@eyesfullyopen - Tumblr Blog

what do people even DO you know like what is there to even DO

Me: But am I really manic? *eats crisps for breakfast, forgets to eat any meals and only has some chocolate throughout the rest of the day*

Me: I just don't know. *doesn't want to sleep at night, is bright and alert despite medication that usually knocks me out, is alert in the morning despite medication*

Me: What if I've been making it up this whole time...? *wants to party, hypersexual, wants to drink all the alcohol, considers drugs maybe 'not that bad'*

Me: I'm so dumb. Maybe I just have severe depression, not bipolar? *freaks out because there are ghosts everywhere, is suddenly very productive, irritated by everyone, craves food constantly but is too busy to get food, makes a rational argument for why I'm Satan, wants to love EVERYONE, needy for touch and affection and love*

Me: *sigh* I'm such a faker

multiversemadness

everything is either too boring or too exhausting there’s no in between

shes-a-walking-disorder

i think learning to sob silently and clean yourself up quickly should be considered fine art

getoutgetoutgetout

hypomanic feels

I want to run a million miles

nothing can hurt me

I don’t want to sleep ever there is no need or time for sleep

punch the walls it’s a good stim

maybe if I scream for an hour this will stop

pacing in circles because your thoughts are moving to fast to sit still and do anything

thinking happy thoughts but feeling numb bc dissociation

I’m making this all up for attention

justhypersexualthings

being a hypersexual maladaptive daydreamer and all you daydream about is sex

cc-h79

😒😒😒😒part 2

brbgensokyo

seaferntides-blog

has the past year actually been real or have i just dissociated through everything

lamictall

i think one of the biggest sources of insecurity that comes with mental illness is the knowledge that your emotions aren’t always representative of where you’re at. of course they’re still valid, but you still know like, hey, i would’ve reacted to this totally differently had i not been depressed/manic/in a mixed mood/psychotic ep or my perception of the event itself wasn’t totally realistic etc. and it’s so much harder to build a self concept because… well which part is me? which part is the illness? people say “you’re not your illness!” but who am i then?

disneydailly

marrymejasonsegel

I wrote a college paper once about gender dynamics in Disney films, and part dealt with the emphasis of androgyny in this film. Mulan is an outsider and unsure of her position of the world when she is adhering to both a total feminine role (the matchmaking scene) and a total masculine role (disguised as a male soldier) and it’s only when she’s able to embrace both sides that she is able to fully showcase her abilities and ultimately save the day.

The entire climax, from climbing the poles using sashes, counting on Shan Yu’s complete dismissal of women to get the Emperor to safety, to this scene where she literally uses a symbol of womanhood (within the movie at least) to disarm the villain of his symbol of masculinity and beat him at his own game, shows Mulan relying on the aspects of her femininity that she has grown up adhering to and adapting the tactical knowledge and fighting skills that she learned disguised as a male soldier to those aspects. The result is a unique and innovative view of the world and her course of action that leads her to save the day when the male soldiers failed and the women wouldn’t even have been allowed to try.