That’s a face of a defeated man.
Half defeated, half “this sort of ridiculousness is what made me fall in love with her and I wouldn’t have it any other way”
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@everythingnnothingg
That’s a face of a defeated man.
Half defeated, half “this sort of ridiculousness is what made me fall in love with her and I wouldn’t have it any other way”
“assigning genders to babies is wrong”
I think they’re referring to stuff like this
“I HATE MY THIGHS”??? REALLY????
Ma, pick me up, the heteros are being really fucking weird and gross again.
hey what the fuck is wrong with straight people
Everything. The answer is fucking everything
dogs with jobs
WHAT. GOOD. DOGS.
legends
every person can feel freddie’s presence in their souls when they sing MAMAAAAAA UUHHHH, I DONT WANNA DIE, I SOMETIMES I WISH I’VE NEVER BEEN BORN AT ALL with all the air in their lungs i’m not joking
it’s fucking crazy to think about the amount of people who have sung bohemian rhapsody? like it’s such a unifying song, by nature of the fact that so many people know it. it holds so many good memories for me and other people. it’s a song you scream in the car with your friends while you drive around your boring hometown, it’s a song you drunkenly sing with your arm around your best friend, or a song you sing along to with strangers when it’s on in public. it’s bittersweet to think about freddie’s legacy carrying on like that through his masterpiece. freddie carries on because he’s a part of so many people’s good memories and bohemian rhapsody is a huge part of that.
Reblog if you have sung bohemian rhapsody with your friends
every time i see this post i’m reminded of the video of 65,000 people singing bohemian rhapsody in near-perfect harmony
like, what other song can make that claim?
Some of the highlights of that video include:
The crowd cheering after the first stanza when they realize what they’re all doing
So many people audibly ‘doing the guitar parts’… like ya do
The sheer number of voices joining the rediculous falsetto (thanks, Roger)
How they all start jumping at the ramp-up “so you think you can stomp me”
Hands up, hundreds, thousands deep for the final “ooooo”s and the last line to close the song
I gotta try this one day!
harry immediately after discovering tom riddle’s diary absorbs ink: hello magical book my name is Harry Potter and my age and address and credit card information and password is
gay pride cat
When a drunk girl outside a club bathroom speaks… you listen. If she tells you that you’ll find love despite being hurt in the past? She’s right. If she tells you to stop being so self-aware? She’s right. They are the modern day Oracles at Delphi and must be taken at their every word
catholics be like “don’t be horny kids” and then bombard you with images of half naked men tied up to things
ur right and u should say it
favorite presidential kid? probably alice roosevelt.
-her mother died two days after she was born and on the same day her maternal grandmother also died. teddy was so sad that he left his newborn daughter with his sister anna for two years and could never bring himself to say his wife’s name so alice who was named after her mother had to be called “lee”, her middle name.
-when teddy remarried, alice’s stepmom edith made it clear that she thought alice’s mom had been beautiful but dumb. when alice’s parents couldn’t handle her anymore, they sent her to her aunt anna’s. according to alice, “If auntie Bye had been a man, she would have been president”. alice claimed to feel one-sixth as loved as her five half-siblings.
-then alice got polio which at the time could kill, not to mention cripple. her stepmom put her through an uncompromising regimen of nightly forced wearing of torturous leg braces and shoes, which left alice with no trace of the disability and able to run up stairs and touch her nose with her toe well into her 80s.
-alice’s dad and stepmom tried to send her to a conservative girls’ school but alice wrote home, “If you send me I will humiliate you. I will do something that will shame you. I tell you I will”.
-when teddy became president in 1901, alice became an instant celebrity and fashion icon at age 17. she did scandalous things like smoking cigarettes in public, riding in cars with men, staying out late partying, keeping a pet snake (called emily spinach) in the white house, and placing bets with a bookie.
-she even had a color - alice blue - and a song - alice blue gown - named after her. the press called her princess alice.
-during an imperial cruise to japan, alice jumped into a pool fully dressed and coaxed a congressman in to join her.
-one time a white house visitor commented on alice’s frequent interruptions in the oval office, usually with political advice. after the third interruption, teddy explained, “I can either run the country or I can attend to Alice, but I cannot possibly do both”.
-in february 1906, alice married congressman nicholas longworth and was the social event of the season. it was attended by more than a thousand guests and thousands gathered outside hoping for a glance of princess alice. she wore a blue wedding dress and cut the wedding cake with a sword.
-alice publicly supported her dad’s 1912 presidential candidate while her husband supported president taft. alice appeared on stage in her husband’s own district with her dad’s vp candidate. longworth lost by 105 votes and alice joked that she was worth at least 100 votes (meaning she was the reason he lost).
-alice’s campaign against her husband caused a friction in their marriage and longworth was known to be carrying on many affairs. it was also generally accepted knowledge in dc that alice had a long, ongoing affair with senator william borah, who by alice’s own admission was the father of her daughter, paulina. alice had a wicked sense of humor and had initially wanted to name her daughter deborah (as in de Borah).
-after the death of her daughter paulina in 1957, alice fought for and won custody of her granddaughter joanna.
-in the 1950s, alice’s health began to fail her and she broke a hip. she also discovered she was suffering from breast cancer and had to have two mastectomies. in 1960, alice was diagnosed with emphysema.
-alice was also a champion of rights for african-americans. one day, in 1965, alice’s african-american chauffeur and good friend, turner, was driving her to an appointment. turner pulled out in front of a taxi and the driver yelled at him, “What do you think you’re doing, you black bastard?” turner stayed calm but alice told the taxi driver, “He’s taking me to my destination, you white son of a bitch!”
-after many years of ill health, alice died of emphysema and pneumonia at age 96, outliving all five of her younger half-siblings.
-her most famous quote was, “If you haven’t got anything good to say about anybody, come sit next to me”.
-when senator joseph mccarthy joked at a party, “Here’s my blind date. I am going to call you Alice”, she replied, “Senator McCarthy, you are not going to call me Alice. The trashman and the policeman on my block call me Alice, but you may not”.
-she told president lyndon b. johnson that she wore wide-brimmed hats so he couldn’t kiss her.
-when a kkk member dressed in full costume asked her to trust his word, she said, “I never trust a man under sheets”.
so in summary, alice roosevelt longworth was badass.
this is her:
here’s little alice
more of teen/young adult alice
alice with her daughter paulina
alice as a grand old lady
answered a scam call today and had the most bizarre conversation
scam caller: hello, how are you today?
me: great!
scam caller: good. I’m calling because your IP address has been compromised. I’ll just need you to get in front of your computer so we can get your account fixed up.
me: okay! there is one thing I’m wondering, though
scam caller: what?
me: you really couldn’t think of a better lie?
scam caller:
me: like, my “IP address has been compromised.” How, exactly, does an IP address become “compromised”?
scam caller:
me: I was just wondering, is all
scam caller: why did you answer?
me:
me: what?
scam caller: if you knew this wasn’t a legitimate call, then why did you answer?
me: oh, I just though I would have some fun at your expense.
scam caller: what expense? talking is no expense to me.
me: well, you’re currently not accomplishing your goal
scam caller: my goal?
me: your goal of scamming my elderly grandmother. You’re not accomplishing that. I’d call that an expense.
scam caller: well, can I scam you?
me:
me: did you- did you ask if you can scam me?
scam caller: yes. can I scam you?
me, baffled: sure, you can try
scam caller: you need to get in front of your computer
me: yeah, that’s still a problem. I’m eating tater tots right now and I really don’t feel like getting up.
scam caller: okay. I will call you tomorrow morning, then.
me: I might not answer. My grandma definitely won’t.
scam caller: You answered today.
me: …touché?
scam caller: I will call you tomorrow. Have a good day.
Enemies to lovers, slow burn, 500K
What to do when you’re having a panic attack?
Since i had a panic attack today and got through it i thought That it would be helpful to some to do a useful guide.
1. Realize that you are having a panic attack, many times people think that their having a heart attack and They start panicking even more.
2. Take deep breaths. My personal favourite is breathing in for 7 sec., holding it for 4 sec, and breathing out for 8. Works Every time !
3. Find an object and focus on it. Inspect it’s Every corner, color ect. Think of it as If you were to draw it. You need Every shadow and Every detail to do so.it helps so much and
4. DO NOT TALK ! at least in my experience That makes you panic even more.
So what are the panic attack symptoms?
According to the ADAA it’s :
Palpitations, pounding heart, or accelerated heart rate
Sweating
Trembling or shaking
Sensations of shortness of breath or smothering
Feelings of choking
Chest pain or discomfort
Nausea or abdominal distress
Feeling dizzy, unsteady, light-headed, or faint
Chills or heat sensations
Paresthesia (numbness or tingling sensations)
Derealization (feelings of unreality) or depersonalization (being detached from your own body)
I was going to make a joke about how people tell their hairdressers so many personal details that I wouldnt be surprised if someone confessed to murder while I was styling their hair but then I remembered that was an actual thing that happened when I was in cosmetology school
SO when I was in cosmetology school i was in the breakroom and I was telling everyone back there about how my client had just told me about how her dead husband’s head was found at the airport along with 63 other human heads (that’s a story for another day) and everyone started swapping stories about weird things that their client had told them
and then this one girl pipes up and is like “Yeah my client told me about how she killed her husband once.” and we were like EXCUSE ME??? WHAT? and she was like “yeah apparently her husband was coming at her with a knife and she managed to get it away from him and stabbed him like three times”
according to the teachers she had A. told that story to at least three other students in the time she had been coming there and B. It was ruled as self defense so it’s not like she was a criminal who was on the run
Okay but tell us the human heads story
op can we PLEASE have the human heads story
OKAY so this one I actually have a lot more context for because it was a firsthand experience buckle the fuck in
So I get this client, she’s an older lady so it was a color retouch and a trim and I was like okay I do this all the time this is gonna be just a super routine and mundane day. So I’m chatting with her just like usual small talk stuff like asking how her day is going and stuff and at some point she says: “I’m actually going to be in the newspaper tomorrow so I needed to get this done so I look good when they take my picture.”
So I’m like “Oh that’s nice! I hope you have fun!” and she goes “It’s not going to be fun, it’s because of a court case. I’m seeking legal action against a funeral home because they stole my husband’s body.” She’s saying this is the most casual tone ever and let me tell you, when someone you don’t know drops information like that on you, it’s the weirdest situation ever
I have NO idea how I’m supposed to react properly to that so I’m just saying “Oh no that’s so terrible!” and she keeps on going
“Yeah his head was found at an airport with 63 other human heads. they removed some of his body parts before they cremated him and sold them illegally. They were using his head at a dental convention in some other country.”
That was the strangest thing a client had ever decided to share with me and i’ve been continuously googling that shit trying desperately to find what she was interviewed for but there’s nothing and I can’t figure out if it’s weirder that she may have lied to me about this crazy story or if it actually happened and she decided to tell a student hairdresser she never met the entire story without being prompted
maybe this one???
Concept: medusa is a lesbian and that’s why she turns men to stone and she ends up falling in love with a blind lesbian who stumbles into her lair
oops my hand slipped
“SEND HELP SHE’S ADORABLE”
THIS IS TOO CUTE I’M DYING
WE NEED MORE LESBIAN MYTHS :D
@ryshai I’m 100% sure we’ve already mentioned each other in this post but I needed to do it again xd
a year later -
whoops my hand slipped
AAAHHH UPDATE ART YAAAASSS
In the world of Harry Potter there have to be magical prostitutes that specialize in using polyjuice potion so the client can have sex with anyone they can get a hair from.