Leaves like broken shards of stained glass windows

she/her / ace / I_bite_my_thumb_at_thee on AO3/ 24/ fic writer apparently /occasionally i do embroidery or make wood carvings/ the books in the header were bound by @dhwty-writes

[flowercrown-bard]

My Writing Masterpost

Geralt/Jaskier:

Choose-your-own-adventure:

I wish I’d done things different, oh, I wish I’d made it right

AO3

During the dragon hunt, Destiny grants Geralt a chance to fix things with Jaskier and the reader gets to help Geralt prevent the break-up or apologize to Jaskier afterwards. Featurung for example amnesia, drunk meetings, curses and dragons (happy, neutral and bad endings, MCD in some of these endings, story length between 7k and 16k)

I Follow the Path You Choose

AO3

Geralt and Jaskier spend the winter together, either at Kaer Morhen or Oxenfurt. Featuring for example curses, jealousy, fluff (only happy endings, story length between 7k and 17k)

One Shots:

Don’t leave me hanging

AO3 / tumblr

Geralt hands Jaskier over to a baron who had set a reward for the bard. Geralt is not prepared to find out that the baron will have Jaskier hanged. (1.7k)

As Though They Were Nightingales

AO3  / tumblr

Jaskier is an old man and Geralt has to come to terms with Jaskier's fading memory (~2k)

Hold me close, don't ask for more    

AO3 / tumblr

Geralt and Jaskier are cudding and Geralt is afraid he will disappoint Jaskier, because he doesn't want to have sex. (written for ace week) (1.7k)

If only you meant it    

AO3  / tumblr

Jaskier keeps telling Geralt that he loves him. And Geralt -like the idiot that he is- keeps thinking that Jaskier is only joking. (~3k)

How to touch a man's muscles without looking gay

AO3  / tumblr

Jaskier comes up with a lot of (stupid) excuses to touch Geralt’s muscles without looking like he wants to touch Geralt’s muscles. (3k)

Colours in the Night

AO3  / tumblr

Geralt wants to show Jaskier the Northern lights during his fist winter at Kaer Morhen. Surprisingly, Lambert is helpful (1k)

Snowflakes on Eyelashes   

AO3 / tumblr

Winter in Oxenfurt sucks. It's all grey skies and muddy rain and cold. The only thing making it enjoyable this year is that Geralt is there with Jaskier. Oh, and that for some unknown reason it is snowing, something that hadn't happened in years. (1.7k)

A Roach by Any Other Name

AO3  / tumblr

Jaskier finds out that all of Geralt's horses are called Roach (2k)

Santa Claus is coming to town

AO3  / tumblr

(previously titled “hohoho” which was just the worst name ever lmao) Geralt really doesn’t want to play Santa for the primary school, unlike Jaskier, who may or may not be a bit pissed that this handsome stranger got the part. There is only one possible solution: They have to meet again to discuss Geralt's audacity. (2k)

Love that Loathsome Laugh

AO3  / tumblr

Geralt is ashamed of his laugh and tries his best to hide it from Jaskier. After all, how could the man with the pretty laugh not be disgusted by Geralt's hideous one? (1.4k)

Roses and Cornflowers    

AO3  / tumblr

Geralt has a secret admirer who gives him flowers. The problem is that Geralt is a florist and mildly pissed off that his secret admirer suports his competitor (3k)

Of Beards and Bards

AO3 / tumblr

Geralt trusts Jaskier to shave his beard. This is a mistake (1.4k)

To Keep Jaskier (Away)

AO3 / tumblr  / podfic

Geralt realises that spring has become his favourite season because he gets to reunite with Jaskier (883 words)

Cracked Marble

AO3  / tumblr

Jaskier sees Geralt with black eyes (1.5k)

Never Again

AO3 / tumblr

Geralt taking care of Jaskier when they get caught in a snowstorm on their way to Kaer Morhen (2k)

I meant to do that. Obviously.

AO3  / tumblr

The first time Geralt gets swallowed by a selkimore is an accident but he won’t admit that (1k)

The stars above the Path

AO3 / tumblr

Geralt takes Jaskier stargazing (>1k)

Hooked on a Feeling

AO3 / tumblr

Geralt and Jaskier move into a new place together (1k)

Flora and - yikes! - Fauna

AO3 / tumblr

Jaskier makes flower crowns, not realising that the flowers would attract bugs (3k)

Anything you can do, I can do better

AO3 / tumblr

Geralt and Jaskier challenge each other to prove that they can do everything the other can do, which leads to increasingly intimate situations (no smut tho) (5k)

The Colour of Cornflowers

AO3 / tumblr

A soulmate AU, in which Geralt’s mutations make it impossible for him to see colour, even after he met his soulmate (3k)

(Before) it’s too late

AO3 / tumblr

Jaskier wakes up tied back to back with Geralt. There is no hope of escape and they’re running out of time before the one who put them there will come back. (presumed mcd, blood, injury, 7k)

Oh, what’s in a name?

AO3 / tumblr

Geralt accidentally calls Jaskier by the wrong name - Roach - and Jaskier finds out that actually that’s a compliment. (3k)

Singing in the rain

AO3 / tumblr

Modern AU: Geralt wouldn't have gotten caught in the rain if it weren't for that busker with the annoyingly beautiful smile. And to make things worse, Geralt and the busker are now seeking shelter from the rain under the same umbrella. (2.5k)

He didn’t say it out loud

AO3 / tumblr

Jaskier helps Geralt come down from his potions (1k)

I’m lost (I’m found) in you

AO3 / tumblr

Ciri gets lost in Fae!Jaskier’s woods and Geralt follows to save her (5k)

Talk to me, Geralt

AO3 / tumblr

After an unfortunate encounter with a mage, Geralt refuses to speak with Jaskier. Not a single word or even grunt leaves his lips. Of course, Jaskier takes that in the worst way possible  (3k)

To the place up on our hill

AO3 / tumblr

Geralt meets up with Jaskier, bringing him flowers, as he does every year on their anniversary. (MCD, 1k)

Congealed

AO3 / tumblr

Jaskier, heartbroken about his unrequited love for Geralt, asks a fae for help. The fae gives him the opposite of what he wanted. (1.6k)

You must have some review for me

AO3 /tumblr

Jaskier keeps asking Geralt for three-word reviews. He's not very happy with the results. Until he is. (3.6k)

Three Little Words

AO3 / tumblr  

Geralt can’t say ‘I love you’, so he finds other three-word-sentences to mean the same thing (1k)

Three Words or Less

AO3 /tumblr

after being teased for falling in love quickly - sometimes after exchanging less than three words with someone - Jaskier embraces how easily he can give his heart away. (>1k)

The kindest cruelty

tumblr

Jaskier’s captors try to break his mind by making him believe over and over again that Geralt has come to save him (1.5k)

Getting used to you

tumblr

Jaskier hates the sound of Geralt sharpening his swords until one day he doesn’t anymore

You’ve no clue how to sew

AO3 / tumblr

Geralt teaches Jaskier embroidery

Ghost at Oxenfurt

tumblr

Geralt takes a contract on a ghost that’s haunting the Oxenfurt Academy

Mine

tumblr

Fae!Jaskier is protecting his witcher from a Leshy

How to protect your witcher

tumblr

Geralt reflects on the ways in which Jaskier protects him

The Moonlit Dancer

tumblr

Every child of Oakwood Valley knows the tale of the Moonlit Dancer, who is still searching for his dance partner

Wishing upon Dandelions

tumblr

the greater the wish, the more Dandelions are needed. And Jaskier has a pretty big wish to make

The horses of Kaer Morhen

tumblr

As a child, Geralt runs away from Kaer Morhen with his horse and meets a boy who has also run away from home

Series of one shots:

untitled Rooster!Jaskier series (Jaskier&Geralt)

Valdo curses Jaskier into a rooster. Chaos and terrible puns ensue

How Valdo Marx cocks up a curse and Jaskier doesn't chicken out of taking his revenge / tumblr  (2k)

He That Would Have Eggs Must Endure The Cackling Of Hens  / tumblr (2.6k)

Started out rocky, but now they're both cocky / tumblr (3k)

How hard can it be? (Geralt/Jaskier)

 To Geralt’s dismay, Jaskier adopts a baby griffin. Like how hard it can be being a mother of a cute but deadly baby?

Nothing More Charming / tumblr (1.8k)

Daisies, daisies, perched upon your forehead /tumblr (1.8k)

Would things be easier? / tumblr (2k)

Someone to come back to / tumblr (2k)

I made new friends

tumblr

Jaskier comes up with names for his new mouse-friends 

Autumn leaves

tumblr

Geralt likes to catch leaves as they fall from the trees

Multi-chapter fics:

The Song of the White Wolf (will always be sung alone) 

AO3

After the mountain Jaskier stumbles across a white wolf that acts suspiciously human-like (35k)

Always Lose-Lose

AO3

A story of how Geralt and Jaskier fell in love and Jaskier got kidnapped by Nilfgaard (125k)

The Boy Who Ran

AO3 / tumblr: part 1 / part 2 / part 3 / part 4 / part 5 / part 6

Jaskier is somewhat Fae-ish and Geralt doesn’t know (24k)

Sour Stench and Sunshine Scent

AO3 / tumblr: part 1 / part 2

Geralt keeps a journal about the different things he smells. He can’t understand what Jaskier smells like when he looks at Geralt (5k)

I Scream a Truth, You Hear a Lie

AO3 / tumblr: part 1 / part 2 / part 3 / part 4 / part 5 / bonus chapter

In order to prove that witchers aren’t unlovable, Jaskier claims to be Geralt’s husband. Fake Marriage AU (21k)

Nothing is Too Much

AO3 / tumblr: part 1 / this (<- part 2. tumblr won’t let me name it correctly for some reason)

Character Study about how Geralt claims to feel nothing and Jaskier is always told that he feels too much (1k)

Birds Still Sing When They Fall From the Sky

AO3 / tumblr: part 1 /  part 2 /  part 3  /  part 4  / part 5  / part 6  / part 7/  part 8   /  part 9 /  part 10 /  part 11  /  part 12  / part 13 / part 14 / part 15 /  part 16 / part 17 / part 18 / part 19 / part 20 / part 21 / part 22 / part 23 / part 24 kind of belongs to this

They retire to the coast and Geralt has to learn to deal with Jaskier aging (eventual major character death. 86k)

To give without knowing

AO3 / tumblr  masterpost

Geralt carves animals out of wood. When Jaskier finds one of them and believes it was a gift from the fae, Geralt starts secretly giving them to Jaskier (107k)

To keep you warm, though my hands are cold

AO3

Sequel to “to give without knowing”. Jaskier decides to knit things for Geralt, which would be a great idea, if it wasn’t for one tiny problem: Jaskier has no idea how to knit (11k, ongoing)

A new us will begin

AO3 / tumblr: part 1   / part 2 / part 3  / part 4  / part 5 / part 6  / part 7 / part 8 / part 9 / part 10 / part 11 / part 12 / part 13 / part 14

Reincarnation AU, in which Jaskier gets reborn again and again with no memory of his past life. He’ll only regain his memory once his and Geralt’s eyes meet again. (MCD, 85k, not finished yet, two more chapters to go)

Gen:

One Shots:

If I’m Good

AO3 / tumblr

During his first winter at Kaer Morhen, Jaskier has a panic attack because he thinks the witchers don’t really want him to be there (1.8k)

A comforting embrace

AO3 / tumblr

Still thinking that he was the one with the Djinn wishes, Jaskier is overcome by guilt for killing Valdo Marx and goes to Cidaris to visit the troubadour's grave (3k)

I’d rather eat cake

AO3 / tumblr

Ace!Valdo Marx thinks that everyone else is exaggerating when they say how hot someone is (1k)

Did it work?

AO3/   tumblr

Dandelion is aro and also an idiot, so he’s trying to find out what would happen if he drank a love potion. Geralt is there possibly for damage control and to make fun of his friend

Friend of a friend

AO3/ tumblr

Jaskier and Roach might not be getting along, but Geralt loves Roach, so Jaskier will do everything he can to make sure the old shrew is alright (5k)

Give it your all

AO3 / tumblr

mini sequel to “To give without knowing” and “To keep you warm though my hands are cold”. Ciri-centric, with background Geralt/Jaskier

Eskel’s anger

tumblr

Eskel doesn’t allow himself to feel angry because he needs to be the responsible one

Jaskier/Eskel:

one shots:

Be still my bleating heart

AO3 / tumblr

Eskel is on a hunt for a griffin when a brightly dressed bard shows up and tries to set the little goat that Eskel wanted to use as bait free (2k)

The Way to a Poet’s Heart

AO3 / tumblr 

Jaskier finds anonymously posted poems on notice boards and gets angry because they talk badly about witchers. Little does he know they were written by a witcher with self esteem issues (5k)

Multi-Chapter:

Poems for the Poet

AO3 

The Way to a Poet’s Heart from Eskel’s pov (8k, on hiatus)

Valdo/ Jaskier:

One shots:

Beetles and Buttercups

AO3 / tumblr

Valdo Marx pines for Jaskier (1k)

What to give if not a kiss?

AO3 / tumblr

Jaskier draws Valdo’s name for the bardic Secret Santa. The catch? If Valdo doesn’t guess correctly that the gift came from Jaskier, they’ll have to kiss (6k)

Brainstorming for fics:

Trouble at Kaer Morhen (Eskel&Geralt centric)

Thin Ice (fae!Geralt/ fae!Jaskier)

Burn Butcher Burn! (Geralt associating fire with good things and then with very bad things)

When White Wolves Realise (Geralt’s childhood dream gets crushed and then fulfilled)

The Artist’s Biggest Struggle (Jaskier has writer’s block and Geralt tries to inspire him)

Task Failed Successfully

Ambassador Jaskier and Warlord Geralt

Bacreia:

Sabil&Nadya:

The Thief

The Princess

Kira/Riya:

The Dead Girl and the Angel

[dhwty-writes]

Commission Info

Since crush guy (my partner) is getting kicked out by his parents and we now have to move without much notice, I am opening up FOUR commission slots!

If you're interested, contact me via DM or [email protected]

[correctopinionhaver]

[only-tiktoks]

[hamletthedane]

Best part is the background commentary from the other seventh graders:

Student 1: How does he do that???

Student 2, in a bored tone: he’s gay, he can do anything 🙄

[jaskaliina]

man this is so funny

[mumblesplash]

my ‘unreliable narrator’ tshirt has people asking a lot of questions i can’t be trusted to answer correctly

[starpeace]

god this scene i haven’t written would be so emotional if it came with 50k words of context i also haven’t written

[beardedmrbean]

[supreme-leader-stoat]

[headspace-hotel]

We have to keep reblogging this so future historians will read it and puzzle endlessly over its meaning

[moodycow210]

The heavy implication that historical ‘abstract’ poetry that people have been analysing for ages without being able to conclude the meaning could have just been shitpost level in-jokes between poets is sending me.

[omghotmemes]

[a-book-of-creatures]

I’ve said it before, but this was written by a human being imitating a bot. This is from Keaton Patti’s I Forced a Bot to Write this Book, which is entirely written in this style.

[daily-spooky]

[todaysbird]

this is not a baby crow 🚫

^ THIS is a baby crow

[yuumei-art]

Last of Autumn

It's getting so cold now and the red leaves have almost all fallen away

[slowspinningredemption]

had a dream last night where I took a uquiz called “what do you serve?” and at first the questions were standard but as the quiz progressed they became more and more highly specific to me personally and the answers became more and more similar and I realised the quiz Knew me and was forcing me into being honest by giving me no other option so I tried to click out but it just went to the next question which was “are you the spider? or are you the web?” and it had an option for each but I didn’t click either so it then turned to a text box and I typed “I think I’m the fly” and the quiz paused for a while and then took me to a results page that said “you serve truth” and the description just read “what you know will kill you but you will die laughing” so like. good morning everyone I guess :/

[mariaalenkoshepard]

OP I think the devil visited you in your sleep

[jsillabub]

“What you know will kill you but you will die laughing” needs to be added to that list of profound statements from unlikely sources.

[fantome-sans-opera]

@theshitpostcalligrapher

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

On it

[valtsv]

i do honestly fuck so hard with any fantasy or otherwise not a direct 1:1 recreation of the real world setting that acknowledges that mental illness and trauma still exist without compromising the fundamentally different common societal perceptions that would develop around it as a result of that convergent timeline. i love that it allows for more immersive worldbuilding without denying the reality of people's experiences to achieve it. like you can still have PTSD it's just called battle sickness or some shit.

[valtsv]

like this but nobody talks about it because it's called post-prophetic fulfilment syndrome (PPFS) instead

[idiosyncatsy]

really underrated part of the LotR films is when gollum gets exposition lines. like can you imagine? you're travelling with the most fucked-up evil little murder greyhound creature imaginable and he lives in a cave and doesn't know about potatoes but from time to time you have to ask him about local geopolitics. and he answers you

[colorful-craze]

I think that one of the funniest things about Legolas (especially in the movies) is that he’s literally the only Elvish prince in all of Middle-Earth but everyone treats him like he’s just a random guy. And he ACTS like just a random guy as well which makes it even better

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

I can’t make pasta any more without mumbling to myself, “wet the drys… then dry the wets…”

[baggytrousers27]

[caats]

My husband plays this game he calls “king of the cats” where he tries to hold all 3 of our boys at once… today he was successful

[nothing-an-iratze-cant-fix]

Have to acknowledge this poor creature:

He’s so done 😆

[henpillled-deactivated20241123]

i make a mean soup

[mousettte-deactivated20241119]

Now make one that is beautiful and true