Jack Of No Trades Master Of Science

are those hard X-rays in your pocket or are you happy to see me

[burins]

thinking fondly of this meme I made for a coworker years and years ago

[allaboutthems]

[covington-shenanigans]

when i was allegedly a woman i was briefly married to a cis guy before coming out as a lesbian and getting a divorce. my now ex-husband, a genuine sweetheart of a man, was very kind about it all and we remain good friends.

twenty-five (!) years later I came out as a trans man.

now. the important thing to know about my ex-husband is that he loves nothing more than 1) horrible puns, preferably bilingual ones; 2) terrible dad jokes; and 3) committing to the bit until the end of time. he absolutely lives for Shenanigans and Japery. i do not know how his long-suffering wife puts up with him, but they've been married for more than 20 years so presumably she manages.

so, to break the news to my ex, i texted him. the exchange went something like this:

me: "great news, i'm a trans guy now"

him: "oh, congrats!"

me: "thank you. now for the better news: I insist you refer to me henceforth only as your ex-husband. do you accept this challenge?"

and my cis, straight-as-an-arrow, lives-in-the-midwest, married-to-a-minister ex-husband was like

AND HE DOES! gleefully and completely straight-faced, as I understand it. confuses the hell out of everyone, none more than cishet conservative people who've known us both for decades and know for a fact he's only been married twice. I hope he never explains.

[farmwitch]

some things on pins

[lets-steal-an-archive]

[jingle-knight]

I’m soooooo embarrassed. My lord told me “good night,” but I thought he was calling me a good knight, and, well, you could hear it clink against my codpiece.

[tastylemonbread]

posts i think about: thursday edition

[allthingswhumpyandangsty]

[oldhollywoodniall]

[byjove]

bisexual knight: any knights at this tourney want to touch swords with me?

heterosexual knight: I wouldn’t have bothered saving that damsel from that dragon if I had known she was betrothed. Typical. 🙄

asexual knight: just braided my horsey’s mane, am now in search of apples for her.

gay knight: I must locate the Holy Grail. right now. I shan’t tarry, not even for m’lord, though I feel my heart may rend in two on our parting.

[cringemaster4000]

july is when i redeem myself

[cringemaster4000]

july is when i become a human being and also worthy of love

[cringemaster4000]

WE’RE JN JUNE?????

[agnes-nielsens]

you're telling me this hole is significant to the plot?

[kleeklutch]

[rikusqueenofhearts]

[balillee-deactivated20260220]

happy pride month to country mama lynn and country mama lynn only

[iampattonsanders]

Someone give this woman a damn crown and medal

[applejuicewerewolf]

Happy pride month to country mama lynn and ger gay son only

[rabbitheartedfool]

aint it crazy how many people realize they're queer when they have the language to express how they feel and a support system to encourage self exploration????

[wardenaristraith]

I never stop enjoying reading this. Literally everyone's lives improves.

[ya0ishi]

Ancient legends say that if you reblog this on June you get 110% gayer and stronger

[hikarisakurariver]

right at the beginning when she's like how do I help my son feel loved and accepted I'm here shouting "QUEEN YOU ALREADY DID THAT BY TAKING HIS SIDE AND LEAVING THAT NO GOOD HUSBAND FOR HAVING THE AUDACITY TO KICK YOUR BABY OUT!" And Good for her! this is the only response to a man who kicks out a child.

[footlongdingledong]

dip shit you are not turning into the joker. you are barely even turning into the penguin or th e ice guy

[oneheadtoanother]

idk anything about this but I love it

[lynati]

If any competition needed to be on Tumblr, it's this one.

[agoldenplum]

Thanks @slightlylightly founded by Sunny Somrat, This is  SSFood Challenge

The players in and around Bangladesh play and are rewarded with food even losers get food. The combination of colorful games and the feel-good factor of nobody going home empty-handed has given Somrat a genuine hit.

[jareckiworld]

Hideo Tanaka — Cut II   (oil on canvas,  2017)

[dsmsix]

[trzyszczury]

oh im sure

[turnaboutdizzy]

Another banger this one’s my favorite