Peter Solarz
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Xuebing Du
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Keni
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
shark vs the universe
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@feixingtaibei
i suddenly remembered carl gene fordham’s blog the other day and thought i’d share two great posts from there about academic chinese writing. carl gene is a translator and interpreter, and he’s got some great content on the blog if you go digging!
40 Terms Commonly Used in Chinese Academic Writing
Useful Sentence Structures for Chinese Academic Writing
Today was one of those days where you just write it off and hope that the next day will be better. I kept everything to minimum. One thing I did do today was start xiaojun’s drama (he’s from wayv) on YouTube. The episodes are only around 5 minutes and good for listening practice. I actually was surprised that I could understand a bit of this episode because it was just really basic introductory conversation/questions. And I could pick out characters that I recognized. I followed what Taylor did using learn languages with YouTube and I saved the script so I can follow along. I really like it because I can make notes of phrases I didn’t know. And YouTube videos tend to be a lot shorter than dramas/tv shows. I actually want to try this with korean maybe this weekend. Also I don’t follow manty Chinese studygrams is there anyone you guys recommend
Mandarin resources (free) Beginner.
HSK 1 LIST
Simplified and Traditional (with pinyin), exercises and sentences examples Link
TONES
*Tone explanation (but with words with more than 1 syllable, which is great because the hard part is when a word has 2 o more syllables) Link
More tones! Link
*Youtube vid explaining tones and exceptions (like tone modification and the half 3 and 4 tones) Link Link2 (edit 1)
** Tone pairs youtube vid by Yoyo Chinese (Individual tones 0:00-8:30 // Tone pairs 8:30-27) Link (edit 10)
Tone pairs chart + Exercises from said chart (edit 9)
Tone pairs + audio for all the tone combinations Link (Edit 11)
*Exercises: (edit 7)
which tones do you hear (tone pairs)
another which tones do you hear (single syllab or tone pairs)
match pinyin + tone to the sound
match the sound to the pinyin + tone
differenciate between tones
tone speaking practice (listen and repeat recording yourself)
PINYIN
Pinyin introduction (follow the “Pronunciation Index”) Link (edit 10)
Pinyin chart from Yoyo chinese Link (edit 9)
*Pinyin and tones self quiz (i love this one) Link
*Course: Phonetics with Chinese Characteristics (edit 8)
Youtube (in english) Link
Youtube (in spanish) Link
Exercises: (edit 7)
Pinyin spelling
READING, TEXT + AUDIO
Text with characters, pinyin, english translations and audio Link
Characters with pinyin and audio. Traditional and simplified option. If you click on a word the meaning of it pops up, but not the whole sentence Link
Dialogues with characters, pinyin, translations (in Spanish) and audio Link
Spanish web with different topics and sentences. it has games to practice too Link (edit 4)
Youtube reading for kids. Link1 Link2 (edit 2) (If you cant find any audiobooks with text, there’s probably someone reading a book of it on youtube)
Du Chinese (App) Link
Beelingua (App)
SENTENCES
Chengyu list (edit 8)
125 lessons with different sentences. It has characters, audio, pinying and different exercises to test them in each lesson. Link
Diferent dialogues (directions, weather, introductions, shopping) with audio characters, pinyin and english Link (edit 1)
* Podcast: 2/3 sentences, broken down by topic and by words Link (edit 2) [I use this one when im in the street and i repeat what they say trying to memorise it]
WEB COURSE (edit 5)
From ”ChineseClass101″. Those have characters with the option simplified/traditional, pinyin and english translation. It also comes sometimes with a brief cultural insight and grammar lesson, all with audio and class trasncription. Really useful because besides the audio class, you have a vocab list with the audio option played 0.5x slower
Getting Started
Absolute Beginner Season 1
Level 1 Chinese
FLASHCARDS
Anki, HSK 1 vocab Link
Anki, HSK 1 grammar Link
*TOFU learn ( Web / App) this is like a flashcard app but with the option to quiz yourself (with 6 choices to answer instead of the usual 2) and the exciting part: it can quiz you on the writing too! It has many deck choices too. Big fav of mine (edit 12)
DICTIONARY (edit 6)
Character dictionaries:
Line dict = Pinyin, with audio, english definition, sample sentences and animated stroke order. Also a daily “Today’s expresion/quote” addittion which is cool.
Chinesepod = simplified and traditional, english translation, sample sentences
Sentence dictionaries:
Chinese yabla = breaks the sentence into words, each one with pinyin and english translation.
EXTENSIONS
*Language Learning with Youtube, Chrome extension. Allows 2 sets of subtitles (example: vid of Idol Producer) (edit 9)
*Zhongwen: Chinese-English Dictionary by: Christian Schiller, Chorme extension. Allows you to hoover over the hanzi in Chrome and shows the pinyin and meaning (edit 4)
BOOKS (edit 4)
(Not free, sadly) For grammar and some course book i would recomend
HSK 1
New Practical Chinese Reader 1 Textbook/Workbook
OTHER (random interesting stuff that I don’t know where to put them in this list)
Learn Chinese with Poems, free course (edit 9)
Learn Chinese with Songs, free course (edit 9)
**Frecuency list –> Most common characters and words in: books, movies, components and by HSK. Simplified and traditional options. (Sound, definition, animated stroke order, sentence examples w audio, and writting practice. Very interesting and complete.) (edit 9)
Media input (Videos and Audios with transcriptions and timestamps you can get back to. First click on the character shows pinyin, second click shows meaning.) (edit 9)
Youtube Channel: Learn Chinese with Movies, series and animation (edit 12)
What are your favourite songs and shows to inmerse yourself in mandarin? Please tell me!
My favourite links have a (*)
I might get back to this post and add more useful links when i find more (each time i edit this post i add a little “edit 1 / 2 / 3…”). [This post looks better on the original post/blog, since the linked webs are highlighted and easier to see, and also is more up to date]
Last edited: 13 / December / 2020 = Edit 12
reblogging again to add that the Zhongwen extension is available for Firefox too. I use it and I also use the Perapera extension which serves the same function, but sometimes I need to go back and forth between the two just to confirm a word’s meaning.
Chinese Grammar
- using 了 http://resources.allsetlearning.com/chinese/grammar/Uses_of_%22le%22
- using 把 https://grammar.chineseboost.com/ba-structure-usage-basics/
- using 着 http://resources.allsetlearning.com/chinese/grammar/Aspect_particle_%22zhe%22
- using 被 http://cn.hujiang.com/new/p539207/
- using 的、地、得 https://grammar.chineseboost.com/de-grammar-summary/
- using 就 and 才 https://eastasiastudent.net/china/mandarin/jiu-cai-early-as-not-until/
- using 为 http://resources.allsetlearning.com/chinese/grammar/%22For%22_with_%22wei%22
- using （正）在 http://resources.allsetlearning.com/chinese/grammar/Expressing_actions_in_progress_(full_form)
- using 在 vs. 又 http://resources.allsetlearning.com/chinese/grammar/Comparing_%22zai%22_and_%22you%22
- using 是…的 https://grammar.chineseboost.com/shi4-de/
that one time on Hotel Hell when Gordon Ramsay fed the owner’s dog some shitty bread and then was afraid he killed her
He checked her pulse
Wonderful things about people learning a new language:
When they have no idea how to balance the formality of their word choices and the severity of their cursing, so it’s neutral at -
nvm I can’t explain it eloquently with words, I made a chart.
be with people who make you feel like yourself. be with people who have never judged you for your flaws. with those who make flowers bloom in your chest, with those who feel like a warm blanket. they'll always cherish you. ♡
journal spread ³⁰/⁰³
I have recently started learning mandarin by myself since my school doesn’t offer any classes, I was wondering if you have any tips for studying or websites that I could use?
Hi there, sorry I took so long to answer this because this answer took me a really long time to compile 😂 First of all, great to know you are learning Chinese! Actually Mandarin is just a spoken form of Chinese, but I assume you are planning to learn how to read and write Chinese as well :D I’ve received quite a few questions about learning Chinese ever since I started this blog, so I thought I should write a detailed answer about this.
LONG ANSWER AHEAD
Before you start, do note there are actually two sets of (overlapping) Chinese characters out there,
1. Traditional Chinese characters (used in Taiwan and Hong Kong)
2. Simplified Chinese characters (used in Mainland China, Singapore and Malaysia).
I’m from Singapore so I learned simplified Chinese, I can generally read traditional Chinese as well though I have great difficulty writing them because I’m too used to simplified characters 😂😂 You don’t have to learn both, but it’s good to know the difference since you will probably encounter both types of characters at some point when you are studying Chinese/ consuming Chinese entertainment.
I definitely recommend learning Hanyu pinyin to help with the pronunciation of the words, but do note that pinyin is neither the Chinese alphabet nor meant to be a substitute for Chinese characters. There is no alphabet for Chinese… we do have Chinese radicals (further explained here) which is not really an alphabet but more like components of a character 🤔 For the most part, to learn Chinese characters you have to memorise them. Maybe you can set yourself a goal of memorising a few characters a day to kickstart the process, actually if possible I would recommend getting a Chinese copy book/app like this one:
Writing the characters over and over is the best way to remember the words imo, also this will help you practise your handwriting!
A good dictionary is a must, for Chinese-English dictionaries the best one I have tried so far is the app Pleco. I used to have this book of 成语 (Chinese idioms) and 俗语 (Chinese sayings) as well that I had to memorise for school, but I think you can just learn them online (found some here) if you want :D You should probably wait till your Chinese reaches intermediate~advanced level before starting on those though, if not the whole thing might be kind of confusing.
For websites, I have never tried learning Chinese online before so I don’t have first-hand experience of any of the online Chinese learning sites, but I did find this list of online resources for learning Chinese which is really comprehensive. it covers sites and apps for everything from reading and writing Chinese characters to all types of podcasts. Actually you know what, there are more resources available online than I thought, there are even apps for you to connect to native Chinese speakers (I didn’t even know those existed until I wrote this answer) 👀 That list of sites and apps pretty much covers every aspect of learning Chinese so I don’t have much else to add tbh 😂😂 Just gonna recommend some entertainment options that will hopefully make your learning process more enjoyable!
(Below are mostly my personal song/ show/ manhua recommendations)
For songs there are really way too many so it’s kind of hard to draw up a list, maybe you can start with the songs of some of the more famous artistes like Jay Chou, A-mei, Eason Chan, Faye Wong, Mayday, Stefani Sun, Jam Hsiao… You can search for Mandopop playlists on Spotify for a start! I’m personally quite fond of 逃跑计划, Lala Hsu and 陈粒’s songs.
Also randomly recommending 夜空中最亮的星 and 平凡之路 because they are my favourite songs (夜空中最亮的星 almost made me cry the first time I heard it, even now after listening to it for so many times it still gives me the same feeling 👵🏻).
For dramas my favourite drama by far is Nirvana in Fire (琅琊榜), which imo is the best drama I’ve ever watched. My sister and I were obsessed with this show and recommended it to all our friends, it was so good!!
(side note I think Hu Ge’s face is especially suited for historical dramas)
Some other dramas I liked were Ode to Joy, The Fierce wife (Taiwanese) and The Legend of Zhen Huan, Nirvana in Fire Season 2 was also just released this year! My friend recommends Tens Miles of Peach Blossoms which she said made her cry a lot, and I think Yang Mi’s latest drama The Negotiator is quite popular too though I haven’t watched it yet. I actually don’t have a lot of dramas to recommend because I don’t really watch them 😂😂 But coming from someone who don’t particularly like watching dramas, Nirvana in Fire is really so freaking good…
Anyway besides songs and dramas, my other recommendations are 1) Web novels and 2) Manhua.
I highly recommend reading web novels (I mostly read on them on qidian), the Chinese web novel community is seriously gigantic and I’ve honestly only explored a very very very tiny fraction of their offerings because there are so many popular web novels out there. Btw even if you can’t read Chinese there are English sites (webnovel l wuxiaworld) where you can read the Chinese web novels translated into English for free, so you can enjoy them regardless of your Chinese abilities :D One well-known novel on both the English and Chinese site is The King’s Avatar (全职高手), which was made into a gorgeous Chinese anime last year
First episode here!
Btw if you download the qidian app they have this audio book function that I thought was pretty handy, you can listen to your favourite novels being read to you ->
(Click 听书 and it will lead to the audio)
(One of my favourite novels 惊悚乐园／Thriller Paradise!)
For manhua I mostly read my manhua on kuaikanmanhua, 腾讯动漫 and occasionally dongmanmanhua. I made a short list of BL recommendations previously here, some other non-BL manhua I’m currently following are:
DOLO命运胶囊 (the art for this series is really beautiful)
女王的手术刀
哥哥是大笨蛋
看脸时代 (This one is Korean and really popular, it’s translated into English as well under the title Lookism but personally I prefer the Chinese translation)
A friend of mine recommended Duoluo Dalu (novel here) and Battle Through The Heavens (novel here) which I haven’t read yet, but if I’m not wrong both series are popular 👀
That’s all I can think of for now! Kind of off topic but from the perspective of an overseas Chinese I think Mainland Chinese entertainment have improved a lot in recent years. When I was young I could only remember a few shows from China like 还珠格格, Journey to the West, and Return of the Condor Heroes, and my own childhood was dominated by Japanese manga and Taiwanese Mandopop/ idol dramas (that’s how I learned to read traditional Chinese lol). But now there is an increasing number of quality productions from China, which is great for someone like me who is fond of Chinese entertainment (sadly Singapore’s Chinese entertainment scene is pretty lacking and Hong Kong and Taiwan’s entertainment industry have been declining, Singapore is currently pretty much dominated by Kpop and K-dramas). Hopefully Chinese entertainment will continue to get better and better in the near future ^^
In any case this list is non-exhaustive, but my answer is getting way too long so I’ll just stop here. I’ll add any future recommendations under the recs tag, hope this helps!
what i liked the most about this post is the entertainment part of the recommendation (music, drama, novel, manhua etc.).. i always find my mandarin learning speed up a little if i immersed myself w something that i enjoyed in this case manhua (comic/manga)
so thank you so much for this. if this helps a little, here is where i stashed my mandarin learning resources. you can find online/offline materials there & great blogs to follow.
thanks again, op!
“沈升”
♡ My vocab list for manhua “ 沈升 ” ♡
· 人生-rén shēng - life (one’s time on earth)
· 值得一提 - zhí de yī tí – to be worth mentioning
· 波折 - bō zhé – twists and turns (事情发生了波折。)
· 置身于 - zhì shēnyú -within
· 索然无味 - suǒ rán wú wèi – dull, flat, insipid (idiom)
· 摒弃 - bìng qì-to abandon; to discard; to spurn; to forsake
· 自由- zì yóu-freedom; free; liberty
Sentences that I struggled with:
在应该置身于索然无味的世纪的时候摒弃自由。
[while] existing in a dull century, you should abandon freedom.
就这么一直活到现在 -(that’s all the time?)
· 活到现在 - huó dào xiàn zài- to live to the present
· 3Q ~ - 三Q – thank you (●'◡'●)
· 不愧 （是）- bù kuì – to be worthy of, to deserve to be called, prove oneself to be
· 瞎 – xia – to no purpose
· 严苛 - yán kē – severe, harsh
· 家伙 - jiā huo -（coll.）guy, fellow
· 撞倒 - zhuàng dǎo - to knock down，to knock over，to run over (sb)
· 承认 - chéng rèn – to admit
· 倒霉 - dǎo méi – have bad luck, be out of luck
· 可怜 - kě lián- have pity, show mercy // pitiful, pathetic
凛冽的目光 – piercing gaze
· 夕阳 - xī yang – evening sun, setting sun
Vocabulary List
Personality Traits
聪明 cōng míng clever, intelligent
机智 jī zhì quick-witted
任性 rèn xìng strong-willed
独立 dú lì independent
勤劳 qín láo hardworking
熟练 shú liàn skilled
有主见 yǒu zhǔ jiàn having strong views/opinions
My family is not very religious most of the time. We pray at Christmas and Easter and Thanksgiving dinners, and my mom’s entire side of the family excluding her parents and siblings is hardcore religious so whenever we do anything with them it’s kind of religious.
But the point is, most of the time we aren’t, but every year at Christmas time, a church in the next town over puts on a Bethlehem and it’s kind of a tradition to go. They go all out. The building is massive, and they’ve got it all decked out. There’s animals and stalls and everyone is in costume and in character. When you get there, they give you some pennies and you can go and barter for cool little trinkets, and there’s other more expensive things you can buy with your own money. And they have the best apple cider. All in all, it’s pretty cool.
But anyway. We go every year, bundled up in hats and scarves and mittens, and have a good time. We’ve been doing it for as long as I can remember, and my mom talks about going when she was a kid.
I’m going to mention again that everyone is massively in character, especially the really super hardcore religious adults. Because this is an important fact.
Every year since I was about thirteen or so, there’s been this one lady who worked at a stall selling ponchos (I have, like, three. They’re really cool). She was probably there before that, but I was thirteen when she started trying to barter for me to marry her son, who was also about thirteen.
“What a pretty little thing. I think you’d make a very good wife for my son. These are your parents? I’ll give you six goats for your daughter’s marriage to my son.”
Her son, meanwhile, is in the “shop” behind her looking absolutely mortified and like he’d rather be anywhere else than there, and I’m pretty sure I probably looked just as embarrassed.
My parents gave her some sort of excuse, like it wasn’t enough goats or they weren’t ready to marry me off yet or something, and we moved on.
The next year we’re back again, and come up near to the same stall.
“Ah! You’re back again! Have you married your daughter off yet? I can up my offer to nine goats and three chickens for your daughter to marry my son.”
Somehow she remembered the exact people she’d tried to buy their daughter off of for an entire year? So my parents are refusing her offers again and me and the son are trading embarrassed looks and we go on our way.
And then it happens again. And again. And again. Each and every one of the last six years this lady has tried to buy me in goats to be her son’s wife.
A couple years ago when we were waiting in line to get inside my mom jokingly said that they should accept this year and see what she’d do and I completely refused because it was mortifying enough as it was.
One year we brought my friend with us and we’re waiting outside and my sister was like “Are you gonna sell Kee this year?” and my dad was like “Maybe if there’s enough goats” and my friend was confused as heck and I was like “This lady tries to buy me to marry her son every year. I told you that” and she’s like “Yeah but I didn’t think this was a thing that actually happened” and she was still skeptical and by the time my parents had finished refusing the lady’s offer, she’s killing herself laughing and then spent the next few months telling me I couldn’t look at guys because I already had a fiancée.
Anyway, it happened again this Christmas and the son has somehow gotten almost ridiculously attractive since last year. The speech this year had something to do with how I was far too old to not have a husband yet, and the son and I just rolled our eyes at each other as his mom tried to barter with my parents for me.
This year’s offer was twenty six goats and nine chickens. My sister looked up how much goats are worth, and was mad our parents didn’t sell me so she could have sold the goats and gotten $2000-$8000 for them. My dad says they’re waiting out on an offer of a camel. My brother thinks they should have it more than once a year so he can get more apple cider.
Now I’m back at uni, and in my first psych class of the semester the guy sitting beside me looked really familiar.
As in his-mom-tries-to-buy-me-with-goats-every-Christmas familiar.
That kind of familiar.
We introduced ourselves before class started and I sat there for a couple minutes readying to make a total fool of myself in case I was wrong before turning to him again.
“This is going to sound really weird if you aren’t who I think you are, but by any chance does your mom try to buy you a wife with goats every Christmas?”
His friend gives me a weird look as he walks past me to sit on the other side of him, but he’s definitely putting the pieces together.
“That’s you? Bethlehem in [city name], right? God, my mom is so mortifying.”
And we both kinda laugh and meanwhile his friend is giving us both weird looks now because apparently he didn’t know that his friend’s mom was trying to buy him a wife using livestock.
So he turns to his friend and is like
“Oh, I forgot to introduce you. Danny, this is my fiancée, Kee.”
And I kinda rolled my eyes and was like
“I’m not actually your fiancée. Your mom hasn’t offered my parents enough goats yet. But apparently my dad will sell me for a camel.”
And he laughed and shook his head like
“I am not telling my mom that. I don’t want to see what she has planned for if your parents ever accept.”
So yeah. His friend was really confused by that point and we explained it to him and it turns out he’s pretty cool and we’re Facebook friends now and hang out in psych classes. Apparently his mom only ever tries to buy me for him and she and my mom had gone to the same church growing up which is why she can always pick us out.
So yeah. That’s the story of how some lady tries to use goats to buy me to be her ridiculously attractive son’s wife every Christmas, and how he’s in my class and we’re friends now.
It was the 23rd of December, 2017, and my sister had convinced her friend to come with us this year.
“And that’s where Kee’s fiancé usually is,” Sam explained as we stood in the line waiting to get inside. Her friend gave her the same sceptical look she’d apparently been giving since Sam had first told her.
“He’s not my fiancé,” I pointed out, trying to rub some feeling back into my hands. The Goat Guy had been texting me updates since that morning. The organizers had discussed it at length, but apparently temperatures of negative eighteen, thirteen inches of snow, and a blizzard warning weren’t quite enough to have Bethlehem cancelled (or for my parents to decide to skip it this year). Hashtag Canada.
The line was long this year, and we’d already been standing out in the cold for the better part of half an hour. My brother was loudly lamenting the fact that we couldn’t get to the hot apple cider until we’d made it inside.
My phone buzzed in my pocket, and I braved taking off a glove to check it.
“Who do you keep texting?” my mom asked, not-so-subtly trying to peer over my shoulder at my phone.
“Gregory from psychology,” I told her, sending off a text informing him that we were still in line. It wasn’t technically a lie, since, you know, that was his actual name and he was in my psychology classes. It wasn’t my fault that my family only knew him as the Goat Guy.
“Ooo,” Sam teased, elbowing me in the ribs, her bony elbows hurting less than usual through all our layers. “I’m going to tell your fiancé he has competition, and then maybe they’ll offer us something useful. Like a car or a trip to Hawaii or something.”
I snorted again. “One, he’s still not my fiancé. Two, he doesn’t have competition, because I’m not interested in him or in Gregory. And, three, this isn’t a game show. If anything, his mom will just offer maybe a horse or something.”
“Can I have the horse?”
I rolled my eyes, glancing at my phone as another text came in. Hurry up. “Sure, Cole.”
My brother pumped his fist in the air. “Nice.”
It took another ten minutes or so to make it to the front of the line, and my family had placed their bets on the amount of farm animals that would be offered this year. My dad reminded me that he was selling me if they offered a camel, and I rolled my eyes, trying to act as reluctant to get to that part of the night as I usually was. Apparently I didn’t do as good a job as I thought I did, since Mom questioned me.
I shrugged, feeling my phone go off again. “I guess I’ve just decided to go with it.”
Sam rolled her eyes. “She thinks he’s hot,” she told her friend. Which, well, it wasn’t exactly untrue. Objectively the Goat Guy was ridiculously attractive, but that doesn’t mean I want to (or have time to) date him.
We’d reached the entrance by that point, and were given our little pouches of pennies to buy small trinkets and ducked into the (compared to outside, at least) warmth of Bethlehem.
Roman soldiers milled amongst the people, asking for taxes and wanting to see our papers. We didn’t have papers, obviously, but the soldier who checked us took an extra penny as a bribe.
“Wait,” Sam’s friend said, stopping in her tracks. “There’s a petting zoo?”
There was, in fact, a petting zoo. The petting zoo and the apple cider were there to keep us pacified as we waited for the soldiers to allow us entrance into Bethlehem, and Cole and our parents went off to get us something to drink while I followed Sam and her friend to see the animals.
“What is this?” Sam asked, frowning. “Where are all the animals?”
There were significantly less animals than usual. Two whole pens were empty, and I could see a few soldiers and townspeople whispering to each other in a panic.
“Maybe they were too cold,” I suggested, reaching out to pat a pig’s head. It snorted and turned away.
My parents and brother returned with our drinks, and I sighed into the bliss that is Bethlehem hot apple cider, and, by the time we made it to the gates to listen as the soldiers reminded us of laws that I don’t remember, I actually had a bit of feeling back in my fingers and face.
I pulled off a glove, typing up a quick text. We’re in.
The stalls were as neat as they always were. I bought a wooden hammer to add to my collection for a couple pennies. My mom dug out her wallet to buy a carved wooden bowl. Sam and her friend took selfies with a girl from their soccer team who was working in a bakery and she snuck them a free scone. Cole found another apple cider vendor and took three cups for himself.
“Look,” Sam said, grinning wickedly as she wrapped an arm around my shoulders. “There it is.”
And there it was. The Goat Guy’s mom was standing outside her shop, heckling with a couple over the price of a rug.
“That is a poncho,” I agreed, glancing at one hanging on the side of the shop and deciding I was going to buy it after this whole thing was over.
Sam rolled her eyes. “You know that’s not what I mean,” she pointed out, craning her neck. “I don’t see your fiancé, though.”
“That’s because I don’t have one,” I pointed out, stopping to look at the smithery so I didn’t look too eager to get there.
No one bought that I actually wanted to see some guy pound metal with a hammer (there wasn’t an actual fire or anything, so he was really just sitting there hitting it), so they dragged me across the hall, grins on their faces.
The Goat Guy’s mom, who we will henceforth refer to as the Goat Mom for sake of ease, perked up as she saw us heading towards them, finishing up her bartering and holding her arms out in greeting.
“Ah,” she called, grinning at us. “Back again, I see. Surely you must have found a suitable husband for your daughter by now.”
“Nope,” my mom said, giving me a pointed look. “She’s still single.”
(And, yeah, I was, and still am, but she doesn’t have to be so judgy about it)
The Goat Mom gasped, pressing a hand to her chest. “My dear, you’re far too old to be without a husband,” she cried, causing people to stop to watch. I could feel my face heating up, and glanced around wondering where the Goat Guy was at. We had agreed months ago that this was always far more embarrassing for me than it was for him, so why was he taking so long?
“You won’t be young forever,” the Goat Mom was continuing, grabbing my hands and forcing my to look at her. “You’re running out of time.” She glanced past me to my parents, a smug look on her face that said she got just as much enjoyment out of this as my family did. “My son is still in need of a wife. I’ll tell you what, I will give you thirty goats and ten chickens for your daughter. She—”
“Aww, Mom. You started negotiations without me? How are they supposed to know I’d be the perfect husband for Kee if they can’t see how hot I am?”
The Goat Mom froze for a moment, her grip on my hands loosening enough for me to pull away. I followed the shocked gazes of my family and his mom to the Goat Guy.
He was leaning casually against the shop, somehow managing to look good in clothes that were 2000 years out of fashion, a smirk on his face and a half dozen goats and a llama surrounding him.
“That’s Kee’s fiancé,” Sam whispered to her friend, as if there was any doubt about his identity.
His mom blinked out of her shock, narrowing her eyes at him. “Are you drunk?”
The Goat Guy looked offended, raising a hand to his chest. “What? No!”
Cole started cackling. I don’t think he had any more idea what was going on than the rest of them, but fifteen year old boys are weird.
His mom glanced back at us for a moment, and I had to look away to keep the grin off my face, and noticed quite the crowd had gathered.
She took a deep breath as she turned back to her son, pressing her fingers to her temples. “Then why do you have goats?”
I couldn’t keep myself from snorting then, but, thankfully, everyone seemed too distracted to notice.
The Goat Guy rolled his eyes, relaxing back against the shop once more. “I mean, you’ve been failing at bartering me a wife for eight years, Mom,” he pointed out. “I think they just don’t believe we really have as many goats as you say we have. So I brought goats!” He waved the ropes in his hands, and sent me a wink. “And a llama! Girls like llamas.”
“I think that’s actually an alpaca,” my brother helpfully pointed out, and the Goat Guy grinned.
“You’re probably right, my man,” he agreed and turned back to me. “I’m adding this alpaca onto the list of whatever my mom’s already offered. We can ride off on it into the sunset. What do you say?”
“I say it probably wouldn’t hold us.” I was grinning now, too, no longer able to hold it in.
The Goat Guy just shrugged and stayed silent, letting our families stew for a moment.
“Are you sure you aren’t drunk?” his mom finally asked, glancing between us in confusion. “Maybe you’ve been spending a little too much time at the, uh, tavern.” She glanced at the goats and the llama (alpaca?), realization dawning on her face. “Gregory, you had better not be the reason everyone is panicking about the animals going missing from the petting—trading post.”
“Not drunk,” he insisted, ignoring the part about him stealing the animals from the petting zoo as he thrust the leads of the animals into her hands before she had a chance to protest. “I’m just excited to see my future wife.” He crossed the distance between us, my family stepping back, still mostly in shock, and wrapped me up in his arms. “How’s it going, Kee?”
I laughed, hugging him back quickly before pulling away. “Hey, Gregory,” I echoed loudly, my grin growing at the gasp that came from someone in my family. “How’d you find the psych final?”
He groaned, burying his face in my neck. “Ugh, don’t even get me started,” he whined, an arm wrapping back around my shoulders. “I didn’t fail, but that’s about all I can say.”
I hummed in sympathy, watching our families try to piece together what was going on and the crowd that was wondering if this was supposed to be happening. His mom’s mouth was opening to say something as I caught sight of a couple of soldiers pushing through the crowd, and nudged him.
“You!” one yelled, and the Goat Guy’s head snapped of my shoulder, staring at the soldier in shock. “He stole the king’s animals!” One of the others came forward, pulling him away from me.
“You, uh, have the right to remain silent,” he started, fixing his grip on the Goat Guy’s arm. The soldier who grabbed his other arm rolled his eyes.
“He doesn’t have any rights.”
“Oh, right.” The second soldier nodded and turned back to the Goat Guy. “You don’t have the right to remain silent,” he amended.
“Take him to the king,” the first soldier ordered, taking the leads from the Goat Mom. “He should be tried at once.”
The Goat Guy regained his wits and started to struggle against their hold.
“Wait for me, Kee!” he cried as they dragged him back through the parted crowd. “I’ll come back for you!”
By the time he’d disappeared and the crowd had filled in their path, I was laughing so hard I could barely breathe. It’d gone better than either of us could’ve hoped.
I calmed down after a moment, and the Goat Mom was still staring in confusion in the direction her son had disappeared in. I stepped past her to the shop, pulling the poncho I’d noticed earlier off the wall.
“I’d like to buy this, please,” I said, and her eyes snapped back to me. I grinned and handed her the money, and she pocketed it without bartering, and I walked away, the crowd parting for me as I wandered towards the next stall.
My family joined me a few moments later, as I was browsing some blown glass ornaments and ignoring the fact that the shopkeepers were whispering about me.
“What was that?” my mom demanded.
I shrugged. “That was her bartering for me to marry the Goat Guy like every year.”
“Yeah, that was not like every year.” Sam snorted and I could practically hear her rolling her eyes. “Since when do you know the Goat Guy?”
“Since January?” I tried to look confused, but I’m pretty sure I was still grinning. “You knew that.”
“No?”
“Yeah?” I countered. “Gregory from psychology?”
The stared at me for a long moment before any of them spoke. Sam’s friend was the only one who seemed more entertained than confused.
“That was Gregory from psychology?” my mom asked, and I shrugged, grinning wider. “You planned this, didn’t you? That’s why you kept texting him outside?”
I shrugged. “I mean, we didn’t plan him getting arrested,” I admitted. “But, yeah, we planned the rest.”
“How’d he steal the goats and the alpaca?” Cole wondered.
“He knows a guy.”
“Like that’s what’s important here.” Sam rolled her eyes.
“Why?” my dad asked, and I shrugged again.
“Seven years’ worth of revenge.”
“That’s not what’s important either,” Sam interjected, huffing loudly. “Kee’s totally dating the Goat Guy. I called it.”
“We’re not dating.” I rolled my eyes, pushing past them to continue through Bethlehem. There should’ve been another apple cider vendor coming up soon, and I’d lost all the heat from the last one.
My family did not drop it through the rest of Bethlehem, and neither did any of the vendors who, apparently, knew exactly who I was (my toque was kind of distinctive, so I guess I’ll give them that) and let me know how sorry they were to hear that my man had been locked up just for trying to provide for his family.
We also saw the Goat Guy again, who had been locked up with the prisoners in a large cage, guarded by a handful of soldiers.
He grinned as he saw us approaching, calling out for me and sticking his arms through the bars.
“Can I borrow your notes later?” he asked. “I’m in here for nineteen years, so I’ll be missing a bit of class.”
Sam and her friend posed for selfies with him, and then she made me pose for one with him that will definitely be used for blackmail at a later date.
And that was Bethlehem. No one shut up on the entire drive home, or for the rest of Christmas break, for that matter, about the fact that I’d been keeping my knowing the Goat Guy a secret for almost a year—which I hadn’t, as I pointed out multiple times. They all knew about Gregory from psychology, and he was literally in my phone as The Goat Guy. It wasn’t my fault they hadn’t put the pieces together.
My family is convinced the Goat Guy and I are meant to be and still not entirely convinced that we aren’t currently dating, and I’m kind of dreading what that might mean for Bethlehem 2k18. Honestly, I’d rather not have to deal with the fallout of my parents actually giving in and getting me a bartered husband, no matter how hot he might be. But I feel like they’re going to accept one year, especially after what we did this year.
The Goat Guy says his mom isn’t any better, and is already planning for next year but won’t let him know anything. Maybe I can convince my parents that I never have to go back ever again.
Two weeks later, I caught the Goat Guy’s eye from across the psychology lecture hall, waving him over.
“Hey,” I said, grinning at him as he slipped into the seat beside me. I turned to my friends. “Guys, this is Gregory the Goat Guy.”
“Her fiancé,” he added, and I snorted at my friends’ incredulous looks and punched him gently in the shoulder.
“Not my fiancé,” I corrected, and turned back to him. “The llama was impressive, but you know my dad’s expecting a camel.”
“Darn,” he said, laughing. “I could have sworn you said llama. I guess I’ll have to find a camel by next year if we ever want to get engaged.” He paused, raising an eyebrow. “But you know, I did get arrested before your parents had a chance to decline the offer this time. Maybe they were going to say yes to the llama.”
“Wait,” my friend said, leaning around me to give the Goat Guy a once over. “That story was real? The Goat Guy actually exists?”
I will be here and I will be waiting for the next bit of this story come December
someone: it’s okay! you tried your best!!
me, with no idea of what my best even looks like anymore:
Be hard on yourself. Never be satisfied. Stop wasting time. Stop letting your textbooks collect dust. Get angry about the fact that you can’t make friends if you don’t start learning the language. Be embarrassed by the fact that you always need a translator. Stop letting pinyin be your crutch—read and write and type characters instead. Don’t let anyone tell you that you’ll only ever be able to speak with an accent. Refuse the English menu at the restaurant. Fight to be the fastest learner out of anyone you know. Stop cheating with Google translate and painfully translate word-by-word instead. Tell yourself that you don’t have enough vocabulary, that your tones are rubbish, that your grammar is flawed.
Go easy on yourself. Be confident. Accept compliments. Take a break from all those grammar books, and laugh or cry at a foreign film instead. Know that it’s ok to make mistakes or talk with an accent. Keep a small book full of words and phrases you’re learning. Translate songs. Classify eating out or ordering milk tea as “homework”. Talk to strangers. Rig your laptop and phone with translation tools of every sort. Google the slang. Lurk people on facebook and translate everything they post until you know everything there is to know about their life conversational Chinese. Be proud of your accomplishments.
Still true!
You’re unstoppable
Go study for your finals. Write that paper and finish that presentation. Study those flash cards. Stop procrastinating, have more trust in you and get off your phone.
Mandarin Resources
Chinese Boost grammar: This page has a list of different levels of Mandarin grammar for you to explore. What you do is choose your level and then pick a grammar pattern from the articles under that level. Each article is clearly written and gives multiple examples to help you understand what you’re learning.
a folder of many many mandarin resources
Just Learn Chinese: This website has so many things. There’s vocab/idiom explanations, grammar, and best of all stories/novels. The stories are divided into different levels of difficulty and, when reading the actual stories, have a popup dictionary when you hover over a word. The website is run by a native Mandarin speaker.
Carl Gene: Carl Gene is a professional translator and this is his blog. I’d say the stuff he posts is a little more advanced but it’s certainly worth looking around. He posts about Chinese language and history, as well as his experience working as a translator and interpreter. Really interesting stuff.
中外对话 China Dialogue: China Dialogue is a website dedicated to stories about China’s environmental issues and the articles can be read in either Mandarin or English. This is a much more advanced reading source and it is not divided into levels of difficulty.
The Chairman’s Bao: This is an online newspaper that has stories for each HSK level. When you go to an article, you can highlight words you don’t understand and the definition will appear to the right of the text. There’s a wide range of topics covered in their articles so you’re bound to find something you like.
Read 漫画 Manhua Online: All of the manhua are written by native speakers (at least i think they are) and they’re free to read. The whole website is in Mandarin so it might that a little bit of legwork to figure out how to find what you want. I just leaf through the manhua that are at the top of the page.
Read Chinese: This website offers a huge number of texts for beginner, intermediate, and advanced learners in both traditional and simplified characters. After reading each passage there are a few questions you answer to test your comprehension of what you just read. Each passage also has pinyin, but rather than putting it with the characters it is put underneath the passage so you are forced to focus just on the characters while reading.
Hanzi Grids: Here you can make your own printable grids for practicing hanzi. To get started you just have to quickly make a free account on the website using your email. After doing so you can start working on your grid. There are some features that you have to pay for but you can still make a basic grid without the subscription.
Easy Mandarin Books to Read: This is just a short list of suggestions for simple books to read in Mandarin. Most of them are children’s books or books of tales.
Mandarin Weekly: Mandarin Weekly is a weekly newsletter that includes loads of resources for Mandarin for all levels. The weekly emails include resources for vocab, grammar, culture, and much more. 10/10 would recommend subscribing especially since it’s free.
Ninchanese: This is a fun little website full of games and an entertaining story to help you learn basic Mandarin. There’s also an app for it so you can play both on your phone and on your computer.
Phonetic Sets of Characters: As the name suggests, this is a list of characters that have similar pronunciations. In this list they cover characters that have the same pronunciation for everything including tones and characters that have the same initials and finals but different tones. There are two other categories of similarity, but this list only covers the two.
BONUS:
The Grass Mud Horse Lexicon: This is a special gift for you all. I suggest you explore it and have fun.
How I study languages
Hello, everyone! I had a long weekend full of friends and food, and of course a bit of studying! I was in a group voice chat practicing Korean when the topic of learning multiple languages came up. Someone in the chat asked me a question I field a lot but that I have not addressed on here. That question is,
“How do you study languages?”
Keeping in mind that this is just what works for me and that every learns in different ways, today I want to tell you guys what has worked for me in my language-learning journey(s).
Keep reading
