This is Not a Cigar. @elsodex - Tumblr Blog

Welcome! Everything is fine.

So I just got a handful of new followers which hasn't really happened in a while, and if you followed because of the Girl Talk comic or if you're one of the five people who actually played the Alva route in Focus on the Heart, I should maybe prepare you for some shit.

First off welcome, this is not primarily a Horizon blog, it's more a farrago of my interests and thoughts at any given moment.

I have a maniacal sense of humor, I'm old enough to remember dial-up, and my gender is a Problem™. I don't believe in those boilerplate descriptions that list every identifying characteristic short of a social security number at the top of blogs--but my ask box is always open and if you're clever and patient enough you can read between the lines.

Here's a list of my shit for easy reference:

Girl Talk

Focus on the Heart (Alva route)

Archive of Our Own

#I was looking at my queue #and I went #Welp #Guess folks are gonna decided pretty quick if they can hang or not but maybe I should set up a welcome mat regardless #Or maybe it's more like one of those redneck 'this house is protected by smith & wesson' signs #YOU DECIDE #I'll update and edit this post I'm sure but it's something for now I guess #my shit

proudfreakmetarusonikku

i NEED people to realise foreshadowing is. in fact. a literary device. and not a Bad Thing. the audience picking up on your hints is a Good Thing. because. it makes the story and it’s conclusion make sense. and some people will not see those but enjoy seeing them on a second read through. red herrings are one thing but if your novel consists of nothing but red herrings it’s not a coherent story it’s just a collection of paragraphs that don’t actually plausibly link to one another. you're not fighting with the audience you don’t look clever you look like you don’t know how basic fiction works. be vulnerable for once in your goddamn life and don't treat writing like a game to be won where the audience losing is a good thing.

beautifulterriblequeen

Bad storytellers are like bad contractors. They're supposed to do a job that's recognizable with tools and organization and results and then they... don't do that.

They have all these things at their disposal. They're getting paid to use them in a pleasing and recognizable way. But instead of making the job about the final product and how it will stand the test of time with reuse, they make it about themselves. What can they get, in the moment, from being paid, and how can they fool the consumer into momentarily accepting this sleight of hand so they can get away with it?

This is about Game of Thrones, but also any other knee-jerk instant gratification writers who've somehow lost sight of the point of storytelling and put their whole ego into tricking the people who just want to use their product. If you're so removed from the concept of story structure that you find more pleasure in abusing the tool set than having anything coherent to say, you are not experienced enough to be getting paid to do this job. Go experience some real life and get a grip on what you're doing, and come back with an actual purpose that serves anyone besides yourself.

magnhild

it's midnight on the 1st of june aest

dropoutvocalstims

posting this again cause now its actually true

tetrapod7

jewishvitya-movingblogs

One of the rare times where a comment section is delightful the moment I open it

ororium-z

Happy Pride!

rootbeergoddess

Every pride, you must reblog this. No exceptions

candycoloredwolf

Anyone gonna mention how this guy actually preformed live with Carly Rae Jepsen?

restfromthestreets

I’m gonna scream is2g

galaxa-13

I was thinking of reblogging this again just because the original video is still amazing, but then I see the second video and lost my mind. The upgraded fan, the body glitter, the sheer fact that he got to do this with the actual singer.

#IT'S PRIDE YA'LL

professional-outsider

Friday night Xena x Callisto from my patreon

wizardarchetypes

Normally you'd be right about gay fanart of media from the 90s but just this once it's actually like this.

thedukeofhastingssexyrobe

BRIDGERTON - Season 4 . Episode 3

ankle-beez

the chain of events in this minute and a half clip is so extremely delightful and funny

ankle-beez

kermit and scooter riffing on how their physicality doesn't let them open the envelope to announce the winner. the audience immediately cracking up when it cuts to statler and waldorf because they know what the bit is gonna be. jim henson slipping into the kermit voice accidentally before bouncing back at record speed and riffing on it. richard hunt genuinely laughing at jim's joke but doing so in-character. prime muppets was something else man