It Is I, The Frenchiest Fry

[sleepy-bebby]

hostile work environment

[jordanbolton]

To The Person At The Bus Stop Holding A Bouquet of Red Roses by Jordan Bolton

Part of Scenes from Imagined Films

[bananonbinary]

#the world we live in is a symphony of possible stories (via @not-terezi-pyrope)

[escuerzoresucitado]

hello 🐙

[bogleech]

This is not anthropomorphization but genuinely something theyre known to do. I've heard divers say octopuses and cuttlefish get fascinated by hand gestures and will sometimes respond to them like. We probably do look like we have little cephalopods on the ends of our arms, to them. Like we're always putting on a puppet show.

[theraddestpotato21]

[crazy-brazilian]

[beksboys]

[vicholas]

“This site unusable when you dont care about the new joke” that’s great honestly. I like when people here suffer over inane stuff, it’s funnier than the original joke, let’s keep it going

[vicholas]

this is the same as when the word ‘blorbo’ went big and I found it kinda dumb and corny, but then there were people who were fucking furious about it and wrote angry posts whining about how they hated this site because they couldnt avoid seeing the word blorbo. so I felt like ok I changed my mind I hope people keep saying blorbo forever

[transfemgeorgecostanza]

Astonishing

[fruitpilled-peachcel]

[nuggss]

Ants be like that

[conspiring-limabean]

I used to keep track of the different ant colonies in my yard as a child and it was the wildest shit. You could tell the difference between colonies by colors & pattern if you looked closely enough. They’d stage ant wars on the sidewalks that lasted days, just ants murdering each other, and the cleanup afterwards would last days longer as the survivors pick up and carry away the carcasses. Once I saw a war happening between the colony that lived under the berry bush and a colony I didn’t recognize, and evidently the berry colony lost, because after the war their nest site was empty… and then a few days later was inhabited by the other colony that had fought them.

Once at a lake I saw an ant travel like 3 meters across flat rock carrying a dead ant, and he kept going until he got to the cliff side and then kept going down towards the water, and he didn’t stop until he got to where the rock was wet. Then he stood there for a few seconds, dropped the corpse into the water, waited a little longer, and then headed back the way he came. I feel like I witnessed a ceremony

[fiollaigean]

[kimwexlers]

confident women in their 40s-50s who have allowed themselves to age naturally are literally the hottest people alive

[weaver-z]

Shaggy: Like zoinks, Scoob, I think Velma's into girls

Scooby: Resbians???

[leolaroot]

a kitty is like a stuffed animal that is so heavy and it bite you and she loves you so much and you're best friends

[memorycycle]

man listening to a "song" on his "headphones" and enjoying a flavored handheld "snack": i am waiting for a "walk signal" to cross the "street"

stegosaurus in that same spot 150 million years ago: leafs in front of me

[afeelgoodblog]

Surprise triplets 😂

[sandersstudies]

I can’t decide what’s funnier, if this was a genuine candid photo of the father’s shock, or if he was an excellent sport and was like “hey folks, know what would be hilarious…”

[lizluvscupcakes]

“Yknow, Ted, the guys at the bar are gonna wanna know what it was.”

“Bring the photo! It’ll be funnier if you bring the photo.”

[gay-ellis-thats-all]

Story Time!

My father, who is an identical twin, has two older sisters who were also identical twins. My grandfather’s favourite way to tell the story was that in 1956 when he was awaiting the arrival of 🤷‍♀️ Child™️, the doctor (who, in the small town where we’re from, had delivered my aunts a few years earlier) came to the lounge, lit a cigarette and took a seat next to him.

“Clifford… how are ya?” the doctor greeted.

“I’m alright… yourself?”

“Good, good…good, so how many ya want this time?”

My grandfather, even in the retelling of the story heaved the most world weary sigh and said, “…how many ya got?”

[deerchasingheadlights]

Obsessed w her

[deerchasingheadlights]

She just gets it

[mevil]

[electricpurrs]

[cityrun]

my neighbor thought i fucking DIED because he heard a loud crash (easel & canvas fell over while i was asleep) and had been trying to contact me for like an hour anyway artistic rendition of when i opened my door

[ontologicalevil]

this tweet is incredibly powerful. It shifted something in me