A character who wants to die but is well aware that they do want to live, despite everything. They want to live, to take a nice stroll around the town, to watch the sunset peacefully, to cook something, to read as many books as they want, to try out different kind of hobbies, as many as there is, to experience something - that is the will live, to want to experience something, because deep inside you still cherish a lot of things and want to try them out, and yet, after so many years of living, they can no longer bear it; they can no longer bear to live in a world they don't think they deserve to exist within; they can no longer bear to live in a world where people continue to wrong them or hurt them; they can longer bear to live in a world they can't find happiness in - and they seek death because of it, thinking it will finally free them from it all. And yet, deep inside, they want to live. They just cannot think of any other solution.
