that bi in the trees

there's a 80% chance i'm in a tree right now Lauren | 19 | she/her | Arizona

[stoneroses]

[beverlyhillsmom]

the article just got better as i kept on reading

[manafromheaven]

A WHOLE RAW POTATO THIS STILL KILLS ME

[vamptoll]

This is the future tumblr staff wants

[moniquill]

[jpechacek]

Nobody called me but I showed up anyway.

[yashas-strong-arms]

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[rosereturns]

things said in majority of movies:

“I TRUSTED YOU!!”

“she’s not just some girl!”

“I should have told you this a long time ago.”

“I’m not a little girl anymore!!”

“but I love him!!”

[snorlaxlovesme]

-“You’re giving up your dream!”   “No dad, I’m giving up YOUR dream.”

[fruityculture]

“I knew your father. He was a good man.”

[lacefuneral]

*girl walks downstairs*

Guy: Wow… you look… great.

[somatatesthesis-blog]

Thats an entire movie right there

[dajo42]

the new d&d sidekick mechanic is so fucking funny

any monster of cr1 or lower can be your friend who is either a warrior, expert or spellcaster

like yeah hey this is my literal fucking lion he knows vicious mockery and loves me

[dajo42]

whats up my names meginara the tiefling warlock and this is my awakened shrub who can pick fucking locks

[dajo42]

hey guys you remember that boy king we freed from bandits and subsequently befriended? well i thought our team could use more damage so i taught him how to use a battleaxe. yes i know hes seven. its perfectly legal. hes the king and he says so

[kidzboppizza]

Imagine the raw energy of Depression vs. Anxiety that would happen if Bo Burnham and John Mulaney did a show together

[flutejesus]

music translation: 3rd clarinet and 2nd trombone duet

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

tony: im in target do you need anything

peter: oh just pjs i guess

tony: okay

-

peter, staring at airplane ownership papers in his hands: pjs as in pajamas, mr stark, not private jets, what the fuck,

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

peter: they just cancelled my favorite show!

tony: which one lol

-

peter: oh nvm theyre filming the new season!

peter, after reading that tony paid nbc & the actors to keep the show going: MR. STARK WHAT THE FUCK

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

peter, unassuming child: id die for dominos rn

tony: *makes a phonecall*

peter, immediately recalling the two jets he doesnt even know what to do with or where to fucking keep or how to not get killed by aunt may because of them: ONE PIZZA. ONE. NOT THE WHOLE ENTIRE FRANCHISE OR I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD,

tony, looking guilty: *hangs up*

[pasdecoeur]

# same energy

[penguinedward]

The difference between Dad Energy and Daddy Energy

[edgebug]

cat sounds, rated

mrow?: inquisitive. timeless. succinct and to the point. 8/10

purr: is there anything better? 10/10

silent judgement: not a cat sound. does not count. 0/10

mow-wow-wow!: exuberant. joyful. a frank delight. you should be so lucky as to hear this cat sound on a regular basis. 9/10

AAAAAAAA: obnoxious. loud. why is my tiny bastard screaming? 3/10

rrrrrrrrrrrrr!: your cat is angry. this is a bad cat sound, but ultimately necessary so that you understand their displeasure. 5/10

mrrrp: cat activation noise. melodic. flawless vibrato. short and sweet. 9/10

the classic yodel: everyone loves a good yodel. shows off your cat’s vocal range. emotional. plaintive yet hopeful. showstopping. 8.5/10

the classic yodel after 1 AM: no!!!!!!!! -10000/10

[queenstylinsxn]

Reblog if you’re bisexual, support bisexual people or are actually a bunch of tiny velociraptors in a human suit

[catchymemes]

[picsthatmakeyougohmm]

[5nkc7hdrl-deactivated20180324]

[cr-familiar-faces]

Windex isn’t carbonated 

[cr-familiar-faces]

[blackcatfemme]

But….. the scent………………

[asskylosaurus]

They’re both windex. I’ve been drinking it for years to build up an immunity

[iicarys]

[catchymemes]

[pervocracy]

are you ready for my favorite fact?

If you leave a hamster wheel out in the forest, wild mice will come and run on it.

that is my favorite fact

[blueelectricangels]

Bobcats and lynx will sit in cardboard boxes abandoned in the middle of the forest.

I asked the lynx researcher who told me this why, and he said “Cats, man” and shrugged.

[mynamebatman]

This is now an “if I fits, I sits” appreciation thread.

[kawuli]

Stones Have Been Popping Out of People Who Ride Roller Coasters

Using centripetal force to prevent a $4 billion healthcare cost

1. Doctor finds anecdotal evidence that people are passing kidney stones after riding on Big Thunder Mountain Railroad at Disney World

2. Doctor makes 3-D model of kidney, complete with stones and urine (his own), takes it on Big Thunder Mountain Railroad 60 times

3. “The stones passed 63.89 percent of the time while the kidneys were in the back of the car. When they were in the front, the passage rate was only 16.67 percent. That’s based on only 60 rides on a single coaster, and Wartinger guards his excitement in the journal article: ‘Preliminary study findings support the anecdotal evidence that a ride on a moderate-intensity roller coaster could benefit some patients with small kidney stones.’”

4. “Some rides are going to be more advantageous for some patients than other rides. So I wouldn’t say that the only ride that helps you pass stones is Big Thunder Mountain. That’s grossly inaccurate.”

5. “His advice for now: If you know you have a stone that’s smaller than five millimeters, riding a series of roller coasters could help you pass that stone before it gets to an obstructive size and either causes debilitating colic or requires a $10,000 procedure to try and break it up. And even once a stone is broken up using shock waves, tiny fragments and “dust” remain that need to be passed. The coaster could help with that, too.”

SCIENCE: IT WORKS

[kawuli]

Update: 

“In all, we used 174 kidney stones of varying shapes, sizes and weights to see if each model worked on the same ride and on two other roller coasters,” Wartinger said. “Big Thunder Mountain was the only one that worked. We tried Space Mountain and Aerosmith’s Rock ‘n’ Roller Coaster and both failed.”Wartinger went on to explain that these other rides are too fast and too violent with a G-force that pins the stone into the kidney and doesn’t allow it to pass.“The ideal coaster is rough and quick with some twists and turns, but no upside down or inverted movements,” he said.

MSU Today

[kawuli]

I just love this because it’s HILARIOUS and yet also a perfect archetypal example of The Scientific Method:

1. Hypothesis

2. Experiment

3. Results

4. Discussion 

5. Conclusions

6. GOTO 1 (the scientific method is iterative, don’t forget that part)

[kristoffbjorgman]

was this like… done in cooperation with disney management or did some  random scientist go through bag check with a 3d printed kidney and a bottle of piss and start looking for big thunder mountain fastpasses

[the-pie-initiative]

He asked first!

Of course, the researchers had to get permission from Disney World before bringing the model kidney onto the rides. “It was a little bit of luck,” Wartinger recalls. “We went to guest services, and we didn’t want them to wonder what was going on—two adult men riding the same ride again and again, carrying a backpack. We told them what our intent was, and it turned out that the manager that day was a guy who recently had a kidney stone. He called the ride manager and said, do whatever you can to help these guys, they’re trying to help people with kidney stones.”

[fellenleaf]

bi-layer mousse cake

[rintezukas]

scottish is as funny as bitish but much more respectable

[rintezukas]

when i hear bitish accent i am laughing at it and when i hear scottish accent i am laughing with it

[yugirimistwalker]

when i hear howler monkey i cower in fear

[rintezukas]

[yugirimistwalker]

EEK!!