midnight thoughts on house morningstar!alastor
Okay, before I sleep, I just want to talk about Alastor in House Morningstar a bit (the AMBAR-Somnus Isle era (and the next arc) of Alastor) because I got a comment pointing out how clearly anxious he is (very true sir/maam!), and it really got me thinking.
The thing is with Alastor, if it were just him, with no child in the picture, he'd be so much freer with his actions. He'd take more risks, be far more vengeful, and stop at nothing to regain his personal freedom. That's how he's operated for nearly a hundred years, and that's how he reached the pinnacle of being the strongest sinner (or one of the strongest sinners).
But in this AU, he can't only think about himself. Now he has Nathaniel. The one being he would literally sacrifice his life to save. I already touched on this in AMBAR, but it bears repeating, he would even put Niffty and Husk in harm's way if it meant staying with Nathaniel:
"And if you don’t…" Lucifer continued. "Well, I’ll just start picking off the people who helped with your trial case. There aren’t many, but you know them personally."
Alastor’s stomach twisted. His mind flashed to Niffty and Husk, two of the few who had stepped forward in court to defend his character. The thought of them suffering at Lucifer’s hands made his chest tighten. Didn’t the king’s time with them mean anything? Had Lucifer truly fallen this far?
"Now, come along, little fawn. Let’s not make this uglier than it needs to be."
"No!" Alastor barked, tightening his grip on the reins. His lips trembled. Nathaniel needed him. He knew his refusal could put others in danger, but he had no choice, his son came first.
He doesn't have the luxury of reckless freedom anymore. Every move he makes, he has to consider his son first.
If he didn't have a child, he wouldn't be this anxious about the future. He'd only have himself to look out for. But that changed the moment he had someone worth protecting. (And Nathan is still completely dependent on him)
And that translates to a lot of Alastor's actions even now: why he's civil with Lucifer in front of Nathaniel despite having a lot of negative feelings for that man. His choices directly affect his 3 yr old son, and Hell is a terrifying place for a kid like him. It doesn't help that most of the sinners have spent the last four years blaming Alastor for their misfortunes (the propaganda machine is strong, and for four years, the blame was pinned on him). He's not afraid of his enemies targeting him, he's afraid of them targeting Nathaniel because of him. (And I'm not even touching the Goetians yet, that's a whole arc after Somnus Isle.)
One of my favorite things to touch upon in this series too would be Alastor's motherhood, and hopefully I get to expand it more (probably a lot more in the next arc). But you know, I just feel for Alastor, really. He's such a compelling character to me, and honestly, that's probably why I love writing him in this universe.