Goat you gotta eat a better diet

There was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded. One's bald, one's in a boat, they're both unconscious.

[bebemoon]

“Inverness, Capital of the Highlands” by @castlesofscotland on ig .

[fairycosmos]

hey be nice to me im just a teenage girl who has legally been an adult for years

[babtest]

went to an elementaryschool musical production and they started the show with the director saying: "Now there's some very small viewers here today, so just so you know. There will be a scary character later in the show. This is her," and a girl in a kinda scary ghost outfit did a creepy walk across the stage, then stood up straight and did a cheery wave, "but remember, it's just Nina. She's pretending to be scary."

Aaaand i would very much like for horror movies to have that as a little bonus feature you can chose. Let me start a movie with Guillermo del Toro showing me a scary ghost that might jump at me, but don't worry, thats just Doug!

[catboygirljoker]

i hate driving. here are the laws! if you break them there will be consequences! except youre also expected to break the law just a little bit. people will get mad at you if you dont. you dont have right of way but the person who does is waving you forward for some reason. here's the speed limit! it's not the speed limit, the actual speed limit is that plus ~5-10. the light is green but you're in the turning lane. can you go? should you have gone just then? the person behind you is honking at you. there's a weird noise coming from your engine; if you try to do the right thing and get it checked out, will you get scammed? you are driving a 1-2 ton metal machine rocketing at speeds unknown to humankind for most of history. around a million people die in car accidents every year; that's about one person every thirty seconds. if you take that seriously and try to drive safely then people get mad at you.

[sandibullock]

DEAD TO ME 3.05 || 3.10

[sophsun1]

Charmed – 4.07: Brain Drain

[happyheidi]

[sanayeon]

MOMO ✩ FUKUOKA ENCORE

[amilkyway]

fireflies lighting up a rural Pennsylvania field at dusk

[spaghettinatural]

As a european i sometimes forget furefkied are actually real and not american folklore/cryptids. Like you’ve got friendly little bugs that glow in the dark….. b r uh

[blennie]

woah woah ladies, settle down...... (talking to my digestive organs)

[detentiontrack]

"aborted fetuses are not technically lives and it's harmful and not medically accurate to refer to them that way" and "people who have early miscarriages of wanted pregnancies are still allowed to grieve and consider them their child" are two statements that can and should coexist

[detentiontrack]

"people who made the difficult decision to have an abortion because it's right for them and their situation are still allowed to grieve how things could have been if their circumstances had been different" is another statement that should be added

[andhumanslovedstories]

Not only should we ungender gendered things, we should gender ungendered things. A bra is merely an object of function for whomever may need it. A cheese wheel is a lady and she is stunning.

[orchidvioletindigo]

It should 100% be illegal for companies to make you give them your payment information when you sign up for a free trial version of their product. It is not necessary and there is no good fucking reason for them to do it. It’s blatantly just so they can steal forgetful customers’ money.

[saint-batrick]

oh hey, thanks for reminding me to cancel a free trial i had going on.

[tattooedzombigirl]

Reblog to save an unnecessary charge cause it also reminded me to cancel a trial lol

not to sound too millennial here but it annoys me so much when I’m at a restaurant and someone I’m with will complain about the service being slow like buddy pal it’s fine it’s not that important

[botesregias-deactivated20180419]

You didn’t waited 40 minutes for a dinner before haven’t you?

[gothicprep]

i have but i also have, like, real problems

[jdragsky]

[carrie-kelley-deserved-better]

[porcelainpolkadots]

unironically love the phrase “but I’m being so brave about it” because truly, like, what other choice do we have in this wretched existence? what a beautiful way to remind yourself to keep going, even if only out of spite

[severalbadpunslater]