User69

✨28 he/him ✨ im trying my best KOFI | COMMS OPEN | ART TAG 18+

[crowwkui]

ruthye's first trip to earth 🌎

[comment-tube]

[hannrum]

Obligatory swimsuit drawing

[edgeofgreatness]

let this be your sign to just go watch the supergirl movie, please dont let a bunch of misogynistic bad reviews get the best of you

[casterintherye]

love that the supergirl movie confirms that kryptonians aren’t weird ubermensch fascists and clark’s parents were just weird. Like they were just Scientologists or something

[waveoftheocean]

two fashion icons, actually

[grimeclown]

I got a job at a gas station across from a casino and a guy keeps coming in to buy whole cartons of cigarettes and talks in the third person calling himself "snake eyes pete" and every time I tell him his total hes like "tell ya what if old Pete rolls a snake eyes why dont you give it to him for free?" and he rolls the same set of loaded dice on the counter and it does not matter how many times he rolls snake eyes I will not give him the cartons for free he gets so mad

[grimeclown]

Snakeyes Pete is from Toronto he gave me a button once that said "Canadians have the best luck" and i said i thought that was the Irish and he said "I fucking hate the irish" and i said okay

[lowpawly]

this is my impression of what it would look like if the toddlers at my job could make traumacore edits about me

[lowpawly]

alright by popular demand here is more toddler traumacore

[systlin]

Getting down on my knees and thanking the humans who invented dishwashers and washing machines.

[ihonestlydontknowwhattocallthis]

InsNe that dishwashers are more efficient and easier than just washing them manually but they also use less water. It’s a win win situation

[systlin]

They ALSO sterilize dishes, due to operating at a far higher temperature than human hands could ever tolerate. It's a win every way.

[systlin]

Made this post about 15 minutes after the repair guy who fixed the pump on my dishwasher packed up his tools and left, as the dishwasher was whirring along doing my dishes from that morning.

He said the exact same thing, which I did not know before that, so spreading this knowledge.

[anti-parent]

teamwork makes the dream work. and dreamwork. makes shrek

[anti-parent]

fantastic. i love it. i posted this after my wife said it yesterday and as i was doing it i was like "this can't be an original thought. as soon as i hit post someone's going to say 'you stole this from a tweet from 2014' and i'll say 'no, i stole it from my beautiful wife.'"

[killhitleragain]

[depsidase]

[cottoncandylesbo]

(alien being shown yaoi) and you're saying, the men... have sex with each other? the men?

(alien being shown yuri) ohhh ya we do this shit too lmao

[temothylol]

[woman-respecter]

12 year old girls in the early 2000s watching the accidental kiss in episode 3 of naruto

[everythingfox]

Most unserious animal

[ceescedasticity]

That looks like an "I'm going to run through all my tricks until you reward me for something" to me.

[goodnightngoth]

me: sorry i’ve been busy

me for the last hours:

[nitw]

my entire body hurts i'm sobbing so bad over this holy shit

[melonfacade]

👽😡HEY ALIEN FUCK OFF😡👽 🖕🖕FUCK YOU ALIEN 🖕🖕 🤬🤬🍆SUCK MY DICK🍆🤬🤬 🖕🤬🖕FUCK OFF🖕🤬🖕FUCK OFF🖕🤬🖕 ❌👽🚨ANTI ALIEN ALARM 🚨👽❌ 👽🚫NO ALIEN🚫👽🚫NO MARCIANITO🚫👽 🤬🖕FUCK OFF🖕🤬🖕FUCK YOU🖕🤬🖕FUCK OFFFFFF🖕🤬 🚫🌎GET OUT OF HERE🌎🚫 ❌👽❌ANTI MARCIANITO❌👽❌ 😡😡NO😡NO😡NO😡😡 🖕🖕FUCK YOU🖕🖕 😡😡😡NO😡😡😡 🌎➡️➡️➡️LEAVE🌎➡️➡️➡️LEAVE ME ALONE🌎➡️➡️➡️ 😤😤😤BWAAAAAAAAAH😤😤😤 🌎➡️GET OUT OF HERE🌎➡️GET OUT OF HERE🌎➡️ 🛡️🛡️🛡️🛡️PROTECTIVE SHIELD 🛡️🛡️🛡️🛡️PROTECTIVE SHIELD 🛡️ 🛡️🛡️🛡️PROTECTIVE SHIELD 🛡️🛡️🛡️🛡️ 🚫🧛‍♂️🚫NO DRACULAS🚫🧛‍♂️🚫🧻🚫NO MUMMY🚫🧻🚫👽🚫NO ALIEN 🚫👽🚫🧌🚫NO DUENDE🚫🧌🚫 🚨🚨🚨ACTIVATE ALARM🚨🚨🚨CANNOT APPROACH🚨🚨🚨YOU WILL DIE🚨🚨🚨 😡😤😤😫😫AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHH😡😤😤😫😫😡AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHH😫😫😤😤😡