There’s no way to cover this in sucrose

[dogpuppy]

[64mpg]

what do you mean my childhood affected me

[64mpg]

i have terrible news

[silvaurum]

basketball dracula isn't real dude he can't-- *sudden squeaking noises from the shadows*

[silvaurum]

*two pool toys having sex tumble by in the wind* oh thank god

[silvaurum]

*thunderous slam dunk noise*

[fallout-lou-begas]

Visit Original Link

[snoleopard7]

[reallyreallyreallytrying]

people will be like "i'm bored" meanwhile there's baking soda and vinegar in the cupboard. make a volcano dude

[littlegreen]

oh i’m sorry would you rather me beat an alive horse?

[trying-trying2lyk]

i love writing out numbers and then putting them in parentheses like "one (1)" even when i dont need to i think its funny

[succumbing-song]

[outofcontextdiscord]

submitted by @lesausageperson

[emil]

"Peggle make phone calls" has become shorthand for "fuck it, whatever" for me but no one ever knows what im talkingabout and it's also longer (longhand?)

[emil]

peggle make phone calls

[slashermary]

told my roommate dracula was an epistolary novel because it’s made up of letters and she was like. of course it’s made of letters it’s a book

[somethingusefulfromflorida]

[depsidase]

[pseudomantis]

Scientific fraud is the most baffling thing ever to me like do they think they're just going to make a huge breakthrough and no one will notice that it's fake by trying to replicate their results

[pseudomantis]

Yeah actually I just discovered how to turn plastic into gold. Oh you want to know how I did it

Starts running away cutely

[jonnywaistcoat]

[wifegideonnav]

“bits to use in everyday conversations”

[our-queer-experience]

ive been repeating this in my head all week. auntie likes wearing the strap…….

[philcollinsenjoyer]

i think i'd be checking my phone in the cuck chair to be honest

[guerrillatech]

[firagasoap]

Broccoli Knuckle Duster by David Delahunty