FactuallyFsychotic

I'm diagnosed psychosis because I told my doctor I didn't want a permanent label in case I got better. That was 8 years ago. I make jokes because why use healthy coping techniques when you can have a laugh? I'm actually a bit of a softie so if you do have a problem, feel free to send an ask. PLEASE DO NOT PM ME. Anyone is welcome to follow this blog.

[factuallyfsychotic]

How people expect schizophrenia to look:

Me, at witching hour: hmm, full moon tonight, suddenly have a murderous urge

What schizophrenia is more likely to look like:

Me, at 15:00 in my local park, throwing bread to passer-bys while sobbing 'IS THIS WHAT YOU WANT?!" to some nearby ducks

[factuallyfsychotic]

The Voices, in the middle of a supermarket: MILK

Me: No bitch, we vegan now, we getting soya

[factuallyfsychotic]

I would like to announce that I am now self-diagnosing as mentally stable and would like to be treated as such. If you would all now please begin to ignore my doctors, that would be great.

Thank you for your time.

[factuallyfsychotic]

hey I'm. Worried that I faked my schizophrenia (and everything else tbh), because I'm mostly aware that my delusions are delusions, and they're not that bad anyway, especially since I'm taking meds. So I was wondering if stopping taking my meds would make me feel more "valid" and "real"? I know that doesn't sound like a good idea but I need them back. Sorry for bothering you I just needed to tell someone

No, you'll just feel like shit. You'll probably still have that delusion even after you stop taking them. Stay on your meds.

It's not worth coming off them in the persuit of feeling valid.

[factuallyfsychotic]

I call myself a witch but sometimes I just wonder if I’m delusional. I see things, a lot of very detailed things. And little men. But I can’t decide if that’s because I see them, or because I want to see them. I also can’t decide if they are real or in my head. I also can’t decide if there is even really a difference. I don’t want to tell people, because I’m not even sure if I’m actually experiencing what I am possibly experiencing. What if I just subconsciously want -

Well, it can be hard to convince yourself that magical things aren’t real, so I wouldn’t start there, but you can convince yourself that you’re not one of them. Like say magical things do exist, what is the chance you would be one of them? Very slim.

As for the little men, nobody wants to hallucinate. Not even witches.

[spill-out-the-words]

What makes it so slim? How do you know? It’s just, like, common opinion doesn’t account for other things. We all just say what we think we know is true. Regardless of whether magical things exist, I experience something. Regardless of whether my brain is fine/average and I am self deluded, or whether this is something more going on, the things I have experienced aren’t new to human experience. Basically: Everything to me seems just as likely true as it is unlikey to be.

So which is which? Can things be true and untrue at the same time?

It all confuses the shit out of me. I don’t fully believe in things and I also don’t completely not believe in them. I simply have no clue.

And I don’t mind the little men. But I’m not so sure they count as hallucinations. I don’t see them the way I see myself and others. I see them differently. Which, doesn’t make sense but I can’t really explain it. Anyway, as I said I don’t mind them. I just wish I could find a person that experienced similar things.

[factuallyfsychotic]

Sorry, I’ve put this off for a while because I was trying to make it a non-mega reply, I think I’ve found a way.

The chances of it being slim I’m going to just list and briefly explain:

Percentage of population: it’s very likely a very small percentage of the population or it would be a much more popular superstition than it actually is

Genetic factors: it’s more likely to be genetic (as obviously not a lifestyle choice) than random, which lowers your odds again because your odds decrease with each family member. Then there’s the odds that it is your family that has the gene, which is even less than the percentage of population

General statistics: don’t get me wrong, statistics mean absolutely nothing to the individual, but that’s where the very slim comes in

Our senses are our reality, I’m not denying your experience I’m questioning whether it adheres to the mass reality we all live in. An easy solution would be trying to prove it to someone else. Not me please, that shit really freaks me the fuck out. Like even no jokes and I fucking love a wind up.

It kind of feels like you’ve had one too many drinks in the company of schrodinger and have never recovered from it! Antonyms cannot be in the same state at the same time. That was an applied example tailored to our mass reality.

I’d say it counts. What do they do?

[spill-out-the-words]

I see.

Last thoughts:

1. I won’t tell you more out of respect for your request.

2. antonyms can, that’s what an oxymoron is. If you don’t understand what I’m trying to express by that then it’s okay.

Words fall short of true experience.

What’s true in one sense can be false in another and no one sees anything in complete objectivity. The nature of our existence provides that everyone has a personal perspective lens (refined by time and experience). You can’t experience our kind of consciousness and be able to evaluate reality fairly.

——-

In regards to the little men. They don’t do much of anything. They don’t talk. Sometimes they just stand still. Sometimes they move chaotiy without rhyme or reason. Sometimes they dance. Once I saw them climbing in from my window. I see their little hands and faces stickin out from this crawl space thing next to my bed. Last night I could have sworn I saw them riding small horses

[factuallyfsychotic]

I mean true about oxymorons, but I tend to find oxymorons only exist when speaking of the subjective, e.g. stupid genius

I'm not saying you're wrong at all, I'm honestly just converting what you're saying into what I'd tell myself, as tbh it's not that I don't believe in it and even with the probability I could still be convinced, but I don't wanna be like "believe what u want sis as long as its not hurting anybody" because honestly I don't think that's a good approach if it is psychosis, ya know? Got to tackle the good things as well as the bad things or we just leave room for the bad things.

[factuallyfsychotic]

I've been having a rather upsetting delusion. It can be triggering but I want to talk about it. And reality check? I've been trying not to fall into it, but it just feels right.

Talk away. Talking can be the thing that makes you say, nah this is too crazy even for my medicated ass.

[gravehop187]

[mitochondiva]

[factuallyfsychotic]

Most people get given nicknames by their friends. Me? I've just allocated my own nickname. Fafsy. Pronounced FAFF-SEE.

Or eternal overlord. Again pronounced FAFF-SEE.

Whatever floats your boat.

[factuallyfsychotic]

I call myself a witch but sometimes I just wonder if I’m delusional. I see things, a lot of very detailed things. And little men. But I can’t decide if that’s because I see them, or because I want to see them. I also can’t decide if they are real or in my head. I also can’t decide if there is even really a difference. I don’t want to tell people, because I’m not even sure if I’m actually experiencing what I am possibly experiencing. What if I just subconsciously want -

Well, it can be hard to convince yourself that magical things aren’t real, so I wouldn’t start there, but you can convince yourself that you’re not one of them. Like say magical things do exist, what is the chance you would be one of them? Very slim.

As for the little men, nobody wants to hallucinate. Not even witches.

[spill-out-the-words]

What makes it so slim? How do you know? It’s just, like, common opinion doesn’t account for other things. We all just say what we think we know is true. Regardless of whether magical things exist, I experience something. Regardless of whether my brain is fine/average and I am self deluded, or whether this is something more going on, the things I have experienced aren’t new to human experience. Basically: Everything to me seems just as likely true as it is unlikey to be.

So which is which? Can things be true and untrue at the same time?

It all confuses the shit out of me. I don’t fully believe in things and I also don’t completely not believe in them. I simply have no clue.

And I don’t mind the little men. But I’m not so sure they count as hallucinations. I don’t see them the way I see myself and others. I see them differently. Which, doesn’t make sense but I can’t really explain it. Anyway, as I said I don’t mind them. I just wish I could find a person that experienced similar things.

[factuallyfsychotic]

Sorry, I've put this off for a while because I was trying to make it a non-mega reply, I think I've found a way.

The chances of it being slim I'm going to just list and briefly explain:

Percentage of population: it's very likely a very small percentage of the population or it would be a much more popular superstition than it actually is

Genetic factors: it's more likely to be genetic (as obviously not a lifestyle choice) than random, which lowers your odds again because your odds decrease with each family member. Then there's the odds that it is your family that has the gene, which is even less than the percentage of population

General statistics: don't get me wrong, statistics mean absolutely nothing to the individual, but that's where the very slim comes in

Our senses are our reality, I'm not denying your experience I'm questioning whether it adheres to the mass reality we all live in. An easy solution would be trying to prove it to someone else. Not me please, that shit really freaks me the fuck out. Like even no jokes and I fucking love a wind up.

It kind of feels like you've had one too many drinks in the company of schrodinger and have never recovered from it! Antonyms cannot be in the same state at the same time. That was an applied example tailored to our mass reality.

I'd say it counts. What do they do?

[factuallyfsychotic]

I call myself a witch but sometimes I just wonder if I’m delusional. I see things, a lot of very detailed things. And little men. But I can’t decide if that’s because I see them, or because I want to see them. I also can’t decide if they are real or in my head. I also can’t decide if there is even really a difference. I don’t want to tell people, because I’m not even sure if I’m actually experiencing what I am possibly experiencing. What if I just subconsciously want -

Well, it can be hard to convince yourself that magical things aren't real, so I wouldn't start there, but you can convince yourself that you're not one of them. Like say magical things do exist, what is the chance you would be one of them? Very slim.

As for the little men, nobody wants to hallucinate. Not even witches.

[factuallyfsychotic]

what do i do when people denying my delusions just feeds into them lmao, like this reality is absolutely fake and i feel like there’s other beings controlling us all and other people telling me that this is real just makes me think it’s The Beings TM making them say that so that I don’t figure out that this isn’t real life fucken hell aaaa

Find a way to cope that doesn't involve other people.

I find beta-blockers help with that sort of thing. The lack of adrenaline seems to help a lot.

[factuallyfsychotic]

idk if i’m psychotic yet but i think i might be. my dad bought cereal and i started thinking that he’s buying things i like so that i can be happy before i kill myself. probably psychotic right?

I don't know, I'm not medically qualified to tell you if something is a symptom of psychosis or not, but it's definitely paranoia, which you should always consult you GP about because it could be

[factuallyfsychotic]

Not a question but I love your blog:)

Cheers pal

[factuallyfsychotic]

I think I need a reality check but I have no idea how to do that... you're one of the only psychosis blogs I know so I hope it's okay I'm sending this

Sorry I'm a little late, what's the belief distorting your reality friend?

[factuallyfsychotic]

I feel like it’s not funny to joke about psychotic killing sprees and I don’t want ppl to associate psychotic people with mass murders😢

I found the image on a group in Facebook, just wanted to share how ridiculous it was by poking fun at it

[factuallyfsychotic]

Just hate it when I go on a "psychotic killing spree" and haven't got my favourite playlist