Eternal Screaming

They/He I'm an adult. You need not know more.

[soulsintheashes]

can't stop thinking about how andy weir said that rocky is essentially baby talking to grace the entire time because the way he normally speaks is too advanced for their makeshift translator to understand (which makes sense, there is a limited amount of words inputted). so basically the entire time we've been treating rocky as if he's one of the dogs from "up", the ones with the collar that outputs their thoughts in human language. we've been treating rocky like a pet. when actually, rocky has been talking to ryland like a puppy the entire time.... even before y'alls fanon of ryland becoming rocky and adrian's pet human in his zoo enclosure.

[tall]

[furryprovocateur]

boobs is better than titties as a word because boobs is bouba while titties is kiki

[pinyatapix]

read this post and this is all i can ever imagine from it

[mintbees]

steam repeatedly notifying you that a friend is booting up a game thats clearly not cooperating feels like ur sitting inside and someone outside keeps trying to rev up a lawnmower

[mintbees]

[enbaluka-tokyo-drift]

[philosoverted-deactivated202006]

Do you ever lie awake wondering how the heck Gimli knows what a nervous system is

[systlin]

Clearly dwarves have medical knowledge far more advanced than that of the other races.

[gallusrostromegalus]

His Majesty Dr. Gimli, son of Gloin, Neurosurgeon, M.D.

[filthyprotozoan]

gimli trying to explain his studies to legolas, a flat-earther

[hubris-i]

#*scroll down* #*remember that middle earth is canonically flat for elves and round for everyone else* #*scroll back up & smash that reblog button"

[fridge246]

tired: legolas took gimli to valinor with him because they were bffs/in love/etc. 

wired: legolas took gimli to valinor to prove the world was flat after arguing with him about it for decades

[jemthecrystalgem]

Sorry it’s what to elves

[dvandom]

So, in Tolkein lore, the world was originally flat, with most of the land in the middle (hence Middle Earth).  But the Numenorians (men who were rewarded with their own Atlantis-equivalent island for service in the first big war against Melkor, but eventually Power Corrupts etc) tried to invade the uttermost west which was basically Elf Heaven.  To put an end to that sort of thing, the creator of the world Bent The World and made it a sphere…but left elves able to treat it like a flat disk.  So elves can sail west and reach Elf Heaven, but a man or dwarf or hobbit who sails west will eventually wrap around to the east coast of Middle Earth.

[moomoobooboo-deactivated2020102]

This is why Legolas can see for such great, almost impossible distances. The Earth does not curve for him.

[endreal]

Legolas said fuck the horizon

[yujateaandpi]

Was driving with my grandmother and in broken English she says “no eyes… no nose… no face. Don’t trust.” To which I looked around wildly in search of this omen of ill portend.

Cybertruck. It was a cybertruck.

[disneyprincessdxminatrix]

being late getting into a piece of media or joining a ‘dead’ fandom is not that bad actually cause even if it seems like the party is over there will always be people still celebrating and the decoration is still up and there’s a piece of cake reserved especially for you in the fridge you just have to come and enjoy it.

[thegunlady]

love the trope where an authoritative side character pointedly pretends not to help the hero they’re not supposed to be helping by saying shit like “well I can’t just let you wander around up to the THIRD FLOOR where you could just FIND THE THING YOU NEED in the FIRST ROOM ON THE LEFT. And under no circumstances should you USE THE KEY FROM UNDER THE MAT. I wish I could help you, but I CAN’T. Now excuse me, I need to take this phone call for the next 37 minutes EXACTLY.”

[seraph5]

My doctor did that for me once. I had to get an expensive brain scan and she was like ‘do you smoke?’ and I was like ‘no’ and she was like “well that’s a pity because the government will pay for this expensive brain scan if you had been a smoker so - do you smoke?” 🤣🤣🤣 I was like ‘yes’ and she’s like ‘oh wow then this scan will be free’

[x-authorship-x]

[twig-the-escaped-cephalopod]

i am Thinkimg . about the Character. and listening to a Song. i a m sure this will not have repercussions

[catadromously]

the dubious philosophy of salmon

[catadromously]

the number of people who have looked at this is officially too large a number

[prokopetz]

The real reason your sapient dragon character needs a "rider":

Dragons on the wing are vulnerable to being mobbed by smaller, more agile flyers, particularly in your large rear blind spot, like a bird of prey being mobbed by crows. Having a human armed with a long spear perched on your back helps to dissuade anyone from getting any funny ideas.

Breath weapons are impressive enough on the ground, but in flight they're really only good for strafing stationary targets; trying to use your breath weapon in an aerial dogfight is a good way to get fire up your nose. A real fight calls for sterner measures – and, concomitantly, a crew to aim and reload the cannons.

In today's competitive world, it's not enough to devour a flock of sheep and call it a day if you want to keep your edge. You're accompanied at all times by a qualified personal alchemist tasked with carefully regulating your internal furnace to ensure peak performance, and sometimes you even listen to them.

No dragon of any quality would be caught dead without their valet. It's not as though you can announce your numerous long-winded titles yourself when introductions are called for, can you? You suppose next you'll be expected to pick up the spoils of your conquests yourself, like a common brigand. Perish the thought!

[mikkeneko]

[nocturnal-stims]

Flexible feather armor

🪽 Miscreations_us on IG

[kuutamosonaatti]

Shira Barzilay, A Crazy Night in the Museum, 2022

[utilitymonstergirl]

outta my way gayboy I’m boutta get it

[utilitymonstergirl]

demntist

[moghedien]

One like nitpick thing that drives me crazy is when people call Blue Whales the largest whales or the largest living mammals or some shit like that

Because yes that is true. But when you frame it like that you are completely disregarding the absolutely batshit reality that Blue Whales are the largest animals that have ever existed on earth through the entire history of the planet and they are alive right now today

[justsomeguycore]

lesbian scifi is so easy. here’s a woman in cargo pants and a tank top on a spaceship. are you with me

[justsomeguycore]

maybe it’s not even cargo pants. maybe it’s coveralls rolled to + tied around the waist. maybe she even has fuckoff boots

[natalieironside]

There's always a moment of intense cultural whiplash whenever I realize I'm talking to someone who thinks "legal" and "illegal" are meaningful categories and ascribes innate goodness to following the law. It's like meeting a space alien.