
“How am I risking my life doing a math problem that could possibly save 3 astronauts.”
His eyes looked at you with a small tinge of sadness.
“Because they do not care, the government does not care.”
He said that as if he only had the dawning realisation a few days ago, and your heart drops.
He leans in closer, pulling a chair to sit beside you as you could feel his breath fan your lips lightly.
“They only cared about how fast we can breed this species just so they can carry on with the project and eventually go back to their original jobs.”
He rubs his face and chuckles nervously.
“Y-you’re just brilliant! Working for a top secret project but seriously I don’t want to lose you just because of your curiosity, though it's your curiosity that makes you special to me.”
His eyes looked more yearning now, full of admiration as they darted from your lips to your eyes.
“Dr Grace…”
“I think we can drop the formalities, right?”
The air grew thick, and the tension was too much to bear.
You started breathing deeply as if you ran a marathon but all you did was have intimate eye contact with Dr Grace as he looks like he just wants to eat you up here and now.
Unknowingly, you start slowly leaning in, and Dr Grace does too.
His hand starts creeping to ghost over your waist.
Fuck this is too much for you, what if he regrets it?
You sharply pull away as you realise the situation at hand and nervously hold the marker up again to continue on with your problem.
Dr Grace pulls away, coughs and adjusts his glasses as he awkwardly stands up to pull the chair away.
“I-I’ll… go get some coffee.”
He immediately left the lab to head to the nearest vending machine and you didn’t dare to even spare a look at him, just staring at your hand holding the whiteboard marker so tightly it might pop.
Shit, you fucked up big time.
Your eyes tear a bit from the anxiety of what could have happened just now as you unknowingly dragged the marker across the sleek whiteboard, forming forced jagged lines.
It is obvious now that you want him, and it's going to harm your reputation, and even your relationship with your superior Dr Grace.
The tears started rolling, and you don’t even know why you are sobbing.
Why did you chicken out?
—
Dr Grace comes back to seclude himself at the other side of the lab, refusing to be near you in fear that you would be uncomfortable with his presence.
That coffee run he made was so that he could go to the nearby toilet to look in the mirror and give himself a pep talk.
This is detrimental to his career.
Why would he let his own feelings surface in the workplace?
This was the stupidest thing he has ever done and that includes joining this project.
His hands clenched the sink threatening to shatter it into pieces as he pants.
How is he going to face you now? Would you guys still be friends?
The idea of losing you sends him into a panic attack so he just stops right there and then, leaving the toilet to actually grab a coffee with more espresso shots than needed to keep his sanity at bay.
Back at the lab he just did his thing while you did yours with absolutely zero conversations, which is not usual for both of you guys.
You even went to lunch without him and he could tell how much you’ve tried to avoid him. In the food bay when you got your lunch you sharply avoided him as he entered, on the way back to the lab at times, whenever he comes around, you take the longer route to avoid him, just to not have any contact with him.
And honestly? It hurts.
By the time it was the evening and it was time to clock out in two hours, Dr Grace isolated himself in the lab, barely doing any work, just staring into space.
You weren’t in the lab though.
Which worries him.
Where did you go?
Speaking about the devil, you eventually came in, and he noticed, he always notices, your eyes were redder than usual, nose blushing a cute shade of red.
You avoided his gaze to take your seat in front of the whiteboard again, putting on your lab coat and continuing off a problem you made again that this time touches on the speed of light.
Dr Grace could only look at you worryingly, eyes burning holes into your back.
He does not want to hurt you at all, never.
All he could do was analyse your body language and guess your wellbeing, he always analyses anyway.
Suddenly, you let out a light sob, dropping the whiteboard marker uncapped and then resting your head against your hands, elbows on your knees.
Light sobs became harder ones and suddenly you were full on crying.
You knew Dr Grace was behind you, yet you just didn’t care, you felt so frustrated this whole day. A mix of emotions regarding your superior and the work you have been doing, is it all worth it in the end?
You heard a light skiing sound on the floor, and before you knew it, Dr Grace had slided his chair from his side to yours, finally breaking the invisible boundary you guys have placed this whole day since that morning.
“What’s wrong?” His voice was soft, not wanting to look at you too much or else you would feel overwhelmed, but his body still faces you.
You lightly sobbed into your hands before whipping your head up to breathe and wiping your tears away with your hands.
“I…” You can’t say anything.
“Take your time, it’s okay to cry, let it all out,” His soft affirmations made you smile unknowingly and that made him smile too.
Maybe being a middle school teacher has its perks when it comes to understanding emotions and regulating one's nervous system.
You continued crying.
“This is so frustrating.” You sobbed out, breathing deeply in and out so that you won’t have a panic attack.
“Just breathe,” His words soothed you again.
You have been avoiding him this whole day and now he is comforting you while you’re having a breakdown. God you felt like an asshole.
His hand lingered behind your back, as if not knowing if you would want him to touch you or not, but seeing your current state, he gently soothed your back, making sure you don’t choke on your cries.
And that could have lulled you to sleep.
“Are you okay with this?” He asks, gesturing to his hand on your back.
“More than okay,” You sniffed, finally cooling down.
It was silent for a while, just you regulating your emotions as Dr Grace continued soothing your back gently. His hand felt so soothing, so reassuring, and suddenly your mind drifted back to the fantasies you had in your dorm about the veins in his arms but you shook your head lightly to dissipate those thoughts.
“Feeling better now?” He asks gently again,
You nodded, as you are breathing more normally now.
“I’m sorry Dr Grace.”
“Drop the formalities, its Ryland and you know it,” You chuckled,
“I’m sorry Ryland,”
That sent a shiver down his spine, he liked the way you said his name.
“Don’t apologise for your emotions dork,” You chuckled again,
“Shut up,” You whine and he chuckles.
You finally locked eyes with him for the first time since this morning, and his eyes darted across your face, your features more redder now, cheeks stained with dried up tears and lips red from biting.
You look so pretty.
Pretty even after you just had a meltdown.
Your eyes darted down to his lips too, and he noticed.
“Do you want this?” You asked,
“I do,” He said without hesitation but so nervously too,
And as you lean in slowly, his hand that was on your back slowly reaches up to cradle your jaw.
Finally, as he leaned in too, your lips caressed his lips softly. He closes his eyes, breathing shakily as if he doesn’t want to fuck this up. Your hands were fidgeting on your lap from nerves.
Slowly y'all pulled away, and even though it was just a peck, Ryland looks like he has run a marathon and your hands already felt clammy.
Sensing that both of you guys want more, his hand gently reaches to the back of your head, fingers weaving through your hair as you guys kiss again, but harder and more passionate this time.
You craned your head to the side to kiss him deeper as he whined softly, tongue feeling yours as sparks flew across his stomach and butterflies filled your tummy.
Your arms instinctively wrapped around his neck and suddenly he pulled away.
Your heart drops.
“W-wait, sorry, the blinds aren’t closed.”
Phew
He stands up to close the blinds as you follow him to his side of the lab, and he reaches out for you to straddle his lap as you guys kiss again, but this time more fervently, like there’s no time to waste.
His hands had a mind of its own, caressing your thighs through your work pants as your arms finally wrapped around his neck to play with the small hairs on his nape.
“You’re beautiful.” He mutters amidst the kiss and you giggle.
“Stop it,”
“It's true!” He gleams as his nose touches yours so intimately, before he leaves small kisses on your cheeks, leading them down to the side of your neck as you gasp.
“Dr Grace…”
That sent a spike of pleasure down to his groin.
“Hmm don’t say that,”
“Why?” You giggle breathlessly as he bit onto your neck as if to punish or award you for calling him out formally.
“You know why,” He stops kissing you to lay his forehead against yours, as if to engrain this moment into his memories permanently.
“Have you done this before Ry?”
He shakes his head.
“I had a girlfriend before, but it was only for a few months, nothing happened.” His eyes looked at you with desperation, trying to analyse how you feel.
“It’s okay, just wanted to know,” You smile,
“How about you?”
“Flings here and there, I never really had a man actually love my soul,”
I will love and understand your soul
He wanted to say that so badly but he didn’t want to scare you away, and you guys are in the middle of making out.
“I understand,”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah,”
Both of you guys chuckled as you noticed it's going to be an hour to clocking out of work.
So you initiated the kiss again, and he groaned, relishing in the feeling of how your lips felt and tongue twisting with his. His wandering hands reach up to squeeze your waist lightly which earned him a soft moan from you, that made his pants tighten just a little bit.
The whole time spent was just you and him exploring each other’s mouths, hands wandering about touching each other’s bodies so intimately as if y’all never want this to end.
“You’re so passionate, so amazing” He keeps saying as he sometimes leaves love bites all over the column of your throat, as your hands gently tug onto his blonde hair earning you small gasps from him.
Suddenly, your love bubble had to be popped when someone knocked the door, leaving you and Ryland to stop and freeze.
Out of panic, Ryland for some reason puts you under his desk, making it seem like you’re doing work while you’re off doing something else.
The awkward position made you chuckle a bit and made Ryland rub his face from how dumb he is having placed you under his desk in between his legs.
Suddenly Carl comes in.
“Dr Grace?”
“Yes?” Ryland coughs before answering,
Carl scans the room.
“Do you know where your assistant is?”
“Why? What for?”
“Stratt needs to see her now,”
His breathing laboured a bit.
And as the conversation carries on, all you could focus on was Ry’s groin right in front of you. You felt like a pervert, but you suddenly had a crazy idea.
He’s half-hard anyway from what you can tell.
Ryland’s eyes locked with yours underneath him as he said, “I think she has gone somewhere else, maybe you guys can see her another day? like tomorrow?”
He mouths out, don’t do it to you but you were so bratty and cheeky you did not care.
However you cared about consent and you mouthed to him if he wanted to continue. He bites his lip as if trying to balance the pros and cons of the situation but eventually gives in and mouthed a yes. In which you gave a mischievous grin.
Unbuttoning his pants slowly, you unzipped his fly, making sure that the sound of it wasn’t loud, and you are now face to face with his boxers which of course, had stupid science puns all over with images of triangular beakers everywhere.
His face went red and he covered it with his two hands as if it could cool himself down.
“Stratt just wants to talk to her about something regarding her position here in the project.”
“W-what about it?” Ryland stutters as you slowly pull down the waistband of his boxers.
He breathes in sharply as cold air shoots against his cock now fully hard. Fuck this is embarrassing. If he isn’t as red as a tomato now he would be so surprised
Eyes darting down he could see your eyes hazing out as you eyed his cock like it was some trophy you won and he could cum there and then.
He was thick, girthy, average length with a small blonde bush. There was a small happy trail and light veins going down his pelvis to the base. You can tell he furnishes himself once in a while.
“Confidential, just tell me where she is,”
Suddenly your tongue darted towards his slit and his eyes blew wide open as he tried not to moan loudly or cum.
“Are you okay Dr Grace?”
“Y-yeah, headache—
Your mouth finally envelops his head, sucking gently and he could only intake sharp deep breaths as if to look like he is sick.
He tried not to roll his eyes back, hands gripping the office chair for life.
“Sorry, I shouldn’t be bothering you right now,”
“N-no no, hhh it's okay, s-she is probably getting coffee or in the toilet ah—or something.”
Your wet mouth went down slowly, sucking his cock like a vacuum and he could only just shiver in his seat, holding his hips back from thrusting up into your mouth while trying to avoid suspicion from Carl.
“Okay, sorry for bothering, continue on with your work and get some early rest Dr Grace.”
“Hhm— Y-yes no worries, goodnight Carl!!”
That last phrase was a bit louder than he intended and once Carl leaves the lab twisting the door knob shut. Ryland could only roll his eyes back finally, trying to just gasp silently, in fear that Carl is still outside.
“Y-yes oh—“
You continued sucking, hands resting on his thighs as you bobbed your head.
Ryland could only look down at you as he shivered, trying not to cum so quickly.
“You’re doing so w-well— ah fudge—"
He starts getting louder as he thinks Carl isn’t outside anymore, hand hovering over your head as if debating if he should weave his fingers through your hair locks.
He did not want to force you or hurt you.
But as you moan while sucking him off, you push his hand onto your head, and that makes his hips tremble as he pushes you down fully.
That did it, he suddenly felt that band of warmth in his abdomen snap in half so quickly he didn’t even realise, and he thrusts his hips up forcefully, making you gag as he cums hard.
He could not give you a warning as he groaned loudly, letting out guttural sounds like this orgasm was forcefully pulled out of him because of you, like he got punched in the stomach.
His eyes rolled back momentarily before shutting them tightly, trying to get his bearings back by tugging your hair hard but not pulling, whole body trembling as shocks of pleasure sprinkle across his body.
You gagged and tears rolled down your cheeks, but you just swallowed everything he could give you, nails digging crescents into his pants.
As aftershocks lingered, he tried breathing in deeply but ended up whining as he felt your tongue still slobbering all over the underside while still deep in your throat.
“F-fudge you’re amazing, ahh—“ He still wasn’t cursing after you gave him the best head he has ever received (And his first ever).
His body slowly stopped trembling and his hand tried to soothe the back of your head while shivering, trying to adjust your hair back to how it was before and making sure he didn’t hurt you.
“T-thank you thank you—“ He whimpers as he slowly breathes in and out while you slowly let go with a pop.
Looking down at you with dilated pupils, you looked up at him with such an innocent smile as you licked the droplets of his arousal that were at the corners of your mouth.
“F-fuuuhdge don’t do that,” You laughed as he tried not to curse.
“Get up your knees must hurt,” His hands quickly pulled you up by your arm pits so as to have you sit on his lap, his other hand pulling up his boxers but you stopped him.
“Do you want more?” You asked him as your hands held his face so endearingly that he rubs his face against one of your palms, wanting your touch.
“Do you want more?” He emphasised ‘you’.
You nodded, and he nodded too.
His hands held your waist again as y’all made out again, tasting his own arousal in a mix with your saliva but he did not care, in fact he found that arousing.
He whines kissing you, taking his time to feel the way your lips move against his as the night comes to an end.
–
“Y-yes just like that–” You moan out with Ryland below you, tongue flat against you and his eyes fixated on every pleasurable reaction you let out with his glasses still on.
While clocking out, you dragged Ryland to your dorm in fear of any hidden cameras in the lab (which there is), and almost as soon as the door to your dorm locks shut, he pushed you against the door gently and kissed you again with a sense of urgency.
And as the kiss deepens, each of you strip off your clothes, his eager hands feeling your breasts, gently touching them like you’re delicate, while your hands smoothed down his body, and for a science teacher and doctor, he is built like the terminator.
But you love it, love the way he had small blonde hairs all over his chest, his pecs lightly forming and his biceps curling as his hands squeezed your waist. It all made you lightheaded in a good way.
Now he is deep face first in between your thighs, eating you out and gripping your thighs to spread them apart like you are gonna slip away from his grasp.
His tongue was skilled in finding your weak points as he could analyse every sound and expression you give him. Maybe it's his years of managing emotional middle schoolers and noticing every detail in every experiment he makes, but he now knows what you like.
You love when his tongue flicks against your clit before flattening out to lap across your slit, loves when he sucks your clit hard before soothing it out again with his tongue, or when he penetrates his tongue into you as his thumb rubs your clit with such intense precision your thighs threatened to clamp his head.
He moans from your taste, tongue lapping up your arousal like he’s dying of thirst, spectacles foggy and crooked on his nose bridge. You were losing your mind, it has been how long since he started eating you? You don’t know, all you could focus on was the way his moans vibrate against your clit, the lower half of his face damp from your arousal.
“Ry you’re doing so good.” You gasp out as your hands tugged onto his hair just to stabilise yourself, making him groan even more.
Looking down through your teary eyelids, he looked so desperate, eyes half lidded as all he could care about right now was getting you off the same way you did for him. The sight of him eagerly eating you out and tasting you for the first time was so heavenly you nearly came.
What you didn’t know was Ryland grinding his bare cock against the sheets, trying to get any source of friction he can against him as he indulges in you, relishing in the tanginess of your arousal as your whines bounced off the walls of the room.
You were getting so loud, and you tried to stay silent but Ryland didn’t like that and just sucked your clit even harder. All you could do was writhe against the sheets, toes curling as your eyes kept rolling to the back of your skull.
“Dr Grace– please oh,”
Not the formality.
He moaned loudly against your pussy from hearing you moan out his formal name and he began sucking your clit and waving his tongue side to side, before inserting his middle finger in you.
The feeling of his finger now slowly curling into you blew your eyes wide open as you threw your head back. Your legs were shaking, trying to clamp onto his head and kicking relentlessly, but for a teacher his strength was enough to hold you still, and flick your clit over and over again with his tongue.
“F-fuuckk”
“Language,” He jokes breathlessly as his finger is finally curling into you, eyes analysing your reactions to see where he should curl it at, and once your eyes start rolling back, bingo.
“Whoop there it is,”
“S-shut up– ahh~”
He smiles as he left one final lap across your slit which made your hips shiver, before curling against that one spot eagerly, going at a quicker pace while his eyes eat up how good you look, hair sweaty against your forehead, eyes rolling back, your tits shaking and moving with every twitch of your body, and drool leaking from the corners of your mouth letting out moans and gasps of pleasure.
Resting his cheek against your inner thigh, he grinds his cock against the sheets even harder, relishing in your pleasure. Slowly he added his ring finger inside, forcing a choked moan out of you, as your body writhes.
You then started sobbing from the pleasure and how numb your legs felt being spread apart for such a long time.
“Dr G-Grace– yes yes yes– f-fudge,”
Your eyes rolled back for the millionth time and he smiles realising you’re not cursing anymore.
“Good girl,”
His fingers sped up as he started flicking his tongue against your clit and you whined loudly from his praise and stimulation, one hand now pulling the corners of your pillow for life as the other tugged onto his hair roots.
You were crying from the pleasure and how overwhelming it felt, as Ry’s thrusts against the sheets grew harder, his precum staining them.
He groans against your clit as he starts sucking even harder if possible, his fingers curling and tugging so fast like he wants you to cum, now.
“F-fudge I’m cumming, cumming so har–
Throwing your head back, your hips thrusted up and through the ringing in your ears, you can hear Ry’s moaning growing even louder while continuously sucking your clit as you start squirting.
You kept saying ’fudge’ even amidst one of the hardest orgasms you have ever felt, as you cried and sobbed in ecstasy. His fingers still curled even harder as you tightened, his face now soaking wet with your arousal.
But he didn’t care, he just wanted to taste you and as your body writhes against the sheets, he lets you clamp his head with your thighs, his glasses now a meter away from dropping off his face as his free hand reaches down to rub himself.
He felt like a pervert, but in seeing how good you must have felt as his now soggy fingers curled in you, he came in just a few tugs, legs trembling as he came all over your sheets, groaning and relishing in the feeling of your plump thighs against his cheeks.
By the time you cooled down, your body was still trembling, and Ryland took his fingers out of you as he laps your slit gently, coaxing you from your high. He pants as if he came too and you grew suspicious, but you slowly let your legs down, wincing in pain from how numb they felt.
Your hands cradled his jaw lovingly as the fog in his spectacles dissipated slowly.
His fingers curl around the plump of your thighs as he leans his cheek against your palms.
“T-thank you,”
“What are you thanking me for, you deserved that,” Ryland says with a broken voice, but as your thigh fully extended, you felt wetness at the edge of your ass.
Ryland seems to notice that you noticed the wet patch in your sheets and hid his face against your inner thigh.
“You…”
“Yeah I… haah I’m.. sorry.” He said bashedly as you laughed, making him face you again.
“Don’t apologise dummy,” You pulled his face up which led him to crawl to you and tower above you as you gave him a small peck on his lips now wet because of you.
“I see that as a compliment.” You softly said, hands still caressing his jaw.
He tries to look away shyly as his face reddens, but his eyes still look at you adoringly.
–
You guys didn’t care that the next day had a conference meeting as your bodies intertwined harmoniously moving in sync.
Carl probably gave up looking for you a long time ago as through your blurry vision you could make out the time on your analog clock.
11:00PM
5 hours since y’all clocked out, and Ryland is now stuffed deep inside you, his trembling arms hugging your waist against his hips as he grinds slowly into you.
“You feel so good, ohh great heavens,”
His forehead was against yours, glasses still on so he could see clearly every tear you let out adjusting to his size and every time your eyes rolled back.
“Dr Grace oh–”
“Still keeping the formalities huh?” He joked and pecked the tip of your nose before groaning breathlessly as he could feel his tip slowly grind against your cervix.
“You know you like it when I call you that.”
He laughs and kisses you the millionth time.
“I do, I love it very much so stop,” He sighs as he gives a shallow thrust into you, a whine leaving your lips as your legs tremble, wrapped around his torso.
Looking down, you could see where the two of you are connected, wads of cum and his saliva from just now attached between your hips and his as he thrusts in and out.
He looks down too, mesmerised by the sight of all 7 inches of him going in you. You could almost say he is fucked dumb.
“Look at that,” He sighs as his thrusts quickened, wet squelching was heard as noises of skin slapping reverberated the walls. At every thrust he precisely hits your cervix, your arms wrapping tightly around his neck as you try not to cum.
Your eyes rolled back at times, fingers tugging onto the hairs at the back of his nape as if it could stabilise you from his thrusts growing harder and harder.
“R-Ry?” You called out as his eyes were still mesmerised by him going in and out of you.
“She’s beautiful,”
Oh he is pussydrunk.
He didn’t even respond to you as his thrusts grew harder and you moaned loudly at every sharp hit at your cervix.
“F-ffudge,” You gasp as you could feel Ryland’s breath fanning your face as he pants.
“Right now, I can feel her tightening around me, and whenever I thrust deeply hitting her cervix, she tightens even more,”
Is he drawing analysis results from the way your pussy clenches around him?
“Ryland just fuck me already,”
“And if I go in deeper,
He thrusts all the way in slowly, until you could feel his tip split into your cervix, forcing a loud cry from you.
F-fudge– her cervix tightens around my tip,” Your legs tremble as your arms hold him for life.
“R-Ry you have a Doctorate in Molecular Biology why are you drawing analysis from this–
“You feel so good, you don’t understand if I don’t talk to myself like this I will go crazy,”
His eyes finally lock with yours, forehead still against yours, and you moan softly realising how dilated his pupils are. His arms that caged your head were shivering, trying not to rip apart any seam in your pillows.
“Have I told you how much I admire you for your hard work?”
Suddenly he thrusts in hard and you moan loudly, toes curling as your hands reach down to hold his face again.
“You’re so dedicated in everything you do, you don’t even judge others for their opinions,”
His thrusts grew faster and harder as you whined, trying not to curse. Eyes tearing up from the pleasure.
“Stratt doesn’t deserve you, nobody deserves your knowledge, your expertise–
“Don’t say another w-woman’s name while you’re fucking me Dr Grace,”
He smiles bashedly, glasses crooked.
“Yes ma’am.’
His thrusts maintained a steady pace as you whined, hands sometimes clawing at his back as he groaned, eyes looking at you as always to see your reactions, how much you moan from which angle his cock hits into you.
And as soon as he finds a good angle, he curves his hips just slightly before thrusting at the same pace again, hitting that spot dead on every single time, leaving you trembling and sobbing.
His eyes started tearing too, tears dropping onto his glasses, realising you are below him connected in the most intimate way possible. His hands reach up to intertwine his fingers with yours as his forehead was still plastered against yours this whole time.
“I like you so much, you don’t get it,”
“I like you hhmn even more,”
He gasps as his thrusts grow faster, your mind slowly melting from all the pleasure as you could feel your impending release. You whined loudly as your fingers intertwined with his even more, gripping his hands for life.
“F-fudge you’re so deep,”
He moans loudly feeling you tighten, getting a sensing that you’re about to cum soon.
“Is it wrong to say ‘I love you’ this early on?” He gasps out as his eyes look at you, waiting for your answer.
“No, no it isn’t”
He sobs from the pleasure now, as well as the ache of his thighs and core as he thrusts into you quicker.
Both of you guys kept whining, noses touching while exchanging breaths.
“I don’t want this to be a one-time thing,” You sobbed out,
“M-me too, me too love–”
He suddenly groaned loudly as he felt his release coming, eyes shutting tightly, his balls tightening in intervals while he kept thrusting deeply into you, and he could feel you’re about to cum too.
His hands are now tightening around yours as he deeply breathed in and out just to not cum before you.
“I love you Ryland,”
His eyes blinked open to see yours, tears rolling down from the side of your eyes as you softly moan.
“I love you even more,” He sobs as one of his hands lets go of yours to rub your clit with his thumb, thrusting faster as you whine loudly, your free hand now tugging his hair as your eyes roll back.
“C-cumming–
You threw your head back as your back arches, whining as you got impossibly tighter around him, forcing him to lean his head against your neck, whining and whimpering, biting his lip till’ it drew blood to stop himself from cumming before you end your high.
You kept moaning his informal name, sobbing and trembling under him like a leaf, and as soon as he could see that ring of cream around his cock as he pulled out because of your orgasm, he lost it.
He cums hard, groaning loudly as he bit the junction between your neck and shoulder to not shout. His thumb still rubs slow circles around your clit as your hips gyrate around in overstimulation, and you moan silently from the feeling of his cum filling you up deeply.
You felt so full, free hand now weaving its fingers through his hair, softly scratching his scalp so as to calm him down, which worked as he breathed deeply, leaving pecks around his bite on your shoulder.
Slowly his hips came to a stop. His kisses trailed up from your neck to your cheeks and then to your nose, making you giggle from how ticklish it felt.
The night slowly came to an end, your hand caressing his cheek as he slowly pulled out, forehead resting against yours. He flips over to have you on his chest, forgetting to take off his glasses that are still foggy as he curls his arm around your shoulder.
And just like that, sleep overtook the both of you, his hand clasping yours.
ivyinkveil do not copy, translate, or plagiarise any of my works.
summary: ryland has always taken things slowly, but that changes the moment he realises his sweet girl isn’t nearly as innocent as she seems… and that he rather enjoys it
warnings: 18+ smut, p in v, graphic description of sex, submissive ryland supremacy!, begging, glasses stay on during sex, desperate ryland, kind of humiliation?? (forcing ryland to talk dirty), dom-ish reader?? creampie, porn with semi-plot
Ryland had always been an early riser.
It wasn’t down to a specific discipline; it was just how his brain was wired. He woke before alarms, before the sun had fully shown itself. He liked being up just that little bit before the world had fully begun.
Years of teaching only sharpened the habit. He allowed himself to enjoy his morning coffee on the balcony, relished in the quiet of the classroom before the chaos started, allowing himself to just sit in peace for a little while longer. Quiet, he decided, was a luxury he would welcome, even if it came intermittently.
And today was Sunday.
It was a soft morning, lacking lesson plans and half-marked papers, no rushing to beat traffic or coax half-awake teenagers into caring about cell structure. Gentle sunlight poured in through the gap in the curtains, having nowhere it needed to be, much like him for a change.
You were still curled up next to him, still asleep, your breathing slow and even. He daren’t move an inch.
His arm was starting to tingle slightly, and he was itching to reach for his glasses on the bedside table, but he remained still. He could see you well enough like this—soft around the edges, a tad blurry. It was almost like a photograph on film, one that had not quite come into focus. It was an image that would be burned into his brain for mornings to come, and afternoons, and evenings, for that matter.
He feared that if he moved to sharpen the image, it might break the moment entirely. He remained still.
You’d probably tell him off, catching him in the act. He would probably think it was odd if the roles were reversed, watching one sleep, but he couldn’t feel guilt if he tried.
His attention always seemed to bend toward you; the rest of the world would have to wait a while.
The sunlight caught your face just right, tracing along your cheekbone, softening at the curve of your mouth. You were wearing one of his old t-shirts, and it swallowed you slightly, slipping off one shoulder as he tried not to stare at the bare skin.
He thought, not for the first time, that you might be the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.
Which, scientifically speaking, was ridiculous. He could list a dozen scientific phenomena that objectively outclassed a sleepy human in borrowed clothing. Mitoses. Photosyntheses. The rings of Saturn.
But you being here was slowly dismantling his entire sense of scale on the matter.
He exhaled slowly through his nose, careful not to shift the mattress, as he recalled the previous night.
The previous night.
He had been so damn nervous.
Months of careful courting, getting to know you piece by piece and always eager for more. Shared dinners that stretched far too long because neither of you wanted to leave. Walking you home under streetlights, where conversations continued to flow so easily.
Sometimes you let him steal a kiss—or three—with him always pulling away at the last minute, insisting that he wanted to take his time. He wanted to do it right.
He was old-fashioned—not in the way people tend to mean now—but in that he believed in taking his time.
You just mattered to him. More than he cared to admit. That, tied with the fact that he was years out of practise, meant that this was even more rare.
He could not mess this up by rushing anything.
Not when the first girl he had the guts to ask out in years laughed at his terrible jokes, let him ramble through every scientific theory that caught his interest, not when your cheeks warmed at his soft compliments—especially not when his did the exact same.
He was a goner from day one. Every time he got home, he felt like he was floating. In high school all over again, with the pretty girl deciding to sit next to him in class for a change. You didn’t shy away from his personality, didn’t shrink. The knowledge that he had not ruined anything by just being himself.
He knew how easily it could happen. It had before—people brushing him off as distant, too lost in his own head to be taken seriously. He’d be damned if he let you slip through his fingers, not when you understood him so effortlessly.
So he hadn’t rushed, hadn’t pushed. There was no assumption of anything physical, no reaching for more than you were willing to give. But he couldn’t stop last night, not when you had been so certain, so soft.
It was natural with you, easy in ways intimacy never quite came to him.
All the nerves he had been holding in his stomach seemed to quiet. How could he be nervous when your legs pulled him deeper? Looking up at him with those eyes of yours as you asked him so nicely?
He knew he would give you anything you asked for in that moment—everything, actually. He’d be a fool not to.
You shifted then, barely more than a breath, but it pulled his attention back instantly. Your hand slid across his chest, fingers curling slightly in the fabric of his shirt as you turned, instinctively, toward him.
He froze, every muscle going still on instinct, like any movement might break whatever delicate, unconscious decision you were making. He could feel your weight against him, solid and comfortable. Like this wasn’t new for you, even if it was for him.
He hoped that, in time, it would no longer feel so novel to him. The fact that you were still here come morning was all the reassurance he’d done his job right.
You moved slightly against his arm again. Though it wasn’t like before, your unconscious shift still shrouded in sleep. Now you move with purpose, slowly stretching your limbs as you surface, waking in layers. Your hand slid across, your body pressing a little closer as you relaxed, settling into him once more.
He was perfectly still, not wanting to disturb you further.
Your eyes blinked open, still heavy with sleep. It only took you a few seconds of looking at him before your expression softened.
There you are.
“Hi,” you murmured, almost shy, not fully awake just yet.
“Hi,” he echoed, just as soft.
His eyes traced your face again, before he finally moved his hand. His fingers traced gently along your shoulder as you began to focus on him. Your gaze sharpened slightly as you assessed him. He seemed far more cognizant, and your lips curved into a gentle smile.
“...were you watching me sleep?”
The question, entirely fair and completely reasonable. The answer, however, deeply incriminating.
“…no?” he tried, failing miserably.
You uhuffed out a sleepy laugh, barely more than a breath as you nudged him with your foot, your smile widening. “Liar.”
You got him there.
He offered you a helpless shrug before leaning over, trying to salvage his dignity. He reached blindly for the bedside table before his fingers found his glasses. He slipped them on, pushing them up the bridge of his nose, the soft image of you coming in a little clearer. Both were equally lovely to wake to.
“Well,” he said, “in my defence—you weren’t exactly in focus.”
You laughed properly at that, your nose scrunching as you gave up on berating him. You curled yourself into his collarbone, forehead brushing lightly against his skin as you nuzzled closer to him, still amused. His arms enveloped you as they were itching to do all morning.
“Did you sleep okay?” you asked, voice slightly muffled.
“Perfectly,” he replied, although to him, it was a silly question. Even if he’d barely slept, the simple act of you being right beside him would have been perfection.
“Good,” you hummed.
Your body pressed more firmly against his, your leg sliding up just enough to tangle with his, your hand tracing absently along his chest in the soft morning glow
His breath hitched.
The warm feel of you, the way your soft thighs slide higher between his, the press of your breasts against his ribs under that oversized t-shirt…
His mind was already dipping into the memories of last night.
Images flickered behind his eyes in vivid flashes: the way you’d pulled him in with your legs wrapped tight around his hips, the breathy little sound you’d made when he finally sank into you, the way you’d looked up at him with those same sleepy, trusting eyes.
He’d tried so hard to be gentle, to take his time as he’d promised himself, but you’d been so warm and wet and eager, rocking up to meet every careful thrust until his control had frayed at the edges.
He needed to get his mind out the gutter—fast. There was no way you’d be up for that so early, but his mind circled back to your skin in the pale moonlight.
Your draping over him was not helping the situation; his body was reacting faster than his brain could. His cock stiffened fast, thickening against the soft give of your thigh, the thin fabric of his boxers doing nothing to hide how quickly he was hardening for you.
Oh, come on—seriously?
He tried to distract himself, but you felt it immediately. He knew you did, because the corner of your mouth curved against his skin in the tiniest, most wicked little smirk.
Whatever he was in for, he didn’t know, but that expression didn’t put him at ease at all.
Your lips brushed his jaw first—deliberate kisses that trailed down to the sensitive spot just under his ear. Then lower, along the line of his collarbone, slow and open-mouthed, like you were tasting the morning on him. When you pushed your knee up even higher, pressing right against the hard line of his cock, he twitched visibly beneath you.
A helpless sound slipped out of his throat before he could stop it.
You breathed a quiet laugh against the side of his neck, warm air ghosting over skin, and it did terrible, wonderful things to him. His hips jerked once, involuntarily, chasing the pressure of your thigh; he couldn’t help himself.
“Excited this morning, hm?” you teased, voice still husky with sleep but laced with mischief.
This was cruel.
He huffed, but it melted straight into a groan when your mouth found the side of his neck again—this time harder, lips and teeth and tongue working over the same spot until his toes curled against the sheets.
“I—it’s biology,” he managed, voice rough, “waking up in bed next to a pretty girl, it’s not—”
Your teeth sank gently into his neck, right where his pulse hammered, and the rest of the sentence shattered. His arm shot out across your back, hand gripping your shoulder hard.
In one smooth movement, you swung a leg over and straddled him, settling your weight right over the aching ridge of him. The thin layers between you doing absolutely nothing to dull the sensation.
You looked down at him, all doe-eyed and teasing and absolutely loving how flustered he was getting. You were still laced with sleep, but your lips curled as you knew exactly what your were doing to him.
“You think I’m pretty?”
God, you were gonna be the death of him.
His head was so foggy as you grinned down at him, loving the reaction he was giving you. Last night was all chaste kisses and whispered words.
Now, you were looking at him like you wanted to devour him.
All he could do was nod up at you, glasses slightly crooked, hair a mess against the pillow.
“Sweetheart,” he breathed, voice wrecked already, “like you—like you even have to ask.”
The flush that bloomed across his cheeks was beautiful and your grin grew even wider. You wasted no time in rewarding him with a slow drag of your hips against his, rubbing along his full length through the fabric, the friction pulled a sharp groan out of his chest.
You took the opportunity to lean down, lips brushing the shell of his ear.
“Ry…” you teased as you rocked against him again.
His hips bucked up into you, trying to chase the heat and pressure like his body had a mind of its own.
He could barely think when your thighs pressed against his hips so deliciously. He didn’t trust himself to speak clearly, worried his voice would crack further.
“T—top drawer,” he managed, his words stumbling out between quick breaths.
You pulled back with the proudest smile, clearly pleased with yourself. You pressed a gentle kiss against his lips as you leaned over to grab your reward. You stretched toward the bedside table, letting the hem of his t-shirt ride up your thighs, allowing him the devastating view of your bare skin.
You chuckled when his breath hitched at the display. He was far too easy to rile up—you loved it.
The drawer slid open with a quiet rattle. You reached in, fingers closing around the familiar box of condoms before giving it a small shake.
His stomach dropped.
Goddamn it.
He groaned, cursing himself repeatedly in his head. This was mortifying. One hand dragged down his face as reality hit him.
After so long without anyone, he barely touched the damn things. Not like he was getting anything close to action these days.
He should have remembered—there had only been two left yesterday, and you’d made such sweet, perfect use of both of them last night. You’d asked so sweetly if you could say, if that was alright, and then one thing led to another in the glow of the bedside lamp.
He should have been better prepared—god, if only—but he had been selfish last night. He gave in. He wanted to memorise every sound you made, every way your body fit against his, every breathless call of his name that was suddenly flashing through his mind once more.
Now, he would be facing the consequences.
“I–I’m sorry,” he started immediately, voice thick with apology, eyes wide behind his glasses. “I should have—I wasn’t expecting—I’m an idiot, I—”
You shushed him gently, stopping his rambling. You leaned down close again, forehead almost resting against his.
You didn’t look upset, which was a good thing?
With a gentle voice, so filled with affection despite its teasing edge, so much so that he never would have guessed the filthy words that left your mouth.
“I’m protected, Ry,” you placed one hand on his jaw, keeping your lips to his ear. “If you want… we can still…”
Surely you didn’t mean….
It took every single scrap of willpower not to combust right then and there. His brain scrambled as he caught your insinuation.
He’d be lying if he said he’d never thought about it—of course he had.
He was a man, and he was stupidly, helplessly in love with you. And, at the end of the day, biology was biology. Late at night after those long dinners, goodnight kisses that left him aching in his car, his mind wandered to the most primal thought: what it would be like to feel you. All of you.
No barriers—nothing. Just the soft and slick feeling of your skin against his.
He’d always shoved the thought away, called himself delusional, told himself it was far too big of an ask to impose on anyone, let alone you.
He’d never done that before. Not once. Not with the handful of careful, cautious flings he’d had years ago. Nothing this intimate. Nothing that held like handing you every last piece of him.
But you were offering it so willingly. Sitting all pretty on his lap like it would be a pleasure for not just him. His cock gave a helpless throb against you at the mere idea.
You chuckled at his reaction, you knew the effect you had on him.
He was nodding before he could stop himself—quick, frantic bobs of his head, glasses struggling to stay still, mouth dry.
You smiled that little smile and placed two fingers under his chin, tilting his head and forcing his dazed eyes to meet yours.
“I need words, Ry,” you whispered as your thumb brushed his bottom lip. “Can’t do it unless you tell me yes.”
You were going to be the absolute death of him.
“Yes,” he rasped, voice cracking. “Yes, I want—but only if you do. Please don’t feel as though—I would never—”
You quieted him with a kiss to the corner of his mouth, cutting off the rambling before it could spiral.
“I want to,” you murmured against his lips. “Wanna feel you everywhere.”
The groan that tore out of him was completely broken and involuntary. If that’s what you wanted, that’s what he’ll give you. Gladly.
“I’m gonna be on top, okay?” you ask, but it isn’t really a question.
He forces himself back to reality, to the fact that you are going to be on top of him. That the fantasy of you riding him is unfolding right in front of his eyes. You give him a second, a small window to object as you pull your underwear down slowly—like you think he might. Like that’s even remotely a possibility right now.
You smiled down at him as you hooked your fingers into the waistband of his boxers, eyes locked on his, a knowing smile playing on your lips that made his stomach flip.
He watched, utterly transfixed, as you tugged the fabric down his hips with aching slowness. His cock sprang free, painfully hard and already leaking at the tip. The cool morning air hit his overheated skin, he hissed through his teeth.
“Eager, hm?” you murmured as your fingers brushed against his thigh.
He opened his mouth, some half-formed protest already forming, but your hand wrapped around him before he could get a single syllable out. The sudden pressure of your palm stole every thought. His hips jerked up into your grip on instinct, and all that came out was a broken, breathless babble.
“Never—never done it like this before,” he managed, the words tumbling out in a rush. “Not—not bare, I mean—”
You pulled back just enough to look at him, your expression softening in a heartbeat.
Your hand stayed right where it was, stroking him, thumb circling the slick head in a way that made his vision blur at the edges. For one terrifying second he thought you were going to stop, that the weight of being someone’s first for something this intimate might be too much.
That maybe you’d decide he was too much.
But your cheeks flushed darker, your eyes gleaming with something possessive, and your fingers tightened just a fraction around his shaft.
“Does this mean… I’m the first?”
The thought was dizzying. You were going to be the first one to give this to him, the ultimate trust. The idea sent a jolt down to your lower belly, your breath getting heavier in your lungs as you looked at his dishevelled expression.
You stroked him again, base to tip, torturously unhurried.
“Y–yes,” he nodded. “You’re the first.”
He could barely get the words out, your hand distracting him from anything coherent.
“Hm,” you hummed, low and fond. You leaned over him until your breath ghosted over his lips. Your hand never stopped its slow, devastating rhythm on his cock.
“Better make it worth it then, don’t I?”
He was gone.
Helplessly gone.
A wrecked sound tore out of his throat and his hands flew up to grip your thighs, fingers digging. His cock throbbed hard in your fist at the words, another bead of pre-cum sliding over your knuckles. He couldn’t even form a reply—just nodded frantically, cheeks burning crimson.
You sat up and peeled his old t-shirt up and over your head in one smooth motion. It dropped somewhere off the side of the bed. Ryland’s eyes went wide, pupils blown behind the lenses as he drank in the sight of you—bare, soft, perfect—straddling his hips. His mouth went dry. He stared at the swell of your breasts, the way your nipples had already tightened in the cool air, the gentle curve of your stomach, the place where your thighs pressed warm against his.
You caught the way he hesitated, his hands hovering like he was afraid to ruin the view, and you laughed again.
“You can touch me,” you said, voice warm. “I want you to touch me.”
Gladly.
His hands found you instantly, reverent and greedy. Palms sliding up your sides, thumbs brushing the undersides of your breasts, then cupping them, feeling the goosebumps rise across your skin.
He leaned up on his elbows, mouth following the path of his hands—open-mouthed kisses pressed to your sternum, your ribs, the soft underside of one breast before he dragged his tongue over your nipple and sucked gently.
It was clumsy with his adrenaline, but you still sighed, arching into him. Your hand threading into his messy hair and scratching at his scalp in that way that made his eyes flutter shut.
He kept going, lost in the taste of your skin, the little sounds you made, even as his cock ached and leaked against you.
He could have stayed there forever, worshipping every inch of you, but you gently tugged his head back by the hair. He hissed at the sting, glasses fogged and crooked, eyes dazed and glassy as he stared up at you.
Please, do that again.
You cupped his face with both hands, thumbs stroking his flushed cheeks.
“Lie back.”
He obeyed quickly, falling back against the pillows, hands still locked on your hips.
He almost felt bad, the way you took over so easily. Surely he could be doing more, giving you more. But the thought faltered under the weight of the look in your eyes.
There was something in your expression that made his stomach flip, something that felt almost dangerous in the gentlest way. Like you were about to take him apart piece by piece.
The moment he was flat, you wrapped your fingers around the base of his cock again and gave him one long, torturously slow stroke.
“Please—” he squirmed beneath you, hips twitching.
You smiled down at him, wicked and sweet.
“If I’m the first one to have you like this, Ry,” you purred, stroking him again, even slower, “I gotta take my time.”
The look on his face must have been devastating, because your eyes darkened with pure satisfaction. He whined when you kept teasing him, thumb pressing right under the head on every upstroke, spreading the slickness until his cock glistened.
“This is cruel,” he gasped, voice cracking, head tipping back against the pillow. His thighs trembled under you. “Sweetheart, please—I can’t—”
He needed to feel you—now.
You took pity on him then, because he looked so desperate, so beautifully wrecked beneath you.
“Only because you asked so nicely.”
Thank God.
You shifted your weight, guiding the flushed, angry tip of his cock to your entrance. The first brush of wet heat against him made his breath stutter.
“Oh—God—” he choked out as you started to sink down.
The slide was slow, deliberate, and devastating. Nothing between you. Just slick, perfect heat enveloping him inch by inch until you were seated fully on his cock, your ass flush against his hips, nothing separating you at all.
“Baby—I—”
He could feel everything. Every flutter of your walls, every tiny twitch and clench as you adjusted around him. The way your body welcomed him completely, hot and wet and so tight it made his head spin. His hands spasmed at your sides, fingers digging into the soft give of your hips. He watched, transfixed, as your eyes fluttered and rolled back for a second when you rocked your hips experimentally, your walls rippling around his bare cock.
“You feel that?” you asked, voice husky, one hand braced on his chest as you rolled your hips again, taking him even deeper.
“Yes—yes, I feel it,” he gritted out, the words ragged. “I feel all of you—it’s—”
Every nerve in his body was lit up, oversensitive and raw. Nothing could have prepared him for this.
All those nights he was alone, his cock in his hand as he felt guilty about what he was doing. Images racing through his head of you like this, raw, so beautiful on top of him.
All those half-hearted imitations didn’t come close to this bliss.
“I need you to move,” he begged. “Need you to move, sweetheart, please—”
He sounded almost pathetic as he pleaded with you.
You began to ride him, rising up until just the head of his cock kissed your entrance before sinking back down, taking every thick inch again. The wet, filthy sound of it filled the quiet room. His head fell back, a moan tearing from his throat as pleasure exploded behind his eyes like fireworks. Sparks shot down his spine, pooling hot and heavy in his gut.
He watched you through half-lidded eyes, completely blissed out—your head tipped back, lips parted on soft little gasps and moans that made his cock throb inside you, the way your breasts bounced with every roll of your hips, the way your thighs flexed as you rode him like you owned him.
And you did. In that moment, you absolutely did.
“Fuck, Ry,” you breathed, leaning forward so your hands braced on his chest, nails digging in just enough to sting. “You’re so deep—”
Fuck, he knew. He could feel it.
Every thick inch of him buried to the hilt inside you, the slick, velvety drag of your walls hugging him so perfectly with nothing between you. It was overwhelming, obscene, the wet heat of your pussy swallowing him whole and clenching like it never wanted to let go. His hips snapped up on pure instinct, chasing that devastating friction, but you were the one in control, grinding down slow, making sure he felt every single flutter.
You picked up the pace then, rising and sinking with purpose. He whimpered, the sound punched out of his chest as pleasure coiled tighter in his gut. His glasses were completely fogged now, the lenses useless, but he didn’t care. He could barely see straight anyway, too lost in the sight of you above him: flushed cheeks, lips parted.
You looked like sin in the morning sunlight, and he was helpless beneath you.
“Does it feel good?” you teased, voice breathy but dripping with satisfaction as you clenched around him on purpose, a rippling squeeze that made his cock throb hard inside you. “Can you feel it?”
Can he feel it?
You were killing him.
He didn’t know where this new, wicked confidence had come from—last night you’d been soft and sweet and letting him set the pace, but now you were riding him like you owned every inch of his body.
He wasn’t complaining. Not even a little. If anything, the contrast made his head spin faster.
“Yes—yes, god, yes,” he babbled, the words tumbling out in a desperate rush. “Feels so good—been thinking about it for weeks—”
The confession slipped out before he could stop it. Your movements slowed instantly, dragging to an aching crawl until you were barely rocking on his cock, just enough to keep him throbbing and leaking inside you but nowhere near enough to satisfy.
You looked down at him, one hand sliding up to cup his jaw, fingers firm as you forced his blue, glassy eyes to meet yours.
“Weeks?” you echoed, voice soft but edged with pure delight.
He was panting, chest heaving, sweat already beading at his temples. He nodded frantically, too far gone to lie. His cock gave a helpless twitch inside you at the way you were looking at him—like you wanted to devour every filthy secret he’d ever had.
You leaned in closer, lips brushing the shell of his ear as you rolled your hips with excruciating slowness.
“Come on, don’t be shy now,” you whispered, voice dripping honey and sin. “How much have you thought about this? Be honest.”
This was mortifying.
He groaned, cheeks burning hotter than he thought possible. This wasn’t fair. This was cruel. You were sitting so pretty on his cock, pussy wrapped tight around him, and now you were pulling dirty confessions out of him like it was nothing.
He wasn’t good at this—words always tangled on his tongue around you at the best of times, and now, with you clenching around him on every slow drag, it was torture. Pure torture.
“I—I don’t know, I just—ugh, please move faster,” he begged, voice cracking, hips twitching uselessly beneath you in a desperate attempt to get more friction.
You stopped moving completely. Just sat there, warm and full of him, smiling down at him with that innocent little tilt of your head that did not match the filthy way you were keeping him buried inside you.
“I’m not moving until you tell me,” you said sweetly, like you were asking him about the weather instead of demanding he spill every desperate fantasy he’d had about filling you up bare. "
His brain short-circuited. The contrast—your soft, almost shy tone against the way your pussy was still fluttering around his aching cock—was going to end him. He was so sensitive, every tiny shift of your body sending sparks shooting up his spine, his body drawing tight with the need to cum.
“Ah—okay—since the second date,” he gasped in a humiliated rush. “Just—please, honey—don’t stop—you’re killing me here—”
You had the nerve to giggle, the sound vibrating through your body and straight into his length. For a second, he thought you were going to lean back and finally ride him properly, but you just stayed there, smiling down at him like he was the most adorable thing you’d ever seen.
Just take pity on him already.
“Long time, huh?” you murmured, eyes sparkling with mischief. “Well, now we can do this whenever you want, Ry. Just gotta ask.”
Whenever he wants?
Christ.
He swore he was going to die. The casual promise in your voice sent a fresh wave of heat crashing through him.
You owned him. Completely.
You finally took mercy and started moving again, you rode him with purpose. You moaned his name, and he could barely contain himself.
He was so sensitive, every drag of your pussy around his bare cock sending him spiralling higher, the heat of you with nothing between you driving him out of his mind. He could feel everything—the way your walls squeezed, the slick slide of your arousal mixing with his, the way your thighs trembled against his hips.
“Fuck—” you groaned, voice so gone it broke him. You leaned down, pressing your forehead to his, eyes locked on his as you kept riding him deep and perfect. “Please, Ry?—Wanna feel you.”
The polite little plea combined with the filthy request shattered what was left of his control. He came with a shattered cry of your name, hips jerking up hard as he gripped your waist.
“Baby, I'm—”
The words tumbled out, even as his cock pulsed and throbbed, spilling thick, hot ropes of cum deep inside you. Wave after wave, more than he thought he had in him, flooding you until he could feel the slick mess of it already starting to leak out around where you were joined.
His whole body shook with it, oversensitive and wrecked, glasses slipping down his nose as his head tipped back against the pillow.
You kept moving through every pulse, milking him for everything he had, whispering soft praises against his mouth until the last weak spurt finally faded and he was left trembling beneath you, spent and panting and so full of love and lust he couldn’t even form words.
Slowly, the world came back into focus. His heartbeat thundered in his ears while the rest of him felt loose and heavy. You were still straddling him, full of him, but your movements had gentled into lazy little rocks that sent aftershocks rippling through his oversensitive cock. He was still buried deep inside you, the mess of his release already starting to leak out around where your bodies were joined, warm and obscene and impossibly intimate.
Your lips were on him, sweet kisses scattered across his flushed face. One to the corner of his eye where his glasses had slipped, one to the bridge of his nose, one to the corner of his mouth that was still parted on a shaky exhale. You kissed his forehead, his temple, the flushed shell of his ear, murmuring little nothings between each press of your lips.
He was still floating somewhere outside his own body, chest heaving, but the sweetness of it pulled him back down gently. His hands, which had been locked in a death grip on your hips, loosened and slid up your back in a dazed caress.
When his eyes finally fluttered open, hair a complete disaster against the pillow, he looked up at you with pure, raw apology written all over his face.
“I’m so sorry,” he rasped. “I’m so sorry, I—I didn’t mean to—”
You pulled back just enough to meet his eyes.
“What?” you asked, genuinely confused, one hand brushing damp strands of hair off his forehead. “Ry, I asked for this. I wanted it. There’s no need to apologise.”
He huffed out a half-frustrated groan, and let his head fall back against the pillow. His cheeks burned hotter.
Of course you’d say that. Of course you’d be sweet about it. But the guilt still twisted in his gut like a live wire.
He’d come so fast. Like a damn teenager who’d never touched a girl before. He hadn’t even lasted long enough to get you off, and that was the part that stung the worst.
He was supposed to take care of you—had promised himself he would, after all the careful, patient months of waiting. He was the one who was supposed to make you fall apart, not the other way around.
He’d spilled inside you like he had zero control, like the bare feel of you around him had short-circuited every rational thought he’d ever had.
Pathetic.
He could already feel the scientific part of his brain cataloguing the humiliation: refractory period probably shot, ego thoroughly demolished.
“What about you?” His voice was still shaky, but the concern was there.
You blinked down at him, all innocent again, like you hadn’t just ridden him into oblivion.
“What about me?”
“You didn’t even—” He gestured vaguely between you, cheeks flaming. “I didn’t get you there. I couldn’t even last long enough to—”
You chuckled, as you slowly lifted yourself off his cock. The wet drag pulling off him made him twitch hard, a broken sound escaping his throat as the air hit his oversensitive length. You flopped down beside him on the mattress, curling into his side, one leg sliding over his thigh.
“Well,” you said, propping your chin on his chest and looking up at him with sparkling eyes, “we have the rest of the day. I’m sure you can make it up to me later.” Your smile turned just a little wicked. “Or maybe in the shower?”
He groaned, already turned on again, and pulled you closer, arms wrapping around you.
You were unbelievable.
The way you could go from filthy and commanding to soft and playful in the space of a heartbeat left him dizzy.
“You’re gonna be the death of me, you know that?” he muttered against your hair, pressing a kiss to the top of your head even as his body still hummed with aftershocks.
You laughed softly and tilted your face up, catching his mouth in a deep kiss that tasted like morning and sex and everything he’d been dreaming about for months. When you pulled back, your lips brushed his one last time.
“I’m gonna hop in the shower,” you whispered, voice warm against his mouth. “You’re more than welcome to join me.”
You slipped out of bed and he watched as you padded toward the bathroom. His eyes dropped to your thighs, where the evidence of what you’d just done together glistened in the sunlight: a slow, shiny trail down your skin. The sight hit him like a punch to the chest, possessive and so fucking beautiful it short-circuited whatever was left of his brain.
He was out of bed in an instant, nearly tangling himself in the sheets in his rush, cock already half-hard again just from the sight of you. You glanced over your shoulder and giggled and he followed without a second thought, trailing after you like a man who had already accepted his fate.
Yeah. He was definitely going to make it up to you in the shower.
a/n: im ovulating idk i think i blacked out when writing this. two people have asked me about creampies and this is where my mind immediately went
also sub ryland is real to me and i'll do anything to write about him being pathetic <3
hopefully you enjoyed and i will hopefully have something else written by next week so keep a lookout ;))))
