ELIO CHANGING THEIR NAME ON SPOTIFY AGHHH so proud of him <3
noise dept.
we're not kids anymore.
Not today Justin
RMH
Misplaced Lens Cap
will byers stan first human second
YOU ARE THE REASON
wallacepolsom
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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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@explosivekobold
ELIO CHANGING THEIR NAME ON SPOTIFY AGHHH so proud of him <3
Silly Little Lineage Game: Year 1
The 12 families
Gravite & Onin Human (20)
Twinse & Thrine Elf (20)
Fon & Fin Dwarf (20)
Sin & Sven Orc (20)
Einot & Nina Goblin (20)
Zot & Hyf Troll (20)
Equat & Quine Naga (20)
Wallace & Evan Angel (20)
Rita & Tina Saurian (20)
Yugoth & Umbra Mermaid (20)
Inebriell & Ophelia Wose (20)
Princess & Oceracket Vampire (20)
I named them after the keys on the keyboard, and I’ll continue doing so! Next is ]. First off, let’s roll the birth dice! I don’t have a coin on hand so I’ll just roll d20s. Odds are tails and evens are heads. Heads means baby and tails means no baby.
Gravite & Onin Human (20) Heads! Closek Human is born! (0)
Twinse & Thrine Elf (20) Heads! Blash Elf is born! (0)
Fon & Fin Dwarf (20) Heads! Abor Dwarf is born! (0)
Sin & Sven Orc (20) Tails! No babies!
Einot & Nina Goblin (20) Tails! No babies!
Zot & Hyf Troll (20) Heads! Snof Troll is born! (0)
Equat & Quince Naga (20) Heads! Diba Naga is born! (0)
Wallace & Evan Angel (20) Heads! Frea Angel is born! (0)
Rita & Tina Saurian (20) Heads! Gink Saurian is born! (0)
Yugoth & Umbra Mermaid (20) Tails! No babies!
Inebriell & Ophelia Wose (20) Tails! No babies!
Princess & Oceracket Vampire (20) Tails! No babies!
So we got 7 new little ones! A human, an elf, a dwarf, a troll, a naga, an angel, and a saurian. How fun! Now we roll the death dice for each individual, including the babies, to see if they die! The 20 year olds all roll 2d10 and die if they get double ones and the babies roll 2d20 and die with the same result. Pretty fucked up if babies die but that’s why is a 1 in 400 chance!
Gravite Human (20) 8-8 Gavite lives to 21!
Onin Human (20) 8-1 Onin lives to 21!
Twinse Elf (20) 9-5 Twinse lives to 21!
Thrine Elf (20) 6-5 Thrine lives to 21!
Fon Dwarf (20) 2-10 Fon lives to 21!
Fin Dwarf (20) 2-1 Fin lives to 21!
Sin Orc (20) 3-9 Sin lives to 21!
Sven Orc (20) 2-4 Sven lives to 21!
Einot Goblin (20) 6-8 Einot lives to 21!
Nina Goblin (20) 6-5 Nina lives to 21!
Zot Troll (20) 6-6 Zot lives to 21!
Hyf Troll (20) 4-7 Hyf lives to 21!
Equat Naga (20) 10-3 Equat lives to 21!
Quince Naga (20) 7-4 Quince lives to 21!
Wallace Angel (20) 7-8 Wallace lives to 21!
Evan Angel (20) 8-10 Evan lives to 21!
Rita Saurian (20) 10-1 Rita lives to 21!
Tina Saurian (20) 9-2 Tina lives to 21!
Yugoth Mermaid (20) 5-10 Yugoth lives to 21!
Umbra Mermaid (20) 10-9 Umbra lives to 21!
Inebriell Wose (20) 5-9 Inebriell lives to 21!
Ophelia Wose (20) 10-4 Ophelia lives to 21!
Princess Vampire (20) 1-1… Princess Vampire dies, along with the Vampire name.
Oceracket Vampire (20) 3-3 Oceracket lives to 21!
Closek Human (0) 16-20 Clocek lives to 1!
Blash Elf (0) 19-14 Blash lives to 1!
Abor Dwarf (0) 20-15 Abor lives to 1!
Snof Troll (0) 11-5 Snof lives to 1!
Diba Naga (0) 19-14 Diba lives to 1!
Frea Angel (0) 11-7 Frea lives to 1!
Gink Saurian (0) 18-14 Gink lives to 1!
Wow, that’s heavy. Princess Vampire died with no offspring. Meaning that the Vampire kingdom will rot away while the others, hopefully, prosper. Also Oceracket is without a partner, without a child, without a family. They will live out the rest of their lives being the sole ruler of their kingdom. Will they choose love? Or will they choose hate? Probably something in between, but that is up to them. And with that, we end year one. With 30 individuals in our Silly Little Lineage Game.
Silly Little Lineage Game
While lineage and monarchies are fucked up things in real life, in a fantasy setting I’ve been kinda obsessed with them lately. So, I’m going to make a very bare bones world with some kingdoms and rolling dice (no it’s not dnd) for the sole purpose of tracking the lineage and family trees of these families in a project that is not dissimilar to counting rice.
First, we’re going to start with 12 families. These families will be made up of two people each, they will have babies, die, and pass on their kingdoms to their babies. The babies will grow up, marry into the other families, and continue the cycle.
The 12 families are going to be named after fantasy races from The Battle for Wesnoth. The intention was names but if you want to go full monster fucker, I support you picturing them as these creatures as well.
Human
Elf
Dwarf
Orc
Goblin
Troll
Naga
Drake
Saurian
Mermaid
Wose
Ogre
I’m going to go one year at a time and the 24 starting Adams and Eves are going to be 20 years old each. Every year I’m going to roll birth dice for every couple and death dice for every individual. With the birth dice they have to roll the highest possible number to have a baby and the specific dice they use is based on how many kids they have.
0-1 = one coin (heads is highest)
2-3 = 2 coins
4-5 = 1d4
6-7 = 1d6
8-9 = 1d8
10-11 = 1d10
12-13 = 1d12
14-15 = 2d4
16-17 = 1d20
18-19 = 2d6
20-21 = 2d8
22-23 = 2d10
24-25 = 2d12
26+ = 2d20
That’s a lot of possible babies, which is where we bring in the death dice! If an individual rolls the lowest possible number on their death dice (tails or ones) then they die and pass on their inheritance or die without rank and station like a loser. The death dice are decided by age and work inversely to birth dice.
0-9 = 2d20 (1 in 400)
10-19 = 2d12 (1 in 144)
20-29 = 2d10 (1 in 100)
30-39 = 2d8 (1 in 64)
40-49 = 2d6 (1 in 36)
50-59 = 1d20 (1 in 20)
60-69 = 2d4 (1 in 16)
70-79 = 1d12 (1 in 12)
80-89 = 1d10 (1 in 10)
90-99 = 1d8 (1 in 8)
100-109 = 1d6 (1 in 6)
110-119 = 1d4 (1 in 4)
120-129 = 2 coins (1 in 4)
130+ = 1 coin (1 in 2)
I roll these dice once an in game year so it is VERY unlikely for an individual to live to 90. Okay, so they had babies and died but how do the babies have babies? Well they aren’t born coupled up so that’s where we bring in the couple dice! Between the birth and death dice I roll a d20 for every uncoupled individual of each generation. Anyone who gets the same number are matched up, if there are ties I’ll do something to figure that out but sadly poly relationship are too complicated for my simple little world (as is gender). BUT GENETICS ISN’T!
I want to prevent siblings marrying each other as much as possible so I’m inventing a strange form of genetics for this game. Every individual will have 5 genetic components that will be represented by letters. Every family will have 5 of the first letter of their race/family name- BUT WAIT! I’ve got some repeats here in the Dwarf and Drake family as well as the Orc and Ogre family so that needs to be addressed first.
Wesnoth really doesn’t have many other races that aren’t just animals to choose from so I’m going to have to find a different source. So I visited the monster list of Heroes of Might and Magic 3 and settled on adding Angel and Vampire… cause I like em.
Human
Elf
Dwarf
Orc
Goblin
Troll
Naga
Angel
Saurian
Mermaid
Wose
Vampire
Okay, so once two individuals have a baby I’m going to assign heads and tails to each of them and flip a coin for the 5 genetic components. This will decide the genetics of their baby. For instance, if a human (5 H’s) and an elf (5 E’s) have a baby that baby might have HEHEE as their genetic makeup. I’m splitting the genetics 60/40 between the parents so once a baby has 3 of one parents’ letters the rest of the letters are from the other parent for sure. Once the coupling dice are rolled, if an individual is paired up with another that as EVEN ONE of the same letter as them, they are too closely related and the dice roll is cancelled.
But let’s get back to what this is all about: TRACKING LINEAGE! Here’s how the inheritance will go:
Spouse
Children
Grandchildren etc.
Siblings
Siblings’ children etc.
Parents
Parents’ Siblings
First Cousins
Grandparents
Then it just continues like that. Spouses always rule together but having spouse at the top just means that if you die and leave a spouse behind rulership does not move until the spouse dies. We’re not going to have remarrying because I don’t want to. If an individual has more than one child, sibling, etc. then it goes to the oldest of said category.
That seems to be pretty much it. Let’s just see how this goes!
an unfortunate addition to the susie fan club
susie is ready to be hated again
kris got to them first
Hilda Green
Slowly, she lifted her body off the ground. Panting, Hilda stomped her feet into the ground and two strong roots grabbed hold of her legs holding her down. That last attack almost sent her off the side of the cliff, she’d have to be more careful against someone this strong.
Marceline cackled as she approached; leaving the meadow behind her nothing but scorched earth.
“Why are you doing this?” Hilda yelled at her assailant, “why can’t you just leave us alone?!”
The Marble Queen stopped and lowered her head. Hilda braced herself for another attack... but she just stood there. Was she actually considering her question? Hilda never expected Marceline to give an actual answer when she asked. Although with that in mind she’s not quite sure why she asked in the first place.
“Us,” Marceline asked in a deadpan tone, “why did you just say, “us”?” Before Hilda could respond Marceline spoke again, “There is no, “us,” you’re all alone on this island. There’s nothing but you and these stupid-”
Marceline stopped herself. This whole fight she had been so busy melting the trees and vines Hilda was using to defend herself, that she never considered the thought that Hilda saw them as anything more than just that: plants.
“Oh give me a BREAK!” Marceline yelled, lava pouring from her fingertips, “You mean to call me you’ve survived these years of isolation because you had the company of PLANTS?!”
Hilda blushed, she didn’t know why, but the way Marceline said that made her feel... embarrassed.
“You know, when I saw you I thought you were stable, but it turns out you’re just as crazy as I am! Talking to plants,” she paused, then chuckled to herself, “well... at least your companions are alive. All I had was furniture. That’s all there was, in that empty castle. Chairs, tables, lamps, clocks... and me. No other person to keep my company... not even some dumb plants.”
The lava had stopped pouring from Marceline’s hands. She crossed her arms across her chest. This whole time she had been in such an open, aggressive stance, it was weird to Hilda to see her so closed off.
“You know,” Hilda said, hesitantly, “I might have had plants all this time, but I had wondered what it would be like... to meet someone like me.”
Hilda told the vines to let go of her, they tightened a bit but then released her. She made her way towards Marceline. It wasn’t until Hilda was in arms reach that she saw the smile on Marceline’s face. She tried to regain her distance but it was already too late, she was caught in Marceline’s trap.
Reblog this with an image and I’ll make a joke about it
When I just got home and let out every fart I’ve been holding in
Reblog this with an image and I’ll make a joke about it
You fool, the others just haven’t put on their fursuits yet
Reblog this with an image and I’ll make a joke about it
Someone respond to this negativily so I can threaten you creativly.
Ummmmm.... ur a butt
I’ll set you on fire with a magnifying glass
Someone respond to this negativily so I can threaten you creativly.
Ummmmm.... ur a butt
Someone respond to this negativily so I can threaten you creativly.
Jim and his dog
Jim asked his dog to stop licking the furniture because it is weird. “Bork bork bork,” says his dog named Jerry. “Wow Jerry I don’t understand what you’re saying because you speak French.”
Actually it’s Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein’s Monster.
i don’t trust men who are unable to maintain platonic relationships with women.
Good. Don’t.
This, and also: don’t trust women that do not allow their boyfriends to have platonic relationships with other women.
I fixed it for you
I will grant all your wishes, but at what cost?
I just want to make one of those posts that randomly gets 5,000 notes and becomes one of those annoying posts you see in screen shots on every social media platform while I slowly fade into obscurity and my post’s fame outlives my own.
Alright, that was a bad idea. I’ll be back later with something better.