it was new years eve, 2026
my aunt was visiting and we were having hot chocolate. she agreed to watch Stranger Things with me (even tho she had never heard of it and couldn't care less). we toddled to the sofa, watched a recap so she understood the context, and started the new episodes. i had waited to see Volume 2 and 3 together because i wanted the full experience.
first, Shock Jock.
then, Escape from Camazotz
and finally... The Bridge.
she's been hearing me scream every single time Byler interacts. she's asked if they're a couple. i say "not yet". i'm glued to the tv. i know it's coming any moment now.
Joyce is talking to Will. i'm shaking at the edge of my sit. "is gonna happen" i say. Mike enters the frame. I scream my head off. IT'S HAPPENING, IT'S FINALLY HAPPENING.
they pan to a room full of people. ok, maybe it's not how i wanted it to go, but it still goes, right? it still goes because they've been hinting at it all season. it's a long time coming. even my aunt can see it and she's known of the existence of these two boys since a couple hours ago.
Will says Mike is... just his Tammy? my aunt asks who is Tammy. i explain. she just says "huh, weren't they a couple?". i remind her that not really. Will finishes his monologue. we go straight to battle. ok, i think, they're focused on survival, it's not time yet.
we finish the episode and immediately jump to Episode 8. The Rightside Up.
i'm thinking the episode will probably finish with this wrapped up, so i'm not waiting anything at the start. but i'm a little less shaky. i'm not that nervous. but then they start to climb the tower.
Mike is holding some type of yellow juice as Will enters the frame. the whole background is blue. I squeak a little. the hints are there.
They start talking. I start shaking again.
"that came out wrong- well, not came out wrong" I'm nearly crying. it's happening now. my aunt laughs and says they're cute. they really are.
"what matters is that you're still here" yes it does, you guys are together "and that you think we can still be friends" wait what-
"friends? no thanks. best friends" ... what?
i look at my aunt. she looks at me. she just puts her arm round me and we watch as they leave the tower. what comes next is just a really, really painful death. with every scene, i get a little bit more discouraged.
i'd been waiting for this for months, years. and the realization that it was never coming creeped in. still, i hang onto a little bit of hope. hey, maybe this makes sense. i love this characters, if Mike is just straight that isn't a crime. crushes don't have to be reciprocated to be okay.
but then Jane decides she's better off. and my aunts grabs me a little bit tighter. i know we both know it's sad. i know she knows watching the message that someone has to kill themselves to break free of the cycle of abuse is hurting me. we don't say it. we haven't talked about it in years. we just know.
we watch as the guys play DnD one last time. they all convince themselves that Jane is okay in some far, far away land. and that she's better off.
everybody is crying. but they don't look like happy tears. they look like tears filled with regrets and sadness and pain. they don't look like "we're going off to college but we love each other" tears. they look like "i hate that this is how we end" tears.
my aunt says it sucked. i say i'm sorry. she says we can kick off the year better. so we play a little uno and call it a night.
but i haven't been able to stop thinking about that night. i've cried multiple times, not being able to understand how could i be so wrong when i was so sure. but i've also laughed my ass off with people that share this same pain, sharing stories and thoughts. we felt ignored, used and, in a way, scammed. when all we wanted was to be seen. to have a little bit or representation here and there.
and these thoughts have keep pilling and compressing into a corner in my head.
Robby and Vickie didn't have to break up at all. Not with a lousy reason at least.
Nancy and Jonathan either, maybe so, but they didn't have to.
Steve could've felt like he had a purpose after highschool.
Dustin didn't get to acknowledge Susie, or his dreams, not a lot of things really.
Lucas isn't just a boyfriend. He is also his own person. We never get to see that.
Max shouldn't have to be a perfect recovery story when she has so much to work through and she deserves to do so.
Jane shouldn't have been cornered into killing herself.
Mike should accept himself, instead of looking regretful at every turn.
And Will should feel wanted and loved.
so I've decided I'm rewriting Stranger Things. since season 3 at least (more details to come!)
because at the end of the day,
everybody deserves better.
s-u-f-j-a-n-s-t-e-v-e-n-s
germansingergirl
romaincrisis
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