What it’s Like to be Genderflux
The pinks represent the spectrum of femininity, the grey represents a lack of gender, the blues represent the spectrum of masculinity, and the yellow represents non-binary genders.
What does Genderflux mean?
Genderflux means that the intensity of your gender changes. Genderflux is a very broad label and includes all kinds of different people. Many of us will use a more specific label, like girlflux, boyflux, agenderflux etc. Some people describe it as feeling like 100% a girl sometimes, a demigirl other times and agender at other times. Other people experience it as fluctuating between two distinct genders, such as boy and maverique, so sometimes they’re 100% boy, sometimes 50% maverique and 50% boy, sometimes 100% maverique (for instance).
Genderflux means having a gender that varies in intensity, from genderless to the full intensity of a particular gender - so from genderless to male, genderless to female, or genderless to another nonbinary gender.
AFAB girlflux people and AMAB boyflux people are not cis! Being agender sometimes doesn’t sound like a very cis thing to be. Genderflux teenagers are also rad and not just experiencing fluctuating hormones!
People will claim that genderflux is a ‘special snowflake’ gender; I guess they don’t understand or don’t believe that it’s possible to be genderless, or for a person’s gender to change over time. But really both these things can and do happen. Also I’ve been told I should just call myself a tomboy. Well I’m AFAB and female aligned but I’m not into tomboy stuff, so, no! I guess enbyphobes don’t realise that gender is about who you feel you are, not what your interests are.
What is it like to be Genderflux?
At first, it was a little bit confusing and I first called myself genderfluid. I experience genderflux a little bit differently, where I mostly feel neutral but sometimes shift to having a little bit of intensity in another gender. I call this neutroisflux.
We genderflux people have some similarities with genderfluid people, where sometimes we’re comfortable presenting as one gender but other times want to be read as a different gender (or lack thereof). But this doesn’t make us confused or attention-seeking or whatever, but people experiencing gender a different way.
I often find my gender hard to explain to people, so I mostly tell people that I’m genderqueer/nonbinary and leave it at that, and other genderflux people will just say they’re one gender for simplicity. But other people do tell people they’re genderflux, and kudos to them!
So I don’t have a whole ton to say about being genderflux, but it’s been a confusing two years. I’m afab, so at the times where I feel female, I feel like I’m lying to myself; have I been making it up the entire time? No, because I sometimes get feelings where my gender fluctuates. When I was figuring out my identity, nothing really clicked and I had a hard time trying to figure it out. so when I found out what genderflux was, it made sense! It’s a relatively new coined term, So there’s hardly any rep/resources about it. And because of that, my parents didn’t quite believe me (they’re relatively supportive), and some people thought it was the same thing as being genderfluid. I don’t really have any advice as to any of this, but I wish the best of luck to people desperately trying to find a gender that really speaks to them!
I’m AFAB and my tastes are quite feminine, but I’m usually more towards the genderless end of the scale. I feel better in unisex clothes: bootcut or skinny fit jeans, hipsters only, and close-fitting but not revealing t-shirts. And tie-dye. Tie-dye knows no gender ;) I learned not to buy anything frilly or dainty, no matter how much I like it at the time, because I know I’ll seldom feel like wearing it. If I have to wear makeup for social functions I go for a dramatic look or vibrant colour. Occasionally I get dysphoric about my body but I know it’ll pass so I try to ignore it. The thought of being pregnant or breastfeeding usually makes me feel ill. But social dysphoria bothers me more, usually in the shop where I work. Customers often comment that various items of ladies wear would look good on me, and I don’t know how they miss the fact that I’m not that feminine. Awareness of NB genders seems so low, so coming out would take far more explaining than I have time for at work. I spent many years wondering if my dysphoria was due to some sort of mental illness until I heard of NB genders. It might have been less stressful and easier to figure out what was going on if I never felt like my assigned gender, and if there were no fluctuations. So for anyone who’s in a similar situation, I just want to say, don’t worry, there’s nothing wrong with you and you’re not alone!
Tips for being Genderflux
Even if a different word technically fits you better, you’re allowed to use genderflux if it helps you feel more comfy. We’re such a diverse group of gender experiences that we’ll welcome you, no questions asked.
Sometimes, dysphoria is confusing. It’ll be worse some days than others, not just based on days being different but because your gender is different. It’s ok, take it easy and do what you need to. I’ve found it helpful to carry my binder around for if I need it later, so I suggest doing something like that if you’re able.
Genderflux people are rad! You’re doing just fine as a genderflux person and there are people that support you, even if you don’t know them yet.
Contributions By:
@genderfluxsupport
@theravenfliesagain
@eldritch-squirrel
