Letter to Phob: A deep dive into a man who couldn't refute your politics, so he chose to love you instead.
A Character Study of Prince Thinnakorn's Heartbreak Across the Timelines of Siam
Tin is psychologically incredibly consistent across both timelines. On the surface, he seems full of contradictions: he rebels for love at eighteen, then abandons Phob, then repeatedly claims he has forgotten him, yet melts every single time Phob appears. But when you look at the pressures weighing on him, his behavior follows the exact same internal logic from start to finish. The real conflict here isn't love vs. a lack of love. It’s love vs. duty, and Tin has been conditioned to believe that duty must always come first.
1. Why did Tin actually obey his father and send that letter?
You have to remember that Tin is not just some ordinary son. He’s a Mom Chao, a literal prince. From the day he was born, he’s had these heavy truths drilled into him: his life belongs to the royal family, his father's reputation is his own, his personal happiness comes dead last after his duty, and every single move he makes reflects on the monarchy. That level of conditioning is incredibly hard to break.
Notice how before they're even caught, Tin is actually incredibly rebellious. He treats Phob like an equal, literally sleeps in the servant quarters, apologizes first, kisses Phob knowing full well the class divide, and even convinces his dad to let Phob take the scholarship exam. This isn't a guy who's afraid to push back against convention. He’s already been doing it this entire time.
But then his father catches them, immediately reframing their relationship as a massive abuse of trust. To Tin, that is absolutely devastating because he genuinely loves and respects his father. His dad isn't a villain; he’s portrayed as fundamentally kind. He educated his servants, sponsored Phob, and trusted him completely. So when his father drops that "Is this how you repay me?" guilt trip, Tin suddenly sees himself as the source of immense pain to someone he deeply cares about. Now, he’s trapped between the two people he loves most: Phob and his father. And he knows he can't save them both.
Then comes the duty argument. His father reminds him: "You are my son. You have obligations." This isn't merely about parental authority; it's invoking Tin’s entire identity. He’s been taught since birth that a prince exists to sacrifice himself, an idea reinforced by every Siamese aristocratic ideal he knows. In the end, Tin chooses sacrifice. Not because he stops loving Phob, but because he believes his duty demands killing that part of himself.
Why write such a cruel letter?
Because Tin thinks a clean break heals faster than a festering wound. Notice what he actually writes. He doesn't write, "I still love you." He writes, "I mistook friendship for love." It's a blatant lie, and the fact that he's crying while writing it is our cue that every word is tearing him apart inside. So why lie? Because if he confessed, "I love you but I can't choose you," Phob would wait. He'd hope. He'd stay emotionally trapped. Tin genuinely believes he's setting Phob free, but ironically, he does the exact opposite.
2. Why does Tin keep insisting he’s moved on, only to crumble every single time he sees Phob?
Because he never actually forgot.
It was just survival. Look at Tin’s life from 1921 to 1932. He goes to Britain, becomes the King’s private secretary, and climbs the royal ranks. His entire identity is built on being the perfect prince. How do you pull that off? By burying everything that threatens to break the illusion. His coping mechanism is repression, not healing. Repression tells him: If I never acknowledge this, maybe it doesn't exist.
Then Phob suddenly appears, and that entire wall of repression collapses. Just look at their interactions:
Scene 1 (The Party): Their mouths say, "Nice to meet you," but their eyes are screaming, "I never stopped loving you." They’re performing. The second Phob brushes his hand (a tiny, accidental touch) Tin visibly reacts. It's completely involuntary, immediately bypassing eleven years of carefully built mental defenses.
Scene 2 (The Office): When Tin says, "You should forget it. It meant nothing," he’s not demanding it from Phob. He's begging himself. If Phob can let it go, then maybe Tin can keep pretending. When Phob kisses him, Tin's automatic instinct is to push him away. That's his sense of duty talking.
Scene 3 (The Car): Again, he tries to push him away. But then he sees the tear, and everything shifts. Why? Because while the kiss reminds him of the love, that single tear reminds him of the cost. Tin is no longer fighting temptation; he is looking at the pain he inflicted. Duty loses, and love wins. Again. It's eighteen all over again, Tin has always folded for Phob. The love never left; it was just suppressed.
3. Why does Phob's suffering make Tin feel such crushing guilt?
This is probably the most devastating part of Tin’s psychology. For eleven years, he survived by telling himself a comforting lie: I broke both our hearts, but Phob eventually found another life. It was painful, but it was necessary.
But then reality slaps him in the face. Phob didn’t just move on. He suffered. Miserably. That scar on his hand changes the entire equation. To Tin, it’s not just a scar. It's cold, hard evidence of his own failure. He realizes he wasn't the only victim in this story.
Instantly, his brain constructs a toxic loop of "what-ifs": If I hadn't obeyed, Phob wouldn't have left. He wouldn't have been at the mercy of an abusive nobleman. He wouldn't have been conned. He wouldn't have almost gone to prison. He wouldn't be scarred.
Objectively, none of those things are Tin's fault. They were caused by other people being terrible. But psychologically, guilt works by connecting separate tragedies into a single chain of "if onlys," forcing you to take the blame for outcomes you had absolutely no hand in.
Why does he bolt from the car?
Because the intimacy suddenly becomes too much to bear. Minutes earlier, they’re making out and Tin is finally letting himself feel happy. Then he spots the scar. Immediately, his brain kicks in: This hand suffered because of me. In a split second, pleasure turns to pure guilt. He simply can’t reconcile the paradox: I love him, I hurt him, I want him, but I don't deserve him. Running away is easier than facing all of those truths at the exact same time.
Tin's defining trait (and ultimate tragic flaw) isn't weakness, it's self-sacrifice taken to an unhealthy extreme. Whenever he's forced to choose, his default setting is always: "I will bear the pain." But the real tragedy is that he assumes he's the only one who will suffer. He genuinely convinces himself that leaving Phob protects him, that lying frees him, and that burying his feelings prevents further damage. Yet every one of those choices cuts Phob just as deep. In trying to protect everyone, Tin ends up completely breaking the one person he wanted to shield the most.
Why the dynamic between Tin and Phob is such a perfect mirror: each has internalized a completely different social wound.
Phob's core belief: "I am beneath him. My love is improper because of who I am." That’s why he kneels, apologizes for "taking advantage" of Tin, and later defends his heart with, "My love has dignity, too" when his worth is questioned.
Tin's core belief: "I belong to my family and my title before I belong to myself." That’s why he loves Phob so deeply behind closed doors, but yields the moment his father frames their love as incompatible with his royal duty.
Neither of them ever stops loving the other. Instead, they've both been conditioned to believe that love must always bow to something "greater," for Phob, it's social hierarchy; for Tin, it's princely obligation.
By 1932, both have built outwardly successful lives (Tin as a royal official and Phob as an artillery captain) but emotionally, they’re still carrying the raw, unresolved wounds of 1921. Tin’s constant insistence on leaving the past buried isn’t because he doesn’t care; it's because he's terrified of revisiting a choice he believes already destroyed the person he loved. Every time Phob shows up, that perfect royal facade cracks. The love never actually died, it was just forced underground.
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