EscapismRUs

Ezzy, she/her, back on tumblr because twitter is too depressing, current hyper fixation is Heated Rivalry

[hollzy-baby]

I do like the idea of Scott Hunter spending the last years of his career trying to scout out another Respectable Gay Hockey Player because he needs to pass the torch and views the whole Centaurs situation as largely regrettable

[urie]

i looooooooove how annoying shane and ilya must be as the two best hockey players in the world just both of them being able to see the game at such an elite level and notice things no one else does and theyre basically speaking their own language to one another and saying things like "i dont even count a hat trick if its on an empty net if the goalie isnt there its NOT a real goal i think they should not count these" "absolutely if theres no challenge it isnt real" "exactlyyyyy" and they will say things like this in front of players who have Zero career hat tricks

[escapepodding]

hiiiii, i absolutely LOVED your prompt about shane getting amnesia, but instead of forgetting his loved ones, he forgets about hockey, i've had it in my mind for a while now and was wondering if i could write a fic for it? i can send you the link and tag you once i'm done :), it might just take me a bit to write it out cuz i've been super busy tho! hopefully, that's okay with you <3

Absolutely! I'm very flattered and it's sweet of you to ask, it's free to a good home! ❤️

[escapepodding]

In universe a bunch of non hockey fans saw this and asked who the hot model doing some sort of sports ad was, and it went viral and helped Yuna get Shane even more ad campaigns. But Shane was seething. Boiling with rage. Not at not being recognised, but as not being recognised as a professional sportsman.

He got asked if he was that famous model by strangers and bluntly said no. There were definitely pretty boy chirps which he ignored, and they were mostly jealousy (he's that good at hockey AND that gorgeous???) But he definitely checked someone so good it ended their season. Ilya probably made a joke at their next hookup and got body slammed into horny and hurt. The way Shane must view himself and his body is fascinating.

[escapepodding]

Post-TLG Shane chilling out about his diet and Ilya is delighted! He's sooooooo relaxed around the Centaurs and Ilya is so glad Shane is bonding with the team! Shane doesn't care about the captaincy and isn't competing with Ilya for it and that's great, right? They lose a game and he's shrugging, clapping people on the back in the locker room telling everyone you win some you lose some, and sure that's how it works but Ilya has literally never seen Shane take a loss well. And they're talking playoffs strategy and Shane Hollander is being quiet and just smiling and agreeing and his eyes seem kind of glazed...

And Ilya realises that actually maybe Shane isn't coping well with losing his captaincy and team that he built his career and identity around. Maybe sometimes chilling out is dissociation 🫠

[escapepodding]

re: shane having a university fund, closing an RESP comes with significant tax penalties hahah so that would probably be more of a factor than shane maybe changing his mind. their best option would probably be to transfer it to an RRSP (retirement savings). and they would also have to return the government grants that had been deposited in it. so yeah it wouldn’t be that imminently attractive to close the school fund

Thank you for this knowledge! I am genuinely delighted to picture Yuna and David having a very boring discussion (possibly with their financial advisor as they are the kind of steady middle-class people to know they are not just for the rich) about the best thing to do.

Do you get penalised if its not an RRSP for the person the RESP was intended for? If not I can see David arguing it should go to Shane's retirement as they intended it for his future and Yuna looking at boring, steady husband who loves her and their son so much, her heart full and tender, and saying "David...he's a multi-millionnaire"

[escapepodding]

Hello! I was wondering if I could use your post about how shane wasnt mentioned at all in the first book since he wasnt invented yet and he glitches out of reality as an inspo (with credit) for a fic id like to write?

Of course, please do, I'm very flattered it has inspired you! Please send me a link so I can read it when it's done 😊

[soldier-of-death]

im only attracted to worthy opponents

[lesbianlandry]

[escapepodding]

Speaking of David Hollander; I fully believe he and Yuna met at McGill with Yuna chirping his backhand and David being so enamored he fell over the side of the rink

That's such an adorable meet cute! Considering their jobs (David for the Treasury and I think Yuna was Bank of Canada before she was Shane's agent) I thought maybe they both studied economics, or met at a work conference later, and definitely bonded over hockey!

Yuna: Awww yesssss nabbing me that cute hockey player!

David: Awwww yessssssssss using hockey to romance that beautiful and smart woman!

Ilya (two decades later): awwwwww yessssssssssss these two people smashed their genetics together and created perfection!

They definitely joked that together they could create the best hockey player ever and were still kind of shocked when Shane happened and everyone agreed with them.

[escapepodding]

“Boring facts (in my head) about parent David Hollander”

Um, I just balled my eyes out?? This was so sweet it both heal something in me AND made me want to die???

Thank you so much!!! I'm delighted my boring facts (in my head post) resonated, we don't get a lot from David but gosh he loves his son so so much.

Special boring fact (in my mind) about parent David Hollander for you: Several hockey boarding schools offered some amazing scholarships to Shane, and Yuna thought they should at least discuss it. They spent so much of their lives driving Shane to practice and games, and it might help Shane.

Despite usually being level headed about everything it really upset David and for once he refused to even consider it, as they didn't have a kid for other people to raise him. And all that time spent driving Shane places was the most amount of time he got one on one with Shane from aged 12. He still offers to Shane places sometimes and is delighted when he says yes!

[escapepodding]

Boring facts (in my head) about parent David Hollander:

New people at work when introduced to him go "oh, like Shane Hollander" and he BEAMS at that and says "Yep!"

Has a picture of Shane on his desk and the same new people think its a joke until an old timer who probably met Shane at a bring your kid to work day clued them in

Would not let Yuna touch the college fund they set up for Shane until he was out of his rookie contract. What if Shane changed his mind about hockey? What if he got injured and needed a good education? Only conceeded when his son was a multi-millionaire

Only time he has ever gone to HR was when someone stole the baby Shane picture off his desk after he got famous. That's his baby!!! Give it back!!! There were so many memos and all staff emails that it did get returned one night, but a picture of it circulated online so now David only has PR photos at work

His lawyer is an old college friend who he catches up with at least once a year and who reviews the Hollander's will and life insurance policy each year with specific instructions to look after Shane. This annual tradition continues to this day. The lawyer buddy is going to be there for that grown celebrity professional sportsman no matter what

Was so excited when Shane started The Cottage project, and helped him with everything, including liaising with the builders etc. Was delighted to have the first a joint project with his son since school (he helped with art/science/show and tell)

Is really bad with technology but the nice young people at the office help (is not fully cognizant of the fact half the office is in love with him but does correctly suspect the other half want to marry his son)

Always knew he wanted to be a dad, and was devastated when it seemed like that wasn't going to happen, but didn't want to put that on Yuna who was already struggling with it

Sent congratulation cards and presents to all his buddies when they had kids anf was genuinely happy for then but it also killed him a bit. Unfortunately the conversation around men struggling because they wanted kids was not happening in the 80s/early 90s so he kept quiet (and passed that trait on to Shane)

Thought Shane was perfect from the moment he was born, and still thinks that. Can't concieve of why Shane thought he could let them down, he's literally always been Yuna and David's perfect baby

Gets out the good vodka again when he tells Ilya this one day and Ilya starts crying

[ticklefighthockey]

i believe that shane probably has a lot of internalized homophobia but as you know i also believe that if ilya had firmly taken the emotional reins after first time anal and been like 'we like each other now and it's not a big deal,' shane would've been like ok! yay :) instead ilya said AAAA AAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAA and threw the reins away like they were live snakes thus spooking the horses who started bucking and rearing and then ran straight off the edge of a cliff taking the whole carriage down with them

[escapepodding]

Just retired Hollanov going to react poorly in opposite directions. Ilya is going to make big claims about never exercising again then discover after a week his regular weights and cardio routine were a major pillar in standing up his mental health since he was a child.

Shane on the other hand is going to claim there's no reason for his exercise and diet regime to change, then realise without hockey there's no point. One morning he's just going to roll over and tell Ilya he wants to try cocaine.

[mythmagicetc]

ilya as captain of an all-star team still doing his “i love you i love you i love you” thing and everyone’s like “last week you told me i wasn’t ensouled because my mother didn’t orgasm when i was conceived but okay man”

[positivewlwvibes]

the years really do start coming and they dont stop coming and they dont stop coming a̶n̴d̴ ̸t̶h̴e̶y̴ ḋ̶̪̯̆o̴͔͠n̶͈̽̍t̷̟̭͝ ̷̻͙͊̎s̶͇͘ͅṱ̸̫̈́̒o̵̬̹͊p̷̬̰̂ ̵̗̬͛̀c̸̞̐̂ŏ̴͍̫͘m̶̢̐͊i̸̼̽ṉ̷̦̀g̵͉̒ ą̸̞͉̘͍̖̝̿̌n̸̛̼̤̝͛͊̓̊͜d̸̢͈̬͍̅̈́̽̓͊ͅ ̷̭̼̼̮̗͒ẗ̸̰̎̑̾͒͠ḧ̶͙͖͈̻̘͉͙́̓̉́̒̓͘ȩ̵̧̧̳̤͒̄̂̏̉̃̚ŷ̷̢͈̮̕͘ ̶̡̲̒̆̕͜d̷͚͔̟͉̳͉͛̈̇̂̈̈́͠o̵̧̻͕̝̖̣͋͂͗͑͐͝͝n̵̡̪͖̦͉͙̈́̉̅͠t̶̨̠̱̝̦̜͉̋̑̈́̚ ̶̬̘̏̀̃͂̃͜͝ͅş̶̺̰͕̺̙͋̎̎t̶̛͇͙̀̽̑̚͠ȏ̶̫͂p̴̠̫̳͂̀̉́̃ ̸̦̏̽c̷̛ͅo̴̹̩̺͌m̷̖̗̾̓͊̀î̷̥̔̔̂̚̕n̴̨̬̩͉̝̱̤̆͂͛̒̄g̴̡̩̝̠̯̻̞̈́͑͂

[trans-ralsei]

[trans-ralsei]

[caughtthedarkness93]

I love my job, but reblogging employment jelly for someone else I love.

[neeska3]

Ilya had opened 50 cards before this