UwU *seizes your means of production* what's this

[karvina]

the xbox is a Machine. the playstation is a Device. the switch is a Toy. the personal computer is also a Machine. what the world needs, is a way to play video games on a Contraption

[freezedriedrose]

you fool. that's pinball

[tostadora]

The time I publicly destroyed un bigot at Starbucks

This might sound fake but I assure you, my life is stranger than fiction

Moi, minding my own affaires: I’ll have une baguette s’il vous plait

Some guy: *under his breath* A baguette? Get a life... they don’t even sell that here

Barista: Actually, oui, we do sell baguettes, does that bother you?

Some guy: *rolls eyes* imagine actually eating that

Moi: I don’t have to imagine *grabs my warm baguette and takes a good sassy chomp*

The guy: *notices my Eiffel Tower pin* Oh so you’re a Frenchgot? So you just don’t win wars? That figures

Moi: Oui, I’m a proud “Frenchgot” and that has nothing to do with my preferences in sustenance

Femme behind moi: Did you seriously just call that person a Frenchgot? What kind of monde are we living in?

Moi: Oui, I’m used to it though.. that’s what you get for being openly French it seems!

The guy: I’m literally a gay man and I won’t let you French freaks shame me for having gay s*x, people like you are hurting my community. I’m gonna go have S*X with my boyfriend

Moi: Uhhhhh mon ami you were the one shaming me for buying a warm baguette and now you’re shoving the image of s*x down a sex repulsed French’s throat... Non a good look. Et oui, je suis a proud French freak!

Femme: I’ve been an out French femme since the 4-20s et let me tell you, monsieur Gay, we have done nothing but further acceptance for your community et carry your community on our backs

Moi: You have the nerve to talk down to a French ancien? Vraiment?

Barista: *throws l’eau on the bigoted guy*

Barista: Well... I might lose my job for this, but at least I can say it was worth it.

Moi: *picks up ma warm baguette et hits him on la tête*

Bigot: I HATE FRENCH PEOPLE AND FRANCE. YOU ARE NOT EVEN HUMAN.

Moi: *loudly and proudly* une autre baguette, s’il vous plait, par la maison! I think I’m owed it

Barista: You know it!

Bigot: *storms out crying*

[gsirvitor]

[byjove]

I can’t breathe I’m laughing so hard

[3000s]

[thriron]

[onion-souls]

What's up with this "trailer starts now" sizzle reel thing they're adding to movie trailers? They're putting trailers in front of trailers for the trailer

[onion-souls]

Also, this seems like a rookie mistake, but there are so many ads that don't explain or even name what they are selling before the ad skip button activates on most media players/TV system. Why are marketers not adapting to this

[depsidase]

[tlirsgender]

Rewatched x-men (2000) and can I just say magneto's plan (turning all those politicians into mutants) was objectively hilarious. Like can you imagine. Somebody's firing the transgenderization beam into congress

[prokopetz]

"Isn't it weird that [thing humans commonly eat] is poisonous to literally every domesticated animal" I mean, there's a pretty good chance that [thing humans commonly eat] is at least mildly poisonous to humans, too. One of our quirks as a species is that we think our food is bland if it doesn't have enough poison in it.

[xeansicemane]

Humans have a really weird mix of mundane superpowers.

We're not fast and don't have a lot of natural weaponry but we're bizarrely tolerant to a broad range of toxins to the point that one toxin is considered a morning necessity for some to perform at work. Gotta love us.

[vexwerewolf]

[missmacfire]

[tiixij]

discourse from the year 2043: getting a song stuck in your head is immoral because it takes money away from the artists that would get paid if you were actually listening to it

[prokopetz]

The thing about Lovecraft's work is that he did write about some genuinely fucked up critters, but he doesn't seem to have had a clear picture of which ones those are. "Dog that inhabits right angles" and "sapient colour" are treated as exactly as mind-bending as, like, "guy who looks like a fish" and "big penguin".

[segamascott]

[crtter]

I mean, Josef Mеngеlе DID die here. Like, that’s something that happened. You know, the piece of shit Nаzі ““doctor”” who experimented on people? His bones are here. We’re using him as a practice skeleton for forensic medicine students at the University of São Paulo. I’m 100% serious.

[crtter]

For the record! We’re not fucking around with his bones just because. Technically, they should be given to his living relatives, but they really, REALLY don’t want him. Like, we’ve been asking them if we can mail him to them ever since he was identified in the 90s, and every time they’re like “hell no, fuck that guy” which is understandable but now we’re at this standstill in case a family member eventually does want him back, and we’re absolutely NOT burying a nаzі all nice and cozy in our soil if we can help it. So I guess it was decided that the best course of action was to fuck around with his bones. In the name of education.

[loth-caatgirl]

[redstonedust]

welcome to my epic fantasy world. we have many developed fantasy kingdoms with 2000 years of rich lore and history. and to the south you can see the evil sand people and to the east theres japanchina.

[gorps]

This is so fucked

[roxyco-deliverygirl]

This is how we can keep silksong delayed! Demand the Wii u version!

[sleepyjump]

"men dni" but in a no true scotsman sense. men don't interact. so if you're here,

[monster2001]