immobilized by the damn Ferengi

Abbey. 28. Mormon. Southern. Actress. Fangirl.

[azirafuck]

I’m really sad we lost the fireman’s monologue in the series

because not only is it fucking hilarious, it’s also the whole point of the story: appearances can be very deceptive

[fetchmeoutthatdoodledoo]

[cogentranting]

In Infinity War, when the army in Wakanda is charging forward to meet Thanos’s army, you see Steve and T’challa fly past everyone because they both run super fast. But Bucky is just as fast. And Bucky was not with them. Bucky looked at the army of weird alien monsters and thought to himself “I’m not in any hurry to get to that. I’ll jog it.”

[sonneillonv-deactivated20220218]

Bucky, watching Steve and T’challa sprint headlong toward a possibly deadly fight: My god, now there’s two of them.

[ryanbergara2]

ryan bergara gets paid to do shit such as screeching like mothman in the middle of the woods and hunting for ghosts half drunk in a london pub and then dressing up as indiana fucking jones to look for hidden treasure all with his best friend at his side and if that’s not the definition of ‘living your best life’ i don’t know what is

[fetchmeoutthatdoodledoo]

this afternoon my 2 year old niece went around with her hands in the pockets of her little jumpsuit exclaiming I HAVE POCKETS

im like yeah enjoy that while it lasts because it definitely wont and the excitement never goes away

[fetchmeoutthatdoodledoo]

getting real tired of hurting so much

[fetchmeoutthatdoodledoo]

one thing men need to know about women

(in general, i assume “not all men are like this!” but idk, maybe they are)

we don’t need you to fix our problems

we just need you to acknowledge our problems

and don’t, for the love of all that is holy, interrupt us as we’re telling you about our problems to tell us how to fix it

[fetchmeoutthatdoodledoo]

i miss mcdonalds

[amusementforme]

[lizziesupremacy]

THE LAST DAY GUYS

[darkmuse112-og]

Every April 30th, like clockwork.

At least I know that the people of tumblr will never let me down.

[fetchmeoutthatdoodledoo]

so on friday i found out that i have celiac disease and today i had to give away the rest of my easter candy because it all contains wheat

[fetchmeoutthatdoodledoo]

trying to convince my husband to get a tiny dog

i love him and everything but yall if you dont get married you dont have to ask anyone for permission to get all the tiny dogs you want

[fetchmeoutthatdoodledoo]

YALL HE SAID YES WERE GETTING A TINY DOG

[fetchmeoutthatdoodledoo]

Introducing Worf, our new Chief of Security.

[princesconsuela]

[fetchmeoutthatdoodledoo]

trying to convince my husband to get a tiny dog

i love him and everything but yall if you dont get married you dont have to ask anyone for permission to get all the tiny dogs you want

[fetchmeoutthatdoodledoo]

YALL HE SAID YES WERE GETTING A TINY DOG

[fetchmeoutthatdoodledoo]

trying to convince my husband to get a tiny dog

i love him and everything but yall if you dont get married you dont have to ask anyone for permission to get all the tiny dogs you want

[fetchmeoutthatdoodledoo]

trying to get pregnant is seriously the worst

[fetchmeoutthatdoodledoo]

dont really want to be in this upcoming community theatre show but still kinda bothered that i havent been offered a part

[fire-is-her-water]

My doggo, Ezri, who rarely barks and mostly borks.

When I got her, she’d been abused and would cower and pee at almost everything, and had been mistreated when she’d barked, so she never would. One day months after I had her she got excited on a walk and borked at a bird, and then immediately cower-peed. I had to re-teach her to bark by gathering her whole human pack and having everyone bark and howl and feed her treats and pet her till she got excited enough to join in, and then got more treats. Took a while but I was able to teach her to bork on command (and she’s gotta be excited or she just stares at me like “Sorry, the bork system needs charging”) and she’ll do it happily when she’s excited to go for a walk or upon seeing a friend, and at birds. I love her croaky borking, especially when she started off terrified of making a joyful noise.

[merak-zoran]

[corvigae]

What kind of dog is Ezri? I love her!!

[fire-is-her-water]

I… did not expect this post to blow up this much but I am delighted at all the tags and replies and Ezri has been told the internet thinks she’s a Very Good Dog. :D

She’s a German spitz - in the same family as keeshonds and pomeranians. She might be crossed with something else as her freckled coat, non-pointy nose, and personality are not standard for her breed (they’re usually a lot more high energy and excitable - she’s super laid back and chill). She’s a bit less fluffy than breed-standard too, mostly because she’s grown out from her spring/summer trim (not usually necessary/good for her type of coat but she gets terribly itchy otherwise). It also makes her look like a puppy of a large breed:

Ezri’s best friend is Murder Cat, who is a gentle friend to humans and Ezri, but does things to mice that would make Hannibal Lecter go “Isn’t that a bit much?”

I got Murder Cat as a kitten, and she used to try to nurse on everything when she was small. Eventually, she settled on her favourite thing to nurse on, Ezri, who has never had puppies and a little confused at first but eventually went with it. She grew out of it, but they have stayed snuggly buddies ever since.

New Years here is full of fireworks outside and Ezri gets Vry Scared. I usually set her up somewhere with a snuggly spot right by me, and Murder Cat comes and does this all night: 

She goes everywhere with me in my bakfiets (cargo bike) and lets me warm my hands in her fur on cold days.

And her ears disappear if I say her name to get her attention.

ok so great thanks for coming to my TED talk about my dog, good night, drive safe

[xtremecaffeine-deactivated20181]

*Dries eye* I’m sorry I just love her so much