Yours (Extended)
Sebastian Vettel x Reader
Words: 6.2K
Warnings: Strong language, toxic/addict parent, anxiety, angst, fluff
A/N: I've finally finished it. This was my favourite piece I ever wrote and I felt like it deserved more than I originally gave it. Please let me know what you think!
1991
"(Y/N) Come on!" Sebastian yelled as he pulled me towards the karts, my legs going as fast as they could. He passed me a bright yellow helmet and his dad helped me fasten the strap.
We climbed into the karts and I followed Sebastian around until I got the hang over it and then it became a race. I managed to overtake him a couple of times but he was far better than me already. We kept going until the karts ran out of petrol and Seb's dad said we couldn't fill them up and go again. We took off our helmets and he gave me a massive hug.
"You were so quick!"
"You were faster! You could be like Senna!" I said, his face lighting up as I spoke.
When we got home we sat on the sofa and watched old recordings of races that his dad had until we fell asleep.
1993
"Get the fucking door!" I got off my bed and ran down the stairs, realising mum had been shouting at me. Dad must've gone out. Lucky. I opened the door and Seb was stood at the door with his dopey grin, holding something behind his back.
"Mum I'm going to Seb's!" I shouted before closing the door behind me. I wrapped my arms around him as tight as I could.
"You're back! How was Italy? How was the race! I saw it on tv!" I babbled as I pulled away. He pulled a long floppy bunny teddy from behind his back.
"I got this for you!" I chuckled as my body felt with warmth. I took the bunny from him and gave it a hug.
"I shall call him Sir Floppy." I beamed. Seb told me all about his holiday as we walked back to his house. His mum called me crazy for having no shoes on, I just didn't want Seb to see my mum. She'd been acting different recently.
They said I could stay there the night if I wanted, Seb's mum went to the phone to call my mum and ask but I jumped up and rushed over to her.
"It's okay I can do it," I said quickly, picking up the phone and dialled my house.
"Hello?"
"Hi Mum, c-can I stay at Seb's tonight please?"
"Yeah whatever, stay there forever for all I care," she slurred. I went to open my mouth but she hung up. I put the phone down and sat back at the table.
"She said it's okay," I said quietly, picking up Sir Floppy and staring at him, wanting that warm feeling to come back.
Seb and I laid in bed that night after his mum tucked us in, despite Sebastian's protests, I liked it. I don't think my mum ever tucked me in before. I cuddled Sir Floppy and stared at the ceiling.
"Can I ask you something?" I rolled onto my side to see Seb facing me.
"What is it?" I whispered.
"Are you okay? You seemed very sad earlier... when you were on the phone." I stared at him, an uncomfortable feeling in my stomach, it made me feel sick. He reached out and held my hand, a small frown on his face.
"I don't-" I paused, the feeling in my stomach reaching my throat. "I don't think my mum likes me." The words spilled out, making it real in my mind. A gentle squeeze to my hand tore me from the feeling in my throat.
"Then she's crazy, cause you're the best. My mum says it all the time, and I think you're amazing too." He shuffled over and hugged me and Sir Floppy, the warm feeling coming back, my body beginning to relax.
I woke up that morning to Seb fast asleep but his hand still in mine.
1995
I ran out onto the street, leaving the door wide open and my feet shoeless. I got to the end of the street and pounded my fist on the door until it opened and Sebastian's smile faded to a soft frown.
"They said no didn't they?" his voice barely audible. I nodded, finally noticing the tears streaming down my face. He took my hand and pulled me inside and upstairs to his room, shouting to his mum that I would be staying the night. We sat on the floor in silence for a while, apart from the occasional sniffle that would escape, our fingers entwined still. The sick feeling was in my stomach again, I had been getting used to it.
"Mum said 'A lady has no place in a mans world. The lady supports, the man drives.' It's so unfair, why is it a mans world? And I'm far from a lady! Dad just said we couldn't afford it."
"It shouldn't be like this, I wish you were coming with me." A heavy pain sat in my heart at the realization. "I'm barely gonna see you anymore now," I whispered.
"I'm gonna make sure I see you every school holiday and every time I'm home. And I'll make sure you can come to races when you can! I promise that I will send you lots of letters too." I gave a wobbly smile and I threw my arms around his neck and sobbed into his t-shirt.
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To (Y/N)
Mum just told me you're coming to the next race! I can't wait to see you! I hope this letter arrives in time, otherwise this is gonna be pointless when you read it. I also overheard mum and dad talking last night, I'm sorry your mum left. I'll make sure you have the best weekend and forget all about it for a little bit. Keep your head up and see you next week!
From your Sebastian
P.S Please bring me some brownies from the bakery, I haven't had them in so long!
1996
To Seb
I hope you're having fun and winning every race! I really miss you and I feel really lonely at the moment. Mums stopped coming to see me and dad is really mad, he's screaming the house down right now. Your cd helps me drown it out, thank you for buying it for me, it's my absolute favourite. Do you know when you're next coming home? We could have a sleepover and go to the cinema and see the new Matilda film! Tell your mum and dad that I love them and that I miss them as well. Sometimes I wish they could be my parents.
Hopefully I hear from you soon!
From your (Y/N)
To (Y/N)
I'm sorry your mum is being rubbish, you deserve better. Mum says hopefully we should be able to come visit next month and you can stay with us for the whole time if you like? And I would love to go to the cinema, I'll make sure to re-read Matilda before I come back. I really miss you too, everyone I race with is nice but it's not the same as hanging out with you. I've found some more cd's for you and I really think that you'll like them. Mum and dad say they love you more and they miss you so so much. I'll try and call you later in the week, we've been getting home so late I've been having dinner then going straight to bed.
From your Sebastian
1997
To Sebastian
Is it true you aren't coming back this summer at all? I thought we were going to go camping? We've been planning this for months! You know I've been saving up for a tent for us. You haven't called in two weeks, what did I do? Do you hate me? I miss you, everything sucks here. Please just write back or call.
From your (Y/N)
---------------------------------------------------
"(Y/N)! Phone!" Dad called from the bottom of the stairs. I jumped off my bed and bolted down the stairs as if my life depended on it, snatching the phone off my dad and pulling it into the coat closet and closing the door, making sure not to get the cord stuck in the door.
"Sebastian?" I said out of breath as I sat down on the floor.
"I just got your letter I don't hate you I promise!" he practically shouted down the phone.
"Where have you been Seb? Why can't you come camping? You just disappeared!"
"I'm really sorry, I've been super busy lately and I haven't had the time to write and mum lost her mobile and nowhere round here sells them. Dad gave this guy at the pub a tenner so I could call you off of his phone." I let out a small chuckle, I think I missed his mum just as much as I missed him. "Mum said we don't have the time to be able to fit the trip in now but she promised next time we come home we will. I'm trying to convince her to bring you here for a couple weeks."
"I hope so, I really miss you."
"I miss you too, I've got to give this guy his phone back now he's getting shouty. I'm writing you a letter now I just needed you to know I didn't hate you! See you soon!"
"Bye Seb."
1999
The home time bell rang and I packed my books into my bag before trudging my way out of the classroom. I walked behind Mathilda and the trio of sheep that are practically clones of herself. They were all giggling away about the sleepover they were having tonight, the one that she made sure to tell me I was definitely not invited to, not that I was expecting an invitation, but I knew she was telling me to hurt me. I wasn't hurt I guess, I mean it would be nice to be invited to a sleepover for once but I'd rather stay at home alone than be ridiculed all night by the wicked bitch of the west.
I kept my head down as I walked out the gates, hoping Mathilda wouldn't notice me so I could walk home in peace but a tap on my shoulder caused me to let out a large sigh, really for her barrage of insults. I turned around and all of a sudden I thought I was dreaming.
"Oh my god!" I screamed before jumping into Sebastian's arms, being twirled around like something out of the movies. A chorus of giggles made my body go cold and the beautiful reunion felt ruined. Seb put me down and I looked over to see Mathilda and the others laughing and pointing at me. That horrible feeling returning to my stomach.
"Hey Seb, we're having a sleepover tonight, wouldn't you rather hang out with us rather than that loser." I did everything I could to make sure no tears filled my eyes, not wanting to give them any satisfaction.
"Nah, I'd rather not spend my night with a raging bitch and her spineless groupies," he retorted before grabbing my hand and pulling us away. I almost couldn't look away at the shock on their faces, I stuck my middle finger up at them and we both erupted into a fit of laughter.
"Thanks mum," Seb and I said in unison as his mum served us our dinner. I'd accidentally called her that once a couple years back, I tried to apologise but she just gripped me in a bear hug and told her that I could call her that if I felt comfortable. She was more than a mum than mine was, I hadn't seen mine in years.
Seb and I caught up as we ate, it was more him telling me everything he had been up to, I didn't really have much to fill him in on. My life had become so mundane I didn't want to tell him that my life basically revolved around school and watching F1 on the weekends.
After dinner we were allowed to set up the tv cart in Seb's room and we used some brooms and poles we found around the house to create a canopy of sorts with a sheet over the bed. Seb let me choose the film so I picked The Addams Family.
"You're not a loser by the way," I glanced away from the tv, I couldn't tell if Seb was being genuine or just pitied me. I shrugged my shoulders and brought my attention back to the film. "I mean it (Y/N), she's just saying it because she's jealous." I rolled my eyes and let out an involuntary laugh.
"Jealous of what? My broken home? The fact that I have one friend and I only see him once every few months?"
"She's jealous because you're ten times prettier than her and looks are all that matters to her."
"Don't be stupid, I'm not-"
"Yes you are. Of course you are, you're the prettiest girl I've ever seen! You're practically a princess!"
"You're just saying that cause you're my friend."
"I'm telling you cause I mean it, and others think it too. I overheard some guys talking about you while I was waiting for you to come out of class." I could feel my cheeks starting to heat up. He thinks I'm pretty? I didn't really know what to say so I just shrugged my shoulders again. Seb chuckled and took my hand in his. "You're too modest, if you actually looked at yourself in the mirror for once, you'd see it too."
2002
Sebastian Vettel is online
Seb: Hey princess! How was last day of school?
Me: Another year down, one more and I can be done with school forever!
Seb: I thought you were going to college?
Me: I don't think I can, dad's working so hard he'll end up dying of exhaustion sooner or later. I'm gonna get a job so I can help.
Seb: I'm sure mum and dad would be happy to give you guys some money if it means you can stay in school
Me: That's kind but there's no way I'm taking money from you guys, you need it more if you wanna be an F1 driver.
Seb: I'm sure we could do both
Me: Honestly it's fine, I can't wait to get away from school. How's you anyway?
Seb: I'm not giving in about it but it's a discussion for another time. Guess who went on their first date today!
Seb: Hey, you still there?
Me: How was it?
Seb: It was good, went to the cinema and to this place called Nando's. You'd love it, they do the best chicken wings there.
Seb: Oh I also got my first kiss!
Me: That's great. Dad needs my help, talk soon.
(Y/N) is offline
2003
(Y/N) is online
Seb: How was prom? You're back earlier than I would have thought?
Me: It was okay. How's everything with you?
Seb: Molly and I broke up but I think it was for the best. Why was it just okay? What happened to you and Michael having your fairy tale night?
Me: Not much of a fairy tale when all he wanted was to try and sleep with me.
Seb: What a dick. I'm sorry.
Me: Is what it is, if he wasn't such a demanding creep I might have.
Seb: Are you okay? Did he hurt you or try to force himself on you?!
Me: Kind of but a heel to the balls put a stop to it pretty quickly. I'm fine though, I should've seen it coming but he left with Mathilda so I'm sure he will have a good night if he can get it up.
Seb: I'm proud of you, my warrior princess. Are you sure you're okay though?
Me: I'm fine, I stole a bottle of dads whiskey, my own personal after party
Seb: Go grab the phone from the landing
Me: Why?
Seb: I may not be there but I'm not letting you party on your own.
2004
I stood with Sebastian's parents as he crossed the line, everybody was cheering and clapping, none as loud as me though. He had absolutely dominated the season and had won the Formula BMW Championship. I watched and cheered as he stepped onto the top of the podium and held his trophy high.
I helped his team start packing up while I waited for Sebastian to get back, we were going to a cool hilltop we found to have a couple of sneaky drinks to celebrate his season. After about hour or so I asked his mum where he was and she suggested I go have a look around for him.
I walked around for a little bit, weaving in and out of people until I spotted his messy blonde hair in the distance. I started to speed up so I could finally congratulate him but I came to a grinding halt when I saw the brunette pushed up against him, their lips pressed together and her hands tangled in his hair.
I bolted back the car, the sick feeling that I was oh so acquainted with returning to my stomach. A few tears escaped my eyes as I sat on the grass behind the car. I wiped them away with my sleeve and took a deep breath, not really wanting to have a breakdown over a boy in the middle of a car park. Although it wasn't the first time I'd had a breakdown about this boy, and I unfortunately knew it wouldn't be last.
"(Y/N)?" I took another deep breath and put on my best smile as I stood up and brushed myself off, forcing the lump in my throat down.
"Congratulations Schnell." He smiled and pulled me into a hug. I gave him a pat on the back before pulling away and standing back a couple steps.
"So what next for you?" I asked crossing my arms across my chest.
"Formula Three and try to impress people to move up."
"You don't need to try, you're naturally amazing, soon enough big people will start to take notice." He chuckled and shook his head, his bright blue eyes lighting up.
"Sebastian?" We turned around to see the brunette girl standing there, twirling her stupid curly hair around her stupid finger.
"Shit yeah, we've got to go. Julie and I were going to go celebrate," The giddy grin on his face made the feeling in my stomach worse, I thought I was going to throw up any moment. "but mum and dad will take you home, okay?" I nodded, knowing if I opened my mouth again I wouldn't be able to hold back the tears, or worse. He waved to me as they walked away, Julie glancing back at me with a smug grin. As soon as they were out of sight I turned around and leant against the car as I began to sob.
"Is he ready yet? I thought you two were going to that hill?" his mother called out as she walked over to the car. I turned to her, wiping my tears around quickly, she immediately wrapped her arms around me and held me close as I began to cry again.
"Boys are idiots. He's thinking with the wrong muscle and he will realise soon enough."
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To: (Y/N)@gmail.com From: [email protected]
Hey princess, you wanna hang out today? You've been silent recently... Thought we could go to that hilltop and have those sneaky drinks? I haven't seen you since the race and I have to leave again soon.
Your Seb
To: (Y/N)@gmail.com From: [email protected]
(Y/N)? You all good? No one is answering the phone and you haven't been online in days. Please talk to me.
Your Seb
To: [email protected] From: (Y/N)@gmail.com
I'm fine. Can't hang out. Why don't you take Julie?
(Y/N)
2005
I tried calling Seb's phone multiple times, my chest feeling tighter every time it went to voicemail. I sighed deciding to leave a message, trying my best not to cry.
"H-Hey Seb," my voice immediately cracking. Great. "I- um, Mum's downstairs in the living room, turned up outta nowhere. Demanding I spend time with her, be a part of her life and get to know her boyfriend Konrad." Tears now streaming down my cheeks, feeling like I was seven again. "I just don't know... fuck, I'm sorry. Hope you're okay." I hung up immediately and threw my phone onto my desk. He could be in any country. Why call him? So stupid.
Dad's voiced echoed though the house as he shouted at mum, it was almost as if the walls were shaking. I put Seb's cd on and turned it up loud, sitting on my bed with Sir Floppy in my arms, trying to stop the walls from collapsing around me. Every breath I took stung, getting stuck in my chest. At some point I made it onto my side, each breath hurting more and more. I don't know how long I laid there, it was if I was paralysed, in my own painful hell.
I could feel someone gripping my shoulder, gently shaking me. The music got quieter and the top half of my body was lifted and rested against someone's chest.
"Just breathe princess, I've got you. In and out okay, just copy me." The sound of his voice immediately brought the smallest bit of warmth to my body, it didn't feel real. I thought I was so far gone I was imagining things to try and soothe myself. I tried to focus on the breathing, in and out. In and out.
"There you go, you're doing so well."
I took a while but I finally felt like I could function, I slowly sat up and turned around to see him sitting there. Real.
"How are you here?" My voice barely audible.
"I'd just gotten back, I was in the taxi and didn't hear my phone, I heard you voicemail and came straight here."
"I'm sorry, I should've never-"
"What called me? Why not? It's what I'm here for, okay? I'm sorry I didn't get here sooner." He pulled me closed and we sat next to each other, our backs against my headboard. "Want me to stay the night? We can make a bed fort and watch Matilda?"
2006
To: (Y/N)@gmail.com From: [email protected]
I hope you're okay. Has your internet and phone been shut off again? I've told you I can help you out with it, I really don't mind. Mum said you've been round there lots, she never stops talking about you.
Did you get to watch second practice? I set the fastest time! ...and I may have gotten a fine for speeding in the pit lane. I set a record for it though! Quickest penalty into an F1 career, pretty impressive if you ask me ;)
I hope you can come out and see a race soon, you'd love it! I really miss you, I don't actually remember the last time I saw you. When I get back I promise we will go do something together, go karting or camping. Or both!
Can't wait to hear from you.
From your Sebastian
P.S If you see Julie tell her to write me, she broke her phone last week
To: [email protected] From: (Y/N)@gmail.com
Dear dickface
No my internet and phone are just fine. I’m too busy working my arse off to pay my rent and bills and I don’t want your fucking pity money.
Glad at least one of us is thriving though. Soon enough you’ll be so famous you’ll forget I ever existed and you and Julie can go run off into the sunset. And we both know you’ll bail out of our plans as soon as Julie gives you all her attention again.
Fuck you. Fuck Julie. Fuck off!
From ‘your’ (Y/N)
Dear Troublemaker
No my internet and phone are just fine, some of us don't get the chance of earning above minimum wage. I did see! You're becoming the next Schumacher. You're lucky you're a decent driver or they'd never let you in an F1 car again.
Let me know when you're home and I'll see if I can get the time off work.
I'll tell Julie if I see her.
From (Y/N)
To: (Y/N)@gmail.com From: [email protected]
Decent? What happened to naturally amazing?
I'm back in three weeks so tell your boss now! Please let me help you out a little, just so you can stop working so much that you can answer my emails. I know you're gonna say no so we will talk about that when I'm back.
Thank you, she's been really quiet recently and I don't know why. Do you think I should be worried?
From your Seb
2007
Sebastian Vettel is online
Me: Guess who decided to send me a fucking wedding invitation
Seb: I don't know? Mathilda?
Me: God no, although that does sound like something she'd do just to uninvite me the the day before. My mum...
Seb: Seriously? Who the fuck would want to marry her? That Konrad guy?
Seb: Sorry that was rude
Me: Don't be, that woman's a raging cunt, and that's an understatement. She's marrying a guy called Darren... God knows what happened to Konrad. I think she only sent it to try and upset dad.
Seb: You gonna go?
Me: Fuck no
Me: Actually maybe I'll turn up in a wedding dress
Me: Maybe not, then I'll be as mental as her
Seb: I don't think that's possible
Seb: I miss you.
Seb: You there? Or did you internet cut off again?
Me: I miss you too, when are you next home?
Seb: Two weeks, movie night when I'm back?
Me: If we have time, I'm sure Julie will want to see you.
Seb: If I can get hold of her.
Me: Things still a bit off?
Seb: Speak of the angel, she's calling. I'll message you later.
Sebastian Vettel is offline.
2008
I sat on the floor of my kitchen, staring at the cracks in the paint on the wall as the dial tone droned through my ear.
"Hey!" Seb said cheerfully
"Hey, just wanted to say good luck! First race of the season, gonna break some more records?" He chuckled, I could practically hear his smile.
"I'm gonna try. You better be cheering me on, everyone knows you have the loudest cheer in Germany."
"I always do."
"I've got to go, Julie and I are getting breakfast quick before we have to go to the track. I call you later though." I sighed and said a quick goodbye before hanging up, wanting to throw my phone across the room but I knew I couldn't afford to replace it.
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To: [email protected] From: (Y/N)@gmail.com
Dear Sebastian
Congratulations Schnell! Another record, youngest pole sitter and race winner. You're unstoppable.
Sorry I couldn't see you when you came back to visit. Dad's really sick at the moment and it's not looking good. I tried calling mum but she doesn't care. I wish I'd seen you, I was just scared he would go if I left him. We were cheering you on though. Seeing you win really cheered him up.
Good luck next weekend Baby Schumi ;)
From your (Y/N)
P.S Your mum says to call her more! And if you get the chance call me too.
Sebastian's POV
He's gone.
I reread the text ten times before my brain could even begin to process everything. I pressed the small green button and listened to the dial tone, beginning to doubt she was going to pick up.
"Hi." Her voice was a broken whisper.
"I'm so sorry princess. Are you okay?" I rolled my eyes knowing that was the dumbest question I could've asked.
"I don't know. I'm all on my own now."
"You have me. Is there anything I can do?"
"Keep breaking records." I let out a small chuckle and a watery chuckle escaped her throat.
"After the last race next weekend I will come straight back and help you with everything. I'll get Julie to drop by a care package for you to get by until then."
"You don't have to do that I'm okay. But thank you Seb... for calling."
"I'm always here for you."
2010
Your POV
A loud knock at my door woke me up with a jump. I looked over at my clock to see it was just gone six. I grabbed the Red Bull hoodie Seb sent me and threw it over my head and I plodded over to the door, opening it to be greeted with sad, broken, blue eyes.
"Seb? What's-" He grabbed my arm and pulled me into a tight hug. We stood there for a moment before I brought him inside, closed the door and lead him into the living room. I sat on the sofa and he laid down, resting his head in my lap. I ran my fingers through his knotty hair, gently untangling it.
"Julie and I broke up. She's been seeing this other guy for the past year, I'm not around enough so it was easy for her." I looked down at him, my brain creating a million different thoughts. Deep down there was a part of me that was happy, and I knew how wrong that was.
"I'm sorry Seb, she didn't deserve you. You deserve the someone who is always there, supports you, cheers you on while you dominate the track. You deserve the world and you'll be okay. It just takes time that's all." Sebastian looked up at me and give me his best attempt at a smile.
"Come with me to the next race, Please."
"Of course."
2011
It was nice having Sebastian around for the summer break. The first week he spent at home seeing his parents, I was there over there often but that wasn't unusual, it had always been my second home.
Sebastian insisted we went away for a week and we ended up going to Bali. It was absolutely beautiful and I'd never been somewhere so peaceful. For once I felt relaxed and happy.
We had spent the day swimming in the ocean and lounging on the beach. I laid on my towel soaking in sunrays as Seb climbed out of the ocean after cooling off as best he could.
"Do you remember when we first went karting?" he asked lying down next to me, brushing the sand off his feet.
"Of course, you could barely keep me behind you." He rolled his eyes and laughed.
"Sure, if you say so..."
"Why do you ask?" He looked over at me, his beautiful blue eyes locking with mine and his fingers slipping between mine.
"You've always been there for me, supported me and my dream more than anyone else. You've supported every decision I've made, even the stupid ones. I should've realised what has been right in front of me this whole time and I'm sorry it took me this long."
"Seb-" He took my cheeks in his hands and pressed his lips to mine, my hands resting on my cheek and in his hair. As we pulled apart he rested his forehead against mine. His smile so big you'd have thought he'd just won another world championship.
"Me and you, yeah?" I smiled and kissed him again.
"Me and you."
2012
"You should just move in." I turned around from the stove and stared at him. "What? You should," he said with the same dopey grin he's worn since a child.
"You want me to move in?"
"Well why not? There's no sense in this place being empty when I'm away and you're not with me, plus it means you can stop paying rent to your dick of a landlord." He moved closer and gently pulled my arm, bringing me into his arms. "Move in with me princess," he whispered in my ear before pressing a kiss to my neck.
"Okay," I whispered back, pressing my lips against his. I could feel him smiling against my lips. He lifted me up, my legs wrapping around his waist. He began to carry me out the kitchen and I gripped onto the doorframe.
"Seb dinner-" His lips against mine cut me off and I let go of the doorframe.
"I'll order a takeaway."
2013
I walked into the kitchen and turned the kettle on while Seb set out suitcases down. Brazil had been filled with excitement and chaos but now we were just exhausted and I was excited to get Sebastian to myself for a little while now that the season was over.
I brought in our mugs of tea into the living room, Sebastian slumped on the sofa, flashing me his mischievous smile. I placed the mugs down and he pulled me into his arms.
"How did I get so lucky?" he asked pressing kisses to my neck. I smiled and pried him away from my neck and kissed his lips.
"If you're lucky, I won the lottery." He chuckled and took my hands in his. "I've got a kind, thoughtful, funny, extremely talented boyfriend," A small blush began to appear across his face. Fuck he looks so hot. Stay on track. "Who is going to be an amazing father."
His face dropped in shock and his hands instinctively went to my stomach. I smiled and nodded, his face immediately beaming with joy and began peppering my face with kisses.
"What do you think it'll be? Actually it doesn't matter. Do you think they'll want to kart? What colour should the nursery be?" I chuckled as he kept excitably babbling any question that came to mind.
2017
I rolled over, the usual warmth absent from the bed. I glanced over at the baby monitor to see the crib was empty. I climbed out of the sheets and put on my dressing down and slippers. As I walked downstairs the sound of giggles and faint pangs grew louder. I leant against the doorframe of the living room to and watched as Seb held our baby girl while trying to catch the twins running around with pans on their heads and waving wooden spoons at each other. I chuckled and Seb turned his head and his dopey smile.
"Good morning my princess," He walked over to me and wrapped an arm around me. I pressed a kiss to his lips before pressing one to our daughters head.
"You're in a chirpy mood this morning." He smiled and pressed another kiss to my lips.
"So I was thinking, have some pancakes, get showered and dressed and then... go to the beach?" The twins began hitting each others pans with their wooden spoons while chanting 'beach'.
"It sounds like that's the plan."
Once we chose our spot on the beach, the twins began to build an army of sandcastle's around us while the three of us sat under the beach umbrella, keeping the little one out of the sun.
"You know sometimes I wish we got more moments like this. I feel like I'm missing out on so much." I looked over at him, he was looking down at our daughter while she grabbed onto his finger.
"Once she gets a bit older we can all come with you a bit more often. But you know I'm with you whatever you want to do." I entwined my fingers with his and pressed a kiss to the top of his hand.
"I love you so much, I really don't deserve you."
"You deserve the world."
2020
The door slammed shut and a bundle of feet stampeded down the stairs. I popped my head out of the kitchen to see an exhausted Seb sat on the floor with the kids squeezing him with hugs and our puppy tried to lick his face.
"Why don't you guys go get your pj's on and we will be up in a minute, okay?" A chorus of complaints erupt, causing the dog to howl along.
"Listen to your mother," Sebastian said sternly, standing up. The room went silent and they plodded up the stairs. Seb pulled me into his chest and held me tight. I wrapped my arms around his waist and we stood like that for a couple of minutes, enjoying each others embrace.
"I got fed up and I snapped," he mumbled into my hair.
"People don't blame you, they're on your side. Why should you stay quiet when they're not. They're talking and treating you like a piece of shit. You aren't staying there next year so fuck them. Don't doubt yourself my love," I pressed a gentle kiss to his lips. "You deserve the world Sebastian, I tell you that all the time. You've finally started realising it for yourself."
I pressed another kiss to his lips before leading his upstairs to the children's rooms. We read them all a story and tucked them in before they begged for one more story.
We curled up on the sofa with a bottle of wine and stuck a movie on. Seb rested one arm around my waist, his fingers tracing circles on my hip.
"I'm so glad I have you," I turned my head and smiled giving him a kiss. "Y'know I had a huge crush on you when we were kids. I used to get so excited when your letters would arrive or when one of us would visit."
"Are you serious? Why didn't you say anything?"
"Why didn't you?" he asked raising his eyebrows causing my cheeks to heat up. He chuckled and pulled me into his lap. "I was always away racing and everyone would always tell me that you were the prettiest girl in school and they were right. Every time I came back you got more beautiful. You wouldn't have wanted to date someone that was barely around when you could've had any guy you want and he could be there whenever you needed."
"Your mum was right, you are a complete idiot." His smile morphed into true confusion. "You were all I wanted. You have been ever since I was six! You were the kindest, funniest guy and you were always there for me, even when I would ignore your messages because I was jealous. You treated me like a princess and to be honest you ruined my expectations of men." I said giggling.
"Well I'm glad I got my head out of my arse." he chuckled and pressed his lips against mine.
"It took you long enough." He rolled his eyes and kissed me again.
"You know you said you always wanted four kids..." I raised my eyebrows and blushed at the dopey grin he flashed before picking me up and carrying me upstairs.
We didn't what the future held at all but we had each other and we knew we'd be okay.
Buy me a coffee if you'd like :)
