Svasti

a shrine for soft catastrophes

[dyikipedia]

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA inangyan!!!!!! nakalimutan kong cancer sun pala to si gago kaya medyo ganyan siya hahaha medyo may pa throwback lagi

anyway, maganda voice ko pero mahiyain lang HAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAA

[perriaeyjeve]

[solarsyrup]

the unimaginable power of saying "huh, guess that's not for me" and moving on with your life

[dyikipedia]

08152026 | momma’s hoooooome!!!

back in biringan!!!

it’s so hard talaga kumuha ng ticket from pilar kasi laging pabago-bago ang sched ng fastcraft…. dapat 12pm kaso no byahe daw ng 12pm so namove ng 3pm.

pero before going to Pilar, di na kami nakasaglit sa SM since 9am aalis na daw kami from Legazpi to Pilar. so nagpa-grab ako ng pasalubong na dapat bibilhin ko sa sm.

ah namiss ko magpa-grab hahaha. i bought yung miss na miss kong CHOCO BTN sa dunkin and FOUR CHEESE FLATBREAD NG SBBBB and other pastries kasi wala ngani ganito sa biringaaaan.

took bonamine and i endured the raging sea. it was kinda scary pero nakatulog lang din naman ako para akong dinuduyan e.

maraming bata sa loob fastcraft kaya amoy mo yung suka sa fastcraft tanginaaaa HAHAHAHA sorry sa kumakain habang binabasa to lol buti 2hrs and 15mins lang buong byahe. fast talaga kasi nga fastcraftt

pero nakauwi na rin kami sa wakas! i miss my baby so muchhh!! miss na miss ko anak ko 3 days lang ako wala huhuhu

i am thankful for this trip! sobrang nakakapagod kasi nagmamadali kami palagi ang hirap magcommute di na ako sanay since may car lagi kasama pag bumabyahe.

[dyikipedia]

putangina naman ng internet namin!!!! ang ganda ganda na ng pagkasulat ko dito sa tumblr about someone meeting me on a deeper level shit, tapos unsuccessfully pa na post anak ng pukinangina!!!!!!!! minsan na nga lang ako makaisip ng ganon!!!

dapat pala talaga i-sulat ko muna sa notes app tapos i-post ko dito para di sayang HUHUHUHU nakakaiyaaaaaaaaaak

haysssssss

anyway, just a context, ano. ngayon alam ko na kung bakit ako nafall sa person na ‘to before. kasi gets niya ako. we somehow met beyond the surface, he saw me on a deeper level. nakikita niya ako beyond my pretty face… charot… and that’s why he’s special. and i’ve been looking for that kind of connection elsewehere pero, wala e. pero gets ko na. that’s why i thought he was my totga.

[dyikipedia]

ahhhh had a whole body massage after that long ass trip! saraaaaaap i feel like i have a whole new body. rejuvenatedddd. charot!

plusssss, worth it talaga bumili ng foam kahit super mahal. mine’s from Mandaue Foam, and the quality of comfort you get is just superb. kahit saang hotel ka pa matulog, iba pa rin talaga yung higa sa sariling kama. kasi i’ve had this shit in my lower back na iniinda ko na even before i had my baby. narerelieve naman siya with my lumbar pillow, pero syempre hindi ko naman dinala sa Legazpi, so ayun… sumakit talaga nang bongga ang likod ko. good thing nagpamassage na ako kay Ate Em — THE BEST THERAPIST IN TOWN! ✨

ngayon feeling ko na-reset buong katawan ko. back to life, back to civilizationism! charot.

[dyikipedia]

08142026 • Dinner

aftermath of our FDA seminar. sakit ng paa ko dito, heels pa more! HAHAHA kung alam ko lang na super casual nung iba sana nagsneakers na lang ako pero keri lang. ganda ko kaya.

pero u know what? ngayon ko lang narealize… sa almost 3 days namin sa Legazpi, HINDI KO MAN LANG NAKITA YUNG MAYON!!!!!!!! like??? nawala sa isip ko na may Mayon (THE MT MAYON) sa Legazpi… pero si Mayon talaga ang hindi nagpakita (masama ata ugali kasama ko.. charot!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA)

yung picture ng Mayon is actually from the resto where we ate.

cute kasi libre yung food namin nung company na pinagkukuhanan namin ng gamot since nasa Legazpi yung office nila. 🥹 so technically, Mayon sighting through a restaurant picture na lang talaga HAHAHAHAHA.

speaking of resto, supeeeer sarap nung seafood soup nila!!! idk ano tawag hahaha pero ang sarap!!!!!!!!

overall, it was a nice experience kahit sakit paa ko kasi di ngani sanay magheels… pero next time seminar na ganito, di na ako magheels huhu

[hiveswap]

[Doesnt do it] [gets stressed] [gets scared thinking about doing it] [doesnt do it because it's scary] [keeps not doing it]

[dyikipedia]

08142026 • FDA Seminar

foodtrip while gaining certificates lol

first time ko umattend ng seminar na hindi online, so i think i was a little overdressed—but is it really me if i’m not overdressed? charot, para bang fashionista talaga shaaa?

pero srsly, nakapantalon and sneakers sila, tapos sabi sa email “wear professional attire,” kaya nervous pa ako if professional enough ba tong suot ko. ayun, naka-heels pa ang bading!

overall, such a fun little FDA seminar experience—learned a lot, got my certificate, ate good food, and of course, served a little too much professional realness.

[dyikipedia]

and just like that, the 1,000 years i had to wait were finally over.

[dyikipedia]

i just realized, i’ve finally made peace with my 2023 self.

before, parang nagtatampo pa yung 2023 version of me sa lahat ng nangyari. i was at my prime. i was enjoying my life sooo much, then boom—unplanned pregnancy, so many people i ghosted, and a version of myself that i barely recognized after everything changed.

for the longest time, i felt like lisa rowe—the chaotic, impulsive, self-destructive girl who was so caught up in her own hurt that she didn’t know what to do with it. but i don’t think i need to be her anymore.

then after talking to this guy who i thought was my totga, i suddenly realized… i don’t really want him anymore.

the 2023 version of me wanted him. she romanticized what we had. she was sooo marupok, and maybe she needed to believe that there was still something unfinished between us.

but the woman that i am now don’t want to be her again.

because when we reconnected, i realized that what we actually had was a beautiful friendship. and maybe it only felt like something more because we were young, lost, and holding onto the idea of what could have been.

today, the bond that we used to share is still there. the friendship that we had before. and for the first time, i’m genuinely okay with that. hanggang dun lang pala talaga.

maybe i matured. maybe i finally learned to stop confusing nostalgia with love. maybe i finally know what my purpose is, so i’m no longer looking for pieces of myself in other people.

and i realized… wala pala sa kanya yung happiness ko. hindi ko naman pala naiwan sa kanya yung isang piece ng sarili ko.

nasa akin naman pala talaga the whole time.

i just had to become someone who was no longer looking for it.

and maybe that’s the real closure: realizing that i don’t need him to be my what-if anymore.

i’m okay that we’re just friends.

and for the first time, that doesn’t feel like settling.

it feels like peace.

[theselfcarelifestyle]

Sometimes you just have to say ‘okay brain, that’s enough’

[dyikipedia]

08132026 | Legazpi, i’m here!

had to attend an fda seminar here in legazpi, so we had to travel a day early.

i’m here with our pharmacy head, and after the long trip, we were so hungry we ended up at Tokyo Tokyo. i was craving miso soup lately, and it definitely hit the spot. cravings satisfied!!

went shopping at uniqlo because i’ve been dying to get a windbreaker-type (uv protection kineme) jacket. i wasn’t sure about my size, so i’m actually glad i got to try it on and buy it here instead of ordering online. also got some cute clothes for my baby, of course.

this is my first time being away from my baby, and i’m not gonna lie, it feels so weird. i was so relieved when she just smiled at me during our videocall because i genuinely don’t know what i would’ve done if she cried. 😭 the internet at home is unreliable too, so she was a little blurry on the call, but seeing her little face was enough.

also my first time sleeping without my baby beside me. surprisingly, i slept SO well—even with the hotel aircon malfunctioning in the middle of the night. maybe my body just really needed the sleep.

it felt nice, but motherhood never really leaves your mind. even while i was enjoying myself, i kept thinking about my little girl. can’t wait to go home to her!!!

[sunnfl0w3rr]

mutuals if I like your vent post I promise I’m acknowledging your post and sending happy thoughts and hoping your ok bc I don’t know what to say and I promise I’m not happy you’re in pain

[wetheurban]

I hope you find someone whose voice softens because it's you they're talking to.

[dyikipedia]

got a seminer to attend, so a little pampering was necessary✨

[wetheurban]

Being chosen and loved by someone who is at peace alone is so special. They don’t need your presence to fill a void. They genuinely value it.