Non-Binary Fairy

Sky | 23 They/Them | INFP Soft Emo | Hipster af Starting T date 5/16/16

[obsesj-a]

[thepirateclown]

gender is a coin that everyone said was gonna land on heads or tails but i turned mine into one of those pressed pennies from the museum. it’s got a dinosaur on it

[kyraneko]

mine has a space shuttle

[bowsersex-deactivated20220424]

Middle school gay boy and lesbian who are friends and one of their parents says “you two look so cute together!”

[bowsersex-deactivated20220424]

gay and lesbian solidarity and beard flag based off of this post

[ndiecity-deactivated20241101]

"get his ass" is such an inherently funny phrase

[everyone-loves-purple]

[perce]

u know what i miss? all the bro posts

[narwhalsarefalling]

bro one *over the phone*: bro i miss those bro posts bro two: not as much as i miss your eyes bro bro one: bro

[ziprasidones]

Fuck it. *glows pink in the night in my room*

[siderealscion426]

[orbsdotorg]

This was my actual favorite part of working in a theater. People would come in and use a string of words no human had ever uttered and I’d have to be like “ohhhhkay let’s parse this out.”

[yunisverse]

When we had Moonlight: Moonshine, Moonrise, Midnight, Nightlight, Nighttime, Twilight

My favorite in recent memory, though: “The Big Sick” = “The Fat Bad”

[biglawbear]

Don’t… Don’t movie theaters have…the names of the movies… Right… There?

[gemstonechronologist]

Ah, see, the problem here is that you’re making the common mistake of assuming people bother to read anything. At all. At any given point. When in the presence of customer service worker.

[ambergrief]

it straight up smells like spiders in here

[foulserpent]

[solunar-light-deactivated202102]

Mentally I'm at the farmer's market with the love of my life, buying fresh fruits and vegetables 🥺

[bakwaaas]

mentally at a local cafe with the love of my life buying one of every freshly baked pastry so we can try them all

[neutralomensart]

Don't worry he's just taking his big dog to the dog park

[neutralomensart]

ugh

my hand has been forced

no more "cerberus is the demon version of clifford" my friends. Clifford is a well known and NOTORIOUS hellhound.

[theconcealedweapon]

[literally-a-piece-of-trash]

Ah yes, the 5 love languages:

touch starved

my parents never told me they are proud of me

i love Stuff

im so fucken tired please god just let me rest for 5 minutes

hey pay attention to me

[the-cipher-diary]

they call me profen because i be

[sandersstudies]

My husband’s job primarily employs adult men but there is one (1) teenage girl and my husband said originally he worried she might be a bit of an outcast but instead every man on the crew was like “huh guess I am a dad/older brother now.”

[sandersstudies]

She was in a car crash on the way to work one morning and called my husband to let him know she’d be late and he was like wtf guess I’m gonna be late too because I’m coming to pick you up and then he told his team and they were like I think you mean WE are coming.

[hoonkus-deactivated20230701]

Imagine you are a teenage girl probably rushing to get to work and you crash your probably new car and feel absolutely miserable and now you’ll be late to work but then suddenly in the distance a car full of all the adult men you work with just pulls up and is like “we came all the way here to pick you up” the mental image right now is fr.

[sandersstudies]

Apparently she tried to call her dad but it was 3am and he was obviously sleeping so she called my husband and he not only came to find her but fished her glasses out of the hood of the car (she’d dropped them while looking inside), drove her to the hospital, and told her to take the day off. She insisted on coming back to work so he used his lunch break to watch TV with her to make sure she didn’t doze off (concussion risk).

You’ve heard of the Mom friend but my husband is very much the Dad friend. He said when he answered the phone she said “hey please don’t be mad” and he’s never felt such powerful Fatherhood energy in his life.

[deliciouspaintthinner]

Girl: *calls for aid*

Every single dad packed into the car:

[sandersstudies]

This is possibly my favorite response to this post

[i-like-to-think-that-im-cool]

This girls father: Thanks for helping my daughter out guys

Your husband and all his coworkers:

[patronizing-deactivated20250728]

why is my teacher roleplaying with me in a formal email

[ifuc]

*pulls you closer* youre failing trigonometry

[loafed-beans-deactivated2020082]

[fedkaczynski]

What’s funny is that this actually happened. 

[allamericankindofguy-actual]

I’m unfamiliar with this story please elaborate

[fedkaczynski]

Finnish soldier gets separated from the rest of his unit but he’s the only one carrying the emergency amphetamines for the unit, takes too many and goes on a one man rampage for like 2 weeks straight giving the opposing Soviet soldiers nightmares for decades. Oh and he did it all on skis. 

[ethereal-insight-deactivated201]

Did he survive?

[loafed-beans-deactivated2020082]

Yes, during his methed up 2-3 week rampage he got injured by a land mine, travelled 400km on skis, and only ate pine buds and a Siberian Jay that he caught which he ate raw. When he made it back to Finnish lines he was taken to a hospital where it was found his heart rate was nearly 200 beats per minute and his weight had dropped to 43kg (94.7lbs).

[doctor-roman]

His name was Aimo Koivunen if you want to look him up

[misteryada]

Those are the eyes of a man who has seen god and laughed

[funnymemes-and-kinkydreams]

[rebelmeg]

I CAN'T STOP LAUGHING