Apfelblaubeerkirschkernkuchen

One-Pot-Genderstew, She/He/They.  Tonight's theme on this blog is: Themes.

[tamber-tales]

My friend sent me something that I am unashamedly stealing to show you all

[frodo-of-the-nine-fingers]

immortality as theft (you have to steal life from something else) immortality as parasitism (there is something else inside You that is keeping you alive and you become less of yourself more and more the longer it stays in you) immortality as violence (everything is trying to kill you because everything is supposed to die and the universe will always try to find a way to right the wrong that is You) you understand

[ninewheels]

#at least once a month I think about that one post about laminating a paper towel#and how that makes it immortal but also forever prevents it from fulfilling its true purpose#yes you will live. but at the cost of everything that makes you You

(courtesy of noknowshame)

[juggalokomaeda]

Visit Original Link

i put “All I Want for Christmas is You” through a MIDI converter, and then back through an mp3 converter

the result is this garbage

[red3blog]

I’m driving myself up the wall because I swear I can hear the vocal line but I don’t know how that could be if it was truly converted to MIDI. Unless you can replicate speech sounds entirely with modulated MIDI notes, in which case I’m actually impressed with this tire fire of an MP3.

[staff]

[exeggcute]

the holiday season is almost upon us and I’d like to bring back this absolute fucking monstrosity of an audio file

[vincentphilip-deactivated201405]

[eventually--darling]

If you guys were on here at 11 years old what would you be posting about

[treasure-of-the-ancients]

Gold earring with glass head pendant, Phoenician/Carthaginian, 3rd-1st century BC

from The Metropolitan Museum of Art

[chimpachum]

This ancient Rockabilly pendant holds tremendous power

[undertalepilled]

I wish people treated queerness as breaking the rules of the dominant cis-hetero patriarchy so you can authentically be yourself. Instead of adhering to a new slightly less restrictive set of rules which you will deride other people for not following (basically whatever label discourse is now flaring up)

[daisywords]

One of my biggest nitpicks in fiction concerns the feeding of babies. Mothers dying during/shortly after childbirth or the baby being separated form the mother shortly after birth is pretty common in fiction. It is/was also common enough in real life, which is why I think a lot of writers/readers don't think too hard about this. however. Historically, the only reason the vast majority of babies survived being separated from their mother was because there was at least one other woman around to breastfeed them. Before modern formula, yes, people did use other substitutes, but they were rarely, if ever, nutritionally sufficient.

Newborns can't eat adult food. They can't really survive on animal milk. If your story takes place in a world before/without formula, a baby separated from its mother is going to either be nursed by someone else, or starve.

It doesn't have to be a huge plot point, but idk at least don't explicitly describe the situation as excluding the possibility of a wetnurse. "The father or the great grandmother or the neighbor man or the older sibling took and raised the baby completely alone in a cave for a year." Nope. That baby is dead I'm sorry. "The baby was kidnapped shortly after birth by a wizard and hidden away in a secret tower" um quick question was the wizard lactating? "The mother refused to see or touch her child after birth so the baby was left to the care of the ailing grandfather" the grandfather who made the necessary arrangements with women in the neighborhood, right? right? OR THAT GREAT OFFENDER "A newborn baby was left on the doorstep and they brought it in and took care of it no issues" What Are You Going to Feed That Baby. Hello?

Like. It's not impossible, but arrangements are going to have to be made. There are some logistics.

[anarchautistic]

All wizards lactate naturally

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

That's what Gandalf's Big Naturals are for

[wordswithkittywitch]

I just love the idea of a cis male wizard finding a baby and thinking, "Oh man. I have been waiting for an excuse to try this spell." and enchanting themselves to have functional and loaded breasts so they can feed their new charge.

[wordswithkittywitch]

I keep seeing this in my notifications and thinking, "What imbecile cursed me with the phrase 'functional and loaded breasts'?" and then discovering that I am in fact the imbecile.

[x-men-memes]

magneto can create force fields and levitate by supposedly strengthening and  riding magnetic waves, but he can also stop bullets (which are not made of a ferromagnetic material, but rather lead) meaning he may just have telekinesis and fooled himself into thinking he can only move metals through the power of assumption and placebo- in this essay i will-

[moreroads]

Okay but I raise you that his children and grandchildren canonically have reality warping powers, and it is just as possible (and more hilarious) if he too has reality warping powers but they are capped at being able to determine which metals are ferromagnetic. In this counterproposal I will-

[x-men-memes]

in a similar fashion, prof x has fooled himself into thinking he can’t read minds through metal regardless of being able to read wolverine’s mind when he has a metal skull, through this concurrence i will-

[ilikeit-art]

Source: instagram.com/tanya

About:

[knightofleo]

[mananabuffins]

I've never seen a more deserved cat slap

[luminaryofblood]

@theslowesthnery

[sh4d0w-gl]

[messygoku]

me and my bitches contacting David lynch in the afterlife to know what the fuck was the baby from eraserhead made out of

[bisexual-space-cowboy]

erasers

[messygoku]

[greelin]

as much as i understand being a hater you have to offset that shit with genuine, sincere enjoyment & wonder sometimes lest YOU become the one who is corny. and sad. imo.

[greelin]

where’s your fucking whimsy, jackass? your compassion? is it only irony and judgement 24/7 for you? booooo

[feluka]

cats being capable of understanding accidents and even giving you a little head bonk to let you know you're still cool makes it infinitely funnier that they don't understand when you're trying to help them

cats when you step on their tail: i'll admit that was rather ouchie, but given the lifetime of goodwill and trust between us, one must conclude this booboo is but a fluke.

cats when you try to get their claws unstuck from the couch covering: this nefarious bitch has never had a single honorable intention in their dishonest and shameful life, this must be one of their sinister plots or perhaps even an attempt on my life,

[anxiouslemondesigns]

[linklethehistorian]

Source

Transcript:

“BREAKING: A constitutional amendment has been filed allowing President Trump to seek a 3rd term in office.

"No person shall be elected to the office of the President more than three times, nor be elected to any additional term after being elected to two consecutive terms, and no person who has held the office of President, or acted as President, for more than two years of a term to which some other person was elected President shall be elected to the office of the President more than twice."

It was filed by Congressman Andy Ogles (R-TN).

Don’t let this slip by unnoticed. This is not just “one extra term”, it’s a warning shot. It’s a red flag. It’s an omen.

They are slowly turning up the heat in the pan. Do not be the frog who sits denying it’s getting hotter.

One extra term will become two, two will become three, and three will eventually give way to lifelong reign of each president.

Fight. Fight for God’s sake.

Contact your local representative of congress. Convince them we do not want this.

We are going to end up in a dictatorship.

@ikiyou

Please help spread this. I don’t usually get political and I don’t usually ask for assistance but this is important and you have more reach.

[eliyahu613]

this is literally, unironically, how Putin came to power in Russia. first he served his 2 terms. then he got them to amend the constitution so that non consecutive terms could be infinite. then, he got voters to amend the constitution again to say that Putin could run infinitely by packaging the amendment with pensions. now, we're here.

[srldesigns6277]

Also, read the writing; this is for the use of someone who did not complete two CONSECUTIVE TERMS. This could solely be used by two people: Grover Cleveland, who's been dead since the early 1900s, and Donald Trump. IT would not be possible for Clinton, Bush, or Obama to attempt to run for a Third Term. THIS CONSTITUTIONAL AMENDMENT WOULD ONLY WORK FOR TRUMP.

BE AWARE, BE FUCKING AWARE, PEOPLE!!!!